Man Behind the Mask
by drotuno
Summary: What you see isn't always what you get. By all appearances, Masen lives the life of sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll. He's living the dream that has turned into a nightmare because his life - and his reputation - is not his own. There must be more to life than tour buses, groupies, paparazzi, and slimy record producers. AH/ExB/Rated M
1. Pulling Your Strings

**A/N…Hey guys! I'm back with another one. ;) For those of you that hate A/Ns…this'll be the longest one, unless I answer questions, and those will be at the bottom.**

**If you're curious about how this story came to be, see the Sneak Peek that The Lemonade Stand posted yesterday. They were sweet enough to ask for a preview, so I wrote a little about this new fic. :) **

**For those of you coming off of **_**Rain Must Fall**_**, take a deep breath and relax. I needed something easier and lighter after writing such a heavy, dark fic. This was for pure fun. This is for the love of music, ink, and finding that one person that makes all the bad shit…not so shitty. This is for my love of rock/metal music like Avenged Sevenfold, Metallica, Rush, Led Zepplin, and so many more. This is also for Pamela Stephenson (DrivingEdward), who has begged me for a Rockerward for as long as I've known her, but I never had the plot bunny to do it. ;) **

**This is Rated M for the usual sexy things, not to mention a bit of drama, language, and all around adult things. It's mostly canon, which means all the major characters are the same and the minor characters may not line up with original coupling. And while these characters were inspired by **_**several**_** bands and singers, there isn't a specific one that sums it up. The songs/lyrics belong to their respective bands/writers. Lastly, the normal cast of characters belongs to SM, but the plot and original characters belong to me. **

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 1 – Pulling Your Strings**

_Master of Puppets I'm pulling your strings  
Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams  
Blinded by me, you can't see a thing  
Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream_

_Master, Master, where's the dreams that I've been after?_  
_Master, Master, you promised only lies_  
_Laughter, Laughter, all I hear or see is laughter_  
_Laughter, Laughter, laughing at my cries_

"_Master of Puppets" – Metallica _

**EDWARD**

"Thank you, Seattle! Good night!" I cheered into the mic, reaching down to slap the hands of screaming fans on my way toward the side of the stage.

"Awesome as always, baby brother," Emmett said with a grin, handing me a towel and a bottle of water. "C'mon. We'll get you backstage." He led me through the throngs of people, reaching female hands, and busy crewmen as I wiped sweat from my face and chugged the whole bottle of water. "Damn tight after a few months off, yeah?" he asked, holding my dressing-room door open.

"Yeah," I rasped, pushing by him for more water.

When there was a knock on the door, Emmett went to tend to it as I fell down onto the sofa. Fuck…live shows were the best part of my life. My heart raced, my adrenaline was still pumping, and I felt like I owned the damn world. It had been months since we'd played a live show, and it would be another few months before we picked back up touring. It was off the stage that shit got…messy.

"Hey, babe," Emmett sang, letting his wife into the room.

She kissed him and then turned to me. "You have an interview," she stated without much pause, slipping into the role of Radiant Eclipse's manager with ease.

"Now?"

"Aro set it up before talking to me about it. She's just outside."

Wincing, I shook my head. "Aw, hell… Who is it?"

"Jessica Stanley from _Music Mania Magazine_."

"You've _got_ to be kidding!"

"Afraid not, brother-in-law," she sighed wearily. "I tried to reschedule, but it just won't work."

"Fuck." I raked a hand through my hair. "Can't Jasper do it?"

"I'm sorry, Edward, but I need you to do this. They want _Masen_. They want the front man."

I met her gaze when she used my real name, not the stage name. Only those who truly knew me called me Edward, and I never used it in public.

"Apparently, Aro gave her exclusivity to the first interview since you've been home. Hell, yes, she's gonna want details of the last few months. However, I want you to push the album you guys are about to finish recording, not to mention the tour coming up." Rose sighed again but smirked at me. "She's a fan, so use that shit. I saw her out there – front row and center. I'd be surprised if her panties are still intact."

Snorting into a chuckle, I fell back against the sofa, but I checked to make sure that I had everything I needed for this godforsaken interview.

Rubbing my face, I groaned but then mumbled to her to give me a second. "You stickin' around for this?" I asked when she walked back toward the door.

"Nah, as much as I'd love to see her face when you do this shit, I have to make a few calls, but if you're good, I'll send your girls in to save you," she teased, which made me laugh. She glanced at her watch. "What do you think? Thirty minutes?"

I nodded to her. "Fair enough." Before she left the room, I called her back. "Hey Rose! Can't we squash the personal part?"

She wrinkled her nose, shaking her head. "Just…do what you do, _Masen_. Scramble her brains enough, and she'll forget all about rehab and the accident."

Frowning, I nodded, finally getting up from the sofa. I shuffled into the bathroom to piss and clean up a little. Rose owed me big-time for this shit, but then I remembered this wasn't her doing.

"Fucker," I grumbled at the thought of Aro, our record producer.

He'd sent Jessica on purpose just to fuck with me, just to prove he held all the control over me and the band, not to mention how much trouble he'd had to handle with everything that had happened. He'd made us huge, given us our first and second record, and we'd gone platinum on each, which made everyone involved very happy…and very rich. We'd been young and dumb, signing that first contract. We had one more record to make for him and one more tour to promote, and then I wanted away from Volturi Records…and I wasn't even sure I gave a shit if the rest of Radiant Eclipse came with me—although I knew if I left, Jasper would be right by my side.

I reached for the back of my T-shirt, wrenching the sweaty thing off before opening the door to reveal screaming girls. Playing up the sexy, bad boy, clichéd rock star was a part of the job, and a lot of it I hated because it was so fake, but in all reality, my fans were fantastic, and being accessible kept them coming back for more – more music, shows, merchandise – and their excitement was contagious as they rambled about the show. Grinning, I let them touch and kiss me, let them take pictures, and signed a handful of autographs on anything from concert programs to a girl's tits – that last one begged for the T-shirt in my hands, and I let her have it. Emmett pushed them along, shooting a wink my way, before allowing two people to step closer.

Jessica Stanley was younger than some of the journalists I'd talked to, and she was a decent writer, but she had a tendency to focus on the personal part of her subjects, not the professional side. She also had a reputation for sleeping with just about everyone she interviewed. She loved her rock stars…literally. It irritated the shit out of me.

Her photographer, on the other hand, was an asshole. Laurent liked to freelance for the paparazzi when he wasn't selling his photos to magazines and newspapers. He made more money for the rags and gossip websites. In fact, he'd followed my ass all the way to rehab. How he'd found me, I had no fucking clue, but Rose assured me she'd find out.

With one last deep breath, I turned away from the door, aiming for the basket I knew Rose always left here and giving a lazy smile Jessica's way.

"Masen, it's good to see you again," she purred, reaching out a hand as I picked up a bottle from the basket, unscrewing the cap.

The amber-colored liquid sloshed inside as I practically drained it before taking her hand. I kissed the back of it, giving her another smile.

"Mouthwatering as ever, Miss Stanley," I crooned against her fingers. "Ditch camera boy, and maybe we can…"

Her giggle was exactly what I wanted, and she shot a look to Laurent, who scowled my way, but I ignored him, smirking when Jessica trailed a perfectly manicured nail over my bare chest. I took another long drink from the bottle as I stayed right in front of her. I wanted to chuckle when her eyes darkened as she stared unabashedly at my bare torso down to where my jeans were unbuttoned, as if she was memorizing every tattoo, every muscle.

I knew the dreadlock fucker was already snapping pictures, but I focused on Jessica, picking up her backstage pass that was hanging around her neck.

"Did you like the show, Miss Stanley?" I asked, twirling the pass in my fingers, only to let it drop back to her stomach.

"Jessica, you silly thing! How many times do I have to tell you, Masen? Call me Jessica," she said with a smile. "And yes, of course. It was hot as always."

My crooked smile made her blush, which I found hilarious, considering the things I'd heard about her. She wasn't exactly a blushing virgin.

"It was the perfect comeback for you," she purred, but I caught the look in her eye.

I huffed a laugh through my nose but led her to the sofa. "Jessica, you work for a music magazine. Let's stick to music, shall we?" I sat next to her, and she leaned in. "New album, new tour…don't you want the scoop?"

"Actually, she wants to know all about court-ordered rehab, Masen," Laurent piped up, snapping a few more pictures.

"Drinking and driving. We've all done it. I just got busted," I hedged but kept a smile on my face as I turned to Jessica, tilting her head back so that we were face to face. "What more is there to know?"

"W-Well," she sputtered, looking up at me from beneath her lashes as her fingers trailed over the ink on my bicep. "There are rumors going around that you weren't the driver."

I rolled my eyes to hide my surprise but sighed dramatically. "Rumors," I scoffed, waving a hand toward Laurent. "Now you're treading dangerously into paps territory. I heard you were better than that fucking garbage."

That seemed to get her attention, so she changed direction, thankfully, sticking to music, the new album we were currently recording, and how big the promotional tour would be.

Like clockwork, there was a knock on the door exactly thirty minutes after Jessica had stepped into my dressing room.

"I'm afraid our time is up, Miss Stanley," I said sadly, patting her leg before getting up to answer the door. I braced myself for what was to come. Two very tall, very pretty blondes burst into the room and latched on to either side of me. I choked back a laugh, but the smile was genuine as I pulled them close. "Ladies," I greeted them as hands and lips met my skin. Hell, I didn't even care if Laurent snagged a few photos before they walked toward the door. "Hey, Jessica… Next time, leave the camera boy behind. We could have some _fun_." I palmed the plump ass in my right hand, chuckling when she blushed again and opened the door.

When the door clicked closed behind them, a hand smashed to my face, shoving me down to the sofa.

"You know, you like that shit too much," Tanya scolded with a laugh, folding her arms across her plentiful chest. "And you're probably the reason why we prefer pussy." She gestured to her girlfriend,Kate, who was just smirking at us with a slow shake of her head. She tolerated so much, simply because Tanya was a crazy woman.

"I understand why you prefer pussy," I countered with a laugh, raising my eyebrows up and down and ducking the pillow Kate tossed at my head. "You _used _to like dick."

"All those memories are blurry," she scoffed, though her smile was funny when Kate laughed. "Sorry about that interview, Edward."

"Fuck it. Eventually someone's gonna want to know about that accident and rehab, but I wasn't telling that woman," I sighed, frowning a little at the "rumor" Jessica had mentioned. Only three people knew about the night of the accident, and I needed to speak to one of them. I turned my attention back to Tanya, picking up the prop whiskey bottle with a grin. "Nice job, by the way. The tea's good. Honey?"

"Yes, _dear_," Tanya replied sarcastically. "It's good for your throat after your show, which was an amazing job, mind you."

Nodding, I thanked her again. Tanya was Rose's personal assistant and a damn good one. She was also Rose's cousin. We'd all known each other for ages. In fact, Emmett had dated Tanya before he fell for Rose, which was why I liked to tease her about her love for women. She also did shit that probably fell outside her job description, like faking the whiskey for me, which made me think of Aro again.

I turned the liquor bottle, now empty of its tea, over in my hands. As good as my band was – and we were fucking tight – Aro liked to maintain a certain image. Sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll. I hated the politics of it all. I hated being something I wasn't. I just wanted to write music and sing.

I felt the sofa dip next to me, and I glanced over to see Kate. "You okay?"

I nodded but set the bottle down on the table in front of us. "Yeah, just…it's been a wretched few months."

Tanya literally growled, rolling her eyes and falling down on the other side of me. "I can still give that ex of yours a beatdown. Bailing on you when you probably needed her the most…bitch."

Grinning, I shook my head. "Nah."

"You sure?" Kate offered, smirking my way. "Between T and me, we could probably manipulate some sort of lesbian scandal!"

A laugh barked out of me. "As tempting as that may be, ladies, no. Leave it. She showed her true colors when I had to go away." Both women huffed unhappily, and I wrapped arms around them. "Thanks for having my back, though."

Tanya stood up, kissing my temple. "If you change your mind, just say the word, Edward. Personally, I'm glad the bitch is gone. I'm not _quite_ sure she could be trusted."

"You think she cheated?"

Kate snorted. "I think she did a lot of things when you weren't looking, which was a lot of the time, sweetie – the _least _of which was cheating. She latched herself to your fame and bank account. Thank fuck you didn't marry her! And I'd be willing to bet that all those times the paps found you…that it was her who called them."

"Hmm," I hummed in agreement. "Rose thought the same thing." I sighed deeply, the high from performing finally starting to fade. "Speaking of… Would you tell her I need to talk?"

"Yeah, sure," Tanya said, holding out a hand for Kate.

They were truly beautiful women – long legs, blonde hair, and fit bodies. But they were good friends, too. When Tanya had dated my brother just out of high school, we'd gotten close. It was me who figured out that the reason they were fizzling out wasn't because of Emmett but because Tanya preferred women – specifically, Kate. She'd shown up at my door in tears, if only because she didn't want to hurt him. Funnily enough, Emmett had been eyeing Rose for some time; he'd stayed quiet for the same reason – fear of hurting Tanya. They'd parted as friends.

"Thanks for saving my ass tonight." I chuckled when they smiled my way.

"Anytime," Tanya sang. "Besides, we withhold the rights to make sure the next chick that sinks her claws in you passes our inspection."

Grinning, I waved them away. "That shit won't happen."

When the door opened, the screams picked up again, but I wasn't in the mood now. Sitting forward, I leaned my elbows on my knees, and my fingers sank into my hair, gripping hard. The door opened and closed again, and I glanced up to see Rose standing there.

"So…how'd it go?"

My eyes narrowed on her. "We have a problem," I stated. "More than that fucker, Laurent, following me to Serenity Rehabilitation Center."

"What now?" she asked, sitting on the table in front of me.

"Jessica said there was a rumor that I wasn't the driver."

Rose's mouth fell open. "Now how in the fuck would she have heard that?!"

I was shaking my head the entire time. "I dunno, but someone's leaking info or some shit."

"There are only four people…technically three—"

"I _know_!"

We were quiet for a moment, though the noise from the hallway outside was still pretty loud. I glanced down to the ink on my chest. "Thicker than water" was etched into my skin, and it was the truth.

When I met Rose's gaze once more, she said, "I just wonder what other information is leaking out there."

"Does it matter?" I argued, getting up from the sofa and starting to pace. "I mean… I couldn't give two shits what people know about me, but…"

"Aro does," she countered. "Edward, we just have this one last year. I promise you; you don't have to re-sign with Volturi, but we do have to finish out this contract, or he could ruin you." She came to stand in front of me. "I know you hate it, and you have every right, but after this last tour, he won't own you. And you guys will have enough pull to produce for yourselves." She cupped my face. "I will do my very best to cushion all of this shit for you. I know the focus is on you more than the rest of the band, simply because of the accident, not to mention your fan base. But you gotta meet me halfway. Play the part for a little longer, Edward. Please?"

I sighed at the pleading of her voice but nodded.

"You can be whatever you need to be when it's just us, but out there…I need Masen. I need his wild ways to keep you in the spotlight, if only to satisfy Aro. With this new album, Edward, you'll have established yourselves enough that you could shave your head and wear clown shoes for all I care." When I snorted, she smirked. "In fact, it's a good thing that you settle down after this last tour, but until then…"

"Aro," we said together.

"Okay…" I kissed her temple. "I'm gonna shower and head back to the hotel. I need a beer."

"I'll have the driver ready for you. But watch the paps at your hotel, and don't you dare punch Laurent!" she warned, pointing a finger into my chest. "It's one thing to play a part, but it's another having to bail you out for assault. Aro may think there's no such thing as bad publicity, but he doesn't have to hear your family."

Frowning at the mention of my family, I nodded, stepping into the bathroom. Once I was cleaned up and dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, I pulled on my leather jacket and stepped out into the hallway that had cleared out a little. The roadies were breaking down the stage, and a few shot waves my way as I pushed my way toward the back exit.

I passed by James's dressing room, shaking my head. Drummers got more play, or at least, James did. He gave me a shit-eating grin when three women were draped all over him as he reached to close the door.

"Pig," I heard behind me, and I spun to see Alice standing there.

"That he is, Alice," I agreed, leaning down to kiss her cheek. "I lost a shirt tonight. My apologies." She not only kept us looking good onstage, but she was married to my oldest friend and my song-writing partner.

She chuckled. "I buy them in bulk, so no worries." Before I could walk away, she grabbed my hand. "Jasper wants to brainstorm with you before the first recording session. He's worked out a fantastic melody."

"Yeah?" My eyebrows rose up high.

"Yeah, it's really pretty. Something slower, but still…"

"Words?"

"No, he was hoping you'd come up with something."

"We'll see," I told her. "Tell him I'll call him in the next day or two."

She nodded, stepping back into his dressing room. I didn't see any more of my bandmates, but that didn't mean much. Jacob, my bass guitarist, had a disabled father to tend to, and he was happy we were in our hometown for a lengthy amount of time. My keyboardist, Alec, was married, and his wife was expecting, so he, too, probably went home.

I was the only one without a place to call my own. I'd been living in a hotel since I'd gotten out of rehab. By the time I'd fallen into the limo, my mood was sour. It should've been a good night. Playing live local shows were our favorite, but with the interview, the leaks, and now the paps I could see hanging around the hotel's front door, I was tired and irritable.

"Tony, keep going. Drop me off a block or two over. I'll sneak in the back or some shit," I told the driver.

"Masen, Miss Rose told me to make sure you got back okay…"

"And you are, Tony. You've done your job. You don't know where I went after you dropped me off," I told him, opening my own door when he'd stopped the limo a block away.

"Yes, sir," was the last thing he said before I slammed the car door, essentially cutting him off.

I needed to walk. I needed to clear my head. Shoving my hands into my jacket pockets against the chilly weather, I turned to walk down the sidewalk in the opposite direction of my hotel. I walked another block before taking a right, only to run into what I'd been trying to escape.

"_Masen!"_

"_Masen, how did it feel to perform after rehab?"_

"_Heidi Summers said you're no longer together. She's been seen around town with her co-star, Peter Grisham. What do you say about that?"_

"_How's it feel to be clean and sober, Masen? Can you still perform?"_

The whole sidewalk was covered with paps and cameras and now curious fans. I pushed my way through them, ignoring the questions and dodging microphones. I hated to give the cold shoulder to my fans, but I didn't want to give the vultures a chance to corner me. Gritting my teeth, I turned the next corner, breaking into a run in order to lose them all. Across the street was a bar – Charlie's Pub.

Yanking open the door, I ducked in quickly, practically bowling someone over. "Fuck, I'm sorry," I panted, my hand immediately reaching out to help them up.

A sweet laugh met my ears, and I realized it was a woman I'd knocked to the floor.

"It's okay," she said, dusting herself off, but we both turned when there were voices on the other side of the door. "C'mere," she instructed, pulling me behind the bar. "Get down."

I chuckled, doing as she said, and I was glad I did because the door slammed open almost as I hit the deck.

"Did you see a guy come through here?" one of them asked.

I glanced up from my spot on the floor to rake up shapely legs, a nice ass in tight jeans, and a beautiful head full of brunette hair. Her face scrunched up a little as she shook her head. She picked up a rag from the bar, slinging it over her shoulder, and jerked a thumb behind her. I noted a touch of ink that appeared when her shirt rode up a little.

"Tall guy, leather jacket?"

"Yeah…"

"Yeah, he ran through here but out the back door."

They thanked her, and I heard the door close. My head fell back to the wood behind me, and I sighed with relief.

"Thanks," I told her, looking up to see a very amused smile and dark-brown eyes gazing at me.

"Get up, Masen," she said with a laugh, tapping the top of the bar as I stood up. "You look like you could use a beer."

"You know…" I started, but she pointed toward the flatscreen mounted in the corner.

"You've been on TV all damn night. Sit," she told me, picking up a glass mug and pouring a draft. "Rough day?"

Snorting, I rolled my eyes as I took a stool in front of her. "Yeah, I guess," I mumbled, thanking her for the beer when she set it down in front of me.

She nodded but smiled sweetly. Jesus, she really was kind of hot. And my curiosity piqued when more ink on her back was revealed when she started stocking up the shelves of glasses. I broke away from staring at the poor girl to take a look around the place.

It was an old bar, one I'd never even noticed before. It was deep woods, a long bar, and a handful of tables and chairs. My eyes caught the far side of the room, where a deep-red curtain seemed to be covering a stage. All along the walls there were musical instruments, old black-and-white photos, and a "For Rent" sign on the door, but there wasn't a soul in the joint.

"I was just about to close up," she said out of the blue.

"I can go," I told her, but she shook her head with a smile.

"Take as long as you like," she offered. "I've got nowhere else to be, and if you leave now, your fan club will hunt you down."

Smiling in thanks, I sipped the beer. "Since you know my name…"

She laughed, holding out her hand. "Bella. Bella Swan. Now…let me get you another beer, and you can tell me why you look like someone kicked your puppy…"

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… For a bit of a Chapter 2 teaser, go check out The Lemonade Stand.**

**As of now, I've written about half of this story. I can tell you that the chapters will range from about 4500 words to 6500…give or take. It's mostly in Edward's POV, but Bella will make an appearance every now and then. **

**Since I'm so far ahead, updates will be every Sunday and every Wednesday. Yes, there will be a playlist, which will fit the genre of music Radiant Eclipse plays. Yes, I'll post pic teasers on FB and Twitter. If you haven't seen the banner and manip that Beffers87 made for this fic, you have to go take a peek at it; it's gorgeous. **

**I need to thank my pre-readers…GooberLou, DrivingEdward, and inkedupmom…thanks guys for all you do. An addition this time around was SueBee0619, and she's been an amazing help! Special thanks to Edward'sEternal, who lets me brainstorm with her all the time! And big smooches to Jenny, as always. Love you, babe.**

**Okay, see you guys Thursday, with pics in between. Again, the A/Ns won't always be this long, but sometimes, shit happens. Until next time… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	2. House of Pain

**A/N… Thank you guys so much for the HUGE reception of Edward/Masen! I won't keep you up here. I know you're ready to really meet Bella, and find out more about Edward – the accident, rehab, his drinking. I'll let you get to it, but thank you again for all your kind words! :)**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 2 – House of Pain**

_I'm not trying to fake it  
And I ain't the one to blame.  
There's no one home  
In my house of pain.  
I didn't write these pages  
And my script's been rearranged.  
No, there's no one home  
In my house of pain_

"_House of Pain" – Faster Pussycat_

**EDWARD**

"Bella. Bella Swan. Now…let me get you another beer, and you can tell me why you look like someone kicked your puppy…"

My eyes stayed locked on the gorgeous girl across from me. Girl. The word made me scoff internally, simply because she had to be somewhere near my own age – mid-twenties – so she wasn't a girl. But she was, indeed, beautiful. It was natural, too. I'd seen so many fake, surgically enhanced women that taking in Bella Swan's fresh face was like a deep breath of clean sea air. She was smooth skin, a petite, shapely body, dark-brown eyes, and a small smile quirking up on her face as I simply stared at her.

Snorting, I shook my head. "It's all bullshit," I muttered, swallowing the last of my beer in three large gulps, only to set the mug down.

"It usually is," she agreed.

Grinning down at the bar top, I nodded. "Yeah." I glanced up when my mug was taken gently from my hand and a new full one took its place.

She went back to stocking bottles and clean mugs and followed that up by wiping down the bar. I forced my eyes to stay on the mug in my hands, not the poor girl who was kind enough to save me from the paps. I was just about to thank her again when the TV's broadcast caught my ear, if only because I heard my name.

"_Radiant Eclipse put on a comeback concert tonight in their hometown of Seattle. Front man and songwriter, Masen, who is only two months out of his stint in rehab, led his group in a performance of their chart-topping, critically acclaimed hits._

"_Masen, who was arrested for DUI several months ago, took to the stage tonight in his usual wild manner."_

My eyes narrowed on the TV as they showed parts of that night's show. We sounded tight, though the video was shaky and most likely someone's damn phone. They switched from Radiant Eclipse onstage to what looked like the photos that Laurent had snapped in my dressing room with Jessica. The prop bottle of whiskey was in my hand, and I was shirtless and working the poor journalist.

"_It seems nothing changes about Masen…"_

I'd almost forgotten about Bella, but her cleaning had stopped and suddenly the TV's sound clicked off, leaving my idiotic face in various places up on the screen in silence. Grimacing, I forced myself to meet her gaze, expecting disgust but only seeing curiosity and maybe a little pity.

"Fun, huh?" I asked before drinking from my beer again.

"If I judged everyone who had problems, I wouldn't have a business," she said softly, but it was the sweet blush on her face that made me chuckle.

"Very true, Bella." I took another drink but glanced at the TV, where they were still talking about me. I saw Heidi and the asshole she was seeing now. I'd had suspicions that she was fucking around with her costar, but seeing it was not as upsetting as I thought it would be, or maybe I felt validated. "And if I believed everything everyone said about me, I'd either be the second coming of Christ…or the Devil himself."

The sweetest giggle met my ears, and I grinned her way, shrugging a shoulder. Sweet God, she was stunning when she smiled. It took over her whole face and caused the most adorable scrunch in the middle of her nose. Suddenly, I just needed her to know something.

"Not everything you see is…the truth," I sighed, waving a dismissive hand toward the infernal TV.

Bella studied my face, draping a white towel over her shoulder. She took the remote and turned the television off. "Well, if you want to talk about it…" She smiled so sweetly. "They say your bartender is better than a therapist."

Laughing, I shook my head. "My therapist was bought and paid for by people that simply needed me out of rehab in order to continue my job. I'm a fucking dancing monkey."

"I doubt that," she countered, leaning a hip on the other side of the bar. "The dancing monkey part, anyway. However, I'm only the cost of a few beers, for which _you_ are paying this time." She stepped around the bar, and my eyes followed her as she flipped off the "OPEN" sign and clicked the lock on the front door. "Now you can't be interrupted."

Something about that – about _her_ – made me feel safe but also worried for her to be so trusting.

"Bella, you don't know me," I whispered, finishing another beer.

"I don't know a lot of people, but I have to serve them daily, and I've heard it all."

Grinning at that, I nodded. "I bet. Woeful tales of misfortune and heartbreak, huh?"

"And then some." She sighed, but the smile was still there, as was the warmth in those brown eyes while she set down another beer. "Then again, _you _don't know _me. _Mistrust can be a sharp, bitter pill…" She leaned her elbows on the bar across from me.

"Fuck, that's the truth, too." I sighed, my head falling back, and I raked my fingers through my hair. When I finally looked back at her, something in me cracked a little. "You ever felt yanked in every fucking direction?"

"Of course." She pointed around. "This place…it belonged to my dad. When he passed away, it became mine. I was in school at the time. Try studying for college finals while working until two and three o'clock in the morning almost every night."

Wrinkling my nose, I nodded. "Oh, damn. Sorry about your father, though."

She smiled, but it wasn't as real as the others she'd given me since I'd been inside her place. "Thank you."

Sighing, I gazed around the place, huffing a humorless laugh. "I started out just a kid playing guitar in my garage with my friends. Fuck me, I miss those days. I miss playing places like this – small bars and venues. It was…so exciting, so _intimate_." I rubbed my face, took a sip of beer. "It was a place like this where we were 'discovered.'"

Bella laughed at my air quotes but didn't say anything.

My eyes stayed locked on that red curtain for a second, but I sniffed, shaking my head. "I wasn't supposed to be discovered," I said softly, looking back at Bella. I shook my head again. "The band was just to…let off steam, fuck around a little in our spare time. I'd been shoved into piano lessons since before I could reach the pedals."

"Oh, yeah?"

Scrunching up my face, I nodded, placing a hand on my chest. "Classically trained pianist. Self-taught guitar."

"That's not a bad thing, Masen," she said with a laugh. "You say that like you're embarrassed by it."

"No, no," I countered with a shake of my head. "Not at all." I shrugged out of my jacket, holding out my arms that were covered in swirls of colorful ink. "But when you look like this…"

"Who cares?" she asked, smirking at me.

"My parents, for one."

"Mm, yeah, but usually that's because they simply want the best for their children."

"Maybe."

I fell quiet for a moment, just long enough for her to get another beer. Only this time, she poured one for herself.

When I chuckled, she smiled, saying, "What? It's closin' time."

"I can go, Bella." Although, now the offer was halfhearted, at best, if only because her company was so damned soothing.

Raising her eyebrow at me, she set her mug down and walked to the window. Peeking out into the street, she chuckled. "Um, not yet. Your fan club is still buzzing around out there." She turned to face me. "Or… If you hang in there, I'll sneak you out."

"Why?" I asked without thinking. This woman didn't know me, and she certainly didn't act like a fan, so I couldn't possibly fathom what she'd get out of what she'd done for me already, much less what she'd just offered.

I thought she'd laugh at the question, but she didn't. She frowned, and I didn't like it. Then she licked her lips, taking a deep breath and letting it out. When she was back on the other side of the bar, she reached for a picture just above the cash register.

"Because I think the media is made of blood-thirsty vultures. I'm aware that certain jobs require people to be…I don't know…public figures, but I'm not sure that gives the media the right to treat them like second-class citizens."

The framed photo was set down on the bar in front of me. It was a fairly large frame filled with a collage of pictures, but the bottom of the frame was taken up with a newspaper article that was dated a mere three years prior.

_Local Blues Guitarist Perishes in the Streets of Seattle_

I read the article, but my mouth fell open as I realized just who her father was.

"Whoa…wait, wait, wait…" I gaped at her as she smiled a little. "Your dad was…Chainsaw Charlie Swan?!"

"Yeah, he was." She seemed to burst with pride at the sound of his stage name. And she should be proud.

"Holy fuck! Chainsaw Charlie was a guitar legend!" I whispered, rereading the article again. "This is so fucked up," I sighed, tapping the glass of the frame. "Seriously? They didn't stop taking pictures long enough to help him?"

"No."

"That's so fucking messed up!" I practically growled, gripping my hands in my hair. "Bella, I'm so sorry."

She smiled, but it was wavering on her face, and those deep-brown eyes were a little watery.

"Me, too."

That answer hung between us heavily. And suddenly, I was on my feet wanting to see the rest of the pictures hanging on the walls. The man was a musical genius, very well-known in Seattle. He'd started out with his own work – blues, jazz, old-school rock – but eventually, he started working as a studio guitarist. In fact, he'd been credited on a shit-ton of albums that resided on my iPod.

"Oh, God…Jasper would love this place," I thought aloud, which made her chuckle from somewhere behind me.

There were shots of Charlie with insanely talented people, shots of him playing, even shots of him teaching guitar lessons to kids. The latter reminded me so much of myself – just a scrawny, nerdy kid who had been forced into piano lessons to play Beethoven, Chopin, and Debussey but wanted to emulate the rock gods that played on the radio and hung in posters on the wall of my bedroom.

Gazing around the bar again, I shook my head in wonder. "This was his place," I whispered.

"Oh, yeah." Her voice was soft, but when I turned around, she was leaning against the bar with her beer mug up to her lips. When she pulled it away, she smiled a little. "He left it to me, which was a surprise to everyone, I think. He and my mother were never married, but they took turns with me growing up. I was never…" She waved a hand around the room. "I was never musically inclined, but he tried. I love music, but I can't play for shit."

Grinning, I let out a chuckle.

"Anyway, some of his old friends wanted this place, but I fought to keep it. My mother wants nothing to do with it, or music, or any of it, but she understands my need to be…" She struggled with the word, and I nodded in understanding.

"Connected."

She smiled. "Yeah." She sighed deeply. "The whole building is mine. The bar, as you can see, isn't booming, but the apartments I rent out upstairs help me pay the bills, the very few employees I have, and keep me fed."

I pointed to the "For Rent" sign, and she nodded as she finished her beer.

"I guess I should finally get out of your hair," I muttered, reaching for my wallet. I'd had enough beer to ease my stressful day, not to mention give me a bit of a headache tomorrow, but not enough to forget that I owed the girl in front of me a huge debt of gratitude. "I really need to thank you again."

"Not yet," she said with a laugh. "We still need to get you back to your hotel."

Laughing, I shook my head as I handed her my credit card. "How do you know?"

She took the card and walked to the register, glancing down at it. I wondered what she was thinking, because her brow furrowed a little. My legal name was on my card, my IDs, and everything I owned, but the world only knew me as Masen.

"I told you… You've been on TV all day," she stated, sliding the credit slip across the bar top to me. "You're the local band that made it big. That makes for interesting news, I guess."

Snorting, I signed the receipt, leaving her a healthy tip, simply because she deserved it for staying so late for me. "The interesting news is all the bullshit outside the band, Bella. Admit it."

She wrinkled her nose. "Yeah, I suppose."

There it was. The look of unsure curiosity that I'd expected way before now, and it made me self-conscious and a tad embarrassed as I pulled my jacket back on. For some reason, I needed her to know the truth, or at least that everything they reported wasn't exactly how it seemed.

"That's not…me." I grimaced at how trite that sounded.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me, Masen."

"Edward," I corrected, shaking my head and raking a hand through my hair. "My real name is Edward Anthony Masen Cullen. My friends call me Edward."

"That's quite a mouthful," she teased.

"Yeah, well…blame my parents. I do."

She smiled, and a touch of pink flashed across her beautiful cheeks. She held out her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Edward."

I took her hand and shook it, liking the warmth of it in mine, not to mention the feel of surprisingly smooth skin, in spite of what she did for a living.

"You ready to get back?" she asked.

"You don't need to…" I gestured toward the bar and register.

"Nah, the benefit of being the boss is being able to let shit slide until the next day." She grinned a little, and fuck me, she was beautiful. "C'mon…I'll show you how to sneak by the horde."

Nodding, I followed her behind the bar and into the back. There was a small kitchen area, some storage for her liquor stock, and what I could only guess were the kegs of beer hooked up to the taps at the bar. She flipped off the lights of the main bar, set an alarm, and opened a back door.

When she locked the door behind us, I realized we were in an alleyway. To my left was a set of stairs up the side of the building. To my right was the street.

"Go out that way, but shoot directly across the street toward the left-side corner. Up one block is your hotel," she told me. "You'll see the side entrance."

"Thanks," I whispered, looking back at her. "Bella, I…" I stumbled over what I wanted to say.

She smirked, pushing me a little. "You need more therapy, _Edward_, then just come see me. But I promise…all your secrets are safe with me."

"I know," I whispered, frowning at how easily I could say that since I'd just met her, but it was the truth. I could tell she just didn't give a shit about any of the asinine side of fame. Her face read like a book, but I decided to tease her instead. "You just can't get enough woeful tales, huh?"

She giggled at me as I peeked around the corner for the paps, and I grinned back at her. Maybe I was drunker than I'd estimated. Before I took off, she whispered my name.

"Edward?" she hissed, making sure no one heard her. "Everyone has bullshit to deal with, and everyone has to put on a mask to deal with it."

With that said, she turned on her heel and went up the stairs. I watched to make sure she went inside her door before darting across the street like she'd told me. The paps never even saw me, and when the side entrance to my hotel loomed ahead, I simply smiled, shaking my head as I dove inside before anyone could see me.

**~oOo~**

"Masen, get up!"

Groaning, I buried myself deeper into the covers, pulling a pillow over my head. I'd already dropped the alarm clock onto the floor to shut it up, along with my cell phone that never seemed to stop vibrating across the fucking nightstand.

"Edward, don't make me get a bottle of water out of the fridge!"

My middle finger found its way out from the covers-burrito I was happily wrapped up in and saluted the annoying voice. I wanted to drown in the dreams I'd been having about sweet smiles and dark eyes. Sleep started to take me again, until my pillow was yanked away and frigid water nailed me from head to fucking toe.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Rosalie!" I snapped, flying up out of bed, but I had to fall back down to the edge of the mattress when the world tilted on its axis thanks to the massive hangover I was sporting. "I swear to God, I put the 'Do Not Disturb' sign up last night."

She snorted into a harsh laugh that cut through to the middle of my brain like nails on a chalkboard. "That sign is up twenty-four-seven, doofus, and it doesn't stop me; I have a key. The hotel staff is afraid to look in here, though, for fear you've overdosed or something."

The ridiculousness of that statement made me roll my eyes as I held my head in my hands, leaning my elbows on my thighs. Again, my pounding head made my temper rise to the edge, simply because I'd spent thirty days in rehab lockdown and I was fucking clean as a damn whistle. Beer was the only drink I truly bought on a regular basis – I'd smoked weed in the past but had stopped when it had fucked with my singing voice. Groaning, I swallowed back the anger because I knew I'd go back to rehab again if I had to.

Two pills appeared in my blurry vision, along with the remaining bottle of water that she hadn't used on me.

"Thanks," I rasped, taking them from her.

"You need your own place," she said, and it wasn't the first time. "You've been living in this hotel for too long."

"Two months, but who's counting?" I squeezed my eyes closed, finally looking up at her. "I have an apartment."

"No, you don't. Your ex-girlfriend has an apartment, and you _used_ to live there. Emmett did go in and get your shit, though," she sighed, sitting down next to me. "The week you went into rehab, actually. Heidi was…not helpful. Just think about it. You…living here…not a good thing."

Narrowing my eyes at her, I asked, "Why?"

"Where should I start?" she countered, nudging me with her shoulder. "For one thing, the paps know you're here, and so do your rabid fans, and the hotel security is tired of dealing with them, despite the fact that they're paid well for it. The fuckers down there also know you and Heidi broke up due to the accident. And I know you; you need a space of your own to decompress. If you want, I'll start looking. Or you can stay with Em and me. You'd have the whole third floor…"

I waved her away, feeling a bit bitter about Heidi – though that may have been my pounding head – but grateful to my brother for grabbing my stuff. Sighing, I realized my family always seemed to be cleaning each other's messes. However, it wasn't even the loss of the relationship that irked my ass, but the loss of my place, not to mention the way she'd done it. She'd waited until I was in rehab before telling Rose that we were done, that I would ruin her career as an actress. Though, really…she was a glorified model and obviously a coward. She couldn't even say that shit to my face.

The thought of my own place, though, was starting to sound good. And despite the fact that I felt like squashed roadkill, the memory of a sexy little brunette popped into my head, along with her "For Rent" sign.

"No, Rose," I sighed, shaking my head to clear it of Bella Swan. "I'll um… I'll figure something out. I've got a few days before we get busy recording."

"Whatever. Just let me know. You're paid up here until next week, but…"

Nodding, I rubbed my face and raked a hand through my hair. I needed the aspirin to kick in, and I finally looked to Rose. "Why are you here? I didn't think I was needed until next week at the studio."

She narrowed her eyes dangerously at me, and I scanned through my foggy head, trying to remember what I'd done wrong. I didn't think I had, but sometimes I caught hell for the simplest shit. She pulled out her phone, shoving it into my face.

I blinked away sleep and beer fog to see what video she was showing me. Grimacing, I watched in disgust the ambush of the paps from the night before; even better was the escape I'd done into Charlie's Pub.

"Really? I asked Tony to take you straight to your hotel," Rose said with a dangerously raising voice.

"And he did," I argued petulantly. "But…"

"But what?"

"But I decided to get some air, Rose. I'm not a child. I can handle a few paps."

She pursed her lips at me, but the deadly narrowed eyes didn't stop staring at me. "And where'd you go after that? Because the paps lost you."

Grinning with pride, despite my slightly dulling headache, I said, "I never left that bar."

She snorted. "Well, that explains the hangover."

"What difference does it make? Honestly? Masen is a drinking, womanizing, drugging asshole, right? I mean, who gives a shit if he's two fucking months out of rehab and back in a bar?"

Her anger melted away in an instant. "No, no… I just… Edward, if you get trapped or ambushed, I just… I know you hate it. I would think you'd avoid it."

"I did," I said with a harsh laugh. "Though, the girl at the bar helped."

She laughed, reaching over to ruffle my hair. "Did she now?"

"It's not like that," I sighed, shaking my head at her knowing look and ignoring her teasing grin.

Sure, I'd been there, done that in the past – especially when we'd first started gaining attention – but it had been a long time. A guy in his early twenties had a near constant hard-on, so with women falling at his feet, it was hard to fucking resist. But I'd been faithful to Heidi for the year we'd been together, even with touring all over the damn world, though I was damn sure Heidi hadn't been so loyal.

"No?"

"Nah, I'm not…James." I laughed, nudging her shoulder with mine.

"Now that's true," she chortled, rolling her eyes. "Hell, even before Heidi you weren't all that bad."

"Nah, that's not…me."

"I know." She took a breath and let it out, finally standing up from the bed. "I was just curious what you did last night. I was worried about you when you left the arena."

"I had a few beers, waited out the paps, Rose. That's it! I swear."

She chuckled. "Fair enough." She started to turn away from me but stopped. "By the way, don't forget you have to be across town tonight by seven."

Frowning, I nodded as I glanced at the clock. I'd slept well into the afternoon, but I had a few hours to kill before then. "Right, got it."

"Okay." She reached the door of my hotel room and then turned to face me. "I also haven't forgotten about those leaks. I'm looking into it as we speak, or should I say…Emmett is. Someone's running their mouth about shit, and I wanna know who."

"Good. Let me know."

"I will. And Edward, for the love of God, let them clean this fucking room."

"What?! It's not that bad!"

She yanked open the door and stole the damn "Do Not Disturb" sign, tucking it away in her purse. "You'll get this back in a day or two, and I'm telling them to send a whole damn team up here."

"I don't know how my brother puts up with you," I yelled, shaking my head.

"Because he'd be lost without me. You, too."

The door slammed, and I sighed. "That's kinda true," I muttered, shaking my head.

The aspirin had finally started to kick in, and I glanced around the room. It was messy, with overflowing garbage cans filled with takeout containers, a few empty beer and soda cans here and there, and I could use some damn towels. Okay, so maybe Rose was right.

However, it was the acoustic guitar leaning against one of the nightstands that caught my attention. Picking it up, I reveled in the comfort and ease that it brought to me. It was my personal favorite and not one I really used on stage, though I had recorded with it once or twice. I plucked out a melody that was rolling around in my head, frowning at how Bella Swan came to mind almost at the first note. I wasn't sure what that meant, but I also wasn't sure I wanted to give it much thought.

What those few notes did do was make me want to see her again, talk to her. Glancing up at the clock, I set my guitar down. If I played my cards right, maybe I could see that apartment she had and still make it across town in time for the appointment at seven. The prospect of seeing Bella well outweighed that fucking appointment. With one last stretch, I pushed myself up off the bed and headed into the bathroom to clean up.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… I know some of you were worried about Edward's drinking versus rehab… He's clean, but you'll find out everything soon enough. ;)**

**There is a playlist for this fic on YouTube. I haven't decided whether to post just the songs I use at the beginning of the chapters, or all the songs that have been an inspiration. So far, it's the former. Anyway…the link is on my profile.**

**I'll post the usual pic teases on FB and Twitter a day or two prior to the chapter going up. The Sun/Wed posting schedule should stay pretty solid, unless something screwy happens with my RL schedule. But you'll know when I do. :) So until next Sunday… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	3. Gilded Cage

**A/N… You guys are awesome! Thank you so much! I'll let you get to it, but see me at the bottom to answer a question or two…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 3 – Gilded Cage**

_Living on a lighted stage  
Approaches the unreal  
For those who think and feel  
In touch with some reality  
Beyond the gilded cage_

_Cast in this unlikely role_  
_Ill-equipped to act_  
_With insufficient tact_  
_One must put up barriers_  
_To keep oneself intact_

"_Limelight" - Rush_

**EDWARD**

Charlie's Pub looked completely different by the light of day. I pulled my car up to the curb and turned off the engine. My eyes took in the neon signs, the darkened windows, and finally the steps in the alleyway that led up to Bella's place.

Suddenly, I realized that she may not even rent to me. Truly, I came with a lot of baggage. It was quite possible that Bella's quiet life was about to be invaded by my crazy one. Frowning down at my hands, I wasn't sure that was fair of me to do to her.

However, it was the selfish side of me that had me stepping out onto the sidewalk, setting my car alarm. The cold wind of fall that was turning into winter hit my face hard, so I pulled my wool cap tighter down onto my head before reaching for the door of the bar.

Warmth and music rushed out at me, but the smell inside was the same as the night before – beer, wood, and some sort of cleaner.

"Hoshit," a girl with bright-red hair breathed, dropping the mop in her hand to the floor. "You're…You… Do you know who you are?!" she squeaked, her finger pointing my way as her mouth hung open.

"Sometimes," I said with a chuckle.

"You're Masen! Oh my damn… I love you… I mean your shit… I mean…_music._"

Finally, I laughed out loud. "Um…thanks?"

"Can I? I mean, may I?" she asked, holding up her phone.

I was used to it, and I had to admit her flustered rambling was amusing. "Yeah, sure."

She set her phone to the camera, lining us up in the screen. She wasn't all that short, but her hands were shaking all to hell.

"Here, let me," I told her, taking it from her and clicking the picture.

"Thank you," she whispered, eyeing the picture. "Um, I'm Tori. And I've completely forgotten that I work here. What can I get you?"

Grinning, I was just about to ask for Bella when another voice hissed a curse, only this time, it was a younger boy. He had to be in his late teens, with product-filled hair and a Radiant Eclipse T-shirt on above his jeans.

"Fuck me runnin'," he muttered, and I shook my head. "Masen…"

I shot him a wave, pointing to his shirt. "Nice shirt…"

"Dude, you're…the fucking shit!" he gushed, walking to me.

"Michael Newton, you'll stop right there," I heard from behind the bar, and I grinned at the voice that had invaded my dreams the night before.

"Yeah, but…B!" he argued, pointing my way before rounding on Bella. "It's Masen! You know, from Radiant Eclipse."

"Yes, but he doesn't need you all up in his face. And you have homework, mister," she said, raising an eyebrow. "Go, scoot! Mom will be here soon to pick you up."

"But Tori got a selfie!"

Chuckling at Bella's eye roll and glare to her server, I waved it away and asked for Michael's phone. "Bella, it's fine."

She snorted but waited until the boy snapped the picture before pushing him toward the back. "And Masen doesn't need to suddenly be surrounded by fans and press, so keep that phone in your pocket, both of you." She gave them each a pointed look as Michael nodded and gave me one last look before he disappeared into the back.

"Wait, you know him?" Tori asked, gaping at her boss.

"I was in last night," I explained. "Bella was nice enough to stay open for me."

"And you didn't say anything? What good are you!?"

"Good enough to leave the ice bucket by the machine. Get to scooping, sunshine," Bella countered without batting an eye.

"Oh, we are _so_ gonna talk about this," Tori muttered, pushing her way into the kitchen.

Bella snorted but looked to me with a curious expression on her pretty face. "I didn't expect you back so soon. You have more woeful tales for me? Should I pour the beer?"

Grinning, I shook my head. "Not today. I'll take a soda, though."

"Fair enough, Masen." Her voice was calm and soothing, just as I'd remembered it, as she filled a glass for me, and I took my same stool from the previous night.

"Please call me Edward…"

Her cheeks tinged a little pink, but she nodded. "Edward it is. Now what brings you in here…not even twenty-four hours later? Are there photographers outside again?" she asked, narrowing her eyes at me.

"No," I said with a laugh, looking down at my drink before meeting those dark-brown eyes. "I need…" I glanced over at the sign that was still up in the window and pointed to it. "Is that apartment still available?"

Her eyebrows shot up, but she nodded slowly. "Yeah…" She dragged the word out but looked confused. "Why?"

"I need a place of my own. I just…this is kinda close to most everything I need…"

Bella laughed, shaking her head. "This is for _you_?" she asked.

"Yes?" I answered warily.

"Oh, hmm," she hummed, her brow wrinkling a little. "Edward, you know it's just a basic loft-style apartment. Nothing fancy or…"

"Do I look fancy?" I interrupted, tugging off my wool cap and raking a hand through the mess of my hair. I then gestured to my faded hoodie, wrinkled T-shirt, and worn-out jeans. The most expensive thing on me was my boots, but Docs were worth the money. Her giggle made me smile. "Can I at least look at it?" When she hesitated, I fidgeted. "Unless…you don't… Look, the paps the other night. It won't always be that way…just until the shit settles down from…"

Her warm hand settled over mine, which made me stop talking. "C'mon, Edward. I'll show you the place…" She waited patiently as I drained the last of the soda she'd poured for me and then led me through the back again. "We'll have to stop at my place for the key."

We turned to the left out the back door of the bar, taking the steps up two flights. Stopping in front of the door she'd gone in last night, she looked back at me before opening it. The apartment was an open plan but definitely decorated by a woman, with soft colors, even softer materials, and areas defined by bookcases and low walls.

Michael gaped from the kitchen table. "B?"

"Homework, Mike. Not kidding," she reiterated. "And when Mom gets here, let me know. I'll be upstairs in the empty apartment."

He looked like he had a million questions on his tongue, though a deviant smile crossed his face, which made Bella roll her eyes. She walked to an office set up in the far corner of the apartment, pulling open a drawer with a manila envelope.

When she led me back out the door, Mike called out, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

I grinned but glanced over at Bella, whose eyes narrowed dangerously again, but her snark back was hilarious. "That doesn't leave much, Virgin Mary."

"Oh, not cool, B. Not cool at all!"

She smirked my way when I laughed. "Little brother?" I asked, remembering the ways I'd tortured Emmett our whole lives as the obnoxious younger sibling.

"Yeah," she sighed, but she was still wearing a small smile. "Well, half-brother. My mother was young when she had me, and she'll tell you dumb, too, just simply because she got wrapped up in my dad's world. He loved her, but that wasn't enough for her. She got married not long after they broke up for the millionth time. Mike's dad was the polar opposite of my dad – banker, boring, stable – which is what she wanted, I guess. Mike came along when I was seven. He's a good kid, smart, and he got wrapped up in the divorce when his dad went through a mid-life crisis. However, Mike's dad got really sick and passed away before the divorce was final. By then, I'd moved out of my mother's home and started college, and Mike stayed with me a lot. He was about eleven when it all went down.

"My mother remarried again, and this time, it was a younger guy. Phil treats her really well, but he and Mike are like oil and water. So he comes here after school." She sighed, shaking her head as we reached the door of the top apartment. "He listens to me, and I can get him to focus on school, rather than fighting my mother over his extracurricular activities." She grinned up at me. "My dad loved Mike. Occasionally he'd come with me on visits, even though he wasn't blood related. And Mike…well, he fell in love with music. Drums, specifically. And my mother hates it. Personally, I think he's good, so I let him practice down in the bar before we open."

"What's he play?"

"Your stuff, mainly, though he likes just about anything rock or metal. I pay for his lessons, just to piss my mother off."

I laughed, shaking my head. "Your mom sounds like my parents. They didn't want me to pursue music – well, not my kind, anyway. They'd have been happy if I was playing piano in a monkey-suit in front of a bunch of stuffy people."

Bella simply shook her head with a smile and opened the door. "This is it." Her voice was soft, but she flipped on a light switch, only to step fully into the place. "The electric is included in the rent, along with water and trash. It's partially furnished, but I could take out whatever you don't want." She snorted, shrugging a shoulder. "Really, I just store some things in here 'cause it's easier than moving them down three flights of stairs."

Nodding, I walked around the place. It was just like she'd said – an open loft, almost industrial. There was a wall of brick on the right side, the kitchen was open and simple, and there was a bathroom in the far corner. Partially furnished meant a table and chairs in the kitchen, a couple of sofas in the middle, and an old upright piano tucked away in the corner by the brick wall.

The far side of the room was all windows, letting in natural light – as much light as a cold, overcast day in Seattle would allow in. The view was of the street, and I could see my car down below.

"I can take the piano out if you want," she muttered, pointing to it. "Honestly, I don't know how my dad got it up here."

Chuckling, I shook my head. "Wait, this was your dad's place?"

"Yeah," she sighed, smiling warmly as she nodded a little. "I grew up here, but when I was accepted into college, he gave me the floor below to get away from Mom in order to have privacy to study. When he died, the whole place became mine." She wrinkled her nose, looking around. "I told you it wasn't much…"

Frowning, I shook my head at her. "It's kinda fucking perfect," I said softly, but her facial expression seemed to scream that she was uncomfortable. "Do I make you nervous asking about this, Bella?"

She shook her head. "No, I just… M-Mase… Edward, you could live anywhere… Why here?"

I gestured toward the kitchen table, and we sat down. I wasn't sure I could explain this in a way that didn't make me sound like a loser or an asshole. Shoving my sleeves up, I rested my elbows in front of me.

"I, um…I'm living in a hotel, Bella. I was born and raised in Seattle, but I'm staying at the hotel right around the corner. That's not for…any reason other than I lost my place to live when I went to rehab. If I left it up to my manager, who also happens to be my sister-in-law, she'd have me living with her and my brother…or somewhere expensive, where my neighbors would eyeball me like a fucking criminal, despite my career and bank account. I can't live with my parents; that'll never fucking happen again." I sighed, yanking off my wool cap and gripping my hair. "I need a place of my own. Radiant Eclipse is about to start recording a new album, and the studio is only a few blocks over. I _hate_ people – the media and the fans – knowing where I am, simply because…I have to act a certain way in front of them. I need a place that's private, that's hidden away, a place I can write music and decompress. I need a place I can be _me_."

"And it'll be just you on the lease?"

My brow wrinkled at that question, and for a moment, I wondered if that was her subtle way of asking me if I was single. Again, I couldn't blame her for being nervous, because what people knew about me was pretty much all lies.

"Just me. Promise." I sighed wearily, rubbing my face. "Bella, I'm…not what you see on TV. Masen is kind of an asshole, but it works on the stage. It keeps things…interesting, and it keeps the record label happy. Edward, on the other hand, is fucking boring."

That made her smile a little. "I doubt that, Edward."

"I'm not kidding. I don't throw parties, I don't have friends over at all hours, and if I do, it's because we're writing…and usually, that's just me and Jasper. Personally, the only thing I'm doing late at night is eating a bowl of cereal and watching reruns on TV." I shook my head at how sad that sounded. "I really like this place, Bella. It's open and off the beaten path. I'm close to my new favorite bartender."

She snorted, rolling her eyes, but her cheeks blushed a little at my silly smile. She toyed with the manila envelope on the table, and I covered her hand with mine.

"Bella, ask me anything, and I'll answer as best I can. I want you okay with this, and if by the time I answer your questions, you're still not okay…then I'll move on to someplace else."

She took a deep breath. "Okay, then…rehab. Did you really go?"

"I did. I was in for a month," I told her honestly, though there was way more to the story than that.

"And you lost your place because of it?"

Chuckling humorlessly, I nodded. "It's not a secret that I was dating Heidi Summers and we'd been together for a year. We met on the set of one of our videos, which she was in, and we started dating. She's an actress and model, and she liked being _seen_ when we were out. But I toured…_a lot_. And so we got a place together, and even though I was gone for quite a bit, at least I had a place to come home to." I shook my head slowly. "There was a car accident," I continued, wishing I could elaborate. "I was taken in on a DUI, and when the judge ordered rehab, Heidi was…embarrassed, telling my manager, Rose, that she needed to get my shit out of her place. That I was going to ruin her career."

"Wait… She didn't even break up to your face?!"

Laughing, I said, "No."

"That must've hurt."

"Not as much as you'd think. Though, I had suspicions that she was cheating with her co-star…the one she's with now."

"Did you?"

"Cheat!?" I gasped, and she nodded. "God, no. I was too damn busy, and I thought we were cool, but apparently…no."

Bella frowned at that, muttering something about stupid women, which made me chuckle.

"Heidi's all about Heidi, Bella. That's on her. And honestly, she was a bear to live with – moody and shallow and whiny. Feel free to tell everyone that about her…"

I smiled at her giggle, and I suddenly had the urge to tell her that Heidi didn't have anything on Bella. Surgery and makeup only went so far, but Bella was gorgeous, and it was natural and perfect. I shook my head at that train of thought, simply because the poor thing was still nervous and I didn't want to make it worse by flirting, though I was sad to say the flirty shit we'd been doing the night before was gone since I'd asked about the apartment.

"And the DUI?"

"What about it?"

"Are you… Is it a problem?" she asked, tilting that gorgeous head at me. "I know addicts, Edward, and you don't seem…"

"It's a long story, one not many people know. Well, they don't know the whole thing, anyway. There was a car accident, and alcohol was involved, not to mention a kid ended up in the hospital." I sighed, wishing like hell I could tell her the whole thing, but it wasn't all about me, unfortunately. There were people I had to protect. "I was lucky to have the means to hire a decent attorney – or the record company did, really. They were able to take care of the kid's hospital bills, and my…celebrity status bought me leniency. If I went away to rehab, I was able to keep my driver's license, and the only stipulation was that I attend AA meetings a few times a month for six months and pay all the costs of the hospital, courts, and insurance deductibles."

"And the child?"

"Fine. Perfect, actually. Bree is ten, and she had a concussion, a broken arm, and some scratches from the glass. And she's a huge fan of Radiant Eclipse." I grinned at Bella's chuckle. "She is. She's got a big crush on Jasper and me. We brought her to the show last night…and I'll probably do it again when we have another one here."

"Your shows aren't exactly…for ten-year-olds."

Chuckling, I shrugged. "That's true, but we kept it down a bit last night…until she left. She didn'tstay for the whole thing. You've been?"

Bella smiled and nodded, but she hesitated again. "I took Mike to a few shows. You're very…animated."

"But I'm not an addict, Bella," I reiterated. "You're right about that, and I wish I could tell you the whole thing, but it's not just about me. If you need references, I'll hand you my phone. I'll pay first, last, and every month's rent in between for that whole year's lease, but I'm tired of that hotel. Yes, I could let people do this shit for me, and I'd end up in some snobby place, but I don't like it when Rose does this stuff for me; I'm not a child, even though she means well. She'd tell you it's her job, but still…" Sighing deeply, I shrugged a shoulder. "You don't really know me, so if the answer's no, I understand. Just tell me I can still come grab a beer every once in a while."

She smiled, opening the envelope, but glanced up when there was a knock on the door. We both turned to see Mike there, backpack on his shoulder, but there was a woman behind him that had to have been Bella's mother. They shared some of the same features, except the eyes. Bella had her father's eyes. Her mother, however, looked cold, a little standoffish.

"B, I'm out. I'll see you tomorrow," Mike said, but he walked to me. "It was badass meeting you, Masen."

Smiling, I giving him a fist bump. "You, too."

"Masen, this is our mom, Renee Dwyer," he introduced me to the woman that was eyeing my ink-covered arms and hands with disdain. "Mom, this is the lead singer from Radiant Eclipse."

"Nice to meet you," I greeted, and her handshake was limp and cold, which made me smile.

"I've seen you on TV." She sniffed, waving a hand. "How do you know Isabella and Michael?" she asked, but before I could answer, Bella piped up, her voice much more stern than I expected.

"He's just about to lease this apartment, Mom, and I need to get the paperwork done."

Renee's eyes landed back on me. "Things not going so well with your…_job_?"

"I… Well, no…things are fine. This place is perfect."

"Actually, Mom, that's a rude question," Bella stated, not bothering to look up from the paperwork on the table. "His financial status is none of your concern."

"Well, I'm simply looking out for you, dear. Don't want you to rent to someone who can't pay you in a month or two. You know how musicians are."

Mike laughed, like doubled over and red-faced. "Mom, Masen could buy this whole building like forty times over…and that's just from the last album. I'm thinking paying Bella's rent isn't a problem."

Smirking, I shook my head but turned to Bella, who was watching her mother carefully. She looked pissed, but she looked embarrassed, too. In fact, she met my gaze, mouthing, "Sorry."

Grinning, I shrugged, shooting her a wink and turning back to Renee. "I assure you I can pay the rent. Plus, it's actually an honor to be living in Chainsaw Charlie's place. I'm a huge fan of his work. Maybe it'll help with our new album."

Bella let out a small giggle behind me, but Renee's face was priceless – sour and bitter.

"Hmm, indeed," she mumbled, turning to Mike, who was eating this shit up. "Come along, Michael. We need to get home. Isabella, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yes, ma'am," Bella replied softly, looking up to her brother when he approached the table. "Not a word, Mike. Respect his privacy," she said softly to him. "And tell Tori on your way out."

"Yeah, yeah…got it." Mike quickly kissed his sister's cheek, whispering in her ear before giving me another fist bump on the way by. "Welcome to the neighborhood. See ya 'round, Masen."

"Later, Mike."

The door closed behind them, and I again faced Bella, who had stood up from the table.

"You just assured yourself a spot on her shit list."

Grinning, I shrugged. "Her shit list I can handle. I'm used to reactions like hers. Your shit list, though… Different story."

She laughed, tapping the table top. "Sit down and sign this lease, Edward."

I gaped at her. "Seriously?"

She nodded with a smile, and I yanked her into a hug, which caused her to squeak in surprise.

"Thank you! Oh, sorry," I mumbled, stepping back.

I swore I heard her say, "I'm not." But she sat down, pushing the papers my way, and her face was pink again.

"Your blush is beautiful," I whispered without thinking, shaking my head.

"Stop pouring it on, Edward," she teased, waving me away and tapping the papers. "The place is yours."

"That's not…pouring it on, Bella. It's the truth."

She fought her smile but mumbled a thank you. My phone vibrated across the table, and I saw it was Rose, so I grabbed it quickly.

"Hey, Rose," I sighed into the phone, signing all the places Bella had marked.

"Just reminding you of that appointment, Edward."

"I know, I know," I said, looking at my watch before going back to my checkbook. "I'm about to head that way, but I'm signing a lease for an apartment."

"Really? Where?"

"It's right around the corner from the hotel. Right above Charlie's Pub," I told her. "Did you know that was Chainsaw Charlie's place?" I asked her, smiling at Bella's soft laugh.

"Who? Oh! The guitarist! I've heard you and Jasper talk about him. Well, give me your new address, and I'll have your things moved over. Tony needs the work until the tour. When can you move in?"

"I guess I can move in anytime," I said, looking to Bella, who was nodding as she handed me a set of keys. "I can't get you the keys until after my appointment, Rose, so tomorrow?"

"She can come see me at the bar," Bella offered. "I'll hold a set if that's what you want."

"Rose…"

"I heard her. Is this the bartender who saved you from the paps?" Rose asked with a laugh.

"Yes, and leave it alone, Rosalie. Her name is Bella, and she'll have the keys for you at the bar. Tell Tony to just dump my shit in here anywhere. It's a loft, so I'll deal with it later, okay?"

"Fair enough. You must really like this place…or is it the girl?"

"Both." I snorted, running a hand through my hair nervously.

"She pretty?"

"More than I can explain."

Rose paused for a moment. "Okay, sweetie. Just leave the moving to me, including your things at the hotel, but you gotta go or you'll be late."

"Yes, Rose," I groaned, ending the call and dropping my phone to the table. I met Bella's gaze. "I can't thank you enough, Bella. You sure you don't mind holding a key for her?"

"No, not at all."

"Don't let them overwhelm you," I sighed, shaking my head. "My brother will probably be with her. He's head of my security, but he's a huge, hyper teddy bear. Rose is very no-nonsense, but she's only looking out for me – for the whole band, actually. And Tony…he's our driver. He's big and serious but harmless. I don't have much, so they won't bug you long." I grimaced, picking up the keys she left for me. "I wish I could be here to cushion it, but…I can't miss this meeting."

Bella smiled, patting my shoulder. "It's okay. I'll handle it."

"You're a fucking angel for doing this." I laughed at her snort and handed her the check I'd written.

"I'm no angel, for sure."

Chuckling a little, I said, "Well, that's certainly interesting to know…"

She rolled her eyes but said nothing to my tease. She then opened the check, her eyes widening. "Edward, I thought you were fucking kidding about paying for the whole year."

"No, I wasn't," I stated with a shake of my head. When she tried to hand it back, I wouldn't take it. "Look, Bella… You're doing me a huge favor when you don't know me, so let that be the first step to easing some of your worry, okay? Second, I'm going to be busy the next several weeks with recording, so I'll be in and out. After that, we'll start touring. I don't want to worry about it. I don't want _you _to worry about it, and I want the security of having a home to come back to."

She frowned at that. "I wouldn't do that…just kick you out."

"Well, I hope if it comes to that, you allow me to apologize for whatever I've done."

She smiled and nodded, and we left the apartment. She followed me down the steps.

"Good luck at your meeting," she said, reaching for the back door of the bar.

"Thanks. I'll need it," I grumbled but then smirked. "Don't let them drive you crazy, angel. My cell is on the lease, so call me if Emmett or Rose get outta hand."

She giggled. "Okay."

I waited until she went in before walking to my car and getting in. I was going to have to hurry to make it on time. Traffic wasn't too bad on me, and I wound my way across town, pulling into a parking lot.

Sighing, I adjusted my wool cap, yanking the hood up on my sweatshirt, just to keep my face covered on my way to the door of the building. Once inside, I took off the hood and the cap. The one thing about AA meetings was the anonymity. My face may have been recognizable, but no one could say anything. The usual table of coffee and donuts stood in the back of the large reception room of the church. I grabbed a donut and a cup, stepping into the doorway. My eyes narrowed on the people milling about and then to the ones seated. I found who I was looking for, and he was sitting toward the back of the room.

I took a seat next to him. "Nice of you to make it this week…_Dad_."

I gazed over at him, trying to read his mood. We couldn't be more opposite. Dr. Carlisle Cullen had blond hair and blue eyes, whereas I got most of my features from my mother, Esme. Dad and I were both tall, though, with broad shoulders and long legs. At that moment, he seemed stoic, but I could see a touch of contrite guilt there, too.

"It's only fair, son."

"Fair…and I believe the stipulation I gave you."

"That, too." He sighed, sitting forward with a styrofoam cup in his hands, but he looked over at me. "I owe you this, Edward. I owe it to you, my wife, and Bree. I could've lost my medical license that night."

"You could've killed that little girl _that night_, Dad," I growled out through gritted teeth as I kept our conversation quiet. "You… You're fucking lucky that my reputation covered for your ass."

"I was lucky that you were close by."

"Hmm," I hummed, shaking my head. "Don't make me regret it."

He shook his head fervently. "You have my word, son."

We turned our attention to the front of the room when the head of the AA meeting took the podium. I sat back in my chair to listen, but it wasn't me who truly needed it. Instead, I thought about the man sitting next to me. Dad and I needed to talk, because we hadn't since I'd returned from rehab. I just didn't know if I was ready.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… So now you know who he was covering for…Dad. And most of you had guessed Edward would rent from Bella. I honestly couldn't deny him, either. LOL**

**Questions… **

**For my firefighters…No, Edward and Bella didn't know each other prior to the night he ran into her at the bar. So…your bet goes to the ones that said no. **

**Charlie… Just to clarify: Charlie died of a heart attack, and the media didn't exactly help him. It wasn't drugs or anything mysterious, just poor health, but the media could've done something. I used a little play on Princess Diana's circumstances…without the car accident, just the cold nature of the paparazzi.**

**The links for the playlist and pic teasers on FB, Twitter, and my blog are on my profile. The playlist is on YouTube, and I'm adding as I post. Next update will be Wednesday, so until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	4. I'm No Hero

**A/N… I can't thank all of you enough at the amazing things you're saying about this story. I won't keep you up here, but I will answer a question or two at the end…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 4 – I'm No Hero**

_I heard from god today, and she sounded just like me.  
What have I done, and who have I become.  
I saw the devil today, and he looked a lot like me.  
I looked away, I turned away!_

_Arms wide open, I stand alone._  
_I'm no hero, and I'm not made of stone._  
_Right or wrong, I can hardly tell._  
_I'm on the wrong side of heaven, and the righteous side of hell._

"_Wrong Side of Heaven" – Five Finger Death Punch_

**EDWARD**

"Just coffee…black," my dad ordered once we'd taken a seat in the booth.

The girl's eyes lit up with recognition when they landed on my face, but she didn't say anything.

"Same…cream and sugar, please," I ordered, and she stuttered a bit before walking toward the barista.

The coffee shop was filled with soft chatter and music, along with louder sounds coming from the machines pumping coffee out by the gallons, it seemed. I could see a few familiar faces from the AA meeting, but this place was about a block from the church, so it made sense people would come here after it was over.

I could feel eyes staring my way, but it wasn't from any of the patrons. My dad's dark-blue eyes were on me when I faced him across the table.

"Why are we here?" I asked, trying to keep the anger out of my tone, not to mention the volume down, as well.

He looked nervous, but he smiled as he glanced down at his hands. "I just wanted to talk to you, son," he said, finally looking back to my face. "I want… I need to apologize again, and then I wanted to know… I mean, was it… Did they treat you okay?"

I snorted, shaking my head. "I didn't go to _jail_, Dad," I muttered back, "at least, not after the initial arrest that night, and really, that lasted only a few hours. I'm now the proud owner of an arrest record – mug shot, fingerprints, and DUI charge included. The actual rehab was…harmless, aside from being away from everyone. I was lucky that my lawyer found some sort of…private clinic, instead of a state-run facility."

He grimaced. "It should've been me."

"Yes, it should've been, but…I couldn't let it happen, and I couldn't do that to Mom." The mention of my mother saddened me, simply because she didn't know the truth, and she probably never would. He was too chicken-shit to tell her. She blamed me, she believed the police report, and she was pissed that I'd gone to jail. "How is she, by the way?"

"She misses you," he replied, frowning. "She worried about you endlessly when you went away for a month."

"Mmm," I hummed, looking up at the waitress as she dropped off our cups of coffee.

"I don't mean to… I hate to bother you, Masen, but could I have your autograph?" she whispered, and I appreciated her keeping it down.

"Yeah, sure," I sighed, pulling a paper napkin closer and taking her pen. I scrawled my name across it, pushing it her way.

"Thanks." Her grin was excited and happy, and it made the tension at my table a little lighter. "I'll make sure no one bugs you, I promise."

Grinning, I shot her a wink out of pure Masen habit and caught her name on her shirt. "Molly? You're the fucking best!"

She giggled, turning beet red before spinning around and going back to the kitchen.

"I forgot what it was like being out with you," Dad muttered, rolling his eyes a little as he shook his head.

I shrugged a shoulder. "Can't bitch now, though, right? It saved your ass, if I'm not mistaken."

Dad had the wherewithal to look reprimanded. He and my mother had never wanted me to take this path in my life, but I couldn't stop it. Music called to my soul, as did performing. They hated what they saw of me on TV and the stage, but they couldn't deny I made a phenomenal living at it. Not only that, but I was respected in the industry, despite Radiant Eclipse's popularity. My parents knew it was all an act, a part of the image, but they didn't like it. Not that I blamed them, but it got my band where we were, so I considered it a sacrifice – one I hoped I wouldn't have to make much longer.

He sighed deeply, rubbing his face. I noted that he looked older, like he'd aged five years since the last time I'd seen him, which was the day I'd left for rehab. He'd asked if he could visit, and I'd told him no. In fact, I didn't let anyone come see me – not even Emmett.

"You have every right to be angry, Edward." He met my gaze. "I never asked you… Why? Why'd you do it? You could've said no."

"You were scared shitless, Dad. Don't you remember?" I asked, but he said nothing as I took a sip of my coffee, setting the cup down. "Had it happened any other way, I don't think I would have, but…it would've gone way beyond a DUI for you, and you know it. You were _on-fucking-call_! Had you not been paged to the hospital, had you not been so damn close to where I was, and had you not called me at that very moment, it wouldn't have worked. I told you to wait for me! And you really should thank Rose and Emmett for thinking so fucking quickly on their feet." I huffed a humorless laugh, shaking my head. "I'm not so egotistical as to think what I do changes lives, though I've been told it does by fans. But what _you do_ does. I also know that Mom wouldn't have handled all that bullshit very well – the wreck, the arrest, the little girl you put in the hospital because _you _ran a red light. She's used to explaining my actions to her friends at the country club, not yours."

Where the whole mess hardly touched my reputation, it would've ruined my parents, and I tried not to think about what might've happened had little Bree and her mother not survived that accident.

Dad shook his head. "You make more money now than you had growing up, Edward. Yet you speak of it like you hate it."

"I do hate it." My agreement came easily, but that wasn't new to him. "It's not the money itself but what it does to people, how it makes them act. I'm no better than Molly over there. She busts her ass all day, dealing with foul, belligerent people, and she has to act a part to get through it without punching some asshole in the face who got pissy because his order was fucked up." Suddenly, my mind swirled with thoughts of Bella, and I couldn't even imagine the shit she'd seen in that bar. It made me want to chug my coffee just to go talk to her, ask her that very question. "But simply because she makes a fraction of what I do, it doesn't make her less of a person. And I hated that feeling growing up. I hated that you and Mom looked down at Jasper, at Jacob…even Alec."

"We didn't 'look down' at them, son," he countered, tapping the table. "We simply wanted the best for you. We wanted you to use our resources to your advantage. They were advantages we didn't have when we were young."

"And I get that, but for a long time, you made me feel like what I wanted in life was wrong. When really, it was what I was born to do. You made me feel like a criminal, like some deviant outcast, when in actuality, it took _you_ to get me arrested," I ranted in a low tone. "I didn't come here to fight with you, Dad, and I would fucking do it again. I'd do it for Mom and Emmett, too, because you're my family, but now…helping you has tarnished my already weak relationship with my mother because she has no idea. _You_ did that. One day, you need to tell her, simply because she thinks I really am the asshole on TV."

I sighed deeply at that, but my dad's eyes fell to the table.

"You need to admit your drinking got out of hand. It went from something social, to something needed after work, to something you can't control. It doesn't make you bad, but it does make you human, because trust me when I tell you, addiction can happen to anyone, no matter what their bank account has in it. Hell, half of Mom's country club friends are addicted to pain killers or Xanax or some other shit."

I tipped back the last of my coffee, set down the cup, and slid out of the booth, dropping a large bill on the table, if only because Molly had truly kept her word about shooing people away from me.

"Edward, wait…"

I sighed but stayed standing by the table, waiting for him to say what he needed to.

"Tell Emmett we miss you both."

"You call him. He'll be shocked to hear from you, though don't be surprised at the language he uses." I turned to lock gazes with him. "Tell Mom I said hello. And, Dad…thank you…for finally coming tonight. I didn't think you'd show, but I hope you didn't do it just because it was part of the bargain – you know, I cover for you, but you seek help. One meeting doesn't mean much to me, concerning our agreement; I've been coming here since I got out of rehab – almost two months.

"I hope you try. Because next time, it might not be a minivan you hit, but a tree or a train or what-the-fuck-ever…or maybe the people you hit aren't so lucky as the last time, and at that point, it'll be beyond me to fix it. The one thing I learned in rehab is this shit is bigger than you, and you need to recognize it in order to face it head-on."

I waited until he at least nodded at me, and I hoped I'd gotten through, but if anything from being in rehab – the fucking rehab I didn't need – had sunk into my head, it was the knowledge that the addict had to want to change.

Tugging my wool cap back on and pulling up the hood of my sweatshirt, I walked back to the parking lot of the church. The temperature outside was dropping, the night was clear, and I was rather looking forward to not only going back to my new place but seeing Bella, as well. It seemed rather hypocritical to leave an AA meeting and drive straight to a bar, but like most of my life…shit wasn't always as it looked on the outside.

The drive back to Charlie's was a blur, and I blared music along the way. When I pulled up to the curb, I noted a few cars I recognized were there. I shook my head, wondering how crazy poor Bella had gotten since my friends and brother had stuck around for a few hours.

The mere thought of Bella caused a calm to settle over me, and I honestly didn't understand it. _I'd_ _just fucking met her._ It hadn't been two whole days, and I craved the sight of her. I craved the feeling of peace that washed over me when I was with her.

"You're a fucking moron, Edward," I muttered to myself, shaking my head and getting out of the car. I was an idiot for thinking I could have a conversation with my father that didn't end up in an argument. I was an idiot for forcing myself and my crazy, fucked-up world on a girl who clearly hated the media and attention – and for good damn reason, too. And I was an idiot for obsessing over Bella when we'd just met.

There was no one on the streets this time, and I wondered for a moment if Rose faked something when she moved my stuff from the hotel. Opening the door to Charlie's released a shit-ton of noise, laughter, and music.

I sighed, fighting my smile at the people inside. I saw Jasper and Alice at a table close to the stage. Alec, Jacob, and Emmett were at the bar with Rose. I didn't see Tanya and Kate, nor was James anywhere around, but Tony had the attention of a guy behind the bar I didn't know.

No one paid me any attention until Emmett shifted a little, revealing the beautiful brunette behind the bar. Brown eyes locked on me, and a smile curled up on her mouth – one that I found myself copying before I could stop it.

I slipped up beside Jacob, and his loud greeting caused everyone to look my way.

"Mase!" he slurred, gripping my shoulder. "'Bout time you got your ass here," he said with a grunt, pointing around. "This place rocks. And sweet fuck, the bartender's hot!"

Laughing, I shook my head but caught Alec's grin. "Some shit never changes," I told him. "Bastard always thinks he's whispering when he's drunk."

"Well, it _is_ entertaining," Alec agreed, shaking his head.

Bella walked up to me, her eyes raking all over my face as I pulled off my wool cap and dropped it on the bar. "Beer? Or is it soda again?"

"Beer, Bella…please," I groaned, rubbing my face before meeting her worried look. "They drove you crazy, right?"

She laughed, and it was just the sight I needed after my fucked-up night. "No, they're great. They've been busy moving stuff up three flights of stairs, so I offered them the first round, though that was…" She glanced up at the clock. "Oh, that was an hour and a half ago. They've blown way beyond that first round."

Grinning, I nodded but turned when Jake, Alec, and Tony started exchanging hundred-dollar bills.

"Fuck, I _knew it!_" Jake sighed, rolling his eyes as Alec laughed and counted his money. "That's why she didn't flirt back. Masen's already got his voodoo workin' on her."

Bella snorted, looking up to me. "Yeah, that's the reason."

I laughed, my head falling back. "Ignore them."

"Mm," she hummed with a smirk, setting my beer down. "You look…"

My smile fell from my face. "I'm sure," was all I replied, shrugging a shoulder.

"The meeting didn't go well?" she asked softly, and I knew for a fact that my brother and Rose were eyeing us from a few stools down.

"The meeting was fine; it was after that was fucked up," I answered her cryptically, running a hand through my hair.

"Well, we're neighbors now," she teased, smiling up at me. "You know where to find me."

That brought me up short. "That's true, angel. Thank you again for that."

She nodded and smiled, walking to the end of the bar, where Tony was asking for another beer.

Rose took the stool next to mine, and Emmett did the same on the other side.

"How'd it go?" she asked, pushing the spare key my way.

I pushed it back to her. "Keep it. You'll probably need it." I sighed, looking over to where Bella was keeping the others' attention. "He was there."

"Shut the fuck up! Really?" Emmett practically growled. "He seriously showed up? After two fucking months?"

"He did. And he wanted to _talk_."

"Hmm, I take it that didn't go well," Rose surmised in a wry tone.

Snorting, I looked over at her. "He apologized and thanked me, but…"

"He's lying to Mom!" Emmett hissed, and I nodded. "She thinks you wrecked his precious Mercedes, put a kid in the hospital, and that you're this…irresponsible asshole, when really…you came in and saved the fucking day."

I huffed a light humorless laugh. "I'm not a fucking hero, Emmett. I just… I wanted for one fucking second to do something to prove I wasn't the ungrateful child they think I am. We didn't turn our backs on the family just because we wanted something different in life than they thought we should have. The month in rehab was nothing compared to what he'd have gone through, what it would've done to Mom, and it was something I could pull off as…_Masen_. It fits his fucking lifestyle, according to Aro." I shrugged a shoulder but pointed to Emmett. "I'd have done it for you or Mom or Rose…because I _could_ without any issues in my life. I just…I'm dealing with every bit of it, and he shows up tonight simply because it was part of the deal. I'm not sure he's really getting help."

Rose sighed, wrapping an arm around my shoulder. "You did what you thought was best, Edward. Not everyone would've done that…parent or no. And while Aro was pretending that it was a big inconvenience, he was eating that shit up because you'll be recording soon. He'll play on your 'wild ways' soon. I'm sorry about your dad. He needs help, but I'm willing to bet your mother suspects more than she's saying."

Emmett and I looked her way.

"Mark my words." She held up a finger. "Esme Cullen is no fool. She likes to play the rich doctor's wife, and she fits in with her friends, but I'm betting she's not stupid about this. Or at the very least, she's ignoring the signs."

Emmett grunted, staring darkly at his beer. "Well, that would explain why she's so pissed. She's probably fighting it."

"I don't know," I sighed deeply, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my hands. "Anyway, he said for you to call them, Em."

My brother huffed a derisive laugh, and his smile was humorless. "Anything in particular I can call him?"

Chuckling, I shook my head and chugged half my beer before saying, "Totally your call. I told him to brace himself for foul language."

The other bartender I'd seen before stepped from the kitchen, carrying a bucket of ice. He eyed me shrewdly but poured the ice in behind the bar before coming to stand in front of me. He was a touch older than me, maybe by a few years…five years max. He had ink on his arms, broad shoulders, and he stared my way as if he were trying to figure me out with dark-blue eyes. It made me chuckle, simply because his glance over to Bella gave him away.

"I know who you are," he stated, and Rose and Emmett stiffened on either side of me.

Deciding to give into his verbal push, I held out my hand. "Masen."

He eyed my hand but finally shook it. He tried to be firm, but I made no sign that I knew what he was doing. "Garrett," he grunted. "You moved in upstairs…"

He stated it like he was accusing me of something, but I merely smiled and nodded, taking another sip of my beer. "Sure did."

"Fuck her over, and you'll answer to me, just so we're clear," he threatened, and I laughed softly, shaking my head.

If he was threatening that, it meant that Bella had kept our deal to herself. If she wasn't forthcoming with such information as the entire year's rent paid up front, then she probably wasn't as into this guy as he wanted her to be. And _that_ really made me smile, but before I could say anything, Bella stepped up next to him.

"Enough, Garrett," she stated firmly. He opened his mouth, but she held up a finger. "I think I'm good here tonight. You can go on home."

My eyebrows shot up at that, but I looked up at the guy. "Nice meeting you, Garrett."

He sniffed, nodding once. "Masen."

Bella waited until Garrett walked to the back of the bar through the swinging kitchen door, and when she faced me, her expression was apologetic. "Don't pay him any attention."

"Trust me, I wasn't."

Her grin was really sexy, but she nodded. "Yeah, well…he's good for keeping things in line on the rare busy nights, but…"

"Meh, he's just watching out for you. I get it." I waved a hand dismissively.

"Yeah, well, it's not his place anymore."

Smirking, I nodded in understanding. He was an ex, but instead of pointing that out, I simply repeated what she'd said to me. "Well, we're neighbors now. You know where to find me."

Her laugh was soft and sexy. "That sounds familiar."

I shot her a wink, and I'd completely forgotten my brother and Rose were sitting next to me. Jesus, what was it about this gorgeous bartender that caused my head to fucking swim away from everything around me?

Jasper walked up to the bar, looking excited as a damn schoolgirl. "Miss Bella…"

"Yes, Jasper?"

"Is that…" He pointed to a guitar hanging above the bar. "Is that really your father's Fender?"

"Oh, yeah," she said with a nod, dragging a bucket over in order to stand on it to pull the instrument off the hook. "Yeah, this was his favorite," she told him, handing it gingerly over.

Emmett and I laughed at Jasper's awe-filled face as he handled that Fender with more care than he would have a newborn baby, I'd have been willing to bet. Bella grinned, shaking her head in amusement.

"Jasper, you can play it. There's a Marshall on the stage. It's just behind the curtain. The guitar may need tuning, but…"

"Holy fucking shit…Chainsaw Charlie's guitar…" he gasped, spinning around to hunt down that amp.

Laughing, I shook my head. "You just made a new best friend."

Bella giggled. "Well, that was easy."

"Indeed," Emmett said with a laugh, but he got up to follow Jasper, as did Jacob and Alec. They all fumbled around the stage, and I heard the familiar pop and hum of an amp kicking on.

My empty mug was gently removed from my hand, and a new full one took its place. And I thanked Bella before she went to check on Tony.

"You like her," Rose noted, and I spun my head her way. "What? I get it. She's really pretty, Edward."

My eyes drifted to the girl in question, my head shaking slowly. "It's more than that… I can't explain it."

"You don't have to," she said with a laugh. "She's not Heidi, but be careful. Okay?"

"She's my landlord now." I grimaced, raking a hand through my hair as I turned to watch Jasper tinker with Charlie's guitar. The thick sound and distortion he was pulling out of it was amazing, but he was truly a talented bastard. He'd been that way since we were kids.

"Umm, sweetie…" Rose chuckled, nudging my shoulder with her own. "I'm pretty sure she doesn't care."

"What?!" I gasped, looking at my sister-in-law like she had three heads. "No, no…we just met. She's super sweet, and she's saved my ass twice now – once with the paps and now with the apartment. And that's in the same amount of days, Rose," I hissed her way. "I'm already too much drama. She no more wants that in her life than a root canal."

"You're an idiot."

"I know."

"No, you're an idiot because if she didn't want that shit, she'd have said no to the apartment. It's one thing to have you pop into her bar, bringing all this shit with you. It's another to have you living upstairs from her. If she didn't want it, she would've said no." She jerked her head Bella's way. "I asked her specifically when I came to get the key, Edward. I asked her if she was sure, and Emmett asked about security. She told us not to worry about any of it, that you two would figure it out." She turned my face so I was looking at her. "I read people for a living. I have to in order to do my job, and trust me, she's not a liar. She seems pretty damn stable. And…" Rose smirked. "She called you Edward."

Grinning, I shrugged a shoulder.

"Which means you really like her, doofus." She smacked the side of my face playfully. "You didn't even let Heidi call you Edward. And you dated that leech for a damn year."

My brow furrowed, but I nodded. "There's just… She's…"

"Shut up, Edward. It doesn't matter. She makes you smile." Rose's eyes softened. "Look, I knew tonight would be touchy with your dad. And I saw it all on your face when you walked in, but the second you set eyes on Bella, it melted all away. Maybe not all of it, but it certainly wasn't as bad as it could've been with you."

I sighed and nodded. "Yeah, true. I wish I could tell her about rehab… I wish… I _hope_ she doesn't see me as Masen. I've tried to hint that he's not who I really am, but I feel like I'm lying."

Rose kissed my temple. "Not yet. I'm still working on who's leaking shit. Emmett and I are the only ones who were there that night, aside from you and your dad, so it makes no sense that anyone else would even suspect anything other than you wrecking your father's car in a drunken stupor. The police report even states it."

"I know. So who, Rose?"

"I don't know. I'm sure Jasper suspects, but he'd _never_ say a fucking word. Hell, he'd never admit it if you asked him. Jake and Alec don't give a shit, and James is too damn busy with his libido. I can't think that Marcus or Tony could know. Since we weren't touring, he was back home in Los Angeles."

I nodded, thinking she was right on all counts, especially Marcus. He was our tour manager and was as laidback and easygoing as they got. He was an old rock-n-roll stoner, and he probably wouldn't have given a shit if he had known the truth.

"My guess?" she asked, wincing a little when I nodded. "Heidi."

"Fuck! Me, too," I groaned, my head falling to my hands on the bar top. My fingers gripped my hair. "I never said anything, but I think she knew my dad drank too much. She also knows that I rarely drink anything harder than beer. So if anyone would've leaked it, it would've been her."

"Yup," Rose sighed. "Well, if I have to, I'll go talk to her, but I don't think anyone will believe her. Your breakup has stirred up a shit-ton of attention – most of which is in your favor since she broke up with you when you went to rehab."

"How'd they find that out?!" I yelled, catching everyone's attention, even over the din of noise coming from the stage and amp.

Rose grinned, and it was evil and mischievous. "I _may_ have let that bit of info out myself."

My mouth fell open. "You did that shit on purpose."

"Fuck yes, I did it on purpose, brother-in-law! I had to counter the negative press over the accident with something that would swing the opinions to your favor. Heidi breaking up with you without even speaking to you was shitty and low, and I felt you needed someone to have your back."

I simply gaped at her, though I could feel Bella's eyes on me. When I turned to look at her, I heard Rose snicker softly to herself.

"I'm gonna get all these assholes out of your hair, Edward," Rose said softly. "Oh, and all your stuff is moved in. We got all of it up there – clothes, guitars, treadmill, flatscreen. You need some furniture, but I'll see what Tanya and Kate can find for you, just give me some time. The only thing we set up was your bed. Emmett insisted that we stop and get you a new mattress, simply because he said that there was no telling what Heidi had done to the one in that apartment."

Snorting, I nodded. "Ugh, I hadn't even thought of that!"

Rose grinned, patting my face. "Good luck with the rest of it, though."

I waved my hand. "I'll live. It'll give me something to do until I need to be at the studio next week."

"Yep…Monday. I'll remind you," she said, slipping down from the stool. She shot a sharp whistle to everyone in the bar. "C'mon, you've driven poor Bella crazy all damn day. Let's go."

Bella laughed as she took Rose's credit card. "Not really. They've been fun. My dad would be happy someone's playing music in here, especially on his guitar. I certainly can't."

Smiling, I sipped my beer as she gave Rose her credit slip and took the guitar back from Jasper.

Jacob, however, stumbled to the bar. "Hey, beautiful…you sure?"

"Yes, Jake, I'm sure," Bella answered without even turning around as she hung the guitar back in its place. When she stepped back down, she turned to face him. "It's a sweet offer, but I must decline."

I laughed at her politically correct decline of whatever Jacob was asking about. "Decline what?"

Alec slapped a hand over Jake's mouth. "Fuck, he's too damn loud when he's drunk. He offered to show Miss Bella here the _world_," he replied, his tone filled with sarcasm.

Jake narrowed his eyes at the laughter aimed his way. "Masen uses voodoo, I tell you. And it's not fair!"

Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes, but my gaze shot to Bella when she chuckled at him, glancing my way. "Do you?"

Winking at her, I nodded. "Oh, yeah. All the time."

She turned to Jake. "Well, there you go."

"Oh, I like her," Alice piped up from the back. "We're keeping her."

I smirked at that, especially when everyone cheered in agreement on their way out the door. I placed my money on the bar for my couple of beers, slipping off the stool.

"I can't imagine touring with them," Bella teased with a chuckle, taking the money.

I groaned. "You have no idea. C'mon, angel. I'll wait for you to close up."

"We're good." She locked the doors, shut down the lights, and we both left out the back just like the first night, though this time, we turned the same way to climb the stairs. "Good night, Edward."

"Night." I waited until she unlocked her door and opened it. She turned to wave my way, and I started to turn but stopped. "Hey, Bella?"

"Hmm?" she hummed, looking at me from the doorway of her apartment. The light around her truly lit her face up like the angel I saw her as.

"Why'd you let me move here?" I asked her. Her smile was adorable, but I wanted to explain. "I'm… Don't get me wrong; I'm so very grateful, but I was just curious, 'cause I've…I'm probably gonna fuck up and bring bullshit right to your doorstep, but I just…"

"Hey," she called, stepping closer. "Edward, everyone fucks up, and if you do, we'll deal with it. I mean…I remember what it was like with my dad – sometimes, the bullshit can't be stopped. And I don't know the answer to the question. Maybe it just felt like the right thing to do, you know?" She shrugged a shoulder, smiling my way.

Something about that answer made my cheeks feel hot, but I nodded as I backed up the steps. "Well, thank you again, Bella."

"Mmhm," she hummed. "Or maybe it's the voodoo."

I barked out a laugh as her giggle could be heard even as she closed her door. "Yeah, that's it." I muttered, turning to head to my apartment to see just how much work I had ahead of me.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… So you know a little bit more about Carlisle…and the accident. There's a bit more to it, but that'll come soon enough. And our couple is back to flirting again. :D**

**Questions:**

**Who's Bree? She was in the other car. No, she wasn't riding with Carlisle. She was in the minivan with her mother when he ran a red light.**

**Will there be any of Bella's POV? Yes. In fact, she's up next. While I mainly use Edward in this one, she will take the occasional chapter. So you'll actually see her next update.**

**I need to thank everyone that voted for **_**Masen Manor**_** for Fic of 2014, and for **_**Rain Must Fall**_** for Jan 2015. I came in first for both, and I can't thank you guys enough. Truly!**

**You can find the link to the MBtM playlist on my profile, and the pic teasers are on FB, Twitter, and my blog. I'll see you guys on Sunday. Until then… Mooches, Deb :)**


	5. So Wild, So Free

**A/N… Lots of opinions and theories. I'll say this…we're only a few chapters in, so try to keep that in mind. I'll address a few more things at the bottom, but for now…let's finally hear from Bella.**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 5 – So Wild, So Free**

_I'm outa luck, outa love__  
Gotta photograph, picture of__  
Passion killer, you're too much__  
You're the only one I wanna touch__  
I see your face every time I dream__  
On every page, every magazine__  
So wild so free so far from me__  
You're all I want, my fantasy_

"_Photograph" – Def Leppard_

**BELLA**

_Buzz, buzz, buzz…_

_Buzz, buzz, buzz…_

Groaning from beneath the covers, I slapped a hand around on my nightstand to shut my phone off. I couldn't imagine who kept calling me. Most everyone I knew respected the fact that I worked late and slept in the next day.

The buzzing stopped, and I sighed in relief, sinking back down into the heaven that was my bed, only to growl when my cell started to vibrate across the wood again.

"Dammit," I grunted, sitting up and snatching my phone. I read it through blurry vision and with only one eye before swiping my finger across to answer. "Are you dying, Mother?" I rasped into the damn thing, rubbing my face.

The derisive scoff came across the line just as clearly as if she'd been standing at the foot of my bed. "Obviously not, Isabella," she answered. "I was just checking on you."

Rolling my eyes, I fell back to my pillow. "Mom, I see you every time you pick Mike up, but I closed last night, so I need—"

"You keep awful hours, dear," she sighed deeply. "I wish you'd let someone else take that terrible place."

Smirking, I shook my head. "Yes, I'm aware of your feelings on Dad's bar, but I happen to like it."

"You're a college graduate, Isabella. You have a Bachelor's Degree…though it's not too late for you to go for a Master's or finish what you started. You wanted to be a psychologist."

"I'm aware, though I listen to people's problems all the time, so really…I already am." I grinned to myself, simply because she hated it but couldn't do a damn thing about it.

"Speaking of problems… How's that singer boy…that new tenant doing? Is he paying his rent?" she babbled, and I could hear the disdain in her voice.

"He's perfectly fine, Mother. In fact, he's no problem at all," I told her honestly, though I kept the fact that Edward had paid the entire lease up front to myself. I did my best to keep my mother out of my business – both professional and personal.

"He hasn't thrown any wild parties…or gotten high on drugs or…"

"Mother!" I scolded, shaking my head at how prejudiced she was when it came to people in the music business. "No! Of course not! In fact, I hardly see him. He's very busy, and when he's home, he's quiet."

It was the truth. Edward moved in – or rather, his friends moved him in – just shy of a month ago, and aside from the occasional late-night beer he'd grab in the bar when I'd close or bumping into him on the stairs coming or going, I rarely saw him. He looked exhausted most times…and stressed the hell out. The most noise he made in the apartment above me was his unpacking that first weekend, the treadmill he ran on just about every other day, and the soft sound of music. It was the latter that I loved the most, because it wasn't the radio or iPod but his own hands making music. He'd tuned my dad's old piano and was using it to write music, but he'd also use his guitars – both acoustic and electric. The only visitors he had were his brother, Rose, and Jasper.

"Just you wait, dear… Soon, there'll be women coming and going, drugs, booze, and parties. He'll probably ruin that place…"

"Mom!" I interrupted her rant, rubbing my face again and pulling my hair from my face. "Was there something you needed this damn early? Or did you just call to hate on my new neighbor?"

"Yes, Isabella, there was. Phil has an accountant conference coming up this weekend in New York, and Michael still has school, so we were wondering…"

"Yes, he can stay with me," I answered her before she could actually ask, if only to finish up the call. "I'll get him to school and make sure he eats more than just pizza and burgers."

"We're also going to make a long weekend of it, but I'd rather you stay here, Isabella. I just don't know about that new neighbor… Michael thinks he's the best thing since sliced bread, but I don't like it."

My eyes closed as I fought my temper with her. "Mother, I have a job to do; I'm not just going to shut everything down to babysit at your house for five days, simply because of your irrational hate for musicians. And Mike comes here every damn day after school. He's almost eighteen! Does he really need a babysitter?" I argued, simply because I knew what it was like to feel smothered by her. In fact, at Mike's age, I had a car, a job, and was mostly living beneath my dad. She wouldn't let Mike have any of those things.

"It's not irrational."

"No, it's sour grapes over Dad," I snarked back, feeling cranky at the direction this had gone so early in the damn morning. "Send Mike here. I'll keep an eye on him, but I'm not closing up my bar to spend the weekend at your house. No."

Mom sighed impatiently, but she didn't have a choice. "Fine. So I'll send him with his things tomorrow night and pick him up after school on Monday afternoon."

"Yeah, that's perfect," I mumbled through a long, wide yawn. "I'm going now, Mom. You guys have a safe trip."

"We will," she replied, and we said our goodbyes and ended the call.

I tossed the phone back onto my nightstand and fell back to my pillow. However, the gentle thumps overhead made my eyes drift up. Edward was running, the mere idea of which made me groan as my imagination took over – sweatpants, shirtless, swirls of ink on pretty skin and toned muscles. Not that I'd personally seen him shirtless, but he wasn't exactly a secret, considering he'd end up on stage or show up in magazines without a shirt.

"Fuck," I growled into my pillow.

I was ridiculously attracted to him, and it had all started the night he stumbled into my bar just as I was about to close. It was more than _who_ he was. Masen, the lead singer of Radiant Eclipse, was hot and talented and sexy, not to mention confident to the point of cocky. There was no denying it. However, the man I'd served beer to that night was not him. I'd seen the band live. Mike had begged me to take him to every local concert. They were heavy and put on a good show, and the second I'd laid eyes on Masen, I thought he was the prettiest thing I'd ever seen. _Edward_, though, was different. The man off the stage was polite and sweet, private and slightly awkward, and he was also funny and flirty.

But his eyes told his story. They were deep green, surrounded by beautiful long eyelashes, and they were filled with sadness, like he'd seen things he couldn't _un_-see.

It was his eyes that reminded me of my dad – not in color but in how they looked slightly haunted. Chainsaw Charlie had been a legend in Seattle, even before the Seattle music scene had become something all its own. My dad, however, was not the person his fans knew. He was a free spirit and a poet and my best friend. He'd told me once that my mother was the love of his life, but he knew he couldn't be what she wanted, so he let her go. He'd also told me that I was what tied him to this earth.

I'd adored my dad and more than once had begged him to let me live with him, but he never relented until I had been accepted into college. He knew he couldn't be a fulltime father, but he also knew that my mother needed me, too, even after Mike was born.

It was my memories of my dad that had me helping Edward that night and again the next day when he showed up asking about the apartment. He'd seemed to be floundering so badly that I couldn't stop myself. Plus, it irritated my mother something awful. Though, I hadn't been lying to him when I'd said I hated the press, those vultures that stalked celebrities for no other reason than to pry into their private lives. They were the reason my dad was no longer here; had they just stopped hounding him for _one fucking moment_, he might have survived his heart attack.

Something about Edward – not Masen – made me want to keep him safe, protected. And so far, it was working. No paparazzi had shown up to bother him, but he had mentioned that they'd taken to hanging around the studio when Radiant Eclipse went in for their recording sessions.

The steady yet soft thumping of his feet on the treadmill was so rhythmic that it was almost hypnotic. I was hoping it would lull me back to sleep, but after the argument with my mother, I was still a little prickly. With a scowl, I got out of bed and padded into the bathroom. Then, I figured a cup of hot chocolate or something would settle me back down for another few hours of sleep.

I opened my fridge, groaning at the empty milk container. "Fuck, it's like Murphy's Law day or something…" Glancing around my kitchen, I finally relented to trudge down to the bar for milk.

The weather was chilly, with endless gray clouds above, when I peeked out the window. I pulled on boots without tying them, tugged on my thick hoodie, and grabbed my keys, but I paused at the door when I heard voices – female voices – heading up the stairs to Edward's apartment.

Peeking out the window, I saw two gorgeous women taking the stairs. They were blonde and perfect and built like models, and even in jeans and heavy sweaters, they looked like they'd just stepped off a runway. They also looked so damn familiar. Spinning to my kitchen table, I picked up the magazine lying on top of my mail. _Music Mania Magazine_. I'd been getting the damn thing for years, if only because they'd done a big tribute to my dad after he'd passed away.

I eyed the cover, shaking my head at a gorgeous picture of a shirtless, ink-covered Edward – or really, Masen, if only because he exuded sex and drinking and rock music in the photo. The running stopped overhead when a knock pounded on his door just as I found the article. It was a quick interview, but it was the pictures I wanted. Shots of him drinking a bottle of Jack, of his playing on the stage, and sitting in his dressing room, but it was the one where he had his arms around two women that I'd remembered. And it looked like the same two that had just gone upstairs.

I slapped the magazine back down on the table as I heard laughter and squeals and loud voices above me, but I couldn't make out what was said. Something about that bugged me, and really, it shouldn't. I wanted to blame the interruption of sleep, of my argument with my mother, or even the fact that I had to brave the cold to go downstairs to raid the bar's fridge for milk, which only served to remind me that I needed to get groceries in my apartment before Mike came to stay the weekend. I shouldn't blame it on anything other than my pissy mood, because to blame it on the fact that the sounds upstairs made my stomach clench would be stupid. Edward was free and clear to do whatever he wanted. Or whoever, and that thought made me rub my face.

When another round of giggles met my ears from upstairs, I grabbed my car keys instead of the ones for the bar.

"Fuck it," I sighed, tucking my wallet and phone into my hoodie before pulling my hair up into a ponytail and walking out the door.

If I thought the store would help me get my head straight, I was wrong. Shopping wasn't my favorite chore, and more than once did I text my brother to ask if he wanted anything specific. I'd been gone about an hour and a half when I pulled back in, only I parked in the alleyway in order to unload the bags easier.

Loading myself down, because I was obviously a glutton for punishment, I started up the stairs.

"Jesus, Bella…" I heard from above me, watching as Edward practically tripped to get down to me. "You want some help?"

"No, I'm okay," I sighed, pausing in front of my door when I realized full hands meant I couldn't unlock my apartment.

"Liar," he said with a chuckle, and I noted that I'd been right about the sweatpants, but he'd apparently pulled on a zip-up hoodie. The sight of ink peeking out of the top of the zipper made my mouth water. "Where's your keys, angel?"

Sighing, my head fell back. "It's simply not my fucking day," I mumbled.

"Then let me help," he urged, the laughter dying in his voice, but his face was so damned sincere.

"Front pocket," I finally told him, glancing down to my hoodie.

"I hope you're not ticklish, or we'll both be wearing raw eggs," he teased, but he moved slowly and carefully as he reached in to take my keys out of my pocket. He slid the key in and pushed open my door. "Is there more in the car?" he asked when I set all the bags down.

"Yeah." I nodded, starting to go for another trip, but his hand landed gently on my shoulder.

"I'll get it."

"Edward, you don't have to…"

"I know," he said, giving me a half-smile that probably ranked nuclear on the hotness scale. "I _want _to."

My mouth opened to ask about his visitors, but I snapped it closed, nodding once to him, and he was back out the door. I did my damnedest not to look at his ass in those sweats, but I failed miserably.

He was back in no time with an armload of bags, setting them down on the floor with the rest. "You plannin' a party?" he asked with a laugh, but I shook my head. "One more load, I think."

"Thanks."

"No worries."

He was back one more time, carrying the last of the groceries and the one thing that made me snort softly – my gallon of milk.

"What?" he asked, setting it down on the table.

"Nothing, it's just been a shitty morning," I mumbled, shaking my head. "I got woken up too damn early, and I was out of milk, so…"

"Did we wake you? Shit, Bella, I'm sorry. I told them to keep it the fuck down." He gripped his hair. "Hell, they're still up there. They kicked me out of my own apartment."

I raised my eyebrows at that but hid my grimace in the fridge when I started putting stuff away. "No, you didn't," I answered him without looking his way. "My mother was kind enough to do that. I couldn't get back to sleep, and I thought hot chocolate would help, but then I was out of milk. And _that _only reminded me that I needed to fill my kitchen because my brother is staying the weekend with me. It simply snowballed from there…as you can see." I gestured to all the bags, rolling my eyes before going back to putting stuff away.

His chuckle was soft, but so was his expression. "You promise it wasn't us? Tanya and Kate can be a little…exuberant."

"I heard them, but no."

A heavy thump and then a long drag sounded above our heads, and we both paused to look up.

"Um, Edward?" I asked. "You…um, have two pretty women in your apartment, doing something…noisy. What exactly are you doing here?"

His laugh was loud, and I was damned sure he snorted once or twice. "Believe me, you don't want to get in their way. Rose had them find furniture for me. Tanya is Rose's cousin…and personal assistant. They brought it over, and when they saw I had stacks of shit every-fucking-where, they told me to stay out of the way. I offered to help carry stuff, but…they'd brought movers. Once all the furniture was up there, they kicked me out."

"Aw…" I chuckled, shaking my head. "Then, sit. I still want my hot chocolate. Want some?"

"Yeah, that'd be great."

As the milk heated on the stove, I finished putting away the last of my groceries. "You know what's sad? Most of this food will be gone by the time my brother leaves."

Edward grinned and nodded. "Boys can put away some food. I don't know how my mother survived Emmett and me growing up."

When I glanced up from the pot on the stove, I saw that dark sadness cross his face again as he glared at my table. But it turned into something akin to anger when he caught sight of the magazine that I'd left open to his interview.

"Umm, Bella?" He held up the page. "Did you think… Are you… They aren't… _Fuck_!" He gripped the magazine, getting up from the table and holding that page in front of me. "It's bullshit, angel. It's a motherfucking illusion. I've known Tanya for years; she used to date Emmett…until she _came out_." He leaned on the words, raising the sexiest damn eyebrow up at me until I registered what he meant. "Kate's her _girlfriend_. They do shit like this for me to…swat away the fans or clingy journalists…or whatever. Tell me you didn't think…"

"Oh," I whispered, nodding a little as I stirred the cocoa, sugar, and warm milk into two mugs. "It's none of my business…"

"Angel, I'm not… They'd kick my ass for even suggesting it. They don't do…dick." He grinned at my snort. "Actually, I'd fear for mine if it was anywhere near them."

Giggling, I pushed him back toward the table, taking the magazine and closing it. I tossed it to the counter. "Sit, Edward," I told him, handing him a mug and taking the seat across from him, but he'd already stolen the magazine back, simply due to his long reach. "You hate it."

"Hm?" he hummed, looking up from the cover. "Sometimes." He shrugged a shoulder. "The end justifies the means, I guess. If I can keep the interviewer focused on the band and music and not my personal life, it's a win for me. Like this one…" He set the magazine down, wrapping his hands around the mug, but that dark look was back on his face. "That bottle of Jack?" He tapped the cover. "That was tea."

Grinning, I shook my head before sipping my cocoa. "Fair enough, Edward," I told him, mentally smacking myself for believing what I'd seen. More than one time he'd told me that what he was on TV and in public was one thing, where he was something completely different in real life.

"So your brother's coming?" he asked, pushing up the sleeves on his hoodie, and there was a part of me that wanted to follow every line and swirl of ink, from his hands to his shoulders…and beyond, if I was being honest with myself.

Nodding, I said, "Yeah, my mother and stepfather are going out of town. If Mike bugs you, you tell me. You're his fucking hero, so I know he's gonna be itching to talk to you again."

Edward chuckled. "It's fine if he does. I've got a recording session tomorrow, but I'll be around here this weekend, and then next week we fly out to L.A. to meet with our tour manager and a director or two for some videos." He waved his hand at that dismissively. "Then it's back here to finish up the album."

"You weren't kidding."

"About?" he asked with a grin.

"Being busy."

"I wish I was kidding, but no, it's a crazy schedule. It'll get worse when we go on tour. I'll be gone more than I'm home." He shook his head, his eyes falling from my face to his mug.

"How long?"

"Who the fuck knows… Six months to a year?" He shrugged a shoulder. "We'll see when we talk to the tour manager in L.A. Though, Marcus is pretty laidback, and he likes to break in between legs of the tour, so like…we'll do the East Coast of the U.S., then break for a week or at least a few days. We'll work the Midwest and then break before the West Coast. It's overseas that can truly kick our asses."

Grimacing at the mere thought of all that travel, I shook my head but looked his way. "Well, let me know. I'll watch your place."

His smile was sweet, and he looked like he was about to say something, but the sound of women's voices met our ears.

"Tanya, he wouldn't just disappear. His damn car's still here."

Edward snorted, holding up a finger. "Excuse me, angel…before they put my picture on a milk carton."

He pulled open my door to reveal the two women I'd seen before, but this time, my vision wasn't clouded by my grumpy mood or loss of sleep. I saw matching rings on their fingers, not to mention they were holding hands. The taller of the two pointed Edward's way.

"See? Not missing."

"I said get out of the way, Edward, not run the fuck away," the shorter one fussed. "Do you wanna see what we did or what?"

"I didn't run away, Tanya," he sighed, but I could see the hint of his smile. "You said I'd only screw up what you were doing…" That made me laugh, and he shot a sexy-as-hell wink over his shoulder. "It's probably true. Don't tell them that."

Two blonde heads rushed to the doorway on either side of him, but his hand slammed heavily to the doorjamb, and his arms flexed to hold them back. His forearms rolled with the muscles as he kept them outside the door.

"Don't bug her!" he snapped, shaking his head. "She's already dealing with my bullshit enough…"

"Edward," I chided, laughing a little, if only to cover up just how disturbingly sexy that was. Something about his tone, his fierce protection, and the fact that he'd rather drink cocoa with me and unload groceries than to arrange his own place just about made me break into a sweat.

"You've been warned, angel. That's all I'm sayin'." He stepped back when I got up from the table.

"Jesus, Edward, you act like we're about to mug her or something," Tanya scolded, rolling her eyes, but she held out her hand. "You _must_ be Bella. I'm Tanya Denali, and this is my girlfriend, Kate Barns. We're Edward's Do-Bitches."

He smacked his forehead. "No, you're Rose's Do-Bitches."

"Which usually means _you_." Kate poked his stomach.

I laughed, shaking both their hands. "Nice to meet you both."

"Wow…you're as pretty as Edward said," Tanya whispered, her mouth hanging open a little.

"Okay, time for you to shut the fuck up and get out before Bella decides everyone I know is insane," Edward sang, spinning both girls around by their shoulders to march them up the stairs. "Let's go see what you did, if it'll get you out of here."

"What? We're merely agreeing…"

I felt my face heat with the knowledge that he'd told these girls I was pretty, but Tanya came to abrupt halt in front of him, almost taking them all down the stairs.

"Wanna see, Bella? I mean, it is _your_ place."

Poor Edward sagged, his head falling forward, especially when Kate giggled.

"Sure!" I piped up, and Edward's gaze snapped to mine. "C'mon, I'd like to see what you've done with the place."

"O-Okay," he sputtered, wide-eyed and shocked.

We all went up the last flight of stairs, and Edward opened his door, letting us all in before he followed. My gaze drifted around the place, shaking my head slowly, but a smile spread across my face.

"Wow," I whispered.

"Right!?" Tanya squeaked excitedly. "He has the perfect amount of space, and with such an open plan… Easy-peasy."

They'd done an amazing job. When I'd shown the apartment to Edward, it had a few things left in it – my dad's old piano, a couple of couches, and a kitchen table and chairs. Now…everything was situated into sections. And it almost seemed like there were low walls separating different things, though it was really bookcases and furniture doing the job. The brick-wall side of the apartment had his bed with my dad's piano off to the side, and that all blended easily into a living-room area, which utilized my dad's couches. A few guitars were leaning against the window sills on either side of a small Marshall amp. Bookcases lined the walls, and my eyebrows shot up at award after award that lined several shelves. I saw Grammys, MTV, and even some I didn't recognize. Tucked away between the kitchen that had way too many pizza boxes stacked up and the bathroom was the treadmill I heard just about every morning.

I glanced up at Edward, smirking at his nonchalance. It was a typical guy behavior. As long as men had a place to eat, sleep, and watch TV, I wasn't sure they gave a shit about the esthetics.

Tanya caught his look, rolling her eyes and grabbing his shoulder. "Relax." She started to point to different pieces of furniture. "Jeans, underwear, socks, T-shirts, sneakers, sheet music… I get that's all you care about."

Edward grinned but shrugged a shoulder. "I just need to know where my shit is, ladies."

"Well, now you know," Kate sighed, but she was wearing a smile as she shook her head at him.

"Thank you," he told them softly, stepping farther into the apartment and glancing around at everything.

Tanya shot me a wink. "No problem, Edward. Actually, it was kinda fun, and no, I didn't hide stuff. It's all pretty much how you had it at Heidi's, except without the spotlight-seeking, fame-hungry bitch attached to it."

There was a touch of nasty, blatant honesty in those words. I could see they cared for him, almost like sisters, and I could also see how they looked at each other, which made me feel pretty guilty for thinking there was something else going on. It was absolutely obvious that behind the scenes, they were all just very good friends.

My chuckle made Edward's gaze spin to mine, and he gave me a grin and a wink, but it was Tanya that sidled up to stand next to me.

"Good riddance, if you ask me," Tanya muttered, but Kate heard her and nodded with wide eyes. "He must really like you," she added softly so Edward couldn't hear, turning to face me.

My brow furrowed, but I shrugged a little because I didn't know where this was coming from.

Tanya grinned. "First, Edward only lets certain people call him by his real name. And second, the way he just about forced us out of your place tells me he'd protect you from anything. And third, _that boy_ only blushes when he truly likes someone."

"And for the record," Kate added from my other side. "He let Heidi only call him Masen."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Edward chanted, holding up his hands. "What are you two telling her!?"

"Nothing!" they sang at the same time, smiling up at him with falsely innocent expressions.

His eyes narrowed dangerously at the two of them, but the whole thing made me laugh. They were fucking hilarious.

"They were simply telling me you eat too much pizza," I lied smoothly, plastering the same innocent smile on my face as I gestured to his garbage.

"Oh, I like her," Kate sang softly to Tanya, who nodded.

"Mmmhm," Edward hummed, folding his gorgeously inked arms across his chest. "You two…out. You're bad influences."

Tanya laughed, walking to him to kiss his cheek, which he took adorably. Kate did the same, whispering something to him, and he nodded.

"It was nice meeting you, Bella," they said at the same time.

"You, too," I said before they walked out the door, but then I turned to Edward. "I owe you an apology. I thought…" I shook my head and waved a hand. "It doesn't matter. I just…"

Edward walked to me, taking my shoulders. "You owe me nothing. I'm aware of how it looked, Bella." His smile was crooked and looked to be a little nervous, but he added, "Trust me, I… There's only one…" He took a deep breath and huffed it out roughly. "You'll never see women up here except you. _You_, my angel, are welcome anytime."

There was the blush Tanya had mentioned. I hadn't really paid attention until that moment, but I started for the door, stopping when I caught sight of his kitchen again. However, my rough morning caught up with me, and a large, wide yawn escaped me before I could stop it.

"I'll be quiet, Bella, so you can get some sleep before work," Edward stated softly, stepping back a little.

Smiling, I nodded. I pointed toward the piano. "Thanks, but I like the music…"

His smile was soft and sweet, his deep-green eyes warm, but he jerked a chin toward the door. "Then go on, sleepyhead. I'll play you to sleep."

That might have been the sweetest thing anyone had ever said to me, and I smiled through another yawn as I walked out his door and down to my apartment. I stripped out of my hoodie, kicking off my shoes, and crawled back into my bed. Just as I set an alarm and my head hit my pillow, the sound of music drifted down through my ceiling. I'd expected his music, or something more rock inclined, but the first few notes of _Claire de Lune_ were impeccable and so very relaxing that my muscles actually twitched as I settled down. When the notes of something I didn't know started to play, my lids grew heavy and I felt myself drift away.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Okay, he's been living there about a month, in case you didn't catch the time-jump. **

*****IMPORTANT*****

**Actually, this isn't a question, but a statement. We are only 5 chapters into this story. And I want to reiterate… ****I am not making light of drunk driving. ****I'm going to assume – yeah, dangerous, I know – that everyone reading this story is of age, that you know your rights from wrongs, and that you realize it's stupid to drive drunk. I'm also going to assume that you can understand the difference between fact and **_**fiction**_**. This…is fiction. I write action, too, so I'm pretty sure you guys aren't shooting people, or setting off car bombs, or hell, mowing down zombies. **

**I am, however, focusing on the family surrounding an addict. It's what I know in my own personal life, unfortunately. I have been in Edward's shoes – not in as much detail, but I have experience with an addict…21 years, actually – so I do have a soft spot for him. Edward is, indeed, an enabler. He's well aware that he's an enabler, but from personal experience, it's hard NOT to be one sometimes when you love someone who is suffering. To watch someone suffer through demons, no matter how hard they try, is just this shy of pure, unadulterated torture. Sometimes, you give in. It's neither helpful, nor is it right, but it's not an easy road. I honestly don't wish it on anyone; it's simply not for the weak, that's for sure. **

**That being said, not all the details have emerged YET…and for good reason. So hang in there when it comes to legal-ese – perjury, false police reports, and worries over how they pulled off the switch. It can be done. It has been done. But trust me, I'm not making light of drinking and driving. I am writing about things that happen every day, and I'm choosing to focus on the addiction side of things. That is the path of this story, so if that's something that is a TRIGGER for any of you, then I'm not sure this story is for you. Like I said, we're only 5 chapters in, and I'm currently writing chapter 16, and all details will be revealed to you in due time. Ultimately, this story is about Edward and Bella and their relationship, in spite of the outside bullshit. **

**Edward is also **_**very frustrated**_** with his parents. He made a deal with his father, and so far, Carlisle hasn't been very…diligent in following through, so bear that in mind, as well. **

**Thank you to all that reviewed, rec'd, and chatted with me. You guys are awesome! The playlist is on YouTube, all the pic teasers are on FB, Twitter, and my blog, and the next update will be Wednesday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	6. What Do You See?

**A/N… THANK YOU to everyone that wished me a happy birthday! :D**

**So apparently… "I'll play you to sleep" just killed a few of you, along with a blushing Edward. ;) LOL Big hugs for that.**

**To each one of you that told me your story, that admitted to being a fellow "enabler," and that has suffered with an addict in your family… I SALUTE YOU! I also send hugs and mooches. I also thank you so, so much for telling me. **

**Honestly, this story wasn't meant to get all this serious, just some fun rock-n-roll with a sexy Edward that isn't all what he seems. ;) It still is that to me, so we'll continue on, okay? See me at the bottom, I answer some questions…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 6 – What Do You See?**

_Hey you, what do you see?  
Something beautiful, something free?  
Hey you, are you trying to be mean?  
If you live with apes man, it's hard to be clean_

_The worms will live in every host_  
_It's hard to pick which one they eat most_

_The horrible people, the horrible people_  
_It's as anatomic as the size of your steeple_  
_Capitalism has made it this way,_  
_Old-fashioned fascism will take it away_

_"Beautiful People" – Marilyn Manson_

**EDWARD**

The studio was a din of noise. The producer was working with James and Jacob, laying down the bass-line track of the song we were recording. Glancing up at the clock, I noted I had a few hours before I needed to head over to the AA meeting.

"Got a hot date?" Jasper teased softly, giving me his lazy half-smile as he tuned his guitar.

"I wish," I sighed, shaking my head. "AA meeting tonight."

He paused what he was doing for a second, studying my face, only to nod and go back to work. "If you like her, ask her out," he stated cryptically, picking a note and glancing back at me. "Bella. She's good people, dude."

Nodding, I smirked a little, but I didn't say anything. Bella was definitely "good people." She was more than that, and the more I saw her, the more I got to know her, the more I liked her. She was strong, independent, and kind. Even more, she was sweet and beautiful, and I'd almost fucked up the day before.

Knowing Kate and Tanya the way I did, I tended to forget how it looked – how they looked around me. I'd forgotten all about the pictures from _Music Mania Magazine_. And the look of pure disgust on Bella's face as she thought… Fuck, I couldn't imagine what she'd thought. Well, I _could_, but I didn't want to; the idea was disturbing.

Groaning softly, I sat forward, my elbows landing on my thighs and my hands gripping my hair. Jasper started picking away at a song I didn't know, and my eyes drifted over to watch him. Spinning around on the piano bench, I added to it, and he grinned and nodded. We played for a few minutes, but then he stopped.

"Not this album," he stated, frowning as he looked to the window in the control booth. "Not a fucking chance. Aro doesn't get this shit. He can have the list we've set down, but not this one."

Nodding in agreement, I whispered, "The next one is on us. That's gonna be either career suicide, or it'll skyrocket."

Jasper shrugged a shoulder. "I'm not sure I care anymore." He continued to play – this time, it was for the song we were about to record – but his voice was low and soft. "We've given Aro plenty, and this is the last album, but look at him. He's working James and Jacob. Now," he sighed, jerking a chin. "Jacob will go wherever we go, but James?" He shook his head slowly. "His ego will get the best of him, which makes him a shaky part of this band."

"Well, he wasn't part of us from the start anyway," I pointed out, pulling sheet music closer to make a change here and there. "Had Jared stuck with us, it would've been different. James is Aro's boy."

Jasper nodded again, because it was true. Jared, Jacob's cousin, had decided not to stick with Radiant Eclipse when we'd been approached by Aro back in the day. He'd played drums for us for the fun of it, but he'd had other aspirations, having been given a scholarship to Oregon State. Hell, the bastard was probably knee-deep in his residency at the hospital by now. It was what he'd wanted, and we'd respected that. James was brought in as a studio drummer, but he'd fit in okay and he was pretty damn good, so we'd kept him. Technically, though, he wasn't a part of the writing or creative process; he simply played what we told him.

Jasper and I continued to tweak the song, but we stopped when Aro stepped into the room.

"Boys, boys," he called us, wearing the slick smile he always wore when he was working. "Take a break for a moment. Let's talk."

The man exuded money and power, with expensive suits, his Rolex watch, and the fuck-awesome Aston Martin he drove to the studio every day, though he was _way_ too creepy to make even that beautiful piece of machinery look good. The man was short and pale, with his hair pulled back into a ponytail that went out of style about thirty years prior. And the fucker had a mean streak, but he hid it well. Actually, he hid it behind fake smiles and well-paid lawyers.

"I just got off the phone with L.A.," he started once we were all giving him our attention, and I waited to see which part of L.A. he'd meant. If it was Marcus, then we'd discuss the tour, but if it was the directors for the videos, then I needed to brace myself for possible idiocy. "Warren Milton has listened to the few tracks we've finished, and they have some amazing ideas for the videos."

Internally, I groaned.

"Here we go…" Jasper sighed, rolling his eyes. "Hmm, what will it be this time? Vegas? Strip clubs? Satan worship?"

I hid my laugh behind my hand. "Depends on the song," I muttered back. "Ten bucks says you probably nailed at least one of them."

He grinned, but we turned our attention back to Aro.

"They want to discuss possible strip club locations for the first release," Aro stated excitedly, clasping his hands together.

I held my hand out, and Jasper grumbled a string of obscenities as he smacked a ten into my hand.

"No strip clubs," I grunted, tucking the bill into my front jeans pocket.

"Oh, think of the possibilities, Masen," Aro crooned, smiling widely.

"No." I waved a hand, shaking my head. "First, this isn't fucking 1987, and we're not Motley-fucking-Crüe. Second, it's been done _way too much_. It doesn't even fit the damn song, which is about playing music live, paying respect to talent from before us, filling small bars with fans, and…" My eyebrows shot up, and I turned to Jasper, who was grinning up at me.

"Think she'd let us do it?"

"I…I don't know," I murmured, shrugging a shoulder. "Maybe? I mean, what's the worst she could say? No?"

"True."

"Charlie's?" Alec piped up with a grin. "God, that would be perfect! We could actually film the whole thing as a small venue show. Send out invites to—"

"Wait! I wasn't finished," Aro interrupted.

"No strip clubs!" I snapped, holding up my hand before he could say something else. "None. Fuck, aside from James, I don't think a single one of us has set foot in one in like three years. No." I turned to my band, ignoring James's glare. "Think about it, Aro. It's a cheesy idea, and you know it. But filming an entire show in an up-close and personal venue…not to mention kind of raw and unplugged. Oh, tell me you can't see DVD all over that shit…"

"But Warren—"

"I don't give a fuck what Warren Milton wants, Aro. It's a played-out concept." I stood up, starting to pack my shit up and leave, because I was in no mood for this bullshit today.

"Masen, Masen, Masen," he crooned, walking to me and placing both hands on my shoulders. "Okay, whatever you want… I'll talk to Warren, throw the idea of a small-show video his way. You seem to have a place in mind…"

"Maybe, but I'll handle it," I grunted, shaking my head. "But no strippers. I'm not fucking kidding. We'll embarrass ourselves."

I wanted to tell him I was tired of the man-whore I had to pose as in those damn videos. The mere thought of filming something like I had with Heidi a year ago made my eye twitch. It had been hot and new and sexy then, but now, the thought of pretending to have sex with someone I didn't even know made me ill.

Suddenly, Bella's gorgeous face came to mind, and I realized my want for her was nowhere near pretend. She was caring and sweet, but she was sexy as all hell, and I wasn't sure how much longer I could keep that closed up inside. I wanted to tell her, but I wanted to protect her – from myself and my world as much as I wanted to protect her from the other evils out there. I wanted to kiss her so badly that my hands shook some days, but I also wanted to play the piano every night to put her to sleep.

All these thoughts were swirling in my head when Rose finally stepped into the room. "Aro, we've got to get this track down, edited, and mixed before the guys leave for L.A. next week," she stated firmly but in a way that pulled Aro out of my space. "Plus, the producer is ready to start. He's getting a little impatient." She pointed toward the window of the sound room, and the guy was pacing on his phone.

"Fine, fine," Aro chanted, smiling up at me as he patted my shoulder. "I'm just trying to do what's best for Radiant Eclipse, son. That's all. But if you say no—"

"I do."

"So do I," Jasper added, getting up from the chair and stepping up to the amp to plug in.

"Yeah, it's a little cheesy, A-man," Alec admitted, but he was the most tactful of all of us. He shrugged a shoulder before flipping a few switches on his keyboards. "I mean, I get it. Our fan base is mainly women, but I would think we'd cater to them, not insult them. I like the small-concert idea. Can we work on that?"

Jacob pulled his bass guitar over his shoulder, saying, "We could do a whole…thing, Aro. Like interviews and backstage shit, not to mention some interactions with fans. Personally, if it was my favorite band, I'd rather see them play, talk about music and shit, not fumble around with chicks so plastic they're flammable."

Grinning, I couldn't help but snort, but I loved my boys. I had since we'd all met in high school. It had been, and always would be, about the music, not the fame.

"Damn, and I was looking forward to the strip club," James grumbled from behind his drum kit.

"What? Last night wasn't enough?" Jake taunted with a grin, ducking when James threw a drumstick at his head.

Alec picked up the stick, handing it back to James, saying, "C'mon, drummer boy… We need more cowbell…"

That broke the tension as the lot of us exploded into laughter. I could see that Aro wasn't happy about having his idea squashed, but he had no choice. He may have had control on most things – like marketing, promotion, and publicity – but we had creative control if push came to shove. I'd been lucky enough to have Rose handle that shit back when we'd first been signed. She'd told us horror stories about talents who had lost everything because they'd signed over too much control. Before we'd done anything, she'd brought her uncle in as our lawyer, and Jason Jenks was a no-nonsense bulldog when it came to contracts. And Aro hated him, which is why we kept him on speed dial.

I picked up my guitar and strapped it on, plugging into my amp. I tested a few notes, adjusted my distortion, and looked to Jasper. "Let's get this song down. I'm done with today."

Rose walked to me, smirking as Aro stepped out of the room. "It's a brilliant idea. Let me know what Bella says about using Charlie's. If she has questions, have her call me, and I'll explain how the contract would work."

Nodding, I looked down at my fret board, testing a few finger positions.

"Oh, and Edward," Rose whispered, her face fierce. "You know I sign off on all the bills – hotels, cars, _cell phones_," she said, leaning on the last thing. "I just was going over a few of them. Most are clean. Alec calls and texts with his wife, Jacob checks on his dad, and you and Emmett are pretty much the same. Guess who James has gotten chatty with…and not just lately…"

My eyes narrowed on her. "Who?"

"Heidi."

I bit my bottom lip, my temper rising to the surface. "When's his contract up?" I asked her. "I want him gone. And didn't he sign a non-disclosure?"

"Not sure, but I'll find out about all of it." She nodded once. "I know you're not heartbroken over Heidi, but…it's obvious those two are up to something. Let me see what more I find out, okay?" She ruffled my hair. "Hey," she said firmly, making me look up at her again. "You got something good in the works, brother-in-law. Bella's good for you. Anything outside of that is bullshit. And it's bullshit I will personally handle. Drummers are a dime a dozen, baby. That fucker can be replaced in the blink of an eye. And don't think I won't force the issue if I think my boys are in harm's way."

"Thanks, Rose." I smiled tentatively.

"Yuppers," she sang, giving me an evil smile. "Now, go get 'em. This is one of my favorites of the new stuff, so I'll hang around for this one. Plus, I've got to get you out of here in time to get to your meeting. And then I want you to go see your girl."

"She's not my girl, Rosie."

"She should be."

Grinning, I felt my face heat up, but I nodded her way before getting back to work. It took another hour to get it perfect, and my temper was still on the surface of things when I finally packed up and left the studio. I'd calmed down a little by the time I reached the church for the AA meeting, but it only flared up again when I didn't see my dad attending.

By the time I made it to Charlie's, I was almost beyond reason with my anger. Between James and Heidi sneaking around behind my back, the shit Aro tried to pass off as creativity, and my dad not showing up to the meeting that he had chosen would be best, I was on fire. I wanted to see Bella, drown in the calm that she brought to me.

The bar was fairly busy when I walked in, though I was happy to see that it was mostly people I knew. Jasper, Jacob, and Alec were fiddling around on the stage, and it looked like Bella had again let Jasper play the Fender that had belonged to her father. My best friend looked happier than a pig in shit. The girls – Rose, Alice, Tanya, and Kate – had taken over a table in front of the stage. Emmett and James were at the bar. It was the latter that had my temper flaring.

James had his charm on high, working both Tori and Bella. Even Garrett was eyeballing the bastard as my brother tried to lighten things up with a joke, but it was Alec who stepped up to the bar.

"Yo, James… That's Masen's girl. You might wanna back off a bit," he told him, which only resulted in a snort from James.

"Masen has more pussy than he can shake a stick at," James countered, and that made Bella's face go fierce with her temper. I'd never seen her truly pissed off. It seemed the girl was as mellow as they come, even with the bad day she'd had yesterday.

"From what I hear, so do you," she stated calmly, smiling when that brought him up short.

"I hold my own, but I'd rather hold you…"

"Get used to disappointment," she told him, which caused catcalls to ring out around the bar.

"Whatever," James muttered, slipping off the stool, but he shot me a grin when he caught sight of me. "Oh, there he is now. What'cha been doin', Masen? Or should I say…_who_?"

"Your mother. She said to tell you hello," I stated with a grin, unable to stop myself. "And that she's too tired to make you dinner."

Alec barked a laugh. "Yo Mamma jokes never get old."

"Mm," I hummed as I took a seat at the bar. "Sad part is that Mrs. Allen wouldn't turn me down. That crazy old cougar hits on me every time she sees me."

Emmett chuckled, gripping my shoulder and pulling me closer. "Did Dad show?"

"Nope." I sniffed, practically shaking in anger, but it toned down a bit when Bella stepped in front of me. "Hey, angel," I sighed in relief at the sight of her. "Ignore the trash talk." I waved a hand around the bar.

She smiled. "You think I've never heard men insult each other? You've sorely underestimated me." She studied my face, her brow wrinkling a little as she set a beer in front of me. "Though, it looked like it pissed you off."

"I've been that way all day. But I'd lose my shit if anyone upset you."

"What? The Masen's girl thing?" she asked with a soft laugh. "Nah, I know his type."

"What type is that?"

"Hmm," she sighed deeply, her eyes drifting to the fools playing around on the stage. "Oh, let's see… He's overly confident, not exactly unattractive, but his charm is his biggest weapon. He's way too concerned about how he looks, and he considers himself an outsider. He wasn't a member of the band originally, and he will never fit in, so in order to keep up or make himself feel better, he uses women. He has the need to be the center of attention, but he won't be, simply because even his career choice of being a drummer puts him in the background. And he's insanely jealous of you. Well, of _Masen_. So it wasn't about me, because he hadn't said much to me before Alec told him to back off. He'd mainly been flirting with Tori, who declined him over and over."

Grinning, I shook my head. "You scare me, 'cause that's pretty damn close. I can't imagine what you'd say about me."

"Masen or Edward?"

"Either…both!"

She smiled, leaning on the bar in front of me. Music kicked up on the stage as the guys fucked around.

"They're similar but different," she started, laughing a little when I scoffed. "Oh, but they are. You don't see it, but some of us do."

I waved her on as I sipped my beer for liquid courage, and she caught my hand and put it back down on the bar top. It took all I had not to keep touching her.

"Masen is…a bad boy, and he relishes it. Even when he's in a relationship, he pushes that image. He's smooth and confident and truly doesn't give a fuck what people think about his actions. He's a huge presence in a room and incredibly talented as a songwriter and performer. He could walk in anywhere and own it. Women want him, and men want to _be_ him.

"Edward, on the other hand," she continued softy. "He's much more low-key. He's quiet and loyal to family and friends, and he seems to never want to upset anyone. Privacy is tantamount to him, and that's probably because he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders. While he's a touch awkward about some things, he's very sweet and polite. Where Masen is very bold in his talent, Edward is naturally talented. It's subtle, even when he's simply playing lullabies to help his neighbor to fall asleep."

"Did it help?" I asked in a whisper.

"Very much."

"I'll do it anytime you need it."

She smiled, shaking her head, only to keep going. "Together, they're the perfect storm. They could have any woman in the room."

"I don't want just any woman."

"I didn't say you did, just that you could." She smirked, taking my empty mug away. She poured me a fresh one and set it down in front of me.

I wasn't sure what to say to that. I opened my mouth and then snapped it closed again. It was on the tip of my tongue to ask her out, but an outburst exploded behind me.

"Hey, Mase! Did you ask her yet!?" Jacob whisper-yelled across the room.

"Well, I was going to," I mumbled, shaking my head at being interrupted.

"This place would be fucking awesome!" he babbled loudly.

"Oh," I sighed, my hand hitting my forehead. "That's what he meant." Bella's giggle made me smile. "I guess I have to ask now," I said through a chuckle, meeting her curious gaze. "You can say no, angel, but we'd like to know if we could use your place… We're thinking of doing like a concert/documentary video thing. And the size of this place is perfect, not to mention the musical history attached to it." I pointed to the walls with the instruments and pictures of Charlie.

"Oh, um," she sputtered.

"Fuck, I'm always asking you for some shit," I grumbled. "Forget it…never mind."

"Hey," she said with a laugh. "I'll tell you when you've overstepped, Edward."

"That hasn't happened yet?"

"No." Her smile was sweet, but honesty shone in her dark eyes. "So…when? And what do you need from me?"

"In the next few weeks, and it'll be a show, so there will be more customers than usual. Rose said she'd explain more if you need it…"

She smiled. "Okay."

"Okay? As in okay we can do it? Or okay, Rose will explain?"

"Just okay, Edward. Relax."

Chuckling, I nodded but turned to my band. "She said okay."

There were cheers and celebratory catcalls, not to mention chants of "thank you" aimed Bella's way. Tori was excited, but Garrett scowled, not that Bella paid him any attention.

"What did you think Jacob meant?" she asked, smiling my way. "You looked confused."

I opened my mouth to finally ask her out, but Mike came bursting through the door of the kitchen.

"Oh my fucking hell, the whole band's here!" he exclaimed but then shoved his sister. "You let me go to the movies without telling me Radiant Eclipse was all here!?"

"Why do you think I let you go?" she countered with a cheesy grin. "Don't fangirl on them, Mike."

"Aw…B," he groaned.

"You want to meet them?" I asked him, smirking when he nodded, giving his eye-rolling sister a side glance. "C'mere." He walked around the bar, and I guided him by the shoulder to the stage. "Guys, this is Mike, Bella's younger brother. Mike, meet Alec, Jasper, Jacob, and James."

He was a little flustered when the guys shook his hand.

"Mike plays drums," I told Jasper. "That's his kit behind you."

Jasper's mouth quirked up in a smile. "Yeah? What'choo know, kid? Get back there, and let's see what you can do."

Mike practically tripped to get behind his kit, but he followed Jasper's instructions as, aside from James, everyone picked up an instrument.

"Get up here, Mase!" Jacob called. "Let's test the acoustics for this place since Bella said we could film here."

"Film what?" Mike asked, looking wide-eyed between us.

I hopped up on the stage, explaining the video to him, and he was practically vibrating with excitement. I'd have to make sure Bella brought him here for the shoot.

"What songs do you know?" I asked him.

"All of them."

I grinned at Jasper and Alec when they chuckled. "Fair enough. Then pick your poison, Mike."

When the kid started, Jasper and I locked gazes. Mike was good. Damn good. Hell, it could've been James back there, and we wouldn't have been able to tell. Actually, he was better, stronger, adding in touches of his own, but still maintaining the beat we needed. We jammed with him for a few songs, some of our older stuff, and some songs that we all loved. I sang along with Jasper, giving Bella a wink when I caught her leaning against the table of women.

Once we stopped playing and the boys started to pack up, I saw that Bella was alone behind the bar, but James was talking to her. She gave him a placating smile as she shook her head at him, which pissed me the fuck off.

"Edward," Jasper warned me, but I jumped off the stage, walking toward the bar.

"What's the matter, James? Not used to being turned down? Or are you just a glutton for punishment?" When he turned to me, I said, "Leave her the fuck alone. She's not your type."

"And what type is that?"

"Oh…prostitutes, strippers, women with low self-esteem, my ex-live-in-girlfriend…" I drawled, grinning at his shock. "How _is_ my ex, by the way?" I heard Rose hiss a string of curses, but my temper couldn't be stopped.

James grinned, ignoring my question about Heidi, but jerked his thumb toward Bella. "She says she's not your girl, Masen. I figure that's free game."

"Not that it's stopped you before."

"What can I say?" he said with a grin.

"You can say goodbye," I heard behind me, and Emmett stepped closer. "That's enough, James. Bella's not interested, and we're leaving so she can close up."

My brother didn't give him a choice, grabbing his shoulder and gripping fiercely. Emmett and James had never been friends, but my brother protected him because it was his job. However, I could see that my brother was just about to break his neck as he pushed him toward the door.

As everyone slowly left, Mike bounded up to his sister, who smiled proudly at him, even though I could see she was a little unnerved. "B, did you see?"

"I did. You were really good," she told him. "Now…go on upstairs. I'm about to close up."

Mike nodded but looked to me. "Thanks for that. It was a blast!"

"Good job, Mike," I praised, giving him a fist bump before he left out the back of the bar.

When the place was empty, there was tension in the air.

"Bella, I'm sorry…"

"You didn't have to do that."

We spoke over one another, and I shook my head, gazing down at the floor.

"Edward, look at me," she ordered, and I locked eyes with her. "I could've handled James. I don't need—"

"I know!" I interrupted, throwing my hands in the air. "I know you can. I'm the one who can't handle it." My hands slipped into my hair as I started to pace, and I gripped hard. "Normally, I can ignore him, but not today. It's been a shit day, and it's _you_. You're too good for him. And fuck me to tears, you're too good for me, too."

"Who says?" she countered.

"I do. You told me what you see about me. Let me tell you how I see you, Bella," I said, swallowing nervously when she narrowed her eyes on me. "You're fucking beautiful, and it's natural and flawless and perfect. There's nothing fake about you, and in my world that's so rare. Sometimes, I look at you and it hurts." I placed a hand on my chest. "You're the most selfless, kind, and gentle person I've ever met, but you're not naïve. You're extremely smart, and you can read bullshit a mile away. Your ex wants you back, but you don't encourage him, only because you don't want to hurt him. You're the most amazing listener I've ever met, and you make me want to blurt out all my shit, just to get it off my chest."

"Go ahead."

I snorted, shaking my head. "You don't want to hear it."

"Try me, Edward."

I was still shaking my head, but I couldn't shut the fuck up if I tried. "I'm tired of my life, Bella. I'm so fucking tired of being a puppet for a man who has no fucking idea what Radiant Eclipse is about. I'm tired of being something I'm not. I'm tired of going to AA meetings when I don't need them. And I'm tired of getting fucked over. I don't give a fuck that my ex cheated with James! That's their problem. Hell, they're probably perfect for one another. Both selfish as fuck and mean."

Bella grinned, biting her bottom lip.

"But it bugs the shit out of me that they might be leaking shit about me to the public. And I can't have that. I have too much to protect, and I sure as shit can't have them anywhere near you."

"Why?"

I huffed through my nose roughly, finally giving in to touch her. I pulled her hand so that she was sitting on the bar stool in front of me. Lightly, I touched her face, simply looking at her.

"I told you… You're too good for him. You're too good to be '_Masen's girl_,' too."

"Yeah, but no one's asked me about Edward's girl." When I froze, locking gazes with her, she smiled a little. "See… I don't know Masen, except what's on TV, and I've been told by a very good source that he's pretty much a man in a mask. But I have this new neighbor…and he's pretty great, despite how he sees himself. It's the man behind the mask I'm interested in – the one who practically breaks his neck to help me bring in groceries; the one who gets embarrassed when he's flirting; the one who sometimes comes into my bar just to keep me company on slow nights; and the one who played the piano for me yesterday morning so that I wouldn't be dragging all night long at work from lack of sleep." She shook her head. "Masen is fine. He just gave my baby brother the best night of his life, being able to jam with his favorite band, but it's Edward who can't seem to get the courage to ask me out."

Laughing softly, I pressed my forehead to hers. "How?"

"Your brother, who's a hot mess, by the way."

"He is that."

"He was worried about you." She smiled up at me but pulled me closer. "He thought I'd shoot you down, simply because I don't like the media."

"It's a legit concern, angel," I whispered, wanting so badly to kiss her, but not until I knew for sure that it was what she wanted. "I don't want to hurt you. And I most definitely don't want you to be uncomfortable." I stayed standing close but pulled my head back a little. "Unfortunately, my job is…public."

"I remember." She chuckled. "I also remember what it was like for my dad. It wasn't _all_ bad."

"God, I hope you mean that, Bella," I whispered, squeezing my eyes closed. "Because I'd hate for you to regret this."

"Regret what?"

"This," I said, my lips pressing to hers because I couldn't take it any longer. I needed her kiss like I needed air. And I couldn't help the moan that escaped me when her hands gripped my shirt and bicep and she returned the kiss with a push of air against my cheek, but it was her legs that pulled me closer. Something in me broke loose, and my hands shot to that ponytail, gripping it so I could turn her head. Tongues twisted, tasted, claimed. There were teeth involved, scraping deliciously over lips, and she felt incredible against me.

I slowed us down, or I was going to ravish her right there in her bar. We were both breathing heavy, and Bella's eyes were dark as she opened them, but her tongue dragged across her bottom lip as if she were savoring, making the kiss last longer.

"You kill me," I breathed before kissing her again, but as deep and sexy as it was, I ended it just as fast. "Please, let me take you out before I leave next week."

"I can't," she panted but cupped my face when my heart sank. "Not because I don't want to, but my brother's here and I have to work. I have an idea, though." I nodded against her forehead, and she smiled. "I'm taking tomorrow off to make dinner for Mike. You're welcome to join us."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, definitely. He'll probably go out with his friends after, but I want him to eat more than pizza while he's here." She grinned at my chuckle. "You, too."

"So dinner tomorrow," I reiterated, smiling when she nodded. "Are you sure, angel? About this…about me? You said I could have anyone in the room, but I only see you in every room." I shrugged a shoulder when she cupped my face. "It's true. I… It won't be easy. I'm not easy to deal with—"

"You're busy, Edward. That doesn't make you a bad person," she countered. "You think I don't remember my dad running off all over the world? I do. I didn't like it, but we learned to deal. I missed him terribly, but he called me just about every other night. I'll miss you, too. It's only been a month since we met, but I already kinda like having you around."

"This is different, Bella. You'll see things, read things that will test your faith in me. I don't cheat, but I have to play a part."

"I'm aware," she said with a nod. "I've seen you in concert. Masen is a sexy fucker on that stage and with his fans."

Chuckling, I shook my head. "I want this. I want you…so badly, Bella. I just…I don't want you to get hurt. And I damned sure don't want it to be me who does the hurting. It would kill me."

"You know, I'm just as human. You have a lot of faith in me to not go blabbing."

I scoffed. "Would you?"

"No."

"Case closed."

We stared at each other for a moment, but I asked, "You're sure?"

When she nodded with that adorable smile, I kissed her again. This time, I took my time learning her mouth, her lips, the way her tongue felt against mine. When I pulled away, I pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"I wanted that the second you saved me from the paps that first night."

She giggled. "Yeah, I wanted that the day you signed your lease."

Chuckling, I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her off the stool and onto her feet. "C'mon, Bella. I'll wait for you to close up, and I'll walk you to your door."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… These two…they set their own pace with me, I swear, which will help those of you that are about to DIE with the somewhat slow burn. Trust me, on this one…these two know who and what they want… And Dad was a no-show at the meeting. And James…isn't he special? **

**Questions…**

**Was Sully from Godsmack the inspiration? Actually, no. It was M. Shadows from Avenged Sevenfold, if only for his ink and that very pretty face. I mean…**_**pretty**_**. LOL Plus, he's all married with kids and seems so normal. So…he kinda sparked my interest, but I've used a lot of various groups while writing…and some of my own creativity.**

**Will Bella ever stand up to her mom? She does. Constantly, as you saw in the last chapter. Bella stands her ground, but unfortunately, Mike is a minor and is kinda stuck with an overprotective mother, which Bella tries to cushion.**

**Okay…I think that's it. You know the stuff… Youtube has the playlist. FB, Twitter, and my blog have the pic teasers. And I'll be back on Sunday with another chapter. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	7. Sad but True

**A/N… A kiss got a big reaction! :D I know some of you are worried about the tour, about James and Heidi, and about a whole list of other things. Take a deep breath, and let it out. There's a method to the madness. ALL the madness. I didn't label this angst for a reason, okay?**

**I'll let you get to it. I answer a question or two at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 7 – Sad but True**

_You  
You're my mask  
You're my cover, my shelter  
You  
You're my mask  
You're the one who's blamed  
Do  
Do my work  
Do my dirty work, scapegoat  
Do  
Do my deeds  
For you're the one who's shamed_

_I'm your dream, make you real_  
_I'm your eyes when you must steal_  
_I'm your pain when you can't feel_  
_Sad but true_

"_Sad But True" – Metallica _

**EDWARD**

The heavy guitar and low bass gave me a rhythm to run. I needed to run off my stress, my nerves, and my need to scurry downstairs just to kiss Bella again. And again.

Shaking my head, I zoned out, pushing myself harder on the treadmill. It had been a long damn night without much sleep. I'd walked Bella to her door after she'd closed the bar, and we'd kissed again for what seemed like hours, and by the time we'd finally pulled apart, I could barely think straight – much less walk straight – up to my apartment.

Once my body had calmed down, my brain took over, and every insecurity, every concern, and every fear chased away the euphoria that kissing Bella had brought my way. She'd felt so damn good in my arms, and her mouth was like a drug to me. And that was just her mouth… I couldn't imagine what the rest of her would do to me.

My legs started to burn as I tried to run away from it all, but essentially, I stayed in one damn place, which was pretty much my life in a nutshell. I focused on breathing, on putting one foot in front of the other, and on the music in my earbuds, not the thoughts of Bella.

The night before had been so fucking strange. I'd shown up at Charlie's in such a piss-poor mood, and seeing James unable to leave Bella the hell alone had caused something in me to snap. All I could do, all I could concentrate on was getting her away from him. But now that I had, the question remained: Was I any better for her than he was?

My life was controlled clutter and chaos. It was a farce…at least up to a point. Everything I'd ever told her about me was true. Everything I'd ever asked of her, she'd given willingly. And sweet fuck, the way she'd looked at me, responded to me...

Movement suddenly caught the corner of my eye, and I almost fell off the treadmill when two people seemed to appear out of thin fucking air.

"Shit, fuck!" I gasped, stumbling off the treadmill and pulling out my headphones. "Seriously? Are you trying to kill me?"

My brother broke into a laugh, practically doubling over. "I knocked, bro…like four times."

Rose's smirk was short-lived. "And that's why I have a key."

"Yeah, well…" I panted, picking up my T-shirt from the rail of the treadmill to wipe the sweat off my face and chest as they sat down in my kitchen. "Scaring the shit out of me wasn't exactly the reason I gave it to you. I thinking more like…I don't know…watering my plants."

"You don't have plants," Emmett pointed out. "And you let your fish die two years ago. Poor Ozzy."

Rolling my eyes, I took a bottle of water out of the fridge, practically draining the whole damn thing. "Why are you here? I thought we were clear until we left on Monday." I straddled a kitchen chair across from them.

Rose set a manila envelope down on the table, her face fierce. "I need to go over a few things with you. You won't be happy."

"Is this about James?" I asked, looking to my brother when he nodded with a scowl.

"Among other things," Rose sighed. "First, I have your travel info for Monday. You guys will only be in L.A. for a couple of days, and then it's right back here to finish up the album." She slid my plane ticket my way, and I barely glanced at it. "Next, Aro spoke to Warren Milton about the video, and it's a go. He loves the idea, which rubbed Aro the wrong way, but he can't say shit. Warren sees it as a documentary of sorts. Now, since Bella has cleared us to use Charlie's Pub, I had Uncle Jay draw up a contract for her. She'll be rewarded handsomely for this, not to mention the record company will be providing extra security, bartenders, and servers for the days and nights we'll be filming. We'll use both real fans and paid extras."

"Sounds…reasonable?" I questioned, simply because Aro wasn't always reasonable.

Rose smirked. "Aro is walking a fine line with you guys, Edward. He knows that Radiant Eclipse brings him a shit-ton of respect and money. He also knows that your contract is essentially up when this album and tour are all complete. He wants you back, and in order to do that, he's going to suck up to you…with ridiculously puckered lips to your ass."

Emmett and I chuckled, but I shrugged, saying, "So what? No amount of ass-kissing is going to keep us, I don't think. Unless he gives us complete control. He produces the records, and that's it. No more puppet master. Which means…" I held up fingers, ticking off my points one by one. "No more feeding the media with bullshit, no more Masen is a crazy, drunk, man-whore, no more…idiotic events, interviews, and videos."

"Yes, all of that," Rose agreed. "And he's hating it. But he'd rather keep you in any capacity than to lose you completely. You guys want control, and you want to produce your own stuff. It's understandable, considering how much you guys have grown and improved since the beginning. Plus, you're older now, so it's almost expected, which is what the critics are whispering."

I nodded. "Yeah, I figured."

"You, Alec, Jake, and Jasper have to sit down and _truly_ decide what you want to do. Technically, you can write your own ticket, and Aro can't say shit about it. Or…you can completely separate from Volturi Records and go out on your own," she stated firmly. "It looks good either way, because if Volturi doesn't agree to your terms, then you leave. That's that."

I noted that she didn't say James, but I'd known her long enough to wait. She was fuck-awesome at her job, and I trusted her totally.

She flipped open the manila envelope again, pulling out a stack of papers. "Now…the ugly shit." She glanced to Emmett when he shifted a little in his seat. "If your accusations toward James last night didn't alert him, Emmett's manhandling of his dumb ass did. I can't be mad, though. I'd had my uncle look into James's contracts. In order to get rid of James, he'd have to be paid off…a ridiculous amount of money."

"So pay it. I want him gone."

"We can do that, though I honestly don't think he deserves shit." Rose pulled a page or two to the front of the stack in her hands, setting them down. "But good call on the non-disclosure, brother-in-law." She smirked, winking my way. "He did, in fact, sign one. He's not to speak publicly of any Radiant Eclipse business, financial earnings, or band members' private affairs. Which means," she urged, holding up a finger when my mouth opened to speak. "It means that if Heidi and James are leaking info about you or your family…or any other member of the band, he's not only liable, but his days as a member of Radiant Eclipse are over." She sighed deeply. "We just have to prove it."

"How do we do that?" I asked, my temper rising. "I have nothing to say to Heidi, and we can't prove they're doing anything but texting each other."

"Ah, but we can. It'll just take time. Uncle Jay has a private investigator firm on his payroll. He's going to put them to work. Like immediately." Her smile was wicked. "They're going to insert themselves in not only the media to get to James, but in Heidi's life – a new maid or something – but I don't want to know. The less _we_ know, the better it'll look at the end of the day."

"How long?"

"Not long, bro," Emmett stated. "You just gotta finish recording the album. I'll watch your back when we travel and when you're at the studio. I'm hoping that by the time we go on tour, you'll have a new drummer. Which, by the way, that Mike kid was the bomb-diggity."

"No shit, right?" I asked with a laugh. "He's only seventeen, though. And his mother…_hates_ musicians."

Rose and Emmett laughed, but it was Emmett that spoke through his chuckle. "Well, she must love you."

"No, not at all." I frowned, shaking my head. "Just another reason Bella should stay away from me."

"Don't do that, Edward," Emmett sighed, folding his arms across his chest. "Bella's not fragile, nor is she blind as to what you are. Actually, she's pretty damn protective of you. I thought she'd pimp-slap James last night before you showed up. And it's not about Masen with her. She likes you, fool. So…who gives a shit if her mom doesn't like you? In fact, who fucking cares about any of it as long as you two are cool with it?"

Grinning, I nodded. Emmett would always be my big brother. Never mind that he was my head of security.

"And," Rose added, smiling my way. "I will make sure to keep her in the loop as much as I can. I know how shit looks, so…I can cushion some of that for her."

"Thanks," I whispered, smiling over at them. "I…I'm… I'm supposed to have dinner downstairs with Bella and Mike tonight. I just…I'm…"

"Take wine for Bella. And something sweet for the kid," Rose suggested. "You'll be fine. That Mike thinks the sun rises and sets out of your ass, so it won't matter. Bella, though, she likes you. _You_, Edward. Not the lead singer of some band. You. So…" She sighed, a sad expression coming over her face. "I know about her dad, sweetie. It was an ugly thing, and she's wary of the media, if only for that reason. But…" She held up a finger. "She's not shy, and she's not afraid of speaking up, which she probably did when we all left the bar last night." I laughed, nodding a little. "Oh, yeah…she wasn't happy that I stepped up to James," I told them, and that thought only brought the kisses back to the forefront of my mind, and I felt my cheeks heat.

Rose chuckled. "Must've been a helluva make-up session, though."

Grinning, I shrugged. "Maybe." My smile fell quickly. "I don't want her hurt, though."

"It'll never happen," Emmett vowed, his face fierce and angry. "I told James to stay away from my brother's girl. Contract or non-disclosure…or whatever… I'll kick his ass either way. She's been good to you…to us for letting us use her place and all. She's good people," he said, repeating what Jasper had said. "And the boys love her, even Jake, who she shot down…not that he gives a shit. He's fooling around with his dad's nurse. James, though, will learn to deal, or I'll break his hands."

"You miss the wrestling team, don't you?" I teased, laughing when he reached over and ruffled my hair.

"Nah, this is much more fun."

I nodded, standing when they did. Emmett had been slotted for UW's wrestling team but got injured just before he graduated high school. His Olympic dream was shot to hell, so he simply came with me when Aro found Radiant Eclipse, and he'd never bitched or complained once, even when our parents hit the fucking roof.

"Oh," he said, turning to face me before he reached the door. "I called Dad." When my eyes narrowed, he held up a hand. "He _said_ he had to work last night, which is why he didn't show." He paused for a second. "Funny that… 'Cause when I talked to Mom, they'd had dinner plans…"

"'Kay," was all I could say to that for a moment. "He's not gonna stop drinking…unless something forces his hand. I should've let nature take its course the night he wrecked, but I just… He was so fucking scared. And Mom…I couldn't see her handling it, especially had he lost his medical license."

Emmett sighed heavily. "Drunk and on-call. I don't even… Anyway, I just wanted you to know. I have no fucking idea what to do about it, but still…"

I nodded. "I can't _make_ him do shit. I'll finish out what I have to do to settle the case, but…" I shrugged a shoulder. "I have my own life and problems, and in a few weeks, I won't have _his_ problem to cover for anymore."

"You gonna tell Bella?" Rose asked.

"You said I couldn't!"

"I think she's pretty trustworthy, Edward." Rose chuckled a little, but the humor evaporated quickly. "She's had one of the biggest celebrities living right above her, free for the taking, and she's done more protecting than speaking. She could've filled her bar with fans and media in order to boost business, but that's not her. Though, she doesn't really need the money."

"Huh? Why?" I gaped stupidly.

Rose grinned. "You don't know?" she asked, laughing when I shook my head. "That father of hers left every penny to her, right along with this building and the bar. Meaning…she has control over the rights to his music. Anytime it's used, sampled, or played somewhere, Miss Bella gets a check."

Grinning, I laughed a little. "Good for her!"

"Yeah, I figured you'd like that shit. She'll get a portion of that when we record here, too, just so you know. Jasper wants to play a tribute song to Chainsaw Charlie, so we'll need permission."

"Fair enough." I smiled, walking them to the door. When I opened it, I couldn't help but smile at the pretty little brunette standing on the other side with wide eyes. For the first second or two, I thought it was because I'd surprised her, but I realized that her eyes were raking over every inch of my bare torso, almost as if she was reading every tattoo I had etched into my skin. "Angel…"

"Oh, hey! I didn't realize you had company, Edward. I'll come back…"

"No, no… They're leaving," I sang, reaching out to grab her hand in order to keep her right there in my kitchen. "You…can stay."

Rose giggled, pushing me a little out of the way. "Hey, Bella… I'm going to call you next week to go over the contract for the video shoot. It'll be when we get back from L.A."

"Um, sure. Anytime. I'm here."

Rose kissed my cheek, and Emmett gave me a rough hug before they left. When the door clicked closed, leaving Bella and me alone, the air in the room felt like it was thick, heavy.

"Everything okay?" she asked, glancing from my face to the door.

Nodding, I stepped closer to her. "Yes," I whispered, smirking a little as she backed up a step for every one I took toward her. "Just…business…" I stopped when her back met my door. "Am I making you nervous, angel?"

She shook her head, laughing a little.

"Do I stink? I've been running…"

"I know. I heard you. But…no." There it was again, her eyes raking over my chest, arms, and stomach.

"Are you here to rescind your invitation for dinner?" I asked her, and that got her attention.

Her sharp, dark eyes shot up to my face as she frowned up at me. "Why would I do that?"

"I… You could've changed your mind, Bella."

Fuck, the urge to press her into that door was almost overwhelming. There was an electricity in the air around us; it pushed and pulled at me to lean in.

She smiled, shaking her head again, but her hand twitched a little at her side. "I didn't change my mind, Edward."

I couldn't stop the sigh of relief that I let out heavily, nor could I stop the grin that quirked up my face.

"No?"

"No, Edward."

"Then why are you here?"

"I don't know!" Her giggle was utterly adorable, as was the slight pink on her cheeks. "I can't think."

Swallowing nervously, I nodded in understanding. "But I don't wanna think…"

She was too beautiful, too sweet, and apparently, my lack of shirt was rendering her unable to function properly. A part of me said to back up, to back away and let her breathe. The other part of me heard, "Me, either," come out of her mouth so softly that it almost wasn't audible.

"Bella, I…" I started to beg her to stop me, to put an end to the charge that seemed to graze across my skin, simply because she was so close. But when her hand reached out to touch my chest, warm fingers ghosting across my ink, I couldn't stop myself.

My lips met hers, and she welcomed them, a small whimper escaping her. And that was all the encouragement I needed. My hands spread across her hips, flexing like I had to touch as much of her at one time as I could, but it wasn't enough. Sliding them to her back at the same time that her arms slipped up around my neck, I moaned softly. Her fingers dug into my shoulder and threaded into my hair, and I pulled back just a little.

"More…I need…"

"Yes," she breathed, pulling at me, and without thinking, I let my hands skim down to her sweet ass, giving it a good squeeze before lifting her up. "Oh, God…" Her head fell back to the door with a soft thump, and I immediately needed to taste that soft, sweet, creamy skin where I could see her pulse pounding.

"I know," I breathed against her throat. "Tell me to stop, angel. You…I…"

Her fingers gripped my hair, pulling me away from her neck. Instead of making me stop, she pulled my lips to hers. Everything in me surged forward, pressing her into the door, gripping her ass to bring her closer, and letting my tongue claim, taste, take. She let go of my shoulder, placing her hand on my jaw.

"Edward," she mumbled, slowly pulling away.

I placed three more soft kisses to her lips, finally able to see, and when I met her gaze, I chuckled at the look of desperation that matched my own. "I'd say I'm sorry…"

"Don't you dare," she whispered, smiling a little as she seemed to be perfectly content in my arms up against that door. "That was…"

"What I'd been thinking about all fucking morning," I finished for her, and she giggled and nodded. "You're beautiful."

"So are you," she replied, trailing fingers across my ink. "I want to read you like a book."

I laughed, giving her a wink, but I pulled her off the door and walked her into my living room, only to fall onto the sofa. "Read on, bookworm."

"No!" She laughed, her head falling back. "I can't. I want to, but…"

"Ah, she remembers why she's here!" I teased her. "A good kiss can kick-start the brain…"

"Among other things."

"She speaks the truth," I whispered against her lips, shifting my hips a little. It was no secret how she made me feel. In fact, she was pressing deliciously down onto me.

She smirked, forcing me to look her in the eye. "No, I came up here to find out if there was anything you wanted for dinner tonight. Or if there was something you couldn't eat."

"I don't like Brussels sprouts, angel. Otherwise, I'm pretty easy to feed."

"Got it…no tiny little cabbages." She nodded once in mock seriousness. "Mike wants spaghetti, and he likes the sauce made from scratch, so I gotta get to work."

"You spoil him." I said with a chuckle, but I didn't let her up off my lap just yet. She made me very happy right there.

"I can't help it. We were a team growing up."

Smiling, I nodded. "Yeah, Emmett and I were the same way."

Bella's eyes were warm and soft and beautiful as she smiled at me. She reached up, raked her fingers through my hair, only to kiss me briefly. "Six o'clock, Edward."

"I'm there," I promised her, nodding when she stood up from my lap. "I'll bring dessert, angel."

She grinned and nodded. "Okay."

It took a second for me to be able to stand after having that gorgeous thing on my lap, in my arms, and kissing me stupid. Hell, I could still feel her fingers tugging deliciously at my hair; my scalp still tingled with it. When I grimaced, trying to adjust myself, I caught her staring.

"I'd say I'm sorry," she started, but I pulled her to me, pressing my lips to hers.

"Don't you dare," I repeated what she'd said to me.

Her laugh was soft and easy as I wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her to the door. As we walked by the kitchen table, my phone vibrated across the top. I snatched it up, frowning at the fact that it was my dad. I was too pissed at him for missing more AA meetings to talk at the moment, and I wasn't going to interrupt the best morning I'd had in ages. Bella had taken the fears I'd had woken up with and the shitty news that Rose had brought my way, and she'd wadded all of it up and thrown it out. No, my dad could fucking wait.

I felt a warm hand on my face, turning it from the glare I was giving the phone to a worried expression on her face.

"Where'd you go?"

I shook my head. "Nowhere." She glanced at the phone and then my face, and I could see that she wanted to ask, but just being how she was, I knew she wouldn't. "My dad, angel. And I just don't want to deal with him right now. It's a long damn story. And I'll tell you all about it, but not today. Today is too damned important. You've put me in a fuck-awesome mood, and talking about him would screw that up. Okay?"

She smiled, but I could see she was still worried. "Whenever you're ready…"

"I know. Thank you," I whispered against her lips. "Now…go on. I'll be down there at six. I've got to run a few errands. Call or text if you need anything."

Her smile was warm and sweet when she gave me a small wave before walking out my door. A glance at the clock told me I had a few hours before I had to be downstairs for dinner.

In the shower, where thoughts of Bella had me so hard it was almost painful, I gave in and wrapped a hand around my throbbing dick. It didn't take much to take care of the problem. I'd just had the most beautiful woman wrapped all around me and pressed against my damn front door as we kissed like we were never going to stop. And I wouldn't have stopped had Bella not slowed us down, which was perfectly fine with me. I was completely content go at whatever pace she wanted.

Once I was out of the shower and dressed, I grabbed my keys and looked at my phone. Shaking my head at a few more missed calls from my dad, I ignored them and left my apartment. With traffic and the few stops I had to make, I found myself racing the clock.

I was a minute late when I finally knocked on Bella's door. It was yanked open, and I chuckled at Mike, standing there in a Metallica T-shirt. The smell of garlic and sauce hit me like a brick wall, and suddenly, I was a starving man.

"Traitor," I teased him, pointing to his chest, and he grinned.

"Yeah, well…I'm a huge Lars fan."

"Yeah, he's an amazing drummer. Funny fucker, too."

"C'mon on in. Bella's blowin' up the kitchen."

"Shut up, ass!" I heard from my right, but when she caught sight of me with wine, she practically sagged.

"Hey, angel, I brought wine." I kissed her temple.

"Hey… you didn't have to…" she sighed but then cracked a smile when I held it up. "But I'm glad you did. Glasses are in that cabinet, and no, Mike can't have any."

"Aww, B…"

"You don't even like it!" she argued, rolling her eyes up to me when I chuckled as I poured us two glasses. "Please ignore him. He's leaving after dinner anyway…some hot date."

"Best of luck, then," I said with a laugh his way, flinching when Bella tossed her towel at me. "What's her name?"

Bella tsked my way, but I shot her a wink, turning back to Mike when he answered, "Lauren."

Mike chattered on about his girl as he set the table for us, and I leaned against the counter next to Bella as she brushed garlic butter onto bread and popped it into the oven.

"Almost ready," she whispered. "And forgive my brother. I think he's hoping to cash in his V-card tonight. Though, I honestly don't want to know about it."

I snorted into my wine glass, especially when Mike froze for a second. "Not cool, B…and like I'd tell you…"

"Hmm," she hummed, but her amusement was adorable.

"Dammit," he growled a little, shaking his head and pointing my way. "This guy gets more play than a rich man at a strip club with a wad of cash… Now he knows I'm a loser."

"Oh, he knew…" She giggled, grinning his way.

"Stop!" I laughed, holding up my hand. "First…" I pointed to Mike. "At seventeen…no play. None. Like a pitifully dry desert. Trust me, Mike." Bella's eyes shot to mine, and I could see that bit of information came as a shock. "Nope. Didn't cash in my V-card until I was close to nineteen." I shrugged a shoulder. "Loser or not…it's the truth." I turned back to Mike. "I was too into music, not to mention just busy as all hell, and I was a skinny little fuck, so…no. And second, not as much 'play' as you'd think, buddy."

"But you and Heidi Summers," he stated, his mouth hanging open. "And the chicks on tour…you guys must…"

I shook my head as we all took a seat at the table. "Heidi and I are done. We've been done for few months now, and before that, I'd been on tour for almost five months. And I don't touch the fans…or should I say groupies. There's a difference, truly. Fans are normal. Groupies are…insane. A few of the guys used to go there…or they did once upon a time, but not now. Alec's married to a really nice girl named Carrie; he met her at the bank he uses. They've been together for years. She'll sometimes go on the road with us. Jake, despite his flirting with Bella, is actually pretty damn taken. He just loves to hit on girls. Leah – his girlfriend – is the nurse who takes care of Jake's dad. Jasper and Alice have been together since our first record. She was our costume person, but now she handles just about everything that Rose can't."

"And James?" he asked, passing the bowl of pasta my way.

I sneered, biting my tongue. I didn't want to ruin Mike's idea of us completely. I really liked the kid, and I loved his enthusiasm over the band and music in general. It would be like outing the fact that Santa Claus didn't exist.

"James is…"

"He's a pig, Mikey," Bella stated firmly, pointing her forkful of perfectly coiled sauce and pasta at him. "Don't use him as someone to look up to."

Mike gaped at her, but I shrugged a shoulder. "Your sister can spot bullshit a mile away." I smiled at Bella. "And James reeks of it. Not to mention he pushed his limit with her last night, which just about got his ass beat…"

"By you?" Mike asked with a laugh.

"By Bella," I answered, grinning at the scowling girl next to me. "But my brother more than anyone…"

The conversation shifted from there, and it was easy and fun. When we'd had our fill of spaghetti and garlic bread, I pointed to the box I'd set on the counter, telling them it was filled with real authentic Italian cannoli. Mike practically inhaled two of them before his phone went off. He kissed his sister's cheek, taking Bella's car keys, and gave me a fist bump before leaving us alone in the kitchen.

"Coffee?" she offered, and I nodded, unable to keep my eyes off her when she got up from the table to pour us two cups. When she sat back down, she stirred in sugar to her cup, looking up at me. "You're really sweet to him. You didn't have to tell him that stuff."

"He's a good kid. He's easy to like. And nothing I said was a lie, angel," I sighed, smiling a little.

"Even the V-card stuff?"

"_Especially_ the V-card stuff. It wasn't until we started to gain a small following in Seattle that I started getting attention from girls. It was hard to say no to," I said with a grin. "But that shit gets old really fucking fast. It was why I welcomed the whole relationship with Heidi. I'd thought it would work, that we were exclusive and safe." I shrugged a shoulder. "Alec was already married by then. Alice and Jasper were inseparable. I kinda liked the idea of it all, but she wasn't…" I sighed, looking over to Bella, who was watching me closely with warm, dark eyes. "I should've known better. We fit with the fame side of shit, Bella – you know, parties, premieres, award shows, concerts – but outside of that, we were too different. Heidi preferred _Masen_ and all the shit that came with him, not the guy I am on my downtime. She liked attention, too, so I should've known leaving her for months at a time would be…a mistake."

Bella huffed a laugh, but it was humorless and a touch angry. "Seriously? You're excusing her from cheating?"

"No, not at all. I'm simply saying that maybe we used each other for completely different reasons. I knew it way back then, and I should've done something about it, even though we'd had fun in the beginning. But she saved me the trouble when I went away to rehab."

"Did you care about her?" Bella asked, poking at the cannoli on her plate.

Smirking, I tilted her face up with my fingers under her chin. "Are you asking if I loved her?" I asked her, and she nodded but shrugged, which I'd learned was Bella's way of saying it wasn't her business. "I cared about her, angel, but it wasn't…"

Bella smiled a little. "I understand."

Studying her face, I smirked, asking, "Garrett?"

Her nose wrinkled a little, but she nodded. "Yeah, we were friends first, and it was comfortable and fun, but he got…serious. But it wasn't… He wanted to take the next step, just because he thought we should, and I wasn't there…at all. And it wasn't fair to him when I didn't feel the same. I feel we're better friends than…more."

I pulled her to me, kissing her forehead. "You're too sweet for your own good, angel."

"He wouldn't agree with you…not when I first broke things off with him, anyway."

"His loss. My gain."

"Heidi's too." She smirked over at me. "Is it true she called you Masen, not Edward?"

Grinning, I shook my head, simply because I figured out what Tanya and Kate had been whispering to her that day in my apartment. "Heidi _chose_ to call me Masen, Bella…not that I encouraged her otherwise."

"But me? Why? You didn't even know me…"

I cupped her face, kissing her softly, which was becoming more and more addictive since the first one last night. She tasted sweet, like the cream and chocolate from the cannoli, but warm and what was quickly becoming as familiar as the back of my hand.

When I pulled back, I kept her precious face in my hands. "I don't know. It was just…different. You're different. It felt _right_. And now, I do know you…or we're getting there, and I'm so fucking glad to know that I made the right decision to hide in your bar that night."

Her giggle was soft, shaking us both. "Poor thing. You looked like a deer in headlights."

Grinning, I said, "Not headlights…crosshairs." I sighed deeply – in want of her and in a touch of nerves at my next question. "I'm going to ask this one more time, Bella, because this isn't a game to me, and I'm not fucking around. I really want to see where this…us…can go. Are you _sure_ about this?"

Bella took my hands from her face, holding them in her lap. "You expect me to run away?"

"I hope to God you won't, but I'll understand if you do."

She tsked, frowning and shaking her head. "Edward, if I wasn't sure, I wouldn't have invited you to dinner with my brother. You wouldn't be here _right now_."

I shifted in my chair, slipping my fingers into her hair at her neck, pulling her to me…all of her. I guided her until she was astride my lap, my lips barely separating from hers. She kissed me back, but I could feel the little smile on her lips.

"Thank you," I whispered, meeting her dark eyes when she pressed her forehead to mine. "For the invite and for dinner."

I kissed her once more and helped her to her feet. "I should get home. It'll be a long week for me. Walk me out?" I asked, holding out my hand and smiling when she nodded and slipped her fingers through mine.

We walked outside, and as soon as the door closed behind her, I had Bella pressed up against it and was kissing her as if my life depended on it – almost but not quite as intense as when I'd had her in my apartment just that afternoon. When I finally pulled back enough to breathe, I rested my forehead on hers, taking in her scent and the feel of her breath as it puffed out against my cheek.

"Go back in before I drag you upstairs," I groaned, reaching up to rake my hand through my hair, my gaze moving over her face as her cheeks turned pink and she smiled. "You're way too tempting, angel, but I… I don't want to rush any of this."

I grimaced at my babbling, thinking she'd laugh, but I needed her to understand this wasn't just something I did all the fucking time. She was more…_way more_…important than just getting off. Getting off was easy and ridiculously empty, and that wasn't what this was. The things Bella made me feel were new but amazing and comforting and scary all at the same time. I could be _me _with her, and it was freeing. I wanted to relish it. All of it.

But she didn't laugh. She smiled so warmly, it took all I had not to push her back inside when she stepped closer.

"Good night, Edward," she said softly, kissing me once more sweetly before I stepped back. She turned the knob, stepped into the apartment, and smiled before the door closed, leaving me alone on her doorstep.

I took the stairs two at a time, my smile growing until I stepped into my place. Despite the list of things I needed to do before I left on Monday, my mind was a whirlwind of just…Bella. There were things I wanted to do with her, things I needed to tell her, and experiences I wanted to share with her. Words and notes started to form in my head, and before I could lose them, I rushed to the piano to snatch up a piece of paper and got to work on something new, something that reminded me of Bella.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… We had a successful date and more kissing, not to mention an Edward that is willing to take his time. There's also some possible talks in their future.**

**Questions…**

**Someone on FB asked me what Masen's voice sounded like. Was it like Rob's or someone else? I don't really have an answer. Rob's is very soft and raspy in a sexy-smoky kind of way. Radiant Eclipse is a heavier sound. I can describe a lot of things, but the sound/picture I have in my head for his singing is hard to put into words – a clear voice, with trained vibrato and the ability to belt out rock, but can sing a ballad too? LMAO I don't know! :) **

**How old is Mike? He's 17, soon to be 18. **

**I think that's all the questions that needed answering. You guys have your theories on a lot of things, and we're moving along. Up next is Bella again. Her POV is important occasionally, if only to show the other side of things.**

**As usual, the playlist is up on YouTube and the pics are on FB, Twitter, and my blog. The next update will be Wednesday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	8. Figure it Out

**A/N… You guys make me laugh about their date. I'm glad you approved. We're back with Bella this time around. I'll let you get to it. See you at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 8 – Figure it Out**

_Broke my shoe, tripped and fell on you  
But you didn't know I planned it out  
I said I'd go, cause I won't see you later  
And we're not allowed to figure it out_

_Nothing here to see_  
_Just a kid like me_  
_Trying to cut some teeth_  
_Trying to figure it out_

_Nothing better to do_  
_When I'm stuck on you_  
_I'm still in here trying to figure it out_

"_Figure it Out" – Royal Blood_

**BELLA**

_Can I see you before I leave tomorrow?_

The smile that curled my lips as I read Edward's text couldn't be stopped if I tried. It spread across my face slowly, causing a chuckle from Tori.

"Is he _sexting_ you?!" she squealed, running from one side of my bar to where I was standing at the other end.

"What? No!" I scoffed, typing back that I was right downstairs at work, but I tucked my phone away before she could snag a peek. I laughed at her pleading face. "We've been on _one date_, Tori, and it was dinner at my apartment with my little brother."

She looked at me like I was lying or crazy, but even though she'd seen him a hundred times in the bar since he'd moved into the apartment upstairs, she still saw him as Masen. She had no idea that he wasn't the persona he projected all the time. Or maybe she did but chose to objectify him anyway. I understood it, simply because he was gorgeous. It was easy to get wrapped up in his looks, his slow, sexy half-smile. His quiet nature made him a mystery to people who didn't know him.

The phone bleeped from my pocket, and Tori stared at me until I sighed, pulling it out. I had to spin, duck, and weave to keep his message to myself.

_I'm not home, but I will be in like five minutes. Meet me in the alley, angel. Please?_

I quickly closed the screen, turning to face a very disappointed Tori.

"You really like him," she stated, pouting a little but grinning back over her shoulder when she got back to washing beer mugs. We weren't all that busy, but we never really were on Sunday nights. "Seriously, Bella. You do, don't you?" She served a pitcher of beer to a table full of businessmen staying at the hotel around the corner – the same hotel Edward had been staying when he stumbled into my bar the first time. "I remember you and Garrett together, boss, and you _never_ got all…" She gestured up and down my body. "All…I don't know…swoony over him. You…this guy…he makes you swoony."

Laughing, I shook my head, but the girl was right. Edward was…different. It wasn't his fame or looks or anything that everyone saw. It was the sweet things that only I saw that made me crazy about him.

After our date Friday night, I fell asleep to the sounds of Edward playing the piano. It was different than the first time he'd played for me. This time, I could tell he was writing. And it was beautiful and soulful – there was a touch of hope to it, where most of the time his music was heavier. Saturday had proven to be a busy day for him. He'd been called to the studio to rerecord a song – he'd been pretty pissed that something had gone wrong the first time – so I barely saw him. Today, the poor thing was running around trying to get packed and ready to leave for L.A. for a few days.

"Bella?" Tori asked laughingly, coming back to stand in front me.

"Yeah," I finally answered her in a whisper, wrinkling my brow. "I do like him."

Tori grinned, bouncing a little on her toes. "Good! 'Cause he's crazy about you. Every time he's here, his eyes are on you. Not a single other person but you."

Smirking, I nodded but pointed to the bar. "You okay for a minute?"

"Yeah, yeah…sure."

I walked through the kitchen door, grabbing my jacket on the way out the back. I'd barely had time to pull it on before strong, warm arms wrapped around me from behind.

"That'd better be you, Edward, or I'm about to get mugged," I teased him with a grin, because his smell surrounded me. It was uniquely Edward – leather from his jacket, a touch of woodsy scent, and a light splash of cologne. It was deliciously perfect and clean and not overdone.

His chuckle was deep and so damn sexy, and it pushed his breath out against my neck, causing my skin to practically crawl as his hands started to move. "Well, let's see… You got anything worth stealing, beautiful?"

I wanted to tell him that he'd most likely already stolen my heart, but I thought better of it. It was no less true, but he was so nervous about us as it was that it would probably scare him.

"Not on me," I finally answered, trying my best not to let my eyes roll back into my head when his hands skimmed over every inch of me beneath my jacket – up my sides, across my stomach, just barely beneath my breasts. I felt his smile against my neck before he opened his mouth to place a long, slow kiss there.

Reaching back, I slipped my fingers into his hair, only to turn my head and pull his mouth to mine. Damn, the man could kiss. He kissed like he played music – with a fiery passion, his whole soul, his hands everywhere, and with his heart right there on the surface of things. I wasn't even sure he knew he was like that, but I could see it, and I wanted to guard it with everything I had. It was just another glaring difference between Edward and the persona, Masen.

He pulled away from my lips just long enough to spin me to face him, cupping my face so gently. "You got a minute? Can you come upstairs?"

Grinning, I nodded a little. "Yeah, Tori's got the bar, but I can't leave her by herself for too long."

"No, no…just a few minutes. Believe me, I wish I had more time, but…" His smile was crooked and sexy and spoke of untold dirty things of which he was probably more than capable. Threading our fingers together, he led us to the stairs, where he used his free hand to pick up a few plastic bags that he'd left on the bottom step.

Once inside his apartment, he dropped the bags on his bed alongside his partially packed bag.

"You look almost ready," I pointed out, smiling at his shrug. "What time's your flight in the morning?"

"Seven."

"Want some help?"

He chuckled deeply, shaking his head. "No. C'mere," he said, leading me to the sofa. He sat down, pulling me between his legs. "I need to tell you… You might see…" He sighed heavily, his forehead falling to my stomach. "Bella, we're supposed to have a photo shoot while we're there, and we'll be attending some sort of…thing."

I raked my fingers through his hair as he mumbled into my stomach. Dropping a kiss to the top of his head and inhaling deeply, I said, "A thing, huh?"

He laughed, pulling back to gaze up at me. "Some charity concert thing that Rose and Aro added us onto at the last minute. Anyway…I just… If you see…"

"Stop, Edward." I hushed him by pressing my lips to his briefly. "I'm well aware that you've got a job to do." When he nodded, I asked, "Will you be gone longer, then?"

"No, angel. I'll be back on Thursday as planned."

"Well, that's good." I laughed a little. "I'll miss you plenty as it is."

Dear God, the smile that graced his handsome face was so damned beautiful. He was such a mix of rugged and hard, with his scruffy face, colorful ink, and hair that looked like he'd just pulled an all-night sex marathon. But combined with his almost boyish smile, gorgeous green eyes, and that tempting-as-all-hell blush, he was breathtaking.

"I don't want to go." His voice was firm, a little raspy. "I have no choice, though."

"It's okay. I'll be here when you get back."

He nodded, letting out a deep breath. "Promise me…whatever bullshit you see, you'll ask me about it before believing it."

"I promise." I giggled the vow, but I understood his concern. "What? Will you be draped in women or something?"

"Oh God, there's no telling. And Aro likes to drop hints to the paps, so…"

"That's cruel," I muttered, trailing my finger across the wrinkle between his heavy brow. "You hate that shit."

"I know, but I'll live."

"This Aro sounds like an opportunistic, money-hungry asshole," I grumbled, folding my arms across my chest. "I mean, I get certain aspects of your situation are…staged, but come on!"

"Shit, you're so fucking hot when you're pissed…" He placed his hands on either side of my face and kissed me until I relented, allowing him to pull me astride his lap. His tongue caused my thought process to completely vanish, but he pulled away too soon. "I may have to make you angry with me just to see that shit aimed my way." He grinned when I laughed. "It's okay, baby. Just…not much longer. And you're right about Aro; he is all those things, but this is our last album with him, or at least under this specific contract."

He touched my face, my arms, my hair the entire time he spoke, almost as if he was trying to brush away my temper.

"Speaking of contracts," I started, toying with the button on his shirt, simply to peek at the ink splashed across his chest. My fingers trailed the words "Thicker Than Water" over and over, and I wondered what caused such a permanent and concrete declaration of his loyalty to his family. "Rose was here this morning, and we went over what you guys are gonna do in the bar when you get back. And…" I swallowed back the emotions with what I was about to ask. "Are you… You're really going to perform one of my dad's songs?"

Edward smiled warmly. "If it hurts you, then no. But Jasper and I wanted to…we thought it fitting, not to mention we really love Charlie's music. We don't have to, angel."

"No, no," I whispered, blinking to stop the stinging in my eyes. "I think…I think he'd really love that you're doing it. And you… Your voice would be…_amazing_ on it."

"Oh, she told you which song?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Did you know that one was about me?"

Edward grinned. "No shit? Now I _really_ need to sing it."

I merely shook my head because I couldn't imagine just how absolutely perfect that would sound. Despite Radiant Eclipse's heavy genre, Edward's voice was gorgeous. Honestly, he could sing anything, never mind how talented Jasper was on lead guitar.

"You're upset… Shit, I… We won't, Bella." He reached up and caught the tears that had leaked from my eyes.

"No! Not at all. I just…" I sighed, smiling a little. "I miss him, so hearing you sing it would make me very happy."

He visibly relaxed at that, a hint of pink coloring his cheeks. "Okay."

That blush, that undeniably adorable blush, made me lean in and kiss him. When Tanya had pointed out Edward's sweet tell, I'd started watching for it. It was rare, and it happened at times I wouldn't have expected with Edward, considering all he'd done and seen in his life, but I had noticed that it was more with me than anyone else.

Our kiss was slow, deep, making me practically melt into him, but when we both pulled away, I smiled down at him. "I need to get back to the bar, and you have packing to do."

He groaned like a belligerent teen. "Dammit."

I giggled at him, fighting his grasp on me as I stood up from his lap. "You've got time, Edward, so come down when you're done, if you want. You'll have earned a beer."

He laughed but stood up to guide me to his door. "Yes, ma'am."

On the way out, I caught sight of a few framed pictures I that were new, and I stopped in front of the bookshelf.

"My family," he said softly, pointing to each person. "Mom, Dad, Emmett, and me… That was…oh hell, ten years ago? These are more recent…Christmas a couple years back."

Nodding, I studied the pictures. I could see where Edward and Emmett got their looks. Both were handsome and built like their father, tall with broad shoulders, though Emmett was a bit thicker, more muscular. Edward got his eye and hair color from their mom. They were a beautiful family. However, when I faced Edward, his face had taken on that dark look again.

"There's something you're not telling me," I whispered, kissing his lips to let him know I wasn't pushing.

"Jesus, Bella… It's such a long, fucked-up story. I will, but can I do it when I get back?"

"You don't _have_ to…"

He kissed me roughly, pressing his forehead to mine. "I really do, and I really want you to know, but I know it'll take time to tell you. And it's important that it stay between us."

Nodding, I smiled. "Okay." I pulled him behind me on my way to the door.

"Can I… Can I call you while I'm away?"

"Absolutely. In fact, I'd be upset if you didn't," I told him, receiving another award-winning kiss.

"Yeah?" he asked in a breathy whisper against my lips.

Grinning, I nodded. "Yeah."

He guided me out the door, saying, "Well, we can't have that. I may take you up on the beer, angel. See you in a few."

I could see how tired he was, how he wasn't looking forward to this trip at all, and it wouldn't surprise me or hurt my feelings if the poor thing crashed tonight before having to get up way early.

"If I don't see you," I started, kissing his cheek, "have a safe trip, Edward."

**~oOo~**

"Hey, B! Your boyfriend's on TV," Mike called out from the other side of the bar.

We weren't quite open yet, and he was doing his homework while I checked inventory. My head snapped up so fast from the list of boxes Garrett was checking in that my neck creaked a little. My eyes drank in the sight of the person I'd been missing. It actually shocked me just _how much_ I missed Edward since he'd left three days ago. He was due back tonight, and he couldn't get here quickly enough. Though, I had to admit, talking to a sleepy, sexy Edward on the phone while he hid away in his hotel room was way too addictive. He was funny and silly, making fun of all the strange L.A. people he'd come into contact with over the last couple of days, and we'd talked about anything and nothing.

Occasionally, he'd sneak a picture on his phone, sending it with some random comment. I think my favorite was the selfie he took with Emmett, who was sleeping so hard in a meeting that he was drooling, and attached to it was the text, _Some bodyguard, huh?_

However, up on the TV that my brother was now turning up was Masen…not my Edward. He was in full work mode, and the gossip show was discussing the photo shoot for Radiant Eclipse's new album cover. His face was almost cold, a little conceited, and a whole lot sexy. And even though I'd teased him about being draped in women for the pictures, I had to admit that seeing it come to fruition made me a touch jealous. Although, his expression was so detached from it all that I knew poor Edward was hating every second of it, and I noted he wasn't the only one – both Alec and Jasper were pretty stoic in the pictures, as well.

The show went on to show more clips of the band getting their pictures taken, a few shots of them arriving via limo, not to mention a quick spot of them arriving at a club the night they'd arrived – that one was conspicuously missing Edward in it, and I knew for a fact he'd been at his hotel room talking to me. The last was the concert from the previous evening, where Radiant Eclipse was a surprise performance, much to the audience's glee. It was a cancer awareness concert, and they sounded amazing, playing a couple of older songs and one new one that they'd announced would be on the new album coming soon. The guys had sounded good, and _Masen_ had worked the crowd, the women in the front row, and the camera with his usual bold and sexy nature.

"What a fucking prick that guy is," I heard from the door to the kitchen, and I looked up to see Garrett glaring at the TV with a scowl on his face.

"Jealous much, dude?" Mike laughed, but Garrett ignored him. "Masen's all right. He's actually pretty…normal. What'choo so pissed off for? I thought you were seeing some chick you met online."

"Not online…you little shit," Garrett snapped, rolling his eyes. "My class reunion…we've been chatting online, though," he mumbled, shrugging a shoulder.

My eyebrows shot up at that, but I merely smiled, going back to the show. I frowned at the street shots that the paparazzi had snagged of Edward, Jasper, and Jacob, along with Emmett as protection. It looked like they were simply trying to get to a restaurant or club, but they'd been ambushed by not only photographers, but female fans, as well. I had to grin when the door of the limo opened again and long legs and beautiful faces appeared. Tanya and Kate, the former carrying what looked to be a bottle of Jack Daniels, walked straight to Edward and wrapped themselves around him. Jasper was joined by Alice, and Jacob flirted with a few of the fans. If I didn't know better, I would've been unnerved at the blatant touching, the drinking, and the salacious aura Edward was giving off, but Tanya and Kate were fantastic.

"What the fuck do you see in that guy, Bella?" Garrett asked, taking the chair across from me.

"Actually, Garrett," I started, tearing my gaze away from the show as the credits rolled, "there's more than just what you see."

"He's gonna fuck you over, baby. I would…"

"Don't call me that, Gare. I'm asking nicely," I reprimanded him, but I folded my arms on top of my paperwork and looked him dead in the eye. "I get this…_thing_ you're doing, but I don't need it." When he didn't say anything, I asked, "Who's the online girl?"

He smirked, leaning back in the chair. "What? You care?"

"We're friends, Garrett. Of course, I care."

"Maggie. She's…I knew her a long time ago. Seeing her again…was good."

I studied my ex for a moment, finally breaking into a smile. "Good for you."

"She wants the whole shebang, Bella," he admitted, fiddling with papers in front of him. "Marriage, kids…" He trailed off, but I could hear the accusatory tone in his voice.

"I want those things, too."

"Just not with me," he tacked on to the end.

"Garrett," I groaned, and I rubbed my face in frustration. "It wouldn't have worked, sweetie. _We_ wouldn't have worked…not like that."

I despised hurting him, so I refused to reiterate how settled and boring we'd become at the end, and the mere thought of tying myself to that through marriage and children would have been a huge mistake, especially when I knew for a fact he'd felt the same. I knew he'd never cheat. It simply wasn't the way he worked, and I knew he cared about me, because he'd stuck by my side the entire process of my dad's death. Despite the fact that I cared about him, it wasn't enough. And his kisses never lit me on fire the way that Edward's kisses did. That alone told me so much.

"I know," he groaned, shaking his head, but he cracked a small smile. "I know that, sweet girl. Now, anyway. I didn't want to hear it, but…"

Narrowing my eyes at him, I broke into a light chuckle. "Someone's in love."

"I'm not the only one, apparently," he noted sarcastically, pointing a finger my way. "Watch yourself, Bella."

"He's not what you see, Garrett." I shook my head but cracked a smile when my phone vibrated across the table. Edward's handsome face lit up the screen, and I answered it on speakerphone. "Hey…there's the party animal."

Edward's snort of disgust echoed through the bar, and Mike laughed a little from his stool.

"Such bullshit, angel," he stated. "Let me guess… You saw that damn show."

"We were all watching it," I told him. "I think I won some sort of bet about your photo shoot."

"Yeah, you did," he sighed deeply. "I'll show you the proofs when I get back, Bella. They're not bad, but I had to fight to stay dressed. You wouldn't believe what they wanted us to do. Just…no. The show was the best part of this trip, though. We were able to raise close to twenty grand with just our appearance. The boys and I matched it."

"Nice!" I praised him, eyeing Garrett. "And the club?"

"Another paid appearance, baby. That's all. Luckily, Tanya and Kate were able to help us out, and they wanted to go dancing anyway. Though, they got a little trashed…okay, _a lot_ trashed. And they started making out on the dance floor; Jasper and I had to get them out. They said to tell you hello, by the way," he said with a light laugh. "And that they'll gladly – and I quote – 'swat away the clingy fame-whores just for you.'"

I couldn't help but laugh, taking the phone off speaker and saying, "Tell them hello…and thank you." I laughed even harder when I heard him call out over the phone; even funnier were the yells and cheers back to me. "Where are you?"

Edward laughed softly. "The airport. We're getting ready to head back to Seattle. I just… I… I missed you."

"Me, too."

"Are you closing tonight?"

"I am, and by myself, at that. Tori has the night off and Garrett apparently has a hot date," I said with a cheesy smile Garrett's way, but he rolled his eyes as he got up, shaking the inventory pages at me before going into the back.

"Good. He needs someone…"

Grinning, I shook my head at the testosterone I was having to endure today. "Yes, I agree."

"He was listening, I take it," Edward sighed with a laugh.

"Uh, yeah… You should know that your publicity works on most people. He wasn't pleased with your display."

"He won't be the last, Bella," he warned.

"You still expect me to run."

He was quiet for a moment. "No, I don't think so, but it's a worry, angel. And this was the easy part… Going on tour will be…fucking hard. We got the list of cities…"

"I own my bar, Edward. I can take time off."

"Don't fucking tease, Bella…"

I laughed because if I didn't, I'd beg him to keep talking dirty to me. "I'm not teasing, so…come home. We'll talk about it."

"O-Okay," he stuttered. "The flight's just under three hours, and I'm supposed to go to a meeting…"

"I'll be here."

We said our goodbyes, and I hung up just in time for my mother to pick up Mike. She was busy on the phone, making plans for something or other, so she didn't stay long. I helped Garrett put away the bottles he was taking out of the boxes that had just come in, and he left not long after. It would be a quiet night, but I had music, TV, and paperwork to keep me occupied.

A few guests from the hotel came in for a quick drink but departed after leaving me a healthy tip. I was halfway through a train-wreck of a reality show when the door opened again. Edward was due to land any minute, and I wouldn't see him for another couple of hours after that, but I couldn't help but hope. However, I wasn't expecting the person who stepped into my bar.

I recognized the face from the framed pictures Edward had shown me, but seeing Dr. Cullen in person was a little surreal. Even more, I could see he'd already had a few before coming in.

"Hi. Welcome in. What can I get you?" I offered, setting down a coaster for him at the bar.

"I'll take a vodka tonic," he answered, but as he took his seat, he narrowed his eyes at me. "Are you Bella Swan?"

"I am," I said with a smile, holding out my hand, which he took in a firm shake.

"I'm Carlisle Cullen. I think you know my son?"

"I do." I smiled his way, but he simply sipped his drink for a moment, looking around my bar.

"I was told he lives here," he mumbled, shaking his head, but he knocked back the drink and set the empty glass down. "Another, please."

"He does…in the apartment upstairs, but I'm afraid he won't be back for a few hours," I explained, pouring him another. Something about the way he was chugging them told me something wasn't right with Edward's dad. And I was pretty sure it was why Edward didn't talk much to the man sitting in front of me. "You can wait, if you'd like."

He thanked me and asked for the bottle, sliding a credit card my way. With a heavy heart, I did as he asked. He drank in silence, but I could feel his eyes on me, even when a few more hotel guests came in for a pitcher of beer and the score of the football game. When I caught a split second to dart into the kitchen, I pulled out my phone and dialed Edward.

"Good timing, angel," he answered with such a sweet, happy sound that I hated to even tell him. "We just landed…"

"Edward…" I started but then paused for a second.

"Bella? Baby, what's wrong?"

"Um, is there any way you can miss your meeting?"

"Yes," he said slowly. "I can go tomorrow night, but I was hoping to hang out with you all day."

Smiling a little at that, I sighed, "Edward… Sweetie, your dad's in my bar…and he's slowly drinking himself to oblivion."

"Fuck me to tears!" he snapped. "What's he said to you? Has he been an ass, Bella?" I heard him pull the phone away for a second, calling Rose and Emmett. "Bella…has he said anything?"

"No, he's just…quiet. Edward, he's _really_ drunk, but he came here looking for you. I…I told him he could wait, but…" I started to think I'd done the wrong thing, because Edward let a string of curses out of his mouth. "I didn't know what else to do…"

"Shit, Bella…you did nothing wrong. I'm not yelling at you. Okay?" he said softly.

"I know, but what do you want me to do? I can't let him drive."

"No! Definitely not. Is he close by?"

"Yeah, I'll get him."

I stepped out to the bar again, holding out my phone to Dr. Cullen. "It's Edward for you."

Carlisle's eyebrows scrunched up a little at that, but he took my phone with a shaky hand. "Son…"

I could hear Edward's voice, but it wasn't loud enough to understand.

"No, son, I'll be here. No, she's… Right. Okay." His words were a little slurred, but he seemed to sober up at whatever his son was telling him. He actually looked slightly scared. He handed the phone back to me. "He wants to speak to you again."

Nodding, I put the phone to my ear. "Edward?"

"Cut him off, Bella. I'm begging you. Close out his tab and give him coffee or some shit. Please?"

"Okay, sweetie. Is everything…"

"Fuck, I just wanted to come home to you…that's it. I wanted to kiss you stupid and help you close the bar so you weren't alone, maybe talk on my couch until we fell asleep," he rambled and then laughed humorlessly. It was a harsh sound but filled with understandable frustration.

"Hey…I'm still here. No running. And my couch is just as comfy…and one staircase closer."

"Thanks, angel." There was the sweet chuckle I needed.

"Yup." I sighed deeply, saying, "Okay, I'll cash him out and make coffee. How long until you get here?"

I heard him update Emmett and Rose and then what sounded like a cab driver's voice before he finally said, "I'm on my way."

The call ended, and I tucked the phone away. I turned to Dr. Cullen, whose head was in one hand. The other held his empty glass.

Gently, I took the glass away, smiling at him. "What'cha say to a cup of coffee, Dr. Cullen?"

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… For those of you that guessed that Edward was avoiding his dad…yes. Unfortunately, Dad came looking. We will be back in Edward's POV with the next chapter.**

**Not really any questions this time. Well, at least none that I can answer without spoiling things. ;) **

**One thing I will tell you… Chainsaw Charlie… If you're wondering what his sound was like, think Stevie Ray Vaughan. If you don't know him, look up "Pride and Joy" or "Little Wing" or "Look at Little Sister." It's blues/rock at its best, and kind of the sound I had in my head when I think of Charlie.**

**Okay, all links for pics are on my profile. My playlist is on YouTube. The next update will be Sunday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	9. Question All You Trust

**A/N… I won't keep you here. I know most of you are ready to see what happens with Edward and his dad. See me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 9 – Question All You Trust**

_Walk the razor's edge  
Cut into the madness  
Question all you trust  
Buy into the fear  
I see the man ripping at my soul now  
I, I know the man  
I know him all too well_

_There's nothing here for free_  
_Lost who I want to be_  
_My serpent blood can strike so cold_  
_On any given day_  
_I'll take it all away_  
_Another thought I can't control_

"_This Means War" – Avenged Sevenfold_

**EDWARD**

The city of Seattle blurred outside the window of the cab. My phone was almost dead from the texts I was receiving from Emmett. Apparently, he was heading to our mother, who had called him about the same time that Bella had called me, while I had to go clean up the mess that was our dad. Something had happened between them; we just didn't know what.

My forehead thumped softly to the car window. I hadn't been lying to Bella. All I'd wanted the entire time I was in L.A. was to come back and just see her. With her, I didn't have to put on any act, didn't have to hide behind a mask of indifference. That last thought made me close my eyes. That wall of indifference I'd had to wear for so long had started to become a part of me, and it _wasn't_ me. And knowing my dad was sitting in Bella's bar, saying who knew what, that indifference meshed into anger.

If he said something to hurt her, if he offended her in any fucking way, I didn't know if I could control myself. She was too sweet, too important to me to have him come in and destroy the barely thererelationship I wanted so damned badly.

My phone bleeped, signaling that my battery was just about gone, but it bleeped again with a message from Bella.

_I closed the bar early, Edward. Come in the back door._

I wanted to ask a billion questions, but just as I started to type back, the phone died in my hand.

"Fuck," I sighed to myself but sat up when we pulled into the alley.

I paid the fare, getting out of the cab and dragging my bag behind me. The back door to the bar was unlocked, but I remedied that as soon as I was inside. I dropped my bag on the floor, following the sound of two voices I'd recognize anywhere – Bella and my dad.

Bella's tone was her usual calm and cool sound. It was light, with an easy laugh mixed in. My dad still sounded a little drunk, but at least he was forming complete sentences.

"My boys hate me, Bella."

"Oh, that can't be true," she countered gently. "My mother and I don't see eye to eye on everything, but I don't hate her. She doesn't like what I do for a living, but it keeps me close to my dad. She wants me to finish school, but I'm happy where I am. She voices her opinion, and I voice mine. We keep going."

"But I'd be willing to bet your mother never used you," my dad stated, and while that was probably cryptic to Bella, I knew exactly what he was saying. My Bella, however, never even flinched.

Her laugh was soft. "Oh, now…I suppose that depends on your definition of 'using,'" she started, and I peeked through the door to see her leaning on the bar in front of him, holding a coffee cup in her two small hands. "I was seven when my brother was born – my half-brother – so…instant babysitter. There were days I fed him, bathed him, dressed him…all on my own." She paused to sip her coffee. "My mother and father never stopped loving each other; they were simply toxic together. So she'd pump me for information when I'd come home from a weekend with him. Sad part? There was nothing to report. My dad worked – sometimes music, sometimes this bar – but he never moved on from my mother like she'd done with my stepfathers. And that seemed to push my mother over some edge. She didn't understand why they didn't work, but I don't think she ever looked in the mirror – she never accepted my dad for who and what he was; she only wanted to mold him into something he wasn't, something he could never be.

"As you can see, he was an open, free spirit." She pointed around her bar. "He was extraordinarily talented. He saw music in the air around him, but he couldn't remember to tell me to brush my teeth or get me to school on time. He was calm and so easy to talk to, but he'd disappear for days in his studio to write music, hardly stopping to eat or sleep, so he wasn't able to be a husband and father on a full-time basis. He wanted to but knew he'd fail. He told me that a hundred times, so it was something he'd come to terms with, but not everyone can accept themselves like that. Like my mother, who still doesn't really know that he loved her enough to let her go."

"You were her pawn in a game of chess," my dad pointed out, and my eyes shot to him. He was a touch more sober than he'd probably been a few hours ago.

"A bit, yeah. The problem is…I am a combo of both of my parents, so I've accepted who I am, but I'm not afraid to tell her. My poor brother isn't so lucky. He's constantly caught up in her wants and needs. I hope that changes when he's finally eighteen in a few weeks."

My dad was quiet for a second, but he seemed to be studying my girl intently. I almost walked on in, but he spoke my name so softly, it was barely a whisper.

"Edward…" He sighed, shaking his head. "Maybe you're right. Maybe he doesn't hate me. Perhaps it's disappointment, which is quite worse, really. He's so talented, so smart. I wanted more for him than what he does. He could've been—"

"Have you actually _watched_ what he does?" Bella asked, and I could tell she was bristling a little at him, which wasn't a shock, simply because she was so damned protective of me, but he didn't answer her. "He's amazing. What difference does the genre of music make when the outcome still brings people to some sort of emotion? My dad played rock and blues, but he used to dance with me when I went through a boy-band phase."

Grinning, I shook my head, secretly reminding myself to tease that sweet thing about that particular phase sometime in the future.

"What I mean is… Your son touches people on a level that I don't think you understand. His fans _love him_. And he and Jasper have been recognized as one of the most powerful music-writing teams out there. He's busted his ass to earn all of it, even if he's had to put on a false face to get it done. There's absolutely _nothing_ to be ashamed of there, and if you are, then you're missing out."

She spun around at the same time I stepped through the kitchen door. Her eyes widened, but then she glanced back over her shoulder and then back to me worriedly. "I'm glad you're back safe… He's um…"

I wanted to kiss the living shit out of her, but I had to focus on my dad. What I did do was press a long kiss to her forehead for so many reasons I could barely speak – for what she'd just said about me, for taking care of my dad, and for just being Bella.

"Missed you, angel," was all I whispered to against her hair.

"Me, too… I'm sorry."

I gave her a small smile, wrinkling my brow and shaking my head. She had no need to apologize, especially not to me. When I stepped to the bar, I eyed my father.

"Let's get you upstairs to my place, Dad," I said with barely controlled anger. "You've bothered Bella enough for one night."

"He wasn't…" she started but smirked a little when I shot her a quick look.

"Son, I—"

"Upstairs, then we'll talk. That is, if you don't pass the fuck out on me," I told him, walking around to wrap his arm around my shoulders. He may have sobered up a little, but he was still a bit wobbly.

"Your mother knows, Edward," he mumbled, leaning against me. "I think she may leave me."

"Yeah, well… We'll deal with it," I sighed deeply, my heart hurting.

Shit had now gotten way out of hand, but there was a part of me that was glad my mother knew the truth. My father brought all of this stuff on himself, but as we followed Bella out the back of the bar, I wondered if my helping him hadn't simply postponed the inevitable. What I'd done by taking his place when he'd had the car accident had only pushed off what probably needed to happen naturally. After being in rehab, I knew that labeled me an enabler, but the pure fear on my dad's face that night had scared me. I'd felt sorry for him. Now I knew I couldn't do it again. He had to face it this time, no matter how hard it was.

Bella reached for my bag that I'd set by the door, but I said, "Leave it, Bella. I can get it tomorrow."

She simply smiled sadly, hoisting the damn thing onto her shoulder. "I've got this. You've got a heavier load."

Fuck, she knew. I could see that she was now putting pieces of the puzzle together. If not, she knew that something just wasn't quite right.

"I wanted to… But I…" I started, but she quickly kissed my lips.

"This isn't about me, Edward. Go. I'll follow you up," she whispered, gesturing toward the stairs.

It took a few stumbles to get up three flights, and my father had gotten awfully quiet, but I could see he was watching me, only to glance back to Bella.

"Don't say it," I warned him. "You're in deep shit with me, so you might want to focus on yourself right this second."

I opened my apartment door, wishing my homecoming was so very fucking different. I wanted the girl behind me in my arms, not my dad. Guiding him straight inside, I helped him sit on the sofa, turning to see a nervous Bella placing my bag on my bed.

She shifted on her feet but then smiled a little. "I'll leave you two to talk. I _am_ glad you're home, though."

I didn't say a word but walked straight to her, taking her hand and pulling her out my front door. Pulling her to me, my hands sank into her soft hair as I moved her mouth to mine. I needed her like I'd never needed anything in my life, but the timing was fucking off. I was a frenzy of teeth and tongue and lips. Bella, however, slowed us down, pulling back just enough to smile at me.

"Edward, look at me," she commanded in a whisper, and when I met those dark eyes that brought me comfort and safety, I wasn't disappointed. I was shocked it was still there, actually, when I thought she'd be pissed or filled with pity, but I saw none of that. "I'm still not running," she vowed, her brow wrinkling as she studied my face. Her fingers trailed along my jawline to pull me in for a light kiss. "Still here. Still right downstairs if you need me."

"I need you now." My voice was raspy, my breathing heavy, because I truly wanted this girl in every damn way. "I want…"

"Me, too," she agreed with a smile, "but he needs you more. And I don't want us using that as a way of just…escaping."

"I'm sorry… I shouldn't have said anything."

She grinned, biting her lip just a little before shaking her head. "I'm not sorry you said it. Maybe a little disappointed in the timing."

Groaning, I let my forehead fall to hers as everything bubbled up out of me. "Fuck, Bella… I don't know what to do with him. And I know you don't know anything, but—"

"Edward, he's your dad. He was drinking himself stupid because he thinks you and Emmett hate him. I know you don't. I can see it all over this handsome face," she said, brushing my hair off my forehead. "He has to want to change, even if the catalyst is you being very pissed off at him."

Smirking a little, I nodded. "You'd have made a damn sexy therapist."

Her giggle was soft as she rolled her eyes at me and pushed me back a bit. "But I pour a mean beer."

"You do…_way_ more than that, angel." I held her shoulders to make sure she was looking my way. "I'll never be able to repay you for all you've done for me since I met you. Never."

"I don't need repaying," she said firmly, but her smile was sweet as she leaned in to kiss me. "I don't regret a single thing." She kissed me again, slowly, deeply making me moan in want of her, but she finally stepped back. "Did you mean what you said?"

"Which part?" I asked, trying not to reach out and simply take her. "The sexy therapist? Yes."

Her laugh started with an adorable snort, but she covered her mouth. "No, silly ass…about coming home to just hang out?"

"God, Bella. It was all I could think about while I was away," I told her with a slow shake of my head.

"Tomorrow, then?" she offered, pointing toward my door. "You know, after you've…"

"It's a date," I vowed, smiling at her. "Tomorrow. I'll come down when he's gone. He'll most likely sleep this shit off…"

"Okay," she said softly, kissing me one more time. "Night, Edward."

"Night, angel."

She stopped before she took the first step down, turning to face me. "You might want to get some pain killers and water in him before he crashes out, Edward. That way, tomorrow won't be so…harsh."

Grinning, I shrugged. "Says the beautiful bartender. Harsh seems oddly satisfying at the moment, Bella, but you're right."

She wrinkled her nose but smiled before leaving. I waited until she was safely inside her own apartment before turning to go back inside my door. I was hit with curses and yelling that my dad was trying to keep down.

"Yes, Esme, I know! I'm aware," he snapped in a hiss, his hand raking through his hair in a rare show of stress. "Here…you can talk to Edward."

He thrust his cell phone at me, and I put it to my ear. "Mom…"

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen! I can't believe you falsified a police report, that you covered for that…that—"

"Mom!" I practically growled into the phone, finally remembering my own was dead. As I plugged it in on my nightstand, my heart broke at the sound of my mother's sobs, Emmett's and Rose's voices consoling her, and my dad's drunken grumbles. I turned to him first. "You…shut up. If you'd told her about this from the beginning, you wouldn't be here. If you'd recognize that you have a fucking problem, none of us would be in this mess. You're a goddamn doctor, for fuck sake! You of all people should've known the damn signs. And Mom," I spoke over the line, "I'd have done the same for you, so don't even start with me. You live with the man, and you didn't see it?"

My dad stared at me, wide-eyed and quiet again, but I walked off to the bathroom to grab a bottle of aspirin and then into my kitchen for a bottle of water. I thrust both at him while I waited for my mother to calm down. I sat down hard on the other sofa, listening to Rose's kind voice soothing her. However, my brother was ranting in the background. When I glanced up to my father, he was taking the medicine with the water, letting his head fall back.

"Do you know why I helped you that night, Dad?" I asked him, and he wearily lifted his head back to look at me, but I could also hear my mother sniffle softly in my ear. "I told you the other night at the coffee shop that it was because what you do is important, that I could get away with it due to my reputation. All that's true, but…I thought that if I did it, if I cushioned this shit for you, that you'd see I wasn't a fuck-up."

"I don't think you're a fuck-up, Edward," Dad argued.

"Yet, you tell Bella you think Emmett and I hate you."

"Who's Bella?" my mother whispered on the other end.

"Edward's new girl," Emmett answered with a chuckle. "She's pretty damn awesome."

When my dad looked down shamefully, I said, "We don't hate you. We just wanted something different than you. You seemed to take that as an insult, as something personal."

"But you could've…" he started, and I stopped him by holding up my hand.

"I don't want to hear it. Not anymore. What's done is done. I can't go back and change anything about my life, not that I'd want to, because I have no regrets, except that my career choice drove a wedge between us. And even that isn't my problem; it's yours. I'm good at what I do, my band is good, and I can't take it back. Writing music and being on the stage is everything to me, and even though I have to be someone else occasionally to get the job done, all that bullshit fades away as soon as the spotlight falls on me, as soon as I play that first damn note. And Emmett _asked_ to come with me, Dad, so it was his choice, too."

I sighed, rubbing my face. I felt tired and sad, not to mention dirty from being on a plane. I wanted a shower, and I wanted sleep, but mostly, I wanted to bolt down the stairs to Bella in order to wrap her up and bury all this shit in something good, something that wasn't tainted by lies and alcohol and misunderstanding. Nothing sounded as good as losing myself in her, showing her how amazing she made me feel. In the last several weeks since I'd met her, my life had changed dramatically, and I owed it to her. Despite the situation I was in at the moment, things weren't so hard, because she was in my life.

Laughing softly behind my hand, I realized I'd fallen head over fucking heels for the pretty brunette, the brave little thing who had saved my ass from the paparazzi, who'd let me stumble into her life, only to bring chaos and anarchy with me, wrapping me up in her arms.

That realization made me want to rush to her, tell her how amazing she was to me…_for me_, but I knew it was too soon. However, the memory of her telling me she wanted me too was so vivid in my mind. For years, my life was fast-paced, threaded with scattered moments of instant gratification. With Heidi, it had been the same way – a relationship hidden behind a curtain of lies. With Bella, I wanted it all – to bring her on tour, to come home to her, to show her the world, and to prove I could be Edward with her…not Masen, not some puppet-type manifestation created for the masses. I didn't want instant gratification; I wanted to show her how she made me a better person, how she allowed me to surface above the bullshit.

Sighing deeply, I forced it all away to focus on the problem at hand. "I'm done, Dad. If you want help, then we'll help you. But I'm not doing this anymore. You're gonna end up killing yourself or someone else, whether in a car or at the damn hospital, and I won't contribute to it. Consider this your intervention. Take it or leave it." I stood up, still keeping my dad's phone to my ear. "I have one more month of required AA meetings before I'm cleared of something _you_ did. I'll finish it because I'd promised I would, and I'll get it done before the band goes on tour.

"And Mom?" I said into the phone. "I'm sorry we lied. I'm sorry that we kept the truth from you, but it was kind of a touchy thing, and we didn't want you caught up in it. We did it to protect you…up to a point. Once the charges were settled in court, I told Dad to tell you, but he was scared."

"That's no excuse," she argued.

"Actually, it kinda is, Mom," I countered, shaking my head. "We had to make it look a certain way. The deed is done. Where the arrest and rehab barely touched my reputation, it would've ruined Dad's and yours. It was hard to say no when he was begging for help, Mom, and I could have, but I didn't. That's on me. I made him promise to get help, to go to the meetings with me, but he didn't. That's on him. But ignoring it all while it was right under your nose…that's on you. We're all fucking wrong."

"Edward," my mother started over the line.

"I tried to help, no matter how fucking twisted it became…"

"Language, Edward…" my mother whispered, but it was a half-assed reprimand.

"Sorry," I muttered, raking a hand through my hair. "I'm so damn tired of living for everyone else. I'm tired of lying. I'm not an alcoholic, I'm not a wild party animal, and I'm not sleeping with every girl in the fucking Pacific Northwest. There's only one girl, who's right downstairs, and she's the only one I haven't lied to, but I don't need to lie to her. I just want her and music. Anything outside of that is superfluous."

My dad was watching me with a curious expression, nervously wringing his hands.

"I love you both, but you two have to figure this out on your own, together, with rehab, with a damn priest for all I care, but I can't anymore. I've got enough shit to do."

I tossed the phone at my dad, getting my keys out. "I'm gonna get some air. You can stay here if you want. Let me know what you decide."

For a moment, I wondered if he'd even remember this shit come morning, but I knew my mother would. I also knew Rose and Emmett could handle some of it. I walked out of my apartment, rumbling down the stairs. I paused for a moment in front of Bella's door but kept going down and into the alley. I knew I needed to talk to her, explain everything, but I also knew that if I set eyes on her at the moment, I'd lose my shit. I wanted her with an intensity that would probably scare her, and I'd be doing it for all the wrong reasons. Like she'd said…an escape.

Starting for my car, I changed my mind and just kept walking as I pulled a wool cap down on my head from the pocket of my jacket.

**~oOo~**

I have no idea how long I walked or how far. I lost myself in my head, in music notes that begged to be written, in how my life got really fucking screwed up.

A few hours had gone by when I realized I'd left my phone back at my apartment, but I couldn't care less. Glancing around, I saw I'd ended up at the water. Falling down on the closest bench, I tried to quiet my mind. It didn't work, though it was better than before.

It was well past midnight when I finally made my way back. I was fucking exhausted, but my mind was still going. Rushing by Bella's door in order not to just…break it down to get to her, I went back in my own apartment. It was dark and quiet, except for the sounds of my father's soft snore on my sofa. Though he'd probably sleep through a hurricane, I grabbed my acoustic guitar and took it back outside in order to let him sleep. Sitting down on the top step, I leaned back against the railing to pick softly.

I played whatever came to mind – random notes, parts of songs that I'd tested but never written down, even some of Chainsaw Charlie's songs.

I never heard her approach. Hell, I didn't even see her come up the stairs, but suddenly the gorgeous brunette angel was standing a few steps down, putting her almost at eye level from my seat on the landing. My eyes raked up soft plaid pajama pants, to an oversized T-shirt with an amazing Fender emblem on it, and finally to the sweetest face on the damn planet.

"You might be the sexiest thing I've ever seen," I muttered, grinning when she glanced down at herself and raised a deadly eyebrow at me. "Just fucking perfect."

"You okay?" she asked, ignoring my idiotic rambling, and when I nodded, she shifted a little on her feet, but she wasn't exactly dressed to be outside in the chilly weather.

"C'mere," I whispered, setting my guitar aside and opening my leather jacket. She sat down crossways on my lap, and I wrapped my coat and my arms around her. "Better?"

She nodded, practically melting against me, but she spoke softly. "You didn't answer me. Are you okay, Edward?"

"I am now," I sighed truthfully, burying my face in her neck.

"I um… I need… Edward, you should know…I heard you?" she said, but it came out like a question as she pulled back to look me in the eye. "I didn't mean to, but…the sound carried… You were sort of…yelling," she admitted, her nose wrinkling.

I shrugged a shoulder. "I wanted to tell you anyway, but…"

"You…" she started, pausing to frown a little as her fingers trailed across my face. "You…went to jail for him? You took his place?"

"Yeah…I couldn't… I shouldn't have, but he's my _dad_, Bella. I looked up to him my whole fucking life, and to see him so fucking scared…" I knew my voice sounded pleading, sounded like a little kid talking like he hero-worshiped his daddy, but of all the damn people in the world, _she_ was the one who I needed to understand.

"That…" She started, seeming to struggle with her words, but she finally kissed me softly. "That was stupid and brave and sweet and terrible and…and…"

"You could've stopped at stupid, angel."

She cracked a smile. "So that's what he meant when he said he was using you. That must've been scary."

I shrugged, holding her closer, my hands rubbing up and down her side on the outside of her shirt but still trying to keep her inside my jacket. "I've been arrested before, baby, for disorderly conduct…a party in a hotel after a show got a tad bit out of hand," I said with a smirk. "But I was let go and never charged. Once we knew no one – aside from Bree – had been hurt, and she had only minor injuries, the rest was no big deal for me."

"I meant scary over what it could have done to your family," she said softly, reaching up and tugging the wool cap off my head to rake her fingers through my hair.

I stared at her for a moment. "Yes."

She glanced behind me to my door and then met my eyes. "What's he gonna do?"

"I don't know," I sighed, loosening my hold on her in order to put my cap on her head to keep her warm. I smoothed her hair back. "It's up to him. I've done too much…"

She nodded sadly, tilting her head at me and placing her hand on my chest. "Yeah, but it came from a good place, Edward."

"Maybe, but we're back to square one."

"No, you aren't. Baby, he came to you before going anywhere else. Something you've done, something you're doing is getting through."

"I hope so."

"You know…he didn't drive. He took a cab here to find you." My eyebrows shot up at that, but I didn't say anything as she cupped either side of my face. "Can I tell you something?" she asked, like I'd ever tell her no, and I told her yes. "You've done more than enough. Maybe too much, but it's okay to back off. It doesn't mean you don't love him, or that you don't care, but he really does have to do this for himself, Edward."

Nodding, I let out a long breath. She was right, of course. I knew she was. I pulled her back to me, nuzzling my face into her neck again. But I had to smile when her whole body vibrated with the shivers.

"C'mon, let's get you back inside before your toes freeze off or something." Slipping my arm underneath her knees, I stood with her cradled against my chest.

"Your guitar…" she said, reaching out and picking it up with a grin. "You shouldn't leave it out here."

Shaking my head at her, I smiled and walked down to her apartment door. I expected her to reach for the door knob, but when I gazed down at her, I could see her eyes were locked on my chest. She didn't get down out of my arms, though.

"Edward, I…" she started, swallowing nervously as she gripped the sleeve of my jacket with her free hand, and I took the guitar from her and leaned it against the wall. "When I said your voice carried downstairs, it meant that I heard…_everything_ you said…"

"What'd you hear that's making you not want to look at me, angel? You've heard the worst, the lies, and the family fight. What more is there?" I teased her, leaning in to kiss her cheek, but I froze when I remembered what I'd said at the end. "Oh…"

"Did you mean it?" she whispered as I lightly dragged my lips down her cheek. "About me? About there being only one girl…downstairs?"

Smiling against the spot just below her ear, I whispered, "Yes, angel." I knew was pushing it – myself and the situation, simply because my want for her had not abated on my long walk – when I opened my mouth to her skin to taste salty-sweet. "Fuck, Bella, I…"

I tasted and kissed along her neck, teasing her earlobe with my tongue and teeth.

"Take me inside, Edward," she commanded, and I pulled back to look at her, thinking I'd pushed too far, but she grasped my face in both hands and kissed me. "I've changed my mind," she whimpered against my mouth.

"About what, baby?" I groaned, because sweet mother of fuck, she was killing me with her voice, her kisses, her fingers in my hair, never mind how ridiculously adorable she was in PJs and my wool cap.

"Maybe we do need that escape…"

My forehead thumped to hers. "You have to mean that, Bella. My control around you is slipping."

She smiled, nodding against me as she reached for the door knob.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… This is probably the worst cliffie, but trust me, it needed to break here. And it's probably the worst one in the whole story, so try to hang in there for me, okay?**

**Esme knows, not to mention Bella, which were big concerns for some of you. And Edward set everything in his dad's lap. Sometimes, it's the hardest step to take. Sometimes, you have to tend to your own life, your own sanity, your own needs. Sometimes, it works. Occasionally, it doesn't. **

**No real questions again, just concern for Carlisle…and Edward and Bella. We still haven't heard the details from that night, but they will come. Just be patient.**

**Okay…you know the routine. YouTube has the playlist, and FB, Twitter, and my blog have the pics. All links are on my profile. Next update will be Wednesday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	10. Nothing Else Matters

**A/N… It would be cruel to keep you up here. Go on…see me at the bottom. ;)**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 10 – Nothing Else Matters**

_Never opened myself this way  
Life is ours, we live it our way  
All these words I don't just say  
And nothing else matters_

_Trust I seek and I find in you_  
_Every day for us something new_  
_Open mind for a different view_  
_And nothing else matters_

_Never cared for what they do_  
_Never cared for what they know_  
_But I know_

"_Nothing Else Matters" – Metallica_

**EDWARD**

I didn't move from the welcome mat on Bella's threshold, but the sound of the door thumping softly open made me jump a bit and my heart beat heavy because things were about to get real. I was no stranger to sex, but suddenly, my palms and brow were sweaty, my heart was pounding, and my breathing was shallow.

When Bella wriggled a little to set her feet on the floor, I snapped out of the haze I'd been in. She reached for my guitar and then my hand, guiding me inside. She leaned the guitar against the wall of the kitchen, closing her front door. It was like I'd developed some sort of tunnel vision, because all I could see was her, and I realized that she was just as nervous as I was.

"We… We don't…" I started to say we didn't need to do anything, but I knew it would be a blatant and outright lie. I needed her. I needed her on a level I couldn't control, nor did I want to anymore.

She pulled my wool cap slowly from her head and set it down on the counter, gazing up at me with that warm smile that just fucking killed me. I took a step toward her and smirked when she backed up at the same time, only her path was impeded by the kitchen table.

"Nervous, angel?" I asked, not only because I needed to know I wasn't the only one, but if she was, then I wanted to know why so I could ease us both somehow.

"N-No..." she started but smiled, shaking her head. "Okay, yeah…a little."

"Why?" I stepped closer, pinning her between my body and the table. I pushed her hair from her face, slipping a hand deep into dark locks at her neck in order to tip her head up. I brushed kisses across her lips over and over, trying to slow myself down. Otherwise, I'd fuck this all up. "Why, Bella? Please tell me. I don't want you nervous. I'm kinda there enough for both of us."

Her laugh was short but sweet. "You… You'rewell, you're just you, Edward. I'm not…a model or…"

"I don't want you to be anything other than you, baby. Please trust me on that," I vowed, frowning down at her a little. I wouldn't have pegged Bella for being insecure about her looks, but I suppose in this moment it was understandable. "I think you're the most beautiful thing I've ever set eyes on, so…what else?"

Reaching up, she pushed my jacket off my shoulders, draping it over the back of a kitchen chair. She stayed quiet for a moment, but her brow wrinkled when she finally looked back into my eyes.

"I don't… I don't know what you expect from me," she said so softly.

I let out a light laugh, but it died quickly because it looked like it hurt her a little. "I don't expect anything. Honest. Nothing could happen tonight, and just being here makes me a fucking happy man. But the things I _want_ to do to you makes for a long list, and most of them end up with you calling my name. More than one time."

There it was, that sexy fucking smile that I lived to see. It made her eyes darken and her nose wrinkle, so I couldn't stop from leaning in and kissing her again. I was slowly bending her over the table, so I backed off a little.

"And after?" she asked tentatively, licking her lips.

Cupping both sides of her face in my hands, I made her look up at me. "I'm not here for a one-time thing, Bella. I'm…I've… I don't want just tonight. I want…all your nights…or mornings…or days. If you think I'm gonna—"

"No, Edward," she countered, shaking her head, which was still cradled in my hands. "I want that, too; I just—"

I cut her off with a kiss, silently thanking whatever deity I needed to thank that we were on the same page. My fingers sank back into her hair, tugging just enough to illicit a sexy moan from her. Cradling her head in my hand, I let my free arm wrap around her waist in order to lift her up onto the edge of the table. Fuck, I wanted her all over this damn apartment. Every surface had possibilities.

"Just what?" I panted, pressing my forehead to hers, but in her eyes, despite the dark wanting look gazing back at me, I saw a touch of fear.

"How do we…" she started, only to stop with a frown. "I'm so stupid. I should just… I said escape, and now I'm questioning…"

"I'm not going anywhere," I vowed but kissed her quickly to correct that. "I mean, I will be leaving on tour, but I meant…I want _you_, Bella. It won't be easy – it just won't be – but I want you to be the only one I come back to, maybe take with me occasionally. Nothing outside this matters as much as having you in my life… I want us to figure it out." My gaze raked all over her stunning face, and I simply shrugged. "I already belong to you, angel. I have since I stumbled into the bar that night. I just want you to belong to me."

"Edward," she whimpered, slipping her hands up my stomach and chest and around my neck as her brow wrinkled a little. "Too late. _Way_ too fucking late."

"Good," I growled, leaning in to kiss her again.

My tongue claimed her mouth as my body shifted to stand between her legs. Her hair was soft between my fingers, and I couldn't help but pull the locks a little when her legs wrapped around my waist and her hands slipped beneath my shirt. My free hand gripped and pulled at her shirt, cupping her breast over the soft fabric, and a long, hissing string of curses left my lips against her mouth.

"Holy fucking shit…you're pierced?" I whispered, my head falling to her shoulder, though I couldn't keep my mouth away from her skin if I'd tried. "What else are you hiding under there, angel?"

Her giggle was breathy, and it faltered when I dragged long, slow open-mouthed kisses up her neck to her ear at the same time my thumb circled what I could only imagine were hoops through her nipples.

"I told you, Edward… I'm no angel," she said, the last word breaking into a moan when I checked the other nipple and found that they were matching. "Sh-Shit…"

Grinning at her reaction, I pulled away from her neck and removed my hand from her hair. Staying between her legs, I cupped both breasts in my hands over that fuck-awesome Fender shirt, using my thumbs to toy with the piercings. Watching her eyes roll back and feeling her legs pull me closer to where I could feel the heat from her pussy, I bit down on my bottom lip, trying not to completely shred her clothes and take her right there.

Rolling a nipple at the same time my other hand slid between us, I leaned in to kiss her lips, whispering, "What else are you hiding from me?"

I cupped her pussy possessively over her pajama bottoms, feeling heat and guessing she was getting wetter by the second as she writhed over my hand.

"More?"

She nodded, groaning when I stopped everything to step back. Sliding my hands beneath her shirt, I gripped the waistband of her pants, and I locked eyes with her until she nodded and lifted up just a little so I could tug them down. Her legs were smooth, with pretty, creamy skin, and seemingly long for a girl that was just a few inches over five feet. Kneeling in front of her, I helped her kick out of them, and I caught a glimpse of black and lace and ink underneath her shirt.

My hands had a mind of their own, though. They reached out, gripping and skimming over smooth skin, disappearing under that long Fender T-shirt, and I grinned up at her.

"Whose shirt?" I asked, pulling a hand free and tracing the white screening on black cotton that was a phoenix blended into the Fender logo.

"Dad's," she answered with a smile, her eyes on me when I stood back up in front of her. "It's my favorite."

"I like it," I told her, "but you won't have it on much longer."

"You first," she stated, grasping the hem of my shirt, and I reached back to grab the fabric in order to yank it off over my head. Her eyes were dark and fiery as they drank in my chest, and even though I tried to stay in shape for the stage, something about the way she was looking at me made me feel insanely proud.

Smirking when those now bare legs wrapped around my thighs to pull me back in, I grabbed fistfuls of her shirt, twisting and yanking in order to reach skin and silky underwear, only to meet her mouth again. Fuck, taking her on that table was becoming more and more appealing the longer, the deeper we kissed. Fingers threaded into my hair and gripped my back, making me grind into her. The heat of her was intense between her legs; I could feel it through my jeans, aiming straight for my cock. And I wanted it.

Cupping her ass, I pressed her against me, grinding. "Lean back," I whispered against her lips, my hand flat on her stomach beneath her shirt, and I grinned at another discovery. "Uh-oh…another piercing. Sweet fuck, I can't wait to see all of you." I teased the piercing in her bellybutton lightly, continuing down to the lacy edge of her underwear.

She could barely laugh, but her smile was still there as her hands grappled for a hold on me somewhere, anywhere. My fingers slipped stealthily beneath the waistband, finding her bare skin and trimmed hair and wetness.

"What? No piercing here?"

"Fuck no. No needles anywhere near there," she huffed, looking up at me pleadingly. "Edward… Oh, shit…"

Grinning, I nodded. "Got it. No needles…but how about this?" I asked, my fingers teasing, slipping through folds, and rolling her clit just enough to cause her breathing to falter. "Is that a yes?"

I needed her to come. I needed it so badly that I was dropping to my knees in front of her, peeling those lacy things right off her and tossing them to the floor. I went back to touching her, skimming my nose up the inside of her thigh, just to inhale the scent of her.

"Tell me, angel…" I commanded, sliding two fingers deep inside her. "So wet, but I think we can do better. No needles, and you seem to like my fingers, baby, but…what about my mouth? My tongue?" I asked, sucking on the skin of the inside of her thigh, smiling in satisfaction when her whole body reacted. Her legs fell open, and she fell back a bit more on the table top. I pressed a teasing kiss to her clit, seeing if she would actually answer me.

"Please…Edward…_please_," she moaned, trying to find something to hold on to and settling for my hair and a fistful of her shirt, which was in the way, but I wasn't fucking stopping, especially when she said my name like that. I just had to hear that shit again.

No one had called my real name out like that. Ever. It was always Masen. I was always playing a part, but not this time. This time, everything about me was about making Bella feel good.

My cock strained against my jeans, and I tried to adjust it, but it didn't do any good. I could fucking wait, but my girl was losing her shit. My eyes locked on to Bella's face as I finally raked my tongue over her lips, through her folds, and around her clit.

Her heels found purchase on my shoulders, her fingers gripped my hair in a deliciously painful way, and her pussy started to clench down on my fingers as she practically rode my face. She was so close. Curling my fingers just right, I latched my mouth on to her clit and sucked hard as I rolled my tongue over and over. Her hips rose up, her toes curled, and finally, the sound I'd been aching to hear hit the air around us like a soft chanting prayer.

"Fuck…Edward!"

Something about hearing my name like that was so different, so meaningful, that I almost came with her right there in my jeans from hearing it.

I calmed her down by riding out the spasms, placing a sweet kiss to her mound before standing up. Smiling down at her, I placed her arms around my neck and cupped her ass to lift her up. I wanted her off the table, so I started for her bed. Her breathing was still heavy when her lips met mine, and she kissed me until I could barely walk. Somehow, I made it to her mattress without tripping or coming in my jeans, but we fell to the bed in a tangle of legs and lips and tongues, not to mention that godforsaken shirt and my pants.

I kicked my boots off, and they thumped off the end of the bed at the same time Bella reached for my jeans.

"We…can stop, angel," I warned her, grabbing her wrist gently to slow her down. "I…" My eyes rolled back as her hand rubbed the outside of my jeans over my aching cock.

"Doesn't feel like you wanna stop."

A harsh laugh left me, and I shook my head. "Fuck, no, but…" I stopped her hand again. "But if you keep doing that, we're gonna have problems."

She grinned, and she was beautiful and wild from coming, her eyes raking all over my face as she slowly popped the buttons of my jeans slowly. One by torturous one.

"Lie back," she said, nudging my shoulder until I complied, and then I lifted my hips for her to tug my jeans and underwear down. My cock sprang free, almost with a throb of relief after being trapped, and I hissed when her warm hand wrapped around me.

"Oh, shit…" I whispered through gritted teeth, my head pressing back into her pillow.

When I felt lips on my skin, I just about shot up out of the bed. They trailed over my thigh, up my shaft, and along the trail of hair on my stomach. Peeking down at her, I couldn't stop from rocking up a little. She was taking in the ink on my legs and stomach, but mostly, she was trailing those gorgeous lips across my leaking dick.

"Bella…" I moaned, pushing her hair from her face. "I want that, but…" Fuck, it had been a long damn time since I'd come by something other than my hand. I'd been on tour before the accident, and then rehab, which ended things with Heidi. Months, really. "I want…" I panted, forcing myself enough to concentrate on her. I sat up, smirking at her adorably disgruntled look. "Easy, angel… C'mere," I whispered, guiding her until she straddled me, her hot, wet pussy grinding down over me. "Oh, my sweet fuck…the heat." Slipping my hand into her hair, I kissed her hard and deep, swirling my tongue with hers, but finally pulled away. "Be still, be still…"

She grinned wickedly but stopped wriggling. Her fingers, however, were in my hair, across my face, and tugging at my shoulders.

"Wait, baby," I begged, finally reaching for the hem of her shirt. "Let me see you…" When she didn't move, I looked at her pensive face. "Angel?" I asked softly, and she finally nodded.

Gathering the fabric up, I tugged the shirt off her, and my mouth fell open at the beautiful creature sitting astride my lap. She started to cover herself, and I stopped her.

"No, baby…don't. You're…fucking perfect," I whispered in awe, swallowing thickly at the sight before me.

The breasts that had fit in my hand perfectly were perky, and the steel piercings through tightly peaked nipples were begging for my attention. Bending her back a little, I trailed fingers over ink – swirls of black, with flowers and dragonflies, and what I thought were music notes above her hipbone. Up her side was a splash of color where a dandelion was breaking apart into the wind. My thumb brushed over her sparkly bellybutton piercing, and I grinned when she squeaked lightly.

I touched her _everywhere_ I could get my hands on, bending her until her back met the bed between my legs. I cupped, kneaded, teased…just felt her all over.

"Fuck, angel…you're like a shiny new toy," I grunted, lifting her back up into a sitting position.

She grinned, a groaning laugh escaping her, but she grasped my face. "Edward, _please_…"

There it was again, the sweet sound of my name coming from her. My real name. My brow furrowed as I just gazed at her face.

"Bella, you…" I brushed kisses over her lips. "I love…the sound of my real name coming from you like this; no one's ever… And…"

Her gaze softened at my idiotic rambling, and her fingers swept through my hair.

"It sounds so fucking good…"

She started to move over me, and I stopped her. "My jeans, baby… we need…"

Shaking her head, she leaned over for her nightstand drawer, returning to hold up a condom, and I nodded. She slid back a bit on my legs, tearing open the wrapper and rolling the condom down over me. Once it was on, we locked gazes for a minute. The energy between us, the electric pulse coming from her touch…all of it was building.

There was no turning back, especially when my sweet girl lifted up and guided herself down over me slowly, taking me completely inside her.

"Damn," I whispered, my eyes never leaving hers.

"I know," she panted, wrapping her arms around my neck, my head, so there wasn't a space to be found between us. "Edward…"

She started to move, lifting slowly and grinding down. Our mouths barely separated, pushing heavy breaths out onto cheeks. My arms held her close, helping guide her rhythm, but our movements became jerky and frantic.

Rolling us over, I pressed her down into the bed, and everything became sharp and clear and felt so fucking good. Legs wrapped around my waist, but I lifted one higher, holding it there as I moved in and out of her with deep thrusts. Bella's dark locks were spread out around her, and I suddenly, desperately, wanted to see that shit on my own bed, my own table, maybe even up against my door. Bella grasped my back, slipping down to my ass to grip with every thrust.

"More, baby? Harder?"

"Yes…" she grunted, working with me.

I sat back on my heels, holding her hips as I pushed harder, using my thumb to tease her clit. She was gorgeous and sexy and so damn close. Hooking her leg in my arm, I braced my hand by her head. Bending down, I teased her nipples and their piercings with my tongue, nipping slightly with my teeth.

"Oh, come, Bella. Let me have it… I want it. Please…"

A few more thrusts, with a swivel of my hips, not to mention a hard suck to her nipples, had us both spiraling downward into the abyss. Her pussy clamped down on my cock in rapid flutters as everything about her pulled me close, and my thrusts faltered once, twice, three times until I buried myself as deeply as I could.

"Fuck…fuck…damn!" I groaned into the crook of her neck.

Her small frame gave a shudder, and she hugged me close, her fingers sinking into my hair.

"Fuck, angel… That was…"

"God, I know," she whispered, turning to kiss the spot where my neck met my shoulder. "Edward," she started but twisted my hair a little. When I pushed up a little to look at her, she kissed me. "Stay. I know…you've got…" Her eyes drifted to the ceiling.

Kissing her chin, her nose, and then her lips, I said, "I'm not leaving this spot. Tomorrow is another day, angel. Right now, I just want this. Okay?"

Her nod was fervent and adorable, and I smiled, but it turned into a wince when we separated. I removed the condom, and she pointed toward the bathroom, so I got up to dispose of it. Walking back into the room, I smiled at her holding up the covers of her bed. She was still gloriously naked, and I slipped in beside her, pulling her to me.

Something about every second spent inside her apartment felt perfect and right, and I pressed a kiss to her forehead as her body molded to my side. Sleep came easily, despite the night's earlier events, and I hummed happily as I drifted off when Bella's lips pressed to my chest.

**~oOo~**

The first thing I started to become aware of was the light filtering in through my eyelids. The second was the feel of warm, silky-smooth skin slipping along mine. The smell of Bella surrounded me, and slowly the memories of the night before started to come back to me. My dick hardened at remembering the sounds, the taste, the scent of sex; it seemed to still hang in the air of her apartment, and I wanted that smell with me always. But it hadn't been just sex – it had been so much more. It'd been electric and simply perfect…but deliciously imperfect.

I remembered walking back to the bed and falling asleep, only to be woken up some time later by warm, wet lips wrapped around my dick, and Bella didn't know she'd awakened a monster, because that started a completely new round, where I took her from behind. Hard.

Rolling to my side, I gazed over at Bella's back, at smooth, bare skin and the tattoo I'd seen in the darkest part of the night. Now in the light of day, I could see it for what it was: a swan in the shape of a treble clef. Brushing my lips across it, I sighed in sadness for her, because she didn't even need to tell me that it represented her dad.

I pulled her close, wrapping an arm around her waist and smiling when she snuggled that much closer.

"Edward," she whispered, twitching a little.

"Shh…sleep, angel," I told her, but deep-brown eyes cracked open just a little as I pushed hair away from her face. "Hey…"

"Hey," she rasped back.

I was just about to tell her again to get more sleep, but there were thumps overhead, and both of us glanced up toward her ceiling. I wasn't ready to face the reality of my dad, his probable hangover, and what we still needed to say to each other, so I focused on the sleepy-sweet thing in my arms as it sounded like Dad was getting up and dressed.

"Damn, do I walk that hard?"

Her giggle was soft, and she buried that shit in my neck. "Yes, though I kinda like it, especially when you're…"

My eyebrows shot up at that, my fingers digging into her sides in order to hear her squeak into laughter, to submit to the rest of the truth. "When I'm what?" I asked, rolling over on top of her to keep her from squirming away. Pinning her hands above her head, I leaned down to bite and nip at her neck, her earlobe, and finally those sexy-as-hell piercings through her nipples. "When I'm what, angel?"

"Running!" she answered in a loud laugh, wrapping her legs around me. We were quickly working ourselves up again. "On your treadmill, Edward…"

Grinning, I pressed my forehead to hers but kept her pinned beneath me, not that she was trying to get away anymore. "Now…I wonder… Why's that, Bella?"

Her giggle was a little embarrassed and her cheeks tinged pink, but she shrugged a shoulder. "I dunno. There's a rhythm to it that I like. It's comforting, and I just… I like it."

Narrowing my eyes at her, I snorted. "You're not telling me everything."

"Edward," she begged, starting to squirm again. "You _have_ to let me up! Please! If you don't…it'll be bad!"

With a chuckle, I rolled off her, and she scrambled out of bed and straight into the bathroom. As the door clicked closed behind her, my eyes drifted up to the ceiling again. I could hear my dad walking around my apartment, and I heard his voice, which meant he was on his phone. I hoped it was Mom, but I couldn't hear well enough. I sat up on the side of the bed, the sheets still wrapped around my middle. I gripped my hair with my elbows on my knees as I tried to think of what I needed to do for him.

"You can't fix him, Edward," Bella said softly, her sweet little bare feet appearing in my vision as I stared at the floor. I was highly disappointed when my gaze drifted up to see her wrapped in a robe. "He has to fix himself," she added, stepping between my legs when I reached out to pull her close.

Nodding, I let my face press to her stomach, relaxing a bit when her hands raked through my hair in slow sweeps of her fingers. "I know."

"I had an uncle," she started with a whisper in my ear. "Well, he wasn't really a blood relative, but I called him Uncle Sam." She huffed a soft laugh. "That was the joke between us. He was my own personal Uncle Sam."

Smiling, I pulled back to look up at her sweet face, only to see it filled with sadness. "Baby, what happened?"

"He…he was one of my dad's really good friends. He played piano for Dad for years. He um…he had a problem, Edward. My dad would bail him out of trouble all the time – both financially and legally."

Studying her face, I nodded. "Drugs?"

"Yeah, heroin."

Groaning, I cupped her face, kissing her chin. "I'm sorry."

"He was the sweetest, kindest, funniest grownup I knew, aside from my dad. He just…couldn't stop." She smiled sadly but placed her hands on either side of my face. "And he tried, but something always set him back – his marriage, his kids, or the music business. The last time…" She took a deep breath and let it out. "I was fourteen the last time I saw him, and he was high. He and my dad were working with a new singer at one of the studios downtown. Mike and I went along to watch. I'd been super-hyper about going, but Mike was seven and all over the place – touching stuff, asking a million questions, and he accidently knocked over a cup of water on Sam. He snapped at us, raising his hand to hit Mike, and my dad punched him square in the face before he could think. Told him to get clean or don't come back, but he wasn't to even look at us until he did.

"Sam was…devastated. He didn't realize what he'd done. It was the drugs, not the man, but still… He never came back, Edward. He overdosed soon after that."

Wrapping my arms around her small frame, I lifted her to my lap and hugged her with everything I had.

"I'm sorry. I get it. I've seen it in my work more times than I'd like to admit, Bella. The music business can be a stupid fucking cliché, you know?" I asked, and she nodded. "Jake had a weed problem, but he was lucky. He's just a little crispy around the edges." I tapped my temple as she cracked a smile. "Fucker's shot-out but harmless all the same. Our tour manager is pretty old-school hippy-like, so he's always on something. I'm lucky it isn't worse around me, but I've seen other performers, and it's…ugly." I grimaced but looked up at the ceiling again. "I never thought…"

"I know, baby," she whispered, kissing my forehead.

Dad's voice raised a little, and I caught snippets of his conversation. I heard him mention the wreck, Bree, police, and alcohol. I heard something about rehab and vacation time. Finally, I heard, "And I need to find Edward!"

Groaning, I sighed deeply. "Fuck, you really did hear everything. Huh?"

She smiled, and it was her usual warm, sweet smile, but I could tell she was hurting for me. "I did. I don't like that you took his place, but it was very brave for you to do it. I think you've done everything for him you can. And…" She kissed me softly, leaving her lips against mine. "And I _love_ that you only want me and music. I wish I could give that to you. I wish I could take all of this away."

"Me, too, angel." I felt my cheeks heat up at that, but I nodded. "I meant it, though. I… I want you in my life, Bella. In any capacity you'll give me, but I hope it's…like last night. I've never…" I shook my head slowly, adding, "I'll understand if you don't want any part of this…" I pointed to the ceiling, indicating my family problems. "Or anything to do with my…job, because it's about to get really testy. We'll be filming at the bar soon, the album's almost finished, and then…fuck, the touring, Bella. It's long and ugly and we'll be apart, and…"

Her hands met my face again, making me look at her. "Edward, I'm _still_ not running. I wish you'd stop assuming I was. After last night, I'd have thought—"

"Oh, God…" I grabbed her face and kissed her so fucking hard, my tongue claiming and tasting. "So much… Last night was just…_everything_. I'm ruined, Bella." I practically growled against her sweet mouth. "You're every song about every woman ever written."

She laughed, her head falling back, and I nipped at the exposed skin of her throat.

"You are…" I spun around, tossing her on the bed. "Want me to prove it?"

Her eyes narrowed playfully, and she jutted her chin out. "Sure!"

"Hmm," I hummed mockingly, eyeing her from head to toe, but I reached for the tie of her robe. "Let's start with…_legs_… ZZ Top said…"

Her laugh was happy and easy, but her legs kicked when I teased the back of her knees with my fingers. I was just about to run through every cheesy rock song lyric about the female anatomy just to hear that laugh, but there was a knock on her door, bringing me up short.

"Edward?" I heard my dad from the other side.

We froze, my eyes locking with hers. A part of me wanted to ignore him, but the other part knew I couldn't. Bella's hands cupped my face, kissing me softly.

"I'll let him in, Edward," Bella whispered, pulling her robe tighter and sitting up. "You get dressed. And I think we need coffee…"

Nodding, I stood up, pulling my jeans back on from the night before and walking to the bathroom for a moment. I took a piss and washed my face, stepping back into the room. From the other side of the room divider Bella had blocking her bed from the kitchen, I heard her greet my father and then his apology for interrupting.

He looked like utter hell when I stepped into the kitchen where Bella had sat him at the table. She stopped for a moment, a wicked smirk curling up the corners of her mouth as her gaze locked on to that table top.

Ignoring my father for a moment, I bent to kiss her cheek and whisper in her ear. "Best meal I've ever eaten, angel. Hands down."

She smacked at me, shaking her head, and then went to the sink to start the coffee.

I took a seat at the table across from my father, steeling my emotions and keeping my face stoic. He pushed my phone across the top toward me.

"It's been going off all damn morning."

Snorting humorlessly, I looked at the screen. Several texts, a few missed calls, and some voice mails – all from what looked to be Rose, Emmett, and my mother. I shut the screen off; I'd check it all in a moment.

"Edward," Dad said, and my gaze snapped up to see him watching Bella as she set the coffee to brew and walked to me.

"I'm gonna get dressed," she said, kissing my temple and then turning to my dad. "Coffee will be ready in a minute."

She walked away, and we both watched her for a moment as she gathered some things from her dresser before disappearing to the bathroom.

"She's, um…" he started but then smiled, huffing a light laugh as he shook his head.

"She's the best thing to ever happen to me," I finished for him, no matter what the fuck he was going to say. He needed to know to tread lightly where Bella was concerned.

"I see that," he replied firmly.

"But it's new, and I need to…" I sighed, rubbing my face as I wished the coffee would hurry the fuck up. "She's important, Dad, and I have—"

"Son, stop." His voice was pleading but firm, and he was sincere when he said, "I know. I see it. And…I'm sorry."

"You're always sorry, Dad. I'm just grateful you weren't like this when Em and I were kids."

"I was." That statement hung heavily in Bella's kitchen as I just blinked stupidly at him. He added, "I just hid it from all of you."

Frowning, I nodded, gazing down at the black screen of my phone instead of his face. I wasn't sure what to say to that, but I supposed it made sense.

"Edward…son," he started softly. "I'm um… I've got to go away for a while."

My heart clenched when I looked at him, and I opened my mouth to speak.

"I have to, champ," he said, using his old nickname for me. He'd called Emmett "bear" and me "champ" for as long as I could remember. "Your mother…she's going to leave me if I don't fix it, if I don't get my shit together. She's pissed that I allowed you to take my place, that I've let my drinking get out of hand. And I'm asking you not to blame her, son, because I got really damn good at hiding it from her. She had no idea."

Nodding, I waited for him to finish.

"I owe it to you, to her, to my patients, and to little Bree… I… You were right in saying that I could've killed her, or someone at the hospital, Edward. I can't…do this on my own. I've already taken a leave of absence from work, and I've told your mother. Emmett had Rosalie start the process to get me in the facility where you went. I'm going today."

My mouth opened, but I snapped it closed, only to blurt out, "I…I can take you."

"No. Absolutely not, son." He smiled sadly, and suddenly, he looked tired and weary and defeated. "You've done enough, and I've already got a car coming. Rose insisted that your driver take me. Umm…"

"Tony."

"Yeah," he sighed, nodding. "Anyway, I just wanted to apologize and thank you."

Bella stepped back into the kitchen fully dressed in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, reaching for the cups in the cabinet.

"None for me, Bella, but thank you," he told her, standing up. He inhaled deeply, smiling her way. "And thanks for putting up with me last night and for calling my son."

She nodded, wide-eyed, but she shot a glance my way.

He walked to her, offering her his hand. "I hope I get the chance to know you better, Bella."

"You, too, Dr. Cullen," she replied.

"Carlisle, please," he insisted, and she smiled a little. He turned to me, sadness all over his face. "You need to know… Your mother and I _never _considered you or Emmett to be…what'd you say? Fuck-ups?" He shook his head. "Never, son. You are our children, and we only wished you the best. And we want you happy. I'm sorry if we didn't tell you enough or tell you how damned proud of you we are. You should've never had to…" He shot a quick glance to Bella.

"She knows," I told him, smirking a little.

He nodded. "You should've never had to go to jail to prove anything, Edward…and that's all on me. A father should protect his children, not the other way around, and now you have a permanent record because of me."

He shifted a little just as Bella brought me a cup of coffee, and she stayed standing beside me, almost in a protective stance.

"I just…I wanted to see you before I left, son. I doubt I'll see you for a few weeks, if not more… I'll be away, and you'll be…"

"On tour," I said, and Bella linked my fingers with hers, squeezing before I stood up.

"Yeah," Dad sighed, walking to the door, and I held it open, seeing Tony downstairs in the alley waiting patiently. He started out the door but turned to tug me into a rough hug, only to pull back and pat the side of my face. "You… I love you, son."

"Love you, too," I replied back softly. "You got this, you know. It's not easy, but…I'm proud of you…"

He nodded nervously, but he squeezed my shoulder a little. "You take care of your mother and brother for me. And Rose…and that sweet girl behind you who looks like she wants to jump in front of a bullet for you."

Smirking, I nodded. "I will. I promise."

I watched him make his way down the stairs to the alley, where Tony opened the backseat door for him. When they backed out, I closed the door and leaned against it. I hoped it worked for my dad, and I hoped he was sincere this time, when he hadn't been before. And I wondered if his telling my mother the truth and her temper was the true catalyst for this sudden change.

"You okay, Edward?" Bella asked, coming to stand in front of me.

Pulling her into my arms and burying my face into her neck, I said, "I am now."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… We will catch back up with Carlisle and all his issues eventually, but not quite yet. And we'll pick back up with Bella in the next chapter.**

**FYI...Bella's Fender shirt actually exists. If you saw the pic teaser, you saw my own shirt. :) I love that stupid thing! **

**You guys didn't have many questions last time – except for a few I can't really answer – so the usual then… Pics are on my blog, Twitter, and FB. YouTube has the playlist. The next chapter goes up Sunday, so until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	11. Let There Be Rock

**A/N… You guys rock! Apparently, last chapter ruined some of you at work. Tsk…reading at work! ;) **

**Time moves a bit forward here, so I'll let you get on with it. **

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 11 – Let There Be Rock**

_And it came to pass  
That rock 'n' roll was born  
All across the land every rockin' band  
Was blowin' up a storm  
And the guitar man got famous  
The business man got rich  
And in every bar there was a superstar  
With a seven year itch  
There was fifteen million fingers  
Learnin' how to play  
And you could hear the fingers pickin'  
And this is what they had to say  
Let there be light  
Sound  
Drums  
Guitar  
Let there be rock_

"_Let There Be Rock" – AC/DC_

**BELLA**

"He won't be doing it!" Mom snapped, glaring my way. "I'm blaming you for this, Isabella!"

I grinned, shaking my head. "Fine, blame me, but you really can't stop him, Mom."

Mike looked like he was about to be split into two separate pieces. He wanted so badly to go back into the bar to be with Edward and the band, but he also looked like he was about to be sick because my mother was livid.

"He's eighteen, Mom. He's been a legal adult for a few weeks now. You could no more stop him from doing this than you could stop him from serving burgers through a drive-thru," I told her, shrugging a shoulder. "It's just a tryout. An audition. He may not even make it," I said, shooting a wink my brother's way. "Though, I doubt it. He's damn good."

Mike grinned, gazing to the floor. "Thanks, B," he whispered.

The sound of drills, saws, and hammers, along with random guitar notes and singing, met my ears from the other side of my office door at the bar. I rarely used it, opting to do most of my paperwork upstairs in my apartment, but occasionally I needed a place for privacy at work. However, the bar needed some changes for the video Radiant Eclipse was going to be filming, so some production people were already hard at work. Some things were simply visual and temporary, though some of the additions would be staying when they were done.

"Both are lowly jobs; they're beneath him!"

I laughed derisively. "Thanks. I'm sure bartender is in there, too, somewhere."

"He still has school."

"Yes, he does, so that means _if_ he gets the spot, he'll have to bust his ass," I argued with a glare Mike's way, finally sighing wearily. "Mother, I understand your…your _disdain_ for the music industry, but Mike is really good. The band needs a drummer, and they're good guys."

"What happened to James, B?" Mike asked curiously. "I only know what the press said."

I wrinkled my nose. "James broke his contract," I told him honestly, though I kept the nasty details to myself. "Something about violating a non-disclosure agreement."

Oh, and it had been ugly. The new album was finished, and Radiant Eclipse was about to film their concert video before leaving on tour. However, just as the band had celebrated the completion of their third album, word leaked that _Masen's_ father had checked himself into rehab.

The gossip mags and websites had worked the "like father, like son" angle on it, but there had been an "anonymous inside source" that had told them all about the possibility that _Masen_ may not have been driving his father's car the night of the accident, considering he'd been at a party that same night. Thankfully, no one important took that seriously, but Rose, Emmett, and Edward sure did, because the party mentioned had had a pretty suspicious guest list – specifically, two people who would've said something.

James and Heidi.

Apparently, as of several weeks back, the two of them were being watched by a private investigator hired by Radiant Eclipse's lawyer. The timing of it all allowed James to finish recording before he'd been released. The boys in the band didn't even say a word; it was the lawyers that took over. James was far from happy and was threatening to countersue, but he most likely had no leg to stand on.

"See, Michael?" my mother ranted, turning to my brother. "They'll screw you over."

"Actually, Mom, James screwed himself over." Shaking my head, I said, "They aren't the criminals or the deviants you're making them out to be! I understand your concern should Mike do this, but I promise you, they won't purposely put him in harm's way."

"You say that now, simply because you're…you're…sleeping with one of them."

I raised a deadly eyebrow at my mother. "So did you once, Mother. I'm proof of it. Unless you consider me a mistake," I challenged.

She sputtered, her mouth opening and then snapping shut. "No, dear…not at all. I just don't want you getting your heart broken like I did."

"Yeah, well…it's my heart to do with as I see fit. And Edward is not Daddy, not that you'd understand either one."

I was getting a little pissed off at how this conversation had turned to me instead of focusing on whether Mike was going to audition for Radiant Eclipse. My heart, which my mother was so worried for, was off the market; it was sold to the man currently singing a test song over the mic in my bar, and he sounded like heaven and hell mixed together. He was temptation and comfort all blended into the sexiest voice I'd ever heard, but that may have been because I knew him…_really_ knew him.

Sexy lead-singer, Masen, was on that stage out there, but it was the sweet Edward who would look at me from beneath long lashes as he practiced, with eyes that spoke silent yet endlessly naughty things, and with a smile just for me. In all reality, he was both men. He thought they were separate, but they weren't. Masen was technically an exaggerated and animated version of Edward, all hyped up and pumped up for the fans. Alone with me he was just as sexy, just as deadly, but he was soft and sweet and funny. And sweet God, was he ever loving! We'd been sleeping together for a few weeks now, and despite how busy we all were, the two of us tended to end up in either my apartment or his almost every night, which scared me with his coming tour because I was a spoiled, satisfied, and happy girl with Edward. Not to mention, I was completely in love with him, so his impending leave was making me anxious.

"Mom, the difference is… I _know_ who and what he is. I knew who my dad was. Music is something that flows through their veins, it makes their hearts beat, and it calls to them. Your son is the same way, which may end up a problem for you because you can't seem to accept people for who they are. I'm not here to fight with you. I'm here to cheer for my little brother because I know he's good enough to get the job, and I also know that those guys out there would watch over him…if only for me."

Mom flared her nostrils in anger, but she really couldn't stop Mike, just simply make him miserable. She turned to him, saying, "You'll ruin your life, Michael."

"So you keep saying," Mike countered softly, "but it's what I want."

"Unfortunately, Mike, if you get this, you'll be gone for the holidays. You'll be on Christmas break from school, but…" I started, but he stopped me.

"Yeah, I know." He nodded but shot a nervous glance to our mother. "I…I'm doing this, Mom. I'm sorry. It's a huge opportunity for me, and I may never get another chance like it again."

I fought my smirk but watched as Mom fought with herself not to say something derogatory, especially when she caught sight of my glare. I'd been witness to the discussion of the contract that Mike would have to sign should they like how the tryout went, and he would be set for life, even if he only toured with them for a year. However, that wasn't something I was going to tell our mother. If Mike wanted to, then he was free to do it, but I rarely discussed my personal business with her.

Before Mom could say anything, there was a light knock on the door.

"Come in," I stated, standing up from my desk and smiling at Rose when she poked her head in.

"They're just about ready for Mike, but they need to talk to him before he plays. You know, what songs, reading music…that sort of thing."

I held up a finger to Rose, and she grinned and nodded as I tugged my brother up out of his chair. Ignoring Mom for a second, I grabbed Mike's face and squished it until he laughed and groaned at the same time.

"Go. Go be awesome, Mikey. The worst they can say is no, but that isn't life-ending. It just means you try harder; you get better. Yeah?" I urged him, smiling when his answer came out all lispy and muffled since I still was squishing his baby face.

"Yeth, B-Beee."

I nodded once, and he turned to Mom. "Will you at least stay and watch?"

A small piece of her seemed to melt at that question, and internally, I sagged in relief because she would've hurt him had she denied him. But her answer was a quick, nervous nod.

"Cool," he said, looking to Rose. "I'm ready."

"Good, then head on up to the stage, kiddo. They're waiting for you."

My mom and Mike left my office, but Rose stopped me. "Wait, I need to talk to you for a second." She grinned when I shot a panicked look to the door. "No worries, Bella. It won't take long. I'll have you out there in time to see Mike play."

"Oh, okay, then… Shoot." I leaned against my desk as she set her briefcase down on a chair and opened it, pulling out a file folder.

"You've already signed the contract for the shoot and for the use of Chainsaw Charlie's song, Bella, but I need your permission to heighten security the night of the show."

"M'kay," I said, taking the stack of pages from her. "Is there a problem?"

She sighed, studying my face. "James is stirring up trouble, but not as much as Aro." My sneer couldn't be stopped at the sound of those two men's names, and she smirked my way with a nod. "I see Edward's told you about them."

"Yeah," I sighed, holding up the papers. "What do you need from me?"

"I need your signature on that, giving permission to the security team to come in and set up the night of the show. It essentially gives them the go-ahead to access every inch of this place just to make sure there are no fuckups."

Smiling, I turned to my desk and grabbed a pen in order to scrawl my signature on the bottom of the page. I liked Rose. I liked her simply because she was very real, very honest, but she was brutal at her job and in her protection of the boys. She looked at Emmett like he hung the moon, but she looked at Edward like he was her baby brother. There was something fierce about her that I found endearing.

She took the contract pages back, tucking them back into her case, and then looked back up at me like she was debating on saying something.

"What, Rose?" I asked, and she smiled.

"You… I promised Edward I would keep you posted on certain things, Bella. You know, certain events that are staged to look a specific way. However, I need to know if…"

I sat down next to her. "I'm not using Edward. I'm not that…" I sighed, shaking my head.

"No, no… I get that," she urged, placing her hand over mine. "He's… Edward is…" She huffed a light laugh. "Oh, Bella…you are _very important_ to him, and I just… I need to know if you're strong enough to handle the shit he's going to have to do for the next several months, the concert included." She grimaced a little. "I do my best to soften some of the shit, but sometimes, it's out of my control and the boys have to suffer through it. They're damned good at it, which is why I'm here."

Smiling a little, I said, "I'm well aware of the difference between real and an act. My father was similar, though _Masen_ is a little bit more…out there than he ever was. But I get it."

Rose grinned. "Yeah…"

"He's…very important to me, too," I hedged, not wanting to blurt out my feelings to Edward's sister-in-law before I told him. "I can handle a lot of things."

She smirked, narrowing her eyes at me. "I'm pretty sure you can, and I promised him I'd keep you as protected from most of it as I could." She took a deep breath, seemingly coming to some sort of decision. "You need to know that removing James from Radiant Eclipse pissed off Aro something fierce. You need to know that James and Edward's ex, Heidi, have been talking for quite some time…like before she and Edward broke up."

"I figured…on both of those things."

"Right, so…when I say that some things are out of my control, I really damn well mean it. Aro may have conceded to the band on how this video would work, but he has other ways of making the boys pay, and this time, it's specifically…Edward."

"What did he do?" I asked, my hands balling up into fists.

"He's bringing Heidi in as a spotlighted extra for the shoot," she stated, and her lip curled in anger. "As you know, Edward and Heidi met on the set of a video from their last album, and they got together. The problem is, Aro wouldn't get his hands dirty, but he would guide the director on which models to use. Bringing back Heidi for this shoot is retribution for denying Aro the idea that he wanted, not that it was a huge deal, but he doesn't like to be told no. Ever."

"That's so fucking wrong." I sneered, shaking my head again.

"It is. And I hate it, but I can't do much about it. The director liked this concert video idea the boys came up with, but he's sticking to his guns about the faces he wants to use. Though, I think that's Aro's doing. There's probably threats and deals under the table that I can't see or touch, so we've got to grin and bear it."

"Does Edward know?" I whispered, my chest constricting a little.

"No, not yet. I wanted to let them get through this drummer audition first, and then I'll tell them. I also wanted you to know, because…if Edward has to interact with Heidi, you need to know that it means nothing. I know him, Bella. He's gonna flip the fuck out, and then he'll worry about you because he'll have no choice but to act. Aro's got the boys by the balls. And believe me, I can't wait for this contract to be up, if only because I don't want to deal with that slimy asshole anymore."

I snorted, looking down at my hands. "You want me there when you tell him?"

"Please?" she asked, chuckling a little. "I know it's asking—"

"No, no, it's… I'd rather be there."

"Thank you." She stood up, picking up her case. "Last thing… James." She sighed, shaking her head. "The way he was let go was…ugly. He blew up and threw threats toward everyone in the band or anyone who works for them. He's possible trouble, Bella, so if he shows up here or whatever, just have him escorted out. And even though he's in deep shit with legal trouble, I don't trust him. None of us do. It's quite possible that he'll use Heidi, or they'll use each other, or whatever, to make things difficult. So if you hear something, come to me or Edward first to verify it, especially once we leave to start the tour."

"You mean…rumors?"

"Oh yeah," she replied, wrinkling her nose. "They're both mad at Edward, which is why they leaked out the info about his dad. If either Heidi or James…or both…figure out just how much you mean to Edward and the rest of the band, they'll target you, Bella. And I don't know if I can stop Edward or Emmett at that point."

"I think James knows, Rose…about Edward and me."

She chuckled. "Well, if the look on Edward's face didn't give it away, then Alec's big mouth did, but Emmett's threats sealed the deal. He just about broke James's neck telling him to stay away from his 'brother'sgirl.'"

"Ah," I said with a laugh.

"You've got my cell, Bella. So if you need me, call."

I nodded, but we both smiled at Emmett's heavy knock on the door. "Rosie, Bella… it's time."

We opened the door to see his tall form standing there with a grin.

"Edward wants you front and center," he said with a smile, taking my hand, "so come on. I'll get you up there. The construction crew is taking a break for this so the guys can really hear your brother." He bent to my ear when we stepped into the bar. "By the way, this shit is only a formality. They loved him the last time they were just fucking around. Mikey's so got this."

My eyes widened and I gasped, covering my mouth with my hand. "Seriously?"

"Oh, yeah," he answered, nodding and grinning. "Your mom isn't looking too cheerful, but…"

I sighed, rolling my eyes to where my mother was sitting off to the side. She looked rather out of place and uncomfortable, but at least she was staying.

"Mike's eighteen. She can't stop him, and I'm kinda glad about that," I whispered back to Emmett as he sat me down next to Alice, who was working on a laptop. On my other side was Tanya, who wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

"Good to see you again, Bella," she whispered in my ear, and Kate nodded from her other side. "If Edward isn't behaving, you let us know. He's right scared of us, really."

"Tanya!" I heard from the stage, and I laughed at Edward's deadly raised eyebrow to the scoffing girl at my side as he adjusted the strap of his guitar. "I don't care what you're saying. Stop it!"

"You think we know too much?" Kate asked innocently.

"You, too, Kate."

"We know every-fucking-thing," Tanya sang, completely ignoring Edward's glare, until she blew him a kiss, which made him roll his eyes.

"Relax, Edward," I told him.

He still looked a little grumpy, but he turned back around toward my brother, who was making some adjustments to his drum kit. Edward was dressed to absolute distraction up there. He looked like every bad boy who ever lived, with faded and ripped black jeans that were sitting low on his hips, a tight black T-shirt that showed off his ink and biceps, and his sexy Doc Martens that he wore all the damn time. His hair, though, was hidden away behind a black-and-white bandana and black baseball cap.

Turning to Tanya, I said, "He's behaving fine, by the way."

"That's what I like to hear," she huffed, nodding once, but smirked when Alice's giggle erupted out of her from behind her laptop screen. "Don't let him use the _Masen_ charm on you. Make Edward earn shit…you know?"

Alice snorted, nudging me with her elbow. "Don't listen to them. They love to ruffle his feathers, simply because he has them pose as tweaked-out groupies. Edward's a good guy. Always has been."

I caught sight of her screen, my eyes widening.

"For the tour," she answered with a smile. "Wanna help dress Edward? I was thinking a bit Goth for him, but…he'll probably freak out. Maybe something in leather…"

Laughing, I shook my head, trying not to think of Edward in leather as she continued to click away, but my attention shot to the stage as the guys got into place.

"Rose," Alec said over the mic, "we're gonna run through a few songs, just to test this kid out. Ours and a few covers."

"Whatever you need," she sang back, waving them on as she barely looked up from her phone.

Mike got himself ready, rolling his head a little, but his focus was on Jasper. Edward, however, walked to his mic stand and started a song from another band. It was heavy, fast, with time changes all over the place, but it put Mike to the test and gave him a chance to warm up.

They sounded amazing, and my brother was nervous as he finished the first song, but the second one was a Radiant Eclipse song, and it seemed to make everyone relax. The guys started to shoot grins to each other as they sang and walked around the stage.

As much as I wanted to keep an eye on my baby brother, my gaze kept drifting to Edward. It was the first time I'd seen him perform after getting to know him, aside from watching him play his guitar or piano alone or with his arms wrapped around me as he sang song after song into my skin. Despite the very small audience of friends and construction workers, there was a burning green fire in Edward's eyes as he commanded my dad's old stage. It was a fire that was always there, though, when he wasn't performing, it was a deeper, slower heat, simmering beneath the surface of his skin, which burned a little brighter when he was alone with me. On the stage, he was an inferno of talent, sex, and fierce lyrics. There were no issues with James, Heidi, or worries about his parents. There wasn't a concern about leaving on tour, the paparazzi, or whether I could deal with what he did for a living. Up on that stage…Edward was free.

He was also the leader. The rest of the band looked to him after they'd finished the third song, waiting for his response. They were all a little winded and sweaty but grinned and took silly dramatic bows when the construction guys whistled and cheered.

Edward, however, turned to my brother. "Take five, Mike. We're gonna talk for a moment."

"Guys, you can use my office," I said, walking up on the stage toward my brother.

"Thanks, Bella," they all chanted, and I chuckled at them as they walked through the bar toward the back.

I rushed to Mike, wrapping my arms around his middle. "You were awesome!"

He was practically vibrating with the adrenaline that was still coursing through him, but he laughed, kissing my cheek. "Thanks, B… And thanks for setting this up."

I pulled back and shook my head. "I didn't do anything. _They_ asked to see _you_."

His eyebrows shot up, but he didn't say anything to that. He glanced up behind me and then muttered, "She's gonna disown me or something if I get this."

Laughing, I shook my head. "No, she won't. She'll just complain…a lot." Snorting a little, I added, "Though if you get this job, you won't hear it; I will."

He laughed, but it turned into a groan. "Aw, B… I'm sorry."

I waved it away. "At least I don't live with her. You're her baby, so…some of it is a little justified. Okay?"

"Sure, B."

Turning to look off the stage and over the bar, I saw that our mother was still there, though she was talking softly into her phone, to whom I could only imagine was Phil. The construction guys got back to work on the façade they were adding to the edge of the stage and the details they were hanging on my walls. Rose, Alice, Tanya, and Kate were all talking softly as Emmett stood by the door. The latter shot me a wink and a jerk of his chin when the boys emerged from behind the bar.

I spun to my brother. "Make me some promises."

"As in more than one?"

"Yes." I laughed lightly, poking his stomach. "If they say no, then promise me that you'll keep playing, if only because you love it."

"Easy. Promise."

"Next… If you do get it, then promise me you'll finish school. I'll even pay for the private tutor. Promise me that you don't let it all go to your head, but you savor it."

He laughed. "Done."

Edward paused at the table next to Rose, and she smirked and nodded at whatever he was whispering in her ear. When he stepped away, she was immediately on her phone talking quietly.

The guys joined us on the stage. Alec gave Mike's shoulder a squeeze on the way to his keyboards. Jacob shot me a silly, flirty wink, offering my brother his fist to bump it. Jasper and Edward came to stand in front of us. The former looked relax and cool, but I got the impression not much rattled Jasper. He was the perfect partner to Edward's more intense personality.

Edward, however, looked worriedly my way and a glance over his shoulder to my mother as he shoved his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. He took a deep breath before saying, "You're good, Mike. You're really fucking good. The job is yours if you want it." Mike started to nod, but Edward held up a hand. "But… You'll be under contract, with us. Rose will go over it with you in a second. You'll also have to commit to some practice sessions over the next few days because we'll need you sharp as hell by the night of the show here. It's—"

"No, no… I get it," Mike answered him. "It's being filmed. I know."

Jasper smirked but spoke softly. "You'll also be committing to the tour, which will take you away from home." He shot a glance at my mother, who was closing in on the stage. "We are aware of your age, that you still have school. You will finish, kid. Not even an option. We busted our asses. You'll bust yours."

Mike grinned. "Yeah, B said the same thing."

Edward chuckled, shooting me a wink. "I have no doubt. Your sister may be your biggest fan." He stepped closer, his smile falling. "Look, Mike, this won't be easy. You'll be in the spotlight a bit, simply because you're taking James's place after a bit of a scandal. You'll catch a lot of heat from the press, and probably the fans. Your age and your talent may soften that shit a little, but you'll still have people looking to you. We'll all guide you through it. It won't last long, but it'll come on fast. Are you ready for that?"

"I… I…" Mike sputtered, looking to me and then back to Edward. "Yeah, man. I'll do my best."

Edward studied his face and shot a look to Jasper, who nodded once. "Okay… Welcome to Radiant Eclipse, Mike."

Rough, one-armed guy hugs were passed around, but my mother's scoff brought us up short, and I turned to face her, preparing to take the heat from Mike as best I could.

"So just like that? You're gonna take my son?!"

"Mom," I started, stepping forward and shaking my head. "He's been offered a _job_. Did you even see how good he is?"

"He's really good, but…" She paused, her chin quivering a little. "He's just a boy! You'll turn in him into…into…"

"Careful," I warned her, but a strong, warm hand landed on my shoulder.

"Into what, Mrs. Dwyer?" Edward asked slowly with an edge to his voice.

"I know this business!" she yelled.

The construction workers came to a standstill. The girls at the table stiffened but stayed quiet.

"It's sex and drugs and parties and drinking. Michael will end up in…rehab!"

I started forward, but Edward's grip on me tightened, pulling me back to his chest. "Easy, angel," he whispered in my ear. "She's your mom and only knows what she's supposed to see." He brushed a kiss across my cheek before addressing my mother. "I realize that your past experience with the music industry was not a good one, but I assure you the only person who took hardcore drugs is the person who Mike is replacing. As for drinking and parties…those things do happen, but Mike isn't of age. As for the sex… Is that something you really want to know? He's eighteen, with raging hormones and a girlfriend, so I'm fairly certain that happened under your watch."

I snorted at Mike's laugh and my mother's narrowed gaze, but he was right. I felt Edward's squeeze to my shoulder and another kiss to my head.

"To be honest, Mrs. Dwyer," Alec piped up, stepping forward, "it is a few parties and drinking, but usually it's for promotional events." He shrugged a shoulder. "Actually, it's long damn hours, hard work, a shit-ton of travel, sleepless nights on a bus occasionally, and annoying press and photographers. But he'll see the world, learn a whole lot, and the reward is the audience at every show we play. It's the _only_ thing that keeps us coming back. Honestly."

Rose put her phone away, coming to stand next to my mother, and a part of me wanted to stop her, but maybe this was the only way to get her attention…or approval, really.

"Mrs. Dwyer, you can feel free to have your lawyer look these over and get back to us," she said, handing over a stack of papers. "Radiant Eclipse is offering Mike a one-year contract, through the end of the tour, which will be renegotiated at that time should they want to continue. We added his requirement to complete his last year of school. There's also a non-disclosure agreement, which is fairly standard. It simply means Mike can't speak of the band's business dealings or personal affairs of the band members to anyone." Rose waited until my mother flipped through the contracts before adding, "As you can see, it's a rather…_lucrative_ offer."

I knew the numbers. I was well aware of what they were offering him. Her expression changed from anger to worry in the blink of an eye as she glanced at the papers and then to Mike.

"You want this, Michael? 'Cause once you sign this, you're committed." She held up the papers.

"Yeah, Mom, I do."

She shook her head slowly and sadly, her gaze landing on me but then moving to the person directly behind me with his arm wrapped around me. I have no idea what she was looking for or what she saw to cause her shoulders to sag a little.

"I guess I can't stop you…either of you," she stated, locking her gaze on me for a beat or two. "And if I tried, you'd hate me."

"No, Mom…" I shook my head. "We wouldn't hate you, but some things are out of your control."

She nodded. "I see that. Okay." She shrugged in a defeated manner. "Then let's go talk about it, Michael."

There was a collective sigh of relief around the room, even from the construction workers, which I found a little funny, but I sat down on the edge of the stage with my feet dangling off as Rose talked to my mother about the contract and the guys set up a practice schedule before the show before Mom and Mike left.

The thought of the show reminded me of my talk with Rose, which caused me to worry. Edward still didn't know what he was going to be dealing with,that he was going to have to face his ex-girlfriend, maybe even interact with her during the filming.

Ink, black fabric, and strong hands appeared in my sightless gaze to the floor as Edward stepped between my legs from the bar floor. We were eye to eye when he tilted my gaze up, and I couldn't help but reach up and touch his concerned face. The hat and bandana restricted my access to his hair, so I toyed with his T-shirt instead.

"You sounded amazing," I complimented him in order to put off the talk about Heidi. His smile was adorable, but the light tinge of pink to his cheeks made me want to do truly naughty things to him. "I might be biased, but I think you sound better with my brother," I teased him haughtily, and he laughed with such a sexy tenor, leaning in to kiss my cheek.

"I'm glad you liked it," he said softly, reaching up to trail his fingers along the spot where he'd just pressed his lips. "I _really_ liked having you in the front row. It made everyone else listening insignificant."

My brow wrinkled at how sweet that was, and I cupped his face. I wanted to scream to him how I felt, but I knew it wasn't the right time. I swallowed the words forcefully, opting to kiss his lips instead. Pulling back, I met green eyes, alight with everything he was feeling and innocent in what he'd have to endure, and I wanted to hide him away, protect him. My worry had to have been written all over my face, because Edward tilted his head at me.

"Angel?"

My eyes drifted to Rose, who looked nervous but determined, and she nodded my way.

Meeting his worry-filled face, I said, "Edward, we need to talk." My heart broke at the hurt, the fear, the flinch of his hands on my thighs. "No, no… It's…" I smiled at him. "Oh, baby…stop. Still here, remember?"

He nodded. "Yeah, okay, but…"

Rose's hand landed on his shoulder. "We need a band meeting…away from prying ears," she said, glancing to the construction workers. "Ladies, boys…let's take this upstairs to Edward's apartment."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… I do apologize for breaking it here, but the conversation coming up ran long, not to mention it's a very important one. All that…**_**and**_** I wanted it in Edward's POV. ;)**

**Some of you guessed that Mike would try out for the band. Nice job. James is gone, but not forgotten. **

**I need to thank Beffers87 for the **_**amazing**_** manip of Edward for this chapter. Once again, she used M. Shadows from Avenged Sevenfold, and he's beautiful…bandana, baseball cap, ink, and all. ;) It can be seen in the usual places. I also need to thank Smusic for the phenomenal teaser video she made for MBtM. I'll be adding that to the YouTube playlist, too. **

**Speaking of the playlist… I don't really have a list of songs that the guys did with Mike's audition, **_**but**_**… ;) The first song – if I had to pick one that fit – would be "Fuel" by Metallica. There's something about **_**this**_** Edward walking up to the mic with… "Gimme fuel, gimme fire, gimme that which I desire!" I'll add it to the playlist, if only for that, and the drumming fit. The timing is all over the place and kind of perfect.**

**The only questions this time around were aimed at Carlisle… Was he serious? Would he fail? That sort of thing… Only time will tell, but I'm glad you guys were happy he was at least trying.**

**Okay next update is Wednesday, so until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	12. The Show Must Go On

**A/N… The cheers for Mike were heard 'round the world. ;) That and… "Edward's gonna be **_**piiiiiiissed…**_**" LOL**

**I'll let you get to it…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 12 – The Show Must Go On**

_My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies  
Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die  
I can fly - my friends  
The show must go on  
The show must go on  
I'll face it with a grin  
I'm never giving in  
On - with the show -  
I'll top the bill, I'll overkill  
I have to find the will to carry on  
On with the -  
On with the show -  
The show must go on..._

"_The Show Must Go On" – Queen _

**EDWARD**

Rose's voice was all business, as was her firm grip on my shoulder. "We need a band meeting…away from prying ears," she said, glancing to the construction workers. "Ladies, boys…let's take this upstairs to Edward's apartment."

My eyes locked on to Bella's sweet face, and I panicked at the worry I saw all over it. Looking to Rose, I opened my mouth to speak, but she just shook her head. Everyone gathered up their things, and Bella slipped down from the stage, taking my hand in hers. She gave me a gentle tug to get me moving.

Emmett led the way up to my apartment, and once we were all inside, everyone found a place to sit. Something in me told me to keep Bella close, so I pulled her down with me onto the sofa. Rose, however, remained standing, and I didn't like the look on her face. An unnerved Rose could be a scary Rose.

"I need everyone to be quiet for a second," she started, frowning a little. "I got back the specs on this video from the director. The song list is fine, as is the scheduled small interviews he'll do with each of the guys, including Mike. I'll have to coach him on how that'll work. Anyway, he's charted out where all the extras, the servers, and the security will be throughout the filming. It all looks fine. I've upped the amount of security guards, simply to keep down the paps, the fans, and any other riffraff from getting in – and yes, I mean James."

There was a grumble of agreement that went around the room, but we didn't have a choice. James was absolutely raging pissed that he'd been busted on breaking his contract. Unfortunately, it wasn't even the band's decision, but the lawyer's. Jenks had been livid when his investigation team came back with proof that James had leaked information about me and the band, not to mention, they had proof that he'd been talking to Heidi. Whoever was watching her had turned them in.

Bella's hand slipped into mine, linking our fingers together. Her other hand reached over to trace the ink on the back of it. Along each line of the spider web etched into my skin, her finger trailed lightly. For a second I watched her, only to glance up to her face, which was dark and angry.

"Edward," Rose said, coming to stand in front of me. "I need you to stay calm with what I'm about to tell you. And believe me, I have busted my ass to change it but to no avail. Okay?"

Frowning up at her, I simply waited.

Rose took a deep breath, steeling herself, which was saying something, because she was pretty damn fierce all the fucking time. "They're…" She shot a glance to Bella, shaking her head before looking back to me. "They're bringing Heidi in for this shoot."

"You've _got_ to be fucking kidding me!" Emmett snapped, pushing off the wall. "I don't fucking think so!"

My mouth fell open, but the room exploded into expletives and gasps of shock. The most colorful came from Tanya, from whom I swore I heard names like "fuck bucket" and "cunt cake." I couldn't even laugh at the creativity.

My temper started to boil over. "Why?!" I asked, glaring up at Rose. "There are a million extras they could bring in! _Why_, Rose?"

"Because he can."

That statement fell heavily into the room, and everyone shut up.

"No, just…fucking no." I stated, and I looked down when Bella pulled at my hand, which was squeezing hers too hard. "Oh, fuck! Angel, I'm sorry!" I whispered, releasing my grip and kissing her fingers. "I'm…" My eyes narrowed. "You knew…"

"I did. Rose told me just before the audition." Her voice was tentative, but her eyes were warm yet worried.

I spun to Rose. "Aro!"

"Yup," she replied, shrugging a shoulder. "I've tried to change the lineup, but they won't have it, so I'm assuming there's some sort of blackmail going on. Edward, I'm so fucking sorry. I know you don't want her anywhere near you…"

I let go of Bella, standing up abruptly. I grabbed for my hair, only to rip my hat and bandana off and throw them across the room. "You're fucking right, I don't!"

"Well, that just sealed the deal for me," Alec stated calmly. "This will be the last of Volturi Records as far as we're concerned."

"Abso-fucking-lutely," Jasper agreed, but he looked up to me from his spot on the other sofa. "That's it, Edward. Let's finish this."

I closed my eyes in frustration, sinking my fingers into my sweaty hair. I shook my head slowly as Rose spoke softly.

"According to the specs, she'll be brought in as a highlighted extra. It'll be a bit like the video she was in…"

My eyes snapped open, and I gaped at her, because that video – while sexy and fit the song at the time – was not something I wanted to relive now. I spun to face the one person who hadn't said a damn word.

"Bella…it won't be…"

She grimaced a little but nodded. "I know, Edward."

Something about her calm tone unnerved me, but I faced Rose again. "Why would Heidi even agree to this?" I asked, holding out my arms. "I thought I was detrimental to her precious fucking career!" Laughter tittered out of Kate and Tanya, and I shook my head. "I'm serious! Why the fuck would she come anywhere near me after she…she…"

"Money," Jacob stated, shrugging and nodding at the same time. "Why do any of us do anything? I'm pretty fucking sure that Aro is footing her paycheck on this one."

"What if…" I started, but Rose shook her head.

"You can't back out now. All contracts are signed, all the dates and invites are set, and we've booked the film crew. It's a done deal. I just can't get them to relent on using Heidi, Edward. I wish I could, but I can't! I swear to God, I've tried."

"I'm not touching her, nor am I _acting_ with her." I folded my arms across my chest.

Rose sighed. "I know you'll do your best, brother-in-law, but don't breach this contract. You can't. We're so fucking close to being finished. Once _this part_ is over, you'll be on tour, away from Aro, and once it's done, _we're_ finished with him. He's pushing this because he can, because he liked the attention you and Heidi brought to the table, if only because it stemmed from the first video."

I glared at her and then at the ground, my head continuously shaking no. A small, warm hand slipped into mine, and I looked over to see Bella standing beside me, but her eyes were on Rose.

"I would like to speak to Edward…alone," she stated firmly.

Rose smirked, but she nodded, facing me again. "You just have to—"

"I know!" I snapped, frowning at the whole fucked-up situation.

Everyone stood up, Jake and Alec smacked my back, but Jasper stopped in front of me, saying, "Aro just ruined his chance, Edward. Keep that in mind. We'll handle whatever he throws at us and spit it back at him when the tour is over."

Nodding that I heard him, I sighed deeply.

Tanya and Kate stood up, talking to each other.

"She's such a fame-whore. She's doing this simply because she heard the rumors…"

My gaze snapped up. "What fucking rumors?"

"Bella." Kate's voice was tentative, but she pointed toward my girl. "You moved on, and she's jealous. I'm telling you, she liked the focus on her, Edward!"

"You know James spilled all that shit to her," Tanya added.

Bella snorted but shook her head and looked to Rose. "You were right."

"I didn't want to be…not this time," she said, waving everyone out. "Let's go. Oh, and Edward…you have to be—"

"Right…a fucking meeting tonight," I grumbled, shaking my head.

"You only have a few left."

I waved that away as they all left my apartment. I closed the door behind them, turning to lean back against it. My eyes found Bella still standing in my living room, but she seemed determined or unfazed by this shit as she pointed to the sofa.

"Edward, sit for me. Please?"

I fell down onto the sofa hard and suddenly exhausted, but Bella took a seat on the coffee table in front of me. My hands ached to pull her close, to reach out and touch, but I didn't. I wasn't quite sure where we stood about this situation.

She met my gaze, and we both spoke at the same time.

"Rose came to you…"

"I need to ask you…"

Smiling a little, I gestured for her to go first. "Angel, you can ask me anything."

Her smile was sweet and warm but a tiny bit nervous. "Okay… Do you still have feelings for Heidi?"

"No, Bella. I promise." I sat forward on the sofa, tugging her to the edge of the table. "No," I whispered, bringing her hands up to kiss her fingers. "How do I…" I sighed, feeling my face heat, but I looked Bella in the eyes. "Nothing…_no one_ has made me feel the way that you do, angel. That's the damn truth."

Her brow wrinkled as she captured my face in her hands, and she looked like she wanted to say something, only to open and close her mouth once or twice. Finally, she said, "Okay, so…if you _had_ to see her…"

"But I don't want to."

She laughed a little, probably at how childish that sounded. "I understand that, but… Listen, baby; Rose came to me because she knew you'd be upset. She wanted me to know that it would be an act you'd have to put on. So…" She smiled, her hands raking through my disheveled hair. "I know you can do this. I know it will be all for the fans and cameras, and I kinda…_love_ that I know the truth. That I know Edward…_and_ Masen. That puts me one up on… Damn, did Tanya really call her a _fuck bucket_?"

Snorting into a laugh I couldn't stop, I nodded. "Yeah, she did."

The humor in the room died quickly, leaving the two of us simply staring at each other.

"Bella, I…" I sighed, rubbing my hands along the outside of her thighs over her jeans. "I don't _want_ to see her. I don't think I can even _act_ around her. Not civilly. And it isn't anything do to with…with me or us breaking up. It's… She…" My gaze fell to where our knees were touching.

A warm hand slipped beneath my chin and tilted my gaze up to meet warm yet fiercely protective. "She betrayed you and your family, Edward. I understand that. Breakups are ugly, usually, but that was uncalled for. I get that." I nodded, but she cupped my face, studying it, finally bringing my lips in to meet hers way too briefly. "So…let me ask you something else."

I smiled against her mouth. "Okay."

"If she was…just another extra, another model… Would you be… Could you just do what you needed to do to get it done?"

I shrugged. "Probably. I wouldn't like it. I didn't even like the photo shoot in L.A. with all those models, so…"

"Why?" she asked with a smirk on her face. "Edward, you're…you. You're single and famous and handsome and… Any man would…"

"I'm not any man, and I haven't considered myself single since I knocked you over while running from the paps." Fuck, if that wasn't the honest truth.

Her giggle was silly and sweet. "Edward, stop…"

"What? I'm serious. Did you think I was kidding when I said all I wanted was you and music? Fuck, Bella…it's the most honest I've been with myself…and my damn family…since I became _Masen_." I was a split-second away from placing my heart in her hands, but I was terrified of what she'd say…or wouldn't say back. "All I know is that no matter what happens the day of the shoot, I want you there."

She smiled. "Of course. Every second."

"And you need to understand that it won't be me up there or with…" I groaned, gripping at my hair. "With Heidi. It'll be Masen, and I…"

"You are the same man, Edward," she stated so firmly and so fiercely that my gaze shot up from her lap to meet her eyes. "You are. You…think you're two different people, but you're not. Masen is simply an amplified version of you. _You_, baby. You've learned to use Masen as a way to shelter yourself from the freak-show side of the music business, but he's also the part of you that draws people in. He's your confidence and your bravado in front of cameras and on the stage and in interviews. He's the man who stood up to my mother for simply being stubborn and overprotective, and he's the guy tough enough to be arrested without batting an eye, but Edward comes out in your lyrics, in your charm, in the excitement over raising money for charity, or even inviting Bree to your shows just so you can make up for what someone else did, something for which you're being unjustly punished. That… Edward, all of that is _you_. Masen/Edward… It doesn't matter because you are both personas all blended up into one amazing person."

No one had ever said that to me, and I don't think anyone ever saw me that way. Hell, I was pretty sure my own brother never even saw it that way. I blinked stupidly at her.

"Masen may exude sexual prowess, but it's Edward who would never, ever use it to hurt someone. And of that…I'm absolutely sure," she whispered, trailing her fingers across my eyebrow, down my face, and along my jaw as I shook my head no. "I see them both in you," she said softly, shrugging one shoulder. "I've fallen for…" She gasped because my hands gripped her just a bit when I flinched.

She started to get up, but I pulled her as close as I could get her without actually setting her on my lap…or pinning her to the couch, which I was a fucking hair away from doing.

"Finish that sentence, angel. I'm fucking begging you," I pleaded, my hand slipping into her hair as I brushed kisses across her lips and chin.

She looked terrified, her voice barely a whisper. "I'm scared to say it, Edward."

"Why, baby?"

"Because it'll change everything…"

"How?"

"It'll make this so very real, and it'll make it so fucking hard to let you go in a couple of weeks."

I couldn't take it any longer, so I lifted her from the table and sank back into the sofa with her straddling my lap. Holding her face in my hands, I nodded that what she said was true.

"You think I want to leave…now that I've found you?" I asked her, gaping up at her. "This…_right here_…feels more like home to me than any-fucking-where I've ever been. You think I won't bust my ass to get back here? To bring you to wherever I am? You'd only have to say the word, and it's a done deal. I know you have a life here, a business, and I know you don't need me to do anything, but I would. I'd do anything you asked. So please, angel…finish that sentence. I really need to hear it."

Her hands were braced on my shoulders and her breathing was shallow, but her lips fell to mine before she said, "I've fallen for every side of you, Edward. I…I…I love you, and I honestly don't know what I'll do when you go on tour. My life was boring and dull before you fell into my bar, and it'll go right back to that while you're gone."

Grinning, I chuckled a little. "You'll just have to make do with woeful tales from strangers until I come back. And here I thought I was bringing all this chaos into your life, Bella."

"You did, and I love it." She smiled, nuzzling my nose with hers.

"And I love you." Something sort of glorious lit up her face when I said that, and I kissed her softly. "So…now what do we do about that, angel?"

She shook her head a little. "I don't know," she mumbled against my lips. "I want to be selfish with you, but I know I can't. I want to…punch Heidi for hurting you, but I can't. I want to keep you here, but I can't. That's what scares me, Edward. I'm not afraid of you, or what you do, but I'll miss you and worry about you and go crazy without you. I've gotten really spoiled to having you around, to hearing you stomp around up here, to your company while I close the bar. I'll be stuck watching useless TV."

Laughing, I nodded. "And I want to smuggle you in my luggage, but I can't. But I don't want to talk about the tour just yet, baby. I will promise that you can be as selfish as you want with whatever time I have."

"Can I come with you to your meeting?"

My brow wrinkled. "You'd do that?"

"You don't need to be there, Edward, so I could at least keep you company," she offered, shrugging a shoulder. "See? Selfish."

Grinning like a damn fool, I nodded. "You're not the only one. We could…go out. You know, make a date of it."

Another sweet giggle escaped her. "Okay."

I glanced over at the clock on my wall. "We'll need to leave soon, angel. You covered downstairs?" I asked, and she nodded. "Oh yeah, you're the boss."

"I am," she stated dramatically, "but Edward… We still have the Heidi problem."

Sighing deeply, I let my head fall to the back of the couch, but I couldn't tear my eyes away from Bella's beautiful face. She loved me. Knowing that made me ridiculously happy…and strangely relaxed, especially given I'd thought I was moving too fast. We weren't. We were once again on the same page.

Suddenly, Heidi coming to the video shoot didn't seem to matter so much. Bella's strong words rattled around in my head that I could do this, that it would merely be for the cameras and the fans. That's it.

A slow smile curled up my face, making Bella's brow furrow. "You look…evil."

I laughed lightly. "I was just thinking, angel. That's all."

Bella leaned closer, and I sank further down into the couch so that we were stomach to stomach, nose to nose. "And what made you smile like that?" she asked with a soft chuckle.

"You." I nodded, brushing my lips across hers. We were so close, I could feel every inch of her curves, her breasts pressed to my chest, and her light touch along my jaw. "You, Bella. You were right. I can do this. I don't like it, but…I abso-fucking-lutely refuse to give her power…not here. Not between us. Not a chance in hell. I won't allow anything to hurt you. No."

My girl scoffed. "She can't hurt me. She doesn't even know me."

"She doesn't have to know you, Bella," I told her. "Remember what I said… She's all about herself, which is why I'm wondering why she's stooping so low to do a music video. She moved beyond that after the first one. She's had TV spots and movies."

"Maybe Jake's right – for the money."

"Maybe," I mumbled, shrugging, but I reached up to tuck her hair behind her ears. "She always preferred Masen."

"So give her Masen." Her voice was soft, soothing, but her lips were fiery licks against my mouth. "Leave Edward…to me."

Grinning, I let my arms wind around her, my palms flat against her back, beneath her shirt, and finally cupping her ass as I gave it a good squeeze.

"See?" she asked with a sexy smirk on her face. "More of that selfish thing."

"I'm beginning to really like it."

"I can tell." She shifted over me, which only made me pull her closer, grind against her where we were pressed together, where I was growing hard for her the longer she stared at me like she was at that moment. "Give her the cold-hearted, just-out-of-rehab, conceited rock star, baby. Treat her like you would any other 'extra.'"

"You could handle that?"

"I can handle a lot of things, Edward, even snobby actresses with ulterior motives. What I can't handle is seeing you upset, is someone hurting you. Nope. Not happening. I love you too much."

"Fuck," I gasped when she shifted her hips just right. "Fuck, that sounds so damn good. Say it again."

"No…you."

I gripped her ass cheek over her jeans in one hand while the other slipped roughly into her hair in order to bring her lips to mine. I kissed the living shit out of her. I kissed her, claimed her with my tongue, and nipped her bottom lip with my teeth.

"I really fucking love you, and you'd better strip. Like now, angel. I want you before we have to leave."

She sat up with a laugh, reaching for the edge of her shirt. "Selfish feels pretty good, huh?"

"Shut up and get naked, Bella."

**~oOo~**

"Hey, Masen. The usual?"

"Molly," I greeted the girl at the coffee shop. "Yes, please."

"You got it. And for you?" Molly asked Bella.

"Coffee…cream and sugar, please."

"No prob. Be right back."

Bella smirked over at me. "Usual?"

"I come here after most meetings. Molly there is nice enough to keep me…anonymous. And I tip her really well for it."

Bella chuckled, nodding a little. "Gotcha."

"The first time I came in here was with Dad," I told her, toying with a sugar packet on the table. "And again…Molly." I pointed toward the barista bar. "She kept the people away from me when I was… Well, Dad and I weren't exactly having a pleasant conversation."

My girl smiled sadly. "Have you heard from him since he went to Serenity?"

"Umm…" I let out a deep breath. "Yeah, once. He let me know that he was in, that he was okay, and asked me to check on Mom every now and then."

"Have you?"

"No, but Emmett has."

"Don't you think you should?" she asked and tilted her head at me when my gaze snapped up from the table to meet hers. "She's your mom, baby. He kept her in the dark just as much as he did you and Emmett. And now she's alone."

Grimacing, I nodded. I didn't say anything, but Molly appeared with our coffees, setting them down. I thanked her before she walked away.

"Edward," Bella called. She said it so softly, something I noticed she did in public. My name – my _real_ name – was something she protected, something she kept solely for herself. It made me smile her way when she took a sip from her mug. "You really need to see her before you leave. You'll be leaving before Thanksgiving and won't be back until…"

"After the new year, angel. I know."

I gazed at the beautiful woman across from me. Memories of the things we'd done just before we left for the AA meeting flickered through my mind. I'd stripped her down, taking her on my sofa. It had been fast and fierce and fan-fucking-tastic. It had also been filled with whispers of love and want, and I was pretty sure Bella was sporting a love bite or two beneath the sweater she was wearing. I knew for a fucking fact there was one on the inside of her creamy thigh.

The girl owned me – heart, body, and soul – and I loved her for it. I loved that she wasn't afraid to chastise me or voice her opinion. So many women from my past – Heidi included – would say shit they thought I'd want to hear, if only because they thought they'd worm their way into my life. Not my Bella. My angel was real and honest and brave. It was refreshing.

The mere thought of leaving her for the first leg of the tour was maddening, and I could see it was the same for her. Radiant Eclipse would fly out to the East Coast, working our way from New York, down to Miami. We'd break after that, coming home for a few days, only to pick right back up in the Midwest.

A small foot kicked me softly. "Where'd you go?" Bella asked with a laugh.

"Miami," I answered, grinning at her laugh before sipping my coffee, but my smile fell quickly. "It all feels…wrong. Leaving, I mean. I just…and you…and my parents…"

Bella smiled, setting her mug down. "Nothing about your job…and it _is_ your job, Edward…is wrong. It's how you prioritize the important things." She nudged my leg again until I grabbed her foot and pulled it to my lap beneath the table. I rubbed her calf gently as she spoke, if only to keep some sort of physical contact with her. "Of course, you've got appointments and rehearsals. You've got your last… How many meetings?"

"Two."

"Okay, two more meetings until you're finished with the DUI stuff." Bella's eyes narrowed, simply because she wasn't happy about it. "And you're leaving in two and a half weeks. You'll be gone for over four months. You should fit in a visit to your mom and maybe one to your dad at Serenity. Baby, I know we were teasing – kind of, sort of – about being selfish, but you can't…"

"I know, angel," I sighed, squeezing her leg. "I know." I gazed pleadingly at her. "Can I at least… Can it be after the video shoot, Bella? I've got to get Mike ready, focus on the show, and then there's the whole Heidi thing."

Bella eyed me shrewdly. "You're stalling, baby."

"Yes. Yes, I am." I snorted humorlessly. "I'm still…pissed at her, Bella. She…blamed me so fucking fast! She…didn't even… She accepted my arrest and the wreck and then was pissed when she found out differently."

"Then sit down and explain it. In detail."

Grumbling under my breath, I sat back in the booth, folding my arms across my chest. "Okay, but after the video," I countered belligerently, because hell yes, I was still stalling.

"Fair enough."

My eyes locked with the calm, soothing brown I loved. "Come with me. Meet my mom."

Her chuckle was sweet, but she shook her head. "Does she know about me, Edward?"

"Yeah, Emmett and Rose have sung your praises already."

She laughed. "Okay, fine. I'll go. But you'll call to set it up for like the day after the show at the bar."

She pointed a finger my way, and I leaned in to wrap my hand around it. I wanted to kiss her, I wanted to do things to her I had no business wanting in public. Not that I gave two shits what people thought, but I wasn't blind to the cell phones inside that coffee shop. Molly did a fucking awesome job keeping people from approaching the table, but she couldn't stop them from snapping pictures. Again, I didn't give a damn what people said about me, but I didn't want Bella dragged all over the hell and back.

"Can we go now?" I asked her softly.

Bella smirked. "Yeah. Where to, Edward?"

I stood up, dropping my usual hefty tip onto the table for Molly, who I shot a quick wave to before offering Bella my hand to help her out of the booth.

I guided her out the door and into the chilly night air, but I leaned to her ear. "Anywhere I can kiss the living shit out of you without an audience."

Bella's giggle was adorable. "So…your car, then?"

Laughing, I nodded, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as we crossed back to the church parking lot where the meeting had been held.

"We'll start in the car, angel, and then we'll see where it goes from there."

I held the car door for her, shutting it once she was in. I gazed around before getting in the driver's side. I knew Bella was right. I _was_ stalling. I was stalling on a lot of shit, but fuck me, it had been a long damn time since I'd felt as good as my girl made me feel. We'd teased each other about the whole selfish thing, but I'd done what everyone else wanted for so fucking long, I was determined to take for myself as long as I could.

As soon as the door closed, Bella reached over, pulling me by the back of my neck to press her lips to mine. My whole being reacted to that kiss, and I hummed in approval as we lost ourselves for just a minute. There were gripping and groping hands, tongues and teeth, not to mention a little hair-pulling. I was about a split second from pulling her on top of me when she slowed us down a little.

"Something like that?" she whispered against my cheek, smiling against my scruffy face when I laughed and nodded. "Drive, Edward, before we end up doing unspeakable things in this church parking lot."

I groaned, straightening up in my seat, but my head fell back to the head rest. "You're killing me, Bella."

"You love it."

Grinning and still panting heavily, I rolled my head to the side to face her. Her haughty face was adorable and sexy. "I love _you_," I countered honestly and simply, smiling at her sweet grin. It was so easy to say to her.

Her brow furrowed, and she leaned over to kiss my lips briefly. "Love you, too. Let's finish this selfish date, Edward. You're gonna be really busy starting tomorrow."

Nodding, I started the car, the temptation to just run away with Bella so fucking strong that my hand shook as I shifted into gear. I somehow knew for a fact the next few weeks would fly by, and the guilt for leaving her practically swallowed me whole. I needed to talk to her about it, and I needed to talk to Rose, and then there were my parents, too. I was determined to figure out a way to survive the tour and leaving Bella and the last several months with Volturi Records, not to mention seeing Heidi again. When Bella's warm hand slipped into mine between the car seats, I calmed a bit, bringing her hand up to kiss the back of it. We'd figure it out. We _had_ to figure it out, or I'd go crazy.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Ah, those three little important words are out there. ;) There's something…**_**good**_** about having someone in your corner, even when you have to face tough shit. Edward was pissed, but…at the end of the day, he still has a job to do. **

**If you haven't guessed, the video shoot is next…and it'll be Bella that tells us about it. It was much more fun letting her observations out to play. LOL**

**Not really any questions this time around, just some love for Mikey, and even a little understanding of Renee's reactions. Oh yeah…and a whole lot of Aro, James, and Heidi hate. ;)**

**Okay, next update will be Sunday, as usual. You know where to find the playlist and pics, so I'll see you guys then. Until next time… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	13. The Pretender

**A/N… Happy Easter to those that celebrate it. Personally, I'm happy I'm off work, and I just want a chocolate/peanut butter egg out of the whole day. Anything else is superfluous. ;)**

**So this chapter ran particularly long…but it's the video/concert shoot. It's all yours…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 13 – The Pretender**

_What if I say I'm not like the others?  
What if I say I'm not just another one of your plays?  
You're the pretender  
What if I say I will never surrender?_

_In time or so I'm told_  
_I'm just another soul for sale... oh, well_  
_The page is out of print_  
_We are not permanent_  
_We're temporary, temporary_  
_Same old story_

_I'm the voice inside your head_  
_You refuse to hear_  
_I'm the face that you have to face_  
_Mirrored in your stare_  
_I'm what's left, I'm what's right_  
_I'm the enemy_  
_I'm the hand that will take you down_  
_Bring you to your knees_

"_The Pretender" – Foo Fighters_

**BELLA**

"It's too damned early for this shit," Tori complained, sipping the cup of coffee I'd just handed her. "Don't they know bartenders are night people?" Her scowl was more funny than grumpy.

Smirking, I took a stool next to hers at the bar. We'd just arrived inside Charlie's, but Edward, my brother, the rest of the band, and all the film crew had started way before the sun had even come up.

I hid my smile behind my mug at the memories of Edward's very talented yet fumbling hands just before he'd left me alone in his bed. He'd promised me more touches, more kisses, and more whatever I damn well asked for after the show was over. He also apologized – with whispered words and kisses between my legs that had left me sweaty and shaky – for what the day was about to bring. He'd pried himself out of bed to meet everyone for one more practice, leaving me a boneless pile of goo. He'd even reset his alarm to let me get a few hours of sleep before I needed to come downstairs to the bar.

As a crew set up tables and chairs in front of the stage, adjusted lighting, set up cameras, and added the final touches to the stage, walls, and floors, the boys were suffering through makeup and wardrobe. Alice was a force with her choices for them, and most of the boys just nodded and took what she handed them with resigned looks on their faces. Once they were dressed, a tall, thin man named Ivan started on makeup and hair. Again, the boys didn't seem to bat an eye at it.

The director, Mr. Milton, wanted to interview the band first, get that on film before the show, and then everything would be edited together later. The "audience" – which was made up of a few fans who had won tickets from radio stations, some local members of media, and a few record label people – wasn't due to arrive for another few hours, not to mention the extras and the additional servers. Security had been in place since the night before, keeping the paparazzi and fans at bay outside. Tori, Garrett, and I would merely run the bar in the background; our faces wouldn't even be seen on camera.

An older man with longer hair worked on the stage, making sure the boys' instruments were all in the right places. Marcus, Radiant Eclipse's tour manager, moved with a strange grace for a man who had to be pushing sixty. My father's old, bare stage was no longer recognizable. Where my brother's drum kit used to sit alone now looked like something out of…well, a rock video. Stacks of amps framed either side of the small stage. Guitars sat gleaming and beautiful on their stands, while wires and chords snaked along the sides and the front like vines that were taking over a jungle. An electrician tested different colored lights and smoke effects. Mike's drum kit had grown bigger – impressively so, actually; I'd been shocked that my mother and Phil had offered that to my brother – and the set had been shifted just off to the left to make room for a beautiful, black baby grand piano and Alec's keyboards.

The production crew had enhanced the atmosphere of my father's place, giving it a feel of an old jazz/blues club. They'd added bigger pictures of Chainsaw Charlie and some of the famous people he'd worked with over the years. I'd brought my father's gold and platinum albums out of my apartment to allow them to be displayed for the shoot, but I was going to let them stay once it was all over. They'd also moved Dad's Fender from behind the bar to a much more prominent spot just off stage.

Ivan tsked grumpily at Edward, saying, "I don't know why I try with this hair! What the hell did you do to it this morning?!"

Snorting softly to myself, I took another sip of coffee, but Edward heard me and grinned my way.

"He's ridiculously in love with you, Bella," Tori whispered with a soft laugh.

Sighing deeply, I shrugged a shoulder, but the truth came out anyway. "I know."

She laid her head on my shoulder. "Good. You deserve it. He's good for you. I like that he makes you swoony."

I smiled at that, but she'd said it before. Tori, despite her exuberant attitude and wild personality, was a true romantic deep down. Of course, she also thought Edward sent dirty texts to me all damn day…which he did occasionally, but my employee didn't need to know that.

I wanted to savor the silly-sweet, teasing grin on Edward's face as Ivan tried his best to tame the hair that I personally had wrecked that morning. I wanted to kiss the wrinkle that scrunched up his nose, and even more… The blush that bloomed across his cheeks made me absolutely ravenous for him. I wanted to tuck all that away into my heart for the rest of the day, because I knew what he was about to face, what would happen to that adorable side of him. In just a few hours, the filming of the show, the side story line, and the interaction with the fans and extras would begin, and my sweet, silly Edward would fade into the background to allow Masen to command the stage, the cameras, and the women who loved him.

He'd also come face to face with Heidi. And he'd do it with a cold, calculated attitude. I knew it was coming; we'd discussed it at length, but I was still bracing for it.

In fact, a part of it had already started with the director. Mr. Milton stepped off the stage, coming to stand in front of the guys, explaining how he wanted the interviews to go – a few questions for the entire band and a handful for each member. Edward's face was serious and stoic, almost conceited as he answered his questions. As they got to work, Rose took Mike off to the side to coach him, and my baby brother looked so nervous and young at what he was about to do.

There was a knock at the door, and Emmett shifted enough to open it. In stepped Tanya and Kate, the former carrying a grocery bag.

They assessed the bar with their usual looks of humor and judgment as they walked to me.

"Bella," Tanya greeted with a wry smile, holding up the bag. "I brought you something. C'mere, I'll show you. You'll need it for later. I guarantee it."

"'Kay," I said, getting up to follow her behind my bar.

She set the bag down on the bar top, gazing around the room again. "Listen, I realize that part of that director's script calls for a few shots of the guys drinking and partying it up. Edward won't drink and work. He just won't. He'll have a few beers after it's all over, but he likes to keep his voice in good condition and his head straight. The other guys may have a shot or two, but not our boy, okay?"

"Okay," I said, nodding her way. I smiled at the two bottles of Jack Daniels she pulled out of the bag. "Tea?" I asked, unscrewing the cap and taking a sniff. The scent of honey was delicious and thick.

"Edward told you?"

"Yeah." I nodded, smiling up at her.

She shot me a wink. "Good. You'll be in charge of Edward's drinks, then. Hell, you could simply hand him this bottle, and he'll chug it like a college kid on spring break."

Chuckling, I nodded, stashing the bottles where I could grab them later. When I glanced back at her face, I saw her worried expression.

"How's he…" she started, but stopped. "Damn, Bella… Is he okay?"

I sighed, my eyes darting around the room to find Edward. He was sitting on the edge of the stage next to Jasper as Alec did his private interview. They had acoustic guitars in their hands, playing softly together. Alice had dressed them both in black jeans and their usual Docs, but Jasper was wearing a hooded long-sleeved shirt, and Edward had on a black T-shirt and a leather vest. It wasn't obvious that they had makeup on, but I was pretty sure it was to keep down the shine from all the lights.

"He's umm…" I met her gaze. "He'll be okay, but don't expect him to be pleasant to Heidi."

"Yeah, well…I wasn't exactly gonna bow down to that bitch when she gets here, either," she muttered, rolling her eyes.

"No, I don't think you understand. He's instructed Emmett and the rest of security to keep her away from him until absolutely necessary. She's not allowed to talk to him, approach him, or touch him unless it's called for during a shot. And even that's iffy with the director," I explained. "Though, that goes for all the participants in the audience." I shrugged a shoulder.

Kate's giggle was infectious, especially when she said, "Oh, this is gonna _rock_!"

Tanya smiled at that and then turned to me. "And you? You okay with it?"

"He has a job to do, not that Aro makes it easy," I told her, frowning a little. "I know how Edward feels about Heidi. I know anything he does today will be for the Radiant Eclipse fans, simply because they're very important to him."

"They are," Tanya said, dragging it out a little. "But Bella, you are, too. You know that, right? Tell me he's told you…"

Grinning, I nodded. "He has. Repeatedly."

"That's my boy," Kate praised, nodding once and grinning Edward's way when he shot a raised eyebrow our way.

Tanya and Kate joined Tori and me at the bar with our coffee. We chatted about different things as the guys would trade out for their small interviews. The last questions asked were to the whole band as they sat on the stage in a semi-circle, using stools from the bar. They all looked relaxed and handsome, teasing and laughing as they discussed the new album, the upcoming concert, their influences concerning certain songs, and the addition of a new drummer.

It was stop-and-start and completely boring. The guys barely got a break when the interviews were done, because they were needed for photographs, both individual and group shots, not to mention a few members of the media were let in.

Slowly, all the necessary people started to show – the extra servers who would be taking the drinks to the tables, the extra members of security, and some of the extras for the audience. The sound of a crowd building outside also told me that the fans were ready and lined up to get in.

Garrett, Tori, and I were getting last-minute instructions from the director's assistant, Gerry, when Emmett opened the doors to chaos and screaming.

"Ah, fuck…" Tori sighed deeply. "She's here."

I leaned against the bar, taking in Edward's ex. She was stunning, with light-brown hair, sunglasses, and a fluffy white fur coat. All eyes were on her, which was understandable, considering she walked into the room like she owned it. Her glasses came off, and her bright-blue eyes assessed her surroundings with barely a glimmer of emotion over her face. One of her assistants took her coat, draping it over the back of a stool.

"Oh, damn…what died to keep her warm?" Kate asked, wearing a grimace on her face.

"A yeti?" Tanya guessed sarcastically, shrugging her shoulder when even Gerry laughed softly. "What? She'd probably only settle for something that rare. Or a shit-ton of baby bunnies, just because she's evil…"

"All extras need to stay along the side over there," Emmett instructed, pointing to a row of chairs.

"Emmett…" Heidi started.

"You, too," he stated so firmly that she laughed at him.

"I just wanted to see Masen…"

"You'll see him when it's called for, Heidi, and no sooner. There is a list of instructions on your seats. But we'll go over them anyway. There will be no talking to the members of the band, nor will you touch them. Do not hand them anything, and there will be no cell phones or any other devices allowed on your person while shooting. You'll stay in your designated places at all times, and if you are required to interact with the band, you will do exactly as you're told."

"These don't apply to me, Emmett!" Heidi argued.

"Yes, in fact, they do," he stated, stepping closer to her. "If you'd taken the time to read the contract you signed, you'd understand that. If you can't abide by these rules, then security will escort you out. Before the director starts, are there any questions?"

My eyebrows shot up at that, because that was news to me, but Rose sidled up next to me. "I may have altered the extras' contract just a bit," she murmured in my ear. She smirked, shooting me a wink. "Aro may have control over the director, but he doesn't have control over anything seen as a security threat. That's actually Emmett's call, and even Aro knows that. Wonderful thing, loopholes."

Tanya's laugh was loud, and she covered it up with her hand. "Oh, my dear cousin… You weren't kidding when you said you'd figure something out. You know…she's gonna blow when she finally sees him and can't talk to him."

"Mmhm," Rose hummed, nodding as she worked on her phone for a moment. "I'm counting on it. No one fucks with my family. I don't care what movie they're in. And I sure as _fuck_ don't care what Aro says… Those boys are my priority."

Mr. Milton stepped to the center of the room. "Okay, everyone listen up! We're going to shoot the story line shots in just a few minutes. I suggest if you need a drink or the bathroom, you get it done now. That includes the band, as well," he called toward the stage.

The guys stepped around the instruments on the stage, hopping down to the floor. All the actresses had removed their coats, leaving them like fans at a concert – short skirts or skin-tight jeans, sexy shirts, and high heels. When Heidi started toward Edward, three security men stepped into her path, pointing for her to take a seat.

My gaze shot to Edward, and I took a deep breath and let it out.

Masen had officially stepped into the room.

He was pissed and cold, his jaw rolling as he gritted his teeth, but he was no less beautiful. He walked – or rather _stalked_ – into the main floor of the bar. He ignored the whispers coming from the extras, even more the scowl Heidi was shooting his way as he stepped up to Mr. Milton. His strong, colorful arms were crossed over his chest as he glared down at the man who was at least five inches shorter than Edward was. The conversation was quiet but intense as they both shot looks to Heidi, who was fighting to see him around the large frame of a security guard.

"No!" Edward suddenly snapped, staring down Milton, but his finger pointed toward the extras who were still star-struck over the band, though Heidi had come to a standstill. "You'll get the shots you need now at the bar. I don't wanna still be fuckin' around with this bullshit five minutes before we're supposed to be on the damn stage. You want a party, then we'll shoot it now. Get it done. This part is not my priority, Milton; the show is."

Milton cowered from Edward, nodding a bit, and he turned toward the bar, where Gerry was waiting for the next instruction. "Get the cameras behind the bar. I want the shots over the bartenders, facing the boys. I want one camera focused from the side, wandering through the crowd." He turned to the extras, telling them that they were going to push toward the guys and the bar while music played in the background.

Emmett and his team formed a line, making sure no cell phones or cameras made it by them on the extras. What had been a stop-and-start all morning instantly became hustle and bustle. Makeup was touched up, music was turned on, and Garrett, Tori, and I got into place while Milton put the boys where he wanted them, not that Edward listened, because he walked straight to the bar.

What made me smirk his way was that he took his usual barstool – the one he'd been using since the first night he stumbled into my bar – but his eyes weren't on me; they were on Gerry. "Hey, dude?" he called, pointing from Garrett, to Tori, and then me. "Their faces don't go on film. Am I clear? This is their real jobs, their real lives, and I won't have their faces plastered all over hell and back."

I suppressed a groan at how sexy that was, that sudden fierce protection that Edward let loose occasionally. Something akin to respect finally graced Garrett's face as he gazed from Edward to Gerry.

The latter finally nodded, saying, "Yeah, Masen, we'd already—"

Edward held up his hand. "Yeah, well…just fucking making sure."

He still hadn't looked at me, but I understood it. My Edward – not Masen – wore his emotions, his heart, and his desire on his sleeve. One look and he'd have melted a little, but I wanted his attention quickly, simply because Heidi was walking his way.

Reaching beneath the bar, I grabbed one of the bottles of Jack Daniels Tanya had given me and set it down in front of him with a heavy thump.

"It's all just bullshit, Edward," I muttered for only him to hear me, reminding him of our very first conversation inside this bar, and his head spun from watching everyone getting into place to face me.

There he was, and I smiled a little his way when the green in his eyes warmed to the loving gaze I knew so well. The chatter was loud around us, but they all seemed to fade away when he set his elbows on the bar top when I did the same.

Tilting my head at him, I smirked with a shake to my head. "You know that whole _selfish_ thing we talked about?"

His grin was a quick yet beautiful flash, and it stayed halfway up his face in a deviant and deadly way. "Yes, angel," he whispered back.

"Well," I huffed dramatically, licking my lips, and I chuckled when his eyes followed the movement. "Well, if you…Mr. Cullen…can get through this next…oh, ten minutes of pure, unadulterated hell…I promise you can be as _selfish_ as you want after the show." I raised an eyebrow at him when I pushed his bottle of tea his way. "Deal?"

His long fingers wrapped slowly, sexily around the bottle, but they purposefully brushed over mine, tracing with a light touch, but I felt them _everywhere_.

"I love you," he said back with a slight wrinkle to his brow. "And that's a deal, beautiful." He shot me a wink, reaching up to tap under my chin with his fingers. "But I'm not sure you know what you're getting yourself into, Bella." He grinned briefly at my soft laugh and shoulder shrug.

"Love you, too. And…I'm _well aware_ of what you're capable of, Edward."

The heat that bloomed across his cheeks as he grinned down at the bar, despite the makeup that dusted over his pretty skin, was so fucking sexy, I almost leaned in to kiss him when he met my eyes again. However, Jasper, Jake, and Mike stepped up on either side of Edward, breaking our trance as they were put into specific places.

I glanced behind him where Heidi was walking to him. "Watch your back…" I pushed off the bar, pointing to the bottle. "And you're to see me for your drinks, okay?"

"Okay," he sighed, and he shot a gaze to Jasper before turning around to face Heidi. She was reaching up to tap his shoulder, and he caught her by the wrist before she could. "Don't touch me."

I flinched at the cold, harsh tone, but she merely smiled up at him. Emmett started for her, but Edward shook his head. He let Heidi's wrist go, leaning back against the bar.

"Heidi," he greeted. "Don't know why you'd slum it, coming to this shoot, but how's Peter?" He gasped dramatically and added, "Or better yet… How's _James_?"

Jasper and Jacob chuckled, which seemed to piss her off. "Masen, can we talk after the show?"

"No," he told her, shaking his head. "There's nothing to talk about, but I'm sure you remember how to get messages to me through Rose." Edward jerked his chin toward a stone-faced Rosalie, who was standing out of the way alongside Alice, Tanya, and Kate – all of whom were wearing scowls on their faces. "I'll be busy after the show, and I have nothing to say to you, Heidi. Trust me, you did me a favor."

That last sentence hit home with her, but instead of looking contrite, she jutted her chin out in childlike stubbornness. Where someone would usually apologize, try to explain, Heidi didn't. From what I could see, apologies were _beneath_ her. However, she wanted him…again. It was all over her very pretty, very perfect face as she deliberately eyed him from head to toe. Her expression seemed calculating, like she was running through a list of shit to say to get his attention, to melt his fierce gaze. She murmured a few things I couldn't quite catch, but he merely waved her away and shook his head, and from behind him, I could see his tension in his strong, broad shoulders.

A sharp clap of hands caught everyone's attention, and we all looked to Milton. He pointed to individual extras, allotting them to a member of the band. "You, you, and you…you'll be dancing around Jacob. You three…Alec and Jasper. You and you…you'll be with Masen. Heidi, you'll be with Mike, along with the girl over there."

Heidi scoffed. "No, I was brought in—"

"You were brought in as a favor to Aro. He did not say to which capacity I could use you, so get your spoiled ass in gear, or I'll use you as a background dancer. Am I clear?" Milton snapped back. "Go…other side." He pointed around Edward to my brother, who looked nervous. Milton turned to face Edward, speaking softly. "Aro's an asshole for bringing her here, but I was bound by contract. My apologies, son." He reached into his pocket, pulling out a coin and holding it up. "Over a year sober," he stated proudly, nodding once. "Heard what the girl did to you when you went into Serenity – good place, by the way. I can't imagine…"

We were all sort of in shock for a second, but Edward's eyes glanced from the coin to Milton's face.

"Actually, man…it was truly for the best." Edward patted the Milton's shoulder, but he shot a glance and a wink to me. "The fucking _best_ thing."

Milton smirked but then nodded. "Good for you, kid." He spun on his heel. "Okay…_action_!"

Something about Milton taking over, about him knowing exactly what was going on, made for a much more relaxed environment, despite Heidi's pouting. When the camera landed on her, she did her job by dancing around my brother, but she was not happy.

The guys put on an act of drinking, dancing, and allowing the women to touch them, and it was actually pretty damn funny. Edward made a show of tilting back the whiskey bottle, chugging hard, only to slam the empty thing down in front of me. I reached for the second bottle, holding it out to him. The actresses assigned to him were still a little awestruck over him, but he was as professional as he could be. He took the second bottle, grabbing my hand gently in order to pull me in to kiss my cheek.

"Fuck, angel…when this is over… I want _your _touch to erase all this bullshit."

Grinning, I shoved him playfully back into the arms of the girls, and he grinned salaciously my way before putting the bottle to his lips, his eyes on mine as he completely ignored the hands on his chest, face, neck and hair.

"And _cut_!" Milton called, and the music stopped while everyone came to a halt. "Excellent job! I think we have all we need." He pointed to Edward and then me, stepping closer. "You two… Amazing chemistry! You know, we could—"

"No, man," Edward said with a chuckle and a slow shake of his head. "Let's keep her out of this."

"Just saying, Masen. She's got a gorgeous face on camera."

"Oh, I'm sure," Edward crooned, nodding once to him, but then he looked to me. "But I'm _selfish_ when it comes to Bella."

I snorted, rolling my eyes at his use of our inside joke, but a gasp caught our attention.

"_You're _Bella!" Heidi snapped, pointing across the bar. "Jesus, Masen…you're fucking a bartender?! Well, isn't that fucking perfect for after rehab?" She grinned, which came out slightly evil, looking like she wanted to spill his secrets to everyone in the bar like she had already with James.

Several people shifted at one time, Edward one of them, but his brother and Jasper caught his shoulders. Hissed curses met my ears, not to mention another string of very creative and extremely humorous insults from Tanya and Kate.

"Cum-dumpster," Tanya muttered, rolling her eyes to Kate. "Can you imagine where she's been?" She shuddered dramatically while wearing a disgusted expression on her face. When Heidi shot her a glare, Tanya merely wiggled her fingers at her in a wave.

"Emmett!" Rose's voice was sharp, like a drill sergeant, and the man in question reached for Heidi, but I walked to where she was standing on the other side of the bar.

"Bella Swan," I told her. "That's _Swan_… As in Chainsaw Charlie Swan's daughter." I pointed toward the pictures and guitar hanging on the walls. "Make sure you spell it right when you call the media, mm'kay?" I asked her, raising an eyebrow at her.

"You can't tell me—"

"No. No, I can't tell you what to do. Nor do I want to," I told her, shrugging a shoulder, but I caught movement along the side of the room where the extras were watching with wide-eyes, not to mention Heidi's assistant moving in closer. "However, make sure you wait until after the show. The media is not allowed in _my building._ And neither is the cell phone your assistant is using…right now."

Emmett's gaze snapped up, and then his head spun to see the poor girl shaking her head as she tried to tuck her phone away quickly, but security moved even faster, snatching the phone away from her. The iPhone was handed over to Emmett, who scrolled through it, shaking his head and looking to Edward.

"All of it. It's all on here… And guess who she was about to send it to, baby brother."

Edward's face was dark when he read the screen. "Laurent. That paps scumbag…" He turned to Rose. "Guess we know how he followed me to rehab, Rosie."

Rose snorted but walked coolly up to Heidi. "Milton, if you're through with her, I think we can let her go now. She's fulfilled her contract for the video."

"Security," Milton stated firmly, but he turned to Heidi as the men gathered her assistant's and Heidi's belongings. "It gets erased or I sue you for breach of contract, maybe even copyright infringement. I'll also make sure that you barely get print work in the future, Miss Summers. No more TV, no more films. Your reputation will be ruined because you can't be trusted. And no, I don't care what Aro says…"

_That_ made her blanch, her face paling under his threat. She looked to Edward, but he was ignoring her. She turned to Milton, then Emmett, but she finally nodded.

Emmett's fingers moved swiftly over the screen, and he handed it back to Heidi's assistant. When Heidi and her people were led to the doors, Emmett made sure to escort them completely outside. The screams of the fans queued up at the door met our ears, and Edward shook his head, bracing his strong, inked arms on the bar top.

"Damn, did he really date her?" one of the extras asked without thinking, but her friend slapped a hand over her mouth to shut her up.

"Unfortunately," Edward answered her anyway, glancing over to the poor thing and shooting her a grin, which made her blush into a fierce red and an embarrassed laugh. He pushed himself away from the bar, to address all the actresses. "Ladies, the rest of you are welcomed to stay for the show. Your bar tab is on me as a thank-you for your hard work and…tolerance."

They all laughed but then cheered.

Edward faced Jasper. "We've got about an hour or so before showtime."

"Guys," I called, jerking my chin toward the back hall. "There's a surprise for you in my office. Eat up, and…good luck."

Edward's brow wrinkled as a sexy smile curled up his beautiful mouth. "What'd you do, angel?"

"It's my baby brother's debut!" I scoffed, pointing to Mike. "You think I wouldn't make his favorite?"

"Shut the fuck up! You made spaghetti?!" Mike gushed, rushing around the bar to push a chuckling Garrett out of the way to get to me. Mike hugged me, lifting me up as I laughed at him. "Thanks, B."

"You're gonna knock 'em dead, Mikey," I whispered in his ear. "And…my dad would be very, _very_ proud of you. You hear me?"

"I miss Charlie," Mike whispered back.

"Me, too." I wriggled to get down and then pushed him gently. "Now…go eat. All of you."

I got hugs and kisses on the cheek from all the guys, including Emmett. The last to step up to me was Edward, who tugged me into the kitchen for a moment. His lips were searing and fierce, and the kiss was merely a taste of what was to come later, I was sure of it. I was a panting mess when he pulled away, pressing his forehead to mine.

"I wish you were up front," he whispered.

"We both have a job to do, but my heart is with you up there."

"Then I'll make sure to let it shine front and center, angel." His words were so very sweet, and his eyes were warm and loving. My Edward was back for just a moment, and just before he kissed my forehead, he said, "I plan on being very, _very_ selfish, Miss Swan."

Grinning, I shook my head, pushing him away, but my reward was his playful smirk and a wink before he disappeared down into my office where I'd set up a lot of food for them just that morning.

I walked back to the bar from the kitchen, nodding to Emmett that he could open the doors to let the people in, but I looked up to Garrett when he stopped me.

"You're right, sweet girl." He nodded a little as he smiled at me. "He's not…what he seems."

"Told you," I sang, pushing him to his end of the bar. "C'mon. We're about to get really fucking busy."

The people started to file in, and since Milton was going to be filming the whole show, he made sure to put them where he wanted them. The servers were busy, the security stationed throughout my whole bar, and the place was noisy, due to sound-tests and tuning of guitars.

Those who were a member of the crew or friends were allowed to sit at the bar out of the camera's eye. I was pretty sure I caught Mr. Milton chatting with the infamous Aro, but the creepy guy with the cheesy ponytail didn't stay for very long. In fact, he looked pretty pissed off when he left. Tanya and Kate sat at my end, Garrett's new girlfriend, Maggie, stayed with him, and Rose, Alice, Carrie, and Marcus were being tended to by Tori. I smiled down to the other end at Maggie, shaking my head at how completely smitten my ex was with his girl. I was glad; I wanted him happy.

Tori, Garrett, and I stayed busy, but I was able to at least see the start of the show. Masen was back after kissing me stupid in the kitchen. He took the stage with an almost overbearing presence, but all the guys were focused. My poor brother looked green with nerves, but it only took a few songs into the concert before he started to relax, started to smile at his bandmates' antics.

Since the video would be focused on the new music they'd just recorded, I didn't know many of the songs, but they did play a few favorites, too. It was well received by the screaming, cheering, whistling audience, not to mention the whole crowd singing with Edward and Jasper.

The bar slowed a bit as the show wore on, and I knew they were just about done. I leaned against the end of the bar to watch them. Mike was doing an amazing job, and he seemed to be accepted by the fans so far, especially when the boys gave him a long solo. As a familiar song came to an end, Edward paced the stage like a lion, but it was Jasper who stepped up to the mic.

"Is everyone havin' a good time?" he asked the crowd, grinning at the uproar that answered him back. "I'd like to thank Charlie's Pub for having us, for putting up with a shit-ton of fuckery for this show."

I chuckled, shaking my head, but Edward's grin and sexy laugh through the speakers caught my attention. He shot a look toward the bar, but I was pretty sure he couldn't see me due to the stage lights blasting his way.

"For those of you who don't know, this place was once owned by Chainsaw Charlie Swan," Edward continued for Jasper, pausing to wait for the fans to settle down. "He was, by far, one of the best blues guitarists in Seattle, if not the world. In honor of him, we're gonna play one of his songs. This is for his daughter, who let us take over her whole world."

Tori sidled up next to me, leaning against my side. "Oh, damn, B…"

"Yeah," I said with a shaky voice, nodding her way.

I'd known about the song, heard bits and pieces of them practicing it, but truly hearing it at a professional level was…heart-stopping.

Jasper's guitar cried out the first few bluesy notes, but it was Edward who pressed his lips to the mic like the kisses I wanted everywhere. My dad had written the song about me, though it had been altered to fit a love song between a couple for popularity's sake. It didn't matter to me; I knew what it meant.

However, it took on a completely different meaning with Edward's beautiful voice crooning the words. He had just enough soul, just enough rasp to bring it to life, but I couldn't tear my eyes from his face, which seemed to be seeking me out, despite the bright lights. He meant every damn word he was singing…to me.

It was all I could do to stay rooted to my post behind the bar, to stay focused on my job. I wanted to rush the stage in a groupie sort of way, but I couldn't, not that Edward would've stopped me. But they weren't finished with the show, nor would my display be something the entire bar full of people needed to see. Edward wasn't the only one who was going to get really, really selfish after this concert was finished.

The song came to a close, and I smiled at Tori, who reached up to wipe away tears that had slipped down my cheeks.

"Charlie would've loved that," she whispered. "And he'd love Masen."

Nodding and sniffling a little, I let out a cleansing breath. "Tell me about it."

Her smile was big and sweet, but she took my shoulders. "Promise me…you wrap that man up and hold on tight. He's so fucking good for you."

A heavy, warm hand landed on my shoulder, and I glanced up to Garrett. "Go, Bella. We've got cleanup. They're on their last song anyway. Besides, the extra servers have started in the kitchen already."

"'Kay." I smiled thankfully at him and stepped through the kitchen doors and into the hallway. I passed by my office and made my way to the side of the stage, where Emmett stood guard.

He shot me a grin. "Bella," he greeted, pulling me forward to stand in front of him so I had the absolute best fucking seat in the house. "When they're done, I'm going to take them into your office until the crowd clears. Okay?"

Nodding that I'd heard him, I leaned between the curtain and the wall to watch the boys play their final song. It was their biggest hit, the finale. My brother was a sweaty mess, but so were the rest of them. Edward played guitar with Jasper, sometimes singing into the same microphone. His strong back flexed with every note played, and I couldn't stop from taking in every inch of him from this fantastic view. A long black-and-white bandanna was tucked haphazardly into his back pocket for him to use to wipe sweat off his face and hands. His ass was defying gravity in the black, worn-out jeans he was sporting. His long, talented fingers flew over the strings, making heavy, sexy notes. His happy, free grin was the most alluring. He'd walk to Jasper, to Jake, then to Alec and Mike as they dragged out the song, simply for the crowd.

I fought my groan when Edward realized where I was. Fuck… His face turned deadly, heated, and absolutely ravenous when he sang toward the side of the stage instead of out toward the crowd. A slow, knowing smile curled up his lips, which made Emmett laugh.

"Okay, so maybe I should just…shove you two out the back to his place."

We weren't going to make it to his place. I knew that much. I felt his gaze all over me as if it were his hands. I heard Emmett on the radio in his ear, and he called Tony for the limo to be brought to the back door of the bar. The boys were going to leave straight out the back, and I smirked at that knowledge, simply because the change of plans meant my office would be empty.

Behind me, the crew prepared to break down the stage and pack up. Marcus stood in the background with a mellow look on his face as he watched the boys take their bows and reach out to touch grasping hands. Even Tanya, Kate, and Alice were busy packing up things. It seemed there was a specific routine they followed after a show.

I barely caught a glimpse of the crowd before the curtains slid closed. However, I did have to be mindful of the cameras that were wandering around, so when Edward set his guitar into the hands of one of the crew, only to face me, I backed up a little. The intensity was rolling off him in waves.

Edward's gaze barely broke from mine when Milton popped up to shake the boys' hands. There was new respect for the man, most likely stemming from how he'd handled Heidi. Though, that last thought made me frown a little, and I shoved the thought of her self-centered ways out of my head.

"Baby bro," Emmett called, pausing to listen to the earpiece in his ear. "Guys, the limo is right out back. Edward, give me a second, and I'll guide you up to—"

"I'll be fine," Edward rasped, taking a bottle of water from a table that had been set up backstage. He guzzled the whole thing, reaching for another one, only to down about half of it before coming up for air.

"Ed…"

"I'm good, Emmett," Edward reiterated, nodding before grabbing for the bandanna in his back pocket and wiping his face. "You've roped off the alley, and the crowd outside will be focused on the limo. No sweat." He gave him a lopsided smile, but his hand reached for mine as Emmett nodded before guiding the boys through the back hall.

Despite how badly my body was humming for Edward, I stopped Mike, grinning up at him. "Don't party too hard, Mikey," I told him, and Edward snorted into a laugh.

"I promise, B," my brother replied, giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Thank you…for this."

I patted the side of his face. "You did awesome! And I think your girl is here…"

Mike grinned, nodding a little. "Yeah, I gave Lauren some tickets. She was like the second table back."

"Then off you go, rock star." I laughed, pushing him into Emmett's hands so that he could be guided out behind the rest of the band.

Edward's hand was still in mine, and I pushed open my office, pulling him in behind me. Though, he closed it softly, clicking the deadbolt home. Despite the noise of the crowd leaving, the bar being cleaned up, and the crew breaking down the stage, the snick of the lock was loud in my ears…or maybe it was in my head. Maybe it was heat rolling off the man standing behind me that had my hair standing up on the back of my neck and everything around me magnified – sounds, smells, and colors. All of it was enhanced to the point that I could hear my breathing coming out in shallow pants.

I needed to tell Edward something, but I wasn't sure I could get the words out, especially when I turned to face him. The look on his face was so damned sexy, so heated, almost hungry, and it was all I could do to force myself to back away to lean against my desk.

"Edward…"

"Angel…"

A slight whimper left me at his voice, even though we'd spoken at the same time.

"Baby, you gotta stop looking at me like that for a second," I told him with a chuckle, holding up a hand. "I just… I need to tell you…"

He grinned salaciously, shaking his head and dragging his tongue slowly and torturously along his bottom lip. "I can't stop, Bella, so whatever it is…_hurry._"

"My dad's song," I rushed out, which brought him up short as he slowly stepped my way. "Thank you."

Masen left the room so fast, only to be instantly replaced with my Edward – my sweet, unsure Edward. "Yeah? It was okay?"

Tears welled up in my eyes at the memory as I nodded vehemently. "Oh, God… It was…beautiful."

His smile was slow, curling half of his pretty lips up on his face. "Thank _you_, Bella…for letting us use it." He reached for my face, his hand slipping into my hair, but his thumb caught the tears that escaped. "I meant it…_every fucking word_." The tone in his voice was slow, deep, and restrained, and my breathing picked up.

Suddenly, I realized it was adrenaline that was feeding this side of him. "Are you like this after every show?" I asked, wanting to know…yet not, because if he was this intense after performing, then letting him leave on tour would be absolutely impossible.

A grin flashed across his face. "Yeah, but…never like this. It's you… Just seeing you watching backstage… I can't explain it."

I smirked up at him as he stepped closer and closer, pressing me into my desk. He was heat and sweat and sex practically throbbing in front of me.

"So…you don't attack the first innocent girl once off stage?"

I flinched at his harsh laugh that almost sounded like a growl. "Oh, hell…_fuck no_!" He narrowed his eyes on me. "No, baby. I don't. I am, however, about to attack my girlfriend, so…" He raised an eyebrow at me in such an alluring way that my hands gripped his T-shirt at his waist in order to pull him closer…or steady my weak knees. I wasn't sure which. "I'm pretty damn sure she made me a promise…"

In spite of all the electricity that was buzzing around us, the giggle I let loose only caused his grin to look even deadlier.

His lips hovered so close to mine that I could feel their heat, feel his steady breathing push out softly across my face. He still smelled like the honey from the tea he'd had before the show. Instead of closing that minute distance, he detoured to my cheek, his lips and breath searing a trail to my ear.

"My girl promised I could be selfish…" He swirled his tongue lightly just beneath my ear.

"She did," I readily agreed, and it came out sounding weak. "She may be a little selfish, too."

The chuckle against my skin was so damned sexy that my hand slipped up his chest and into his hair while the other gripped the back of his T-shirt.

"Edward…" I groaned, and he pulled from my neck, leaving the skin damp with his kisses. "Please…I can't take the teasing."

Long fingers threaded into my hair, tugging my lips to his. There was no preamble, no soft or sweet lips, but pure hunger and want. His tongue was just as sweet as his breath from the honey he'd had earlier, and I relished it, claimed it, loved it.

Something crashed in the hallway, making me jump, but Edward never even flinched. His hands slipped down, gripping my ass and setting me roughly on the top of my desk.

"Ignore it, angel."

Once I'd nodded, we were a flurry of gripping hands and rough kisses. It seemed clothes couldn't disappear quickly enough. I pushed the vest off him as he grabbed for my shirt. Everything started to hit the floor or the chairs behind him. Edward yanked off my sneakers, and I lifted up for him to pull my jeans and underwear down in one swift tug. He stood shirtless before me. I grabbed for his belt, and he laughed when I practically pulled him off balance to undo it and then unzip his jeans. Before I shoved them down over his ass, I reached for his pocket. He carried a condom all the time now. I stopped for a moment, and his face fell as I swallowed nervously.

"Angel? Are you…"

I tossed the condom behind me onto the desk. "I want you…just you."

"Fuck…" he hissed, squeezing his eyes closed. We both knew we were clean. Edward had been tested in rehab, and I was on the shot. We'd had the conversation, but we'd used protection out of habit. "I love you…" he breathed, his hands slamming down onto the desk when I reached out to shove his jeans down just a bit more, repeating the love back to him.

He was heavy, warm, and hard in my hand as I worked up and down his shaft. I was pulled forward to the edge of the desk as his own fingers started to work.

"I want you so wet when I really feel you for the first time, angel," he whispered, pressing his forehead to mine, but his eyes betrayed him. He looked down between us as we continued to touch, to play, to tease.

"Too late."

A grin quirked up his face, but his eyes kept glancing between us. "No shit, baby. I see that. What made you so wet, Bella?"

"Watching you," I answered honestly, nipping at his lips. I tasted and nuzzled to get him to meet my eyes. "Enough…please, Edward. Just…_fuck me_."

If I thought his gaze was heated before, nothing prepared me for his reaction. He knocked my hands away from his cock and reached for my knees, spreading me wide open. He lined up at my entrance and then sank into me swiftly, deeply. My head fell back as the feeling of completion washed over me.

"Jesus Christ," he grunted through gritted teeth. His fingers dug into my ass as he steadied himself. Papers and files fell to the floor as he started an almost brutal rhythm, bending me back over my desktop. "God, you feel so…fucking good…" He pressed a hand to my shoulder, easing me back so that my shoulders met the cool wood. "I wanna watch every inch of you get fucked on this desk, Bella."

One of his hands held my thigh while the other teased my nipple piercings. My gasps of pleasure, of begging for more, couldn't be stopped, and I honestly didn't care if we were heard. He felt amazing, and despite how deeply he was fucking me, his touch was reverent and so loving that my orgasm was barreling down on me quicker than I'd expected.

"I'm…I'm…"

"I know you are, angel…" He bent over me, dragging tongue and lips across my now sweaty skin, finally toying with my hard nipples. He swirled his tongue around both peaks, grinning when my body arched up for more and my heels dug into his ass. "So close, so close…" he purred against my lips. "What will it take to send you over, baby?"

He braced a hand by my head while his other hand slipped between us. His teeth raked across one of my piercings at the same time his talented fingers – the same callused fingers that had played the guitar only minutes ago – found my swollen, needy clit.

He played me like he played music, commanding me, owning me. He drew it out, swiveling his hips in order to hit the spot deep inside me that caused every inch of me to unravel. I shattered beneath him, my breathing stopping momentarily as everything exploded. I saw stars as I gripped onto his hair, his bicep, anything I could grasp. He gathered me into his arms and into a sitting position as he rode out my spasms.

Wrapping my arms around his neck and dragging teeth and lips up his throat, I whispered, "I love you, Edward…"

"I…I…" He faltered, grunting and panting. "So fucking much… I…"

I kissed the shit out of him as I felt his thrusts start to lose rhythm. My fingers made purchase on his ass and in his hair as I met him push for push. It only took a few more before he was buried as deep as he could go, gripping my hair as he finally exploded.

"Fuck…" he breathed, his forehead falling to mine and then to my shoulder. His strong arms wound all the way around me as he tried to catch his breath. Hugging him close with my arms and legs, I kept him inside me as long as I could.

"I'm never… I've… Sweet fuck, Bella…"

Grinning, I turned to drop a kiss to his cheek. "Amen."

He huffed a breathless laugh, pulling back just to kiss my lips sweetly. "My bed or yours, angel?"

I raised an eyebrow. "Mine is closer."

He laughed, nodding a little. "Indeed, and that's a good thing. I'm still feeling selfish."

I giggled, kissing his lips before we separated and quickly got dressed in order to head to my apartment…or his. I didn't care. We'd survived the night, the filming, and we'd survived Heidi. Now…we had to survive his leaving soon. I wasn't ready, but I didn't have a choice. However, for now, I'd take what I could get.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… They survived the video shoot. And Miss Heidi wasn't quite aware of what she was walking into…**

**There's more to do before Edward leaves on tour, so we'll be back in his POV next chapter, which will be Wednesday.**

**QUESTIONS... There were a few wishes that Heidi, Aro, and James would get run over…repeatedly. One question was posed... Only James signed a non-disclosure agreement. NOT HEIDI. She would have for the very first video shoot, but not for a personal relationship with Masen. Not the smartest move, but…it's personal, so what can you do?**

**If I had to pick a song for Chainsaw Charlie, it would be "Pride and Joy," if only for the sound and words. I'll put it up on the playlist.**

**Okay…the playlists and pics are in their usual spots. I'll see you guys back here on Wednesday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	14. Your Face of Light

**A/N… The video was a big hit with all of you. Thank you so much! Now time will barrel down on leaving for the tour, but Edward has some responsibilities to attend to first. **

**I'll let you get to it…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 14 – Your Face of Light**

_If I can get through tonight,  
I'm waking up with my wings.  
There's no way I can sleep my way through a fight,  
And I think I'm gonna like what tomorrow brings.  
Look at my eyes,  
Don't even know who I am.  
That's how I spend all my worthless time on the floor,  
Waiting for you to tell me I'm a man._

_But you and your face of light._  
_It's a brilliant roman candle that separates the day from the night._  
_It's that clean, clear truth that sorts out the wrong from the right._  
_You and your face of light_

"_Face of Light" by Rival Sons_

**EDWARD**

"Sweet _fuck_," I hissed, my head falling back to the tile of the shower. "Bella…angel…"

Her laugh was low, evil, and pushing her breath across my cock. The hum vibrated softly, and my dick twitched at the feel. My hand slipped into her wet hair and gripped hard. Not to hurt but to stop myself from either ramming forward…or slipping and busting my ass. Either was possible at this point. We were slick and warm, and there wasn't a huge amount of space, but I'd been unable to let her go when the alarm sounded.

I didn't fucking _dare_ look down. The sight of her beautiful mouth on me would send me over the edge. For the moment, I let myself feel, just _be_. I took, even though it was selfish; it was such a douchebag, _guy_ thing to do, but I couldn't help it. She felt so damned good, and I needed one last distraction before I faced the day. And it wasn't like I didn't give. My girl had come like a freight train more than one time last night. I'd lost count after three, and that didn't include the phenomenal desk-fucking in her office after the show.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," I groaned, making the stupid mistake of finally meeting those stunning dark eyes gazing up at me, at those perfect lips on me. "I'm…I'm…"

She hummed again, and I was done, just fucking wrecked. I came hard, with a pitiful sound echoing out of me in that small shower. I'm fairly sure I sounded like a wounded animal, but my give-a-shit was currently hitting the back of her throat, rendering me unable to see, much less care what noises I was making.

I huffed a laugh that had nothing to do with humor, a tremor running through my whole being. I practically sagged, but Bella's hands slipped up my body, keeping me against the tile.

"Don't move, angel. I may take us both out," I panted, grinning at her adorable giggle. "That was… I'm… Yeah, I'm fucking stupid."

I could feel her grin against the skin of my throat, and her voice was soft. "I wouldn't let you fall, baby."

"Hmm," I hummed, finally able to see straight. "This shower was not made for two people."

She laughed, turning to rinse her hair. "Honestly, Edward, considering this was my dad's shower… I'd rather not think about it."

Huffing a laugh, I turned off the water and reached for a towel. I secured it around my waist, grabbing another one to hand to Bella. We'd left the bar after the show and surprised ourselves that we made it to my apartment, but it had been her idea, since we didn't know if Mike was coming back to her place or not. And we both had somewhere to be today.

The thought made me frown as I stepped out of the shower and onto the rug. I steadied Bella as she did the same. Walking into the main part of the apartment, I let her have the bathroom space. I rummaged through drawers and my closet, trying to find something appropriate for the day.

I settled for a pair of boxer-briefs, and once they were on, I sat on the edge of my bed. The scent of the two of us from the night before wafted around me. It was something comforting and perfect, sexy and alluring. It was a scent that I now associated with Bella. It was us. And now that the video and concert were finished, it was a scent I'd soon be without for months. It would be replaced by the sterile smell of hotel rooms or the closed-up space of a tour bus, never mind the smells that a plane contained. Time would barrel down on us, and it scared the ever-loving shit out of me.

"Edward?"

Her feet appeared in my vision as I glared hard at the floor. My elbows were resting on my knees, but I reached out to pull her between my legs. Navy-blue lace and something silky barely covered her, but my eyes drank her in. My fingers trailed over her ink, teased the piercing in her bellybutton, and finally my gaze raked up her glorious form to her pretty face.

"Fuck, you're just…every damn dream I've ever had."

She snorted into a chuckle. "You're just saying that because your brains are still fried from the shower."

"Yes. Yes, they are." Her adorable smile made me lean in to kiss her belly, but my fear was still there. And it didn't help that today would be…difficult.

"You okay?" she asked into the top of my head, her fingers raking through slowly.

I sighed deeply into her stomach, turning my head to the side. Her heartbeat was steady, soothing, and her skin was warm. I shrugged a shoulder, but I should've known she wouldn't let that rest. She pushed at me until I finally sat back a little.

"Talk to me."

"I don't know about today, Bella," I stated, frowning down at my hands. "I don't…want to do this."

"You don't have to," she said, and I snapped my gaze back to her face. "You _should_, but you don't have to."

Narrowing my eyes at her sweet, falsely innocent smile, I mumbled, "Not fair, angel."

She laughed, grabbing either side of my face in her hands. "Listen, I'll be with you, but you really need to talk to your mom, baby. You don't need me to tell you that. And your brother and Rose will be there."

"I know, I know," I grumbled, snorting when she squished my face. "Bewwa…"

Her laugh was hilarious. "Oh, if only the Masen fans could see this shit."

"Shut up." I laughed in spite of it all, shaking my head at her. It was moments like this that made me love her so fucking much. My laugh ended quickly, and I gazed pleadingly up at her. "It's the country club, though." I was whining. I _knew_ I was whining, but I was still nursing my wounded pride when it came to my mother.

"So?" she scoffed, shrugging a shoulder, and her touch to my face was a little firmer. "Edward, you could buy and sell just about all of them, so don't tell me it's about people with money." She sighed when I didn't say anything. "I know that you're judged, but hell, I will be, too, considering they don't know me. You really have to walk in there like… Well, like Masen. Use him to walk into the place with his usual air of dominance. I've told you before, and I'll say it again…you own the rooms you enter, and any stares or whispers will be that of want and jealousy. And really, who gives a shit what they think? But when it comes to your mom, baby, you've really got to let go of what happened. No one was honest throughout the entire event with your dad – _especially your dad_ – so you need to give her a chance, okay?"

I nodded, turning my head in her hands to kiss the inside of her wrist. It was so fucking easy to perform in front of hundreds, even thousands of people, but the mere idea of walking into the club to see my mother had me backpedaling.

"Besides," she said with a grin. "I'm kinda looking forward to seeing you dressed up."

Chuckling, I shook my head, feeling my face heat with that. "I've been told I clean up well."

She laughed, pushing away from me, and reached into my closet only to come away with my dark-blue suit still in the plastic from the cleaners. Hell, I hadn't worn it since one of Heidi's premieres.

"Monkey suit," I teased her.

"Get dressed, Edward," she ordered, rolling her eyes at me and walking back into the bathroom.

I did as she said, hating every second of it. It wasn't the suit part of it but the bracing myself for the country club, for being face to face with my mother. I fidgeted with my tie, grumbling about never getting it right, but the sound of heels on my wood floors made me spin around.

The smile that curled up my face had to have been all sorts of evil, because Bella merely laughed at me. She was fucking stunning. It was a simple black dress, but she just made it all the more…just _more_.

"I've never seen an angel in black. You look beautiful, Bella. Let's blow this lunch off, and I'll take you any-fucking-where you want."

She blushed but shook her head as she reached for my tie. "Shut up, Edward. We're going. Now hold still."

Grinning at her no-nonsense attitude, I leaned back against my dresser. Her eyes were warm, sweet, and focused on the knot she was tying. I couldn't stop myself; once the knot was straight, she reached up to fix my collar, and my hands landed on her hips.

"You can do this, Edward."

Swallowing nervously, I nodded, only to pull away and fidget. I tugged at my tie and collar, buttoned my coat, and pulled at my cuffs, realizing that suit or no fucking suit…not all my ink could be hidden. The spider web on the back of my hand was a loud and clear reminder of just how different I was compared to the people I was about to see.

"Stop, baby," she chuckled. "You look very handsome." Her amusement was replaced with sympathy. "Relax, and if you get nervous, just hold my hand." She stepped back and held her hand out for me, but her eyes trailed down my suit to my shoes, where she let out a giggle. "So…Masen _will_ be joining us for lunch," she guessed with an adorably raised eyebrow.

I shifted in place, tapping the toes of my Docs. "You can take the guy out of the band…"

Laughing softly, she grabbed my hand and tugged me along. "Let's go, Edward."

Rose had offered Tony's services to us, but I'd declined. I wanted to drive us, not for any other reason but to give myself a sense of control. If shit went badly, then I wanted to get the hell out of there. The drive was quiet, with the occasional song coming through the speakers of my car.

Bella seemed relaxed as she gazed out the window, but I realized that not much really rattled her. She was so damned comfortable in her own skin. She knew herself, where she stood on just about everything, and she honestly didn't care what people thought about her. Not strangers, anyway. She had a small circle, and that circle counted. Anything outside of that simply didn't matter.

I pulled into the country club, opting to park my own car, if only because I needed a second before I had to face this shit.

Bella waited patiently, and I spun my gaze to hers. "Were you always this way? So…_fucking calm_ about everything?"

Her laugh snorted out of her, but she shook her head no. "No, not always. I just…" She took a deep breath and let it out, the humor slipping from her expression. "When you've been through the really hard things, then stuff like this, even if it's uncomfortable, doesn't really rank on the nerves scale, you know?"

"Your dad?"

"Yeah," she answered, nodding a little as her nose scrunched up in the middle the way I loved so much. She shrugged a shoulder. "Edward, life is scary and short and unpredictable. It's all those things. It's too many of those things not to take advantage of situations like this. When you see your mom, just be honest. You're about to leave for _months_, and I think you'd regret not seeing her, not telling her what least that way, you know you tried." She pointed a finger at the window. "These people…they don't count. They know nothing of you…her…your dad. Just…forget they exist. Treat them as if they're a member of your audience…the ones who only see the surface shit."

"You prioritize better than me," I noted in a grumpy tone, but I smiled when she leaned over in the seat to press a kiss to my cheek.

"Maybe." She smiled against my jaw. "Am I nervous about meeting your mother? Yes, if only because I love you, and I want you happy, so I hope her opinion of me doesn't make you upset. But will her opinion of me change the way I feel about you? No, sir. Not a chance."

A grin spread over my face that I couldn't stop. "I love you, too, angel."

Her expression was adorable, silently asking me, _So…what's the problem?_

With a deep breath, I opened the car door and walked around to open Bella's. I kept her hand in mine as we approached the building. The doorman saw us coming, and it took him a moment to break into a smile.

"Masen. Welcome back, sir," he greeted.

"Paul." I gave him a nod and a smile. He was a fan, though he was discouraged from saying anything, which irked me to no end, but he'd lose his job. He also hid every bit of ink he had – again…job policy.

"Your mother is in the private dining room, and Mr. and Mrs. Cullen have already joined her."

Thanking him, I guided Bella toward the restaurant, steeling myself against the stares and whispers that I should've been used to but wasn't. The hostess took our coats, and I slipped into the Masen persona, if only to get through the dining room.

I'd forgotten completely that my dad would be missed, that his absence and rumor of where he truly was would've gotten around. How…I had no idea, but my mother's friends probably weren't as tight-lipped as she assumed they were.

The hostess reached for the door of the private room, opening it for us with a look of superiority all over her face.

When she met my harsh gaze, she mellowed out a bit, but I couldn't help but say, "It would be greatly appreciated…" I glanced down to her nametag. "Susan… We would like minimal interruption in here, so if you could pass that on…" I said it loud enough to gain the attention of my family, and I ignored Emmett's chuckle and my mother's gasp.

"Yes, Mr…um, Masen."

Bella fought her smile like a champ, her thumb rubbing a continuous circuit over the ink on the back of my hand. Over and over, around and around, it was almost hypnotic but soothing, too. And I couldn't even form the words to how grateful I was that she was with me.

Stepping into the room, I heard Susan close the door softly behind us. Emmett was up and out of his chair, pulling me into a rough hug.

"Relax, baby bro," he whispered in my ear, pulling away to turn to Bella. "Bella!" He grinned and then whistled low. "Well, hot damn…you look…"

"Shut up, Emmett," Rose sighed impatiently, but her gaze on Bella was soft and kind. "Bella…" She pulled my girl into a hug, whispering softly in her ear.

I faced the table, expecting my mother to still be sitting, but she wasn't. She was standing in front of me, shifting nervously on her feet. It was the big, fat tears that had me feeling like an ass.

"Mom, I…"

Before I could blink, she rushed to me, wrapping her arms around me in a hug so tight it knocked the wind out of me.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen," she sobbed, pulling back to cup my face. "You…" She sniffled, sighed, and then sagged a little. "I don't know whether to kiss you or put you over my knee!"

Bella snorted softly, making Emmett laugh. "I say the second option would make fuck-awesome leaked photos. Hold up! Lemme get my phone out."

Rose smacked my brother, rolling her eyes at him and snatching his phone away when he actually pulled it out of his pocket.

Frowning at my mother, I simply shrugged. "I guess we need…to talk." Mom studied my face and nodded, but she turned toward Bella, so I waved my girl forward. "Mom, this is Bella Swan. Angel, this is Esme Cullen…my mother."

The term of endearment caught my mother's attention, but she offered Bella her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Bella. I've heard a lot about you from Emmett and Rose."

Bella's face blushed a little, but she smiled warmly. "It's nice to meet you, too, Mrs. Cullen."

"Please, call me Esme," Mom insisted kindly and then turned her sharp gaze back to me. "Swan…Swan… Where do I know that name?"

"Chainsaw Charlie Swan, Mom," Emmett piped up with a big grin.

"The blues musician?" Mom gaped at Bella with something akin to respect and awe. "I saw him play once…a long time ago. He was very good. I also remember his passing. Terrible thing. I'm sorry for your loss, Bella."

"Thank you," Bella whispered in shock, her beautiful eyes wide when she shot a look to me.

Mom laughed softly. "My boys aren't the only ones who appreciate good music." She turned to me, patting my face, but the humor was gone from the moment, especially when a couple of servers stepped into the room. "I took the liberty of ordering for us because I want as little interruptions as possible."

Nodding, I took a deep breath but walked to the table to hold a chair out for Bella, dropping a kiss to the top of her head, if only to take in the smell of her, the scent that calmed me. The kiss didn't go unnoticed…by _anyone_ in the room – my mother, the servers, Rose, or Emmett. The latter two were used to it, but my mother, not so much. She'd only dealt with Heidi a handful of times, and even those were in large party settings, nothing as intimate as this, but I'd never, _ever_ shown any affection toward her in public, other than hand-holding. It just wasn't how Heidi and I had been. Heidi liked to be _seen_ in public but didn't want _affection_ in public. With Bella, I simply couldn't stop myself, and my girl was comfortable no matter what I did.

I took my seat at Bella's side, and immediately, her hand landed on my leg to not only still its bouncing but to comfort. I linked our fingers together. Once the food was served, the wait-staff left the room. There was an eerie silence, and I couldn't take it. Shrugging out of my suit coat, I rolled up my sleeves and loosened my tie.

"Fucking monkey suit," I muttered, shaking my head at Bella's soft laugh.

"Edward, language."

"My apologies, Mom, but you might wanna brace yourself. It won't be the last time before this lunch is over," I advised her, grimacing at the truth of that, but I picked up a fork, only to turn to her. "Before I do this…tell you what happened, I just… Did you know? About Dad?" My eyes raked all over her face, and with just her nervous frown, the adjustment of the napkin on her lap, and her blank gaze at the plate in front of her, I knew the answer, but I waited.

She took a deep breath, looking to Emmett and then to me. "I did. I didn't want to acknowledge it, but I did. I saw it happening, but… You must understand, it started so long ago that it slowly became the norm, and I didn't realize your father had lost control of it. Hell, it was probably always there, but not as severe as the last few years. He hid it. Every day, he hid it from me."

I shot a glance across the table to Rose, who'd guessed that very thing. She'd even said it in Charlie's Pub, but she wouldn't gloat. That wasn't my sister-in-law. She didn't want to be right, and her face held sympathy and a touch of anger.

Nodding, I let that sink in as I took a few bites of food I didn't really want, nor could I really taste. "Yeah, that's what he told me…just before he left for rehab."

Shooting a quick glance Bella's way, I realized she'd be hearing the details of that night for the first time right along with my mother. What she did know was only the basics. With that thought, I took a deep breath and steeled myself.

Looking to Mom, I said, "The night of the accident, I saw Dad. We all did." I gestured to Rose and Emmett with my fork. "Heidi's manager had thrown a function at a hotel downtown – something for charity but using her clothes ad. We'd just gotten back into town, and I hadn't seen her, so I met her there. We all went. We practically came straight from the airport. I guess she'd sent an invitation to you guys."

"She did," Mom answered, "but I couldn't make it. It was the same night as Mrs. Bowers' birthday party. I'd been a part of setting it up, so I had to go."

I nodded. "Yeah, well… Dad went. And he was three sheets to the wind by the time we got there." Sighing deeply, I went on. "Heidi was busy…mingling." I snorted, rolling my eyes at the memory of James being there, not to mention Heidi's co-star in her movie, Peter Grisham. "I sat with Dad, and I had a few beers with him, though he was knocking back vodka tonics like there was no tomorrow."

I set my fork down a little too hard, but my hands balled up into fists on my lap. Bella's hand covered mine gently, and I unfolded my fingers in order to lace ours together.

"I didn't _know_, Mom," I told her. "I didn't know he was on-call at the hospital. I didn't know he'd drive. I thought he'd grab a cab home, or at the least let Rose drive him, since she wasn't drinking that night."

"How could you have known, son?" Mom asked. "He wasn't going to tell you. And he sure wouldn't have acknowledged that he was too drunk to drive, much less go into the hospital."

Nodding in agreement, I continued. "He stayed at the bar, no matter what I did. I tried to keep him company, simply because it wasn't his usual scene. He didn't know anyone, and it was kinda cool that he came, you know?" I asked, opening my mouth only to close it for a moment. I wanted to tell her that I'd been pretty stoked that he'd been there, since he so rarely attended functions from my world.

Turning to my right, I locked gazes with Bella. _She _got it. Instantly. She knew what it would've meant to have my dad there, if only because he didn't like the whole fame/celebrity thing. She smiled sadly, rubbing my forearm for encouragement.

I bit my bottom lip, glaring at my plate. "I was so tired. We'd just gotten back from touring Japan, and I was so fucking ready for time at home before we started recording. Months home in Seattle sounded like heaven to me. Downtime was so rare, so I was looking for to it. The beers and the couple glasses of champagne I'd downed had made me relaxed, too relaxed, really, because I was so damned exhausted and I hadn't really eaten anything. I told Heidi I'd see her at home, and Rose, Emmett, and I went to see if Dad wanted a ride home, and then…his phone rang."

What I didn't add, because it was a moot point, was that Heidi hadn't cared whether or not I'd been there. She'd greeted me enthusiastically, shown me off to all her colleagues, but let me go at the first opportunity. Knowing what I knew now, I could see that she'd most likely fucked around with either James or Peter…hell, maybe even both. I didn't care. I didn't want to know. And I sure as shit didn't want to know details. It worked out for the best anyway, and that thought made me bring Bella's hand up to my lips for a moment.

"I thought maybe it was you," I told my mother, and she nodded. "But he didn't stay on long, and he stood up to pay his tab. I thought he'd ride with us. He said he needed the restroom, so I told him to meet us outside." Shaking my head slowly, I added, "He didn't show."

"He left." My mother's guess was spot-on, and I nodded, my gaze still on my barely touched plate.

"He did," I whispered, looking her way. "He either avoided me, or he completely forgot about us in his drunken stupor, but he never showed up. I…I…I tried calling his cell, but he didn't answer. By the time they'd brought Rose's car around, I'd almost decided to go looking for him, but he called me back." Squeezing my eyes closed, I shook my head to clear it, but I let out a sigh. "He was frantic. Scared shitless, really. I could hear the sound of the car beeping, but he was screaming at me to come to him, about an accident. I figure the only reason it was _me_ he called was because I'd just called him. He'd simply hit the call-back button. If it had been any other way, it wouldn't have worked."

I looked to my mom, who was wide-eyed at the possibilities, the could-have-beens.

Looking to Rose, I sighed, but I needed to finish the story. "We dove into the car, and Rose took the street from parking garage, trying to find him. He didn't get far, for sure, and luckily there was hardly any traffic that late at night. He'd run a red light a couple of blocks up, T-boning a minivan in the intersection, sending it into some…some sort of fountain or pool. Hell, the cops hadn't even been called yet. The timing was fucking perfect." I whispered that last sentence in awe, because we would've never been able to pull any of the shit off otherwise.

"What about the other driver?" Bella asked so softly, but her voice startled me a little.

Turning her way, I said, "Bree's mother…"

Bella nodded, frowning a little.

"She hadn't even come out of the car yet, but it had been her to call the police. The airbag saved her from any injuries, but when she hit the fountain, the side Bree was on collided with the statue in the middle, so…her injuries were…understandable. It also spun her around so that she wasn't facing my dad's Mercedes. Shit, she never saw us pull up…or who got out of the car, so…" I shrugged, gazing over at my mother. "Dad was…a fucking mess. He'd gotten out of the car, grabbed Emmett, and was pleading… No," I groaned, my hand gripping at my hair as I shook my head. "Not pleading. He was sobbing. He was absolutely terrified. He came at me with wild eyes, and…and he…he grabbed my shirt, begging me to help him. That he'd been on-call. He was…crazed and completely trashed, but he scared me, Mom. I just…

"When the sound of sirens started to get closer, he flipped the fuck out. Just…lost his shit. I…I couldn't… I didn't…" I floundered for the right words, swallowing nervously. "I froze for a second, but when I saw the police cruiser pull up, followed by the ambulance, I gripped Dad's arm. I told him that if I took care of it, he needed to get help, that he needed to stop drinking; I made him fucking _swear to me_. And he did; he _promised me. _Though, he didn't mean it; he just wanted help at the moment. He broke his promise, stopped coming to meetings.

"All… All I could see was his fear, and the mere thought of what would happen _to you_ should he get caught…it was all too much, but… I knew… I knew I could deal with it better than he could. I also knew that it wouldn't…touch my reputation. I told Emmett and Rose to get his ass in her car. I… When I faced the officer, I simply told him I'd been driving. It all fit. I failed the Breathalyzer, due to my own drinking, and Dad and I are just about the same height, so the seat in the Mercedes wasn't moved. Bree was removed from the van, and she was okay, just that broken arm and some cuts. Her mother was fine, so Rose was quick to start calling Jenks to get to work, not to mention play witness to everything, because we'd been so close by, and I let them take me in. And I did it all as…Masen. I played it all up. I said that I'd left the party in my dad's car, that they'd tried to stop me, and I thought I could drive. Me being…well, _me_, they ate it up – never even questioned it. Rock star, Masen, known for partying and drinking and wild actions…the cops puffed up when they put the cuffs on me. They believed every damn word."

I shrugged a shoulder once I was finished.

Bella wrapped and arm around my shoulder, whispering into my ear, "Still stupid, Edward. Brave and understandable, but stupid."

Grinning, I nodded, leaning into the kiss to my jaw. "Yeah, I know."

She smiled against my cheek but then backed away. My mother was quiet but watching us with an unreadable look in her eyes.

Mom gazed slowly around the table, only to land on Bella. "Bella, you'll have to forgive me…" She faced Emmett, then Rose, and finally me. "All of you are reckless and…and… I don't even know what to say. Bella's right. Stupid. Brave but damned stupid. Do you have any idea what would've happened had they seen through your lies? Do you? More trouble than you took upon yourself to take on, and you know it." She shook her head slowly, toying with the napkin on her lap again, her eyes downcast. "He's such a damn fool. I can't _believe _he asked this of you…of his own _children_!"

My heart shattered at the tears streaming down her face when she finally looked to me.

"Mom, I…"

She reached forward, pulling me close in order to kiss my forehead. "Stupid, stupid, stupid," she sobbed against my skin. "Did he even _think_? What if that mother and little girl had been killed?! He'd have sent my boy away to _jail_! All because he was a drunken coward! I want to wring his damn neck!"

I wanted to laugh at her words, but I couldn't. There wasn't anything funny about this shit. Not a single bit of it. Because of my father's actions, my mother was hurting.

"I'm sorry," I whispered once she'd pulled back, but she was still cupping my face. "I shouldn't have, but..."

"But nothing, son," she said to me in a firm voice. "You're right, you shouldn't have, but your father should've never, _ever_ put you in that position."

I opened my mouth to say something.

"My sweet boy, listen to me; I'm well aware that you'd have done it for anyone at this table. And as brave as that makes you, as _loyal_ as that makes you to your friends and family… Edward, you are your own man, with a career and a life to lead. It wasn't your responsibility to suffer for him."

"Suffer," I scoffed, rolling my eyes and shaking my head. "I didn't _suffer_, Mom. Hell, I had my own room, caught up on sleep, not to mention therapy was a place I could get some stuff off my chest, and…I learned who I could and couldn't trust."

Bella's fingers slipped into mine, and I shrugged a shoulder when I gazed over at my pretty girl.

Mom scowled. "You were always too good for that Heidi. You can slather frosting on shit, but that doesn't make it a cake."

Despite the tension in the room, that statement coming from my mother was hilarious. The table broke up into soft chuckles, only to completely shatter into belly-holding laughter.

I squeezed Bella's fingers gently but turned to my mother, saying, "I'm good now, Mom. Trust me."

Mom smirked, looking from Bella to me. "I see that."

We quieted down when the wait-staff stepped back into the room, simply to check on us. They poured some water, took away some dishes, and left quickly. Our room stayed quiet once the door shut closed.

Mom pushed her plate away from her, folding her hands on the tabletop. "Okay, you three," she said, pointing to Rose, Emmett, and then me. "When do you leave?"

Rose glanced my way but answered her softly. "We'll be kicking off the tour in Boston. We fly out in two weeks…well, ten days, I suppose."

Mom nodded solemnly. "So you won't be home for Thanksgiving… What about Christmas? New Year's?"

I shook my head sadly, my heart hurting, because I was leaving my mom alone with this shit with Dad. And…I was leaving the best thing that had ever happened to me.

"Mom, I'm… I… I wish it was different, but we probably won't get back until well into February, and that'll only be for a few days."

"I can get you the itinerary, Esme," Rose offered. "If I'm remembering correctly, we'll be in Providence, Rhode Island, for Thanksgiving and New York for Christmas. New Year's…I'm not sure…Nashville? I'd have to look."

"We'd fly you out, Mom," Emmett offered. "Anywhere you wanted. You, too, Bella." He shot her a wink when my girl smiled his way.

"Well, perhaps we can figure something out, but…" Mom trailed off, her face so very sad, and I was pretty sure she was afraid to even make plans due to my dad's situation. "Have you spoken to your father?"

"Not since he checked in," I replied softly, "but I was going on family day…tomorrow. You going?"

My heart sank when she shook her head no.

"I hate this shit," I muttered, shaking my head. I let go of Bella's hand in order to rake my fingers through my hair. "I feel…guilty. I feel like I fucked up, somehow."

"You did not!" Bella suddenly piped up, and her face was fierce and angry when I snapped my head over to her. Her face flushed pink, but she shook her head. "I'm sorry," she whispered, "but you didn't fuck up, Edward. Sorry, Esme… But none of you did." She took a deep breath and continued. "Your dad has a problem, but it's not your fault." She tapped her temple. "His head… It's in a really bad place. He… There's not a chance in hell he could've made a good decision. He thought you and Emmett hated him. He was convinced his wife was leaving him, yet he couldn't stop asking for another drink. That's all on him. And if he's seriously using rehab to get better, not merely to appease all of you, then he'll be atoning for a lot of stuff soon."

"Twelve steps," I surmised, nodding a little.

"Yeah," she sighed, her sweet nose wrinkling a little. "It's none of my business, I know, but…from what I've seen, you've all tried to help."

"I didn't, Bella," Mom admitted softly, her eyes welling up. "I ignored it."

Bella's smile was warm and sad but probably the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. "No, you trusted your husband. You wanted to see the good. Not the bad. It happens in this situation. It's perfectly normal. However, all of you will have a long road ahead of you when he comes to you, and he will…"

"_If_ he's really trying," I added bitterly.

"If he's really trying," she agreed, nodding, and she reached for my hand again. I gave it willingly.

When I glanced over to my mother, I snorted at her confused face. "Bella was studying to be a psychologist," I told her but turned to kiss Bella's cheek, only to whisper in her ear. "Damn sexy therapist, I'm tellin' ya."

Bella rolled her eyes, pushing me playfully away from her neck.

"Mom…" Emmett started, his usually happy demeanor gone. "Come with us tomorrow."

She shook her head no, and my big, laidback brother looked like he'd cry. "I can't, bear. I just can't. Not after hearing the whole story. He _lied _to me, convinced me that my youngest son was responsible for it all, when my heart, my soul wasn't buying it. He…he put the three of you in the most god-awful bind without a thought as to what could've happened. He could've killed that little girl, he could've sent my baby boy to prison, he could've killed himself, and he could've lost his medical license, and while that last one is low on the list of priorities…" She huffed a humorless laugh. "If he thought things were bad already, then to take away his license, his career, would ruin him. If he couldn't practice medicine…I know your father…he'd feel his life was over."

"Which is probably what caused him to panic that night to start with," Rose added sadly.

"Probably." Mom's voice was soft and weary. "I have some thinking to do concerning your father, and in order to do that, I need…time."

Emmett and I locked scared, panicked gazes. We were grown men, but the idea that my parents' marriage was now shaky, now in jeopardy, made us both freak the fuck out.

Before we could say anything, Bella's kind, gentle voice asked, "Would you like us to give him a message tomorrow?"

Mom's smile was warm but wavering, and she nodded. "Just tell him I… Just tell him the truth, that I'm not ready."

We nodded, and I glanced over the table. We hadn't eaten much, but I wasn't really hungry. And from the blank stares around the table, I wasn't alone, though I worried about Bella.

The club's servers stepped into the room again, and Mom told them to clear the table, that we were finished. They did so in complete silence, but I could see that one of the girls knew me. Her eyes betrayed her, not to mention her hands shook, but I didn't have it in me to play the part. I just couldn't. She and another guy filled their trays and left the room again.

My mother stood up, which was the sign that we were done, and we all followed her lead. She reached for me again, hugging me close, only to pull back and cup my face.

"Edward, you… Please, please be safe, champ." She reached for Emmett when he stepped up to my side, saying, "You, too. Take good care of each other. I don't say it enough, but I'm so very proud of you…no matter what you've come to believe. Okay?" We both nodded, and she smirked a little. "That being said… Knock 'em dead, boys."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… As much as Edward didn't want to see his mother, he needed to go. It was the **_**right**_** thing to do, especially since he's leaving. And when it came down to the wreck…TIMING WAS EVERYTHING. It wasn't a huge undertaking, just good timing. Had they not all been that close, not been so late at night, it wouldn't have worked. Not to mention, **_**Masen **_**being on the scene probably didn't help; the cops saw him, saw **_**who **_**he was, took his word, and arrested him there. Edward shouldn't have done it – and he knows it – but he did; now everyone has to deal with Carlisle's actions. Drunken actions, at that. **

**Now…before I catch all the hellfire and brimstone for this… **_**This has been done and will most likely happen again**_**.**** I've heard friends tell stories of switching drivers on the scene – for whatever reasons – and it worked. One of my prereaders told a story of being in wreck and the driver tried to switch. That guy was caught. Sometimes, it happens and works. Sometimes, it doesn't. Doesn't make it right, but it is the truth of the matter.**

**And if you haven't guessed, a visit to Carlisle is next. We'll see how Serenity is working for him.**

**The playlist and the pics are in their usual places. The next update will be Sunday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	15. The Best of You

**A/N… I wanna take a second and thank all of you for your support of this story. It means so much. The topic of addiction, much like the topic of cheating, brings with it a **_**plethora**_** of opinions and "they should've/could've/would've." Not a single bit of it is black and white. EVER. Just keep that in mind.**

**I took a Hollywood-style liberty with Serenity – high-end, spa-like facility that comes with more perks than the usual rehabs, which is **_**vastly **_**different than state-run facilities, trust me. Actually, I stole the whole grounds from the TV show **_**House M.D. **_**when he went to rehab. LOL Just keep that in mind.**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 15 – The Best of You**

_Has someone taken your faith?  
Its real, the pain you feel  
The life, the love you'd die to heal  
The hope that starts the broken hearts  
You trust, you must  
Confess_

_Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?_  
_Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?_

_I've got another confession my friend_  
_I'm no fool_  
_I'm getting tired of starting again_  
_Somewhere new_

_Were you born to resist or be abused?_  
_I swear I'll never give in_  
_I refuse_

"_The Best of You" – Foo Fighters_

**EDWARD**

"Carlisle Cullen," Emmett said to the girl at the reception desk.

"Okay, just have a seat," she told us, pointing to the row of chairs along the wall of windows. Then her eyes caught sight of me, and she smiled. "Masen, it's good to see you again."

"Candice," I greeted softly. "You, too."

She smiled but pointed again to the chairs. "Give us a second, and we'll let you know when they're ready."

We all quietly took our seats. Emmett was twitchy, fidgeting with his jacket, his watch, his phone, only to snatch up a magazine and toss it back down to the coffee table. I gazed around, my fingers reaching for Bella almost blindly. She slipped her hand into mine without a word.

It was strange being back at Serenity…at least on the other side of things. Although I wasn't sure what to expect on family day, if only because I'd never allowed anyone to come see me. I'd decided before I even went in that I'd do the stretch in rehab alone. I didn't want my bandmates, my brother, or my parents to see me in here. I'd been resigned to get through it, but I wasn't sure exactly how things would be in here. As the month had worn on, my time in here became a bit of a respite, a vacation from the outside world.

A warm hand pressed softly to the side of my face, and I turned to see Bella watching me warily. "You okay?"

Nodding, I gazed around the place again. "It's weird being back."

Rose huffed a light laugh. "I bet. Nice place, though."

"Oh, yeah," I agreed with a nod as I sat forward, resting my elbows on my knees. "It's not bad. The food was okay, the staff is pretty cool as long as you follow the rules, and the doctors actually give a shit. I can't imagine what the state rehab would've been like."

"Jail," Bella said softly, wrinkling her nose a little.

"Your dad's friend?"

"Uncle Sam. Yeah." She nodded. "He was forced into rehab once, but he… Well, you know."

Nodding, I reached over to tuck her hair behind her ear and kiss her temple. She'd been my fucking rock the last few days – hell, since I'd met her. But with the concert at Charlie's, the drama with Heidi, my mother, and now visiting my dad, she was solidly just…there. She didn't say much, and she only encouraged me that things would be okay, even though no one knew for sure how shit would go down. It didn't matter. When Bella said it, I wanted so fucking badly to believe it.

When we left the country club the day before after the most exhausting and trying conversation with my mother, Bella had been quiet, but she'd held my hand through it all, even the drive home. And pushed me down onto the sofa, ordered a pizza to be delivered, because she knew I'd be hungry once the shock wore off, and then she let me do wicked and desperate things to her before the delivery guy arrived. The whole time, despite how naked and sweaty we were, her repeated words of love were all I could truly focus on.

Swallowing nervously, I glanced up when the waiting-room door opened.

"Cullen?" a nurse I knew as Ron called. His grin was wide when he caught sight of me. "Well, shit fire and save matches…Masen!"

"Ron," I greeted, and he pulled me into a one-armed hug. "Still flirting with the girl in the pharmacy?"

"Hells yes!" He laughed, slapping my shoulder. "Almost got her convinced that I'm a halfway decent guy."

"Poor girl. Little does she know…"

"Indeed. C'mon, man, I'm here to take you back."

I turned to reach for Bella, who really hadn't moved from the chairs. She and Rose were hanging back a little.

"Nah, get your asses over here," Emmett called jokingly, but his face was serious. "Both of you."

Bella locked eyes with me, and I could see she wasn't sure, so I walked to her, speaking softly. "C'mon, angel. Please? I'd like to think we're a package deal now."

"I'm not family, Edward." Her argument, while valid, was given weakly.

"You are now," Emmett urged. "If you survived the country club with Esme Cullen, you can most certainly handle this shit."

Bella smirked, huffing a light laugh, but it was Rose who helped me out. She walked to Bella, looping their arms.

"He'll want to see us anyway, Bella, so we might as well suck it up."

Ron waited patiently, and when we all turned, he nodded, holding the door open. "Right this way, guys. Masen, you didn't really participate with family day, so this is how it'll go. You'll sit with Dr. Cope and your father for a short session, and then you'll be released to walk about the grounds. You won't pass anything to Dr. Cullen, nor is he allowed to give you anything. Ladies, you'll leave your purses in the lockers here. Guys, empty your pockets."

Phones, keys, wallets, and purses were all set inside a small locker, and Ron padlocked it, handing the key to me. We followed him the rest of the way down a hall, where I recognized the therapy rooms.

Dr. Cope was a nice older woman, with graying hair and hazel eyes that crinkled when she smiled. She'd been my favorite therapist when I'd been locked in here, and I'd hoped that if anyone could help my dad, it would've been her. She had more patience with me than I'd expected, even on the days I had nothing to say.

Her office was warm, neutral colors – tans, browns, and creams – and she was already in there with Dad. She stood up from behind her desk to walk to me.

"Masen," she greeted, holding out her hand to shake it. "It's good to see you. You look well."

"I'm good, Dr. Cope," I said with a smile but turned toward the people with me. "This is my brother, Emmett, and his wife, Rose. And this is my girlfriend, Bella."

That caught the good doctor's attention, because the last session we'd had I'd talked about Heidi's betrayal and how it had been inevitable. I'd admitted to her that I'd had suspicions about Heidi's infidelity, that the relationship was probably doomed from the get-go, and that I'd never truly been in love with her. I'd cared about her, but nothing came even close to what I felt for the girl I'd just introduced.

I'd also had a feeling that Dr. Cope knew I didn't need to actually be in Serenity, but neither of us had ever discussed it.

"It's nice to meet all of you," she said, gesturing toward her sitting area. "We can get started. This is just an informal session. It gives all of you a chance to ask questions, talk over some things, or simply listen."

Dad looked…like shit. Though, he was most likely still detoxing from all the alcohol. He rarely went a day without shaving, but there had to be at least three or four day's growth on his face. His hair was messy, and he was wearing the scrubs-type clothes the patients had to wear. However, it was the heartbreaking expression on his face when he did a mental count of who was with us…and who wasn't.

He locked his gaze on me, and I simply said, "Mom needs…time, Dad."

Nodding, he shot a glance to Dr. Cope but didn't say anything.

"Carlisle, it was expected, and it doesn't mean you have to give up hope. It simply means you've work ahead of you. Your actions caused a chain of events that you now have to untangle." The doc's words and tone were calm but true. Her next words were addressed to everyone. "Guys, take a seat, and we'll get started. Carlisle thought you'd like to hear the things we've been doing, the progress…and setbacks we've made, and he's given me permission to discuss some issues with you."

If my dad was surprised to see Bella, he made no mention of it. We all took seats on the sofas and chairs across from the doctor.

Dr. Cope started the session, telling us how dad's detoxing was going, that he'd been put on an anti-depression medication that seemed to be working for him, and he'd started his twelve-step process. She explained that they'd decided to start at the beginning, when his drinking had started – which had been way back in college – in order to figure out when it had become a problem.

Dad sat pretty stoic throughout most of it, as did Bella and Rose. Emmett asked a question here or there – mainly about the meds Dad was on, and would they be a problem. The answer was no. When the half hour was just about up, Dr. Cope addressed me specifically.

"You've been awful quiet, Masen," she stated, neither questioning, nor accusing.

I snorted, shaking my head. "What's there to say, doc? Seriously? He's either gonna do this shit or he isn't. But saying that out loud isn't gonna change anything. I want to believe he's trying, that this shit is for real, but he's made promises and bargains with me before."

I raised an eyebrow toward my dad, who nodded solemnly. There was no need to drudge up the wreck or my time here. Dad knew what the fuck I was talking about.

"Masen, does your anger stem from those broken promises? Or does it come from someplace else? Your career choice has always caused a rift between you…"

I laughed humorlessly, sitting back and folding my arms across my chest. "Yeah, maybe," I admitted belligerently. "Nothing I did was good enough. I didn't pick the right career for Dr. Cullen."

"That's not true, champ," Dad argued softly.

I glared at the floor at the old nickname coming from him. It made me feel like a fucking kid, that same skinny, fucking kid who was told I couldn't have a band, who was told I'd never make anything of that "useless rock music." Never mind the fact that I'd just cut my third album, or that my band had won countless awards, or the millions of fans…yeah, useless, my ass.

A warm hand tugged gently at my arms until she found my hand, and Bella pulled it to her lap, not saying a damn word. She just…was. I threaded my fingers with hers, squeezing softly in thanks to her being there.

"Coulda fucking fooled me," I mumbled, shooting a glare at the doc. "I've been here, done this. Shouldn't we focus on him now?"

Dr. Cope grinned at my sour mood like she'd always done, shaking her head. "It's all relevant, Masen."

I pursed my lips at her, but my dad sat forward.

"It wasn't that your mother and I disliked your career choice, Edward. Either of you," he said, giving Emmett a pointed look. "It's just…we _knew_ it wouldn't be easy, that you could get yourselves wrapped up in bad contracts, scary situations, or even face awful rejections. We never wanted you hurt. Our mistake was thinking our boys weren't smart enough or strong enough to handle whatever _anyone_ threw their way. And for that, I'm sorry, because clearly you've surpassed all of those concerns." He placed a hand over his heart. "We discouraged you in order to keep you safe, keep you from getting hurt, when really, we should've been your biggest support. We should've realized that we'd raised two very smart, strong, talented boys who could rule the world should they set their minds to it."

Emmett snorted, shaking his head. "I fucking _love_ what I do. I have no regrets in following my brother. Not one." The usual jovial guy had left the room. He was so serious, it was scary. "I've traveled the damn world, I get to work every fucking day with my wife, and I get to see some of the best of the best in the music industry. And I do what I've always done, which is protect my kid brother from the fucking bullies of the world. There's nothin' better than that."

A soft laugh escaped the girls at that declaration, and I shot a quick smile Bella's way. She looked like she was about a second from jumping out of her seat on that sofa just to give Emmett a hug.

"Told you, angel… I was a skinny little fuck," I teased her.

She giggled but shook her head when Emmett laughed, saying, "He's not kidding, Bella."

Leave it to my big brother to lighten the room, even when he was being serious.

"I have so much to make up for," Dad sighed, sitting back in his seat. "Right now, it's all I can do not to hunt down the closest bar."

"Which is normal, Carlisle," Dr. Cope told him. "One day…even one hour at a time is a victory."

He nodded, his face dark with worry and frustration and just plain old stress. And suddenly I felt sorry for him. It was bigger than the sympathy I'd had the night of the wreck, the night I took the fall for his mistake. Then, I'd just wanted to protect him and my mother, but now I was truly seeing his struggle. It was real and in my face, and I wasn't a stranger to this struggle. I'd seen my fellow rehab patients go through hell and back with their addictions and family problems.

Gone was the man who had taught Emmett and me how to throw a baseball and football, the guy who'd taught us how to ride bikes, and the guy who would let us stay up all night when Mom was away visiting family. He was the same guy who wrestled with Emmett, who told me at fourteen that my piano lessons weren't needed anymore because I was better than my instructor. That guy – to us – hung the damn moon. But he was gone. In front of me was the mortal man, a vulnerable man who was barely keeping his head above the shit that surrounded him, even if it was the shit in his own head. I knew from listening to others what it felt like to have your own mind betray you.

Turning to Dr. Cope, I asked, "Are we done here?"

"Yes, our time is up."

Spinning my gaze back to Dad, I asked, "Why don't we check out the grounds? Hmm?"

Dad's eyes widened, but he nodded and stood up. "Sure."

We let him take the lead, winding us through the halls to the back doors that led out to the grounds. The place was kind of pretty, with hedges and fountains and concrete patios. Due to the weather, some heaters had been set up, along with some fire pits. I'd spent my time there in the summer, so I was a little surprised at the difference.

"Edward," Bella said softly, tugging my hand just as we opened the door. "I'll meet you out there in a minute. I need the restroom."

"I'll come with you," Rose offered.

Leaning down, I dropped a brief kiss to Bella's lips, and then the girls disappeared around the corner. I hesitated leaving the building, but Emmett slapped my shoulder gently, urging me out the door.

Some families were taking advantage of the chilly yet clear, sunny day. There was a specific spot I was aiming for, and I was glad it was vacant of people. Along a pathway, there were a few benches set up on a small hill. We weren't far from the building, but we were away from prying ears. We each took a bench, sitting down to wait for the girls.

"You love her," Dad suddenly said, and I smiled in spite of everything.

Nodding, I sighed deeply. "Yeah, I do."

"She calls you Edward, I see."

I nodded again, sitting forward to rest my elbows on my knees.

Emmett laughed softly. "I'm pretty sure he'd let Bella call him just about anything and she'd get away with it."

I chuckled. "Yeah, probably."

"Good. I'm happy for you, son. She's…really good for you," Dad stated, almost in awe. "Is she… Will she be okay when you leave? Or is she going with you?"

"No, she's not coming with us." I shook my head, raking my hand through my hair. "She's got her own life to live here, but…she _seems_ okay with everything. I mean, her dad used to tour, so she's not naïve as to how it works. I just…" I frowned down at the ground, not knowing what to say when it came to my leaving and Bella.

"When do you leave?" Dad asked.

"Nine days," Emmett replied. "And we won't be back for the holidays, Dad. That's why we came today. We wanted to see you."

Dad smiled, glancing between us. "That means the world, boys, you have no idea. I don't want you worried about me when you're gone. Can you promise me that?"

"Yeah…no, probably not," my brother said with a chuckle. "We're gonna worry. You and Mom…"

Dad smiled but held up a hand. "I've destroyed your mother's trust in me. I've done the same to you boys. I obviously can't discuss the disaster of that car wreck with anyone here, but I'm well aware of how disgustingly low, how cowardly, and how despicable it was of me to allow you three to cover for me that night. I'm… The guilt and remorse I feel is overwhelming. I tried my damnedest to protect the two of you from the dangers of the music business, yet I'd ask you to go to jail for me? What kind of father does that?!"

"A drunk and desperate one," I answered honestly. "You weren't…you." I shrugged a shoulder. "And we're just as guilty, you know. We could've just…held your hand through it all and suffered Mom's reaction, your arrest, and…the possible loss of your medical license. Not facing it all probably made it fucking worse, but…what the hell do I know?"

Dad chuckled a little, but it died quickly. "You know a lot, champ. I'm not stupid, though. I know your mother is pissed at me. I know she may leave me. And rightfully so. But…I'm not leaving this place until I know I can fix all the shit I've broken throughout the years. Unfortunately, that starts with me."

I grinned at his scowl, but at least he knew what he had to do.

"Your mother, however, will be a long road."

My gaze drifted to the sloping lawn that was turning brown with the cold weather. I had a feeling winter would be a rough one. The girls were making their way toward us, and they couldn't be any more different if they'd tried. Rosalie was tall, with her striking features and blonde hair. Bella was petite, several inches shorter, with natural beauty and gorgeous dark hair. Both were bundled in their jackets, and they were chatting away as they got closer.

"Imma lose my motherfucking mind on this goddamn tour," I muttered, shaking my head at Emmett's and Dad's laughter. "I didn't mean to say that shit out loud."

"Edward," Dad said through his amusement. "She seems like a very strong girl…"

"Oh, God, she is," I sighed, shrugging a shoulder. "It's me. _Me_." I pointed to myself. "I've never, ever felt selfish about my job…until now. I just found her. I just… I don't know… So many things could happen…"

"Edward…son, if I may…" Dad said, sitting forward. "I'd be happy to check on her once I'm out of here. It's…the _very least_ I could do."

My eyebrows shot up at that, but Bella and Rose joined us, and I held my arms open for my girl, smiling when she walked straight into them.

"What'd we miss?" Rose asked shrewdly.

My gaze landed on Bella as I pulled her to my lap. "We were discussing the tour. And Dad here offered to check on Bella while we're gone…"

"Once he's out of here, of course," Emmett added with a laugh.

Bella smiled so sweetly that I probably tumbled head over heels in love her all over again, and she turned to my dad. "I'd like that. Just let me know, and I'll make sure to brew the coffee."

Dad grinned at that, nodding a little. "Yes, ma'am. I'd like that, too."

Pressing a kiss to her cheek, I squeezed her closer. "Smart girl," I whispered in her ear. "Hide the vodka."

Bella fought her giggle until my dad cracked up.

"I heard that!" Dad laughed, shaking his head. "God, I'm gonna miss you guys."

"We're a phone call away," Emmett said, shrugging a shoulder. "If… If shit goes bad with Mom, just…call. Hell, you've earned a leave from the hospital, so fuck it…you can come out on the tour."

"Oh, yeah, brilliant idea, Em," Rose drawled, rolling her eyes. "Let's bring the recovering addict on a rock-band tour."

"We're not _that_ bad," I argued, grinning at Bella's giggle. "Damn, most of that shit is a fucking illusion, anyway."

"True that," Emmett agreed. "We'll just keep him away from the road crew. They're some partying animals."

Dad grinned. "We'll see."

I could see just from this interaction that things would be different with him. Seeing him truly sober for the first time in who knew how long was strange but easy. I'd forgotten just how much we'd teased and joked with each other before. I wondered if he'd missed it, and I wondered if not having it when he was struggling the most would harm him.

Warm breath pushed out against my ear, and Bella pressed a kiss to my jaw. "You know, I can check on him, too."

She tilted her head at me when I pulled back to look her in the eye. I trailed the backs of my fingers down her face, tapping beneath her chin lightly.

"That's completely up to you, angel," I told her softly. "But very sweet."

"I'd do it for _you_," she whispered, shrugging a shoulder. "I know you'll be worried."

"Not just about him, but I'm… Yeah, I can't with this right now, Bella."

I wasn't ready to face leaving her. I knew I had to, but I wanted to soak up as much of Bella as she'd allow me to have over the next nine days. The tour scared the shit out of me, if only because we were so new, because she'd possibly see stuff that would test her faith in me, and she'd be alone. Fuck, _I'd_ be alone. And I hated it.

"Okay, shhh," she breathed against my cheek. "Later."

We stayed out on the benches for a few more minutes, until the girls started to get cold. We talked about the tour, the concert we'd filmed at Bella's bar, and general chatter. When it came time to leave, Dad hugged every last one of us.

"Thank you," he said, shoving his hands into his pockets once he'd walked us back to the main building. "Just seeing you… It means everything. I want you three to be careful when you're gone. And Bella, you're welcome anytime. And I'm gonna take you up on that coffee when I'm done here."

She smiled and nodded. "I look forward to it."

I felt better when we left him in the hallway to gather our things out of the locker. Something about his demeanor, his sense of just…self, seemed real. If I'd had to guess, it was most likely the loss of Mom that kicked his ass this time. Perhaps the threat of losing her was his "rock bottom." As I slid into the backseat of Rose's car, I pulled Bella close, because I could truly fucking understand that.

**~oOo~**

The apartment was quiet. Too quiet, really. The only sounds heard were the ticking of the clock in my kitchen and the sweet, soft sounds of Bella's breathing. I wanted to freeze time. Right there and at that moment, because my sweet girl shifted, rolling over to drape a bare leg across mine. Her arm blindly reached and fumbled for me, finally wrapping around my waist as I sat up against the headboard of my bed.

I tapped my phone it in order to see the time. I'd be gone in less than forty-eight hours. Two fucking days. Just like I'd thought, time had flown since our visit to Dad at Serenity. And even though Bella worked shorter or fewer shifts, it wasn't enough. I wanted more of her. Just…more. More time, more dinners, more late-night talks and laughter in the darkness of my apartment, and more skin and kisses and touches. And I wanted to memorize everything about her – her smile, her kiss, her sweet laughter, and fuck, the sound she made when my name fell from her lips. Jesus, that was the best sound, because she usually followed it up with, "I love you."

Slipping down into the bed, I rolled to face her, keeping her close. Reaching up, I barely touched her in order to brush the hair out of her face. As I watched her sleep, I wondered for a moment how Alec did it. Hell, how Jacob even did it. They'd leave their girls behind and travel for months. Though, Alec's wife would join us on the road occasionally. But she was having a baby, which would be due most likely when we were on the second leg of the tour. We were all aware of it, including Rose and Marcus. Should Carrie go into labor, we'd bring in a temporary keyboardist until he could come back. He was excited, and Carrie was a level-headed thing, so she handled Alec's absence just fine. But me… Fuck, I couldn't even fathom leaving Bella should she have been…

"Shit," I barely uttered aloud, pressing my lips to Bella's forehead. The mere thought of Bella pregnant… Oh my fucking hell, I wanted it, but I wanted it when it was right. I hoped that could be our future. As I gazed through the shadows of the room at the prettiest thing I'd ever seen, I could almost see that future, but it seemed so damned fragile.

Before I could wake the poor thing at five o'clock in the damn morning and scare the shit out of her by talking about babies, I slid carefully from the bed, tucking the covers up around her. I pulled on my jeans and a hoodie and slipped my feet into some sneakers. My black acoustic guitar stood by the door, and I picked it up, stepping out onto the landing.

There was a small spiral notebook with a pencil shoved in it on the little table by the door, and I snatched that up, too. There were words and notes I wanted to get down. The melody Jasper had written, the one he'd said he wouldn't let Aro have, swirled in my head, and words started to mesh with those notes.

Jasper had always seen the music first, but the words usually came from me. I'd work it, rework it, and then show him what I'd done with it. We'd clean it up together, polish it, and then present it to the rest of the boys. From there it became a song.

It seemed his new melody was no different, except the words were all mine. They would be personal this time, and they were coming from a place I'd never felt before.

I was tweaking the notes on my guitar when warm arms wrapped around me from behind. Dark hair draped over my shoulder, and I smiled at the sleepy-sweet thing that pressed kisses to my jaw and cheek.

"I woke you," I guessed.

"Not with this but when you left the bed," she whispered, smiling when I pulled her down onto my lap and I sandwiched her with my guitar.

"Sorry," I breathed against her skin, playing the notes blindly as I inhaled the clean smell of her hair.

"That's pretty. What's the words?" she asked, picking up the notebook, but I laughed and took it back. "Edward!" she whined. "I wanna see!"

"And I want you to wait, angel. It's not done."

She pouted adorably, and I kissed her until she melted in my arms. "Please?" she begged against my lips.

"I promise you…you'll hear it when it's done. It's…important, Bella."

She sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes and muttering, "Temperamental artist."

Grinning, I set the guitar aside. "I can show you temperamental…" My fingers gripped her sides, and her squeak and laugh echoed down into the alleyway.

"Edward! Okay, okay, okay!" she begged, fighting me and finally sagging in my arms when I relented.

Pushing her hair away from her face, I said, "I love you. You know that, right? You know this isn't just…for now. Please…_please_, angel…tell me you know that."

Her expression was heartbreakingly sweet and concerned and sad all at once, and I dropped a kiss to her lips, silently urging her to answer me without saying the words.

A small smile curled her beautiful lips. "I know Edward loves me. Masen may be on the fence."

Chuckling, I shook my head. "They're both so very fucking stupid over you, Bella. Shut up."

She laughed softly, pressing kisses to my lips. "I love you, too. And I know you're out here 'cause you can't sleep."

Nodding, I looked down at where our fingers were entwined.

She was quiet for a moment but then lifted our hands beneath my chin to tilt my gaze to hers. "I took the next two days off, you know."

I shook my head. "No, I didn't know."

"Yeah, see… My boyfriend is kidnapping my baby brother for the next few months, so I thought…maybe I needed to take off for it."

Swallowing nervously, I reached up with my free hand and threaded my fingers into the hair at the base of her neck in order to bring her forehead to mine.

"I _will_ watch over him, baby. I swear to God." My eyes closed when I pressed kisses to her lips.

"I know you will. I know the other guys will, too. Emmett already promised me." When I opened my eyes again, she smiled sadly. "Now…we have to talk about this. You've avoided it long enough."

I turned my head. "I… I'm sorry. I know we do. I just…" I let out a deep breath, and suddenly all my fears came rushing out of me. "I… I feel so fucking selfish for leaving. I want so fucking much for us, but it's all getting snatched away too early. For the first time, I'll hate touring. I'll worry about leaving you alone, about whatever shit you'll see on TV, about the paps and the fans and…"

"Edward, baby…stop," she pleaded, grasping either side of my face. "It's your _job_." She raised a dangerous eyebrow at me until I nodded. "That's not selfish; that's fulfilling your responsibilities. And you can't tell me you'll hate it, because on that stage…you're free. You're doing what you were born to do, so…it's only right that you go do it. And do it like you always do it…amazingly well." She took a deep breath. "As far as the media and paps go… I don't know, Edward. I never paid them much attention before, but I'm sure there will be things I'll hate seeing. I just… I have to trust you, just like you have to trust leaving me here."

"Can you come? Not for a long period, but maybe a weekend?" I asked her, though it sounded like begging.

"I'd already planned it, but I'm not sure when, so let me figure that out. Okay?"

I nodded, feeling a bit relieved at knowing I might see her before the first leg of the tour was done. We were quiet for a moment. Bella's head fell to my shoulder, and I was ridiculously content simply holding her right there.

"Angel, why would you say Masen's on the fence?"

She giggled. "I was teasing you, Edward. You've only ever been Edward to me, even from the beginning, so I was just playing." She lifted her head, reaching up to rake her fingers through my hair. "We've been lucky, I think. No paps have followed you here, even after the filming. No one knew you actually lived here. You've been able to stay clear of it all. I'm glad. I'm glad I could give that to you."

Smiling a little, I nuzzled her nose with mine. My phone bleeped on the step next to me, and I saw that Rose was already up and working. Her text made a hissed string of curses leave my lips.

"What?" Bella asked.

"New rumor," I sighed, shaking my head. "Apparently Aro leaked word out that Heidi was at the filming of the video, and now we're supposedly back together." I snorted at the absurdity of it all…and the timing, since we were just about to leave.

"Ooh, Lord, if they'd only seen your face that day," Bella teased with a laugh, and I couldn't help but grin. "You know, there's only one way to squash a rumor."

Studying her face, I tilted my head. "Start a different one?"

"Mmhm," she hummed, leaning in to kiss me. "But in order to do that, you'd…_we_ would have to go public."

"No, baby," I argued, shaking my head. "I never wanted that for you! No, I can't. I can't do that to you when you've got such a peaceful thing here. And you hate them… I never, ever—"

She shut me up by kissing me. Hard. And then it turned deep and heated, and suddenly my hands started to move on their own. Fuck it all if she didn't have me hard in an instant. She pulled away just as I had one hand cupping her breast underneath her sweatshirt, while the other palmed her ass without shame. I groaned and panted as I glared up at her for stopping.

"Edward, listen to me," she urged, smiling when I squeezed her ass cheek. "When I say I love you, I mean I love every part of you, and that means… Eventually, the world will know. Yeah, sure, I hate them, but I'm beginning to hate Aro more. _You_ should control what _you_ do. Rock-star image or not, you should make the decision. Unless you don't want people to know…"

"Oh hell no!" I practically growled against her mouth. "I want everyone to know, the whole fucking world, but I was worried about your privacy, angel. I'd put it in skywriting if I thought I could get away with it."

Her smile lit up the damn world, and I kissed her softly.

"You're sure?"

"Yes."

Swallowing thickly, I studied her face but didn't relent just yet.

"It's Saturday, Edward," she purred against my mouth. "It'll be a clear day. There's fun stuff to do in town, and a friend of my dad's is playing at a place on the water tonight."

All day. I'd have Bella to myself all damn day, and we could go do normal couple shit.

"Yes," she answered with a giggle. "Was 'normal couple shit' something that interested you?"

"Dammit, I said that out loud." I shook my head at her sweet laugh. "Yeah, very interested. We could get some stuff done before I left, too. And…prove to Aro that rumor or not…he can't manipulate me." I took a deep breath but locked gazes with her. "If we do this, there's no going back. They may follow you, even…or _especially_ while I'm away. I don't want you hurt, baby, so you gotta be sure. I can live with a fucking rumor that isn't true, but I can't bear the thought of anything hurting you."

"I love you, Edward. Every part." Her answer was simple and honest. "I knew what I was getting into the minute I made you hide behind my bar."

Grinning, I nodded. "Okay, then. We'll start now. Go get dressed, and we'll get breakfast…out."

Her face was stunningly happy, and I couldn't help but chuckle at her.

"You want this? Really?" I couldn't help but ask again.

She shifted in my arms, straddling my lap and facing me fully. Her smile was sad and her eyes warm as she trailed her fingers down my face. "I know you're worried, Edward. I know Heidi screwed you over when you toured the last time. And I know this is…new. Us. I also know you've got so much riding on this tour. Not only is it possibly the last one underneath Aro and all his bullshit, but there's the worry over your parents, too. I know you'll be stressed out and busy and tired. I know you love me…both of you," she said with a grin when I chuckled at her. "I just…I want to be one less worry for you, Edward. I'm… I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here missing you until you come back – whether I come for a visit or not. And if telling the world I'm yours somehow makes one of those things easier, then…I'm in."

I gaped up at her, and my words stuck in my throat. "Jesus, Bella… How the hell… When did I… I'm one lucky bastard."

Giggling, she grabbed my face and kissed my lips. "No, I just… I just… I remember my dad leaving for weeks or months at a time, and I remember our talks on the phone, no matter what age I was, and he worried. All the time. Jesus, Edward, you have enough going on in your life without me being an issue."

Laughing softly, I wrapped my arms around her. "_You_, my angel, are not an 'issue.'"

"I'm glad. Now…let's go…have some fun before you go."

Grinning, I held her close, standing up with her wrapped around me. "I tried to tell ya, Bella. Masen's the fun one. Edward is fucking boring."

She nuzzled into my neck, dropping ridiculously enticing kisses to my skin, but her chuckle was adorable. "I call bullshit, Edward. And I want waffles."

Shaking my head at just how amazing this girl was, I toted her and my guitar back inside, saying, "Then my girl gets waffles."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… I'm with Bella; I really hate Aro. LOL Which is saying something, considering how little I've shown him. Carlisle seems to be trying, the band is getting ready to leave, and Edward and Bella are bracing themselves for public and his tour and all the shit that goes with it.**

**QUESTION… A few were concerned over Esme's situation, over Edward thinking that his mother believed everything. She did, if only because her husband told her that it was all Edward's doing. Their conversation cleared that up.**

**Okay…the playlist and pic teases are in their usual spots. The next update is Wednesday. So until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	16. Circus Life

**A/N… So…everyone wants waffles with Edward…whether it was a euphemism or not. LOL Some of you are excited about going public, and others are worried. Each side is understandable. I'll let you get to it. See me at the bottom where I answer a question or two…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 16 – Circus Life**

_Circus life  
Under the big top world  
We all need the clowns  
To make us smile  
Through space and time  
Always another show  
Wondering where I am  
Lost without you_

_And being apart_  
_Ain't easy on this love affair_  
_Two strangers learn to fall in love again_  
_I get the joy of rediscovering you_  
_Oh, girl, you stand by me_  
_I'm forever yours_  
_Faithfully_

"_Faithfully" – Journey_

**EDWARD**

I shut off the car, gazing around me, and started to laugh. "I can't believe we're doing this, Bella."

She giggled, leaning over to kiss my cheek. "It's now or never."

Groaning, I let my head fall back to the headrest, only to roll to my right to look her in the eyes. "Funny that Rose agreed with you."

Bella shrugged a shoulder. "Rose seems to be rather mischievous when she needs to be, but…baby, this'll be fun. And perhaps no one will notice you."

Snorting, I raised an eyebrow at her. "Seriously?"

"Okay, well…just saying," she sighed, but her smile was too cute. "Plus," she added in a dramatic little whine, poking my side, "you promised to help me! I want to make sure Mike has everything he needs for this tour. I mean, I know Mom got him luggage and stuff, but _you_ know how this will work, so I want that to be a gift from me."

My heart melted at that, simply because that was kind of cool of her as a big sister, and I gazed around Pike Place Market. It was touristy and big and full of people on a late Saturday morning. Breakfast had been reasonably quiet with Bella. No big deal. Our waitress had been a fan, but a quick selfie on her phone and a few autographs on the way out were all that came of it. And Bella had gotten her waffles. A happy Bella was an adorable Bella, but Bella on syrup was a hyper little ball of energy, and it was all I could do not to eat her up…or take her home to see just how long that energy would last. Not that I hadn't tested that theory _before_ we'd left my apartment.

That thought made me grin evilly her way, especially when she narrowed her eyes at me.

"Okay, okay. You're right. I promised you at breakfast I'd help you get Mike some stuff he'll need."

The conversation had started when I'd mentioned needing a few things before I packed. She'd asked me lots of questions. When she realized all of this would be new to her brother, she wanted to help him.

I sat up straight, reaching for the car door, but stopped and turned to her. "Angel, listen to me for a second, okay?" When she nodded, I got serious for a moment. "I don't give a fuck about what these people think, especially about you and me. You need to know that now. But crowds can sometimes mean trouble, so I want you close to me at all times. If word spreads in this place, then the crowd could get pushy. All joking aside about being in public, Bella… Paps, media, fans…they can go fuck themselves, really. I don't care about squashing any fucking rumor if it means you get wrapped up in bullshit. Just…stay close and hold my hand. That alone will tell people I'm yours. Can you do that for me?"

Bella glanced nervously from my face toward the market entrance and back again. She nodded with wide eyes and a soft: "Yeah, I can do that."

"Okay, good."

Getting out of the car, I walked around to take her hand and then set the alarm. The day was overcast and cold, and being the first weekend of November, it wouldn't shock me if snow didn't start soon. We were both in jeans and leather jackets, and even though it was overcast, I wore sunglasses and a black baseball cap, just to hide my face a little, though I knew it wouldn't work once we were inside.

The place was crowded, but true to her word, Bella stayed by my side. I caught whispers and stares, not to mention a phone or two taking pictures, but otherwise we were left alone for the first few stores.

Bella stocked her brother up on things no one thinks about – underwear, cologne, socks, and an electric shaver. And even though I told her that anyone would get him anything he needed, she just wanted to spoil him, which was extremely thoughtful and sweet.

I caught sight of an electronics store and stopped her. "Hey, baby? He's gonna want…" I grinned, shaking my head. "It can get really fucking boring on tour buses or long flights, so… I mean, if he plays video games or something…" I pointed to the store.

Bella smiled, and we went on in. I stepped back a little, just observing her as she looked around. God, she was beautiful and completely oblivious when the poor sales guy practically tripped over his own two feet to get to her. If she heard the poor boy's voice crack, she showed no reaction.

A salesgirl approached me eventually, gaping up at me.

"Oh… I know you," she squeaked. "Are you… Can I help you find something?"

"Nah, but thank you," I said with a smile. "I'm with her." I pointed toward Bella, who seemed to be considering a tablet for Mike, and suddenly an idea hit me. "Excuse me…" I muttered, leaving the salesgirl behind and walking to Bella.

The poor boy could barely keep his eyes in his head, not that I could blame him – her jeans fit like sin and her boots made me crazy. Though, his eyes lingered just a little too long on her chest for my liking, so I stepped up close to her.

"Can you give us a second…Corey?" I asked, barely getting it out without growling through gritted teeth when I saw his nametag.

Poor Corey knew exactly who I was when he tore his eyes away from Bella to my face. He paled for a moment and then nodded, walking away.

"Edward," Bella hissed, turning to face me. "What are you…?"

"I'm surprised he can walk," I murmured, my eyes narrowing on the kid, but I relaxed at the sound of her soft laugh. "Sorry. He was… Never mind… Look, angel, I was wondering," I started, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. "What do you think… How do you feel about…video chatting?"

Bella's eyes widened, but her smile curled up her sweet lips. "For us?"

"I… Yeah, I mean… Fuck, I'll just wanna _see_ you, you know? I mean, we could both…get one of these things and… You know…"

Bella was quiet, and she looked to the display of tablets before nodding. "Yeah, that would be…" She took a shaky breath. "Dammit, I wasn't…"

I realized quickly that she was tearing up, and I turned her face to mine. "Don't. Not yet, baby. I can't take tears today. I'll buy you this whole fucking market to keep you from shedding one fucking tear. Today is supposed to be fun, remember?" I whispered my rant low enough for just her ears. Fuck, it was going to be hard enough to leave her without seeing those big brown eyes filled with tears.

She let out a long breath but smiled up at me for my silly statement. "I'm sorry. I'm just gonna miss you."

"Please," I begged her because I didn't know if I could take it, especially in public. "I'll buy the tablets. Just…hold it together just a little longer, angel."

"I can—"

"Let me, Bella. For me…_for us_." She finally relented with a nod, and I pulled her to me in a hug, whispering in her ear. "I think you've done enough for Mike, and if he needs anything, I'll make sure to move heaven and earth so he gets it, but I'm ready to get out of here. You still wanna see that friend of your dad's perform tonight?" When she nodded, I asked, "What do you say we call everyone to meet up there? We'll take this stuff home, and you can see your brother. We'll just enjoy the night with friends. We usually get together in town before we leave home, so it kinda works. Hmm?"

She nodded again, gripping my shirt inside my jacket. "Love you."

"Damn, baby…I love you, too. Let's get these things and go," I said, pulling back to look at her. "Besides, think of all the dirty things we can do on them."

Her laugh barked out of her, and she shook her head. "Sure…_Masen_."

I gasped dramatically at her tease but kept my arm wrapped around her shoulders when I waved poor, scared Corey back over. "We need three of these, please."

**~oOo~**

Slammers was right on the bay, which made the breeze coming off the water bitingly cold. In the warmer weather, bands played outside. In fact, Radiant Eclipse had played here a time or two in the past – both inside and out.

Bella and I had been quiet for most of the ride, simply because I'd had no choice but to start packing when we'd gotten back from Pike Place Market. Having her help was fun but painful, because now every fucking time I'd open my suitcase, I'd see every single touch and every bit of care she'd put into it. Bella was much neater than I was when it came to arranging things.

I parked the car, turning to Bella. "What's this guy's name?"

"Harry… Harry Clearwater. Blues harmonica and some guitar, but his voice is killer," she said, grinning my way. "He's in his late sixties, and he can still play all night."

Chuckling a little, I nodded and got out of the car. We walked into the place, noise and music and laughter meeting our ears. The place was busy, but I could see everyone we knew was already gathered around a couple of tables pushed together.

Rose was the first to see us, and she walked to us holding up her phone. "Did you set this shit up?"

She sounded pissed, but I grabbed her phone to pull the picture closer. My laugh barked out of me, and I looked over to Bella, who was peering around my arm to see.

It was the electronics store. Fuck, I couldn't have staged it better. I was hugging Bella, clearly smiling as I whispered in her ear. The next picture was the two of us talking, eye to eye, flirty smiles, but how we felt for each other was written all over our faces. She owned me, and it was clearly visible in every picture.

"This shit's gone viral, Edward!" Rose hissed. "Is that what you wanted? I thought you'd just be _seen_, not go global!"

Ignoring her rant, I turned to Bella. "Bet this was your buddy, Corey."

"Nah, the salesgirl who was drooling over you," Bella argued but pointed to one of the pictures. "See…Corey is there."

"Oh yeah," I sang, nodding a little. "Good call, baby. Think he's walking straight yet?"

"Um, don't care." I laughed at her eye roll and sing-song tone.

We faced Rose, who was watching us with a perplexed expression. I could see she couldn't decide whether to be amused or concerned.

"Relax. No, we didn't plan it. Not _that_ way anyway. We had shit to do, Rose," I explained, shrugging a shoulder. "I needed to start packing. _You_ said you were cool with it!"

"Well, whoever posted these started a shitstorm. They were shared and shared. Viral, I tell you," Rose stated with a sigh, shaking her head, but a smirk was curling her mouth. "There seems to be a great big divide in opinions, guys. Some want to think that you're back with Heidi, which would mean you're cheating here. Some think you're still broken up, and some see this and can read your face like a damn book. I don't care, but I wondered if you knew how fast this spread. Like fucking wildfire!"

"Is that… I mean, is that a bad thing?" Bella asked her, glancing up to me.

"Well, no…not really," Rose replied, shaking her head again. "I just know that Edward doesn't care for the paps, but this wasn't the paps. A fan started this, so…" She shrugged a shoulder. "However, Aro…" She held up a finger and laughed a little. "Aro can't decide whether to be pissed or happy. I think he stirred the pot with the Heidi thing just for impact. The video will be big, so having her not only in it but attached via rumor would only make it bigger. The fact that this went global was enormous – much bigger than he'd expected. It will also play into his favor. But he's mad that you're trying to negate the rumor he started."

I tsked, rolling my eyes. "I don't give a fuck anymore, Rose. I just don't. We're leaving day after tomorrow, and the tour will complete our contract. He's out. I'm done. The rest of the guys agree."

"And that's all fine and dandy, Edward, but Bella, is this… I mean, tell me he didn't put you up to this, because now you'll be hounded while we're gone. They figured out who you are, that you're the daughter of Chainsaw Charlie Swan, and that you two met at the bar where the show was filmed. Though, they don't know the whole story. But now they'll watch you, follow you, wonder about every damn person you're with, so…"

"No, no, he didn't. I'm okay. I promise," Bella vowed. "They can wonder all they want, but they can't trespass."

"True, but I'm going to put you in touch with that security firm before we fly out, okay?"

I turned to Bella as she nodded to Rose. "Maybe we shouldn't have…"

Bella shook her head and smiled. "I don't regret anything, Edward. It would've happened sooner or later. I'm just glad we sort of had control over it, you know?"

Nodding, I pressed a kiss to her forehead. "You're right, but I worry about—"

"Well, don't. You worry about enough as it is," she reminded me. "Eventually we'll be old news…just like your rehab, Edward, so I just have to ride it out. Besides, it's not like I go anywhere, especially once you're gone." She frowned at that but continued. "I work, I go home, and I shop for groceries. If they wanna watch that, they'll be bored to tears."

Grinning, I nodded, kissing her lips. I was done hiding…me. I didn't give a fuck about the salesgirl at the electronics store and her pictures. Hell, I kinda liked seeing the way Bella looked at me. I didn't care who was in the bar right at that moment, either. They could do whatever they wanted. As long as Bella was okay, then I was cool with it.

We started for the table, and we were welcomed with catcalls and teases over the pictures. Mike hugged his sister, and he laughed when she told him all the stuff she'd brought him.

"You didn't have to do that, B," he scolded her halfheartedly. "Mom's… Mom's kinda okay with it all now."

"What?! You're joking," Bella gasped.

"Nah, not at all. I owe Phil my life, though," he said with a laugh, shaking his head. "When he went over everything – you know, the contract, the year touring, even the tutor – he was…kinda awesome. He told her that now was the time for me to do this. He basically told her this was my college fund. But if I waited, then I may miss out on a huge opportunity, and he set up all sorts of accounts for me to make sure I'm not an idiot with money."

Chuckling, I gripped his shoulder. "That's important, Mike. Trust me."

Mike grinned, nodding my way. "Yeah, I know. I'm just glad she's finally okay with it."

"That's really good, Mike," Bella whispered. "Think he was doing it to keep her calm? Or happy that you'd be out of the house?" she teased him.

"Yes, no? Maybe both?" Mike laughed, shrugging a shoulder. "It doesn't matter. I'm just… I'm ready. I'm good. And I met my tutor. She's kinda hot!"

Bella snorted, rolling her eyes. "Fabulous, so this hot teacher will be traveling with all of you."

"Nah, it's all online work, B."

"Oh, good."

Snorting into a laugh, I bent to her ear. "Were you worried about your brother and the teacher? Or me?"

"Mmhm, both," she hummed, narrowing her eyes on me.

I breathed heavily through my nose, shaking my head, but I pulled her ear to my lips. "Don't. I don't give a shit who shows up on this tour. It's _you_ I'm leaving my heart with, understand? I only want _you_; I love _you_. Always. Okay, angel?"

She nodded and leaned into me until she caught sight of something over my shoulder.

"Dizzy Izzy? Is that you?" I heard in a smoky voice behind me.

"Harry!" she squealed, hopping down from her stool to rush to a rather large older man. He engulfed her in his arms, lifting her up off the floor. "It's good to see you!" she exclaimed, smiling when he set her back down and cupped her sweet face.

"Dear sweet Lord, you've gotten more beautiful. And you look just like your daddy, which is funny…considering he was an ugly thing," he teased her, and he glanced up, smiling. "Is that little Mikey, too?"

"Hey, Harry," Mike greeted, receiving a bear hug from the man.

"Damn, kid. You shot up!" Harry's eyes landed on our table, taking in every one of us. "Now, what have we here? I know you boys…"

"Harry, meet Radiant Eclipse," Bella introduced, pointing out each one of us, along with Emmett and Rose. "And this is Masen, my boyfriend."

It caught me by surprise that she introduced me by my stage name, but it made sense. She was protective of Edward. Masen was the public figure, and he had been on display all damn day, so since we were all out together as a band, Masen it was.

"Sir, it's good to meet you," I said, holding out my hand.

He eyed me shrewdly, but a smile played over his face slowly. "Never pegged Bella for snaggin' a music man, but it kinda makes sense. You treat her good, you hear?"

"Yes, sir. Without a doubt," I vowed.

"Well, I'll be damned nervous up on stage in front of the high and mighty hometown rock heroes. You're about to head out on tour, right?" he asked, and we all nodded. He turned to Mike. "You too, kid?"

"Yeah, I just took their drummer's place."

"Now that's what I'm talkin' 'bout!" he praised, turning to Bella. "Your mother must be in a tizzy, Dizzy," he said, smiling at his own rhyme.

"She'll survive."

"I'm sure she will," Harry said with a chuckle. "Don't let that woman fool you, kids. She liked her music back in the day. Still does, I'd be willin' to bet. And now with _both_ her kids all wrapped up in it, she'll have no choice but to thaw out."

Bella grinned, leaning in to his kiss to her cheek.

"Now, I gotta go play. If I don't see you, don't you guys be strangers. Come see me."

"Come to Dad's bar," she countered. "It's still there. You can play if you want."

"I may do that, Dizzy."

He shot her a wink, gave Mike a handshake, and took the stage like he owned it. And he was _good_. It was old-school rock mixed with blues, and he nailed it. He called out Bella and Mike, only to play one of Charlie's songs. My girl was a happy, teary mess, and I couldn't help but like the guy.

I didn't drink, not only because I was driving but because I didn't want my last full fucking day with Bella to be miserable with a hangover. When the show was over, we verified our flight info with Rose before we all got into our cars and left, resigning ourselves to one last day at home.

I hissed a curse as we neared Charlie's Pub. The media was everywhere, paps and fans crowding around across the street.

"Pull into the alley," Bella said with a chuckle. "So it begins, huh?"

"Hm," I hummed unhappily. "I guess. Lucky the apartment stairs are in the alley far enough away from them."

She laughed and nodded, but when she opened the door, the din of noise was utterly ridiculous.

"_Masen! Masen…are you cheating on Heidi?"_

"_Is it true you're Chainsaw Charlie's daughter?"_

"_Masen, Isabella! How long have you two been together?"_

"_Masen, sources say Heidi is in your new video. What was it like working with her again after she called things off when you went to rehab?"_

"_Masen, what's Heidi think of your new relationship?"_

"_Isabella! Will you be touring with Radiant Eclipse?"_

I sighed, shaking my head and trying to ignore it all, though I could damn well figure out who their "sources" were. Aro and his motherfucking agenda… Bella rolled her eyes, and we took the stairs, sagging in relief when they blocked the view so the vultures couldn't see us from the opposite corner. The yelling stopped almost immediately.

Mumbling low, I answered all the questions just to make Bella smile. "Nope, not cheating. Yes, this beautiful thing is Charlie's daughter. Been dating for…oh, about two months, but I think I fell in love with her the second I saw her." I grinned at Bella's giggle as we took the last flight of stairs. "Working with Heidi was pure fucking torture. I honestly couldn't give a fuck what she thinks, though I'm sure it would be colorful. And sadly, no…I won't have my girl on tour…" My voice trailed off as we reached my door, and Bella spun to look up at me.

Her eyes were dark as she leaned against the door, her hand reaching for the front of my jeans. There was sadness but want, not to mention a small smile still playing on her face from my answers.

"How colorful?" she asked, grinning when I snorted into a rough laugh.

"You met her, angel. You can probably guess. I can imagine foul language and shallow comments."

Bella laughed softly again, reaching up to take my baseball cap off. "We can lose this now. I've missed your hair today." She dropped it onto the table beside the door, only to rake both of her hands through my hair as I stepped closer.

"I want you all to myself tomorrow, Bella," I told her, pressing her into the door. "I don't want to leave this apartment if we don't have to."

"Done," she vowed without even batting an eye.

Bella took my keys out of my hand, and despite how close I was to her, she turned to unlock the door, though her hands shook when I pressed into her from behind.

"Edward…" Her voice started as a warning but then trailed off into something just short of pleading, because I was making sure she could feel just how badly I wanted her.

She pushed the door open, but I didn't let her get far once we were inside. Slamming the door and pulling her back to me, I pushed her hair to the side, inhaling the skin of her neck up to the sweet, sensitive spot just behind her ear.

"Is it wrong that all I want is you…in every way fucking imaginable?" I asked softly, nipping lightly at her earlobe. "All fucking night…all day tomorrow… I don't wanna come up for air, angel. Not until I absolutely fucking have to, and even then I want to be able to still feel you, smell you once I'm gone. Does that… Am I crazy?"

She shook her head vehemently, spinning around in front of me, only to grab my face and bring my lips to hers. "God, no… I want that, too," she whimpered before kissing me fully.

I knew we were frantic about this upcoming tour and being apart. I knew we were pushing all that into something physical, but fuck I needed her. I needed reassurance that she'd still be mine when I came home, that she wouldn't let time or rumors or bullshit affect us.

I whispered those very words against the skin of her throat as I pushed her jacket off, shrugged out of my own, and practically ripped her shirt off over her head. We left a trail of clothes, shoes, and underwear across my entire apartment just to tumble into my bed, but Bella reached up to stop me, her hands flat on either side of my face.

"Edward… Baby, look at me," she stated firmly, and I pulled away from her gloriously sexy piercings to meet stern and serious. "I _am_ yours. Please, if you ever believe anything…believe in that."

Nodding, I pressed my forehead to hers. "I know. I do, but… I just…"

"No, there are no 'buts,'" she argued, brushing her lips across mine. "I love you, and I'll miss you…so much. We will find a way to keep this…_this_, Edward. Us."

My heart _ached_ with my love for her. The guilt of leaving her made me desperate to love her, to make sure she knew she was it for me. I had no more words, though. None. I simply couldn't say all that was pent up inside me, so I showed her. I lost myself in her skin, in tracing every tattoo with my tongue, with teasing those nipple piercings with my teeth…all in order to hear my name, to see sweet yet desperate smiles when something tickled, and to finally taste her on my tongue as she fell apart while my mouth drank her in.

She was a panting, slightly sweaty pile of goo as I kissed my way from her delectable pussy, across her hips and ink, pausing to suck at her nipples, and finally meeting her orgasm-hazy eyes. Without saying anything, I lined up with her entrance and slid in as deep as I could, both of us moaning at the feel.

I wanted to take my time, but I knew it wouldn't happen, not this round, and as I started to move, as the feel of her warmth and wetness surrounded me, I knew I wouldn't last. But it didn't matter because I was determined to get as much of her as she'd allow before I got on that fucking plane.

**~oOo~**

I glanced around my apartment, shaking my head. The bathroom light cast enough illumination to let me see the pile of luggage, my guitar case, and the clothes we'd never picked up…or put on at all the previous day. We'd never left my apartment after Harry's show, just like we'd wanted, but our time was now up.

My alarm would go off any minute. I knew it would, yet I wanted to throw my phone across the room in order to stop time. It wouldn't work, but it would make me fucking feel better. At least, I'd feel okay for a second, and then I'd be pissed about my phone.

Sighing, I pulled Bella closer. She was sleeping soundly, peacefully. We'd come home from Slammers, and we hadn't left each other's side for longer than a few minutes. The whole next day had been spent in various states of undress, of being connected to each other in every sense, and we even set up the tablets I'd bought, just so we knew what the hell we were doing when we were apart.

I smiled against her shoulder at the memory of picking games to play against each other, taking silly selfies, and pretty much drowning ourselves in one another.

The day wasn't without its hitches. There had been a moment when all of it – the packing, the planning, the sadness of it all – caused us to snap. It didn't last, and neither of us meant a damn word, and we'd ended up simply laughing at the stupidity of it all.

Brushing kisses along the ink on her shoulder, I whispered I was sorry for being an idiot, that I loved her, and that I would miss her like the air I breathed.

Bella snorted, rolling over to face me with sleepy eyes. "Me, too."

I pushed her hair from her face, smiling at her. I knew time was ticking, but I just wanted to touch her. Skimming my flat hand down her side and over her hip, I eyed the splash of color up the side of her ribs.

"You ever think of getting another tattoo?" I asked, delaying the inevitable.

She smiled, her finger tracing my own ink on my chest. She rewrote "Thicker Than Water" over and over as she nodded.

"I have," she answered. "I just haven't figured out where or what. What about you?"

"Oh yeah, all the time. I'd actually thought about flying my tattoo artist out on tour once, but…I never did. What about more piercings?"

"No, no more of those. You? I see you aren't—"

"Nah, never been interested." I cupped her breast, rolling my thumb over the ring in her nipple. "But fuck, I love them on you…" Kissing it, I pulled away. "Ink, though, I'm all for."

She grinned, shaking her head, her hand now flat on my skin. "Where and what, Edward? Your sleeves are done. Your chest is covered, though there's room on your back…"

"Exactly. My back, and I have an idea, but I'm not sure yet."

"We should go together."

I froze for a moment. "Yeah? That'd be… Fuck, baby, I'd love that!"

"Okay, so…how about when you take your first break? Hmm?"

I could see what she was doing, and I fucking loved her for it. She was giving us a goal, something to look toward in order to endure this shit.

Kissing her lips, I whispered, "Okay. It's a date." Grinning at her giggle, I nuzzled her nose with mine, just loving her a little bit more, but the sweet, calm moment was shattered by the alarm.

It continued to ring loudly as we stared at each other with wide, scared eyes. Bella's hands slipped up my chest and into my hair, bringing me in for a frantic yet deep kiss.

When she pulled back, she was breathing heavily, tears welling up in her eyes. "We can do this, you know. We're better than all the bullshit." Her voice wavered with that reminder of our very first conversation, and I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that she was right. I just couldn't say it yet.

Nodding, I hugged her closer before finally shutting off that demonic alarm. We showered quietly but with continuous touches and kisses. We dressed in that same sad silence, and as she finished up in the bathroom, I loaded her car with my bags and guitar case.

When she stepped into the room, our eyes met. "You sure you wanna go to the airport?" When she narrowed her eyes dangerously at me, I grinned. "I meant…it's a pain in the ass, angel. And Tony would come…"

"Shut up, Edward," she said, smirking my way. "As nice as Tony is, I'm not sure you want him kissing you goodbye at the security check."

Chuckling, I felt my face heat at her teasing. "Uh, no. Unfortunately Tony isn't saying goodbye. He's coming with."

"Get in my car," she ordered, rolling her eyes at my attempt at being funny.

I glanced around the apartment one more time, and then I drank in the sight of the gorgeous girl waiting patiently by my door. I wanted this. I wanted it on an every-damn-day basis. I wanted her and the comfort that she and this apartment had given me the last few months. In all my traveling, in all the homes and apartments I'd lived, nothing had felt as much like home as the place I was currently standing. I just had to get through one more tour, the next several months of traveling and shows, and then…I could write my own ticket. The band would sever from Volturi Records, and we'd make our own rules, our own touring schedule, and it would make or break us, but I honestly couldn't find it in me to worry about being responsible for producing our own music. What was the worst that could happen? Radiant Eclipse could go back to performing in bars like Charlie's? Or we take time off? Nope, none of that was a concern.

"Edward?" she called softly, slipping her hand into mine.

"I was just…" I sighed, dragging my gaze from the bed we'd pretty much stayed in for the last twenty-four hours. It was twisted sheets and rumpled pillows, love and sex and smiles. "I wanted to remember it. Just like this. I need it." I tapped my temple and smiled. "And I want it to look just like this when I get back."

She giggled. "I'll see what I can do. I'm watching your car and this place, baby. Don't worry."

"I'm not worried." I stated that and meant it as we finally locked my door and made our way down to her car. My things, my property was perfectly safe. My heart was scared. It was terrified of being away from Bella and the relief she brought when I could truly be _me _with her. It was afraid that she might hate being apart and everything she'd see. I dreaded having to slip back into the Masen persona on a full-time basis, because I was losing that edge after all this time. And I was scared to fucking death that the media would stalk my girl, haunt her, making her second-guess every-fucking-thing.

But Bella was so damn strong, and I needed to keep that in mind. Our fingers were linked the entire ride to the airport, and I frequently brought them up to kiss hers, the back of her hand, her wrist.

We still didn't say much, other than the occasional directions as to where she should park, what gate I needed, and whether or not she could carry something, which was no. A member of security met us at the door and led us quickly past the lines for check-in and the throngs of media to an unmarked door, which was a private hallway. We walked through the back ways of the airport holding hands, despite my bags. Coming to a stop in front of another door, the security guy gave us a nod and a smile to go on into the VIP lounge I'd seen more times than I could count.

The room was filled with just about everyone. I could see Jasper, Tony, and Emmett, all of whom were kicked back in chairs. Tanya and Kate were chatting with Rose and Alice. Alec was hugging Carrie, whose belly was much rounder than the last time I'd seen her, and that made my thoughts return to what I wanted for a future. Jacob was smiling at a girl with tan skin and a pretty smile, and I had to guess that was Leah, his girlfriend and the nurse who took care of his father. Lastly, I smiled at Mike, who was allowing Renee to hug him, adjust his collar, and essentially fawn all over him.

"Your mom's here, angel," I told her, smiling over at her as we got closer.

"I see that," she said with a laugh. "She looks…calm."

Chuckling, I kissed the side of her head. "She'll be fine."

Rose stepped away from everyone to meet up with us, her face calm, but she was in pure management mode, I could see as she handed me my ticket first and then directed my bags to be taken away.

"Okay, so… You're not gonna believe this shit," she stated, holding out her phone, and I took it from her in order to see the latest tabloid crap. "I knew when I spun that shit against Heidi when she broke it off with you that it would cash in big fucking time! Look at this shit! They _love you two._ The majority of the opinions are… Well, they simply don't care what Heidi says or does; they adore the two of you! The rehab stuff was brought back up and then paired with those pictures from Pike Place. You two are like…the new _it_ couple!"

Bella giggled, shaking her head and scrolling through Rose's phone. "Rock Royalty, huh?"

I laughed before I could stop it, wrapping an arm around Bella from behind and reading over her shoulder. Sure as shit, the title of the damn online article was _Rock's New Royal Couple_. It spoke of local guitar legend Chainsaw Charlie Swan and how his daughter was now seen out and about with Seattle's hometown rock god, Masen. Apparently the two of us met when, just after rehab, I'd moved into the hotel around the corner from Charlie's Pub. While they had it mostly correct, their timing was off, but I didn't give a shit about their meaningless details. At least they weren't hating on my girl. Heidi was a different story. It seemed her shallow personality had gone public, and I couldn't give a damn about that either. Though, I did find in interesting she'd been seen at dinner with James recently, but I tucked that info away for a chat with Rose.

"Hmm," I hummed in Bella's hear. "I still think you're closer to an angel than a princess…"

She snorted adorably into a soft laugh but leaned into me. "What did I tell you?"

Grinning, I kissed her neck, murmuring, "Don't care what'choo say, baby. I know what I know."

A few flights started to get called over the speakers, and Rose turned to face everyone. "We'll be up soon, so get yourselves ready."

We all stopped to say goodbye to those staying behind. It was at that moment my heart started to really fucking ache. It took all I had to give Bella a minute with her brother, to push aside the selfish need to keep her as long as possible.

"I don't know who I'm gonna miss more," she said to Mike, who grinned at her. "I want you to stay safe and smart. Keep up with your schoolwork, too, Mikey. I'm not kidding. I will find out, so no slacking just because you've hit the big time, okay?"

"Yeah, B. I promise," he vowed to her, and I could see he'd do just about anything she told him. He loved and respected her, and in turn, she spoiled him rotten. And I instantly felt badly that I was taking him away from her. If he'd wavered in any way the day of his audition, I'd have snuffed the whole damn thing, but he hadn't, and I had a feeling he'd take to the business like a fish to water. He bent to her ear, whispering words I couldn't hear, and her eyes welled up as she nodded into his shoulder. "Love you, B…and I'll check in like Charlie did…every other day. 'Kay?"

She nodded, tears spilling over, and I couldn't stay away from her a second longer. Mike gripped my shoulder before walking away, leaving us alone in a corner…well, as alone as we could be with everyone we knew around us.

Cupping Bella's face, I swiped away her tears gently with my thumbs. "Look at me, angel," I whispered, though it sounded like begging. When those dark, sad eyes met mine, I pressed my forehead to hers. "I owe you a thank-you, Bella. Thank you for saving my ass repeatedly. Thank you for protecting me with the heart of a lioness. And thank you for giving me back...me. I was losing myself in the bullshit, angel. I was. And you… You wiped it all away, and I found _me_ again. But I found myself better than before because you… You make me better, baby."

"I love you," she said through sniffles and an almost-smile.

"Oh, angel… I love you so, so much. And _that's_ what makes me a better man. That sentence…and every beautiful time you say it. And I will bust my ass to get back to it. The very second you want to fly out to me, you let me know, and I'll move mountains to get you there. If you can't, then I'll be home in a few months. _Home_, Bella. You're my home now. Do you understand?" When her crying started in earnest, I wrapped her up and lifted her in a hug. "Shhh, baby," I said in her ear when she burrowed into the crook of my neck. "Please, _please_ don't cry…"

Her fingers gripped the back of my jacket as my sweet thing tried her damnedest to calm down.

I kept her in my arms, her small sneakers dangling just above the carpet. She pulled back from my neck, and she'd never looked more beautiful to me. It didn't matter that her tears ran unchecked down her sweet face or that her eyes were red and puffy. None of that mattered when she set her elbows on my shoulders in order to place her hands flat on either side of my face. She pulled me in for a kiss, and it was salty, sweet, and heartbreaking, all at the same time.

"Make me a promise," she said through a hiccup.

"The world, angel."

"Don't let it get to you. Don't forget you're _Edward_ to me. You may be Masen to everyone else in the world, but you're _my_ Edward. My…fidgety, kind, caring Edward who blushes when he's nervous or says something so awkwardly sweet that he's now ruined me for life for any other man on this planet."

Almost on command, my face heated, and I tried to smile but couldn't.

A sob caught in her throat. "Oh, God, _that_! I love it so much, and I'm gonna miss it with a sickness." She pressed her lips roughly to mine. "I promise I'll come to you, but I have to work a schedule with—"

I kissed her again to stop her. "I know…just let me know when. I'll pick you up myself."

Suddenly, it was a battle of promises.

"Don't close the bar too many times by yourself. Use that security company Rose gave you."

"Make sure Emmett keeps you safe, and I'll check on your parents, I promise."

"I swear I'll watch over Mike. He'll be too tired and busy the first few weeks to get into any trouble anyway."

"Call me, text me…I don't care what time, okay?"

"I will, so much that you'll be sick of me."

"Never."

"No matter what you see, you call any of us, and we'll work it out. Illusions, Bella. Okay?"

"Video call when you get to your hotel?"

"Absolutely. Fuck, I'd keep it on twenty-four-seven if I could, just to keep you close."

We smiled a little at all of that, but I set her back down to the floor and pressed my forehead to hers.

"Fuck, Bella… I miss you already."

"Me, too."

"If you… If it's too much… I…"

"Shh… You made me yours, Edward, remember? Now you're stuck."

I kissed her fully, public image, airline security guarding the doors, and whistles from my bandmates be-damned. I tasted her, claimed her, and her lips were so soft due to her crying. Her fingers gripped the sides of my T-shirt underneath my jacket, and I had to force my own not to pick her up and run away with her.

"Edward, we have to go," I heard softly over Bella's shoulder, and I pulled away to see the sad faces of Tanya and Kate. "I know, sweetie, but… It's time."

Nodding to them, I looked back down at Bella. "I… You're everything to me, angel. You need to know that…I want it all with you. I want to figure out how to do _this _without breaking us in two every-fucking-time. I want…just… And fuck, I love you, and I need to hear you say it back before I lose my shit in front of God and everyone in this motherfucking airport."

"I love you, Edward." She smiled through her tears at my crazy rant.

Steeling my resolve, I pressed my lips to hers one more time before following everyone out. It felt like I'd been ripped into two pieces, and as security loomed closer, I shot one more glance and a wave back to Bella before stepping into the hallway. We were ushered through a private security check and then onto the plane.

Per usual, we were the last to board, which always caused a stir among the other passengers. I stowed my bag in the overhead compartment, taking the aisle seat. There was a gentleman already in the window seat next to me. He was dressed in an expensive business suit, but he gave me a second glance and a small smile.

"Masen, right? From Radiant Eclipse?" he asked softly, glancing up at the rest of the band settling into their seats.

Taking a deep breath, I slipped on the mask, the persona that I'd have to wear for the next several months. I almost had to force the smile, but it came, along with a quick nod. I'd do what my angel asked of me. I'd give the world Masen and bring Edward home to her.

"Yeah, man…that's me."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… I know. Take a deep breath and let it out. He's off on tour. We see Bella's POV next.**

**QUESTIONS… **

**Why can't Bella just go? Because she has two employees she has to work with who have lives and schedules. With the holidays coming up, it would be unfair to leave them for months. Trust me, I've got a plan.**

**Is it in his contract somewhere that Aro has say over how Edward portrays himself? No. BUT…Aro has always guided them in a specific way on how they are **_**seen**_**. He leaked rumors and set situations up to look a specific way in order to gain attention. And it worked; they are at the big-time level of popular. Edward never really cared…or Masen, really…simply because he could ignore it. Now…it matters, if only because it has gotten old, he's gone through a shit-ton of issues with his family, and now, he has Bella, whom he wants to protect from it all. Aro continues to do it, because it's what he's always done. He doesn't hear the boys when they say they're tired of it. The Masen/Heidi rumor, which turned into a real relationship, worked to gain attention, as well. Aro is trying to use it again. Now…it won't work. ;)**

**Esme had to have known about Carlisle… Yes. Yes, she did. Denial isn't just for addicts. Hmm? And the story isn't over, so…yeah.**

**Do I have a specific song in mind for what Edward is "writing?" Oh, yes! LOL I do. And you'll see it soon. I promise. Someone already guessed at it, and they **_**nailed**_** it. :D The video making goddess, Smusic, is already hard at work on something, and OMG, it's amazing!**

**Okay…playlist and pics are in their usual places. Next update will be Sunday. I may have to shift the mid-week updates to Thursday for a bit, but I'll let you know by Sunday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	17. Here Without You

**A/N… I know, you want him back, or her to go to him. I get it. And I try to keep this…not so tedious. I'll let you get to it…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 17 – Here Without You**

_A hundred days have made me older  
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face  
A thousand lies have made me colder  
And I don't think I can look at this the same_

_But all the miles that separate_  
_Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face_

_I'm here without you, baby_  
_But you're still on my lonely mind_  
_I think about you, baby_  
_And I dream about you all the time_  
_I'm here without you, baby_

_But you're still with me in my dreams_  
_And tonight it's only you and me, yeah._

_The miles just keep rollin'_  
_As the people leave their way to say hello_  
_I've heard this life is overrated_  
_But I hope that it gets better as we go, oh, yeah, yeah_

"_Here Without You" – 3 Doors Down_

**BELLA**

The door of the VIP lounge shut behind Edward, and I was immediately wrapped up in two sets of arms.

"We'll take good care of him, Bella," Tanya vowed.

"Promise," Kate added, smiling when I gave them both a wavering smile and a nod.

"And…we'll keep his ass outta trouble." Tanya winked when I gave her a sniffly laugh. "We've been doing it for years. Now we'll do it for you. Just…don't give up on him while he's gone. You see something screwy, call us."

Nodding, I hugged them both one more time before they walked out of the lounge. I turned to leave the room, only to come face to face with my mother.

"C'mere, baby girl," she whispered, her own eyes red from crying.

I couldn't resist, if only because I needed it. I needed my _mom_. Though, I wasn't sure what my reaction would be should she choose to lecture me at that moment. I'd probably lose my shit, because it was hard enough watching Edward practically break himself in order to go do what he needed to do.

I fell into her embrace with a sob, and her words were a surprise when they met my ear.

"You love him," she stated instead of asking. When I nodded, she kissed the side of my head. "It's big and overwhelming, Isabella, I know. For a second there, I didn't think he'd leave." There was a smile in her voice, and I pulled back to see if she was making fun, but her face was warm and kind. "I… You should know that…" She sighed, shaking her head a little. "I never hated what your father did for a living. I hated the time apart. I hated that _I_ couldn't make him as happy as music did. I hated the doubt, the loneliness. But you… You're different. You're stronger than I ever was or ever will be, sweetheart. You're Charlie made over."

I smiled and sniffled at the same time, and she reached up to cup my face and wipe my tears away with her thumbs.

"Your dad taught you how to be independent, self-sufficient, something I'd have never been able to do. I was too young when I met him, and it was fire and love and overwhelming need, and I wanted to capture that. I wanted to hold on to it, even when I knew I couldn't…or _shouldn't_.

"It would've been like keeping a firefly in a jar… He would've faded away." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "You said something a few weeks ago, and I didn't hear you then, but I see it now. You said Masen isn't your father. And you're right, Bella."

My gaze snapped up when she called me that. She always used my full name, but I was also shocked that she'd been listening.

She smiled. "When you're in the room, you are his sunlight. He's drawn to you, and I can see he'd do whatever he needed to make sure you know that. Hell, he'd probably stay had you asked him, but take it from someone who knows… Don't. Don't force him into something he can't do, because that'll only lead to resentment and bitterness. Sweetheart, you have just enough of Charlie in you that you can handle what he does, survive the apart time. I think you two will figure out a way that works for you, and _that_ is where you two are different than your father and me. You'll talk it out. We didn't. And that was our biggest mistake. Our biggest achievement was _you_."

Smiling, I nodded, hoping she was right, that we'd figure us out, even with the time apart. I wiped my face of tears, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.

"Why?" I asked her, suddenly serious. "Why is it okay now? You…you've spent Mike's and my whole lives telling us how…terrible it was."

Mom sighed, gazing around the now empty lounge, only to look back to me. "'Cause both of you really would've hated me. I wanted to protect you both, but I refused to make the same mistake with you and Michael as I did with Charlie. I won't deny your happiness. Charlie didn't deny me mine."

I gasped. "You knew. You knew he—"

"That he set me free in order to live a normal life? Of course I knew!" She laughed a little. "Charlie was a lot of things, but he was never selfish."

"Then…then… Why didn't you go back to him?"

"I am happy, Isabella. I tried to be happy with Michael's father, but I'm _truly_ happy with Phil. Despite how much I loved your father, I changed. He didn't. I was so young when I was with him, when I had you, but people grow and change as they get older, and my priorities shifted. I wanted something stable for you, then for Michael, and your father couldn't give me that. Sweetie, you remember the best parts of your dad, and that's fantastic, but I kept from you all the times he cancelled or didn't show, simply because he was lost in his work. I always loved Charlie, but even if he'd given me everything I asked for, it never would've worked. We were too different. He saw it when I didn't. You have that part of him, Bella. You do. You have that same…comfortable-in-your-own-skin thing, that fearless honesty, but I think you have my down-to-earth sense, which will keep you and Masen on the right path."

Studying her face, I saw she was being completely honest. There wasn't the haughtiness or derisive laugh when we talked about Dad. The wall she kept up was gone…at least for the moment. Or hell, maybe even permanently, simply because her children were now wrapped up in the very thing she'd tried to stop.

"And Mike?" I asked her.

She grinned, shaking her head. "I can't deny his talent, and I can't honestly keep him from anything now that he's eighteen. But watching him play the day of his audition was both…scary and humbling. I fought it, but…it was useless. I'm very proud of him, and I owe that to you, Isabella. You saw something in him and handed it to him on a silver platter."

I felt my cheeks heat, and I nodded, pointing toward the door. "I guess we should go, huh? Did you drive?"

"Actually, no. Rose sent a car service for Michael and me."

"C'mon, then. I'll drop you home, Mom."

**~oOo~**

"Angel," Edward sighed, falling down onto the hotel bed. "Damn, baby, you're a sight for sore eyes."

My Edward looked exhausted, just wrecked, but I loved our video chats. They'd started from the moment he'd left Seattle and landed in Boston for the start of the tour. He always called me when he'd get checked in to a new hotel. We texted constantly, played games against each other – the man could kick my ass at Words With Friends, but I had him beat with Trivia Crack – and the video calls were always the last thing of the night. He'd wait until I closed up the bar so we could talk as long as we wished…or when one of us fell asleep, which happened more times than not.

It was that last thought that had me blurting out, "God, I miss you."

As much as I enjoyed the closeness we were gaining by this new way of communicating, not to mention I'd seen just as much of their travels as they did, I just…missed him. Radiant Eclipse had kicked off their tour in Boston, traveling north all the way up to Maine, and they'd finally U-turned around to head back south a little. It was almost Thanksgiving, so they'd just arrived in Rhode Island.

"What'choo miss, angel?" he asked with a laugh, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. "All my stomping around upstairs?"

"Yes." I laughed at his sweet blush. "I miss you on your treadmill."

His brow wrinkled as a slow, sexy smile curled up one side of his mouth. "I can't imagine why, and you won't tell me."

"It's…sexy," I teased him, ignoring his snort into a laugh. "Actually, it's just the sound of you being close, Edward. That's all."

"I miss you, too," he answered simply. "I hate that we won't be together for Thanksgiving."

"Me, too, but…" I sang, holding up a finger. "My goal is to meet you in New York for Christmas."

"Shut the fuck up! Really? Don't tease, angel! I can't fucking take it. Not that!"

Giggling at his exuberance, I nodded. "No, I mean it. I was trying to let Tori and Garrett have Thanksgiving off…or at least, a few days in a row. But in return, they're gonna cover Christmas for me."

"That's… That would… Bella, please! I'm begging you… I'll do anything."

His pleading hurt my heart. I knew he was tired, and I knew he was missing me, but he looked so damned lost at the moment. I'd talked and texted with my brother, with Tanya, but mostly with Rose, and they all told me he was closing in on himself. He'd perform, clean up, and then head to the hotel. That was it.

"Yeah, I asked Rose for your exact itinerary so I can start…"

"No, wait… Let me do it, Bella. Please? Let me make all the arrangements. For me?" he asked, placing a hand on his chest as he looked so damned sweet. When I nodded, his face split into the biggest, most boyish smile I'd ever seen, and I was pretty sure I fell in love with him all over again. "Please? I told you… All you had to do was say the word."

"Aw, Edward," I sighed, shaking my head and tearing up at just how much I missed him. "Okay…do it. I'll close up the bar if I have to, but I have to see you."

"God, you don't know how happy that makes me, Bella."

Smiling, I pointed toward the tablet I had sitting up against my legs as I leaned back to my headboard. "I think I do."

Chuckling, he shook his head. "Maybe."

"How's my brother handling things?" I asked him, wanting his opinion, not just my baby brother's usual answer of "fine."

"He's so good, Bella," Edward said with a grin and a slow shake of his head. "He's taken to the stage like a pro, and he's even dealing with the tour bus and travel okay."

"And the media?" I asked, scrunching up my nose.

We knew that replacing James hadn't been publicized until they'd started the tour. The filming of the video had been kept pretty quiet, but now that they were playing in front of thousands of people, James's absence was noticed. As talented as Mike was, people simply were nosy, and the band addressed it with a prewritten statement to morning talk shows and radio interviews with: "James's contract expired, and we parted ways. We wish him the best of luck in future endeavors."

They weren't going to trash-talk their former drummer, and they wanted Mike to be accepted. So far he was, though he was still the focus of curious fans.

"He's doing as well as he can. He keeps his head down, his eyes averted, and ignores the yelling. I think the first couple of paps crowds scared the shit out of him, but he's getting better."

"You would know," I said with a chuckle, which made him grin.

"What about you? They still making sure you're not cheating on me?"

Laughing, my head fell back with a soft thump to the wall behind my head board. "Yeah, what did I tell you?"

"Home, work, grocery store…that they'd be bored."

"Exactly," I sang. "Though, if you're concerned with my possible cheating, you can probably catch that gossip show tomorrow, talking about where Tori and I went out for coffee. It was debauchery at its finest, I tell ya. "

Edward laughed. "Nah, I'm good. Although…" He trailed off, his eyes narrowing. "Maybe I will. What'd you wear?"

"Edward," I groaned, breaking into laughter.

"I love you," he sighed, wearing a small, warm smile.

"Love you, too," I told him.

"I'm not kidding, angel. What'd you wear? I'll record it."

"I…I don't know, you silly ass. Jeans?"

It was so healing to watch him mellow out the longer we teased and laughed and caught up. The darkness in his eyes lightened the more we chatted, his smile went from forced to real and sweet and sexy, and his shoulders weren't so stiff and hunched. Even when it was just talking on the phone, he'd be the same way – his voice would go from terse and gruff to sweet and calm.

I wanted to reach out and touch him. I wanted to crawl into his lap just to feel the warmth of his hug when he'd wrap his arms all the way around me. I missed the feel of his scruffy face, his amazing kisses, and how soft his hair was when I'd plunge my fingers into it. And fuck me, I missed falling asleep to his voice, his breathing, his arms around me.

Our laughter died, and we were left staring at each other, missing each other with a sickness. My sleep had been shot to shit without him, so it wasn't shocking when a yawn overcame me.

"Hey, angel," he whispered, disappearing from the tablet's camera for a second. When he straightened back out, his hands were wrapped around his black acoustic. "Lie down, Bella… I'll play you to sleep."

A lump formed in my throat at the memory of the first time he'd done that, and that had been my dad's old piano from upstairs. I propped the tablet against the pillow he'd used the last time we'd slept in my bed. Curling up on my side, I let my eyes take in every inch of him. He performed every night for hundreds, maybe thousands of people, yet they never got this…this perfectly sweet and loving thing. They could have the image, the illusion of Masen. I'd take Edward any-damn-day.

His voice was soft, gentle, his playing simply perfect. He'd play old songs, love songs, even songs he'd make up on the spur of the moment, which usually ended up being so fucking silly. They'd be about the stupidest things – my pajamas, my laugh, my nipple rings, and my ass. The nipple rings had a song all their own, which I'm pretty sure he'd written down somewhere.

I smiled, swallowing the lump in my throat as I watched him play just for me. His song choice was an old love song, one I remembered my dad playing once or twice. As his voice surrounded my senses, I found myself finally relaxing after a few nights of bad sleep. Once my eyes closed, I felt myself drift off.

**~oOo~**

"Seriously, Edward?" I mumbled to myself as I eyed the word he'd just played on our game.

_Pussy._

My eyes narrowed dangerously at the winking emoticon he'd tossed into the chat box for good measure. The phone bleeped again with a message.

_You know…as in cat. ;)_

He was in deep shit, because it seemed he'd worked too damn hard on posting that one word, and it left me all sorts of openings for higher scoring words. I was still shaking my head and studying my letters when I felt Tori peek over my shoulder.

Her giggle-snort was priceless. "Get 'im back, boss. Here…those letters, down from the P he put in there. That'll also give you triple points."

Grinning, I dragged the letters over.

_Peen._

I quickly typed into the chat box: _You know…as in ball PEEN hammer. ;) And now we're even._

A string of curse words popped up in the chat, which made me laugh. If only he could use those in the game, he'd really take the lead.

_No fair, angel. :(_

I typed back quickly. _Then quit teasing and play the damn game. No PUSSY for you. No PEEN for me. Not for weeks!_

My phone immediately started to ring. I smiled at the picture of the two of us that popped up. It had been one of the many selfies we'd taken the day before he'd left Seattle. We were in his bed, messy hair, silly smiles, and bright eyes.

"I'm sorry!" His loud, happy laugh came through the line before I even said hello. "I couldn't help it. The letters were just there!"

"Hush, you," I grumbled, but I couldn't help but smile at his carefree laugh. He'd started to sound much better since we'd started to make plans for Christmas. "Where are you?"

"On the bus," he sighed, but I could still hear the amusement in his tone. "We're… Where the hell are we, anyway?" he asked someone, and I heard several voices chattering around him. "Oh. Delaware, angel."

Chuckling, I shook my head, simply because I couldn't imagine being all cramped up in that tour bus for hours at a time, even if it was only used for getting from one city to the other. Not to mention, Edward and my brother had complained more than one time that Jake was no longer allowed to eat Taco Bell before getting on the damn thing. They threatened to stash his gaseous ass in the luggage compartment.

"I'm glad you called, actually," I told him.

"Yeah? Why's that, baby?"

"Tomorrow's another family day at Serenity, and I was going to check in on your dad."

"Fuck, really?" he gasped. "Has he been in that long?"

"I think this is the last one, but I guess I'll find out tomorrow. Anything you want me to tell him?" I asked, walking through the bar to the back door in order to stay private.

"No, I mean… I talked to him a few days ago. He sounded good. Though, Mom hasn't visited him yet."

Something about that saddened me. But the whole situation was just…sad. In reality, Carlisle had brought all of it on himself with his lies and drunken mistakes, and I was well aware that aside from Edward, Esme had been through the most. Edward's legal issues from that DUI were all over. And as much as I hated that Edward had covered for his dad, hated that he would carry a record for the rest of his life, I was simply grateful no one was badly injured or killed in the whole process. I was also grateful Carlisle hadn't done it again before finally realizing he needed help, but he may lose his wife, so there was a price to be paid every-damn-where. Shit could've been a hell of a lot worse.

"What if… What if she never sees him, Bella?" Edward asked so softly.

He sounded like a little boy with that question, and my heart hurt for him, simply because his parents had always been together.

"I don't know, baby," I told him honestly. "She needs time, Edward. And speaking as a woman, I get that. Your dad seems to be getting his addiction under control. He's clean, but…the things he did before that have to be accounted for, and that's the hard shit. He lied, he put his boys in a terrible position, he…he used _you_ in the most terrible way, a cowardly way. And despite the fact that it was the alcohol doing the thinking for him, he still has to deal with the aftermath. All those lies, all that betrayal…not to mention her own denial… There may be more between them than his additions, stuff that you don't know, so… That's a lot to overcome, so you have to let them work it out."

"I know," he murmured. "Tell him… Tell him…" He sighed so heavily over the line that my whole body ached to hold him. "Tell him if she won't let him come home, then he can use my apartment while I'm away."

I needed his smile back in his voice, so teasing him was absolutely necessary. "Did you clear that with your landlord first?"

"Wha…? Wait…" He snorted, breaking into a chuckle. "Actually, no, but I figure she'd be okay with it, especially if I promised all sorts of sexual favors the next time I see her."

"Lucky landlady," I sang, giving a low whistle. "Good for _her_!"

Edward's laugh was deep and so very sexy over the line. "Seriously, angel. Do you mind?"

"No, Edward. I don't mind. And I'll be sure to tell him."

"Be sure to clean the beer out of my fridge and keep his ass outta your bar."

I flinched at the harshness there, but they all still had open wounds that needed to heal. Time was the only thing they had going for them. Hell, even the separation with the boys on the road might help, or it would all open back up when they returned. There was no telling at this point.

"Will do, baby." I promised, shaking my head a little. "Now…go play _real words_ on our game so I can survive this closing shift, Edward. No more teasing the girlfriend with sexy shit. Got me?"

"Dammit, and I had the word _tits_ ready to go," he teasing through a laugh.

"You're evil. Just wait… Vengeance is mine…_Masen_."

He was still laughing through his "Bye, angel. I love you," when we ended the call.

**~oOo~**

"Carlisle Cullen," I said to the receptionist at Serenity. When she glanced around me, I smiled and shrugged. "Just me. Bella Swan."

"Got it. Have a seat, and we'll take you back in a moment."

I sat in the same chair as the last time we'd been there. Poor Edward had been a nervous wreck that day, and I wasn't sure if it was seeing his dad or merely coming back to Serenity. Probably a little of both, which was understandable. I'd been able to see all over Edward's and Emmett's faces just how badly they just wanted their father back. Despite all that Carlisle had done, despite all that he'd asked of them, the boys really just wanted their family in one piece. It was that simple.

Their interactions together were entrenched with history – deep, close and, at one time, fun family history. I'd watched them the last time, and the three of them seemed to ache for the past. Having lost my own father, I hoped they got that back eventually. Their road was rocky, filled with lies and disappointments and misunderstandings. While Edward's parents had tried to shelter him and his brother from the music world – something I knew a lot about because of my mother – they'd gone about it in the wrong way, pushing and fighting, which had driven a wedge between them all. It was that wedge, that rift between parents and children, that most likely drove Carlisle's addiction to an all-time high.

"Cullen?" I heard from the doorway, and I smiled at the same nurse from the last time – Ron. He nodded my way, wearing a warm smile. "Right this way. I'm surprised to see anyone here today. Masen's off touring, right?"

"Yeah, he's on the other side of the country right now," I told him, following him down the hallway to the locker. I stowed my phone and purse, taking the key from Ron.

I stayed quiet as he led me to Dr. Cope's office, smiling when the doctor greeted me at the door. "It's good to see you again, Bella. How's Masen?"

"He's…busy," I said with a laugh at the understatement. When I glanced over at the sofa, Carlisle was getting up, his face a little surprised. "Carlisle," I greeted, walking to him. I squeaked when he pulled me into a hug.

"Sorry," he murmured, wearing the half-smile he'd passed on to both his sons. "I'm just… I'm surprised to see you, Bella."

"I made a promise to Edward. I usually keep my word," I explained, shrugging a shoulder.

"I see that." His voice was soft as we both took a seat. "How are they? I haven't talked to either of them since Thanksgiving, and they were in Rhode Island."

"Oh, right about now, they're probably heading into New Hampshire. They've just about covered all of New England."

We were closing in on the second week of December; my visit to New York was looming closer and yet taking forever to get here. Edward had made all the arrangements – with Rose's help, of course – but I'd be with them through Christmas in New York, and I'd spend the week with them. I'd head home from Nashville after New Year's Eve. I wasn't sure what to think about traveling with them, but I was willing to do just about anything to see Edward face to face.

"How's he handling the pressure of being back on the road again?" Dr. Cope asked, and I could see the question was for Carlisle's benefit.

"He's tired, stressed out, homesick," I said, smiling at the last word. "But…he's proud of the tour and the fans seem to like their new album."

"Your brother seems to be a big hit, too," Carlisle pointed out, smirking when I looked over at him.

"Yeah, Mike…he's always been talented, so this is his dream come true."

Dr. Cope and Carlisle chuckled a little at that, but the doctor sat forward a little in her chair. "Carlisle, is it okay to share with Bella?"

"Yeah, she's… She's here for my boys. They'll want an outside opinion, I imagine," he replied, glancing down at his hands in a way that reminded me so much of Edward.

"Okay," Dr. Cope agreed, pulling her notebook to her lap. "Carlisle's come a long way since the last time you were here, Bella. The anti-depression prescription I wrote for him is working rather well. His detox took a bit of time, but with diet and exercise, he's learned to curb some of the cravings."

"Well, and I'm in my fifties, so I _should_ be watching my health."

Grinning at his eye roll, I turned back to the doctor.

"That's very true," Dr. Cope said with a light laugh. She went back to her notes. "We're coming up on the end of Carlisle's stay here. There are several things I'm pleased to see, but some things are a concern." She glanced to Carlisle again, and he nodded for her to continue. "I've advised Carlisle to seek therapy at least twice a week to start once he's out, and I believe the therapist I have in mind works out of the same hospital as you."

"He does. Dr. Banner. He's a friend, but he's good. He's already agreed to see me."

"Good." She turned back to me. "The tough part… As you may or may not know, Mrs. Cullen has not visited Carlisle. As understandable as that is…and it _is_ understandable," she reiterated with a sharp glance to Carlisle. "I fear the stress of a rocky marriage will be a problem, not to mention he's probably got one of the most stressful jobs out there."

Again, that thought saddened me, if only for Edward's and Emmett's sakes. Those two very strong, very sweet boys would be hurt if their parents couldn't work it out. But there was a part of me that knew they'd survive. My parents had never stayed together – hell, they'd never even married. It would suck for all of them, but they'd find a way to get through it.

"She hasn't called either?" I asked Carlisle.

He nodded. "She's called. She's asked for time, for a separation of sorts." His eyes locked with mine, and I knew we were talking about Edward, the accident, and his arrest, but we couldn't exactly talk about it inside that room. "Nothing legal…yet."

He grimaced at that, but he shrugged a shoulder – again, he reminded me of his sons with certain mannerisms.

"If nothing's changed when I get out of here, then I'll have to…"

"Edward wanted me to offer you his place… You know, while he's gone," I said, smiling when he gaped at me. "I talked to him yesterday."

"How do you feel about that, Carlisle?" the doctor asked, and I kind of wanted to know the answer myself. Sometimes I worried that Edward gave _too much_ when it came to his family.

Carlisle frowned, and he shook his head slowly. "I… I'm not sure. Guilty?" he said, though it came out like a question when he glanced between Dr. Cope and me. "I… I already owe my youngest son so much. I just… I'm not sure I _should_ take him up on it. It's a kind offer…too kind, considering, but…"

"Well, let me know," I told him, shrugging a shoulder. It was good that he recognized that he owed Edward, but I wondered if he knew _how much_. The part of me that protected Edward, that sheltered him from things wanted to wring Carlisle's neck, shake him in order to drive that home. Instead, I pointed out the important, not to mention the obvious. "You'd be living above me and above my bar, Carlisle."

"That would be quite the temptation."

We both glanced at the doctor when she spoke and then back to each other.

"She's right," Carlisle sighed, almost in defeat. "I feel…in control now, but I know I'm going to have bad days."

"Everyone has bad days," I countered, shaking my head at how much ugly shit was stacked against him. His career as a doctor was stressful enough, but to add in the fact that his wife may leave him was like pouring gasoline on a fire. "And I won't be home the week of Christmas to New Year's."

Carlisle smiled. "Going somewhere?"

"Yeah…" I chuckled, nodding a little. "New York. We're…We're trying to find some sort of…normal with us, so…"

"No, that's…good," Carlisle said. "I hope Edward appreciates what's he's found."

My brow wrinkled, and I frowned over at him. "Your son is…amazing. He's selfless – selfless to a fucking fault, as you well know, Carlisle. He's ridiculously honest, even when it makes him look awkward or silly. He's a brilliant musician, and he busts his ass every damn day to share that music with the masses, yet he'll play me to sleep over the phone. He tells me every day, via text, on the phone, or video chat, that he loves me. If anyone is appreciative in our relationship, it's me. I've never, ever met anyone like him."

The room was silent, awkwardly so, but Carlisle snorted into a chuckle. "Well, then, at least his mother and I did something right."

Smirking over at him, I nodded, but I was still feeling a little prickly, so I stayed quiet for a moment. I was protective of Edward to the point of madness, and there wasn't anything I could do about it. It just…was. It had been there the second he'd stumbled into my bar trying to hide from the media outside.

"Dr. Cope, I'd… Our session is pretty much over. I'd like to talk to Bella alone." Carlisle's voice was tentative but unwavering. He sounded in control, which was more than I could say for my own temper.

"It's too cold outside; it's starting to snow again, I see. Feel free to use my office," she offered, standing up from her chair. She set her notes down on her desk and stepped out of the room.

"You're upset with me," Carlisle said, dragging his gaze from the door to me.

I shook my head and rubbed my face. "No, I'm just… If I could shelter Edward from all the nasty shit in the world, I would. So…" I sighed deeply, pulling my hands from my face and meeting his warm blue eyes. "If anyone needs to be appreciative of things, it's you."

That statement fell between us heavily like a flat stone, but he nodded, getting up from the couch to start pacing.

"You think I don't know, Bella?" he asked, frowning over at me and shaking his head. "You think I don't relive that night over and over? I do. I _dream_ it. And in every damn dream, the outcome is different. Sometimes I take responsibility, and I _still _lose my wife, my sons. Sometimes little Bree doesn't make it, which wakes me up in a cold sweat. Sometimes I see my youngest son behind the wheel, and _he _doesn't make it. You see a pattern yet?" he asked harshly, but I nodded, thinking maybe he needed this off his chest. Edward worked the same way, blurting out all that bothered him in order to be able to breathe again. "I see my car over and over – twisted metal, spewing fluids, shattered glass, and blood. I relive it how it really happened, which is funny, because I could barely think straight that night. I have _so much_ I need to atone for, Bella. And I don't even know where to begin."

He placed both hands on his face, only to shove them into his hair.

"Why would he offer his apartment, sweetheart?" he asked, his voice breaking.

My eyes teared up a little, but a small laugh escaped me. "Because he loves you. It's that simple. When Edward loves…it's just… It's deep and perfect and endless. It comes from such a good place that it wraps you up and carries you away." We stared at each other again, and I shrugged a shoulder. "A part of me gets it, because I'd gladly give up everything to sit in a room like this with my dad again. I miss him. I miss him some days so badly that I can hardly breathe with the sadness of it all. A part of me _doesn't_ get it, though," I continued, frowning down at the coffee table in front of me. "Edward works so very hard to keep his public image separate from his private one, and he'd mastered it…until that night. He'd maintained a false character – Masen – and despite the fact that he was the poster child for bad boys all over the world, he'd managed to stay out of trouble. He offered up his clean record…for you. I can't think of _anyone_ who would do that, but he did. And he did it without even thinking twice. Mind you, I think the police did a piss-poor job, or they caught a hard-on for being able to arrest the local big celebrity, but still…he did it."

"He should be saying this to me."

"He should, but he won't. You're his dad. He's probably respected you, looked up to you his whole life, and all he wanted was to help you. He wanted to do something that made you see him differently."

"Emmett, too."

"Emmett, too," I readily agreed. I sighed, standing up from the couch. "And now Edward's going to carry that record, that sacrifice he made, for the rest of his life. It'll always be there. With every speeding ticket, with every background check, with every Internet search, there will be this…DUI glaring back at him." My nostrils flared as I fought to control my temper. "He's looked at differently because of it, and I realize that to try to take it back would bring more trouble on you guys than it's worth, but dammit, you need to figure out how to make it up to him. It was _you_ who made the deal with him and then reneged."

Carlisle's face stayed calm, despite the things I was saying. "You think I don't know? You're not saying anything that I haven't said to myself…that my _wife_ hasn't said to me. Repeatedly. These are the thoughts that keep me up at night."

"I'm sorry. I didn't…" I sighed, shaking my head. "I was supposed to check on you, not…"

Carlisle laughed, walking to me and setting his hands on my shoulders. His eyes met mine, and they seemed to be filled with something akin to pride or awe.

"You're protective of Edward, Bella. There's nothing wrong with that." He laughed again, saying, "You're protective of each other, sweetheart. That's how it _should_ be. I couldn't have handpicked a better match for my son. That's the truth. You're what he needs – the calm to his storm, the truth to his lies, and the shield to…well, this." He gestured to himself, standing up straight and letting go of my shoulders.

"You know how the music business works, but you have no desire for the fame, though it's coming at you anyway. And you let it roll right off you. You have any idea what Edward's last girlfriend was like?"

I wasn't expecting the question, so the laugh that snorted out of me was loud and ugly, but Carlisle grinned.

"I'll take that as a yes," he sighed, still smiling as he rolled his eyes. "Pretty thing, but my God, she was shallow."

"And responsible for a bunch of leaks," I added, and he grimaced at that. "She's still trying, but…" I shrugged a shoulder. "No one is really listening."

"Good." He smiled, reaching up to tap beneath my chin. "Bella, I'm not upset with what you said. To be honest, I'm glad my son… Actually, I'm glad both my sons have very strong women in their lives. I just…" He sighed deeply, holding his arms out, only to let them fall back to his sides. "I have no idea how to correct my mistake with Edward. To come clean to authorities would get him into more trouble, and I can't have that. I could pay him back every dime he put into it all – the medical bills for Bree, the car, the insurance, the thirty days in this place…"

"Edward doesn't want your money. Hell, had you owned up to it, he would've probably helped you."

"I know," he sighed again. "I… What _can_ I do?"

"I'm not sure. Maybe…ask him?" I offered, shrugging. "Ask him what you can do… He'll be home for almost a week, come February. You can ask him then. I'd offer to do it, but I think…it would be better coming from you, from his _dad_."

Carlisle seemed to mull that over for a moment but then let out a breath and nodded. "Okay," he said softly. "I'll do that."

I relaxed a little, seeing a touch of the real Carlisle Cullen. He was so much like Edward, carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. Where Edward had his music, had Masen and Radiant Eclipse to pour his heart, his soul, his ache into, Carlisle turned to alcohol. It happened every day, all over the world, and the earth still turned.

"And the apartment?" I asked him, starting for the door.

"I don't know, Bella," he said, sounding honest and sincere. "I'd like to think I can fix my marriage, but…I have to face the possibility that I may not. And it seems…so damn wrong to take from my son…again. So…I'm not sure."

I studied his face that was pinched in the painful truth he was saying. I smiled his way. "It's a roof over your head, if only until you figure something out. Just…let me know. And keep in mind about Christmas…"

"You won't be there… Got it," he replied with a smile and reached out to tug my sleeve. "Thank you, Bella…for coming. For everything you said. You… It meant a lot. Truly."

I hugged him, and I smiled, simply because he smelled like a dad – like aftershave and peppermint. He made me miss my dad's hugs, but I pulled back, nodding up to him. I walked down the hallway to get my things from the locker. By the time I stepped outside, the snow had slowed down, but I could tell there was more to come. I got into Edward's car, simply because he'd asked me to drive it occasionally, taking a deep breath of the smell. _That_ was the smell I'd missed. Edward. Leather and cologne and something woodsy.

The drive home was slow, icy, but when I pulled into the alley beside my bar, I gazed up at the third floor. A little over two more weeks. That's it. I laughed softly to myself, shaking my head. My life before was boring, with long nights pouring drinks, chatting with customers, and going home to my apartment. I had fun moments with my brother, and I missed him, too.

However, I'd never thought I needed anything, until that beautiful man, covered in ink and leather and the sexiest blush I'd ever seen, came stumbling into my bar. Now…I missed him like I'd miss a limb, and I knew I wouldn't change a thing – not the media or his family problems or his crazy job. But I did wish I could force time forward. I just had to get through the next few weeks.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Some of you guessed that Bella would check on Carlisle. And we'll be back with Edward next time around.**

**Not any questions this time…none that I can answer, anyway. But…I know you're itching for the song that Masen is "writing" to his angel, and the talented Smusic is finished with her **_**phenomenal**_** video, which will post soon as a teaser. Promise.**

****POSTING INFO** Due to RL scheduling issues, chapter updates will change to Thursdays and Sundays for now. If that changes, then I'll let you know. **

**The playlist and the pic teasers are in their usual places, and the next update will be Thursday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	18. Playing Star Again

**A/N… You guys rock… Some of you are worried about the two apart, and others are looking forward to Christmas. ;) We're back with Edward on this one…or Masen, really, since he's in his element.**

**I'll let you get to it. See me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 18 – Playing Star Again**

_Out there in the spotlight you're a million miles away  
Every ounce of energy, you try to give away  
As the sweat pours out your body like the music that you play_

_Later in the evening as you lie awake in bed_  
_With the echoes from the amplifiers ringin' in your head_  
_You smoke the days last cigarette, remembering what she said_

_Here I am, on the road again_  
_There I am, up on the stage_  
_Here I go, playing star again_  
_There I go, turn the page_

"_Turn the Page" – Metallica (orig. by Bob Seger)_

**EDWARD**

"Good night, Manchester!" I screamed, tossing my T-shirt into the audience, and the pyro went off like bombs, only for the lights to shut down.

The scream of the New Hampshire crowd was loud, and the music was still ringing in my ears as security and staff guided us off the stage. As soon as we were behind the curtain, the house lights went up, allowing the fans to leave. My heart was still ramming against my ribs, sweat pouring down my face as Emmett grabbed my bare shoulder. He led me through the halls to the dressing rooms. The place was smaller, so we were all crammed into one fairly large room, but there were food, drinks, and places to sit. However, showers would have to wait until we got back to the hotel.

Tomorrow we'd head out early on the tour buses for Buffalo. From there, it was Manhattan, and _that_ was what I was looking forward to the most. Not only was New York one of the best crowds and cities, but it was there I'd see my girl.

I chugged a bottle of water, tossing the empty into the bin and grabbing another. Jake and Alec were laughing over something or other. Alice was already packing up her things. Jasper was pouring water onto his head to cool the hell off. Despite the snowy weather outside, the arena had the heat on, and it was almost sweltering, never mind the lights and pyrotechnics were as hot as the surface of the sun. Mike shoved his hands into a bucket of ice water, opening and closing them slowly.

I jerked a chin at him. "Pain?"

"Nah, but they swell when we go that long."

We watched over the kid relentlessly, which probably drove him crazy, but we'd all promised Bella we'd keep him safe, keep him out of trouble. So far we were just damned tired. It always took at least halfway through the first leg of the tour to find some sort of…normal. Downtime was great, but it made us a touch lazy, so we had to get back into it all. With travel, performing, interviews, and photo shoots, there wasn't much time to find trouble anyway.

I started to gather my stuff together, pulling on my shirt and a hoodie, if only to get to my hotel room to shower, change, and video-call Bella. I was dying to know how her visit with my dad had gone, and fuck, I just missed my girl.

With that thought, I turned on my phone's screen, smiling at a few texts.

_I'm home from Serenity, and no, I didn't wreck your car._

_Internet is down due to snow. If my cell doesn't work, call my home._

_I love you, Edward. And only 13 more days. :)_

I shook my head at the weather and the fact that Bella had kicked my ass in one of our games. I'd have to get her back later. Sending her a quick text that I loved her and that I'd be at the hotel soon, I turned off the screen of my phone and put the thing in my pocket. I was just about to hunt down either Tony or a cab back to the hotel when Rose stepped into the room with Tanya and Kate coming in right behind her.

"Ah, shit…she's pissed," Alec groaned, and we all stared at her. "C'mon, Rosie…what the hell this time?"

"We just lost our opening act," she stated, grimacing a little. "Shattered Glass has to bow out the rest of the tour."

"That's a damn shame; they were pretty fucking good. Why?" I asked, leaning against the table.

Shattered Glass was four guys about Mike's age, with a song that was currently climbing the charts. Rose had been lucky to add them to our new tour.

"The two brothers have to go home. Their mom is sick…heart attack, if I'm not mistaken."

"So…we get that comedian or we live without one," Jasper suggested, shrugging a shoulder.

"No, we're getting Viper's Venom."

"Ah, _shit_!" I hissed, shaking my head and running a hand through my sweaty hair, but I pointed to Rose. "Aro did that shit on purpose!"

"Actually, no. It was me. It's who I could get on short notice, Edward. I'm sorry."

"Who? And what's wrong?" Mike asked, glancing between Rose and me with wide eyes.

"They're an all-girl rock band – more indie/underground than mainstream. They're damned good…but scary. The lead singer, Senna…she's had the hots for _Masen_ since our first tour," Jake explained, grinning my way and ducking when I threw my half-empty bottle at him. "I don't wanna hear it!" he yelled but was laughing at the same time. "At least you didn't…"

I was laughing as my head fell back. "That's very true. You did go there, didn't you?"

"Ah, Zafrina," he sighed nostalgically. "Never thought being tied up would be hot, but damn…"

Mike snorted, shaking his head and rolling his eyes my way. "So what's the problem, besides Jake's indiscretion?"

Grinning, I gripped his shoulder. "They're _crazy_. Like wild and scary crazy. This is just advice from someone who knows… Don't touch them. As hot as they are, they'll try anything once, and it doesn't matter whether it's legal or not."

He grimaced. "You?"

"Oh, hell no." I laughed again, shaking my head. "I partied with them once. _One time_." I held up a finger. "They were smokin' some shit that caused blurry vision and hallucinations, dude. I managed to escape. Jake obviously…didn't."

Jake was still grinning. "I think I still have scars," he muttered, turning around and yanking the waistband of his pants down just a bit, showing his upper ass cheek. "Is it still there? Teeth marks?"

"Oh, shit!" Mike hissed. "Um, no thank you."

Seriously, I turned to him. "You still with Lauren?" I asked him softly, and he nodded. "Then if you wanna keep it that way, stay away from Viper's Venom. They're trouble." I turned to Rose. "Please…_please_…if you even care about me a little bit, you'll keep Senna away from me."

Rose laughed. "Relax, brother-in-law."

"Relax? She has a whip!"

"Oh, damn," Mike murmured, grimacing. "Yeah, no…"

"My point exactly," I gestured to him and turned back to Rose.

"Well, they're meeting us in Buffalo to continue the tour with us," she said, shrugging a shoulder. "There will be a new photo shoot and a radio spot for promotion purposes, so… I dunno, Edward…bring mace."

"Or a suit of armor," I grumbled, smirking when they chuckled. "Fine, whatever. Can we go now?"

Tanya laughed, shaking her head. "Bet if it was Bella holding that whip, you'd change your mind."

Grinning her way, I shot her a wink, not saying a fucking word. She was probably right; my angel could tie me up and cover me in tar and feathers, and I wouldn't give a shit. Actually, the thought of Bella all in control and domineering sounded…hot.

Kate snorted into a laugh. "Look what you started," she chastised her girlfriend. "Poor Bella." She grinned at my salacious smile but waved me forward. "C'mon, guys. Tony's got the bus ready to head back to the hotel."

Emmett led us through the hallways, and we paused long enough to sign a few autographs and pose for a few pictures. The fans with the backstage passes, not to mention a few local news people, were staged just before we left out the bay doors. The fans, however, knew where we'd exit, and they'd gathered outside behind the barriers and security to catch one more glimpse of us as we got into the bus.

The group was laid-back, easy. They were excited about getting to see all of us together, so we gave them the time. The female fans asked for hugs and kisses and pictures. And it seemed we'd acquired younger fans, with Mike now in the band. The questions they asked were familiar, if not a little too much, but we were used to fans knowing all about us.

_Alec, when's your wife due?_

_Mike, is it hard being the new guy?_

_Guys, when does the DVD come out?_

_Masen, how's Bella? Is she going to join you on tour? _

I smirked, turning to face the person who'd asked the last question. It was a girl, and if I'd had to guess, she was in her teens. She shifted nervously, her face blooming red, when my gaze landed on her. She had glasses and was slightly on the chubby side, but had bright-blue eyes and a big, nervous smile. She simply held out her program for me to sign.

I took it, asking, "What's your name?"

"Donna."

Nodding, I scrawled an autograph specifically addressed to her, and before I handed the booklet back, I said, "She's good. And yeah…soon."

Donna grinned. "Good. We like her better than Heidi."

Laughing softly, I shook my head. "We?"

"Oh, yeah…your fans… Most of us are glad for you. You seem…happier. I can add you to the Facebook group…"

Snorting into a soft laugh, I posed for a selfie with her. "I'm… I don't do Facebook, Donna, but that's sweet. Thank you."

She was crimson when I hugged her again, finally giving a last wave to the small group. The fans crowded around the edges of the unloading area were screams and calls and chants, despite the cold weather and snow on the ground. We all waved once more before climbing up into the bus.

"Make a new friend?" Jasper teased.

"Aw, leave her alone," I said, grinning and shaking my head. "Donna was awesome…wanted to friend me on Facebook and everything."

He smiled and nodded. "Let me know how that works out."

Laughing, I kicked back into the seat and gazed out the window as we drove through Manchester. The hotel wasn't far, but with traffic from the show and the snow, it was a slow drive. When we pulled in to the hotel, we had to fight through more fans and media to get inside.

My ears were still ringing a bit as I tamped down my impatience with the slow elevator and its tinkling fucking music. We unloaded on the top floor, shooting waves at each other as Rose reminded us we needed to leave early in the morning to get on the road to Buffalo. Marcus was breaking down the stage and would drive overnight to beat us there.

Once in my room, I took a quick shower, then dressed in sweatpants and checked the tablet.

"Dammit," I groaned, shaking my head at the fact it was dead. I'd completely forgotten to plug it in to charge, but as I dialed Bella's cell, I figured it had worked out.

"Hey," she answered immediately.

"Hi, angel," I sighed in relief at just the sound of her voice as I propped myself up against the headboard. "Weather's bad, huh?"

"Yeah, but my Internet is back up."

I laughed. "Yeah, well, I'm an idiot. My tablet's dead. I guess I unplugged it when I charged my phone this morning."

Her giggle was sweet but short-lived. "It's fine. I just… I needed your voice more than anything."

I sat up straight. "What happened? What's wrong?"

"Aw, Edward…"

"Did my dad say something to you? Bella, I swear to God…"

"No! No, he didn't. It was me who couldn't keep my mouth shut."

My mouth fell open. "Oh, hell, baby… Talk to me."

"I know I promised I'd just check on him, but…"

She told me about her visit with my dad, about the short session with Dr. Cope. She also told me she'd lost her shit on Dad once they were alone, and I couldn't help but laugh at her protective nature.

"I love you." I chuckled, shaking my head.

"Really? You're not mad? Baby, I overstepped, for real!"

"Nah, if I learned anything from being in Dr. Cope's office, it's that it's better to get that shit out in the open," I explained, shrugging a shoulder I knew she couldn't see. "So he's almost done?"

"Yeah, I mean… He looked good, Edward – healthy and calm. He's supposed to see a therapist twice a week once he's out. He's still struggling with guilt, and I told him about your apartment, but I don't know if he's gonna take you up on it. Your mom still hasn't visited, but she's called. Though, I get the impression those phone calls didn't go so hot."

Sighing, I sat back against the headboard again. "She's mad at him over me."

"She's mad over being lied to, Edward, not to mention how her husband used their children."

"Aw, baby…we're grown men."

She laughed, and it was sweetest sound. "You'll always be her babies, no matter how old you get."

Grinning, I said, "I guess. So what's he gonna do?"

"I'm not sure. I told him what you'd said about the apartment and let him know I wouldn't be there between Christmas and New Year's, so I don't think I'll see him before I see you."

Groaning in want of her, I rubbed my face. "Jesus Christ, angel, that can't get here quick enough."

"No shit," she said through a laugh. "I'm missing you like crazy. My life is boring."

"No new woeful tales from poor drunk patrons?" I teased her.

"A few, but nothing all that interesting. A few cheating spouses, one empty nester, and poor Garrett heard all about a woman's trip to see her mother-in-law. No really sweet, really lost, gorgeous rock stars knocking me over…"

I felt my cheeks heat, but I laughed. "Good. That's my job."

"Indeed," she huffed dramatically over the line. "How'd the show go?"

"Good. Really good, actually. We're heading out early in the morning for Buffalo. Oh, I had a fan ask about you."

She laughed. "No…"

"Oh, yeah. Donna was a big fan. Told me she had a Facebook page and everything. Offered to add me and shit." I grinned at her laugh. "They like you _way_ more than Heidi."

Bella was still giggling when she said, "Oh, I bet that's the group Tori's a member of; she was showing me just the other day. They post some crazy shit, but the big deal was those pictures of us from Pike Place."

My head fell back to the pillow behind me. God, I missed that shit. I missed just being with Bella. I missed the easiness of us, the simplicity of it all. Being _on_ all the time was exhausting.

With that thought, I said, "Bella, you need to know… We're getting a new opening band. It's a group we've toured with before…Viper's Venom."

"That girl group? They're good…" Her voice trailed off. "Why are you telling me this? Is there… Did you…"

"Whoa, slow down, angel," I soothed her. "There's nothing bad about it; just one of them…sorta…kinda…has a crush. Or she did. Maybe it's over."

Bella barked a laugh. "But you're telling me in case I see something?"

"Yeah, they'll be meeting us at the next show, so new pictures and shit. I just didn't… Senna can be very…aggressive. Jake still has scars from one of them!"

Bella cracked the fuck up, and I grinned.

"Wow, it's like that?"

"Whips, angel!" I hissed in a whisper.

"D'aww, poor baby. You don't like being tied down and spanked, _Masen_?"

"_You_ can do whatever. Senna scares me."

"Well, Tori's dabbled in that lifestyle. I'll see if she's got a riding crop or something."

I laughed, though I had to adjust my fucking traitorous dick. "Figures. Is there anything she hasn't 'dabbled' in?"

"Um, no. Probably not."

Smirking at that, I sighed deeply as my body relaxed with every word spoken between us. Nothing beat these conversations. Ever. They were better than a cold beer or a hot shower. They were the best fucking thing to help me decompress after a show. The only thing that would make them better were if they were face to face. I never thought it could be this sweet, this fucking easy. As hard as it was being away from her, I was a grateful bastard for at least having this.

"I swear, when I see you, I'm not letting go the entire time you're with me." My voice came out raspier than I expected, but I couldn't help it.

"I'm kinda okay with that," she replied. I heard someone in the background, along with other noises. "Baby, I gotta go help Tori. A big group just came in from the hotel."

I glanced at the clock, realizing she was three hours behind me, so she'd still be working. "You in your office?"

"Yeah."

"Kiss that fan-fucking-tastic desk for me." I grinned at her groan.

"So not funny, Edward."

"No…it was far from funny but really damn hot."

She laughed. "Yeah… I miss you. Love you. Start a new game, 'cause I've got a long night ahead of me."

"I will. Love you, too."

**~oOo~**

"Ed," I heard from somewhere in the fogginess of my sleep. "Edward!"

I snapped up with a gasp, looking over at my brother. For a split second, I wasn't sure where the hell I was, but I rubbed my face and rolled over. We'd arrived in Manhattan in the wee fucking hours of the morning.

"What?" I mumbled, squinting in order to see him. He looked puffed up and pissed, but he looked worried as all hell, too. "Aw, fuck… What?!"

"We have a problem." He grimaced, shaking his head. "Actually, we have a bunch of problems, and I need you up to go over them."

"Shit, okay…" I groaned, getting out of bed and stumbling to the bathroom. I took a piss and washed my face, coming back in to get a really good look at him. "Jesus, have you slept?"

"Yeah, a few hours." He got up when there was a knock on the door. "I ordered food, 'cause I'm starving, and you'll want coffee."

Snorting, I waved him on, raking my fingers through my hair. Suddenly, a chill ran up my spine. If Emmett, not Rose, was here, then some serious shit was going down. I sat down on the sofa of my suite, waiting as he tipped the guy bringing food. Emmett rolled the cart over and took a seat in the chair next to me.

"Okay," I said, grabbing the coffee first thing and a piece of toast. My brother had ordered the whole damn menu, it seemed. "Spit it out, bear."

He sighed, picking up a fork and digging into a pile of scrambled eggs the size of my head. I stirred cream and sugar into my mug while he chewed.

"There's no easy way to do this…" He groaned, shaking his head. "Mom's asking Dad for a separation."

"Ah, hell." I rubbed my face. "Well, we kinda thought…" I started but stopped when he was shaking his head.

"That's not even the bad news. Dad…he kinda fell off the wagon."

My heart plummeted at that information. "Shit, was he even out a week?"

"Yeah, it seemed she hit him with the papers like the week he was out. But…" He held up his fork, pointing my way. "I have to give Dad props, for real. He checked himself back into Serenity. They called Rosie last night; she got the message this morning."

My eyebrows shot up at that. "Wha… Well, where was he staying? Bella hasn't said he'd shown up or anything."

"A colleague from the hospital had a garage apartment he was letting him use. I know you'd offered him your place, but maybe it was too soon to be by Charlie's?"

"Maybe," I allowed, shrugging a shoulder. "He also knew Bella wouldn't be there this week."

My heart pounded at that thought, and I glanced over at the clock. It was late morning for me, but it would be early for her. She'd be at the airport soon, due to the long-ass flight from Seattle to New York. I got up and grabbed my phone, smiling at the pictures of her luggage, her sweet face behind the wheel of her car, and then a shot of the airport doors. Her texts were just as adorable.

_I'm on my way!_

_You'd better not get me anything for Christmas, Edward. All I want is you._

I laughed at that one because it was too damn late. I'd already gotten her a gift, but I hadn't spent a dime on it, and Jasper and the boys had been helping me for weeks, not to mention Tanya was a huge help.

The texts changed, going from excitement to disappointment.

_Dammit, all checked in and now delayed!_

I glanced up at Emmett. "Her flight's delayed?"

"Yeah, that was another thing I was gonna tell you," he mumbled around a bite of eggs. "Depending on how late she's running, you may not get to pick her up. You'll have to be at Madison Square Garden for sound check and shit."

"Shit!" I snapped, quickly looking up her flight information. Fuck, if she wasn't still delayed. In fact, the plane she was taking from Seattle was coming in from San Diego at any moment, if it hadn't landed already, but it was damned late. "Goddammit, I promised her I'd pick her up! If this shit keeps up, she'll miss the show and everything!"

"Relax, we'll figure something out. Rose is keeping an eye on her flight. If push comes to shove, we'll send Tanya and Kate with Tony in the SUV to go get her at LaGuardia. They'll bring her straight to the Garden."

I felt like throwing something, but I sat back down and shoved another piece of toast into my mouth.

"Relax, dude. All this…isn't even the worst news," he mumbled, pulling out his phone and handing it to me.

"Fuck me to tears, Em! What else is there?" I asked him, but he merely pointed to the screen of his phone. It was a gossip site, and the headline was what caught my eye first.

_Wild Front Man of Radiant Eclipse, Masen, Seen Partying in New York_

My mouth fell open at the misconstrued bullshit I was seeing. It was me surrounded by the girls from Viper's Venom. Both Senna and Zafrina were with me, but so were Tanya and Kate and the rest of my bandmates. That party had been a promotional appearance for the tour put on in Buffalo by a local radio station, but that shit wasn't mentioned. It only showed the kiss that Senna had placed on my cheek. I shook my head at the frozen moment of time. It didn't show me pushing her gently away and asking her not to do that. It didn't show me telling her I was taken or her laugh and apology. Despite Senna's aggressiveness, she'd been rather cool about it all. She'd also moved on to Mike, but she'd scared him to death, so she'd given up.

No, it didn't show any of that because that wouldn't fit with _Masen_. I skimmed the article, shaking my head at how "sources" had said we'd left together, that we'd arrived at the same hotel together. Well, of course we did. Radiant Eclipse and Viper's Venom were staying at the same motherfucking hotel and had taken the same damn limo to that party. But again…this shit wasn't mentioned.

"Who did this?" I asked, my temper flaring.

"We're not sure."

"This was specifically written to make it look like…" I gasped, throwing him his phone and grabbing mine. I frantically scrolled for Bella, dialing her.

"Hey," she answered, and I grimaced at the sound of her voice. She'd seen it.

"Angel, you need to know…that wasn't…"

"I'm sure, Edward," she sighed, "but I can't talk. They're trying to get us on the plane."

"You're still coming?" I asked, simply because I knew what it looked like.

"Edward Cullen!" she snapped, and I shrunk under that tone. "Of course I'm still coming! If you think some bullshit article and manipulated picture is gonna stop me…"

I laughed out of sheer nervous energy. "Nothing happened, angel. I promise."

"I know." She sighed deeply. "Edward, someone sent me that article from a number I don't know, so it seems they wanted me to think there was more to it."

"What's the number, Bella?" I asked, my hackles rising, because someone was now fucking with my girl. They could post all the bullshit they wanted about me, but Bella was a completely different story. Heads were going to roll.

"I don't know; it's in my phone, though. And I have to go, baby. We'll talk about it when I get there."

"Bella, wait!" I yelled into the phone.

"Edward…" A laugh laced her sweet voice. "I can't _get there_ if you don't let me off this phone!"

"I know," I said through a chuckle, "but baby, your delay may mess with things, so if I can't pick you up, Tanya and Kate will be there, okay? They'll bring you straight to me."

"I figured," she said. "Love you."

"Love you, t…" I trailed off because she was already gone. I looked to Emmett. "Someone's fucking with Bella. And I wanna know_ who_!"

Emmett's demeanor completely shifted. He went into bodyguard and big brother mode in the blink of an eye…or the bite of eggs, depending on how I looked at it. His brow furrowed as I told him how someone had sent her the article.

"I'll go with Tony to pick her up," he stated firmly, glancing at the clock. "If she takes off now, she'll be late to the show, but we'll be back in time for me to get you guys off the stage and out of MSG." He pushed the cart closer to me. "Eat, baby bro. You guys are due for an interview on a talk show, not to mention I think Rosie's working on getting you guys on _Saturday Night Live_."

"Jesus," I snorted, pouring syrup on my pancakes and shaking my head.

"Fuck, you're in New York for a few days, so you might as well suck it up. You'll need all this shit not only to satisfy Aro, but it doesn't look half bad on your resume…if you know what I'm sayin'."

I nodded, shoving a bite of pancakes into my mouth. My nerves were shot. I needed my girl. I was worried about my parents. I wanted to know who the fuck wanted Bella to think I'd cheated. And we were busy as all hell today. I wasn't sure what more I could take.

**~oOo~**

The dressing room and outer hallways were completely different before a show than after. After a show, we'd bullshit and laugh, winding down from being pumped up. Before a show, we were all quiet.

Jasper would sit in a corner chair, picking softly on his acoustic, simply to warm up. Mike zoned out, twirling his drumsticks between his fingers. Alec would sometimes call his wife, but most of the time he'd sit silently with his eyes closed. Jacob _always_ called his dad, no matter where we were or what time zone we were in; he'd speak softly to Leah, but his call was to his father.

I tended to pace, usually in the hallway, my head filling with the order of the songs we'd play. I'd remind myself what town or state I was in. I'd push all the shit in my life out of my head and pull Masen to the forefront. I needed to stop worrying about my parents for the next couple of hours, forget about the media and the article that had been molded to look like something that it wasn't, and I had to stop panicking over the fact that I couldn't pick up my girl from the airport.

Emmett was already gone. He and Tony had left out of the Garden almost as soon as they'd dropped us back off and got us inside. Tanya and Kate had gone with them, simply because they were so damned pissed off about the article, they were going to tell Bella all about it. They had pictures and proof, and they'd just about attacked Senna when we'd come in for the sound check. In Senna's defense, it wasn't her fault; she was merely wrapped up in shit centered around me. Though, I was pretty sure Rose was head-hunting as I paced in the hall.

Viper's Venom was on the stage now, and I could hear their set just about to wind down. I took a deep breath, letting it out. I had to force it all out of my head. Music, just music. I shook my arms and rolled my head to crack my neck. When I stepped out on that stage, I wanted to give everything I had to the crowd. I wanted the new stuff to sound amazing, the old stuff to be like they remembered, and the whole damn thing needed to be a good experience.

I turned around to walk back down the hallway, only to come to a halt when Rose and Mike were standing there.

"What?" I asked, looking between them.

"She's landed, sweetie," Rose said with a laugh. "Now…you can relax, okay?"

Mike grinned. "Yeah, and don't you dare worry about that article. I left my sister a long-ass voice mail telling her what actually went down, and she'll get it when she turns the phone on. B loves you, man, so…let's go do what we do."

"Thanks." I sagged, leaning back against the wall. I rolled my head toward Rose when she walked to me. "I don't care what anyone thinks but her, you know that, right?" I asked her.

"I know," she said with a smile, cupping my face. "But _I do_. _I care_. That article was pure manipulation."

"It's no different than any other gossip rag, Rosie. The problem I have is…who'd send it to Bella? Who'd hide behind an anonymous phone number just to make sure she saw it? I don't think it was the people who wrote the article – I'm used to that crap – but someone was watching for something like that and made sure that _my girl _saw it!" I tapped my chest. "They can try to hurt me, but they won't get away with doing it to her!"

"I don't know. I'll be checking Bella's phone, though." She grabbed my face, squishing it a little. "I want you to shove all this out of your head, brother-in-law. All of it. This is Madison Square Garden, and I need Masen at his absolute best. This is New York City, and you've got a shot at _SNL_…I'm still working on it. But I swear to you, as soon as she's here inside this arena, I'll place her side-stage just for you. Okay?"

I nodded, taking a deep breath and letting it out. Rose smiled a little, nodding once.

Just before she walked away from me, she stopped. "Oh, yeah, and your dad? He didn't drink. He came _really fucking close_, but he didn't. He thought he'd better be safe than sorry and check back into Serenity."

My mouth fell open. "Seriously?"

"Yup." She nodded again, smiling with a touch of pride. "He apparently received the papers from your mom, walked to the closest bar, ordered a drink, and then froze. He called Dr. Cope."

"Wow." My eyebrows raised up, and my mouth gaped up at her.

"No kidding, wow." She laughed. "I'll be talking to your mom next. I'm kinda interested in just what she was thinking sending that the week he got out. Now…your girl is in town safe with Emmett. Your dad…he's getting there. Just…let it all go, Edward."

I nodded, shoving my earbuds into my ears and cranking the volume. I felt the bass, the lyrics, the scream of guitar throughout my entire system. I felt everything ebb away until there was nothing but me and the notes. Song after song played, until Marcus appeared with my guitar in hand. Rose took my iPod as the sound of the crowd caused chills to crawl over my skin. They were ready, and so were we.

I turned to face the boys. Jacob put his hand out in the middle, and we all slapped ours on top.

"Let's do it!" we chanted, following Marcus through the halls to the back of the stage.

The lights dropped down, the crowd roared, and Jake bounced on his toes. The whole place went black and the strobe lights burst on, hiding us as we took the stage. It was that moment. Those first few seconds that made all the bullshit worth it. The first notes from Jasper, the first beats from Mike, and the screams from every last member of the audience.

I was the last one on the stage, which only caused an even bigger uproar. Walking to the mic, I yelled, "New York City! Are you ready?!"

Grinning at Jasper at the reaction, I nodded, jumping up once, and as my feet met the stage, the pyrotechnics exploded, kicking us off. The crowd was electric, the songs were perfectly aligned with Marcus's lighting, and I lost myself to it all.

It was about the fourth song in that my heart simply _knew_. I could feel her eyes on me, despite the enormous crowd clawing and screaming at me as I ran from one end of the stage to the other. I took advantage of Jasper's guitar solo to sneak a peek at the side stage. I'd have laughed at my brother's shit-eating grin, at Tanya and Kate with their arms around the one person I'd been dying to see, but I couldn't. There wasn't laughter. Only pure relief at the sight of her.

I stalked to the side of the stage, not caring that I was dripping sweat, that my part was coming up. I just wanted to see her, touch her, make sure that the angel currently smiling my way was real.

My brother and the girls backed away, leaving Bella standing alone, and I reached out to pull her to me.

"Fuck, you're here," I growled against her lips, and she pulled at my face until my forehead met hers.

"And I'll be right here when you're done," she promised with the sweetest laugh. "I've got you for a week, _Masen_," she teased, kissing me once and lighting my whole soul on fire. "I plan on being very…_selfish_."

I laughed, simply because our little inside joke never got old. "Good. Don't fucking move that sweet ass from this spot, angel."

She giggled, pulling me closer. "Oh, yeah, and you want to know how I know that article was bullshit, despite your witnesses?" she asked, pointing to her brother and then to Emmett, Kate, and Tanya, who looked busted. When I shrugged, she said, "Because when _I_ kiss your cheek, you blush, Edward."

Smirking, I nodded but pointed at her as I raised an eyebrow her way. "Not one fucking inch, Bella. I mean it!"

I ran back out onto the stage to finish the show that now had the best audience on the fucking planet. I gave them everything, because when I left that stage at the end, I had catching up to do with my girl.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Yay! She made it…and yes, the song Masen wrote for his angel will tease for Sunday's update. ;) Smusic did an amazing job…seriously. Carlisle had a setback, but he pushed through it, though he's back in Serenity. And Esme's still…floundering, is the best word I can come up with, since there's more there than meets the eye. I decided to give Edward and Bella their reunion all in one chapter, so that'll be in Edward's POV next.**

**There weren't really questions, just some cheers for Bella coming to Edward's defense to his dad. Some cheers for Renee pushing past her hang-ups to be there for her kids. Some impatience over Esme. Oh, and lots of fun with Edward and Bella's chats. ;)**

**ADF (A Different Forest) asked me to be their spotlighted writer, which was very sweet. I answer a few questions for them, and when that goes live I'll let you guys know. ;)**

**The video and pics will tease Friday or Saturday, and all the links are on my profile. We'll see you guys again for Sunday's update. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	19. Dear God

**A/N… As you can tell by the chapter title, those of you that guessed "Dear God" by Avenged Sevenfold can pat yourselves on the back. ;) In all reality, the song and the real video inspired this whole fic. BUT… Smusic made the most phenomenal video for this story, and it's currently up on my YouTube playlist.**

**I'll let you guys get down to the nitty-gritty of the reunion. ;) See me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 19 – Dear God**

_There's nothing here for me, on this barren road  
There's no one here while the city sleeps  
And all the shops are closed  
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you  
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah_

_Dear God, the only thing I ask of you_  
_Is to hold her when I'm not around_  
_When I'm much too far away_  
_We all need that person who can be true to you_  
_I left her when I found her_  
_And now I wish I'd stayed_  
_'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired_  
_I'm missing you again, oh no..._  
_Once again_

_Some search, never finding a way_  
_Before long, they waste away_  
_I found you, something told me to stay_  
_I gave in, to selfish ways_  
_And how I miss someone to hold_  
_When hope begins to fade..._

_"Dear God" – Avenged Sevenfold_

**EDWARD**

I shut the shower off, grabbed a towel, and quickly dried off. Wrapping the towel around my waist, I tried to slow down and give Bella a minute or two with her brother in the next room.

The show had been one of our best since we'd started the tour. I was pretty sure I owed it all to the beautiful girl just outside the bathroom in the dressing room. The very second I set eyes on her, everything that had piled up on me faded away, leaving me free to give my all on the stage. Radiant Eclipse had ended up giving two encores.

Now…the night was free. We'd be in Manhattan for a couple of days before we took off for Columbus, Ohio, finally finishing out the old year in Nashville. I'd have Bella for little over a week. She'd fly home to Seattle from Nashville the first of the year. I wouldn't see her again until well into February, when we'd come home for our first tour break.

With another towel, I dried my hair roughly, turning when I heard the bathroom door click. Smirking, I said, "Angel, I was trying to give you time with Mike."

She grinned. "He needs a shower, too. How you guys don't completely sweat away, I'll never understand."

Laughing, I shrugged, my eyes staying on her as she walked to the vanity. "You get used to it, I guess."

She perched herself up on the counter, holding her hand out. "Towel."

When I handed it over, she reached out and tugged me closer by my hand. She draped the towel over my head, gently drying my hair the rest of the way. Once she was done with that, she dabbed at the droplets of water still clinging to my chest and stomach. Her fingers raked through my hair, and she smiled up at me when she deemed me dry, finally wrapping herself all around me.

"God, I missed you," she breathed into the crook of my neck.

I hugged her fiercely, simply giving in and lifting her off the counter. With my face buried in her neck, I whispered, "I never thought we'd get here. Fuck, I…"

"I'm sorry about your dad and that article. I'm sorry I had to rush you off the phone."

Grinning into her neck, I pulled back, pressing her into the closest wall. "Shut up, Bella," I said with a chuckle. "You're here. You didn't tell dad anything he didn't need to hear, and that article was just…the norm, baby. I'm used to it. And the phone, well… I survived just knowing you were getting on the plane to me." I kissed her. Hard. I wanted her so badly that I could barely see straight, but I needed to get her out of Madison Square Garden, and I needed to ask one thing. "Did you…" I licked my lips, taking a deep breath to control my desires and my temper. "Did you give the phone number to Rose?"

"I did," she replied, reaching up to trail her fingers down my jaw. "Then she called her uncle."

I nodded. I'd figured Rose would call Jenks. "Okay, then I'll let her deal with it, because dammit, I wanna know who sent that to you."

Bella kissed me to shut me up. "Yeah, well…not tonight. I haven't seen you in weeks, and I've missed you, so…Mr. Cullen, you're gonna have to let me be all sorts of _selfish_." She grinned when I pressed a growling kiss to her lips. "In fact, this, right here, is a damn good start."

I felt my cheeks heat at the fact that she was still wrapped around me, that I was pressing her up against the wall.

Her giggle was mixed with a moan as she cupped my face. "Oh my damn, I missed that blush!"

I found myself being kissed into complete oblivion. My hand slapped hard against the wall by her head, and I melted into her. Tongues reunited, and my hips surged forward. Bella's hands wandered everywhere – my hair, my shoulders, my back – all while her legs stayed wrapped around me tightly.

"Edward," she groaned, and I hummed against the skin of her sweet neck. "Baby, please…"

I pulled back, licking my lips, only to bite down hard on my bottom one. "We gotta _go_." Her laugh made me grin, but I stopped for a moment, nuzzling her nose with my own. "Okay, okay, okay… I would be an asshole to take you straight back to the hotel, angel. So…we're in the Big Apple…together…and it's Christmas. You said selfish, but fuck, Bella, I'll take anything at this point. We'll do anything you want."

Bella smirked, but her eyes were dark as she slipped a hand between us. "Can't exactly go out in public with this problem you're having, Edward."

I huffed a laugh, and my eyes rolled back as warm, light touches teased the edge of the towel around my waist, only to drift down to where I was fucking aching for her.

"Bella…angel…" I moaned, pulling her from the wall and placing her sweet ass back on the vanity. "I wasn't…this isn't…" My forehead fell to hers when my towel fell to the bathroom tile in a puddle at my feet. Despite how much I'd missed her, how I was still pumping with adrenaline from the show, I hadn't wanted to attack her the second we were alone, but damn it all, she felt too good, just perfect. "I can wait. I just…"

Warm, wet kisses met the skin of my neck, leaving a trail of fire, until her lips were at my ear. "Selfish, baby," she reminded me in a sexy-as-hell whisper. "I love that you want me this much, Edward, so let me help you."

Her hand wrapped around my cock, and a hiss escaped me as I nodded against her forehead without thought. There wasn't a chance in hell I could tell her no at this point.

"This okay?" she asked with her lips barely leaving my ear. "Or more?"

"No, no…it's okay… It's fucking awesome, actually," I panted, my eyes squeezing closed.

Her words, her touch, just the fact that she was right there after so damn long, was skyrocketing me toward the abyss. I wouldn't last, which might have been the method to her madness. She was taking the edge off. She knew me better than I even knew myself. And it was that thought that had me at the point of no return.

"I love you, I love you… So close, Bella… I…"

My breathing faltered as my forehead fell to the crook of her neck. Bella dropped kisses to my shoulder, my jaw, smiling against my skin when a shudder racked my entire frame as she cleaned me up with towel next to her.

"Better?" she whispered.

Nodding vehemently, I kissed her neck, cheek, and then her mouth. "Yeah," I sighed, a lazy smile curling up on my face. "I'm not anywhere close being done with you, angel, but at least I can think."

She laughed softly. "Let's get you dressed, and we'll go from there. Tony said he's ours to use tonight, so…"

Smiling, I nodded and let out a deep breath of relief that I could at least see straight. "All right. Let me get dressed, and I'll get us out of here." I pulled on my jeans, a long-sleeved shirt, and a hoodie, knowing it was freezing outside. "You'll have to bear with us, angel," I told her, grabbing my leather jacket. "We still have to see the fans with the backstage passes."

Bella shrugged a little and smiled. "Whatever…"

Once I was dressed, I helped Bella down from the vanity, and we stepped back into the dressing room. The guys were all cleaned up, but Rose was waiting for us.

"I sent that number to Uncle Jay," she said, her brow furrowing. "And Senna said to tell you she's sorry. She didn't know."

"I know." I waved off Senna's apology. "What'd Jenks say?"

"He's checking the number now…said he'd know something by morning." When I nodded, she turned to face all of us. "Boys, you've got the backstage pass holders still to see, but try to behave. You have one out there…he's probably fourteen, fifteen? Anyway, he's in a wheelchair, and he's super-excited. This show is a part of his Make-A-Wish, so…"

My eyebrows shot up at that, but I turned to Tanya. "We got anything?"

"Yeah, we can come up with something." She dove into a box by the door. She came up with one of Radiant Eclipse's posters, a couple T-shirts, and a handful of little stuff – keychains, stickers, and CDs.

The poster was the key, so I took it from her, pulled it out of the plastic sleeve, and unrolled it on the closest table. "Guys, get over here. Come sign this thing."

We passed around the Sharpie, each of us scrawling our autograph by our image on the poster. Tanya set a bag down, and a pair of drumsticks appeared in front of me. Smiling, I took them from Mike, putting them in the bag.

"All right, c'mon," I told them, but I looked to Bella, who stepped back to stand next to Rose.

"I'm okay. Go on," she said, smirking my way.

Nodding, I followed Emmett out of the dressing room door to the waiting area for the backstage pass holders. It was the normal meet-and-greet, with autographs and pictures. The kid in the wheelchair seemed to wait patiently, and I was almost certain he was sick with cancer. He was wearing a bandana and baseball cap like I did on stage occasionally, but his face and arms were vacant of a single hair, so I could guess his head was, as well. There was a breathing tube underneath his nose attached to a tank on the back of his wheelchair.

These were the tough parts, the things that made me feel like the shit I did made a difference, but then they also broke my heart. To think that this kid's _last fucking wish_ was to see us, meet us…that was tough to wrap my head around. It also made me want to do shit the right way, make this last wish count for something.

"Masen," he said, his voice soft, but his eyes were bright.

I shook his hand, kneeling next to the chair. "What's your name?" I asked him.

"Denis."

"Well, it's good to meet you, Denis. You enjoy the show?"

"Aw, yeah," he gushed, smiling. "I had awesome seats! Being in this thing," he said, tapping the arm of his chair, "put me almost in the front row!"

Grinning, I handed him the bag with all the stuff in it, showing him the poster. And I gave a sharp whistle to get the guys' attention. We spent the next few minutes taking pictures and talking with his parents. Apprently, Denis had leukemia, which had been in remission for two years, only to come back with a fucking vengeance. They weren't sure if the chemo would kick it again, but they all seemed hopeful.

When we were done, I turned to Rose. "Find out his hospital and then send a donation toward his bills. Do it from all of us," I told her, gesturing to my bandmates, and Jasper nodded in agreement.

"Already did it," she admitted with a smile. "The bus is ready for you guys, and Tony's pulled the private car out back for you two."

I nodded in thanks. I'd wanted time with Bella to myself. There would be plenty of time to spend on the bus once we left New York, but our first night, I wanted to spoil her, even though she probably would've been just as comfortable in a damn cab.

Emmett led us out toward the bus, and Tony was waiting for Bella and me with the back door of the black car open. Rose reminded us of schedules – when we were leaving, when the next interview was, and the fact that we had two days of downtime – but she also reminded us to keep our phones close, just in case we were needed anywhere. I was pretty sure she was still hoping for _Saturday Night Live_,but I wasn't holding my breath. It would have to be that very week or not at all, simply due to scheduling conflicts.

I waited until Bella was seated before following her in, and Tony shut the door behind us. Once he was in the driver's seat, he turned to us.

"Masen…where to?"

"Do you have bags?" I asked Bella.

"I've already deposited them in your room," Tony answered for her.

"Damn, busy much, Tone?" I teased him, smiling at his deep chuckle, but I turned back to Bella. "Where you wanna go, angel? The best food on the planet is right here – hotdogs, pizza, Chinese…"

Bella laughed but shrugged. "I don't care."

I turned back to Tony. "How 'bout that pizza place you took us to the last time?"

"It's in Brooklyn," he warned.

"I'm pretty sure we don't have anywhere to be, man. Go for it."

"Yes, sir," he said, and I smirked when he raised the barrier between us.

I sat back as soon as the car started to move, only to grunt when a petite brunette planted herself on my lap.

"Hungry?" she asked in a whisper, but her eyes were dark, fiery, and filling with an emotion I could totally understand.

"Fucking _starving_," I whispered, my hands gripping her ass and pulling her closer. Unfortunately, that action caused the most delicious friction as our jeans rubbed together, and I moaned against her lips. "And not for food, angel."

I grinned at her sweet laugh. God, I'd missed that sound in person.

Bella's hips shifted, grinding down onto me, and my eyes rolled back. That sweet pussy was obviously needy, seeking more and more. Without thinking, I rolled us, laying her out on the leather seat.

She looked like every damn dream, every rock video, or every damn movie about someone famous in the backseat of a fucking car. Part of me wanted to fuck her stupid back there, only to see if she could keep quiet. Another part of me knew it was cliché and stupid. But she was so fucking hard to resist, especially as her hands pushed my jacket off my shoulders at the same time she was dragging those amazing lips up my neck.

Pinning her hands playfully above her head, I dropped my forehead to hers. "You want selfish, Bella? I can give you selfish… I believe it's my turn, anyway."

I could tell she didn't know whether to laugh or beg, but I didn't really give her a choice. Keeping her hands in one of mine, I slipped the other down her body, between her breasts, until I finally reached the button of her jeans. I deftly popped open the button and slid down the zipper. I was going to give Bella selfish.

"Let's see just how much you've missed me," I taunted, lifting her shirt just enough that I could see her ink, her stomach, and a new bellybutton piercing. "Cute," I said with a chuckle, toying with what looked to be a little music note.

She laughed breathlessly, her head falling back a little, and she struggled to pull her hands free. "Edward…"

I let go of her wrists at the same time I slipped my hand inside her jeans, beneath what felt like something silky and lacy. Biting down on my bottom lip, my eyes flickered between her stunning face and the place where my hand disappeared. She was wet and hot and swollen, not to mention clenching a little at my touch.

"You _did_ miss me."

"Oh God, so much…"

Brushing light kisses across her lips, I whispered, "Then let me make you come, angel. Take it. All of it." Despite the tight jeans, my fingers slid easily inside her, and the sexiest moan erupted from her. I used the heel of my hand to rub against her clit, curling my fingers. "I love you, baby. Let me do this for you. Let go. Just take."

Fuck me, I'd missed her sounds, the feel of her, the smell of her. I'd missed how she reacted to everything I said and did to her, but mostly, I missed how she made me feel like a damned hero, especially when my name hissed out of her against my lips.

Grinning at her orgasm-bleary eyes, I nipped at her lips, but I couldn't resist the taste of her as I licked my fingers clean. My goal was to drink from the source before the night was over, which apparently I said out loud, because Bella smirked as she straightened her clothes.

"Like I said, lucky landlady," she teased, and we both slipped down in the seat face to face as Tony drove through the city.

**~oOo~**

I slipped out of bed when there was a knock on the door. Bella barely stirred, but I knew her well enough to know that she'd be starved when she finally woke up. I pulled on a pair of athletic shorts, grabbing my wallet.

The girl standing on the other side of the door gaped up at me, her eyes raking over my ink, then my face. Holding my hand out to sign for the food, I waited patiently. Once she snapped out of her shock, I scrawled my name across the line and then tipped her.

When I turned around to roll the cart inside, Bella was standing there, wearing nothing but my shirt from the night before.

"You kill me dead, angel. I swear," I sighed, shaking my head.

She smiled a little, pulling her hair from her face, but then she pointed toward the door. "She'll be ruined now."

Grinning, I rolled my eyes. "She'll get over it." I smiled at her chuckle and guided her back to bed. "C'mere, baby. This won't be as good as your cookin', but we'll have to suffer."

I placed the cart next to the bed and crawled up to the headboard, patting the space between my legs. Bella joined me, her back to my chest, and we ate quietly.

The night before had turned out better than I could've hoped, simply because the stress leading up to Bella's arrival had been utterly ridiculous. Now that she was here, I wanted every moment to count.

After I'd made her come silly in the back of the private car, we never stopped talking or kissing. It was catching up, it was my come-down from the show, and it was just…everything. Tony had found us a pizza place open late, and he'd watched over us as we gorged ourselves huge slices. I told Bella what she'd missed concerning my dad, which seemed to make her sad, until I told her he hadn't actually taken a drink. And her eyes darkened at my mother's timing of serving separation papers.

By the time we made it back to my hotel, it was late and we were tired but unable to keep our hands off each other. I'd started kissing her in the backseat, then the elevator, barely making it inside my room before my need for her became overwhelming. I wasn't sure the door had fully closed before clothes started to come off and demands were blurted out against lips. We'd been selfish, indeed. And neither of us had a complaint.

The only thing not discussed was the text to Bella's phone and the upcoming week when she'd travel with us. Though, leave it to my girl to approach it first thing.

She turned in my arms, a bowl of fruit in hand, spearing a piece of melon in order to feed it to me, and I cradled her in my arms. "Okay, rock star... How's this touring thing work?"

Chuckling, I chewed and swallowed, only to press a kiss to her forehead. "If Rose can't get us on _SNL_, then we'll be leaving New York as planned day after tomorrow. If she does, then everything moves back a day."

She nodded, taking a strawberry and then offering me one.

"Either way, we'll spend Christmas Day here tomorrow. We have an early TV show that morning."

Bella smiled. "Then what?"

Grinning, I raised an eyebrow at her. "Then, you get to board the magic bus, baby."

Her giggle was adorable.

"It's long hours in the damn thing, especially since we're heading to Ohio next, but we stop for gas and food…and sometimes both, depending on what we eat," I teased her, shrugging a shoulder when she scowled. "Oh, angel… It's a bunch of guys, and the only things that keeps us civilized are Rose, Alice, Tanya, and Kate. Otherwise, it would be this…rolling man-cave."

"Oh," she groaned. "Maybe I should go home."

Grinning, I nipped at her neck. "I wouldn't blame you." Pulling back, I smiled down at her. "Not one bit." She laughed and shook her head, and I added, "But we make the best of it. We try to leave each other alone. There are games and TVs, and occasionally Jasper and I will write music." I shrugged a shoulder. "Anyway, we'll head out early the day after Christmas. It's not your normal bus; there are big seats and tables. It's more like a stupid-expensive RV. You can sleep or kick back if you want. I'm so used to it, baby…" I shrugged again, taking the bowl from her and setting it back on the cart so I could hold her closer. "As fantastic as I just made all that sound, I'm glad you're here."

Giggling, she kissed me, her fingers raking through my hair that I was sure looked crazy. "It's Christmas, Edward…you should check on your parents, especially since you'll be busy tomorrow."

My forehead thumped to hers and I nodded. "I know. I just don't know which one to start with: my mother, whose timing with her papers sent Dad into a downward spiral, or my dad, who checked himself back into Serenity?"

She grimaced, cupping my face. "Maybe find out Esme's side before you talk to Carlisle?" she suggested, and I sighed deeply, not moving a muscle, because it wasn't exactly a secret I wanted her again. Just having her in my arms, in my hotel bed, made me want her again.

"Bella…"

Her laugh was ridiculously cute as she sat up straight. "You call, and then you can do anything you want."

I hummed, licking my lips and narrowing my eyes at the gorgeously dissheveled thing in my lap. "Anything?"

"Anything."

That word sat between us for a moment. "Alrighty then," I sang, reaching for my phone on the nightstand as Bella's laugh shook us both. I unplugged my cell, calling my mother first, wincing a little at the time back in Seattle, but she was usually up early.

"Are you calling to yell at me, too, Edward?" she answered.

"Uh, no, Mom… Merry Christmas?" I said, though it came out like a question because she sounded pretty pissed off.

"Oh, sorry, champ."

"Who's yelled at you?"

"Who hasn't?" she countered but then sighed deeply. "I fired my damn lawyer."

"It _was_ piss-poor timing, Mom. What the hell?"

"_I know_!" Her sniffle over the line broke my heart, and I wrapped an arm around Bella, who had shifted so that her back was to my chest again. "That wasn't how it was supposed to happen, Edward. I swear. Someone at my lawyer's office messed up. They weren't supposed to send those papers. They were written up as a possible…thing, but they sent them to your father by mistake. I would _never_ have done that…especially _when_ they did."

Frowning, I pressed my lips into the back of Bella's head. "You… You're leaving him." It came out sounding like an accusation more than a question, and I sighed.

"Son, I only had those drawn up as a precaution. I swear. I'd asked your father for time, and he's been ever so gratious about it, so the papers were unnecessary."

"Have you even _seen_ him?" I asked, my voice raising, and Bella turned in my lap, giving me a kiss to the cheek. She got up, pushing the cart back out the hotel room door.

"No, I haven't," she answered. "I can't. Not right now."

I rubbed my face in frustration and sadness because I honestly couldn't take sides and I could see where she was coming from, but I didn't have to like it.

"You should at least hear him out," I said tentatively. "I'm not saying you _have_ to, but you should hear his side. At least then, it would be…an informed decision."

My head fell back to the pillows behind me when my mother was quiet on the other end.

"Maybe. I just…I can't understand how he could've done that to you, Edward. To our boys."

Nodding, I sat up. "Your 'boys' are grown men, Mom. Big enough to take care of themselves. And had we wanted to, we could've told him no. Be angry at us, too. Be angry at Rose for bearing witness to it all. Hell, be mad that dad got behind the wheel, but fair is fair. We all f—messed up."

I knew I'd hit the nail on the head when she changed the subject. My mother and I were alike in a lot of ways.

"Where are you? New York, right?"

"Yes, ma'am," I answered her.

"Bella's with you?"

"Yes, for the next week, actually."

"Good. I'm glad. You could be worse places for Christmas, Edward," she said with a chuckle. "There's the tree in Rockefeller, ice skating, shows at Radio City…"

Laughing, I sighed. "I know. We're planning on getting out and about today."

"Good. I want you to have a good time. And be safe, sweetheart. Merry Christmas."

We ended the call, and I dropped the phone to the bed as Bella walked in from the bathroom. She'd given me a few minutes of unnecessary privacy, but I opened my arms for her.

"Oh, no…mister, you've got another call to make," she sang, grinning at me. "Plus, I need to call my mother anyway."

Smirking at her, I picked my phone back up. Calling Serenity was a pain in the ass. I was usually on hold for a bit, and he could only talk for so long once they got him for me. Although, the view while I waited was absolutely fucking stunning.

Bella paced, still wearing nothing but my shirt from last night. Bare, smooth legs, messy hair, and those dead-sexy nipple rings I could see through the fabric of my shirt. My eyes raked over and over from her feet to her head as she talked to her mother.

"No, no…I made it okay. My flight was delayed a little, but I'm good. They got me there for the rest of their show. I missed the beginning, but the end is always better anyway." She caught my stare, grinning and rolling her eyes at me. "Mike is amazing on stage. I'll have to get Rose to send you some of their video footage." She paused, shaking her head. "No, he looks great. Happy. Tired, but happy."

Her mention of video footage reminded me that I needed to give her something. Reaching for my tablet, I found what I was looking for and then set it aside.

"No, he's good, too, Mom," Bella said, still pacing.

My hand was about to reach out and touch the bare skin of the back of her leg when my dad finally came on the line.

"Hello?"

"Merry Christmas, Dad," I told him, smiling at his chuckle.

"Hey, champ. Where are you?"

"New York."

"You could be in worse places." He chuckled, and I shook my head at how alike my parents were…and how stubborn. "I didn't drink…"

My brow furrowed at how he felt he needed to clarify, but I said, "Oh, I heard. I'm… Good job, actually. I'm proud of you."

"Thanks, Edward. I just… I wasn't ready."

"If you aren't, you aren't." I shrugged a shoulder, simply because I'd been in Serenity with people who never felt "ready" to face the world. It was scary as a completely sober person, so I couldn't imagine having to relearn everything. "I talked to Mom."

"Yeah? She's okay?"

"She's pretty pissed at her lawyer. You weren't supposed to be served," I explained. "It was a great bigfuck-up. But…I dunno, Dad. She's…"

"She's your mother, son. So just…give her time." He sighed deeply, sounding tired. "And don't get in the middle of it. Not one of you. This is my mess. You've been put in the middle enough. Got me, champ?"

"Yeah, Dad. I hear you. I just… Where were you staying? I mean…you could've…"

"Remember Dr. Webster?"

"Yeah, the orthepedic doc, right?"

"Exactly. He was Emmett's doctor when he was hurt wrestling. Well, he had an apartment come up and offered it to me." Dad groaned a little. "Though, now I told him to rent it. I don't know when I'm…"

"My offer still stands, Dad. Guilt-free. You'd actually be doing _me_ the favor." My eyes drifted to Bella, who was still talking quietly with her mother.

"How's that?"

"You promised me you'd check on Bella…"

"The bar's so close, though, son."

"I sincerely doubt the bartender would serve you, at least not without handing you your ass first."

Dad laughed. "She told you, huh?" I grinned and hummed yes, but he went on. "That's one tough cookie you got there, Edward. Boy, I thought for sure she was gonna punch me." When I laughed, he did, too. "She's um… She really cares about you, son. Don't mess that up."

"No, never," I sighed over the phone, but my eyes drifted to Bella again. Her sweet smile, her obliviousness to my stare, and her happy face… It made my chest hurt with how much I loved her, never mind how much I _wanted_ her right at that moment. And I knew the next week, despite the long hours in the bus, would fly by. "Just…think about it, Dad."

"I will, Edward. I'll let you know. My time's up, though, son. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Dad."

I set the phone back down on the nightstand, glancing up when Bella ended her own call. She sounded content with her mother, something that surprised me, but Bella had told me how her mother had been there for her almost the second I'd left on tour. I was glad. I could tell my girl had been barely holding it together in that room before I got on the plane. Though, I hadn't been much better.

Her eyes were dark as she walked back toward the bed.

"You said…anything." I smirked, opening my arms for her.

She crawled up the bed, laughing at me. "I did. Didn't I?"

"Mmhm," I hummed, spinning her back to my chest and picking up my tablet. "So…first things first. Your Christmas present." Bella looked over her shoulder at me, and I teasingly placed my hand on her face to turn her back around, my lips at her ear. "Remember that song I was writing? The one I wouldn't let you hear or read the words to, angel?" I whispered, closing my eyes and nuzzling the soft spot behind her ear when she nodded. "I believe you called me… What was that?"

She giggled, her head falling back to my shoulder, and I hugged her closer with one arm. "Temperamental artist."

"Ah, yes. That. Well, that may be true, baby, but… Really, I was writing it for you," I admitted, dropping a kiss to her cheek. "Jasper wrote the melody, but the words are mine. We sort of…cleaned it up, and then we put something together for you. Tanya made the video."

I tapped the screen to play it and smiled against Bella's shoulder when it started. Occasionally Jasper and I would record ourselves to test a song, so it wasn't anything new, but Tanya had taken some backstage videos of us fooling around, piecing together a pretty damn good video. It was fun, but the words meant everything to me.

It was technically a prayer, and it had started the night Bella and I had had our first date. It was me, begging God to hold her when I couldn't. It was the weight of my impending tour, the distance that would be between us, and the guilt for finally finding someone like her, only to have to pick up and leave her. It was all those things with my love added in for good measure. It spoke of how tired and lonely I was without her, how selfish I felt, and at the time, I hadn't even left yet, but as we'd recorded it, it couldn't have been more honest. Fuck, I'd missed her the second I'd left her. And without shame, it would be going on our next album – the one that Aro would never touch.

Bella giggled at our silly antics – playing football in empty parking lots, getting ink, getting ready for shows, and even some live stuff. But the words caused tears to flow down her face. When it was over, she spun in my arms, wrapping me up in an almost choking hug.

"That was… I loved it! You really wrote that for me?" she rambled against the skin of my neck.

I pulled her back, smiling up at her as I wiped away her tears. "I really did. You're quite the inspiration, angel," I whispered honestly, brushing my lips over hers. They were soft and a bit salty from her tears. "It's going on our next album."

Bella's mouth fell open. "No!"

"Yes," I said with a laugh. "It absolutely is, Bella. Jasper liked the slow ballad, I liked the acoustic sound, and we made the girls cry. We'll probably boost it up a bit with a heavier sound when we finally record it, but…" I shrugged a shoulder. "It's a sure thing."

Her lips pressed to mine roughly and more tears spilled out of those beautiful eyes, but she whispered, "You're not selfish for doing your job, Edward." She pulled back, swiping at her face. "How many times do I need to show you exactly what 'selfish' means?"

Grinning, I felt my face heat, and I tilted my head up at her. "Every-damn-day."

She smiled, looming over me. "Selfish is wanting to hear that song again…only live."

Chuckling at her, I shook my head as my hands slid softly up the outside of her bare legs as she straddled my thighs. My moan was shameless when I found more smooth skin and that gorgeous ass of hers. I cupped it, kneaded it, watching in fascination as her eyes darkened, her breathing faltered, and her tongue snaked out to drag slowly across her bottom lip. Gathering my T-shirt she was wearing, I pulled it off over her head, revealing pure, unadulterated bare Bella.

"Turn around, angel," I whispered against her lips. "Face the other way."

Before doing what I asked, she reached down to pull my shorts off, tossing them off the side of the bed. She moved to straddle me, take me inside, but I stopped her.

"Just wait, baby," I chided against the smooth skin of her shoulder, only to stop long enough to trail my tongue along the inked swan on her shoulder blade. "You want it live… I'll give you live."

I pulled her back to my chest, thinking this was the best audience I'd ever had – or ever would have in the damn future. This sweet, sexy, strong thing on my lap who was practically vibrating with every word whispered, every kiss pressed, or every touch that met her skin. My hard cock was trapped between the small of her back and my stomach as I did exactly as she asked. I breathed the words of her song into her flesh, imprinted them with my hands along her ink, and willed them to be true as my fingers toyed with steel rings and the swollen, achey part of her that had her breathing my name as her head fell back to my shoulder.

I continued to sing the song only for her, directly into her ear as she fell apart in my arms. My song, my voice faltered, finally just meshing into a long, slow, pitiful moan when I lifted her just enough to guide myself inside her from behind. She was wet and warm and everything I wanted and some things I didn't know I needed. And somewhere in the back of my head, I knew I wanted to show her off to New York at some point, but right then…I was perfectly content to spend the rest of the day showing her how much I'd missed her.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… One person guessed that there was some error on Esme's side of things. Nice job. There was. Esme's still quite stubborn, but it's messy all the way around. Edward was right, though; if she's mad, she should be mad at everyone. But…it's hard to see it that way when "kids" are involved. ;)**

**We pick back up on tour with Bella next chapter. ;) Her side of how things are…**

**Again, the gorgeous video that Smusic made is on the playlist, and as usual, all the links for everything is up on my profile.**

**A Different Forest was sweet enough to spotlight me, and I answered a few questions. If you're interested, the link is added to my profile, as well. :)**

**No questions, just some anger over Esme – though, now we know that wasn't her fault – lots of pride in Carlisle, and cheers over Edward reunited with his angel.**

**I'll see you guys again Thursday for the next update. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	20. Wherever I May Roam

**A/N… Okay, back to the tour. We pick up with Bella this time. I'll let you get to it, but see me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 20 – Wherever I May Roam**

_...and the earth becomes my throne  
I adapt to the unknown  
Under wandering stars I've grown  
By myself but not alone  
I ask no one_

_...and my ties are severed clean_  
_The less I have the more I gain_  
_Off the beaten path I reign_

_Rover, wanderer_  
_Nomad, vagabond_  
_Call me what you will_

_But I'll take my time anywhere_  
_I'm free to speak my mind anywhere_  
_And I'll never mind anywhere_

_"Wherever I May Roam" – Metallica_

**BELLA**

Glancing up from the book I was reading on my tablet, I gazed around the bus. As bad as Edward had described it, it really wasn't horrid. Sure, we were all packed in there, but it was quiet. We were all doing different things, staying out of each other's hair as scenery dusted in snow drifted by out the windows.

Alec was stretched out along the back seat, eyes closed, earbuds in, listening to what was most likely classical music – something he and Edward had in common. My brother and Jacob were playing a video game up toward the front of the bus, and they were talking quietly into headsets as they blew up something or other on the screen. Emmett was sitting up front while Tony drove. Alice and Rose were sitting at the table, laptops open, gazes fierce, and nimble fingers on keyboards. It seemed those two never stopped working. The seat right behind Tony was occupied by Kate and Tanya, who seemed to be watching a movie on a tablet while cuddled adorably together.

Jasper was kicked back on the long seat across from me, acoustic guitar on his stomach and his legs stretched out. His feet were crossed at the ankles, and he was the epitome of laidback at the moment. Edward, however, was sitting at the end of the bench I was on. His long legs were stretched out in front of him in the walkway, while he, too, had his guitar in hand. Though, when he wasn't playing, his fingers would skim over the skin of my feet and ankles as he kept them on his lap.

It was interesting to watch the dynamic between the two. They were so different in so many ways. Edward was a furrowed brow and a set jaw when they wrote or tested music, where Jasper was lazy smiles and what came across as indifference, but it wasn't. It was far from it. Edward was dark, intense, with his ink and fierce gaze. Jasper was light hair and eyes, easy to laugh, and he let things roll right off him. They complemented each other so well with their differences that it gave me an understanding as to how the band truly worked. They were Radiant Eclipse's heart and soul. They were the music, the words, and the drive. Edward pushed Jasper to write better, more complex riffs, while Jasper kept Edward from taking shit too seriously.

Christmas in New York had been amazing and so different than anything I'd ever experienced. I remembered my dad traveling around the holidays when I was young, but I'd never gone with him. With Edward, it had been fun and easy, despite the lack of the traditions that usually came with the holiday.

We'd spent most of Christmas Eve inside the hotel room. I couldn't say I regretted a single minute. I didn't feel I'd missed out on anything, simply because I'd missed him so damn much. We'd finally ventured out into the city in the late afternoon to at least say we'd seen New York at Christmas. We wandered around Midtown, taking silly pictures next to several sights – the tree and ice skating rink in Rockefeller, the New York Public Library, and Radio City Music Hall. We'd wandered until our feet hurt, and then we'd grabbed a cab back. We'd barely been recognized, simply due to the big, bustling city, but when we were, the people were excited and polite, gracious when Edward would stop to sign an autograph or take a quick picture.

There had been no _Saturday Night Live_, though Rose and I seemed more disappointed than the boys. The show's people, who had been interested in having Radiant Eclipse on, decided to go with a different musical act. They'd invited the boys back for another show, but it would have to wait until the schedules could mesh better.

Christmas Day was the last day we'd spent in New York. The guys had had an interview and small performance on a talk show early that morning, and Rose had treated us all to Christmas dinner at a restaurant where she'd booked a private room. We'd gorged ourselves on the traditional foods, exchanged presents, and laughed until we were all hoarse.

My gaze raked over Edward's form, landing on the gift I'd given him. It was a watch, masculine and chunky, shiny and sexy. It had been worth every penny I'd paid for it, simply because his face had lit up bright and happy when he saw what it could do. It showed more than one time zone, and I'd set one to Seattle time so he'd always know what time it was at home.

Home.

I sighed at the thought, tearing my gaze from the sweet man who was rubbing my feet as his mind worked out notes and rhythms to gaze out the window. It hadn't taken long, though nothing about our relationship had, but I realized it didn't matter if it was a hotel room, the bus we were in at the moment, or our apartments back in Seattle… Everywhere was home when we were together. We were comfortable and easy. We relied upon each other, laughed and played, not to mention we loved. Hard.

It made me wonder about our future, made me consider decisions I never would've thought about prior to Edward coming into my life. I wanted to figure out _us_. I wanted to make Edward happy but keep some sort of normal in contrast to what he did for a living.

My tablet was tugged gently from my grasp and set aside. Grinning up at what seemed to be a cuddly Edward, I opened my arms for him. He draped himself on top of me, his head on my stomach, and my fingers immediately sank into soft hair as his chest settled between my legs.

I pressed kisses over and over to the top of his head as I continued to glide my fingers through his soft locks. I thought he'd fall asleep, but he shifted a little, setting his chin on my stomach. His eyes were soft green, mixed with a touch of gray that was coming in through the windows.

"Are we driving you crazy yet, angel?" he asked softly, grinning when I raised an eyebrow at him.

"That happened way before setting foot on this bus, Edward," I told him, smiling when Jasper snorted softly across the way.

His eyes were closed, and he'd set his guitar aside, but he cracked open one eye to look my way. "Completely understandable, darlin'."

Pointing at him but looking to Edward, I smiled. "See? Too late."

Edward's cheeks reddened, and I groaned internally. God, I loved that. It was so damned sweet, but it didn't stop me from wanting to do wicked things to him. And I would have…if we hadn't been on that bus. All the naughty things I wanted would have to wait until we checked into our hotel in Columbus.

"No," I sighed deeply, leaning in to kiss his forehead and finally answering his question. "You aren't driving me crazy, baby."

Edward shifted again, and this time he slipped between the back of the seat and me, propping himself up on an elbow. He looked skeptical as he gazed down at me.

"You're awful quiet," he noted.

I laughed softly, reaching up to trail my fingers along his jawline. I kissed him briefly. "Shut up, Edward. I was just thinking."

He smirked but waited patiently.

"I want to…" I trailed off, my gaze dropping from his, only to fall to the ink on his strong forearm. My fingers followed each swirl, each picture, all the way up until it disappeared into the sleeve of his black T-shirt. "I'm trying to figure out what I want to do…with this, the bar, _you_."

Edward sighed deeply, but I had to kiss him for not panicking. Since the beginning, he'd been worried that I'd run from it all. And while I understood his trepidations, simply due to his past, I had to keep reassuring him that I was in…permanently. It seemed to be working.

He leaned in, kissing the tip of my nose and then my lips. "Any conclusions, baby?"

"No," I said with a laugh, which made the sweetest smile curl up on his lips. "I know we need to discuss it…_in detail, Edward_. But…I don't know. There's…" I sighed a little, shaking my head. "There's a part of me that wants to say 'fuck it all,' and pick up roots and stay right here, but I know I can't. As much as I'm enjoying this, being with you, traveling, it's not me."

"I know," he agreed firmly, and again, I could see he wasn't scared, just very serious. "And I couldn't do that to you, anyway, Bella."

"But…" I urged, kissing him lightly. "I also know I don't need to tie myself down to the bar. I don't _need_ to work, but I chose to, simply to keep my dad's memories alive. Things have picked up a little since your video, but I'd love to release some of the responsibility of it all in order to have more freedom. I honestly don't know, Edward. There _has_ to be some sort of middle ground, a happy medium to it."

He was nodding slowly as I spoke. "We'll figure it out, angel. I promise. I've fucking loved having you with me the last few days. But I'm not blind to how grueling it can be or will get as the tour goes on…and on and on." He smiled a little. "I also know that this will be the toughest tour, and it's the last one under Aro. The next one, we can pretty much do as we please." He sighed deeply, shrugging a shoulder. "If we can…survive this one, angel, then we probably can survive anything. Of that, I'm abso-fucking-lutely sure."

"You two should do what Carrie and Alec did… Well, before she got pregnant," Rose piped up. She grimaced when we looked her way. "Sorry, I just…couldn't help but overhear." She gestured a finger around the bus. "Before Carrie got pregnant, she'd travel with us off and on. And what I mean by that is, through her job, she would receive two paid weeks of vacation a year, so with those two weeks, she'd travel. She'd meet us wherever we were and then do it again when the next vacation rolled around. You…" She pointed to me. "You have more freedom than that, so you could essentially visit anytime you wanted. Hell, we could fly you out about halfway through each leg, which would be two more times after this one, if that's what you wanted. Here," she said, clicking the mouse of her laptop. "I just sent you the entire tour schedule down to the minutes."

Edward and I sat up, and I grabbed my tablet. Edward shifted us until I was leaning against him with my back to his chest as I scrolled through my e-mail. He set his chin on my shoulder as I studied the itinerary for the next seven months.

Seven damn months.

The thought made me sigh deeply, not to mention squirm closer to Edward and nuzzle his scruffy cheek.

"What?" he asked, his arms wrapping around me.

I shook my head, trying to figure out how to word the question, finally just blurting it out. "What would change? After you're done with Aro? What would be the difference between this "— I held up the tablet—"and a different tour?"

Edward's mouth opened, but it was Rose who answered.

"Less stops," she stated firmly, shaking her head. "I always thought Aro was an idiot for all these shows. I get it. We have the fan base, and most shows sell out, but fewer cities with bigger venues would be better. It would reach the same areas, but it would cut the cost of the stage crew. It's expensive as all hell to roll out the stage, equipment, and the crew to every city. Even worse when we go overseas. It's fuel, travel expenses, and salaries, not to mention insurance for workers and vehicles. We make that back with each show sold, but at what cost? These guys, by the end of the tour, are fried. They're tired. If we cut a handful of shows out of each leg of the tour, they'd perform better, the road crew could take their time, and we'd still come out on top. Aro doesn't see it that way. He only sees the money that's rolling in. He doesn't see that he's burning them out."

I gazed around the bus to see most everyone listening, my brother included.

"Bullshit," Jasper muttered, sitting up a little. "He sees it; he just doesn't care."

Edward's lips were at my ear. "What do you _want_ to do, angel?"

Grinning, I turned and kissed his jaw. "Not move from this spot. Ever." His chuckle shook us both, but I held up the tablet. "When I get home, I'll show this to Tori and Garrett, and we'll figure out the best dates, okay?"

I knew there was more to that question than just the current tour, but I honestly didn't have the answer. We really did need to sit down and figure it out, but it wouldn't be until their contract with Aro was over. However, Edward accepted that, opting to drop kisses to my cheek and neck.

"Speaking of Aro," Rose sighed, shaking her head and turning her laptop around. "He's probably going to be upset with your little Facebook friend, Edward."

Edward laughed, turning her way. "Aw, Donna was cool. What'd she do?"

Grinning at Edward's sweet defense of his fan, I looked over at the computer screen. Apparently Donna had friends _everywhere_ on that page. There were pictures and videos from the shows they'd already finished. There were also pictures of Edward and me out and about in Manhattan, and those made me smirk up at Rose.

"They love you," Rose said with a laugh, pointing a finger my way.

"Or they really hated Heidi," I countered with a chuckle. "I'm just greener grass."

Edward barked a laugh, but we both sat up to look. The threads on the Facebook page were filled with praise of the shows, not to mention how excited they were that I'd showed up on _Masen's_ tour. Apparently Masen looked sad up until Christmas.

Rose held up a finger, smirking a little as she changed to a different page. "What's funny? The gossip sites are completely the opposite. They have their 'sources' who say you're still with Heidi, but they also can't deny seeing James out with her in public."

"Too bad you didn't find out who texted my phone," I told her, wrinkling my nose.

That whole thing was still a mystery, though every last one of us had our suspicions. Rose's uncle had called back just after we'd left New York to let us know that the phone number traced back to a pay-as-you-go phone bought with cash in Seattle. That was it. Nothing more. I assumed it was Aro, just because he probably had access to my information more than James or Heidi, but we couldn't say for sure. Someone had wanted me to see that article, that picture of Senna and Edward. Someone wanted me to doubt him, and that wasn't going to happen.

Jasper sat up, eyeing the screen, only to reach over and click back to the fan page. His grin was slow, lazy, and easy. "You know, your buddy doesn't do a half-bad job on this thing, Edward."

Edward laughed, but he nodded. "How's she _my_ buddy?"

"'Cause she's _your_ fan, doofus," Rose answered with a laugh.

I scrolled down the page, nodding a little. "You know…_these_ are the people who count. They're the ones going to shows, buying T-shirts and music. They're the ones you should cater to." I tapped the screen, looking between Edward and Jasper. "They're your media. Yours. You should give them everything – time, pictures, interviews. They count. Not those vultures who stalk the corners, printing lies."

Edward's brow furrowed a bit, but he nodded. "And they would say exactly what they see… Hell, they already are. Look."

He pointed to a few posts here and there. They were pictures that fans had taken with him or other members of the band. Some were excited, and they talked about how nice they were or how busy, or even what they were out doing.

"That's true, B," Mike agreed easily. "But you gotta watch some of them. While most just…talk about the shows or meetings, there are some…not-so-sane ones. They're obsessed."

My eyebrows rose up high. "Okay…" I dragged out the word.

My brother laughed. "You forget I was a fan first. I've seen some crazy shit on some of those pages. Girls who claimed they'd slept with these guys; girls who said they saw them doing stuff, though they had no proof. Guys who said they got into a fight with Masen or pulled Alec off their girlfriend. It's all crap. Delusional, too."

Alec laughed from his spot at the back of the bus, as did Edward in my ear, only he added, "I'm a lover, not a fighter."

I placed my hand on his face playfully, pushing him away with a laugh. "Yes, but it does fit the _Masen_ persona."

He merely shrugged as he laughed at me. I rolled my eyes at just how much he didn't care about that stuff, but I met Rose's gaze, and she smirked a little, like she was thinking it over. But I sat back in the seat, lifting my tablet and running a gossip site search. I wanted to know exactly what they were saying.

I went back a few months, shaking my head at pictures of myself doing various yet completely boring things – working at the bar with Garrett, shopping, coffee with Tori… Hell, even driving in my car. The paparazzi became bored with me when they couldn't catch me doing anything nefarious. There were a few articles that focused on Edward – or really, Masen – that spoke of the new album and the new tour, but one or two tried to make more out of his being out in public than it truly was, like the party in Buffalo with Senna kissing his cheek. I wanted to see what these so-called "sources" were saying…exactly.

Rose sat down beside me, sandwiching me between Edward and her and gazing over my shoulder. "See a pattern yet?"

I snorted humorlessly but nodded. "Oh, yeah. I notice when it's about Edward, they skirt the truth. The whole Senna thing… Of course they left together! You all did. Of course they arrived at the same hotel. You all were staying there. They leave out just enough of the truth to make it sound…dirty. So my guess is there aren't really any sources, this shit's just skewed to make it look a certain way." I flipped over to another screen, a different article, and this one was about Heidi and James out and about. "This bullshit, on the other hand…that's ridiculous. This picture clearly shows them together. Body language can show you they're attracted to each other, but the article is how they're 'leaning on each other over Masen's betrayal.'"

I rolled my eyes so hard that I was damned sure I sprained an eyeball, but I shook my head. "This isn't all Aro's doing. This is James, too, but he's using Heidi to do it."

Rose nodded, smiling a little. "Yup, that's my guess, too, because James is still in deep shit. Legally, he still can't say much, but I guaran-damn-tee you, he's letting Heidi's people leak specific statements. Those 'sources' are probably her assistants. We stopped her at the show at Charlie's, but we can't stop her in public. Heidi never signed a non-disclosure statement outside the original video, which was idiotic…" She trailed off, eyeing Edward with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm aware…_now_, Rose," he snarked back.

Grinning, I nudged him with my elbow. "Need me to sign one?"

"Fuck, no!" he grumbled, shaking his head. "In fact, I'd fear for whoever tried to make you spill a damn thing."

The whole bus broke into laughter over that one, but he had a point. It wasn't exactly a secret that I had no patience for the media.

Shrugging, I turned back to Rose. "I love how they've painted me this…_other woman_. And that Heidi and I have had words. Other than the day of the video shoot, I haven't spoken to her. And neither of them have crossed the threshold of my bar."

Rose sniffed, her face serious. "Let's hope it stays that way. You're using the security company I gave you, yeah?"

"Mmhmm," I hummed, nodding a little. "They stay until closing."

"Good," Edward grumbled. "Keep it that way."

**~oOo~**

_Masen, any plans for the New Year?_

_Masen! Bella! How's it touring together?_

_Mike, is it difficult being the youngest member of the band?_

_Bella, how long will you be traveling with Masen?_

"Everyone, back up!" Emmett snapped, seemingly impatient with all of them as he tried to get us from the bus to the hotel.

Between Emmett and Tony, they were a wall of defense that couldn't be breached. Security wasn't really Tony's thing, but due to his size and his longevity with the band, he did it anyway, if only out of loyalty. They did it at restaurants, gas stations, at the shows, and at the hotels. They'd get us inside safely, without having cameras and microphones shoved in our faces, not to mention fans overstepping their welcome or rude assholes who felt the need to prove something by picking a fight with one of the band members over who was in line for coffee first. The latter was something that happened more often than I'd have thought, but with Emmett's and Tony's presence, not to mention _Masen's_ stone-cold glare, the jerks usually backed down.

We'd just arrived in Nashville. It was the last show I'd see before going back to Seattle. Due to weather and traffic, we'd gotten there with just enough time for everyone to clean up, eat something, and get over to the arena for sound check.

Columbus had been fun. Radiant Eclipse had played to a sold-out show. Masen and the boys had worked the crowd into a frenzy. Even Viper's Venom had come out onto the stage to play with them – something they were considering doing again because the fans had liked it. And considering tonight was New Year's Eve, they wanted to give them something extra.

The thought of Senna and the rest of the members of Viper's Venom made me smile, simply because they truly were…different. Senna had apologized to me profusely about the picture of her and Edward – or Masen, really – saying that he'd been nothing but polite, that she didn't know which rumors to believe, and she'd promised she meant no harm. She was also well aware that her lifestyle wasn't something Masen was interested in, but she'd said a girl could dream. I liked her, if only because she was honest. She also had a guy she'd been leading around on a leash, so it seemed she'd moved on.

Emmett guided us through the hotel lobby and into the elevator. Edward was quiet, but he tended to get that way before a show, I'd noticed. And being pressed for time wasn't helping matters.

Once we were inside our hotel room, I eyed him for a moment when he simply said, "You can have the first shower."

No "angel," no smile…nothing.

"Is this a preshow thing, Edward Cullen? Or do you think you could at least look my way?" I asked him, sounding just a touch snarky, but he'd been pretty snippy for the last few miles of the ride. When his shoulders sagged, I added, "Or is this the same thing you pulled on me when you were packing to leave?"

He fell down onto the edge of the bed, glaring at the floor, and I knew I'd nailed it. Walking to him, I forced his gaze to meet mine.

"It's our last night, Edward, but not _the_ last. Nothing about this trip has scared me or swayed my opinion. Is that what this is?"

That beautiful blush colored his cheeks, along with a flash of his sweet, nervous half smile. Slowly, he relaxed the fists on his lap and wound his arms around my waist. Sometimes he was too easy to read.

"You know what scares me?" I asked into the top of his head as his forehead pressed to my stomach, but he pulled back to look at me. "The band's eating habits. That's some scary shit."

He grinned. "We don't exactly have a choice, angel."

There he was, back with his sweet tenor.

"That tour bus has a fridge. Try storing more than beer and sodas in there. An apple won't kill you. Hmm?"

His cheeks tinged pink again as he nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

Cupping his face, I asked, "You know what else scares me?"

His brow furrowed when he shook his head.

"This…this grumpy thing you do when we're about to separate. You did the same thing at home when packing, getting all prickly when I was trying to help you. Stop it. I don't like it, and it's not necessary. I hate it, actually. It's like you're pushing me away so it won't hurt. It's gonna hurt, but that is some _Masen_ bullshit right there. Edward wouldn't do that to me."

Deep, contrite green gazed up at me, framed by a heavy brow. "I don't know if I can let you go," he said so softly that I almost had to read his lips.

"You have to," I whispered back, brushing a light kiss over his mouth. "I have responsibilities at home, baby. And you'll be home in six weeks."

"Only to leave again."

"Then, I'll take what I can get. And you will, too, Edward." I sighed deeply at the fear and the worry. "We'll survive this tour, baby. You said so yourself. There is light at the end of this tunnel. I've seen Rose's plan for you guys once you've severed from Volturi records. The tour would be say…thirty shows, instead of sixty. That's _way_ easier to deal with."

"I…I'm sorry," he groaned, reaching for my face and pulling me in for a heart-stopping kiss. "I've liked having you with me… I just…"

"Selfish," I teased against his lips, which turned up into a smile as he nodded. "Good. You can be as selfish as you want, but you also have to be practical, Edward." I pulled back to hold his handsome face in my hands. "I wasn't prepared for you, you know." I raised an eyebrow at him. "And this," I said, gesturing between us, "is the best thing, the best feeling. Ever. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, but it came out of left field. We can figure out a sense of normal, baby. And if this…me joining you every couple months, living for phone calls, video chats, and online games, is our normal, then I suppose we'd better get used it, but that includes having to let each other go, if only to promise to see each other again soon."

"Love you, too," he murmured, smirking up at me. "So…nothing scared you off?"

"Not enough that I won't do it again," I vowed, squishing his face until his lips were all pooched, so I planted a loud kiss on them. "One day, I'm gonna leak a picture of this shit to the Masen fans. Your buddy, Donna, would eat it up!"

He cracked up. "Shut up, Bella."

Letting go of his face, I backed out of his fighting grasp. "Now, you have a show to get ready for, and your fans don't want you all grumpy. And then you've got a New Year's Eve date with your girlfriend, Edward, so I suggest you get your sweet ass in gear."

He pushed off the bed, and I didn't move quickly enough. I suddenly found myself tossed over his shoulder.

Clothes were quickly and roughly removed between heavy, deep kisses. The steam from the shower fogged up around us as we stepped under the spray. We knew we didn't have a lot of time, but neither of us voiced it. Hands gripped and soaped up skin, shampoo made us slippery, but nothing felt as good as when Edward lifted my leg and set it on the side of the tub, only to slip into me from behind.

My head fell back as I groaned with the delicious tug he was giving my hair, never mind what his free hand was doing to my nipple piercings and eventually my clit. I came so damn hard, and he wasn't that far behind me. He came with a string of curses, declarations of love, and I was pretty sure I heard another apology in there.

His breathing was heavy as his forehead fell to my shoulder. "Yeah, so not done with you, angel. I don't think I'll ever be…done."

My head fell back to his shoulder, and I turned to kiss his neck, lapping up the droplets of water clinging to his skin. "Good to know, Edward."

His chuckle shook us both, but he sighed deeply. "We'd better get dressed."

**~oOo~**

I stepped out onto the stage, shaking my head at how intimidating it was to gaze out at all the now empty seats. The show had been amazing, one of the best, but I tended to say that every time I watched them perform.

The guys were cleaning up and tending to the fans with the backstage passes. I found myself wandering the arena.

Marcus was busy starting to pack everything up. My brother's drums were already in their cases and being rolled to the trucks, along with every amp, cord, and guitar case.

"You okay, B?" I heard behind me, and I turned to smile at my baby brother. He looked tired but so very happy. "What'cha doing out here?"

"I was just…staying out of the way," I said with a shrug but then pointed around the enormous empty space. "It doesn't scare you? All those people…being in front of them show after show?"

He laughed, shaking his head. "Oh, yeah. It scares the shit out of me…until the music starts. And then… Well, I don't really see them as much as the other guys. I'm not up front, you know?"

"You're happy?" I asked him.

"Very." He came to me, wrapping his arms around me. "Are you, B? Are you happy?"

I nodded, standing up on my toes to kiss his cheek. "Very."

"Good, 'cause that's all he worries about, you know," Mike whispered, his brow wrinkling as he jerked a thumb behind him toward the back. "He's not _anything_ his stage presence portrays. So…don't you dare believe anything you read. That guy…he's all about you, B. And that's the truth. If he wasn't, if he was any different, I'd have handed him his ass ages ago."

I laughed but hugged my brother hard. "Thanks, Mikey."

"Mmhmm," he hummed against my head. "Now, let's get out of here before Edward thinks you've run away."

We turned toward the back stairs of the stage to see Edward standing there.

"I wouldn't blame her if she did," he said through a chuckle.

"Well, obviously you don't know how stubborn my sister can be," Mike countered. "B, Edward…Edward…Bella…" he introduced mockingly.

I poked his side at the same time Edward reached for him, but he darted around us and rumbled down the stairs, laughing on his way. I shook my head slowly at my little brother, eyeing Edward. He was out of his stage clothes, wearing worn-out jeans, a gray thermal shirt, and his leather jacket. His hair was still damp from his shower. He looked like _my_ Edward again – normal, sweet, and loving. Masen had been washed away the second he'd yelled, "Thank you, Nashville! And Happy New Year!"

Masen gave his all on the stage. After attending a handful of shows now, I clearly could see that much. He'd pour sweat, blood, and soul out into the audience, giving them all he had inside. He'd take that couple hours of show time to be free, to express everything from love, to hate, to politics, to fictional stories. They were in every word, every note, and every drop of sweat each member of the band had within them. He'd let go of everything just to make sure the fans were happy. I couldn't imagine how exhausting that was.

My brow furrowed, and I glanced back out over the empty arena seats.

"Angel? You okay?"

I nodded, leaning back against him when warmth and leather surrounded me from behind, not to mention sweet kisses pressed to my cheek and then my lips when I turned his way. Suddenly I understood where his cranky mood had come from prior to the show. He'd told me more times than I could count just how much he needed me to come back to himself after a show. And even though I knew I needed to get back home, if only to figure out what to do with my schedule, my bar…fuck, my _life_, I hated leaving him.

I also knew we were supposed to go out with everyone, to celebrate New Year's, but I couldn't share him. I just couldn't.

Spinning in his arms, I molded myself against him. My arms wrapped around his waist beneath his jacket, and I inhaled the scent of him, that perfect _guy_ smell – leather, aftershave, and soap. It was Edward perfection. It was the scent that was slowly fading away at home – his car, his apartment, and sadly my apartment. I wanted to bottle that smell and douse every inch of my life with it, if only to keep his love, warmth, and sweetness around me twenty-four-seven.

"Angel…Bella, what's wrong? You… You're kinda freaking me the fuck out." He hugged me back, burying his face in my neck.

My giggle shook us both, only because he was just awkwardly adorable sometimes. "I love you," I mumbled into his chest, and when he whispered it back against my skin, everything came spilling out of me. "And I wanna be selfish with you, and I don't wanna go out, and I don't wanna go home tomorrow… But I know I have to, but…but…and I'm sorry about earlier…"

I could feel Edward's smile, his light chuckle. "Shhh, Bella. I needed my head pulled outta my ass." He shifted a little, pulling back and cupping my face as he shook his head slowly. He seemed to be eyeing me for a second but then pressed his lips to mine briefly. "Look at me, angel," he said firmly, but his eyes were warm, green, and sweet. "I've… I'm…" He licked his lips, biting down hard on the bottom one for a second before finally forming the words he wanted. "Dammit, Bella… You've given me back…_me_. I know you think Masen and Edward are the same, but I don't always feel that way, baby. It's harder to reconcile here." He tapped his temple. "Especially when I'm out here, doing what I do. But what doesn't change is that…you're… You're it for me, Bella. So…whatever it is that you want…I'm in."

I brought his face to mine and pressed a hard kiss to his lips. I could truly hear what he was saying, and what he wasn't, but it wasn't the right time for it.

Swallowing nervously, I met his warm, concerned gaze. "I've been trapped in that magic bus as you called it for over a week, Edward. I've seen, heard, and _smelled_ more than I should have." He grinned, but I went on. "And as much as I adore my baby brother, I want to wrap myself up in you until I have to get on that plane. 'Cause once I'm home, I'm swear to God I'm gonna figure out how to trudge along until you come home, until I meet you back out in the world again, and how _we can survive this_."

"We will," he vowed, sounding much more confident than when we were in the hotel. "I hate being apart, but…this…us… It's just everything to me."

Smiling, I kissed him again, only to squeak when he scooped me up into his arms.

"C'mon, angel. We'll go be selfish," he growled sexily against my lips, smiling into the kiss when I laughed.

I knew that this time the next day, I'd be back in Seattle. Reality and responsibilities would come crashing back down on me. I wasn't kidding him; I really did want to change things at the bar, but I had to talk to some people first. As Edward toted me through the halls of the arena, I absorbed every second, every touch, and every smile and kiss, if only because I'd be without them for almost six weeks.

We could do this; we had to.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… We're going to stick with Bella next chapter. **

**For those of you that follow my blog… It's on hold temporarily. I don't update it; Jenny does, and she's out of commission for a bit. In fact, keep her in your thoughts because she's been pretty sick. **

**No questions this time that I can answer. Most of you were simply happy our couple was together, though that can't always be. I do my best not to drag it out. ;)**

**Okay, the pics and playlist are in their usual spots. Next update is Sunday. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	21. The Price of Evil

**A/N… I want to thank all the well wishes sent Jenny's way. She's back home and much better! :D **

**We're back with Bella again. This chapter ran long, not that many of you will complain, but I'll let you get to it.**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 21 – The Price of Evil**

_Dragged ya down below  
Down to the devil's show  
To be his guest forever  
(Peace of mind is less than never)  
Hate to twist your mind  
But God ain't on your side  
And old acquaintance severed  
(Burn the world your last endeavor)_

_Flesh is burning_  
_You can smell it in the air_  
_Cause men like you have_  
_Such an easy soul to steal_  
_So stand in line while_  
_They ink numbers in your head_  
_You're now a slave_  
_Until the end of time here_  
_Nothing stops the madness,_  
_Turning, haunting, yearning_  
_Pull the trigger_

_You should have known_  
_The price of evil_  
_And it hurts to know_  
_That you belong here, yeah_  
_Ooh, it's your fuckin' nightmare_

"_Nightmare" – Avenged Sevenfold_

**BELLA**

The stack of papers and mail and receipts on my desk was scary. They overflowed out of my inbox, cascading to the desktop. Glaring at it with hate, I then sighed in defeat. I knew it needed to get done before my shift tonight. Otherwise, Tori and Garrett wouldn't get paid, the lights would get shut off, and my bar would close.

Snorting at that last thought, I tried to find something bad in that, and my aching heart couldn't do it. I missed Edward too much, and I'd only been back home a few days. My mother had picked me up from the airport, much to my surprise, but we'd stopped for dinner on the way home. I'd had an amazing time on tour with Edward, despite how cramped and nerve-racking it was. I wanted to go back. I wanted him home. I wanted anything that involved making time fly by in order to see him again soon. However, the reality was that I couldn't.

Now, reality was staring me in the face, stacked up in a mountain. And reality sucked. Hard.

With a cup of coffee in my hand and my hair pulled back from my face, I turned on some music, opened my laptop, and sat down at the desk in my apartment to get to work. I was working on my ledger when my phone bleeped. I smiled down at a message from Edward.

_I want you back. No one cuddles as good as you do._

I had to laugh…and tease him back, just because he was so silly sometimes.

_Well, don't cuddle with my brother. He kicks in his sleep. He has since he stopped sleeping in his crib._

_Is that why I woke up with bruises?_

_No, those were from me. ;)_

_Oh, yeah…_

The phone rang, and I giggled when I answered. "If you snuggle with Jake, I want pictures."

His laugh was loud and a beautiful sound over the line. "Not a chance, angel. If you think Taco Bell is a bad idea when he's awake, then just imagine how bad it is when he's sleeping."

"Eeew, Edward!" I groaned and laughed at the same time. "You know, that entire trip blew the whole _rock gods_ image out of the water. I saw things no one should see." I shook my head slowly because that was no lie – men would scratch, burp, and fart for hours if unsupervised.

He chuckled softly. "Yeah, I bet. I miss you, angel."

"Me, too. My desk looks like a hurricane flew through it, though." I sighed, leaning back in my desk chair. "And the pile doesn't seem to be getting any smaller," I grumbled, ignoring my work for a moment. "Where are you?"

"Um, North Carolina? Or maybe it's South… I'm not sure," he replied, and I could just about see him in my mind – hand in his hair, glancing out the bus windows in order to figure out where he was without asking. "Oh, South!" he proclaimed, sounding very proud of himself.

Giggling, I shook my head. "Fuck, I love you."

"Love you, too, angel. I just wanted to hear you laugh. I'll let you get back to work."

I glanced up at the clock. "Yeah, I've got so much to do today, but…we'll see how motivated I continue to be."

"Okay, baby," he said softly. "I'll call you from the hotel room."

We ended the call with the usual declarations of love, and I got back to work. The numbers were bugging me, where they never did before. But I kept the bar open in my dad's memory, and now I wasn't so sure it was the smart thing to do. Despite the fact that Radiant Eclipse's video filming had been shot there and business had picked up a little, I was barely breaking even. Just as I was tossing my pencil down in frustration and in victory that at least all the bills were paid, there was a knock on my door.

My eyebrows shot up at who I saw through the window, but I smiled when I opened the door. "Mrs. Cullen," I greeted Edward's mother.

She tsked at me, wearing a sweet smile. "Esme, Bella…please."

"Esme," I agreed with a smile back, opening the door wider. "Come in, please. Coffee?"

"That would be lovely. Thank you."

After taking her coat and hanging it up, I grabbed my mug from my desk and turned off my stereo, pouring us both some coffee. I sat down across from her and noted she looked nervous as she stirred sugar into her cup.

"Are you okay?" I asked her.

She smiled before tearing her gaze away from her cup. Nodding, she said, "I…I'm… Well, first, I know you just got back, so I just… How are my boys?"

Grinning, I nodded. "They're good. Busy and tired, but very good. It was fun traveling with them for the week, but goodness, I don't know how they do it all the time."

Esme laughed softly. "Me, either. I've joined them once or twice but never for very long. It's exhausting to watch them." She met my gaze, her smile falling a little. "I try not to pay attention to those gossip shows, but…" Her nose wrinkled a little. "Are you… Is everything…"

"It's fine. Edward and I are really…good," I promised her. "Don't pay those things any attention. I'm not quite sure that the band's record label doesn't skew those things a certain way. Here…" I got up from the table and grabbed my phone, scrolling to my pictures from my trip. "Here's what it was really like. Just swipe to the left…"

It was funny to watch her face as she seemed to drink in the sight of her boys. There were pictures from New York and Christmas, the shows I'd watched from the best seat in the house, not to mention silly pranks and laughter on the bus, and even some of Edward and me playing around with selfies and silly faces. I did manage to capture Edward's squished face, which I threatened to leak out to the Masen fans of the world, and the next picture was a blur when he tried to grab my phone away to delete it. He didn't succeed, if only because he was so easily distracted with kisses and touches.

"My God," she whispered, shaking her head as she pressed a hand to her heart. "I…I'm… Edward looks…_so happy_."

Tears welled up in my eyes, as did hers. "I hope so," I barely got out with the lump in my throat. "He's um…" I swallowed thickly, smiling a little. "He's amazing." I laughed when she held up my phone, showing a picture of his sweet grin as I kissed his cheek.

"That's my boy," she stated proudly. "That's what he was like when he was little. He was full of laughter, teasing his brother until Emmett would tackle him in the yard. He was light and free, like a spring breeze. And music… God, Bella… The music flowed through him. I couldn't keep a piano instructor for him. He surpassed them all." She shook her head as she wiped at her tears, thanking me when I offered her a napkin. "His father and I never wanted the band, but…" She smiled my way when she handed me back my phone. "They obviously knew better."

She was quiet for a moment, and I was wondering if we were getting close to what had brought her to my door. She sipped her coffee, finally meeting my gaze.

She seemed to debate something silently but finally said, "I went to see Carlisle." When my eyebrows shot up, she smirked a little, and I could see where her boys got it. "Family day," she added with a nod. "We are…far from reconciliation."

Wrinkling my nose, I nodded sadly. "How is he?"

"Good," she sighed, "and just about to try leaving again, which is why I'm here, Bella. He says Edward okayed him to stay at his place."

"He did," I hedged, shrugging a shoulder.

"You sound…tentative."

Chuckling, I nodded. "Not… Not for the reasons you're probably thinking. As Edward's girlfriend, I'm perfectly fine with it. I have no problem with his dad staying up there. As the owner of the bar downstairs, I worry that temptation will be too much."

Esme grinned. "From what I hear, you're not afraid to…ermm…voice your opinion toward my husband."

My cheeks heated. "Yeah, sorry about that. I just…he made some offhanded comments that made me a little…prickly."

"Don't you dare apologize for protecting my son, Bella. Just don't even do it. You and Rosalie are very similar that way, and I wouldn't change it. I'm well aware that's why you came to the country club that day with Edward, so…"

I laughed, because Rose and I were not exactly shy. "Is that why you're here?"

She nodded again. "I just… I wanted to make sure you were okay with it. I'm not… There are more things to contend with, concerning my marriage, aside from the obvious issues. I've agreed to try, and Carlisle's agreed to give me space and time. Once he's out of Serenity, he's supposed to see a therapist. I'll be joining him occasionally. We've known Dr. Banner for years."

"That's good. The boys will be happy," I told her.

"I wasn't… I didn't want to get their hopes up."

"Just be honest. Tell them you're trying. Nothing more, nothing less. They don't expect rainbows and sunshine. They're worried for you, but they also know what happened was just a big mess."

She laughed a little harshly. "Yeah, a mess is right." She reached for her purse, pulling out a stack of envelopes. "I was going to give these to you. Edward's mail still comes to my house. Some of it, anyway."

Smiling, I stood up and grabbed a ring of keys off the hook by the door. "C'mon. You can drop them off yourself and see his place."

I pulled on a coat and then handed hers back, leading her outside and up to the third-floor apartment. Stepping back into Edward's apartment was like going back in time. I didn't really come up here often. I would check on things occasionally, but it sat untouched, really, and that included the bed that still sat with twisted sheets and memories of his last night home. He'd said to leave it, and I had.

Esme walked around with a small smile, taking in pictures and awards, sheet music, and strewn clothes. "This isn't my son's doing. The decorating…"

Laughing, I shook my head. "No, Tanya and Kate helped him."

She nodded knowingly but set his mail down on the kitchen table. "I should get going. I…" She turned to me, hugging me closely. "Thank you, Bella. I'll let Carlisle know to come see you."

Smiling, I walked her to the door. "I'll be here."

**~oOo~**

Tori stifled a yawn as she took a seat at the bar. Garrett was chatting softly on the phone as he paced on the other side of the room. It had been somewhat of a busy Friday night, most of our business coming in from the hotel around the corner. However, I had closed the bar a few minutes early.

Garrett finished his conversation, and I fought my smile when I heard him tell Maggie that he loved her before pocketing his phone. When he took a stool next to Tori, I met his gaze.

"When does she move in?" I teased him.

"Shut up, Bella," he answered with a laugh and slow shake of his head. Though, his grimace gave him away. "Next month."

Tori and I laughed at him, but I finished up counting the drawer and putting the deposit together. Normally I'd have left it for the next day, but I'd closed early for a reason. It was rare that we all three worked together, so I needed to take advantage of it. I didn't know how long it would take, and I was expecting a video call from Edward tonight. I wanted to get finished. I missed Edward to the point of madness, and time seemed to be creeping along. I'd been back from touring with him for a few weeks now, but it felt like forever. Though, I was glad it was almost February. I needed his face on the video chat and his sweet voice telling me he loved me, and I was pretty fucking sure I couldn't sleep until those things happened.

"Boss?" Tori asked when I braced my hands on the bar top across from them both.

"When are we closing?" Garrett asked suspiciously, smirking when my gaze shot to his. He folded his arms across his chest, tilting his head at me. "Gimme a break. I know you, Bella," he stated, tapping his temple and then pointed to me. "You look like you're trying to gnaw off your arm to get out of a trap. So…talk to us. What's the plan?"

Suddenly, tears welled up in my eyes and I sagged. "I don't know!"

"Oh, shit," Garrett hissed, and he was instantly in front of me, lifting me up and setting me on a stool. "Aww, dammit. Bella…"

Tori wrapped her arms around me, whispering, "You're scarin' the shit out of us, boss, so c'mon, spill it."

Garrett dragged his stool so that he was directly in front of me, cupping my face. "You gotta tell us what you _want_." He wiped away my tears that didn't want to seem to stop, smiling warmly. "You and I both know you only kept this place for Charlie. I don't know what he was thinking, leaving it to you, but you seemed happy with it. Now…" He grinned, huffing a laugh. "Things have changed. If anyone in the world knew what it was like to go with the flow, it was Chainsaw Charlie Swan."

The mention of my dad only caused me to cry harder. I was tired, I was stressed out, and I was beginning to wonder if I was collapsing under the pressure. If that was the case, then the entire tour – the next almost six damn months – would be pure torture.

"Bella, stop," Garrett said firmly. "This isn't you. You don't fall apart over _a guy_." When I glared at him, he grinned. "There she is. See?" He winked my way, reaching for a beverage napkin and setting it into my hand. "This isn't about Edward…Masen…whatever you want to call him. This is about your dad…and this place. You're attached to it, I get that, but I wonder if you've held on to it for too long…and for all the wrong reasons."

Letting out a slow, shaky breath, I gazed around the place. Most of the remodeling that the video crew had done was still standing. The place looked good. It was a shrine to my dad, though, and I wondered if Garrett was right.

"Maybe," I muttered, my gaze falling to my lap as I tucked my hair behind my ear.

"Maybe," Garrett repeated slowly, narrowing his eyes on me. "Bella, you fought and scratched to keep this place. Why?"

"Because he left it to me."

Garrett scoffed. "That's true, but why else?"

I looked to Tori, who had been quiet, but her eyes were watery and warm. She wiped at my tears, saying, "It was all you had left of him."

Nodding, I sighed deeply, my breath hitching a little. "I dunno. I just… I'm tired, and the numbers…and this place…"

"And your heart is thousands of miles away," Tori finished, giggling when I looked to her. "Aw, sweetie… It's okay. It's not like you saw him coming. Now shit has changed. You just have to tell us what you want."

"You could do whatever you see fit with this place. Change the hours, close it down, or turn it into a dentist's office, for fuck's sake. But you can't kill yourself over it. And you can't tell me it's booming, either. I make the deposits, too, you know." He cupped my chin to make me look his way. "Or…you hire one more person so you don't have to be here as much."

"And I swear to God, if you say you're worried about our jobs, I'll snatch the hair outta your head," Tori added, smirking at Garrett's chuckle. "We'll live."

Sighing, I nodded and swallowed around the lump in my throat. I got up from my seat and grabbed the ledger. "Our deadest nights are Sundays and Mondays. I think…maybe we should close those nights. Cut the costs there?"

"Okay, that actually makes sense. What else?"

"Fuck, I don't know. Let's just start there. I've got to go see Phil, have him tell me what options I have." I groaned at the thought of seeing my stepfather. It wasn't that we didn't get along. We did, but I just wasn't sure I wanted my mother to know what I was considering. "Second, I want to have a few people perform before I decide what I'm doing. Harry Clearwater has agreed to come play here. We can promote that, but then…"

"And your next trip?" Tori asked, and when I shot a glance her way, she laughed. "Just fucking _go_! If we're closed two nights of the week, then G and I have this place covered. So…what's the fucking problem? Even if you only managed it, we'd be fine. Tell us the dates, and we'll cover. End of story."

I looked to Garrett, and he nodded and smiled my way. "He's a lucky bastard, Bella. I remember a time I'd have given my right arm for you to look at me the way you look at him. And fuck, that man is done. Stick a goddamn fork in him."

Giggling, I hugged him. "Thank you. Both of you. We'll start this coming Sunday and Monday. No other decisions need to be made right away. I just…" I gazed around the place, feeling a little bit lost, a whole lot overwhelmed, and tremendously strung-out.

My phone lit up and started to vibrate across the bar, and Tori pushed it my way.

"Nothing else needs to change right this very second, but you shouldn't worry about this place. Answer it. I'm willing to bet he's just as frazzled as you are," she said with a laugh.

"We'll lock up," Garrett agreed, pushing me toward the back.

I swiped my thumb across my phone to answer. "Hey," I breathed, sighing in relief as I rushed out the back door and up the stairs to my apartment landing.

"Angel," Edward said tentatively. "You… You weren't on for video chat…"

"I know, I'm sorry. I just walked out of the bar," I told him, unlocking my apartment and leaning back against the door once I was inside. "I… I kept Garrett and Tori for a meeting."

"Are you… Baby, are you crying?"

"No! Yes! Maybe," I rambled, snorting into a sniffly laugh at myself.

"You okay?"

"Yes, Edward. I promise."

He was quiet for a moment, finally asking, "I wanna _see_ you, angel. Please?"

"Okay."

I tossed my keys and jacket onto the kitchen table, walking to my bed, where the tablet was charging on my nightstand. Swiping quickly, I connected to him. His face appeared on the screen, and he was in his usual spot on a hotel-room bed, shirtless, beautiful, and freshly showered damp hair as we both set down our phones. But his green eyes darkened at the sight of my probably splotchy face and red-rimmed eyes.

Suddenly, he huffed a humorless laugh. "Jesus, even crying, you're the prettiest fucking thing I've ever seen," he murmured, shaking his head slowly. "What happened? Talk to me."

I leaned the tablet against the pillow he'd have used had he been there, curling up on my side. My whole being literally ached to have those colorful arms wrapped around me, to have that sweet face in front of mine, but I took what I could get at the moment and started talking. I told him about the numbers, about being tired, and about the meeting with Garrett and Tori. I told him I needed to see Phil but that I also wanted to have some of my dad's old friends play before I made any rash decisions. I rambled until he was practically shaking his tablet to get me to shut up.

"Bella…angel… Wait, wait, wait!" he was yelling and kind of laughing at me. "Baby, stop. You don't have to do anything, you know. If the place means that much…"

"It's not that, Edward." I sighed, swiping away the fresh tears. "I'm stubborn, you know."

"No!" he gasped, grinning at my sniffly giggle.

"I held on to it for my dad, but at what cost? I dunno…" My voice trailed off, and Edward seemed to shift on the other side of the world. "Where are you, anyway?"

"Jacksonville, Florida," he answered quickly, propping his tablet up and leaning on his elbow. But he waved a hand. "It doesn't matter where I am, angel. This conversation is important, so I'm _right here_." He pointed toward the camera, sighing deeply. He seemed to debate something silently but then licked his lips. "Tell me why you're so upset. The truth, Bella. I mean… I get that you're tired, I get that it's never been a money thing for you, and I understand that you…you want to relieve yourself of some of the responsibility, but…if in doing all of that makes you like this, then I don't see a benefit."

I drank in the sight of him because God, I'd missed him. We talked and played games and texted on the phone all the time, but he'd been on the road for a few days, and this was the first hotel he'd checked into this week. We seemed to save video chats for those nights alone. Something private, something just…us. He looked exhausted but so very sincere about what I was dealing with, not to mention he looked absolutely gorgeous.

Swallowing, I frowned a little. "My dad opened that bar to stay close to me. He wanted a home base of sorts. It was a place I…and eventually Mike…came to stay with him every other weekend or so. He opened it to give his friends a place to play, those who didn't get the big record deals or…or…even the steady studio work. It's…all I have left of him. When I moved into my apartment, when I started college, it made him happy. He was never in a position to be a full-time dad when I was little, so once I was there, he tried so hard. I…I guess he knew he wasn't healthy, because he'd put the whole damn place, every dime he'd ever made, not to mention the rights to his music, in my name before I'd even turned eighteen. Edward, his…his heart attack was right there at the bar's front door. The media had trapped him right there, wanting to know all about the big name he was working with at the time. Right where you were trapped…"

"Oh, baby," he groaned and sighed, shaking his head slowly.

"When he died, several people tried to fight me on it. My mom never wanted me to keep it, much less run a _bar_. Several of his musician friends wanted it, thought they should have it, because they'd worked with him for decades. I stood my ground. I dug in, and I told them all to go to hell.

"Phil helped me – despite my mother's protestations – set up accounts, and he monitors my money. The place barely breaks even, Edward. I wasn't kidding when I told you I used the apartment's rent to manage. It's the truth. I own the building outright, but…expenses versus income…"

Edward grinned a little. "Well, I'm glad I paid you a whole year, baby."

Giggling, I balled my hand up into a fist, because the need to touch him made me ache from head to damn toe. Toying with a wrinkle in the sheets, I went on. "My dad left me enough that I don't have to work, but I wanted to keep the place…"

"In his honor," he finished for me.

Nodding, I added, "Yeah, I mean… Look at how _you_ reacted when you first realized it."

Edward laughed, and it was soft and deep and beautiful. A warm smile stayed on his face even when the laughter died out. "I guess my question is, angel… Why panic, why all this…now?" He held up a hand. "And don't say because you want to free up time for me, Bella. You were thinking about this on the bus. So…something tells me that deep down you were already looking for an out…or at the least a change."

"And maybe you stumbling into my bar that night was the catalyst for that change?" I asked teasingly.

His grin was a stunning flash on his face. "Maybe. Was it?"

"Maybe."

That sat between us on the screens of our tablets for a moment.

"I miss you," I stated softly.

"Oh, angel…you have no idea how much I miss you, too," he said with a slow shake of his head. He looked around his hotel room, only to meet my gaze again. "You know absolutely nothing has to change right this very second. No decisions are necessary today…or tonight…or fuck, even tomorrow. You say you've decided to close two nights out of the week, and that's good. You could use the break."

"I know," I sighed, smirking his way. "The selfish side of me just wants to run to you. Stay with you."

He chuckled. "I'm all for fucking selfish, Bella. And I'd love that, but I don't think you'd be happy just following us around full-time, angel. But Jesus, you're welcome anywhere and any damn time." He leaned closer. "Baby, look at me."

When I did, I saw how serious he was.

"I'll be home soon. I just need you to hang in there for me for a couple more weeks. I know it'll only be for a few days, but after Miami, we fly home to Seattle."

"I can't wait."

"Me, either, but you gotta hang in there, and we can figure this out. Angel, you're very independent, and I fucking _love and adore_ that about you, but…I _will_ help you. Here…there…on tour, you just have to let me know. I won't always be gone." When my tears started again, he smiled sadly but gripped his hair in frustration. "I know it feels that way. Trust me, I have my own impatient moments, baby. And you're fucking killing me with the tears; I wish I was there right now, but it won't always be this hard."

"Okay," I finally conceded, feeling so much better that I got it all off my chest, even if nothing had been decided. "I love you."

His smile once again lit up his face. "I love you, too, angel. More than anything." He huffed a humorless laugh, raking his hands through his hair again. "Now…I'm worried with what I'm about to tell you will only add to your stress."

"What?" I asked. "What is it? Are there more fucking rumors going around?"

He barked a laugh. "Aren't there always rumors going around, Bella?" he asked rhetorically. "No, angel. I just… I talked to Dad today. He's getting out in two weeks. He's… Well, he's going to come see you about getting the key to my apartment. I mean, I know Mom came to see you, but…he's being released just about the time I'm coming home, so…"

"Oh!" I smiled and nodded. "Okay. I'll get up there and straighten up for him…and clean out the fridge of beer," I tacked on just to see Edward grin, but he looked nervous, and it made me laugh. "Edward, just because your dad is up there doesn't mean you can't stay with me for the time you're home."

"Oh, thank _fuck_!" he gasped, his head falling back. "I was gonna offer to sleep on your damn front doorstep, angel. Not even fucking kidding."

"Shut up, Edward." I cracked up, shaking my head. "I thought we were a package deal."

His head popped up from where it had fallen back to the pillow, and he sighed sweetly. "We are, Bella. For as long as you want."

"Good, then send your dad on."

"'Kay," he sighed, shifting to sit up, and he picked up his guitar. "Now…I want you to relax, angel."

I didn't even bother to undress for bed, just kicked my shoes off the side and curled up so that Edward's voice, notes, and love settled my heart.

**~oOo~**

"I thought closing two nights a week was supposed to make me _less_ busy," I grumbled, cracking open Edward's fridge to empty it out.

Tori chuckled as she wandered around his place. She loved to fan-girl on Masen, but she respected Edward, simply because she respected me. Even the first time she'd set eyes on him, she'd kept his privacy. At the moment, she was eyeing all of his awards and pictures on the far bookcase.

"It did, but it seems to have allowed you to fill up said free time with other shit," she teased back, grinning my way when I sighed deeply.

She was right, though. After my long, emotional conversation with Edward via tablet, things had calmed down for me a little, but I found that I remained just as busy, only with different stuff. I went to see Phil, and despite my small panic attack, the bar was doing okay. We weren't in jeopardy, but it wasn't booming either. Just like I'd told Edward, I was pretty much breaking even between his rent, the income from the bar, and the interest I earned from my other accounts versus all the expenses. Phil didn't seem worried about any of it but offered his assistance when I needed it. He also promised not to tell my mother until I was ready to make a decision.

I'd also gone to see Harry. He would be playing at Charlie's Pub in a few nights, which made me shake my head, since everything seemed to be building up to that same night. Edward would play the Miami show and fly out that same night. Carlisle was due to get out of Serenity the same day, and I'd put off cleaning up Edward's place as long as I could. As much as my sweet, sexy, sentimental rock god of a boyfriend wanted to come home to his own place that was in the same disarray as we'd left it, it wasn't possible. I understood it, but the thought of Edward's father seeing that ransacked bed made me blush. When I'd told Edward, he'd laughed but said we could do just as much damage to my own bed.

Fuck, I couldn't wait for that. Not only did I miss his arms holding me, but I missed how he made me feel when we were alone, together, connected in every damn way.

Between the garbage can and the box I'd brought up with me, I cleaned out Edward's fridge of spoiled stuff and alcohol. The beer, a couple of bottles of wine, and the small half-empty bottle of vodka he'd had forever were going down to my place. Edward didn't drink much, and I served the shit all day, but occasionally we'd have a drink together. However, it couldn't be in this apartment when Carlisle came, simply because to tempt the recovering alcoholic would be cruel. And I honestly believed Edward's father was trying his damnedest to get back on his feet.

After rechecking cabinets and the freezer, I focused on the bed. I stripped it down, and Tori helped me remake it. We also gave the apartment one last walk-through, just to make sure it was ready for someone else to stay there other than its sweet owner.

My eyes drifted around the room. So many memories with my dad were up there. He'd lived sparsely, so with Edward's belongings filling up the space, it barely looked like the same apartment. And the newer memories were almost overwhelming! Edward was everywhere in that space – probably stemming from how much I missed him. He was in the kitchen, where he'd stack pizza boxes until I teased him. He was in the living room, where he'd lounge back with his guitar. He was even on the piano bench, where he'd first played me to sleep. Oh God, and the bed… He was all over that bed, with pleading, loving green eyes, sweet words, sensual touches, and endless toe-curling kisses…everywhere. Then there was the treadmill. Shaking my head to clear it of shirtless, ink-covered sweaty skin and a fiercely concentrated face as he ran, I turned to Tori.

"You ready? I think we're done. I'm just gonna take this stuff to my place."

She nodded absentmindedly, her eyes on the shelf of awards and pictures, and she tapped one of them. "I watched this show…the night he got this one." She tilted her head at it and then turned to face me. "He went with Heidi to that one. Did you know?"

"Yeah, I'm sure he did," I said, shrugging a shoulder.

"The rumors are pretty thin, but they're still trying to put him with her. Did you know _that_?"

I snorted, shaking my head. "Honestly, I try not to pay it much attention. Ignorance is bliss. Rose usually sends me stuff that I need to know, but otherwise, I trust Edward."

Tori smiled, and we both jumped when my phone bleeped. Grinning at a text from Edward, I held it up. "Case in point…"

_Angel, watch out for paps over the next few days. They know I'll be coming home soon. ;)_

He'd sent a link, which had a quick interview with Edward and Jasper about how the first leg of the tour had gone. Sales on the new album were up, the tickets were flying out of the box offices on the next leg, and both boys looked exhausted but proud.

"And…" I sang sarcastically as I texted him back. "It just keeps coming."

Tori chuckled, picking up the box that we were taking. "C'mon, B… We've done all the damage we can do here."

The next few days, my phone never shut the hell up. Happy, hyper texts came in from Edward, who sent pictures from just about every inch of Florida, including the beach, which I told him was cruel since Washington was still damned cold. Calls came in from Serenity, verifying that Carlisle had a place to go, and I even talked to Edward's dad to find out if he needed to be picked up, but he'd said no. There were a few from everyone else I knew, and my cell phone battery hated me.

I was about to head down to the bar to start setting up for Harry's performance, when my phone went off again. The groan of want and aching need echoed out into my empty apartment. Edward and the rest of the gang were on some white, sandy beach. The water was blue and choppy. There were greasy, sunburned tourists behind him as it showed his silly-sweet self lounging in a beach chair. His skin was darker, his ink seemingly brighter with the obvious suntan lotion he'd put on, and his nose was pink. He looked like sex and love and all the things I needed back home, even though it would only be for a few days.

I texted him back quickly. _You're cruel, Edward Cullen. It's still fucking freezing here._

_I'll be home to warm you up soon, angel. Promise._

I groaned again, hating him slightly for teasing, but it lasted for only a split second, because damn it all, I couldn't wait. I typed back that I loved him and that I'd see him in the morning. His flight would be long and tedious, and he would most likely arrive home well after I'd gone to bed tonight. I'd already told him to come straight to my apartment.

I locked my door, catching a glimpse of the paparazzi across street. Luckily, they didn't see me before I opened up the back door of the bar and went on in. I shook my head at it all. They were ready for _Masen_ to come back home, and I honestly couldn't blame them.

Once inside, I got to work. I made coffee for myself, as well as the poor security guard who would arrive soon. It didn't seem long before everyone started to show up: Garrett, Tori, and the security guard I'd gotten to know. Felix was enormous, but he was also very calm and mellow. He never drank anything other than soda and coffee, and he was a brand new father, which meant he was happy to show off pictures. His little boy looked like a ball of chunky arms and legs and giggles.

Felix took his usual mug of coffee and placed himself outside the front door. Garrett and Tori stocked up the bar of ice and glasses, and I opened up the curtain on the stage so that Harry could set up when he got there later. Just before I was about to tell Felix to go ahead and let people in, he stuck his head in the door.

"Miss Bella, there's someone out here asking for you," he said with his deep, rumbling tenor. "A Carlisle Cullen."

"Oh, let him in, Felix. He's good."

He opened the door wider, and Edward's dad thanked him when he walked through the door. My eyebrows shot up at how different he looked. He was healthy, with pink in his cheeks and a half smile that he'd genetically passed on to his sons. It was his eyes that told me how much better the man in front of me was doing. They were bright-blue, sharp, and sparkling with what I would've loved to have said was happiness, but maybe he just felt better.

"Look at you!" I gasped, grinning when he chuckled, because his face reddened just like Edward's, and I laughed a little more. "You know, your youngest son blushes like that. I was wondering where he got it."

"Bella, it's really good to see you," he greeted, pulling me in for a hug.

"You look…" I started, and he grinned again.

"Yeah, I feel it, too. I'm…" He took a deep breath and let it out as he gazed around my bar.

"Too much?" I asked him, grimacing a little when he shrugged a shoulder. "C'mon, we'll go to my office for a minute. I promised you coffee, didn't I?"

He almost followed me but then grabbed my hand gently. "Bella, wait. Let's um… I _need _to get used to it."

"Not all at one time," I argued gently.

"I've hidden long enough." He smiled again, gesturing to a table in the corner. "This is…real, Bella. It's life and reality, and I have to find a way to push through it. I _have_ to."

The pride I had for him, for the huge amount I could see he had in himself, was palpable. "All righty, then… Sit, and I'll bring the coffee."

Garrett and Tori manned the bar as people started to trickle in, and I set down a mug for Carlisle. "I've got Edward's place all set for you."

He smiled and nodded. "I appreciate that. He's due back…"

"Oh, probably the middle of the night," I answered, my face heating when I continued. "He'll be staying with me."

Carlisle laughed, shaking his head at me. "Do _not_ be embarrassed, Bella. Please. I realize my timing is impeccable, and I'm kind of hoarding in on your space here. So… My son loves you, sweetheart, so I assumed he'd be coming straight home to you."

"Okay," I said with a chuckle but looked up when Felix stepped up to our table. "What?"

"I know there are a few people that I'm supposed to watch for, Miss Bella. I just… There's an Aro Volturi here…along with James Allen. They're asking to see you personally."

My lip twitched, and something deep inside me was immediately on edge. "Why?"

"They're here to see the show," Felix replied, stepping aside soI could see the two men in question.

Aro was just as skeezy-looking as ever. James looked pompous and smarmy. My stomach clenched at the two of them inside my bar, not to mention the mere thought of having to speak with them.

"Bella?" Carlisle called softly. "Isn't that…"

"That's Radiant Eclipse's record manager…and former drummer," I muttered back, sighing deeply. "I was wondering if they'd ever show up here…again. If I piss off Aro, he could make trouble for Edward. James is just a pig." I turned to Felix. "I would like it if you stayed _inside_ the front doors tonight. Can you do that?"

"Yes, ma'am, but… If you want, I can see them out."

Sighing, I shook my head. "It's tempting, especially James. Aro won't do much to me, not with this many people around. Plus, I doubt he wants to piss off Edward."

Carlisle chuckled, but his phone bleeped. "It's the hospital. I'm trying to get back to work. Is there…?"

"C'mon. I'll show you up to Edward's apartment. You can talk there."

We stood up from the table, and Aro stepped forward, holding out his hand. "Miss Isabella Swan," he greeted me. "I'm a huge fan of your father's. I don't think we've ever met officially. I'm Aro Volturi. I believe you already know James…"

"I know who you are," I told him, but I did shake his hand, which was cold and clammy. "And yes… James." I locked gazes with the guy in front of me, and he gave me a wolfish grin that had the hairs on my neck standing up.

"Bella, won't you join us for a drink?" he asked.

"I wish I could," I lied easily, smiling as I pointed around the bar. "But as you can see, I'm getting busy, so if you'll excuse me, I've got to get to work. Enjoy the show. Harry is very good."

I shot a look to Felix, who nodded once, leaning back against the wall by the front door. I showed Carlisle up to Edward's apartment, handing him the spare key.

"Bella, are you okay?" he asked before I could head back down to the bar.

"Yeah, I just…" I laughed a little, shrugging a shoulder. "I just want today to be over. I miss Edward…so much so, that everything else seems to pale in comparison to it."

He smiled, but his brow furrowed. "Sweetheart, are you sure about…?"

"Aro and James?" I asked, and he nodded. "Edward will be mad that they're here, but honestly, letting them stay is easier than the trouble they could stir up should I offend them." I wrinkled my nose. "Edward's got six or seven more months left to go under Aro, and he could do plenty in that time. I've seen what happens when the man isn't happy with the band. That's how Heidi ended up in the video, so really, if letting them stay and watch and then leave keeps them quiet and appeases them, then…" I waved a hand. "I'll be too busy to deal with them anyway."

Carlisle's phone beeped again, and I hugged him again. "It's really good to see you, and I'm right downstairs if you need anything. Feel free to use the bar's back door to avoid the media. And that goes for when your son is here, too. Okay?"

"Yes, ma'am," he replied with a chuckle.

I came back through the kitchen to behind the bar to see Harry had arrived with his small band. He gave me a huge hug and a loud kiss on my cheek. I pointed to the stage, and he went on up to get started.

The place was pretty full, and the three of us were manning the bar. I wasn't completely unaware that Aro had placed himself by the stage, nor did it go unnoticed that James was at the end of the bar. He'd tried numerous times to get Tori's attention, only to gain Garrett's instead. Occasionally Felix would walk through, but mainly he kept his sharp eyes on the entire place. The only time he didn't was to come to the bar for a refill on his coffee. This time, I poured one for myself, grinning when he clinked his to mine and walked away.

"Uh, no…I don't think so," I heard Tori's sarcastic tone, laced with her derisive laugh.

Sipping my coffee, I walked down to the other end of the bar to stand in front of James. Harry was on a small five-minute break, and I leaned a hip against the bar.

"James," I said slowly, softly. "I get why he's here." I pointed toward Aro. "What I don't get is why _you_ are."

James chuckled, and it made my skin crawl. "Why do you think he's here?"

Grinning, I sipped my coffee again. "He's not exactly happy with me or my relationship with…Masen." I used Edward's stage name on purpose. "He's tried like hell to mess it up. He's here as a warning. It won't work."

James sneered. "Masen," he scoffed, rolling his eyes. "That motherfucker owes me."

"Not from what I hear," I countered. "How's that court thing going?" I asked him, smiling when his face reddened. "Now…leave my staff alone, or I will have you removed from my bar. Felix has been downing French roast coffee all damn day, so he's got a little extra energy to burn. I'd love to see the headlines when the paps outside catch pictures of him tossing you out to the curb."

"Aw, Bella…don't be that way. I… I'm sorry. I just wanted to apologize for the last time I was here," he drawled, grinning up at me with probably his best smile. It most likely worked on the weak-minded and shallow girls, but I wasn't buying his bullshit.

"Just…leave her alone. Yeah?"

"Fine, fine," he conceded, though he was still smirking as he held up his empty beer mug. "Can I at least get another beer, Bella? Please?"

Narrowing my eyes at his switch in demeanor, I nodded and set down my coffee mug in order to walk to the beer tap. I poured him a new mug and set it down in front of him. He was holding out money to me, and I reached out to take it. When I did, he grabbed my wrist lightly.

"C'mon, Bella. We'll start over. Friends?" he asked, holding up his beer for a toast.

Laughing, I rolled my eyes as I pulled my hand back. I wasn't buying this shit at all, but I picked up my coffee just to shut him up.

I clinked my coffee mug to his beer mug just as Harry started his next set. I thought I heard Felix call my name, but I lifted my mug to my lips. Before I could sip it, another hand clamped down hard on my wrist.

"Bella! No!" Carlisle snapped from beside me. He shook his head. "He put something in it!"

"What?" I asked, glancing from his absolutely ire-filled face to James's surprised one. I set the mug down on the counter like it had burned me.

Felix worked his way across the bar to catch James before he could slither off the barstool. "You couldn't hear me, Miss Bella. I tried to…"

I held up a hand that was a bit shaky and simply glared at James. "Felix, call the police."

"Already done," he grunted but grinned when James whimpered in his grip.

I spun to Garrett, who'd appeared at my side. "Tell Harry to cut it short. Tell him why. Give him my apologies," I told him, and he took off for the stage. I rounded on Carlisle, who looked like he was about to punch some-damn-body. "How'd you…? What'd you…?"

"Shh, sweetheart… C'mere," he said, guiding me to a barstool. "I was coming to thank you for all you did in the apartment…and check on you, to be honest. I um…I spoke to Edward. He said he tried to call your phone, but he knew that you were most likely busy, so he asked me to come down and give you a message." He glanced at his watch. "He's three hours ahead, so he's probably finished with his show. He said he'd call you again before he gets on the plane."

The doctor in him kicked in, and Carlisle checked my eyes, my pulse, my shaking hands. "I used the back door, like you said. I just… I walked out as soon as you stepped away from James. He leaned over the bar to drop something in your coffee. I'm… I…"

I flew into Carlisle's arms, hugging him. "Thank you," I mumbled into his chest but pushed away when I heard the music die the same time Aro's foul voice met my ears.

"What's going on here?"

Four of Seattle's finest walked through the door of my bar, and Felix pushed James over to them.

My eyes narrowed, and my shock had worn off as I glared at Aro's falsely innocent, wide-eyed gaze. "You rat bastard," I hissed, pointing to James. "Let me guess as to how you wanted this shit to go down! You bring that pig into my bar, and he… What? Drugs me? Maybe even rapes me, and you have proof I cheated on E—Masen?! Seriously? Is that what you wanted?"

Aro's eyes narrowed dangerously as the officers led James outside in cuffs. He stepped in front of me, only to be flanked by Harry and Carlisle.

"Careful, Mr. Volturi," Harry warned. "You don't want to fuck with that girl. You won't make it to your precious Aston Martin without several broken bones. I promise you." When Aro gaze up at him, he grinned. "Oh, I know you. Every musician in Seattle knows who and what the fuck you are…and what you're capable of. Careful what'choo say to her."

I knew there were still patrons in the bar. I knew my phone was buzzing like hell in my pocket. I finally pulled it out and handed it to Carlisle when I saw Edward's beautiful face on my screen. "You talk to him." I turned back to Aro. "You have _no idea_ what you've done."

"No, you little shit. _You_ have no idea. You think you're something special, but really, you're just Masen's current toy. You think he loves you, but you'll be left behind in the dust. He'll drop you like a bad habit for his next whore."

I laughed, turning when I could hear my Edward over the line yelling at his dad. Shaking my head slowly, I said, "Guess we'll find out, won't we?"

One of the officers walked back in and up to Aro. "Are you Aro Volturi?" he asked, and when Aro nodded, he jerked a thumb toward the door. "There's a James Allen asking for you. We have him in custody. Says you brought him here."

Aro shrugged a shoulder. "Don't know him. Sorry."

I laughed, looking to the tall man in uniform. "Yes, he does. He's his boss." Aro rounded on me, and I held up a hand. "Aro, can you make a fist?" I asked, smirking at Harry's snort, because my dad had taught me this. When the man made a shaky fist with his clammy hand, I grinned. "Good, now go fuck yourself. It'll be a lot less painful than what…_Masen_ will do to you."

Aro was guided outside. My tainted mug of coffee was handed over to an officer. And somehow I answered every last question, but I could barely retain much of it. I was terrified I'd just unleashed hell on Edward. I was a little unnerved at what Aro had said to me, and I ached to hear Edward's voice, feel his arms around me. Instead, it was his father who guided me up to my apartment after it was all said and done.

"I want to talk to Edward," I whispered, tears welling up as he sat me down at my kitchen table.

"He's in the air, sweetheart. He's um… He gave me a message to give to you," he said solemnly.

My heart hurt at what that message could be. I was so afraid he'd be mad at me for riling up Aro.

Carlisle grinned. "He said… Tell my angel she should've kicked his ass, and that I'll be home before the sun rises."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… If you're anything like my pre-readers, the first words were… "HOSHIT, Edward's gonna be so fucking pissed…" Yes. Yes, he is.**

**Stress can do funny things to people, which is probably why this chapter went the way it did. I think I transferred all my own into poor Bella. LOL But it happens to the strongest of women. We do pick up with Edward next chapter.**

**The pic teasers and the playlist are in their usual places. Jenny's working on the blog to get it caught up. The next update will be either Wednesday or Thursday. My schedule is a little wonky, so just bear with me. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	22. One Step Closer to the Edge

**A/N… I won't keep you guys here. See me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 22 – One Step Closer to the Edge**

_I cannot take this anymore  
Saying everything I've said before  
All these words they make no sense  
I find bliss in ignorance  
Less I hear the less you'll say  
You'll find that out anyway_

_Just like before…_

_Everything you say to me_  
_Takes me one step closer to the edge_  
_And I'm about to break_  
_I need a little room to breathe_  
_Cause I'm one step closer to the edge_  
_I'm about to break_

"_One Step Closer" – Linkin Park_

**EDWARD**

I rubbed my wet hair with a towel at the same time I glared at my phone. "Well, damn…" I sighed, tossing the towel down onto the vanity. "Bella must be busy as hell."

Emmett smirked but glanced at his watch. "Well, Harry would be on stage about now, so yeah…probably." He grinned, pointing to my phone. "Call Dad. He should be there by now."

"Oh, yeah," I mumbled, shaking my head. "That's gonna take some getting used to, for real. Dad being in my apartment."

Emmett laughed but scrolled through his phone, most likely checking our flight information. We were all busting our asses to get to the Miami airport so we could get home, even if it was only for a few days. Home was fucking home, and we were all dying to see Seattle…and our girls. Poor Alec was just about to come out of his own skin with Carrie so close to having that baby. I had a funny feeling he wouldn't be joining us for the second leg of the tour.

I dialed my dad, not really expecting an answer, but grinned when he answered with a chipper, "Hey, champ. How's Miami?"

"Fucking hot!" I growled but chuckled at the same time. "Jesus, the air is ninety percent liquid, I swear to God."

He laughed, and he sounded good.

"Are you at Bella's?" I asked him.

"I am, and she's a gracious host already."

"I'm sure." I laughed lightly, shaking my head. "I tried to call her, but I know she's probably slammed. Are you gonna see her?"

"I can…" he hedged but then added. "Actually, I was going to check on her anyway. She's sort of got her hands full down there. Your record producer's down there…with James."

My head snapped around to Emmett, and he looked up curiously from his phone when I asked, "What do you mean? Aro and James are at Charlie's…like now?"

Emmett shot off the vanity and out of the bathroom, only to drag poor Rose back in with him.

"Dad, I need to talk to Bella. Can you tell her I want to talk to her before I get on the plane?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll go back down there now." When I thanked him, he simply said, "Don't thank me, son. I owe you, remember?"

"'Kay," I sighed, ending the call with him before rounding on my brother and sister-in-law. "What's Aro playing at?" I snapped. "He just…shows up? And with James? Seriously?"

Rose's nostrils flared as she shook her head slowly. "Let's go. Tony's ready to get us out of here. Keep your time with the backstage-pass holders brief. C'mon."

We stepped out into the hall, and Jasper read my mood instantly. "What the hell?"

Emmett explained as we worked our way through quick autographs and brief pictures. By the time the guys knew what was going on, we were pretty much running to the tour bus. Mike was pale, pissed, and eerily quiet, but he was leading the way.

"Go. Just fucking floor it, Tony," Emmett snapped.

"That stupid motherfucker," Alec hissed, shaking his head slowly and meeting my gaze. "Ed, I know you're about five seconds from going all Hulk in here, but…try her again."

I couldn't even laugh at his jab at me. I tried my dad's phone, then Bella's, and then Bella's again. No answer.

"Now no one's answering?" I turned to my brother.

"Relax, baby bro. It's loud in there."

Nodding, I just sat and stared at my phone. I didn't try again until Tony pulled up to the airport. Our bags were loaded on a trolley, and we were led through the usual back hallways to a VIP lounge.

Putting the phone to my ear, I paced, gripping my hair as it rang and rang. When someone did finally answer, I had to pull the phone away from my ear. The noise was insane on the other end.

"Bella?"

"No, son…"

My heart sank. "Where is…?"

Over the line I could hear her. I caught words like drugs, rape, and my name…but not Edward…Masen.

My hand balled up into a fist. "What the fuck is going on, Dad?!" I snapped, and instantly, Rose and Emmett were in front of me.

"Edward, I need you to listen to me," he stated in such a firm tone that my mouth snapped shut with a click of my teeth. "First… Bella's _fine_. She's all right, champ. Okay?"

"Yeah. Okay."

"Right now, she's talking to the police."

I sat down hard on the closest bench, and Rose and Emmett flanked either side of me, but it was Rose who smashed her head close to mine in order to hear over the phone.

"What happened?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"James… He…"

Dad sighed, and voices got louder, and I pretty sure I heard my girl tell someone to go fuck themselves. My eyebrows shot up at that, and I was about to throw my damn phone, but Dad started talking quickly, quietly.

"I came back downstairs to the bar. Bella said to use the back door, so I came in that way. I was gonna give her your message so she'd be ready when you called back. James, he… When I stepped out behind her, she set her mug down to pour him a beer. He leaned over the bar to put something in her cup. I _saw_ him, Edward! I had to stop her, and now…all hell's kinda broken loose because she's scared and pissed and…"

"What was it?!"

"If I had to guess…rohypnol…"

I dropped the phone into Rose's hand – not caring that she almost didn't catch it – but I had to step away. I walked across the lounge to another bench, gripping it and flipping the son of a bitch over. I heard voices, voices I knew, and I felt hands grabbing at me, but I shrugged them off, reaching for a phone on the wall by the door.

A vise-like grip wrapped around me from behind, essentially trapping my arms.

"Brother, you have to stop!" Emmett hissed in my ear. "You can't…not here. They'll lock you up, man. You've _got_ to chill the fuck out."

I shook in my brother's strong hold, glaring at the floor. "He…James… He tried to _drug_ her?! He… Aro brought him there to…"

"Is she okay?" he asked roughly in my ear, and I nodded. "Then…you have to calm the fuck down. You tear this place apart, and you'll be arrested. You get arrested, and getting home will be out of the fucking question. Calm your shit, Edward!"

Jasper appeared in front of me, seemingly calm as ever, but I knew him. He was livid. His face reddened when he was pissed; his eyes were narrow and dark.

"Did… Did you say they tried to _drug_ Bella?" he asked, and I nodded. He turned to Alice. "I want a private plane home. Now. Nonstop, straight into Sea-Tac."

Alice nodded, pulling out her phone. "It'll probably take about an hour, but…"

"I'll pay extra if they hurry," he stated, looking back to me. "We'll get you home, Edward."

I glanced over my shoulder to my brother. "I'm okay."

"No, you aren't, but at least you won't rip shit off the walls," Tanya said from beside me once Emmett let me go, and she cupped my face when I nodded and straightened up. "Sit down. I'll get you something to drink."

I did as I was told, looking to Rose when she handed my phone back. She took a seat beside me, taking my hands in hers. "She's okay. I didn't talk to her. She's still with the cops, but her friend Harry is there, along with Garrett and Tori, and your dad…he's gonna watch over her until we get home. Okay?"

My hands balled up into fists. My jaw rolled with my gritted teeth. "I'm… I'mma kill a motherfucker."

"No, you aren't. You're gonna do exactly as I tell you," she stated, and there was something about her demeanor that was fucking frightening, so I nodded. "Good. We'll get home, and we'll go straight to Bella. You let _me_ worry about Aro and James. Clear?" When I opened my mouth, she shook her head. "I mean it. _I will handle it_."

I nodded and then glanced down at my phone when it buzzed in my hand. It was my dad's phone this time. "Dad, I…"

"You had to calm down. It's understandable. She's still with the police, son. But I promise you, she's okay."

I needed to talk to her, hear it from her sweet mouth that she was okay, but Alice announced across the room that she'd gotten us a private plane.

"You… Dad, I gotta go. We're taking a different flight. I'm… Listen, you tell my angel she should've kicked his ass, and let her know I'll be home by sunrise. Okay?"

"I will. I won't leave her side until you're home, champ."

Something about that statement put me at ease and caused a lump to form in my throat. I swallowed around it, whispering, "Thanks."

My ears were ringing, my head pounding as I was guided through every step to board the plane. I may have calmed down enough to push through the whole process, but my imagination was out of fucking control. The _what ifs_ were making me crazy. What if my dad hadn't been there? What if my sweet angel had actually taken a sip of whatever James had put in her cup? What if Aro was behind it? What if James had…

_Crack!_

"Give me that," Tanya sighed, snatching my phone out of my hand. "You're lucky it's just the case you just destroyed and not the screen. You can have it back when we land." She turned it over in her hands and shook her head at the large crack down the back of the case.

Smirking in spite of it all, I took a seat by a window. My forehead fell to it with a dull thump.

"Edward," Tanya called, taking the seat beside me, and Kate fell into the one in front of me. "I know you won't feel okay until you set eyes on her, but your dad's there, and she didn't actually…"

"I know!" I snapped, instantly regretting it, but she knew me well enough to realize I couldn't control my mouth right at that moment. "She's…" I shook my head slowly. "She's so fucking strong, but…" I swallowed nervously, gazing back out the window. "What if she hates me for bringing this shit on her?"

There went the motherfucking _what ifs_ again. I squeezed my eyes closed to quiet my head, but they just kept fucking coming.

"Edward, _no_," Kate said, sitting forward, cupping my face. "Look at me. No." She said it so firmly that I wanted to believe her. "That girl _loves_ you."

I nodded absentmindedly, turning to face the window again. Everyone left me alone after that. It was a long fucking flight but faster than had we taken the airline. Almost seven hours, but with going from the East Coast to the West, we gained time. I fell asleep at one point, simply out of pure exhaustion. The adrenaline from the show, my temper, and all my worries wore off quickly.

I woke up just about the time we touched down in Seattle, and my temper and my worry kicked right back up to the point I could barely see straight. We all separated at the airport, and I was aware that there were conversations around me. Rose was instantly on her phone to her uncle, trying to find out exactly what the police were going to do about James and Aro. She spoke quietly while Emmett guided me through the private hallways and finally out to the car service Rose had ready for us.

The ride was silent, except for the occasional sound of traffic. I could feel Rose's worried gaze, and Emmett was practically rocking in his seat. I, however, watched the city I loved blur by neighborhood by neighborhood, until we reached the one I needed most.

I didn't know what to expect so early in the morning…or late at night, depending on how I looked at it. Though, the throng of media was not even close to being on the list. And the very second they saw who pulled up outside the alleyway of Charlie's Pub, they were on us like white on rice.

_Masen! Are you here about James?_

_James was arrested earlier tonight, Masen… Will you be pressing charges?_

_Was there an altercation with Bella and James?_

"I'm gonna do more than press charges if I get my hands on James," I muttered under my breath as Emmett guided Rose and me past them to the back of the alley.

At the top of the stairs on Bella's landing was a giant of a man who rivaled that of my brother's size. He met us about halfway down, offering his hand to Rose.

"Felix," she greeted, placing her hand on my shoulder. "This is Masen…and his head of security you already know. Masen, this is the security guard Bella's hired."

Felix and I nodded to one another, but he turned to my brother.

"Felix," Emmett greeted. "What happened?"

The large man recounted the whole night, even Bella's worry that she should just let James and Aro stay, but my angel had been smart. She'd asked Felix to stay inside for the night, just in case. He told about my father, how he'd come to see my girl, and that Dad had watched over – and was still watching over – Bella through every single bit of it.

"Your dad, man," Felix huffed through a light laugh and a slow shake of his head. "Boy, he won't let a soul go near her. Not until you got here. As far as I know, he's crashed out on her sofa. Anyway, I decided to camp out right here. I don't think after all this shit that anyone will come near her, but…I wasn't taking chances."

"Felix, what were the charges?" Rose asked, and he wrinkled his nose.

"James was taken in, and Aro tried to deny knowing him, but Miss Bella put a stop to that shit. He…he tried to give her a roofie, so…I'm not sure what they'll charge him with. She didn't drink it, but it was damned close call."

I walked back down the stairs to the alley, my hands sinking into my hair. My temper renewed with a vengeance, and the closest thing I could take it out on was a garbage can. With a forceful kick, I sent the bastard into the brick wall of the bar, but it wasn't enough. I had to get this shit out of my system, or my ass would hunt down James and Aro and the result would be…bad. The sound of glass bottles meeting their demise against the unforgiving brick wasn't good enough. I kicked it again, only to reach for it with my hands. Before I could even lift it, much less throw it, arms locked around me again. These were different from Emmett but the same height.

"Champ, don't," Dad whispered in my ear. "Let go of it."

"I need—"

"I know, but you're forgetting who's watching, and you'll wake her up. I just got her to settle down."

"Why?" I spun to face him as Emmett and Felix rushed to the alleyway to stop the paps my noise had drawn in. I didn't give a damn about what they thought they were seeing.

He smiled sadly. "Because for some reason, she's worried about _you_."

"I need to see her," I said, pushing off him and brushing by Rose. I took the stairs two or three at a time. When I reached for the door knob, it escaped my grasp, and I was standing face to face with Bella, who had tears streaming down her face. "Angel," I sighed in relief and heartbreak at that beautiful face in pain. Instantly, I had her in my arms, and I kicked the door closed behind me. Setting her on the kitchen table, I buried my face in the crook of her neck.

"Edward," she sobbed, her grip on my shirt almost ripping the damn fabric.

"Shh, baby," I soothed her, pulling back just enough to shrug out of my jacket. "Let me see you." Cupping her face, my heart broke that she wouldn't look at me.

"I…I…I messed up, Edward."

"You did _nothing fucking wrong_, angel. I promise you," I vowed.

"Aro and…and…James," she said through hiccups and sniffles. "They… I…"

I kissed her hard. "Nothing, Bella. You didn't do anything wrong."

"He's…_so fucking mad_, Edward!" she yelled, her face dissolving into tears again. "He's… You've got…_months_ left!"

I laughed almost in giddy relief, shaking my head. I couldn't help it. "Is that what you're worried about? Really?" Scooping her up into my arms, I walked her to her sofa and fell down with her cradled on my lap. Just having her in my arms after weeks of missing her like fucking crazy made everything else seem insignificant. "Listen to me, angel," I whispered against her temple as she snuggled in as close as she could. "Nothing he could do to me could be worse than something happening to _you_. Do you fucking understand that?"

She nodded, gripping my shirt at the shoulder in her fist.

"Fuck, angel, you're shaking," I continued softly against her skin, raking my fingers through her hair. "You're okay, and you're right here. If I have to kidnap you and take you with me from this point on, I will." I smiled against her cheek when a sniffly laugh escaped her. "I'll do it, too. Don't think I won't!" I growled dramatically into her neck just to make her squeak, then squirm.

She finally sat up to look at me, and I couldn't help but shift us until we were slouched down, stomach to stomach on that sofa. Reaching up, I wiped away her needless tears.

"God, I missed you," I breathed, shaking my head at the truth, despite all the shit. "Don't you worry about me, Bella. There's nothing that could fuck with me except losing you."

"I love you," she said, pressing her lips to mine. She placed her hands on either side of my face. "I think… I'm pretty sure they were trying to make me look like I was cheating…_with James_!"

Nodding, I frowned but kissed her lips. "I think you're right, but… You're okay. That's all I care about. I'll deal with their shit later…or Rose will. They _will_ regret what they've done, angel."

I swiped my thumbs beneath her eyes. "You look so fucking tired. Please, just…let me hold you. Okay? We'll do the reunion shit the right way tomorrow."

She smiled and nodded, settling in on my chest. She was straddling my lap but pressed to me chest to chest, stomach to stomach. My girl was a petite thing, so holding her like that was easy.

I wasn't sure she took ten breaths before she was out like a damn light. Her face was buried into the crook of my neck like she couldn't get close enough, and her hands twitched as they clung to me. I heard her door crack open, and I glanced up to see my dad, Emmett, and Rose step into the room. Emmett set my bags down in the kitchen.

"She okay?" Rose asked in a whisper, and I nodded, refusing to get up or move a fucking inch.

Dad took a seat on the coffee table in front of us, his eyes warm but worried. "I tried to tell her you were more worried about her than whatever Aro may do, but…I think she just needed to hear it from you."

I nodded, pressing a kiss to her hair, but I met his worried gaze. I studied his face. Hell, I studied every bit of him, and he looked like I remembered him as a kid. Actually, he looked better. His skin was clear and not so sallow, and his eyes were sharp, despite the worry he had for the girl in my arms. He'd busted his damn ass to get there, too. It most certainly wouldn't go unnoted. He kept telling me that _he _owed _me._ But as I ran a hand over Bella's head and down her back, I didn't give a damn about the past.

"We're even," I stated, kissing her hair again when his shocked gaze met mine. I nodded again. "Bella told me you wanted to make it up to me for the accident, but… What you did…for her…for me… We're even. I'll gladly carry the DUI for her. I don't give a shit what's real or what's…or what's what. I… What you did…"

He gripped my shoulder when he stood up, then ruffled my hair before placing a hand on Bella's back. "I'd do it again. I'll be upstairs if you need me."

Nodding, I buried my nose in Bella's hair.

Rose kissed my forehead, whispering. "Felix will be parked in the alleyway if you need anything. I'll um… I'll check in tomorrow with whatever news I find."

The door clicked closed, and I held Bella right there for a few minutes. The sun would be coming up soon, but I knew my girl needed sleep. Finally, I stood up with her in my arms and tucked her into bed. I locked the door, kicked off my boots and jeans, and then yanked my shirt off over my head. When I crawled into bed beside her, she scooted back into my arms. There was more to deal with come morning, but for now, I had my angel back.

**~oOo~**

Despite the fact that I'd slept on the plane on the way home, I crashed out holding Bella. The sun was just barely peeking up when my eyes fell closed. It felt like I'd only been asleep for minutes, but I knew it was longer than that. The sunlight beaming in through her windows started to bring me around, and I was aware of the scent that I'd been missing for way too fucking long and the sounds of phones vibrating somewhere I couldn't quite focus on. Slowly, I became aware of touches to my face, hair, chest, and…lower, which made my whole being come alive when the touches slid beneath the waistband of my underwear.

I hissed when a warm, strong hand wrapped around my cock – which apparently had been seeking out Bella all on his own, not that I could help that.

"Angel…" I groaned, barely able to crack my eyes open enough before my head pressed back into the pillow. "Baby, I… Fuck…"

"Mm, gladly," I heard in my ear, which made me smile and huff a light laugh, despite how good she was making me feel.

She shifted on the bed, letting go of my dick, which made me almost protest until I actually took a look at her. My girl was ridding herself of the clothes she'd been in – T-shirt, sleep pants, and underwear were all dropped off the side of the bed. She pulled down the covers in order to reach for my underwear, which I gladly helped her with, and I groaned loudly when she straddled me.

There was a desperation in her expression, her movements, and her sounds. To watch her eyes roll back into her head as she took me inside her just about made me come right there.

"Fuck, I missed you," she breathed, leaning over me as she started to move – up, down…over and over.

"Mm, angel, I can tell," I grunted with a smile I couldn't stop, reaching out to touch everywhere – up her sides, across those gloriously pierced nipples, and around to her ass in order to guide her, move with her. Keeping one hand on her ass, I slid the other into her hair, gripping the way she liked it in order to kiss the ever-loving shit out of her.

Her hands groped and gripped almost painfully, and I sat up, wrapping her legs around me. A desperate whimper escaped her, and my brow wrinkled.

Dragging my lips to her neck, up to her ear, I said, "I've got you, baby. You know that, right?"

When she didn't answer me, I brushed my lips against the sensitive skin of her throat, nipping a little. Hands flattened on either side of my face, bringing my gaze to hers and her forehead to meet mine. She was shaky and her eyes fierce, but her hips moved slowly, languidly with mine.

"Edward, I…" A whimper escaped her, and it was soft and tapered off as she continued to move over me, using my shoulders for leverage.

I let go of her ass, holding her face in both hands, and I nipped at her lips as our hips moved in sync. "Just…feel me. Okay?"

"Don't let go."

"Never."

I knew what this was. I could see her fear of the same fucking _what ifs_ I'd been plagued with on the flight home. All sorts of shit could've gone wrong. It didn't, but it could have, and she was consoling herself…in us.

Wrapping an arm around her waist, I rolled us over so we were across her bed, but my girl wrapped everything she had around me as I leaned in to kiss her. I kept my movements slow but deep, letting her feel me and pressing her down into the bed.

"Better?" I whispered against her lips, and she nodded.

"I missed you," she murmured against my jaw, and I slipped my fingers up her arm to her hand on my face, lacing our fingers together and pressing them into the mattress by her head.

"God, I missed you," I whispered, dragging my lips down her cheek. "I love you, angel. Nothing will ever change that."

"Love you," she whimpered, threading her fingers into my hair. "Edward, please… I'm…"

Biting down on my bottom lip, I thrust harder, my thumb seeking out the spot that I knew would send her over the edge. She fought it and fought it, until I applied just enough pressure to her clit that caused her to spiral out of control. I rode out her orgasm, keeping her hand in mine when she squeezed hard as she came.

Everything about her pulled me in – her gripping hands, her strong legs wrapped around me, and her still-fluttering pussy. It all caused me to lose it sooner than I would've liked.

"Fuck," I panted, my forehead falling to hers, and we locked gazes for a moment. "Angel, look at me," I begged her, still breathing heavily. Those long eyelashes swept up, and dark, worried brown gazed back at me. "You okay?"

She sighed, her whole body seeming to relax beneath me. "Yeah, I just…needed you."

Smiling a little at that, I leaned down. "Anytime, anywhere… I'd fly you to the moon and back. You just say the words, okay?"

Bella nodded but pulled me down to kiss me softly, and I could feel a touch of a smile there.

I desperately needed her laugh, though, to know that she was really okay, so I rolled us onto our sides, finally separating us. Groaning, I grimaced a little. "My hand is a poor fucking substitute when I don't have you."

Her giggle made my fucking day, considering how frantic she was just a few minutes prior. "No shit," she said through that adorable laugh.

I pushed up on my hands and loomed over her, but the thought of her…and her own hand. "Jesus, I can't even with the thought of you…" My forehead fell to her shoulder, and I allowed more of my weight on her, not that it stopped her from laughing at me. "I'd kill some-damn-body to see that."

She cracked the fuck up, pushing at me until I rolled to the side again. "Shut up, Edward!" she said, still laughing.

"You think I'm kidding," I mumbled, flinching when a pillow came from nowhere and popped the side of my head. Grinning, I stopped the next assault, pulling her close. We were at the opposite end of the bed now, but I kissed her. "A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, I guess."

She smiled against my lips but pulled back so she could rake her fingers through my hair. "I love you. And I'm… I'm sorry about last night."

I was shaking my head before she'd even finished that needless apology. "I'm just…" I sighed, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "We need to discuss this, don't we?" I asked, and when she nodded but pointed toward the bathroom, I sat up, pulling my underwear back on. Something about this conversation required clothing. And I wasn't the only one who seemed to feel that way; Bella returned with my T-shirt and a pair of underwear on. Leaning against the headboard, I opened my arms for her.

Straddling my lap, she explained everything that had happened, from my dad's arrival, to Felix's warning over Aro and James, to me showing up and destroying a garbage can in the alley. All of it. And I could see that today, her mood had shifted from scared to very pissed off. And she should be livid.

"I just… I lost it, Edward!" she told me, looking down at my arms, her fingers trailing along my ink like she did when she was worried or nervous. "I knew when they got there that I should've just ignored them, that letting them stay was easier than whatever they could do to you. But…they came there with every intention of making me…of doing… They wanted to show you I was cheating…with James! I just…I snapped because Aro tried to play all innocent, and then…then… He said…"

"What'd he fucking say, angel?"

"He said… That I was just your current toy, that I'd get thrown away for your next…n-next whore."

"Get up," I stated, lifting her up off my lap so I could pace. I gripped my hair. "Did you believe him?" I asked slowly, softly.

"No."

My head spun to meet her honest gaze, and I nodded. "Good, because he's fucking full of shit!"

"I know. I told him that we'd see about it when you were home."

Home. Her voice wavered on the word, and I knelt in front of her as she sat on the edge of the bed. "I love you," I stated firmly, practically shaking her to make sure she understood how serious I was. "And he's…" My nostrils flared, and I swallowed back the verbal venom I wanted to spew. "I promised Rose I'd stay away from him, and…she said she'd handle it. I want to know what _you_ want."

"Wait, baby… There's more." Her nose wrinkled, and she fidgeted under my gaze. "I also…kinda… I… I may have sort of told him to go fuck himself."

Grinning, I nodded. "I know. I heard you when I was on the phone with Dad."

Her wide eyes glanced up at me, and she smirked a little. "You're really not mad at me?"

"Christ, no," I soothed her, rubbing the outside of her smooth thighs. "No, angel." I shook my head. "I told you last night… There's nothing he can do to me that could be worse than something happening to you, Bella. That's the truth. I don't know what's going to happen with him or James, but I'm telling you right now, there isn't a rumor he could spread or threat he could make that… Jesus, Bella…I heard you over the phone. I… Do you have _any fucking idea_ what would've happened had they succeeded?! Had they actually fucking _touched you_?!" I yelled, immediately regretting it when she crumbled. "Shit, shit… Shhh, angel. I'm sorry."

Crawling back up on the bed, I gathered her up in my arms, holding her close. I hated the tears. I hated that my strong girl was so angry, so scared, that she was this emotional. I needed to fix this shit.

The sound of phones vibrating somewhere met my ears again. I pressed kisses to Bella's forehead. "That's probably Rose, baby. She's gonna want to see us today."

Bella nodded, sitting up a little. "Okay." She swiped at her face. "When do you… What day is your flight out?"

My brow furrowed. "Tuesday. We have four days."

Bella's face darkened, but she nodded again and got up when our phones vibrated again. She grabbed hers from the nightstand, reading the screen.

"You're right. Rose does want to see us." She looked to me. "All of us."

I raked a hand through my hair, nodding, only to fall back to the bed, my legs hanging off the side. "Okay. Ask her when and where."

"Soon…and my bar. She wants your dad, as well as Tori and Garrett, there. She's bringing Jenks."

"Damn, okay. I'll go see Dad," I told her, sitting up and grabbing for my jeans from the night before. Yanking up the zipper, I caught Bella's stare, and I tilted my head. "Angel?" I whispered, walking to her to cup that sweet face. "I also meant something else I said last night. If…" I paused, kissing her lips, which I simply couldn't resist. "If you want out of here, if you want to come with me, then you are _more_ than welcome, Bella. I said I'd kidnap you, but…" I grinned at her giggle, kissing her again. "Just tell me."

She nodded but didn't answer me. "I want to know what Rose found out."

"Fair enough, baby," I told her honestly. I didn't want to force Bella into anything, but I also wanted to make sure no one fucking touched my girl again.

**~oOo~**

I took a seat at one of the tables in Charlie's. We'd shoved a few together, simply because it seemed there was a shit-ton of people coming. I sat so I could keep an eye on Bella. She was cleaning up a bit from the night before, where they'd all left shit and closed down after the ugly events.

Bella and Tori were quiet while money was counted, beer mugs were washed and put away, and while we waited for everyone to arrive. Felix paced by the front door until my brother finally set a hand on his broad shoulder.

"Go home, man. I've got this. Trust me," my brother stated firmly, smiling when Felix shot a worried glance toward Bella. His loyalty did not go unnoticed, and I owed him for it. "If she needs you, I'll call you myself, but you've been here all damn night."

Felix nodded, giving Emmett a weary smile and a wave Bella's way before walking out the door.

Garrett showed up next, along with Harry Clearwater, which surprised me. What surprised me even more were the marks on their knuckles. Garrett smirked when he caught my stare.

"Aro…may have had himself an accident on the way to his car last night," he muttered softly on his way by me to join the girls behind the bar.

Harry huffed a humorless laugh, taking a seat by me. "How's our girl?" he whispered.

"Pissed. Quiet. All over the place." My answers came readily, but I looked over at him, and he nodded. "What'd you do to Aro?"

His smile was slow, evil. "I know he's…"

"He's an asshole, and had I been here, I'd be sitting in a jail cell next to James for completely different fucking reasons, Harry, so… What?"

Harry's face flashed a quick grin. "Oh, we may have told him he wasn't really welcome to Charlie's anymore."

I could tell he wasn't going to reveal exactly what had gone down, and he was giving me a look that told me I was probably better off not knowing.

"Charlie…" He huffed a laugh. "That man fucking adored Dizzy I loved him like a brother, so…I don't particularly feel guilty for anything said or done last night. Let's put it that way. Hmm?"

The sound of glass breaking made both of us jump, but Bella's fiery temper was aimed at Garrett, along with what I would've sworn was the broken handle of a beer mug. "Have you lost your fucking mind, Gare?! As if I didn't make shit worse, you go and…and…"

Garrett shrugged and smirked, completely unapologetic. And probably for the first time since I'd met Bella's ex-boyfriend, we were on the same damn page. Getting up from my chair, I walked to them, giving Garrett a nod of respect, but I wrapped my arms around my girl from behind.

"Drop the weapon, angel. I can't say that he was wrong."

"Fuck!" she threw the handle, and it landed perfectly into the large garbage can at the end of the bar. "You… You assholes and your fucking testosterone. The man still owns you, Edward!" she snapped, and despite it all, I snorted.

"You think it's funny?" She rounded on me, that temper of hers hot and sparking, and fuck, she was gorgeous…but scary.

Suddenly, I sobered up. "No, angel, I don't. I can't find a single fucking thing about this entire situation funny! I can't see that drugging my girlfriend in order to render her helpless has any fucking humor in it at all. I can't see how anything about you letting this shit break you is funny. I do, however, have no problem – _none_ – with any sort of action taken against the man behind it. Had _I _been here, he wouldn't have made it to his precious fucking Aston Martin, much less have had the ability to drive home. So if that makes me an asshole, then so be it. But I'm telling you…nothing Aro can or will do scares me."

"How can you even say that? You have _months_ left!" she argued, and despite the fact that the bar was filling up with just about everyone we knew, she needed to know.

"What? What's the worst he can do? I'm his fucking walking, talking, dancing, singing monkey, Bella. I told you that before. I'm his Aston Martin payment, his mansion mortgage, and his personal beautician and masseuse. Without me, those things go away, or he'll need to find another fucking monkey.

"He can spread all the damn rumors and untruths that he can conjure up beneath that creepy fucking ponytail. What's the worst he could say? That I'm…I'm sleeping around with every woman in the Pacific Northwest…or the damn world for that matter? That…That…not even a year out of rehab and I'm drinking and partying? Seriously? So what? It's expected of _Masen_ for all that shit! He can spread whatever, but as long as the people in this room know the truth, the reality, then I couldn't give a good goddamn!" I gestured behind me, where it seemed the whole band had arrived, along with Tanya, Kate, my father, and Jenks. "I just don't. I'm done. I've been done for ages. I was completely finished the very second he decided to smash my ex-girlfriend into my face simply because I didn't agree with his creative ideas. But the fact that he walked in here, dared to threaten you, and almost…" My nostrils flared as I shook my head slowly, biting down hard on my bottom lip. "Angel, he's lucky to still be breathing right now. You have no idea…"

"Edward…" Bella shifted uneasily on her feet, looking apologetic, and I pulled her to me, putting my lips to her ear.

"Don't. Don't apologize. Don't you dare," I whispered. "We just have to figure out how to get through the next six months, angel. You didn't mess up, you didn't make shit any worse than it already was, and you most certainly don't owe me anything. It's just…_bullshit_." I grinned at the last word when it reminded her of our very first conversation, and I heard a small laugh escape her. "I love you," I continued softly in her ear. "I love you, and I'm grateful that you're okay. Anything after that is insignificant, Bella. You wanna be mad, then aim it at someone besides yourself…or the people that came to your defense when I wasn't here to do it myself. Okay? Please?"

"Okay," she mumbled into my neck.

"Promise me," I begged her softly.

She pulled back, but I pressed my forehead to hers when she nodded. "Promise."

"Thank you. Now…let's see what they found out, hmm?"

Bella nodded but kissed my lips softly as we turned to face the group of people at the table. It was time to face what we needed to do in order to rid ourselves of Volturi Records for good.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Aro had himself an "accident" on the way to his car. ;) Edward had to see his girl. And this meeting coming up is pretty damn big, so it had to split off into the next chapter.**

**No real questions, though most of you have theories on what this incident could mean for everyone. Some of you are right-**_**ish**_**, as in you're close. **

**Next update will be Sunday. All the pics and playlists are in their usual spots. Until next time… Mooches, Deb ;) **


	23. I Dub Thee Unforgiven

**A/N… I want to wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day…whether it's fur-kids, human kids, or that big kid you married…or hell, all of the above. ;) Enjoy your day; you've earned it. **

**I know you guys are itchin' for this meeting, so I won't hold you up here. Please see me at the bottom…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 23 – I Dub Thee Unforgiven**

_With time the child draws in,  
This whipping boy done wrong.  
Deprived of all his thoughts  
The young man struggles on and on he's known  
A vow unto his own,  
That never from this day  
His will they'll take away._

_What I've felt,  
What I've known  
Never shined through in what I've shown.  
Never be.  
Never see.  
Won't see what might have been._

_What I've felt,  
What I've known  
Never shined through in what I've shown.  
Never free.  
Never me.  
So I dub thee unforgiven._

"_Unforgiven" – Metallica _

**EDWARD**

We faced the tables that were now completely full, and Bella walked to hug her brother, who was looking pretty pissed off, but I could see he was just simply relieved she was okay. He spoke softly to her, and she answered him with a small smile and nod.

I wasn't sure what to expect from this meeting, but I was prepared for just about anything. The only thing I wanted to make sure of was that Bella was protected in my absence. Outside of that, I didn't give a shit what I had to do for the next six months.

Giving a quick head count, I could see only one person wasn't there.

"Where's Alec?" I asked, taking a seat next to my father and pulling Bella to my lap.

"With Carrie," Rose replied with a smirk. "She's close. He's out of the tour…for now, anyway."

"Okay, so we need a keyboardist," Jasper stated with a nod. "Did you call in—"

"I'm…reluctant to call anyone in from the studio," Rose stated firmly, glancing around the table. "So…we have a lot to cover. However, the temp keyboard player is the least of our worries, so let's get started."

Rose's uncle sat forward, and I smirked at the ruthless bastard. Honestly, he was a pitbull of a lawyer. And he adored his niece, for which we were all grateful, never mind that taking us on as his clients had made him a shit-ton of money. Therefore, his loyalty could not be swayed. Ever.

He was a large man, with sharp eyes and a round face, and he slapped down a notebook and pen. He also pulled his laptop closer, only to look at his watch.

"Jenks, please tell me you've figured some shit out that will help us," Jasper stated slowly, folding his arms across his chest as he kicked back in his chair. "Despite the fact that this occurred here, after Bella has been so gracious to allow us to film here, but this happened specifically toward her. Never mind that she didn't deserve it, but because she's with Edward, she's now one of us, so I feel personally…attacked, J-man, so…"

"It was a personal attack. And we're gonna use that against Aro," Jenks answered sharply. He pulled a stack of papers out of his briefcase and set them down on the table. "Since neither the music industry nor Aro have morals, there is no morals clause in your contract. However, I made sure when you guys originally signed this thing in the beginning that should Aro be unable to do his job, another executive would take over."

He sighed, smiling a bit. "You boys signed a decent contract. It was an excellent start for a new band; there were only a few things that Volturi insisted upon, and we fiddled with them until everyone was happy. Aro wanted control of the albums – what was on them and how they were listed. He also wanted control of marketing, and despite how he's manipulated certain aspects of your personal lives via the media, he hasn't broken the contract, but neither have you. Everyone made money, the band has gone well beyond what had been expected, and your reputations in the music community are phenomenal.

"Now…" he sighed, flipping through our old contract. "Now we've reached a snag. As you may or may not know, Volturi Records was started by two brothers. Aro and Caius. Caius prefers the quieter side of the industry – money management, marketing, and…_contract negotiations_." He smiled at that last one. "I know, as your lawyer, that Radiant Eclipse will not be re-signing with Volturi Records. In fact, I've as much as said so to Caius. And…I've told him why. What he doesn't know is I'll be filing not one but _two_ restraining orders against both James and Aro."

"For who?" I asked, but I was pretty sure I knew what his answer would be.

"Isabella Swan."

Bella stiffened in my arms, and I merely held her closer, rubbing the outside of her thigh to soothe her, saying, "Good. At least she'll be safe."

There were murmurs of agreement around the table, which made Bella fall quiet.

"Exactly," Jenks stated. "It's already done. James Allen, should he be bailed out of county, and Aro Volturi won't be able to come within a hundred feet of Isabella Swan or her place of residence." He smirked, looking directly at me with a raised eyebrow. "Which just so happens to be your place of residence, as well, Masen."

Grinning, I nodded and looked to Bella. Something about that bit of information made my angel puff up a bit with a prideful smile. I couldn't help but chuckle at my protective girl.

He checked his watch again, then his phone. "I'm waiting on one more person…" he muttered, glancing up when there was a knock on the door of the bar.

Emmett stood and cracked the door open, only to open it a little wider to allow someone to come in. I recognized him instantly.

"You can't be fucking serious!" I snapped, starting to push Bella to her feet so I could stand up, but the man who'd just joined us held up his hand. When Bella turned to look my way, I sneered in his direction. "Bella, meet Caius…Volturi. Aro's brother. They started Volturi Records together."

Her eyebrows shot up, but she watched the man in question take a seat next to Rose. He was almost the complete opposite of Aro – blond hair, feminine features, casual clothes. Though he had the same hardened gaze as Aro, it wasn't evil, just…angry, most likely at the situation.

There were murmurs around the table, but Jenks glanced down to Caius. "Thank you for joining us, Mr. Volturi."

Caius rolled his eyes. "Only my brother likes to be called that. Please call me Caius."

Jenks nodded once. "I'm surprised you came without a lawyer, Caius."

He was shaking his head. "I _am_ a lawyer, Jason. I don't need one present. And I…" He sighed deeply, rubbing his temple. "I'm well aware of my brother's actions, so if we could please just get on with it."

The man sounded tired, embarrassed, and his voice was softer than his brother's.

Jenks looked his way for a moment before flipping through his notes. "I called this informal meeting because I feel my client's contract was breached," he stated, looking over at Caius's impassive face. "If you'll allow me to let a few witnesses explain what happened last night with Aro…"

"Well, since my brother won't exactly explain the details to me, I have no choice," Caius stated.

Jenks turned to me. "Masen, as hard as it's going to be to hear it again, I need to know – from the people present last night – exactly what had happened with Aro and James. So I need you to please stay calm. I understand your…anger, but in order to proceed, I need to hear it."

Nodding, I dropped a kiss to Bella's shoulder. "Carry on, man."

For the next few minutes, he listened to Bella, Dad, and Tori, even Garrett and Harry. The only one who wasn't there was Felix, but he'd watched over us all damn night, and when Rose mentioned that to Jenks, he waved it off.

"It's fine. I can talk to him later, if we need it." He set his sharp gaze on Harry. "What exactly did you say to Aro before—" he smirked a little "—before you escorted him personally from the bar?"

Garrett and Harry froze for a moment, shooting a glance to Caius, who smiled a little, but it was Harry who spoke. "I know Aro. I know what he can and will do to musicians. He essentially finds talent and bleeds them dry. I'm not saying he's not good at his job, but he pushes his clients to the point of exhaustion. Charlie…" He pointed around the bar at all the memorabilia from Chainsaw Charlie's career. "Charlie knew him. Worked with him a couple of times but never signed a contract. Charlie was my good friend, my brother, and he stopped me once from signing with Volturi. No offense, Caius," he added, and the blond man merely nodded. "And I simply showed him a taste of what would happen should he come anywhere near Bella again."

Jenks studied the older man, and then he nodded once. "Fair enough. Now…James Allen has been charged with possession of rohypnol, which carries the possible fine of up to five thousand dollars and jail time up to three years. He's being held with a pretty low bail, but no one has yet to go get him."

"Aw, hell…" Emmett groaned, shaking his head. "So…Aro uses James to his bidding but won't bail his boy out? That's cold, dude."

"James is under my brother's employ, not Volturi Records," Caius corrected. "When it was brought to me that he had broken his nondisclosure agreement with our biggest name, I released him from Volturi. My brother, however, kept him around for what he said were personal reasons."

I wanted to laugh at the expression on Caius's face. It was pure disgust and maybe a little disbelief.

"I'm here to assure Caius that Radiant Eclipse has every intention of fulfilling every bit of their contract, until the very end. However, once I've spoken to the police and James, I'm fairly certain that Aro will not be able to meet _his_ end of the contract. He will be unable to do his duties as your producer…from jail."

"What exactly do you think you have on my brother?" Caius asked, leaning forward.

"Conspiracy." The word came unhindered from Jenks, and he smiled. "Oh, yeah. James's contract with Radiant Eclipse may be over, but it wasn't over with Aro. If your brother abandons him now, that little weasel will scream…and scream loud. Not that it will get him far; he still attempted to drug someone, never mind who told him to do it. He's still facing those charges, no matter what."

"My brother will claim he had no idea what James was up to, Jason, and you know it. That they were merely out together seeing a musical act," Caius countered, but there was no animosity behind it, just the simple truth.

"I'm sure. However, if he ignores James, then the whole world will know."

"I will handle James, I assure you," Caius vowed, almost in a hiss. "However, threatening my brother is useless. You have no leg to stand on."

"Actually, we do," Jenks countered calmly. "All that my clients are asking for is the removal of Aro Volturi as their Volturi Records representative. Per the contract that everyone signed four years ago, you can reassign someone else to Radiant Eclipse, should Aro be deemed unable to perform his duties. He will be wrapped up in James's legal problems for quite some time. End of story." He smiled at Caius. "You and I both know that there will be no re-signing, but release Aro from Radiant Eclipse, and there won't be any going public, either. Everyone stays happy. Otherwise, I'm going to the real press with this entire story.

"The problem with that, though, means _every-damn-body_ will be involved and several shows will have to be cancelled. No one wants that. Everyone sitting at this table merely wants this contract over and done."

"And I will sue you for going against the non-disclosures that you've all signed!" Caius snapped back.

"There are five people at this table who've not signed a damn thing, Caius," Jenks argued, his face reddening. "They have, however, been a witness to and a victim of your brother's actions. They were innocent in it all, simply in the wrong place and wrong time, and I'd be willing to bet they'd speak on Radiant Eclipse's behalf! And they would be completely free to do so. I believe I have a list of journalists who would _love_ to hear this story."

Caius scanned the table, most likely sizing up who had or hadn't signed a nondisclosure contract. One of them was perched on my lap, glaring daggers at him with dark, angry eyes. And he countered her gaze with his own.

"Caius!" I snapped, and the whole table jumped. "We're not asking for anything other than for Aro to leave us the fuck alone! That's it. I had every intention of finishing our contract with you, but I'm telling you…I fucking _promise _you, that asshole comes anywhere near me, anyone in this room, or…oh my fucking God, if he even _looks_ Bella's way… He won't walk away with some simple bruises and scratches. I'll put his ass in the hospital, and I won't be the only one."

Garrett and Harry nodded a little, but it was Mike who sat forward. "That was my _sister_ he tried to hurt. I realize I'm new, but…she's my family. I'll kill him."

"Mikey…" Bella sighed, shaking her head, but I patted her thigh to soothe her.

Caius shook his head. "You only have until the end of the tour… And I'm telling you, my brother will never see the inside of a jail cell."

"I can…and will force this clause," Jenks stated, pointing to our contract. "As of this morning, there is an order of protection against your brother and James Allen on this bar, the apartments behind it, and the owner, Isabella Swan. I'm sure the boys here would completely agree with me that this makes an absolute _perfect_ meeting place for the band. Which means your brother can neither attend the meetings nor do his job." Jenks's tone was laced with sarcasm and menace. He meant that shit.

"There are other places to meet. My brother could join the band on the road."

"Not if I go with them." Bella's voice was firm, her gaze fierce as she raised an eyebrow at him. "If I go, he can't come within a hundred feet of me…no matter _who_ I'm with…"

My head spun to look at her, and my girl was pissed, not at me but at the entire situation. She linked her fingers with mine, turning back to Caius. The mere _idea_ of her coming on the road with us was too good to wish for, and I couldn't quite tell if she was only threatening or if she meant it. As protective as Bella could be, it wouldn't shock me if she came along just to keep Aro at bay. And she wasn't finished with Caius, either.

"Look, I get all this shit… Contracts, nondisclosures, and whatever. I realize everyone has a job to do. I also realize that as an outsider, I have no vote or say. But as a woman?!" she exclaimed, shaking her head. "Your brother and James had every intention of drugging me, possibly assaulting me, if only to exploit it, and if you don't think I won't sit down with someone and let the world know exactly what happened in my bar last night, then you've sorely underestimated me. I despise the media for the things they did to my father, for the things they continue to do to…Masen, but I'm telling you now, I will tell everyone who will listen."

Jenks looked at Bella like he could kiss her, but he pushed the contract Caius's way. "We don't want to break the contract, Caius; we're merely requesting another representative from Volturi. That's it. What happens between you and your brother…or even the authorities…is none of our concern, though Bella has a point. Had someone not stepped in last night," he continued, giving my father a nod, "then we'd really have some ugly shit to deal with. As it is, our request isn't all that hard to grant. I don't want to force your hand, but obviously I will if I have to."

The man in question was quiet for a moment or two, finally leaning forward to rub his eyes with the heels of his hands. "Maybe my brother needs to retire," he mumbled behind his hands. "He's brought me more trouble than he's brought us clients." He pulled his hands away from his face. "Actually, he's put all his efforts into Radiant Eclipse." Caius sighed again, shaking his head. "Fine, done. I'll remove him as your rep."

Quiet cheers ran the length of the tables, and Bella practically collapsed against me. I hugged her tightly from behind, pressing kisses to her cheek.

Caius glared at Jenks for a moment, but his gaze raked across the table to me. He sniffed, wearing a small smile. "I was the one who saw you first. Not my brother. Radiant Eclipse was playing a gig across town in a small bar." He huffed a laugh, shaking his head. "I knew what we could do for you. I dragged my brother to see your next show. He approached you without my knowing." He sighed deeply. "Somewhere along the way, my brother forgot why we started Volturi Records. It used to be about the music, the talent. Now…he only sees the money." He stood up from the table, straightening his shirt.

"I'm sorry you won't be re-signing with us," he stated directly to me. "If I thought I could change your mind, I'd start negotiating now, but I'm pretty sure I'd run into a brick wall. You've outgrown my brother's archaic ideas, he's abused his position with you, and you've established yourselves as a band that could – and probably will – hold their own. I hope that works for you." He smiled ruefully. "I wish you success, if only that it will teach my brother a rather…hefty lesson."

He turned to Rose. "You'll finish out the contract with me, personally. Should you need anything, please call me or my secretary."

"Yes, sir," she replied. "Before you go, I have a question… There's the media to contend with, Caius. They know of James's arrest, and they've seen Masen arrive. We…"

"Yes." He narrowed his gaze to the floor. "My brother's made a mess of that, as well. He has too many 'friends' in the media, but he forgets that I do, too. I will attend to James Allen and see to it he stays quiet. I trust you, Mrs. Cullen, to come up with a vague blanket statement that keeps everyone involved safe from journalistic…harm," he worded carefully, but he wore a sly smirk on his face.

"I… I think I can come up with something that will appease everyone involved."

"And Heidi Summers?" Bella asked suddenly before Caius could leave, glancing over her shoulder to me. "She's been seen with James, so she's going to…"

Jenks laughed. "It would seem Heidi has moved permanently to Los Angeles."

"Figures," Tanya scoffed. "Let me guess… The bitch can't be reached for comment. It's the rehab incident all over again. Stupid fuck bucket."

Grinning, I hid it into Bella's shoulder, which was shaking a little with her laughter.

"I said she moved, not that she can't be reached," Jenks stated with authority.

"Good to know," Caius stated. "Miss Summers will be subtly reminded that her involvement the day of the video shoot has not been forgotten. If I'm not mistaken, Mr. Milton, the director, has already warned his friends in L.A. about her." He nodded once Jenks way. "We'll be in touch, Jason," he said before leaving the bar.

Bella and I locked gazes for a moment, but my dad, who had been listening intently throughout the entire meeting, sat forward.

"Mr. Jenks, I'm aware that I'm an outsider, and I know I'm ignorant of some things regarding this business, so… What does that mean for my boys?" he asked warily, but he seemed pretty damned concerned.

"It means that thanks to Aro's involvement last night, the band will no longer be under his control. Whether or not the authorities can pin anything on him or not is yet to be seen, but according to Radiant Eclipse's contract signed almost four years ago, Aro will be too busy to perform his duties, thereby releasing himself…or really, Caius will take over."

A low whistle met the air from Harry. "Boy oh boy, remind me to never piss you guys off, especially Dizzy Izzy here." He shot my girl a wink and a playful punch to her chin, which made her laugh softly.

Jenks cracked a smile. "Just doing my job."

"So…wait!" Bella piped up, glancing at me and then back to my lawyer. "So…Aro can't hurt them anymore? He can't…punish them?"

"No, ma'am, not if I have anything to say about it. As much as I hate what was done to you last night, it actually worked out for the best. Working with Aro was a miserable experience, but he wanted the band, so I had to do the best I could. I'm not completely unaware that Masen's relationship with Heidi Summers boosted sales for the last album, which was what Aro was banking on again, but unfortunately, it didn't work out the same this time."

Her relieved giggle erupted out of her, and it lightened up the whole room. I couldn't help but pull her to me, mumbling about close fucking calls and beautiful brunettes with sharp tempers.

"You'll be the death of me yet, angel."

She laughed but kept her arms around me when we faced the table.

"Okay, so…now here's where my job comes into play," Rose stated seriously. "With Aro out of the picture, the media will lose their 'source.' With James's arrest here at Bella's, they're gonna be like sharks drawn to blood. We need to position ourselves as a united front. You two," she continued, pointing toward Bella and me. "You will most likely be the target of a lot of questions and curiosity. They're gonna watch your every move, every step. Your fans love you…as in, they love the fact that you're together. They're still calling you 'Rock's Royal Couple,' but that's the fans. The media will look for other shit – cheating, partying, Heidi, and so on – so watch yourselves. If you need protection, I suggest you take Felix with you. Keep him here when you're working, that sort of thing."

Bella and I nodded, and the tension between us prior to the meeting completely evaporated.

"Okay," Jasper sang, wearing his lazy-ass smile. "Ding dong, the asshole's gone…"

He grinned when we all laughed, but a feeling of something easy, something light seemed to fill the room. Without Aro's manipulative ways, the rest of the tour would be nothing, just long and tedious. And we all seemed to feel it. I wanted to fucking scream it, but with all the legal shit still pending, I was just grateful we'd gotten this far.

"But we still need a keyboardist," he added.

"If I may," Harry said, holding up a finger. "You said you weren't comfortable using a studio musician, which is understandable all considering, but I may know of someone. He's a damn good piano player, and you can trust him. He could use the work, too."

"Who?" Bella asked, tilting her head at him.

"Demetri Stewart."

"Dad's old friend," Bella whispered, and then she turned to me. "He's good. Amazing. Can play anything from children's songs, to Beethoven, to Led Zepplin."

Grinning, I kissed her. "Okay, then. Call him. Set something up soon, because we leave for Chicago on Tuesday." My brow furrowed at that, but Bella squeezed me closer.

"Set it up for tomorrow when the bar is closed," she told him, smiling when he nodded and slipping her hand into mine before looking up at me as everyone at the table started to get up. "Now, just so you know, Mr. Cullen, I'm off the whole time you're here."

"Really?" I sang, bending to her ear. "Feeling…selfish, angel?"

She nodded, leaning into me and wrapping her arms around me. "I don't think I can stop."

Chuckling, I kissed her cheek. "Guess I'll have to get used to it."

Smirking up at me, with her arms still wrapped around my waist, she said, "We have a date, you know."

My eyes narrowed on her, trying my damnedest to remember just what the hell she was talking about, but it hit me as she pulled back to place a hand on my chest. Her finger traced along my ink.

"Fuck, I completely forgot!" I whispered against her lips. "You still game?"

Her nod and smile were adorable. It seemed that the meeting's conclusion had taken the weight off her, though I knew she thought most of it was her fault. Nothing could be farther from the truth. I was just about to kiss her stupid, call my friend, and drag her out of that bar like a caveman, but my dad walked to us.

His smile was amused, but his eyes were a little wary. "Son, I… Well, and Bella, too. You… I was… I need…" He was struggling. "With all this, not to mention I've got therapy with your mother come Monday…I think maybe…"

"A meeting?" I offered to him, to which he nodded in answer. "You need me to go with you?"

"I don't want to…" He smiled when he glanced to Bella, who leaned in to kiss his cheek.

"We can both go, Carlisle. It's no problem."

He glanced around at everyone milling about but then looked back to us. "I would really like that."

"Then we'll be there. Same one?" I asked, and he nodded. Before he could walk away, I pulled him to me by his shoulder. "If I learned anything at Serenity, Dad, it's that it's okay to ask for help. Got me?"

He nodded again.

"There's not one of us who would turn you down." I raised an eyebrow at him, and he smiled, his cheeks reddening, which made Bella laugh softly.

"Hush, angel," I chided teasingly.

Bella only laughed again but looked to my dad and then to me. "We'll go with him tonight, then you and I will go…do our thing tomorrow. We'll be back to meet Demetri when we're done. Is that… Will that work?"

Smiling, I pulled her to me and kissed her lips. "Bella, we could be scrubbing the floors, and I'm okay. I'm just happy to be home for a few days."

Her eyes were filled with a spunky happiness, but we kissed again. "And no more Aro."

Grinning, I nodded. "And no more Aro."

**~oOo~**

I eyed Demetri as he packed up his keyboards, and Jasper sauntered up next to me. The musician was older, with long, dark hair sprinkled with gray strands. He had several days growth on his face, which also had gray in it. He was tall, lean, wearing ragged jeans, and he reminded me of Bella's dad quite a bit – that old-school, mellow musician who had seen it all, done it all, and came back out the other side wiser.

"What'choo think?" Jasper whispered.

"Fuck, he's good," I murmured back in awe, turning to look at my best friend. "Looks like he's hit some…rough patches."

"Divorce," Jasper added. "She took everything and the kids and moved across the country. Harry says he's clean, just stumbled into some hard times."

Nodding a little, I let my eyes wander around Charlie's Pub. My Bella, Mike, and Harry were at the end of the bar – her on one side as Harry and Mike sat on stools. They were deep in conversation, an intense one from the looks of it. I smirked, though, as she favored her wrist where new ink now resided on the inside of it just below the heel of her hand.

A lower-case E. For me. Not Masen, but Edward. It was small, dark, and shadowed to give it the impression of a three-dimensional loop that just so happened to form the shape of a heart, too. My angel had marked herself for me, a permanent symbol of her love for me.

I wanted to kiss it, claim it, dote on it. I wanted to show the whole damn world.

Though, she wasn't the only one sporting a new tattoo. We'd gone just after breakfast. My tattoo artist was away, but hers was in, and we went to see a girl I would've _never_ guessed inked people for a living. At first glance, Angela looked like a bookworm, with glasses and a shy voice and demeanor, but when you truly looked at her, piercings and ink and a touch of blue and pink in her hair caught your eye. And fuck, she was good. Like all tattoo shops, she had books and samples, but really, she liked to design them specifically for her clients. And the new one on my shoulder blade couldn't be more perfect. It was a treble clef with angel's wings, also a symbol, something that represented exactly how Bella made me feel, like she watched over me at all times.

"Edward?" Jasper called to me with a chuckle. "Demetri, dude…focus. We keepin' him, or what?"

Tearing my gaze from Bella, I nodded. "Guess we should. He needs the job, and we need the keyboard player. We need to tell Rosie to make it worth his while. He'll most likely work this next leg of the tour, if not into the West Coast leg, too. Just so Alec can get Carrie and the baby settled in."

Jasper nodded, and we walked to the table my brother and sister-in-law were occupying, giving Rose the go-ahead. The next few minutes were taken up with explanations of how the tour would work, how long we needed him, and what his contract would entail. Demetri was very grateful, and he gave Bella and Harry hugs before he left.

It wasn't long after that everyone started to leave Charlie's. It was Sunday, and we were heading out to Chicago on Tuesday morning. Most everyone wanted some downtime with their families. Harry and Mike were the last to leave, and they both hugged Bella before she clicked the lock into place when they were gone. I took a seat in my usual spot. Watching her quietly clear away a few glasses, I smiled her way when she pointed toward the beer tap.

"Please," I sighed, sitting forward. "This feels…familiar."

She grinned, pouring us both a beer and clinking her mug with mine. "Never been so grateful for the media to chase you in here."

Grinning, I nodded, feeling my face heat. "I've missed this."

Her smile fell, but she broke her gaze from mine, only to soak in every inch of her bar. "Me, too. Even more, since I think it's time to close it."

"Angel, no… C'mere," I whispered, setting her on the stool next to mine, but I pulled her close. "You don't have to."

She smiled sadly, tucking her hair behind her ear, and her new ink caught my eye. "I think I need to, Edward. And I've already told Tori and Garrett."

I took her hand, turning it over so I could kiss the center of her palm, though I really wanted to love on that tatt. "Tell me why, Bella."

Her beautiful face took on a wistful expression as she gazed around the bar. She didn't seem sad, simply contemplative, but I wasn't sure. She licked her lips, swallowing a little and finally meeting my gaze.

"I think I need to let him go, Edward. It's… There's a selfish part of me that wants to be with you, and then there's the down-to-earth side that knows that it's time to… I kept this place in order to hold on to my dad." She huffed a sweet, light laugh, her eyes sparking with a touch of mischief. "And maybe to irritate my mother a little."

Chuckling, I kissed her lips. "Okay, so…"

"So…I want to be with you."

"Don't do this for me, angel. I'm begging you. Don't make such a drastic decision on my account. I know we hate being apart, but I know that this is also the last really long, ugly tour, baby… We were surviving it, with the occasional meltdown thrown in for good measure, but…" I grinned at her laugh. "But it… I don't want this on me."

She cupped my face, kissing me sweetly and keeping eye to eye. "It's not on you. It's on me. I'm not saying I'll travel full-time. I don't think I can do that, but… If I list the pros and cons of keeping this bar, the cons outweigh the pros." Raising my eyebrow in question, I waited until she giggled but answered my unasked question. "The cons…it's not booming. It's barely breaking even. It's treading water…like I was until I met you. I didn't realize how…how…complacent my life had become. I was hiding, Edward. I was hiding behind the loss of my dad, but… It took meeting you to see that…I wasn't really living.

"And it's not like it'll sit unused. Harry asked me if he could use it to record a few songs. They'll most likely do it while I'm away with you."

"So…you're really coming with me?" I asked in a whisper, not sure if I was worried or excited. It was a toss-up, really. I wanted her with me, for selfish reasons. But I wanted her to _want_ to be with me…not because she knew I'd be fucking ecstatic.

"Yes," she said through a giggle, kissing me again. "After what happened, I really just… I'd like to take you up on that kidnapping offer, Edward."

Laughing softly, I dropped my forehead to hers, but that wasn't close enough. Lifting her to my lap, I hugged her. "For as long as you want. There's more to this closing place, though, angel."

She smiled, setting her elbows on my shoulders so she could toy with my hair. "I think closing it will help your dad. With our leaving…"

My heart wanted to burst at how sweet that was, but I countered it with a bit of truth. "Angel, if he's gonna drink, he'll find a way. There are bars and liquor stores…"

"I know, but it won't be in his face when he comes home. I'm so…proud of him for asking for a meeting yesterday… He's doing so well, so I just want to help him. That's all."

"Me, too! That was…a huge step, really. I…" I trailed off, nodding a little. "I just hope therapy will help while we're gone."

"Yeah," she agreed softly. Her face reddened a little. "I also kinda thought – and it's Harry's fault, really, for bringing it up – that if…you know…Radiant Eclipse needed a place to record… I'm a pretty cheap date."

My mouth fell open. "Is that what you want, Bella? To turn this into a studio?"

"I'd love to keep it for music," she said firmly. "It's what my dad bought it for, what he'd want, I think. Though, knowing my dad, he'd tell me to go with my heart." She smiled at me. "The fact that Harry has a few new musicians he's trying to help…" She shrugged a shoulder. "It made me realize that when your tour is over, you guys will want to do things yourself. Harry's really good at it – production, I mean. He was always involved with my dad's stuff. He was also the one friend of my dad's who didn't want to take this place from me. Demetri, either. I just…" She sighed, looking at me with those dark, beautiful eyes. "Edward, it's time for a change. I've surrounded myself with a shrine to my dad, when I could be really _doing_ something."

"I…I'm… I want to help you…with this," I offered, nodding and running a hand over her head and down her back. "Seriously. It could…be a really awesome thing."

She smirked. "A partnership?" she asked, her voice a touch raspy but extremely sexy.

"Aren't we already?" I asked with a grin, but inside, I wanted the ultimate partnership with her. I wanted her. Always. Mine. Forever. I wanted the whole world to know that "Rock's Royal Couple" wasn't going any-damn-where. I wanted her to be mine, take my name, and to smash the rumors into oblivion that still ran amuck through the tabloids. "I think we can come up with some sort of…plan." I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from grinning like an idiot when she nodded.

"I want that. And I want to go with you Tuesday."

"Done. And done."

"I don't know how long…"

"Doesn't matter… I'll take however long you wanna go," I told her honestly. "I'm actually glad to get you out of here while all that shit goes down with Aro and James."

"So…we're good? We're…"

"We're doing what we said we'd do, angel," I whispered, kissing her before meeting her worried gaze. "We're finding _our_ normal. I, for one, am pretty fucking happy we've come this far."

She giggled and nodded. "Me, too." She slipped down from my lap and walked around to the other side of the bar, taking a big chug of her beer before grabbing a marker and a piece of paper. With a roll of tape in hand, Bella treaded softly to the front door of the bar. Opening it, she tacked the paper to the outside, stepping away with a happy, sweet grin when I walked to her.

"Okay?" I asked her, wrapping my arms around her from behind and kissing her cheek.

She nodded. "Yeah, I really am."

I stared at the sign but nodded. There was a touch of sadness seeing it, but my angel had held my hand through a million changes. It was my turn to do the same for her.

"Good." I closed the door and locked it, letting the sign say it all.

_Charlie's Pub Closed Until Further Notice._

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… **POSTING ANNOUNCEMENT** I will be skipping the mid-week post this week. I apologize, but I need to catch up with a few things, not to mention, I'm fighting a cold. So…I will be back next Sunday. I do apologize again, but a week won't be too long.**

**Some of you had guessed that the contract would be broken. Not technically, and to answer one question… You can't fire Aro. They are under contract with Volturi Records. The could fire Rose, since she's hired to be their manager, but they signed a 3 album deal with VR and have to stick it out until the end. They did, however, find a magnificent loophole. **

**And for you blood-thirsty creatures that wanted the details of Aro's unfortunate accident… LOL Just imagine him home with icepacks on his face. ;) And…the whys of it all will come to light soon. As Caius said… Aro kept James around for **_**personal **_**reasons. Promise you'll get filled in soon.**

**Okay, the pics and playlist are in their usual places. The links are on my profile. I will see you around Friday for the next pic tease, then Sunday for the update. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	24. This Is My Life

**A/N… Thank you guys for your patience and well-wishes. This cold is still kicking my ass, but I'm slowly getting better.**

**Some of you guessed that you could feel this winding up. Yeah, pretty much. This story will end up with 27 chapters, which will include the epilogue. I have considered an outtake, but we'll see. I'll let you guys get to it. **

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 24 – This Is My Life**

_This is my life  
It's not what it was before  
all these feelings I've shared  
and these are my dreams  
that I'd never lived before  
somebody shake me  
'cause I must be sleeping_

_Now that we're here,  
so far away  
all the struggle we thought was in vain  
all the mistakes,  
one life contained  
they all finally start to go away  
now that we're here, so far away  
and I feel like I can face the day  
I can forgive  
and I'm not ashamed,  
to be the person that I am today_

"_So Far Away" – Staind_

**EDWARD**

_Masen, do you have to testify in court along with Bella?_

_Masen! Masen! Is it true you won't be re-signing with Volturi Records?_

_Will Radiant Eclipse produce their own music next album? Will there _be_ a next album after what happened in Seattle?_

_Masen, is it true that you and Heidi Summers are engaged?_

A foul, loud laugh barked out of me, and despite the fact that I'd successfully navigated the damn media to get to the hotel lobby, that last question was utterly fucking ridiculous.

Turning to the skinny kid with the iPhone aimed my way, I simply said, "No. Not true."

_Masen! Masen! Wait! Where's Bella Swan? Are there plans to marry her?_

_Is it true Aro Volturi was forced into retirement?_

_James Allen is looking at three years jail time, what do you…_

The hotel lobby doors slid closed, cutting them all off, and Emmett's hand landed on my shoulder to guide me to the elevator.

"Wait, bear," I muttered, gesturing to the front desk. "Bella's flight will run late, and she's coming straight here. I need to leave her a key."

He grinned and nodded, following me to the counter. The girl at the desk gazed at me with wide eyes and a shaky smile, which made my brother chuckle.

"Um," I started glancing down at her name tag. "Kim, I need to leave a key for someone. They won't be in until late."

"N-No problem," she stated, taking my extra key and picking up an envelope. She pushed it across the counter with a pen so I could scrawl Bella's name on the outside. I set a large bill on top of it when I pushed it back toward Kim. "Sir?" she asked.

"I'm hoping you can be…professional, Kim," I stated softly, jerking my chin at the windows, where the media was now hounding the rest of my band. "They don't need to know every-damn-thing, do they?" I asked her with a grin, which made her blush. I tapped the envelope. "She's dealing with enough of that shit."

Kim had to have been a fan, because when she actually read the name, her eyes widened and she cooed a soft, "Aww, she's meeting you here?"

Emmett barked a laugh, shaking his head. "Unbelievable…" He nudged me. "Whole damn world is in love with the two of you. Rumors are on fire all over the world, but every time you two are together, you get…_aww_…" He pointed to Kim, who laughed and shrugged a shoulder, holding up the envelope.

"She's safe, Masen," she vowed to me, and I thanked her. "And welcome to Salt Lake City."

"Thanks," I said with a smile, nodding and giving her a wave before heading upstairs.

Emmett followed me into my room. "You've got a few before sound check, bro." He sat down in the chair by the window. "You okay?"

Grinning as I opened one of my bags, I nodded. "Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because Bella had to go back home to testify against James, because you've been too fucking quiet the last two days, because we didn't get a break between these last two legs, because Dad's still in your apartment and not at home with Mom…"

Snorting at that detailed list, I shook my head. "It's been a long fucking tour, Em." I set down my clean clothes and fell back onto my bed. "But this is the last leg," I mumbled, smirking at that. "Bella's fine. She called me after her testimony. She had to go home for other reasons, aside from that. Harry needed her."

I rolled my head to the side to see my brother nod, wearing a small smile.

Bella had joined us for most of the Midwest portion of the tour. She'd left with us on that Tuesday after James had been arrested and traveled about half of the second leg with us. It had been fantastic and stressful and hilarious. She'd asked to leave with me, and I never even questioned it, but I also knew she wouldn't do it full-time. She'd flown home to Seattle from Oklahoma City, which was about halfway through the second leg.

My girl had needed to testify against Aro and James, though we doubted anything would happen to Aro, just that he was no longer working for Volturi Records. Thankfully, Caius had held true to his word and acted as the company rep. He never gave us any trouble, just the occasional interview here, press conference there. It made me see how shit could've been had Aro not gotten greedy.

James, however, was in deep shit. Why his lawyer decided to take their chances in court, I had no fucking clue. With all the people testifying against him, he honestly didn't stand a chance. Not only was Bella called in, but so were my dad, Garrett, Tori, and Felix. The latter barely left my angel's side when she was in Seattle, and he was the only reason I felt comfortable away from her. Rose paid him…handsomely for it.

Bella had also sat down with the entire band, Rose, and Jenks and offered her place as a studio for us when our contract was up. She'd talked with Harry Clearwater, too, and everyone was willing to help her. Even Garrett and Tori were willing to lend a hand.

With Harry's contacts and Garrett's help cleaning out the bar, the space was already under renovation. It would no longer be Charlie's Pub but was now…Chainsaw Records. It would be an independent label, with the starting costs and business fees fronted by Bella, Jasper, and myself. The first clients were already using it. They were the musicians Harry had mentioned to Bella before we left. They were simply renting the space from Bella. Not many knew about it, but we all were aware that as soon as the contract with Volturi ended, Radiant Eclipse would put Chainsaw Records on the map.

And Bella was…excited. She'd grieved over the closing of Charlie's Pub, if only because of her emotional attachment to it, but the very second we put together a plan for the new studio, she'd lit up like a Christmas tree. She'd found new goals, a new purpose, and she was wickedly smart when it came to ideas. And with Bella came a slew of Charlie's old friends. Good ones.

Demetri was still touring with us, and he was doing a hell of a good job. He, too, was willing to put in time at the new studio once Alec rejoined us, which would be in a few weeks when we reached Las Vegas. Between Demetri and Harry, their experience outweighed their financial abilities, so they'd offered their expertise on production, recording, and even some marketing ideas. They'd both told me that Charlie would've done whatever Bella had asked of him, so they were doing it all in his honor.

"How long is Bella with us?" Emmett asked, pulling me out of my own head as he stood up from the chair.

"Until at least L.A.," I answered him, smiling at that. "She's going to the MTV Music Awards with me." I grinned like an idiot, which made my brother crack the fuck up, but I couldn't help it. I couldn't wait to show her off on the red carpet at the VMAs, not to mention shut up the rumors that still ran around about Heidi, and that thought reminded me to check some of the links Rose had sent me.

I picked up my phone as Emmett walked to the door. "I'll be ready in a few, Emmett," I mumbled, frowning at a few ridiculous headlines. I scrolled along, shaking my head at a few pictures, but smiled when my phone started to ring. "Hey, angel," I answered.

"Hey," she sighed, sounding frazzled. "I'm not gonna make the show tonight, so I'll meet you—"

"I figured. There's a key waiting at the front desk for you."

"Oh, good. I just… I wanted to tell you I loved you and that I'll see you late tonight, okay?"

Smiling, I nodded, despite the fact that she couldn't see me. "Love you, too. I can't wait. These last three weeks sucked without you."

"No kidding! Here, too," she agreed with a sweet laugh. "Oh, your dad says hello; so does your mom."

"How's therapy going?" I asked her, because the last time I'd spoken to either of my parents, the sessions with Dr. Banner had turned into shouting matches. Rose, Emmett, Bella, and I held no hopes for reconciliation for my parents.

"Better?" she said, though it came out like a question. "I don't know. There's more there than just his addictions, Edward. I think your mom was in serious denial with your dad, his drinking, and even with…well, everything he'd ever told her. I think maybe she thought he cheated? I don't know."

"Or maybe she thinks everything he said was a lie. I saw that shit a lot in rehab," I told her. "My dad's a lot of things, angel, but I can't see him having an affair."

"Me either," she sighed. "I think her friends don't help. They've left her out in the cold. She left the country club, you know."

My eyebrows shot up at that information. "Good. I hated that place…pretentious piles of shit."

Bella's giggle made me smile. "Edward…"

"Money is just…bullshit, Bella. Don't even…"

"Okay," she sighed, but I could hear the amusement in her tone. "I've gotta get my stuff together, and I'll see you in a few hours, Edward."

We ended the call with the usual declarations of love, and I stayed sprawled on my back in the middle of the hotel bed as I stared at the ceiling. There was such a calm feeling that came over me when I'd talk to Bella, and it was just as strong as the day I'd met her. We'd finally found our normal, even though we were probably just as busy as ever. We'd work and travel together for a few weeks, and she'd go home to Seattle to check in on the studio's progress. And now she was heading back my way to travel a bit more. It was good. It was strong. And it would only get easier when the Volturi contract dissolved with the last show we played, which just happened to be Seattle.

Rose's pounding knock on my door made me jump as she poked her head in after using her key. "Let's go! Let's go! We've got to get you guys fed and to the arena! What the hell?!"

Laughing, I pushed myself up and waved her away. "Slave driver! I'm up, dammit!"

**~oOo~**

"Thank you, Salt Lake City! And good night!" I yelled, pushing away from the microphone in order to throw my shirt into the audience, only to leave the stage.

As usual, Emmett guided me through the halls to the dressing room, along with the rest of the guys. Tanya tossed a towel my way and then brought me a bottle of water, which I downed immediately.

"You sound raspy," she pointed out seriously and then handed me a mug. "Drink so you don't lose your voice."

It was tea with honey and lemon, and I smiled when she leaned in to kiss my cheek, only to whisper in my ear. "Did she really think you'd play that shit?"

When I looked at her curiously, Tanya jerked her chin toward the corner of the dressing room, where Senna was sitting quietly in the corner, but it was the guy kneeling by her feet like an obedient dog – leash included – that caused my eyebrows to rise up. He was an all-right-looking guy, with a few tattoos here and there. The expression on his face was serene and calm, almost blissful. Fucker liked that shit.

Snorting, I shook my head. "Who the fuck knows… Whatever gets your rocks off, I guess," I allowed, shrugging a shoulder. "Would you put Kate on a leash, _Mistress Tanya_?" I asked her teasingly.

"If I did, I'd better run or she'd strangle me with it." Tanya chuckled, nudging my hand. "Drink, sweetie."

I sipped some more tea, and she was right; it soothed my throat. I stayed quiet as we all tried to settle down a bit after the show. After finishing the cup of tea and grabbing a shower, I sat down on the ledge of one of the vanities to wait for everyone else. Checking my phone, I didn't see any messages from Bella, so I assumed she hadn't landed yet, much less made it to the hotel.

"You look…mellow," I heard from beside me, and I turned to see Senna standing there.

I smirked, glancing around her. "Where's your…"

"Pet?" she offered, and I chuckled and nodded. "Tyler's…busy." She held up her phone. "These rumors are ridiculous, Masen."

"They've actually calmed down since we got rid of Aro," I countered, shrugging a shoulder. "Whatever's still out there is most likely…"

"Your ex."

I nodded again, glancing at my quiet phone. "If I had to guess, which is all it would be is a fucking guess, she needs the press for her career. She and Aro were working together. Aro's shut up, and James isn't saying shit, so it's mainly her…or her people, really. Everyone here and everyone at home who counts knows the truth."

"She's fed off your name long enough, don't you think?" Senna asked. "Like a leech… She needs to sink or swim without you now." When I waved that away, simply because I had it so fucking good I could barely see straight, Senna poked my side. "Masen! _She fucked up with you_! And you still let her use your name for false bullshit!"

Grinning, I laughed. "Aw, Senna, relax… There's just as much true stuff floating around out there, too."

She grimaced, sighing, "True, but still… Bitch needs to be taught a lesson."

Laughing, I shook my head. "Eventually, reality will win out, Senna. Promise. I thank you for watching my back, though." I shot her a wink, slipping down from the vanity.

"What about Bella?" she asked before I could join my bandmates to finish up with the backstage-pass holders.

"What about her?"

"How's she feel about seeing rumors that you're still bangin' your ex?"

Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly. "She's… She ignores it. I'm telling you, the truth is better than anything those trash-rag writers can make up. They can't write fiction for shit. Besides, they'll all see who's on my arm come August."

Senna grinned, and it was evil and conspiratorial. "Hot damn…the VMAs… I forgot all about that shit. Do me a favor, then, handsome…" she purred, tapping my chin when I raised an eyebrow at her. "You fucking _work_ it on the red carpet. Show them all."

Smirking her way, I nodded once. "Yes, ma'am. Planning on it."

"Good," she huffed dramatically, giving me a wink. "Because let me tell you something, Masen… Aro may have pushed the bad-boy image, pushed the sexy rock-star thing, but _nothing_ is as sexy as how you look at Bella. Nothing. You show that? And the whole world will see, including that ex of yours. There's something undeniably attractive about a man in love, no matter how 'bad' he's supposed to be. In fact, the harder the image, the more appealing love looks on him. Why do you think your fans like it so much? Forget the paps and the gossip rags."

Chuckling, I nodded. "Fair enough."

Working my way through the meet-and-greet with the backstage-pass holders almost on autopilot, I let my mind work through all that Senna had said. Honestly, whatever Heidi said or did was not a big deal to me, simply because I lived the truth. I knew where I stood with the people I trusted – specifically Bella. But something in the way Senna had asked about Bella hearing and seeing all the shit all the damn time made me worry that there was something I needed to ask my girl.

I also wanted to know exactly what she'd heard inside the courtroom. The night James and Aro had dared set foot inside Charlie's Pub with fucked-up intentions still plagued me. I had promised Rose from the very moment it happened that I'd leave it up to her, and despite the fact that James would most likely do time for it all, Aro would probably buy his way out of trouble, and that didn't sit well with me. I wanted them both to pay for what they'd tried to do to Bella. But technically, Radiant Eclipse was still under contract with Volturi Records. To touch or even threaten Aro at this point would be career suicide. I could wait. I _would_ wait. One day, he wouldn't be able to hide behind ink on paper, nor could his brother save him.

The ride back to the hotel was quick and easy. The media was still lurking around outside, but I barely heard a word they asked me. It was all added to the noise in my head, the ringing in my ears left over from the show, and the slight worry that I hadn't heard from Bella yet. I pulled my phone out in the elevator but sighed when my service was shitty.

The doors opened on my floor, and Emmett wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "We're heading out early in the morning. We've got to head toward Phoenix, and then it's Vegas, baby!"

Grinning, I nodded, stopping in front of my door. "And then California. Got it, bear," I told him, slipping the keycard into the door. "We'll be up…" He waved as I pushed open the door, and the door slammed closed behind me at just what my eyes fell to in my room. "Ho…_shit_…" I muttered, my eyes taking in black lace and smooth skin and ink. "I think I'm in the wrong room," I stated, walking slowly toward the stunning vision in front of me.

Bella's smile slowly curled up on her beautiful face as she stood in the middle of my hotel room. "You think? Why's that?"

"'Cause all of this can't be for me," I said softly, reaching out to trail a finger along the ink that splashed up her side and smirking when her muscles tensed at my touch. "No, can't be… Must be dreaming again."

"You have dreams like this?" Bella asked, giggling when I met her gaze with a raised eyebrow.

"Since the day I met you," I whispered, wrapping my arm around her waist and pressing my forehead to hers. "Fuck, I've missed you. I wasn't expecting you until later."

"I caught a stand-by spot. And I wanted to be here when you got done, unless you had plans…"

Grinning, I shook my head without pulling back from her. "If I had any, I honestly wouldn't be able tell you what they were… Jesus, I'm not sure I know my own name."

"Edward," she said through a sweet, soft laugh. "You've seen me in less."

"I plan on seeing you _again_ in less very, _very_ soon." My hands started to skim over skin and satin and lace, finally landing on her sweet ass as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"How was the show?" she asked with a grin, brushing her lips across mine.

"Fine…perfect…beautiful…"

She laughed at me, squeaking a little when I gave that ass a squeeze and then lifted her up. Strong legs wrapped around my waist as I kicked out of my Docs and stepped to the bed. I knew we needed to talk about all the shit going on back home. I knew that she'd just flown a few hours to get to me. But goddamn, if she didn't look delicious…or maybe the adrenaline from the show was still pushing me. Either way, I needed her.

Crawling up the bed, I set her down on top of the covers, kissing her into oblivion. She tasted like everything I missed, like sweetness and perfection, like sex and want, and like love and need.

"You are way too overdressed, Mr. Cullen," she grumbled, her hands slipping beneath my shirt in order to rake her fingers down my back. "I want…"

A moan escaped me, turning into almost a growl to my voice as I rained kisses down her throat to that glorious cleavage that her bra was creating. "What'd you want, angel?"

"You…I've missed you, too."

I braced a hand by her head, reaching back with my free one to tug off my shirt, grinning when impatient fingers yanked at my jeans. There was something so fucking good about every single reunion. No matter the length of time separated, we always seemed to blend right back together like no time had passed. There were always smiles and touches to places that were so damned familiar. There were soft laughs and groans for more skin, more touches…just _more_.

Bella worked on my jeans, and I hissed a string of curses at the clasp on her bra, which only made her laugh again. Finally, the bastard cooperated, and I pulled the now hated lacy-silky thing off her. Articles of clothing landed unceremoniously off the side of the bed, and all that was left were her underwear. I pushed and shoved at them, all while reuniting with those fuck-fabulous piercings.

"Oh, hello, ladies… I've missed you so…and look how much you missed me," I teased, raking my teeth over them when they perked up nice and tight, putting those steel wonders out all for my benefit, but it was Bella's shaking, silent laugh that made me chuckle. Sliding down her torso, I kissed my way across her stomach that still shook with her laugh, taking a second to tease her bellybutton piercing, too. I couldn't leave that sexy bitch out.

"No, never," Bella answered my apparently vocal declaration.

Grinning, I inhaled deeply the scent of her skin. It smelled like home and just pure Bella as I gripped the sides of the last stitch of clothing between us. I pulled them slowly down her legs, meeting warm, dark eyes as she stared up at me from the bed. Ghosting my hands along the inside of her thighs, I spread her open and leaned in to drag my tongue across the sensitive spot just outside her sweet pussy at the crease of her thigh. Her hips rose up just a bit, and a desperate sound escaped her when I did the same to the other side.

But when my mouth met her hot, needy pussy, I felt fingers slip into my hair and heels dig into my shoulders to hold me right where she wanted me. I lost myself in the taste of her, the smell of her, and the sounds she was making. There wasn't anything like it. And anything outside that perfect and glorious spot between her legs simply faded away into nothing. Even better was the rhythmic movement of her hips as she practically rode my face.

My hum of approval and my fingers slipping deep inside caused her to shatter, and I drank up everything she'd give me while riding out every second of her climax, nipping lightly at the inside of her thigh before traveling back up to her glorious face.

My forehead thumped to hers softly when she wrapped one hand around my already leaking cock and the other gripped my ass to pull me in. She lined me up, and I sank deep inside her, both of us groaning at the feel of it.

"Fuck, you feel like heaven," I panted, squeezing my eyes closed in order to keep from simply fucking her stupid.

"Edward, please…"

Starting a deep, slow rhythm, I dropped to an elbow by her head, linking our fingers together. I brought her hand to my lips, giving her newest ink my attention. I loved on it just like I swore I would when she first got it. I couldn't help it. It was her sweet, easy love for me – _Edward_, not Masen – that made me adore it. I'd seen several Radiant Eclipse tattoos on fans all over the damn world. I'd seen Masen tattoos and my lyrics inked permanently on someone's skin forever, but nothing beat Bella's sweet little heart-shaped lower-case E. Nothing.

I drove into her over and over, until we were both holding back from falling into the abyss.

"Let go, angel," I begged her, brushing my lips across hers as my fingers sought out the swollen, sensitive spot I knew would send her over the edge. "Don't hold back. You don't have to make it last, I'll make you come as many times as you want now that you're here…"

Legs around my waist, hands gripping my hair, and that hot, wet pussy all pulled me in when she let go. She gripped me so tightly that my rhythm faltered, and my own control blew away like a puff of smoke. I buried myself inside her, spilling everything I had…which included every curse word known to man.

My head fell to the crook of her neck and shoulder as our breathing calmed. Bella's fingers raked slowly and soothingly through my hair and down my spine. If she wasn't careful, my sweet angel would put me to sleep.

She chuckled. "Sleep, Edward. If you want."

I pressed a kiss to her throat before rolling off her, and we faced each other on our sides. "You're a sight for sore eyes, angel. I swear."

She smiled. "You're not so bad yourself."

I pulled her closer, brushing her hair from her face. "You hungry? Want to get something?"

"Only if it's room service, baby, because I'm not leaving this bed."

Grinning, I nodded. "Smart girl."

My whole being melted at having her back with me, and I dropped a soft kiss to her lips before reaching for the menu. Her laugh was happy and light, but she got up and padded into the bathroom.

I called down for a bunch of stuff, just to give us a choice, and I got up to grab some shorts out of my bag, smiling at Bella's stuff next to it – her bags, jacket, and carry-on backpack. I put my shorts on, turning to see my girl emerge from the bathroom in a robe.

"What's that smile?" she asked.

"Just…you. Back…here." Rolling my eyes at my own idiocy, I shrugged as I sat down on the edge of the bed. "Whatever. I'm just happy to see you."

When the food arrived, Bella playfully shoved me down. "I got this. You answer the door like that, and there will be five minutes of either babbling rock-fan gibberish if it's a guy or drooling over the sight of you if it's a girl."

Laughing, I fell back flat onto the bed, listening to her sign for the food. It was a girl, and from the sound of her voice, she was none too happy that it was Bella who'd answered.

"She sounded…put-out, angel," I teased not even bothering to sit up yet.

"Yeah, well…like you've said before… She'll live."

Grinning, I sat up, and we set ourselves up on the bed with a picnic, of sorts. I caught her up on the tour, how the last few shows had gone, what was coming up, and reminded her about the awards show in L.A.

She smiled, but her brow furrowed. "Alice said she'd take care of it…dressing us."

"Yeah, she usually does," I said, popping a French fry in my mouth. "Brace yourself for a day of prep. Consider yourself warned. But we all ride together and walk the carpet together…" My voice trailed off, and I remembered my conversation with Senna. "Bella… Angel, you're… You still want that, right? You still want to go…"

"Of course," she said carefully, narrowing her eyes on my face, which heated up immediately. "Why wouldn't I?"

I dragged another fry through ketchup and told her about my talk with Senna. "I dunno, angel, I just… We've learned to ignore most of the gossip stuff. I just… Does it bother you?"

"I don't read it, Edward," she said with a truthful yet beautiful laugh. "Honest, I don't." She shrugged a shoulder. "Rose keeps me posted about certain things, should I get asked a question by the media, but your ex is… Heidi's issues are low on my priority list, baby."

Chuckling, I nodded. "Mine, too. Believe me." I finally put the now-drenched-in-ketchup fry in my mouth and chewed slowly. "What happened at home?" I finally asked.

Her nose wrinkled adorably. "Which part?" she asked softly, her eyes warm and sweetly concerned. "Your parents? The trial? Or the studio?"

Snorting, I shrugged a shoulder but shifted the tray of food to the side so I could pull her to me. "I don't care. Whatever you wanna tell me. You never really went into detail with much of it on the phone…"

She turned so that she was cradled in my arms. Reaching up, she pushed my hair from my forehead, only to trail her fingers down my jaw.

"I prefer…this." She gestured between us. "The tablets are great, but nothing beats this. And I knew I'd be right back here as soon as I could."

"I love you." I smiled at the simplicity of that statement, but it was no less true. That she knew me…us…so well made me unable not to say it out loud.

"I love you, too, Edward." She didn't move from my lap, so I leaned back against the pillows and headboard as she settled in and took a deep breath. "The studio looks amazing. They've turned the stage into the recording area, the old bar section into the sound room, and they've put all this stuff up to keep down echoes. But they've left all my dad's stuff hanging on the walls of the area Harry said a receptionist could sit. It's coming along really well."

Her smile was gorgeous. I could see how proud she was of it all, and I kissed her softly. "Can't wait to fucking get in there and use it, angel," I told her honestly. "What else?"

Her nose scrunched up a little. "Your parents are…struggling. But they're stubborn, so they haven't given up. When your mother told me there are more things to contend with concerning their marriage, I didn't press. It's honestly none of my business. But your dad…he's right upstairs, Edward. We had coffee a bunch of times while I was home. He even rode with me to the courthouse."

Smiling, I kissed her forehead. "That's good, baby. I think it's kinda awesome you two are buddies." I grinned at the word, but it was true. My dad had stepped in at the most fuck-awesome moment to save my girl, and I knew _deep down_ that my girl missed having a dad around. They leaned on each other. And that was perfectly fine with me. Maybe he needed her, too. Hell, I was damn sure she wasn't going anywhere.

"He's doing so well, Edward," she told me with a prideful smile. "He told me he wavered a few times, but he hasn't taken a sip. And my bar is completely empty of alcohol. Garrett got rid of it. The unopened stuff went back to the distributor, and the open stuff… Well, I think there was a party when Maggie moved in with Garrett."

I laughed. "Good for them."

Her smile was sweet. "Anyway, your dad told me that…prior to you being born, but after Emmett…there was a nurse."

"No, Bella… Tell me he didn't…"

"He didn't. At least, he swears on his soul, a stack of Bibles, and his grandmother's grave that he didn't. But the nurse kinda made it seem that way. Apparently, Esme let it go, but…_didn't_. And apparently someone at the country club knew."

"And now my mother's doubting everything." I grimaced, my head falling back to the headboard with a dull thump. "If he could lie about me…"

"Then he could be lying about the nurse. Yeah…that's pretty much the gist of it." I felt warm hands on my face, and she pulled me back to her gaze. "They'll figure it out, Edward. He still loves her. So much. And he's swimming up the stream of lies he's spewed over the years, but eventually she'll see he's busting his ass. He's back to work, he's clean, and he's honest. But don't let her stubbornness fool you. She loves him, too. She just…dealing with guilt, too. She should've seen his downfall coming, but she probably ignored it to save face, to avoid confrontation. Or maybe she blamed herself, like my mom did with Charlie, like they couldn't make their men happy. I don't know, but your parents are not giving up. They still meet at Dr. Banner's once a week."

"What do we do when this tour is over, angel? Do I…"

She giggled, bringing my head down in order to kiss me. "As your landlord, you should know your lease is just about up. Or it will be around the time this tour is over."

My chest constricted at that thought. "Should I write the check now?" I teased her, but my heart wanted it all with her. Everything. No more leases or rent. Let some other schmuck pay rent. I wanted to take care of her…

"If you want," she hedged, but her smile was sweet as she broke my train of thought.

"What do _you_ want, angel?" I asked her.

She leaned up and kissed me. "I'm kind of a spoiled girl now, Edward. I really liked having you stay with me when you came home. I like…this."

My grin was probably ridiculously stupid, and I knew I was blushing, simply because she kissed my lips roughly. "Me, too," I admitted. "Okay, we'll…talk about it, Bella. We'll…figure it out. We always do."

"Yeah, we kinda do, don't we?"

I kissed her, slowly, thoroughly, ending in a sweep of my lips over hers. "Now…court, baby. Please…tell me."

Bella's face sobered up, but she nodded. Sitting up a little, she tucked her hair behind her ear, focusing on my arms, not my face. All these things meant she was nervous, wary to tell me.

"Angel?"

She met my worried gaze, her brow furrowed. "I need you…to stay calm with what I'm going to tell you, okay? Promise me."

"I…I can promise to _try_, Bella," I said honestly, narrowing my eyes at her. "What is it?"

"Jenks, who has pretty much held my hand through all of this – he's fantastic, by the way," she started quickly. "He was right when he said that James would squeal on Aro…and scream loud."

"Okay…" I dragged out the word, simply because Jenks being right didn't shock me on any level. And James was a fucking pussy. He always had been.

"Edward, I stayed for James's testimony. They're trying really hard to pin something on Aro. Though, I don't know if it'll work. But…I heard the plan for the night they stepped into my bar." She grimaced, swallowing nervously and shaking her head. "You're gonna be so mad…" she whispered.

"Shh, angel," I soothed her, cupping her face. "You're safe…right here. What could've happened…didn't. And I'm grateful. I'm sure I'll be pissed, but honestly, Bella, I'm just happy you're okay, that they failed."

She studied my face but then nodded a little. "Apparently, James is Aro's son…like prior to marriage. So…getting him the job as your drummer was more than just a…studio-musician thing." My eyebrows shot up at that, but I stayed quiet when she smirked at me. "Yeah, I was shocked, too, but… When Radiant Eclipse went…big, part of that was due to the real-life relationship that stemmed from the video you made with Heidi. Aro fed that to the media, pushed it and amped it up. Even though she didn't travel to see you, you guys still made appearances together, so it fed everything around you two – her career, the band's sales, and like they always say…there's no such thing as bad press." When I snorted derisively, she smiled. "Well, to Aro there isn't. And he'd promised her that he'd make her a star…way beyond that video."

"Keep going," I whispered against her lips.

"Anyway," she continued with a sigh, "your dad's accident threw a big wrench into the works. Like huge. Had he taken responsibility for his DUI, then nothing would've changed, but when you were arrested, Heidi's manager lost his shit and told her to get rid of you, that you would drag her into trash-celebrity status. That pissed Aro off something fierce, not in defense of you, but it took away his favorite marketing tool. What pissed Aro off even more was that Heidi was sleeping with James, and she really liked him."

"And Peter Grisham?" I asked, my mind swirling all this shit together.

"Peter was a cover-up…for James. She wasn't hiding the affair from you; she was hiding the affair from Aro."

Groaning, I shook my head as I raked a hand through my hair. "Okay…so let me guess… Aro found out about everything once I was in rehab."

"Oh, yeah. Everything." She nodded, scrunching her nose up again. "James said that Aro used the DUI as best he could – you know, partying rock star finally caught – but the problem was…James can't be faithful if his life depended on it. So…Heidi found out about some threesome thing at a Seattle show…"

I gasped, my mouth hanging open. "I saw that! Well…I didn't _see it_, but I mean, I saw him with two girls at the Seattle show just after rehab… Fuck, baby, that was the night I met you."

She grinned but went on. "Okay, well, she picked the wrong band member. She let the good one go and picked the one who couldn't keep his mouth shut, which, in turn, lost him his job."

Laughing at Bella's snark, I kissed her.

"Now, she was shit out of luck." Bella shrugged a shoulder. "She'd started to hear rumors that you'd moved on, saw that James was a cheating bastard and out of a job, and Aro was pissed at everyone. Apparently there was a baby scare…"

"Fuck, who!?"

"Heidi, but she's not…" Bella paused for a second. "Had she been, Edward, James said they were going to claim you were the father."

I laughed, like guffawing, stomach-holding, tears-in-my-eyes, guttural laughter. I laughed so hard, Bella joined me.

"Right, I know. You weren't even in the country, then you were in rehab, but it would've been _huge_ news. It would've repaired the relationship status back to its original form, adding a baby in for extra oomph. Aro would've pushed it all over the globe."

That sobered me up. "Yeah, I guess. Was that why she was at the video shoot? To 'win me back'…"

"Or at least get you into bed one more time in order to claim parentage."

Grunting at that, I frowned, glaring off into the hotel room for a second as I shook my head at this bullshit. Funnily enough, I knew this couldn't have been the worst part. Cupping Bella's face, I kissed her. Hard.

"Never. It would've never worked, angel."

"I know that," she scoffed but kissed me softly. "She wasn't pregnant, though. And you and I went public. Pike Place."

"Best date ever."

She giggled. "Shut up and listen. We went public, and we were immediately accepted." She laughed a little more. "We didn't even know we were doing it, but every step they tried to make against us, we unknowingly did something to counter it. James out of the band gave you Mike. You and me together thwarted Aro's plan to make you a rock daddy."

We laughed at that together, but my girl's smile fell quickly. "They tried like hell, Edward. They manipulated the media and paps, paid off some photographers, but nothing worked. Heidi, who took Mr. Milton's threat the day of the video shoot seriously, gave up. With you obviously moved on, James being controlled by Aro, and Aro's endless manipulations, she moved out of Seattle."

I grimaced at that, feeling a touch sorry for her. It wasn't easy being used, but she'd allowed some of it. "She should've just told me."

"Some people aren't as brave as you," Bella countered, shrugging a shoulder. "She isn't innocent. She was the one behind the mysterious text sent to my phone."

"Seriously?" I snapped, shaking my head.

"Yeah, James bought the phone, got my number from your cell, and well, they tried… and again, we didn't allow it to get to us."

I bit the inside of my lip for a second. "They counted on you believing it," I surmised, and Bella nodded. "They clearly underestimated your strength."

"And how well I knew you," she added with a giggle, but it didn't last, and I braced myself for the next part. "Edward, they…" She took a deep breath and let it out. "James testified that Aro said to 'let Masen have his temporary tour whore.' He said that they were going to wait until you were just about to come home for the first break. They knew you'd come to me. They knew I was promoting Harry that night. What they didn't know was that your dad would be there."

My nostrils flared at the name he called her. My hands balled up into fists at how this seemed to be planned out.

"Go on, angel," I grunted out through gritted teeth.

"The plan was…to drug me, parade me in James's arms past the paps outside, and get me upstairs to my apartment. James was supposed seduce me, but since I wasn't exactly cooperative in that respect, Aro had given him the rohypnol. After they got me upstairs, they would confront you with my cheating…or really, Aro would, to show that he was out for your best interests, that he'd always watch over you… It would've been his way of drawing you back into Volturi."

"Please let me up, Bella," I begged her, and she slipped off my lap so I could get up. My hands gripped my hair almost painfully as I paced and thought over what they'd planned. I rounded on her. "Did they really fucking think that would work?! I mean, come on!"

"Maybe." Her voice was small and nervous. "Edward…he said he was supposed to take pictures…of me…of us together. But he was also timing it so that you'd…you'd come home to it. He swore in court he wasn't going to touch me, but James is slimy. He would've done something. You didn't see the way he looked at me that night." She pointed to her chest, and she looked up at me worriedly. "You would've thought it…without knowing about the drugs, you would've believed them, especially had you walked in on it."

I was shaking my head. "No…no, I wouldn't have! You've done nothing but guard me like a lioness since I fell into your bar. You would _never _fuck me over like that. Never! Uh-uh. No. I don't give a fuck what proof they would've had to show me. I know you. I know you'd come to me if it was over. Not cheat. I don't care what you…"

Bella scrambled off the bed and flew into my arms. I lifted her up and sat back down on the edge of the bed. "I would never hurt you like that, Edward. I swear!"

"I know, baby," I sighed as we wrapped around each other. "Do I even want to know the rest?"

She snorted a little and pulled back to cup my face. "James will do a year in jail and pay a hefty fine. Aro is currently under investigation, but…Jenks said not to hold our breath."

"Okay," I said with a single nod, my brow furrowing a little as I thought it all over, and when I met warm, brown, loving eyes, I smirked a little. "We should just…show 'em all." Grinning at Bella's perplexed expression, which was utterly adorable, I nodded again. "Yeah, Heidi's still feeding off those rumors. Aro thought he could control me, they thought that they could take away everything, but…holy hell, look at this gorgeous thing I still have," I said in pure, honest awe and respect. I loved that girl.

"Show 'em all, what?" she asked, grinning as she started to press kisses to my lips, my jaw, my throat. "You want…normal couple shit? You want…public displays of affection? What, Edward? What do you want?"

"I want it all."

She pulled back at my forceful yet simple statement. "Meaning?" she whispered, but I could see she wanted it, too.

"Everything. You, me, public, private…just everything. I love you, and I want the world to know. I want to bind myself to you where no one can fucking touch us. Marry me, angel."

She pulled me down to kiss my lips. "You mean that, because this might be the deepest blush yet."

"Fuck, yeah…I mean it."

Her giggle was laced with a touch of sniffles, but she kissed me again. "Yes."

"You sure, angel? You're marrying both Edward and Masen…" I teased her just to see her face light up. "Edward may want to go the boring wedding route with a diamond ring, but Masen may push for tattoo bands and Vegas."

"I love you both with an insanity…" She laughed but kissed me again. "We could maybe make them both happy."

"Maybe. I'm sure we'll figure it out," I said with pure confidence, simply because it was true.

"We always do," she added, smiling at me. "So what's next?"

Grinning, I reached for the tie on her robe, tugging it slowly open. "Right now, I'm about to figure out which spots I missed earlier and reintroduce myself every inch of you… You know…just in case."

"You can never be too thorough," she agreed in a dramatic voice.

"Exactly," I sang, smiling down at those beautiful piercings. "Then…it's back on the magic bus with you tomorrow morning, baby."

Bella's head fell back with her laugh, but she bit her bottom lip as I pushed open her robe completely.

"Ladies," I greeted, leaning Bella back in order to kiss each nipple ring. "In case you haven't heard…there's gonna be some title changes around here…"

"Shut up, Edward!" Bella burst out into laughter, pulling my face to hers. "Shut up and kiss me."

Chuckling at her pure happiness, I did as she asked.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… For those that guessed that James was related to Aro…well done. For those that guessed that they were lovers…I threw up a little over that one. JS. O.o That combo…just…no. **

**We pick back up with Bella on the road with the guys next chapter, which ran long, but probably the most fun I've had writing this story, in spite of this disgusting cold I have. It took forever, which is also why I took a little extra time between postings. **

**However, I'll be updating Wednesday or Thursday this week. After that, we'll see where I stand. Otherwise, all the pics and playlists are in their usual places. Until next time… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	25. Crazy 'Bout a Sharp Dressed Man

**A/N… A lot of you have theories on the wedding, the VMAs, and Heidi. ;) I'll let you guys get to it…so see me at the bottom. We're back with Bella on this one.**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 25 – Every Girl Crazy 'Bout a Sharp Dressed Man**

_Clean shirt, new shoes  
And I don't know where I am goin' to.  
Silk suit, black tie,  
I don't need a reason why._

_They come runnin' just as fast as they can_  
_'Cause every girl crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man._

_Gold watch, diamond ring,_  
_I ain't missin' not a single thing._  
_And cuff links, stick pin,_  
_When I step out I'm gonna do you in._

_They come runnin' just as fast as they can_  
_'Cause every girl crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man._

"_Sharp Dressed Man" – ZZ Top_

**BELLA**

"Miss Bella, it's good to see you back with us," Tony greeted with a big smile as he took my bags from me.

"Thank you, Tony," I told him, standing up on my toes to kiss his cheek.

He tipped his baseball cap dramatically, which caused groans from all the guys – my brother and boyfriend included. Not boyfriend…_fiancé_. The word caused a brief pause in every thought process I had, making me glance back as Edward set his own stuff down, except for his guitar case. He was dressed for comfort and travel – old, worn-out jeans with rips in the knees, a black T-shirt, and his usual Docs. Though, the latter would most likely be kicked off as soon as we got moving. His hair was still in a damp disarray as he rolled his eyes at Tony's big grin.

"Work it harder next time, Tone," Edward drawled sarcastically with a shake of his head when Tony popped his collar at him, all in good teasing.

"Dude… Cheesy much?" Mike laughed, squeaking like a girl when I gave him a wet willy as we trudged up the bus steps. "Augh! B! You know I hate that shit! Mase said something, too!"

"Yes, but you're closer," I told him, smiling when he scowled at me. "It's not cheesy; it's called manners. Didn't Mom teach you any-damn-thing?"

"She taught me which fork is the salad one," he said with a laugh at my eye roll. "You're just cranky 'cause you were probably up _all night_." He waggled his eyebrows, only to scream again and slam his hands over his ears when I put my finger back in my mouth. "It's a long fucking way to Arizona, B!" he grumbled, dropping a backpack into the seat he usually took.

It was early as hell the morning after I'd arrived in Salt Lake City. However, my brother was right – Edward and I had been up most of the night. I'm not sure it could've been helped; we'd simply spent most of the night celebrating being back together…and our engagement.

I shook my head to clear it of all the stuff running through my mind. We were about to get on the road to make our way down to Phoenix, and then it was Vegas. Edward wanted to marry me. And I'd said yes. As I took my usual spot on the tour bus, my eyes drifted to the door. Edward stepped up inside, careful not to bump his head or smack anyone or anything with his guitar case as he made his way down the small walkway. He seemed too big for the space. Or maybe the bus was just too damn crowded, but his presence on it felt…enormous. Or hell, maybe things just felt different.

"Angel?"

A paper cup appeared in my vision, and I could smell coffee, cream, and sugar. Taking it like it was the Holy fucking Grail, I looked up at him like he was the rock god he pretended to be, which made him grin that sexy half smile my way.

"I honestly didn't want a wet willy, so I'm hoping to brownnose my way out of it."

Giggling, I peeled the lid up gently, sipping it. "It worked."

"Well, that was easy," he said, leaning his guitar on the cushion and sitting next to me. Wrapping an arm around my shoulders when I leaned against him, he pressed a kiss to the side of my head. "Ready for this?" he asked, his brow furrowing when my head snapped around to him. "What?"

"Ready for what?"

"This…the whole on-the-road thing, angel." He huffed a laugh, bringing me closer. "What'd you think I meant?" He cupped the side of my face, his eyes raking over every inch of it, it seemed. Finally, he smiled a little, his face blushing so beautifully. "Baby, there's no rush on anything we discussed last night." He brushed soft, temptingly sweet kisses to my lips before adding in a whisper, "Just the fact that you said yes… That's everything."

Smiling, I kissed him again. "I meant it… And stop blushing like that!" I hissed, kissing him again. "You're killing me this morning."

He laughed, raising his hands in surrender. "It's not something I can stop with you, obviously."

I chuckled as I took another sip coffee. "Tease."

I felt his hand cover mine, his fingers ghosting across my ring finger.

When I met his gaze, his eyes were dark green. "I meant it, too, angel," he whispered. "I want… We can… I just want my mark on you. Here. Permanently. I'll get you a ring, if that's what you want. I'll get you any-fucking-thing in the world, Bella."

"Fuck," I breathed, and despite the fact that our activities the night before could be felt all over every inch of my body, he was killing me. My forehead fell to his, and it took all the restraint I had not to kiss him stupid in front of everyone on that tour bus – just about all of us were present and accounted for at this point. Hell, Tony had already closed the doors. "I don't feel rushed, Edward," I whispered back, finally addressing his original concern and giggling when his face tinged pink again while that smile of his could've lit up all of Salt Lake City.

"What's with you two today?" Emmett asked, narrowing his eyes at me and then his brother, never mind that everyone was staring at us.

"Nothing," Edward and I sang in unison barely breaking our gaze, which caused us to laugh again.

"Ah, leave them be," Demetri drawled. "It's good to see." He shot me a wink. "Your dad has to be cracking the hell up, though. You with a musician."

"Yeah, I know. Oh!" I gasped, handing Edward my coffee so I could grab my backpack…and successfully take the focus off Edward and me, simply because we weren't sure what we were going to tell everyone else, especially Rose. Not yet, anyway. "Tony, hold on. You'll want to see this, too!"

"Yes, ma'am." He stood up from the driver's seat and walked toward us.

I turned on my tablet, smiling down at the file I opened. "Thought you might like to see who I met just before I left Seattle."

I held up the pictures of Alec, Carrie, and the reason for their tired smiles…Tia. She was eight pounds of chubby, sweet, brand-new baby girl. She had a headful of dark hair that matched her dad but a bow-shaped mouth that was like her mother's.

"Oh, stop," Edward said with a laugh.

"God, she's beautiful!" Tanya squealed softly.

I let Edward take the tablet so he could scroll through all the pics. Alec and Carrie had stopped by my place the day before I was due to leave Seattle. Tiny Tia was a grunting, grumbling little ball of sweetness. We'd all seen the pictures Alec had mass-texted the day she was born; we'd gotten them just after we'd left Chicago. Carrie had come through labor just fine, Tia was perfectly healthy, with all fingers and toes accounted for, and Alec was madly in love with his girls. Now she was a little over a month old and was cuter than ever.

"He's so not gonna want to leave home," Kate said with a chuckle as she looked around Edward's arm. "She's so cute!"

"No, he said he's coming. He'll be in Vegas like he'd promised," I assured them. "He stopped by to see the studio, and he helped Harry with a few things. In fact, keep scrolling, and you'll see the renovation progress."

I sat back, sipping my coffee as Edward kept scrolling. Tony muttered that he'd better get on the road, so he took his spot in the driver's seat and told us all to settle in. Once they'd gone through all the pictures, Edward handed me back the tablet, leaving one picture open. I grinned, glancing from me holding Tia to his face. He wanted it. He wanted it all. I could see it all over his face.

I merely nodded, leaning in to kiss him. "Yes to that, too, Edward."

Edward reclined back on the bench, and I leaned my back to his chest, his legs on either side of mine. I toyed with the tear in the knee of his jeans as everyone slowly let the rumble of the bus lull them into their own quiet activities. This was my favorite part of touring. The small, quiet moments, the world flying by outside the windows as Edward held me through it all.

Edward pressed kisses to my head, and then his lips were at my ear. "We should tell them."

Turning, I pressed my forehead to his cheek and nodded. "We should. Rose first, I imagine. I mean, if you're serious about Vegas…"

His chuckle shook us both, but he shook his head as his voice was only for me to hear. "I was kinda kidding, Bella, but not really. We can wait until the tour is over and do shit the right way."

"That's Edward talking," I teased him, laughing at his grin. "How's Masen feel about such things?"

He huffed a laugh, gazing out the window. "He wants you his as soon as fucking possible."

"Well, too late for that," I sang, kissing that strong neck where his pulse pounded. "That happened the second you came barreling into my bar. You knocked me on my ass in more ways than one."

He laughed, his head falling back as he scrubbed his face with both hands, only to rake them through his hair. When he finally met my gaze, he shrugged. "Angel, I don't know. I'm torn. What do _you_ want?" He kissed my lips and then my cheek, putting his lips at my ear. "You want the big wedding – church, big dress, and all – it's yours. You want to slip away and just have it be me and you, done. So…you tell me."

I studied his face, and I could see he honestly didn't know what to pick. The thought of a giant church wedding and all the fluff, frills, and pomp that went along with it made me want to claw my own skin off. It wasn't me. And I didn't think it was Edward either – and definitely not Masen – though I could see him going through it simply for the outcome.

Tanya hissed a curse, glaring over Rose's shoulder, and both of us were pulled out of our small private, whispering bubble to glance over at them.

"Oh my fucking hell," Tanya sighed, looking to us and shaking her head. "Guess who's accepted an invitation to the VMAs? She'll be one of the presenters."

"Heidi," I stated without any inflection in my tone.

"Queen Twatwaffle herself." She pointed to the laptop Rose was glaring daggers at and added, "Says here, you two will be…presenting together."

I snorted into an ugly laugh, and I wasn't the only one, but Edward was still. When I looked up at him, his face was resigned yet fierce. It was one of those moments where I could see just how tired he was of being put into positions that made him uncomfortable. Putting him with Heidi at the award show made sense, simply because she'd been in two of Radiant Eclipse's videos, one of which was up for an award that very night. However, their relationship that had stemmed from it was over, and he didn't want to be in the same auditorium with her, much less share a microphone for a few minutes to give away an award. Whether she had pulled strings to get that result or someone else thought it would be a genius idea, it didn't matter. What mattered was that my Edward wasn't happy, but I knew what would make him smile, make him feel like he had control over his life.

"Vegas," I whispered to him, and his dark gaze snapped to mine. "I want Vegas. I want to fly our parents out, but I want it small. Private…like no one outside of this." I gestured a thumb behind us. "Nothing big. Nothing flashy. Just those who matter most. And when it's all over…we'll tell the world."

Edward's handsome face flushed a beautiful pink, but his eyes looked at me with heat and love and want.

"Done."

"But you're telling Rose," I whispered, grinning at his dramatic expression of fear.

Edward's lips met mine, teasing, tasting, claiming. "I love you, and you're gonna tell her with me." My giggle made him smile against my lips. "But we'll wait until Phoenix…at least we can hide in the hotel room when she snaps."

I buried my laugh into his neck, and his colorful arms wrapped all the way around me, holding me close as kisses pressed to my cheek.

"Sounds like a plan, Edward."

**~oOo~**

"You wanna do…_what_?!" Rose bellowed, making me flinch.

I groaned, rubbing my face as I sat on the edge of the hotel bed in Phoenix. We were about to get ready to grab dinner with the band before sound check. Edward couldn't hold off telling his brother and sister-in-law any longer.

"Hey, that's kinda awesome! Congrats, baby bro!" Emmett cheered, starting for his brother, but he stopped dead in his tracks when his wife shot him a withering glare. He grinned, shaking his head. "Relax, Rosie… You knew it would happen."

"Yeah! Eventually!" She raised her arms up and let them fall back to her sides. "Do have _any_ idea what kind of media chaos will be all over that? And just how do you expect to keep it quiet?!"

Edward's jaw rolled when he gritted his teeth, and I knew he was about five seconds from losing his temper.

"You would deny me this? After all the bullshit I've done? I've jumped through every goddamn hoop, been paraded all over the fucking world…and you'd shut me down on this, Rose?"

"I… I…" Rose faltered, her gaze softening. "No, Edward. That's not… It's just…"

Emmett walked to her. "Aw, hell, babe… This isn't much different than what you and I did."

That really melted her. "I know that, too! But your face isn't sprawled on T-shirts, magazine covers, and CD cases!"

"It could be! I'm damned cute!"

The giggle that erupted out of me couldn't be stopped if I'd glued my damn lips together. Edward shot a glance my way, his own temper fading just a little. His grin was a quick flash of adorable amusement.

"We're getting married," Edward said, though the fight in him was down to a heavy urge instead of being five seconds away from stomping his foot like a petulant child.

"No one has to know," I added, getting up from the bed and cupping Edward's sweet yet slightly hurt face when he rounded on me. "Until it's done." I added the latter, not breaking my gaze from his, and he leaned in to kiss my forehead. Facing Rose, I said, "People get married every day, Rose. They do it with ginormous parties, in tiny little churches, in secret at the courthouse…" I gestured to Emmett, who nodded, because that's how they'd been married. "They run off to Vegas…" I urged, raising an eyebrow. "Legally, there's nothing stopping us. In reality, we didn't have to tell you." I held up a hand when she started to argue. "_But_…we wanted you to know. We wanted everyone who mattered to be there. We can keep it quiet until it's done."

"Why now? Why can't you wait until we're home?" Rose asked us, her eyes flickering between us.

"I don't want to wait," Edward stated, and where that could've sounded childish, it came out simple and sweet and completely honest. He shrugged a shoulder. "We shouldn't _have_ to wait. What I do on stage and in the recording studio has nothing to do with my personal life, Rosalie. Not anymore. I won't let my career – the career I don't regret…not a fucking second – dictate what goes on behind closed doors. I just can't do it anymore. Aro did that enough, and now that he's gone, I'm done. I won't act like something I'm not. I've played the part long enough. I have zero problem doing what I do on stage and in interviews. None. It was fine when we were kids and it didn't matter, when it didn't hurt anyone. Now it's different. I won't hide who I am, who I love, who I want to spend the rest of my life with. I just won't. I love her, and that won't change tomorrow, when we reach Vegas, or even if we waited for a hundred years."

"Aw, fuck… You're killing me, brother-in-law," she sighed, smirking my way when my eyes welled up with just how sweet that was. "And just _how the hell_ did you think we'd pull it off?"

Smiling, I leaned into Edward's side. "That's kinda why we wanted to tell you, Rose."

She laughed, and while it was probably a humorless gut reaction to the whole stressful moment, she genuinely smiled our way. She sighed deeply, rubbing her temple with two fingers. "Okay, okay… You know we have to tell the rest of them, because I damn sure am gonna need Tanya's and Kate's help, not to mention Alice, who may kill you both dead."

Edward grinned, rushing to his sister-in-law and hugging her. "We don't need a big…thing," he told her softly. "Or fancy. That's just not us. We just wanted…"

She stopped him, nodding a little. "I know. I get it." She leaned into Emmett when he draped an arm around her shoulders. "Just… Oh, guys…" She shook her head slowly. "You will cause an explosion. Good, bad, shocked…just a huge blowup. You need to brace for it. I can only prepare you so much, but if we can keep it quiet until it's all over, then you'd better hold on to your asses, because you're in for a shit-storm."

"We know," Edward and I said at the same time.

"No, I don't think you do, because you'll be walking the red carpet at the VMAs when you should be honeymooning," she stated firmly, pointing a finger at us. "You release that information before you get to L.A., and they're going to be all over you."

Edward smiled, and it was evil and sexy and mischievous all at the same time, and the blush that graced his scruffy cheeks made me want to do things to him that I had no business thinking about since we were about to leave for the arena. I could see that all he wanted was control of his life back, to do what he wanted, when he wanted, and do it in spite of the rumors that floated around out there.

"We're aware." His statement was firm, but his tenor was deep and slow. "We'd be doing this – award show or not. It's what we want." His hand slipped into mine, linking our fingers together. "The timing of this is a bonus, Rosie."

She narrowed her eyes on him, but her shoulders sagged in defeat. "I… Fuck, I honestly can't blame you for that one. Truly, those old-as-hell rumors need to be put to rest." She smiled at him, and it was just as evil as his. "Releasing this will be…interesting…"

She was already hard at work, thinking about it, and she started for the door. "Let's go. You don't want to be late for sound check."

Emmett stopped with his hand on the door knob. "You get to tell the parents why their second son is denying them a wedding, too. Poor Mom… She wanted the big, fluffy shit…cake and all."

"Oh, yeah, 'cause I look like the kinda guy on top of a wedding cake," Edward drawled, gesturing to his ink-covered arms.

Emmett grinned, yanking open the door. "You're still telling them."

Edward and I didn't move when Rose and Emmett walked out of our hotel room. When the door clicked closed, I found myself tossed to the bed and a tall, inked god of a man looming over me, suddenly kissing me until I forgot my name. He pressed deliciously down onto me, our denim rubbing together in ways that made me wrap my legs around his hips and pull him in closer. We lost ourselves for a moment – lips and tongues claiming and tasting. Edward braced a hand by my head, but his free one was everywhere he could reach.

When he pulled away from my mouth, I groaned at the loss of him, but his eyes were wicked and deadly. "Fuck, I should've waited until later to tell her. Now I want you, and we don't have time to do all the things I want to do to you."

"Save it up, baby," I breathed against his sharp jaw, trailing my lips across his throat. "Save it for after your show. Then…you can be all sorts of selfish…"

He hummed, licking his bottom lip slowly, only to bite down hard on it like he was fighting everything he had not to rip every piece of clothing from me. Just when I thought he'd say something naughty and laced with innuendo, he shocked me.

"Angel… I… Damn, baby, I can't wait to marry you," he whispered, his cheeks pinking up with just the right amount of color to make me smile.

"Me, either," I agreed, raking my fingers through his hair that I had now truly sent into disarray. "You might wanna wear a hat," I noted, grinning at his deep chuckle. "Just sayin'."

He dropped a heavy, dramatically loud kiss to my lips. "Okay, let me grab one and go before she comes back in here with Senna's whip or some shit."

Laughing, I collapsed back onto the bed when he pushed off me. "Don't knock being tied up, Edward Cullen."

His face fell in a shocked expression as he gaped at me as I sat up.

"You might like it," I told him, getting up, picking up my bag, and walking to the door. When he grabbed a baseball cap and pulled it on, he walked to me, and I kissed his cheek. "It's the _ultimate_ in selfish, baby," I whispered, opening the door for him.

"You're killin' me, angel," he muttered, shaking his head. "Just fucking _killing me_!"

Smiling innocently at him, I shrugged a shoulder. "But you love me."

He sighed, smiling and kissing me before we reached the elevator doors. "God, yes. More and more every damn day."

**~oOo~**

"This is a first for me."

Glancing around the large private reception room, I nodded in agreement. My heart was too full today. And as I gazed around at the clusters of conversations, I smiled. My mom was deep in conversation with Esme, who hadn't let go of Carlisle's hand since they'd walked into the room. Felix was guarding the door, with Emmett by his side and Tony nearby. Jasper, Jacob, and my brother were teasing Alec as he held his baby daughter. Alice, Tanya, Kate, Carrie, and Rose were sitting at a large table with Garrett, Maggie, Tori, Harry, and Demetri, swapping old gig stories.

And the most important person was sitting right behind me, waiting for his turn yet unable to stay away from me, no matter who was in the room. We'd been separated since we'd arrived at the hotel in Vegas the day before, and now that the ceremony was complete, I didn't see him letting me out of arm's reach for very long.

I flinched at the pinch of my skin so close to the bone but smiled at Angela when she raised an eyebrow at me.

"Almost done," she said, dabbing at ink and blood and skin before adding the final touches to my wedding band.

Kisses were pressed to the side of my head, and I tried my best to control the idiotic smile that spread across my face when I looked over at my husband.

_Husband._

The ceremony had been brief and very private. No one was allowed inside this room, and we owed it all to the girls sitting at the table. The _very second_ Kate and Tanya had heard the news, they'd taken control of everything. They'd planned every detail – not that we'd wanted a big deal – and they'd made arrangements for everyone to be here, not to mention forced everyone involved into secrecy. And that included my friend, and tattooist, Angela.

"Which part is a first, Ang?" I asked her in order to distract myself from the heat Edward was giving off next to me. "Wedding bands? Or being flown somewhere to do it?"

She grinned. She was a shy thing, and I'd known her since college. Her artwork was stunning, always. And she'd decided to forego painting on canvas in order to paint on skin. I'd been her first client before she'd even been certified, and I'd never regretted it. She was the one responsible for all four of my tattoos – now five – and she'd been the one to pierce me, which Edward found highly entertaining.

"Yes," she said with a laugh, dabbing at my skin again. "Both. It feels…kinda awesome to be flown in by a band in order to do a private session."

Edward chuckled, but his eyes were dark as he watched her finish the design on my left ring finger. Angela had designed it for us, but it was Edward's idea – or Masen's, really. After we'd told Rose about our engagement, what we'd wanted in Vegas, Edward and I had sat down to truly talk about the details. Diamonds were pretty, and rings were traditional, but we weren't traditional people. Nothing about our relationship was normal to those outside our circle of family and friends. And as much as Edward meant what he said about giving me anything I wanted, I had wanted…different. Even though diamonds were forever, ink was permanent. When Edward and I had said _until death do us part_, we'd meant it.

"You're set, Bella," Angela said with a smile, patting the top of the table. "Next, handsome."

Edward smirked at the compliment and placed his hand down on the table as she got ready. She changed gloves and needles, then put the design lightly on his skin before getting started. They would match. It was a music staff, complete with the notes to the chorus of the song Edward had written for me, the first song that would be recorded by Radiant Eclipse at Chainsaw Records once they were home from tour, and the prayer Edward had written for when we were apart. It was perfect and so us. It was a beautiful reminder of all we'd been through, and it meant everything to the two of us.

It also posed as a reminder for when we were apart, which was inevitable in the future and something with which we'd come to terms.

"Bella! Let us see!" I heard Tanya yell from across the room.

Grinning, I started to stand, but Edward's free arm locked down around my waist. Kissing his lips, I mumbled, "I'll be right back." I kissed his cheek too, whispering in his ear. "You can't blame a girl for wanting to show off her ring, baby. When Angela's done, you're all mine."

He blinked slowly, his eyes almost pitch black with want, framed by long eyelashes just as dark. He bit down on his lip, but I laughed because he obviously couldn't say what he wanted in front of my friend. Edward's love for me was all over his handsome face. Today had been amazing, and he was dressed to absolute distraction. Alice had done a phenomenal job with the two of us. She'd worked with our personalities, not tradition. He was in a black silk suit – though, the crazy thing still wore his Docs and the jacket had already been discarded – and I was in a very pretty white dress, but neither of us looked like we belonged on the top of a wedding cake.

I raked my fingers through his newly trimmed hair and then down his smoothly shaven face. The thoughts of where I wanted that face caused my vision to blur. I finally stood, and he let me.

"I'm not going far. Promise," I vowed in his ear, kissing his sharp jaw before walking away.

Before I could get to Tanya and the girls at the table, I was intercepted by my mother, Esme, and Carlisle. The latter pulled me into a big hug.

"You look beautiful, Bella," he whispered, pulling back to cup my face as he smiled sweetly. "You know, you didn't have to go alcohol free…"

Giggling, I kissed his cheek. "Have you seen this crowd drunk?" I countered, raising an eyebrow at him as he laughed and shook his head. "They can drink on their own, but alcohol in this room would not be conducive to keeping this event quiet. Jacob, alone, yells when he thinks he's whispering when he's been drinking. Just…they can wait. They just need to shut up for the next twenty-four hours."

Esme laughed but opened her arms to me.

I hugged her fiercely. "I'm so glad you came."

"God, sweetheart. Look at my son. _Look at him! _He's so happy. How could I miss this?" She smirked Emmett's way. "Neither of my boys wanted to do things the old-fashioned way. But they're their own men. Their marriages suit them."

I hugged her again. The call we'd made to Edward's parents had been a nail-biting experience. We weren't quite sure how they'd take not only the spur-of-the-moment wedding but the casualness of it all. They'd been fine. Carlisle had laughed, asking what had taken us so long, and Esme had shed tears of joy over the phone line. My mother, who now pulled me into a hug, had been shocked but merely verified my happiness. Of all the people we'd told, she had been the one we'd worried about the most. She had come to terms with Mike's career choice and Edward's and my relationship, but marriage was another thing altogether.

"Tell Phil I'm sorry he couldn't come," I told my mother with a grin as she eyed my wedding band with a slow shake of her head. She'd never been a fan of ink but never complained, really.

"He wanted to, but he had a conference in Portland." She reached up to toy with a loose curl of mine, finally cupping my face as Carlisle and Esme walked to Edward. "Isabella, are you happy?"

"Yes."

She fought her smile. "Yeah, I guess so, since you're about five seconds from bouncing clean out of your skin." She studied my face. "Good, Bella, you deserve it. And he's… He's a good one. He's all over the news and TV, but… You'd never know it. He's just…normal."

Laughing, I nodded. "Yeah, well…he puts on a good show for the public. He's pretty down to earth behind the scenes."

She nodded, glancing behind me and then back to my face. "I'm glad you guys did things this way, actually," she said, which surprised me. "I mean, you could've just done it all and then told everyone, but this is really intimate and so you, sweetie. And I have to admit… Charlie would want to adopt him." When I nodded and laughed, she smiled again. "So…when are you home again?"

I took a deep breath because our itinerary was pretty hectic. "The band plays here tomorrow night, and then we're off to California – San Diego, San Bernardino, then L.A., where we'll attend the Video Music Awards. The band is up for like three of them. And then when the guys head to San Francisco, I'll come home. Garrett and Tori promised they'd help me move Edward's things into my place, and I've got to figure out if I'm going to rent out the apartment. Not to mention, I have to finish with the studio."

"Busy, busy," she teased. "Good, I'm glad. Let me know. I'll pick you up." Her eyes drifted past me, and I felt the heat against my back as Edward's left hand appeared under mine, lifting them up to show it off.

Fuck, that was sexy, seeing his finger now marked for me.

Soon, everyone gathered around, and we were enveloped in hugs and well-wishes, but it was Rose's voice that caught my attention.

"Edward, Bella… We need…" Her grin was adorable, but she held up her phone. "We need photos we can 'leak' tomorrow."

She took pictures of our hands with matching rings. Edward put his suit jacket back on, and we posed for a few pictures for her – some of us dancing, some of us kissing, and one or two of us laughing. We kept everyone else out of the pictures, making sure just the two of us went public. There was no need to subject our families and friends to the hubbub once they returned to Seattle.

However, for our own personal collection, we took huge group pictures. I knew the second the phone clicked that the one of Edward's family would be one of my favorites. It was just Edward, Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme. Another favorite was of the band all acting stupid yet all dressed up.

As Edward and I posed for one last picture, Garrett's deep voice asked a question.

"How does one…_leak_ pictures?" he asked, making Emmett chuckle.

"The Internet, dude. My brother's got this fan on Facebook…" He went on to explain.

"Donna will love these," I whispered, making Edward laugh in my ear as we finally relaxed when Rose walked away, scrolling through all the pictures she'd taken. "She's kinda perfect, too. She'll spread them like wildfire."

"Hmm, that's what Rose thinks, too. It'll be Tori who sets them loose."

I turned in his arms, smiling at the pure, unadulterated happiness that was all over his face.

"How much longer do we have to put up with these people?" he asked, grinning against the skin of my forehead when I laughed at his impatience.

"Technically, this is pretty damn high on the selfish list, Edward. No one expects us to think about anyone else but ourselves today," I told him, loving the fact that my heels put me in direct line with his lips. "Damn, I wish I was this tall all the time."

Edward grinned, shaking his head. "No, angel. You're perfect just the way you are."

I hummed against his lips at how sweet that was, and Edward pulled me flush to him as we ignored everyone babbling away behind us. We kissed slowly, softly, and sweetly. We kept it fit for public, but I was slowly burning for him.

"Mrs. Cullen," he growled against my lips.

Pulling back from his mouth, I gazed at him through my suddenly hazy vision. To him, to everyone around us, I was now Mrs. Isabella Cullen. On paper, we'd decided to hyphenate my name – Isabella Swan-Cullen. It was the only way to do it. In fact, to the world, he was still Masen, and he always would be, which meant that I was still Isabella Swan, daughter of Chainsaw Charlie Swan. Rose would be using that tomorrow when the news of our private, secret wedding went global. But privately…I was Edward's wife. Edward, not Masen. And that meant everything to me.

"I have two surprises for you," he rasped, still looking at me like he could eat me alive, but he also looked like an excited little boy. It was a heady combination on him.

"What are they?" I asked out of pure curiosity.

He smiled, shaking his head. "Well, they aren't fit for public, angel."

The loud chatter from the people behind us made me smile, but it was Edward's slow backwards walk toward the elevator that made me start to laugh as he tugged me with him. Surreptitiously, he pressed the up arrow on the wall, and when the doors slid quietly open, he pulled us quickly into the car, slamming his hand on the top-floor button.

Just as everyone noticed we'd slipped away, the elevator doors slid closed. I heard their yells and laughter, but it all faded away as we rose up and as Edward suddenly had me pressed into the wall of the elevator car.

"Edward…_fuck_…" I panted against his lips, but his hands and lips were everywhere. When his strong hand lifted my leg up by my thigh to wrap around his, my eyes rolled back at the feel of him pressing into me. "Edward…Edward…" I tried again, grinning in spite of it all. "Baby…cameras," I finally blurted out.

His forehead fell to my shoulder, but his hand beneath my thigh just kept rubbing. Over and over, his fingers teased just beneath the edge of the bottom of my dress.

"It's been fucking torture all damn day, angel. If I don't get you out of this elevator…and this goddamn dress soon, I'll fucking lose my mind."

The ping of the elevator reaching its destination made me jump a little. Edward immediately pushed back, taking my hand. He guided me down the corridor to a room on the end and slipped the keycard into the door.

My mouth fell open at the sight of the suite lit with what seemed like hundreds of candles. It was gorgeous.

"This is the first surprise," Edward said softly behind me. "I had all our stuff moved up here, though…" He chuckled a little. "I think our friends decided we needed food and champagne." He pointed toward the table that was set up, bottle of bubbly on ice included.

"It's beautiful," I whispered, turning to face him.

His face reddened as he shrugged a shoulder. "I just… It's just… I know we aren't going to get a honeymoon until this tour is over, so…I wanted at least _this_ to be special."

"I don't need a honeymoon, Edward," I told him, pushing at him until he sat down on the edge of the bed, and then I stepped between his legs after kicking out of my shoes. They may have made me taller, but my feet were tired. Edward followed my lead, the thump of his Docs almost loud in the quiet room. "We travel…_you travel_ all the damn time. You know what would be a honeymoon for me?" I asked him, and his sweet face broke into an even sweeter expression of simple, happy curiosity. "Home. When you're home, we'll just…lounge around like slugs. We'll order pizza and sleep in. We'll never get dressed some days." I cupped his face, kissing him softly. "But this is beautiful. Thank you."

"That sounds just about perfect, angel. Count me in."

He smiled with pride, his hands holding on to my waist. He let go with one hand, picking up my left in order to give a light kiss to my fresh ink. He seemed to study it and his own, staying quiet for a moment.

Finally, he licked his lips, meeting my gaze. "I know… I know that we decided against the traditional rings, but I…I wanted to give you some sort of something sparkly."

Giggling at how cute he was, I cupped his face. "What'd you do, Edward?"

He swallowed nervously, but he smiled as he reached into the inside pocket of his suit coat before shedding the thing completely. He pulled out a black velvet box. "I… I've told you before, I don't give a damn what anyone thinks of us. I never have. I told you that going into Pike Place that day. Everything about us is…it's mine, yours, ours. Whatever misconceptions come out of our wedding tomorrow, I need you to understand that, I need you confident in me. I don't…_care_ what they say; nothing will tear me away from you. Ever." He held up his left hand, showing off the blaringly dark ink on his finger. "This is everything. And this isn't what most will understand. But outside of this room, I couldn't care less what the opinion is."

He huffed a light laugh. "I teased you that you'd be marrying both Edward and Masen." He grinned at my chuckle, leaning in to kiss me when I pressed my lips to his. "And I know you love us both, and we're crazy about you, but…I wasn't kidding when I said Masen wanted one thing while Edward wanted something more traditional. I felt…wrong? Maybe? I don't know if that's the word, angel, but it fits. I felt like something was missing when I didn't do the bended knee, pretty ring proposal thing."

"I didn't feel that way, baby." I was honest about that. I loved everything about how we got to the moment we were experiencing.

"I know that, but still… I wanted to give you something, something that said forever – a token, I guess." He held the box up and met my gaze with wide, honest, worried eyes. "This is… Well, shit…it's kinda from both of us. The sentiment is Edward, _what_ they are is from Masen."

Laughing a little at that convoluted explanation, I took the box and opened it. My gasp was sharp at what I was seeing. Diamonds glittered in the candlelight; they were bright and clear and beautiful.

"I had them made for you," he stated, glancing from my face to the box.

He'd given me three new piercings – two straight bars with diamonds on each end for my nipples and one teardrop-shaped diamond dangling from a round one for my bellybutton. They were high-end and just perfect. There was no telling exactly how much they'd cost him, and I didn't want to know. They were stunning.

"Edward, baby…they're…gorgeous," I whispered in awe of them, and I met his sweet, bright-green eyes. I realized what he'd done. He didn't need an expensive ring to show the world any-damn-thing. That simply wasn't Edward. Or Masen, for that matter. He'd done this as something personal, private, and just ours. He didn't have to prove a fucking thing to anyone…but he'd give me the world. "I love you, and thank you."

His worried face broke out into a big grin, but he froze when I handed the velvet box back.

"You should do it," I told him.

His eyes darkened as he shook his head no, but his hand took the box from me slowly. I wanted to laugh at him, but I didn't. He seemed to be a heartbeat away from tossing me onto the bed and fucking me senseless, which I wanted, truly. However, I could tell both of us wanted to take our time. He set the box down on the bed beside his leg, reaching out to tug me closer.

"I've been studying this dress all damn day," he whispered, turning me around so he could pull the zipper down. "I imagined a thousand ways to get you out of it."

When white fabric pooled around my feet, I turned to face him again, clad only in white lace and silk. Warm hands with calloused fingers from years of playing guitar reached out to touch. He skimmed over my ink, across the lace of my underwear, and around to my back in order to trail lightly down my spine.

When he reached for the clasp of my bra, I stopped him. "Wait. My turn."

Edward stood silently, tall and seemingly nervous, but he let me tug his shirt from his pants. I unbuttoned it slowly, revealing colorful skin, swirls of ink, and a beautiful, strong chest. I studied the ink, loving every inch of it, but I also knew as much as I was attracted to tattoos, he could've been completely free of ink, and I would've loved the man in front of me, no matter what. He was so beautiful – inside and out. He was sweet and thoughtful and probably the most giving and selfless person I'd ever met. The whole world loved the idea of him, but I loved the real man behind the mask he put on for the masses. It was that man who made up the other half of me, who'd come stumbling into my bar one night, bringing color and laughter and love with him. It was the man behind the mask who was all mine; no one would know him the way I did.

He let me push his shirt off his shoulders, and it joined my dress on the floor. Edward was breathtaking as he stood in front of me in just black dress pants. My hands skimmed over abs and pecs and ink, wrapping around his neck, and instantly, I was lifted into strong arms.

Holding me with one hand, he deftly removed my bra, which made me giggle against his lips. He smiled and raised a sexy eyebrow at me, dropping the apparently offensive undergarment to the floor before crawling us both up onto the bed.

The feel of his warm, smooth skin against mine caused me to pull him closer, and we were kissing like we'd never come up for air. The weight of him pressed down onto me. His elbow braced by my head as his free hand touched everywhere. My legs wrapped around his thighs, and I moaned in want of him. I wanted closer, more.

When Edward's kisses left my lips and started moving south, my breathing picked up. He pushed up on one hand, trailing fingers lightly around my nipples, but his sweet gaze met mine for help.

Smiling, I nodded a little, showing him how to remove all the piercings, and he reached for the box. He started with the bellybutton, grinning evilly as I squeaked and squirmed beneath him when it tickled. He leaned over, pressing kisses to my stomach when he was done. He eyed my bare chest with dark, hungry eyes.

"Hmm," he hummed softly, leaning down to press a light kiss to one. "Ladies…you're gonna have to help me out." He grinned at my silent laugh, but when his lips enveloped my nipple, I just about came up off the bed. My moan was shameless and loud, and Edward's tongue rolled around my peak before popping off it. Blowing lightly across wet skin, he practically caused me to come at how hard they were. "There, angel, that's better," he murmured into my skin.

I was shaking as he put the first one in, and by the time the second one was finished, I was sweating, gripping onto his biceps with trembling hands.

"Edward…please!" I cried out. "It's…too much!"

"Shh, angel. I'll take care of you. I'll take care of my _wife_," he vowed in a tone so deadly, the sweat on my forehead started to roll back into my hair.

He shifted off the bed and dropped his pants, only to crawl back up and reach for my underwear. They, too, were swiftly removed. We moved quickly together, and then he slid slowly, deeply inside me, whispering words of love, that he would take his time later, that I was the best thing that ever happened to him.

**~oOo~**

_Rock's Royal Couple Wed in Secret Ceremony_

_Rock's Royalty Due to Walk Red Carpet at VMAs_

_Masen No Longer Eligible Bachelor_

_Daughter of Chainsaw Charlie Swan Now Married to Radiant Eclipse's Masen_

_Heidi Summers Unwilling to Comment on Ex's Secret Wedding_

The last headline made me snort to myself. Glancing up and out the windows of the giant limo the boys had decided they wanted, I could see that we were still in line to hit the red carpet. The car was filled with chatter. And I smiled at my nervous brother, who had flown his girl in for this thing. Lauren looked scared – very pretty but scared shitless.

I wasn't much better. This was the first really big event Edward and I were attending together, and it was going to be chaos.

The "leaked" pictures of our wedding Tori set loose on Facebook went viral. They'd exploded all over the Internet. They'd set off shocked reactions, welcomed celebrations, and more than once had I seen them on the cover of gossip rags. Some claimed they were fake, and others said they were real. There had been speculation that I was pregnant, that I'd signed a huge prenup, that I _hadn't_ signed a prenup, and that our relationship was a PR thing.

Not a bit of that shit mattered. Everyone inside that limo knew the truth. Everyone at home knew the truth. And the man currently reaching for my hand didn't give a rat's ass about what anyone else thought.

Edward carried himself differently now that we were married. His shoulders were held high, not weighted down with stress. His face was quick to brighten with a smile. Where he used to duck and avoid the paps, now he simply walked through them, barely batting an eye.

Linking our fingers together, he brought my hand up to kiss the back of it. "You ready?"

"No," I said with a laugh, which made him flash a quick grin. "That long stretch of red carpet will be pure hell."

"No, it won't," he argued softly with a laugh, leaning in to kiss me lightly. "You look beautiful." He tilted my face up so I was looking directly into fierce, honest green. "I won't let go of your hand the whole way. Promise."

Smirking, I knew that wasn't true, simply because the boys would be asked to pose for pictures, and they'd be interviewed along the way. But it was a sweet sentiment.

"Thank you, though." I pointed to him. "You look very handsome, _Masen_," I told him, having to remind myself to use his stage name.

He grinned, adjusted his jacket, and thanked me with a quick kiss. Alice had outdone herself with all of us. There was an edge to every dress and every guy's suit. Edward was in all black – black suit jacket, black jeans, black button-up shirt with his ink barely peeking out, and of course, his black Docs. I was in red leather, and when she first posed the idea to me, I about laughed myself sick, but the dress was beautiful, with classic lines, strapless, and not at all as crazy as I'd originally thought.

The limo came to a stop and the door was opened.

I turned to Edward, saying, "I hope you win."

He laughed, and it was sweet and beautiful to see on his face. He kissed my almost healed wedding band. "Angel, I've already won."

I kissed him. Hard. Pulling back quickly as everyone shifted to step out onto the red carpet, I reached up to wipe my lipstick off his lips, which made him chuckle.

"I love you."

"I love you, too, Bella. Now…let me show the world how much," he whispered, stepping out the limo door, but his hand stayed held out, waiting for me.

The eruption of cheers and screams when he stepped out could rival that of one of Radiant Eclipse's shows. The very second I put my hand in his, the explosion was deafening. Flashes of cameras, screams from fans, and calls of our names from the media made it impossible to actually hear anything.

It was a blur, most of it, moving down the long carpet. It was stops for pictures and to answer questions. It was the guys seeing fellow musicians they knew. Like I'd predicted, the guys were ripped away from us to pose for a few pictures, but they were right back to us quickly, only to run into the last interviewer before we got inside the theater.

"Radiant Eclipse, you're up for three awards tonight. This isn't your first. You nervous?" the woman asked, and it was Jasper who stepped up to the microphone.

"Naw, we're just happy to be here. We're in good company."

"You are in amazing company, Jasper," she agreed, turning toward Edward and me. Edward's arm around my waist squeezed me closer. "Masen, I hear congratulations are in order. You've recently been married to the beautiful girl at your side."

To watch Edward switch from my Edward to the world's Masen was humorous. The slow, sexy grin curled up one corner of his mouth as he nodded to her. His eyes were playful and easygoing, but he pulled me closer.

"Thank you. I'm a lucky man," he stated firmly.

"Now, Bella, you're the daughter of the famous guitarist, Chainsaw Charlie Swan. Did you two meet when Radiant Eclipse filmed there?

Edward and Rose had decided that the best way to answer that question was with the truth.

"Actually, no," I answered, feeling Edward's kiss to my shoulder. "We met just before that, but we've been together ever since."

"Well, congratulations and good luck tonight. All of you."

We were dismissed, and we turned to wave to the crowd of photographers. A few questions were yelled out, one catching my ears.

"What? No diamond ring, Masen?"

"Oh, I have diamonds on her," he whispered in my ear, only to glance down to my chest as a salacious grin spread over his face at my cleavage. He made me laugh, and just like that, not a bit of it mattered.

The show was long, and parts of it were boring. Edward kept me entertained with whispers in my ear of the shit he'd seen about the celebrities around us – who was sleeping with whom, who was probably high as a fucking kite, and who was the most demanding. The first couple of awards Radiant Eclipse was nominated for, they didn't win, not that the boys cared. They'd won before. Edward was removed from his seat in order to present an award, and Rose and I sat forward, nervous for him. He had to step out onto that stage with Heidi.

"Oh, Jesus, she's pissed," Rose whispered to me.

I smirked, but she was right. Edward had specifically offered her his left arm to lead her out to the podium, and her eyes were locked on to that beautiful wedding band ink on his finger. The girl looked like she'd eaten a lemon, and when she spoke, her voice was stiff and bitter. Edward, however, looked like he owned the damn world.

"He's so fucking puffed up right now," Jasper chuckled in my ear. "He could fly, if he wanted to."

Giggling, I nodded. What was even better was that she wouldn't touch him on their way backstage. Edward didn't return, and the last nomination they were up for was next. It was the song they'd released from the most recent album, and the video had been cut directly from the show they'd filmed at my bar. It was the one they kind of wanted most.

"And the award goes to… Radiant Eclipse!"

Our whole row just about jumped up out of their seat. I hugged Jasper, Jacob, and Alec but kissed my brother's cheek before the boys met Edward, who stepped out from the curtain. There were fist bumps, high-fives, and guy-hugs up there, and Masen was in full-on performing mode when he held up the award.

Where usually Jasper took the microphone, it was Masen who did this time, and the screams of love and adoration echoed over the whole theater. He took a breath, gazing out over the audience.

"We want to thank the usual cast of characters: Volturi Records; Rose, our manager; and our families who put up with what we do…but we'd all like to thank one person this time. Without her, we wouldn't have made this video, we wouldn't have found a place filled with so much musical history, and I…personally…" He placed his hand on his chest. "I wouldn't have found the one person I can't live without. My wife." He held up the award. "This is for you, Bella Swan."

"Bella!" the whole band yelled and cheered.

The crowd around us went crazy, Rose wrapping an arm around me when my tears welled up in emotion.

"Love you, angel," he stated firmly, looking our way, even though he couldn't see us.

And with that, Radiant Eclipse was led off the stage. The man himself had just smashed every rumor that had ever lived. He'd just taken everything Aro had tried to destroy, and he'd owned it. The mask he'd worn for so long was gone. Masen had wanted to show the world, and he'd just done it. And he'd done it _his_ way, with a sweetness and honesty that only he had. Nothing would ever be the same.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… This chapter ran long…if only because I needed the last chapter in Edward's POV. As I write these notes, I'm nearing the end of the last regular chapter. You'll have that for Sunday. That will leave just the epi to post. **

**The ink wedding bands, the diamond body jewelry, and a stunning manip of Edward and Bella at the VMAs is on FB and Twitter. Beffers87 did an amazing job on that manip for me. The playlist is in its normal place, as well.**

**Before you ask… I have NOT forgotten about Aro. ;) Please trust me on this. Karma is a nasty, grudge-holding bitch, but she's patient, too. **

**I'm hoping that I'll see you guys Sunday for the last regular chapter. From there, we'll see. Until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	26. Angels Looking After Me

**A/N… Okay, guys, this is the last regular chapter. :( I know, I know…there's a part of me that doesn't want it to end either. I'll let you get to it, but see me at the bottom concerning the epi…**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 26 – Angels Looking After Me**

_I've been away,  
Searching for a reason,  
Another purpose to find.  
I've sailed the seas,  
Fought my many demons,  
I've looked to gods in the skies._

_I've stood in hell,_  
_Where many had to suffer,_  
_I stared the devil in the eyes._  
_Walked many roads to witness ancient idols,_  
_And found the great gates of fire._

_Had many storms question my conviction,_  
_Gave armies reason to rise._  
_The hangman's searching for bones he can borrow,_  
_While I escaped in the night,_  
_Fight or flight._

_Live again,_  
_All roads end,_  
_I'll be coming home._  
_Tend your light,_  
_'Cause on this night,_  
_I'll be coming home._

_Escaped the hail of calculated mortars,_  
_Then drank the blood of a king._  
_The desert rain has washed away direction,_  
_Had angels looking after me,_  
_So it seems._

"_Coming Home" – Avenged Sevenfold_

**EDWARD**

"You know, we could let Felix go home, Edward," Bella stated, watching the man in question guard the door of the VIP lounge at the airport in San Francisco.

"Humor me, angel," I pleaded, cupping her face. "Right now, he's just about the only one I trust to keep you safe, aside from myself or Emmett."

She sighed, her face breaking into a placating smile. "You'd think that the shock of it all would've worn off by now."

Chuckling, I took a seat on one of the benches and pulled her to stand between my legs. "I did kinda throw it in their faces on global TV, baby." When she chuckled, I pulled her in to kiss her inked finger, then that beautiful heart shaped E, and finally her lips. "Worth it, though," I murmured against her lips, pulling back to look at her. "I'll make a deal with you. Once you're home safe, with my dad, Garrett, and Harry around, then you can give Felix a break, okay?"

"Good, 'cause he's got a family he misses."

"I'm aware. He's also being paid very well to watch over the most important thing to me, so… He's not exactly complaining, Bella. He'll be able to put that kid of his through college without batting an eye. Plus, he likes you, respects you."

She smirked my way, and I opened my mouth to continue to plead my case, but she placed her fingers over my lips. "I get it. We're riding out the storm, Edward. I get it."

I relaxed a little, because the word _storm_ was right. The media, who had taken our "leaked" wedding pictures and run with them, were now a speculating machine. Bella was pregnant, she'd stolen me from Heidi, she was using me for her own monetary benefit… The list was endless. And the list was fucking stupid.

However, there were multiple opinions on it. The fans _loved her_. They thought she was adorable and sweet, shy on camera, which was true. They thought she made me happy. Also true. And they thought my speech at the VMAs was the sweetest thing _ever_, which Bella said was true.

Then there was the Heidi side of it all, which was why Bella had Felix with her ever since the VMAs. Heidi had been pissed, but she'd been pissed because when I got backstage at the awards show, I'd pulled her aside and called her out on everything Aro had put her up to. I'd called her out on her cheating, her quick dismissal of our relationship, and the complete and utter bullshit that she continued to feed to the media. She'd blamed me for it all, which was totally a Heidi thing to do. She cheated because I was never home, which was again bullshit, since she cheated with my fucking drummer, who was gone just as much as I was. When she'd blamed me for her floundering career, I'd laughed, and I'd still been fucking laughing when we'd been shoved out onto the stage that night.

The final straw for Heidi had been the sight of my wedding band. The man she knew never wanted marriage. Masen was a free spirit and a party animal. He couldn't be bothered with a wife or kids. The man she knew had been an unstoppable flirt, a musician solely focused on his career, and someone who never wanted to be tied down. Which just went to prove… Heidi never really knew me at all, nor had she ever bothered to get to know me.

It was Heidi's fans who'd caused the need for Felix to join us in L.A. They'd been vocal about me, about Bella, and about the whole damn thing. They were fucking snowed by Heidi's lies and rumors, but it didn't do any good to fight them. They'd learn to get over it. But in the meantime, they were loud and aggressive and rather foul, so Felix was my wife's shadow when I couldn't be with her.

"Angel, look at me," I whispered, smiling when those deep-brown eyes locked on my face. "We've got a few more shows before the last one in Seattle. Then I'm home. _Home, baby_," I said emphatically. "Home to you, the studio, just…fucking home. Okay? I just need you safe until I get there. That's it. That's all. The paps can kiss my ass, but they need to stay the fuck away from you."

Bella broke out into a sweet, patient smile, cupping either side of my face. She kissed me softly, but I wanted more. I was about to put my wife on a plane to Seattle, and I wouldn't see her for another couple of weeks. Radiant Eclipse had San Francisco, Portland, and finally Seattle to go before the tour was done. Slipping my hand into her hair at her neck, I took more. I kissed her, claimed her, tasted her, and smiled against her lips when my girl moaned.

"I love you," she said, brushing kisses slowly across my lips.

"Love you, too, angel." I took a deep breath, pulling her to sit beside me on the bench and facing her completely. "Talk to me about the apartment. You sure you don't wanna wait until I'm home?"

"No, no…" she said with a grin and a fervent shake to her head. "I want to do this. It won't be that bad, baby."

Narrowing my eyes at her, I tried to see if she was covering up something, but she seemed happy to be going home. "Just…seems like a pain in ass, Bella. That's all. I can pack up my own shit, you know."

She laughed and leaned in to kiss me again. "Moving is always a pain in the ass, no matter the circumstances. Besides, you owe me, Mr. Cullen, and I plan on collecting that as soon as your feet step through the door of _our_ apartment. The more I get you moved in, the less you have to do when you get there, which in turn leaves me plenty of time to collect on some selfish honeymoon time."

Laughing, I nodded, because honestly, who could argue with that logic?

"Right…sleeping in, ordering delivery, no clothes… Yes, ma'am. Got it." I grinned at her, but God, I loved her. "I'm gonna fucking miss you, though," I sighed deeply, kissing her again. "Well, do me a favor… Don't rent out the apartment until I come home. I just… I want to see who you put up there. 'Cause…you know, that last guy…" I teased her, rolling my eyes. "He was trouble."

"Don't I know it." She laughed, raising an eyebrow at me. "But he gave good perks to his landlady."

"Which is why I wanna see the next asshole you put up there!" When she cracked the fuck up, I shook my head. "I guess I should be happy my dad's moving out, huh?"

She smiled again. "Yeah, I guess they reconciled in Vegas."

"Hmm," I hummed, leaning to kiss her forehead. "Apparently what happens in Vegas…goes home to Seattle…_Mrs. Cullen._"

"Yeah," she sighed wistfully.

That face. That one, right there. She was so damned beautiful when I called her by her new name. She wore it with pride and love and honor. She made me want to don armor and fight dragons. She made me feel like I was bigger than life itself. She made me better than I ever thought I could be.

I kissed her again, knowing for a damn fact that time was ticking. I needed to be at the arena for sound check, and her flight was approaching fast. Just as the thought hit my mind, her flight number was called.

Pulling back, I cupped her face. "I love you. I'll check in after the show tonight."

"Don't forget to charge your tablet," she reminded me, and suddenly the list of requests came out of us both, reminding me of the first time I'd left her.

"Don't answer a damn question the media asks you. Let their asses wonder."

"Don't drive Rose crazy; she's just trying to get you through these last few weeks."

"Don't overdo the moving thing, angel. If it's too much or you're not sure, just wait. We'll figure it out."

She stopped and stood up, pulling me with her. She hugged me fiercely, mumbling into my chest, "We always do."

"Yeah, we do," I sighed into the top of her head, because it was damned true. We did always figure it out; no matter how frantic we'd get, we'd find a way through whatever it was.

"I gotta go," she groaned, pushing back but tilting her face up.

"I know," I sighed back, sounding just as forlorn.

"Love you."

I kissed her soundly. "Love you, too."

She stepped away, picking up her carry-on backpack, and Felix pushed away from the door to follow her. He gave me a smile and a nod before opening the door for her to head into security.

It felt strange being the one seeing someone off. Normally it was the other way around. I pulled my baseball cap on and shoved my hands into the pockets of my jeans, making my way back through the San Francisco airport to where Tony was patiently waiting in the car.

**~oOo~**

"Here, sweetie," Tanya urged, taking my empty water bottle away, only to set a warm mug of tea in my hand. "Jesus… At this rate, you'll have no voice by the time we get fucking home." Her nostrils flared as she shook her head while packing up our stuff in the dressing room. "Aro and his brilliant fucking tour schedule. You guys are worn out."

"There's only the Seattle show left, Tanya," I rasped, flinching when she rounded on me.

"Doesn't fucking matter, and stop talking. Just drink!"

I huffed a laugh at her temper, but I couldn't argue with her, so I did as she told me. I also couldn't wait until this damn tour was over…for several reasons. I was anticipating the end of our contract with Volturi with bated breath. I was ready to be home in Seattle not only with my wife but my parents, as well.

My dad was doing exceptionally well, and he was almost back to a full schedule at the hospital. He also had maintained his appointments with Dr. Banner, hospital schedule permitting, and my mother continued to go with him once a week. Apparently it took my wedding to Bella to finally show my mother that life was good, that it was going to go on, despite the DUI, the accident, and my dad's lies. She'd finally admitted her denial of my dad's drinking and that she'd lived under the assumption that he had cheated on her, when he really hadn't. She had to let go of the resentment, had to forgive, and she had to move on, or we'd all be stuck in the limbo she'd created. She also found out about my dad's part in the James-Aro-Bella fiasco, and the fact that he'd stepped up to help Bella showed just how far my dad had come.

And she'd also begged and pleaded for us to be home for the holidays.

The VMAs had been toward the end of summer, so fall was fast approaching. The Seattle show was next…and last. Thank fuck. This would be the first time in a very long time that the boys and I would be home – with no schedule, no recording sessions, and no itinerary – since we'd signed with Volturi Records. We needed a band meeting, but I knew how that shit would go down. We'd re-sign Mike, simply because he was a damned good drummer and he fit in without any problems whatsoever. It would be a longer, better contract, especially since I could see him helping with the writing process. We'd all agree to wait until after the end of the year to even consider setting foot in the recording studio. And the studio… It would be a brand new experience doing it for ourselves. Harry and Demetri had already promised to help, and Jasper and I agreed they'd be amazing teachers, since the two of them had been in this business probably way before any of us were even born.

Wiping the sweat from my face with a towel, I glanced up when Rose stepped into the room. Her face was fierce and angry, and I tried like hell to remember if I'd done anything wrong. There was no telling. Nothing came to mind; I'd kept a pretty low profile since Bella left us in San Francisco.

"I just got off the phone with Caius," she started, directing her fierce gaze to me. "You have an interview with _Music Mania Magazine_."

"Now?" I asked, and it came out almost a whisper, so I sipped the tea Tanya had given me when she raised a deadly, threatening eyebrow at me. Clearing my throat, I asked, "Is it Jessica Stanley again?"

"Yeah, but her photographer isn't allowed in here. I won't have Laurent in the same room with my band." Rose folded her arms across her chest. "If she wants pictures, she can either take them herself or we'll be happy to supply them for her, but that paparazzi schmuck isn't coming in here."

I snorted, looking over at Emmett as he stood by the door. His face was amused, but he wasn't budging from his spot.

"All of us?" I verified, because the last interview was only me, simply because I'd just left rehab.

"At first it was just you, because you know how she is, Edward. She fan-girls all over you. I told her she had to interview everyone in the band if she wanted anything other than the prewritten bullshit I hand out."

Alec grinned, shaking his head. "When, Rosie?"

"Now." She sighed, shaking her head. "Better now than in Seattle. You guys will blow away to the four winds once that show is over. She can, at the very least, get a real discussion." She pointed to me. "And she's gonna be all over you, Mr. Newlywed."

Grinning, I shrugged a shoulder. "Fuck it."

Jasper laughed but sat down beside me, nudging me with his elbow. "You wear marriage like a badge of fucking honor, dude." When I chuckled, it was raspy, and he frowned. "Take it easy talking, yeah? Just one more show, Ed."

Nodding, I sipped the tea, and Tanya handed me another one. This time, it was in the Jack Daniels bottle. Chuckling, I poured it into my mug. Fuck the pretenses. This long-as-hell tour and contract were just about up. Which reminded me…

"Tanya," I called to her, and she frowned down at me. "Wait…" I swallowed thickly. "You and Kate should get the hell outta here. Remember last time Jessica was here?"

Tanya's face broke out into a slow, evil grin. "Oh, yeah…" She pointed a finger my way. "You grabbed my ass for that!"

Laughing, my head fell back to the sofa I was sitting on. "I'm aware. And I believe you reminded me that I was the reason you preferred pussy."

Tanya laughed, especially when Kate, who had been quietly packing stuff up let out a giggle. "Well, not _you_ specifically, Edward."

Jasper snorted into a soft laugh. "Just men in general, I take it."

"Meh," she scoffed, giving me a wink. "You're probably right, though. You'll have enough to deal with as it is; she's gonna want to know all about Bella."

"She can know what I feel she _needs_ to fucking know," I stated, and it came out rather harsh, but it was the truth nonetheless. "My wife's privacy is non-negotiable."

"Good boy," Kate whispered, kissing my forehead. "But don't talk too much. You'll be okay in a day or two, but…no need to push it. Okay?"

Nodding, I sat back next to Jasper, waving Rose on to let the journalist into the dressing room. I shook my head at the fact that the last time I talked to Jessica Stanley was the very same night I'd met my angel. Things had a weird fucking way of coming back around.

Mike and Jacob stepped out of the shower room fully dressed, and the former asked, "What's going on?"

"Interview," Jasper answered. "_Music Mania Magazine._ Just cop a squat somewhere, Mikey."

"Okay."

While we waited for Rose to bring Jessica back into the room, I texted Bella to let her know I'd be late back to the hotel room and why. Jake called Leah for a brief talk with his dad, and Alec checked in with Carrie. Tanya refilled my mug with more tea, giving me another raised eyebrow warning, before taking a load of stuff to the tour bus. At this rate, I wouldn't be getting a shower until the hotel. I was still shirtless from the end of the show, but I couldn't care less, really. I did, however, cover up my sweaty hair with a baseball cap, turning it around backwards so I could see.

Bella's reply came back instantly: _No Tanya and Kate to save you this time, married man. ;)_

I grinned and answered her back. _You already saved me, angel._

_Love you. Call when you're finished. And STOP spelling dirty words on our game!_

I chuckled to myself, my head falling back to the sofa. It wasn't that the words themselves were dirty; it was that I'd elaborated on each one once I played it. Seemingly innocuous words would become taunts. I played the word "knee," typing in the chat box just how delicious the back my wife's knee was and that I planned to make up for missing it the last few weeks once I was home.

Mike dragged a chair over close to me. "So…what's with this chick?"

Shaking my head, I sighed, sipping my tea before clearing my throat. "Just…keep to the band and the music. She'll try for personal stuff…and some of it's fine. Just don't let her drag you into gossip-rag shit."

"The last time she interviewed _Masen_," Emmett started with a chuckle, "he skirted all around the rehab shit. He flirted to get it done, only to use Tanya and Kate as groupies to shoo her off. This time she's got to talk to all of you, so…I don't think you'll have a problem. She's okay, just…a little smitten."

I snorted into my mug but shook my head. "I'm too damned tired to flirt."

"And too damned married," Jacob jabbed, grinning when I threw the towel at him.

There was a knock at the door, and Emmett cracked it open to let in Rose and Jessica. She was exactly the same as the last time I'd seen her. She was dressed comfortably but casually professional. Her press pass was around her neck, and in her hand was Laurent's camera.

"Jessica, you know the band… Alec, Jasper, Masen, Jacob, and the newest member, Mike," Rose introduced, going around the small semicircle we were all in.

"Mike, it's good to meet you finally. You're doing well," she told him, shaking his hand, and he thanked her softly. She smiled, gazing over every last one of us. "I know you guys are tired after the show. Just…give me a few minutes, and I'll get out of your hair."

My eyebrows shot up a little. She wasn't the same flirty thing as the last time, which in all honesty was a relief. However, her eyes betrayed her as she scoped out my bare chest. She held up the camera and snagged a shot of all of us, some individual shots, and then thanked us.

Jasper sat forward as she took a seat across from all of us. "You'll have to forgive Masen. His voice is a little worn out, but we'll answer as best we can."

She smiled my way but nodded, pulling out her list of questions and her micro recorder. "Fair enough." She looked over at us. "Guys, this interview is for _next month's_ issue. Which means…after your last show in Seattle. I just want to clarify a few rumors."

"Jessica," I warned her, my voice thick. "Music…that's it. We've had this conversation before."

"No, I get that. The rumors I'm dealing with have to do with Volturi Records."

"Ah," Jasper sighed, nodding, but he glanced at Rose to see what she wanted us to do or say. When Rose nodded once, he looked to Jessica. "Radiant Eclipse's contract with Volturi Records is over at the end of this tour."

"And you won't be re-signing?"

"No," all five of us stated at the same time.

She laughed and nodded. "Okay… And would that have anything to do with the arrest and incarceration of James Allen?"

"No," I answered honestly. "It was a band decision that we'd made prior to even leaving on tour."

"And the forced retirement of Aro Volturi?"

I smiled ruefully at her. "You'll have to ask the record company."

"C'mon, Masen," she urged, her shoulders sagging. "Something happened at Charlie's Pub in Seattle… Not only was James Allen arrested, but they took Aro in on suspicion. Your now…_wife_ was involved."

"And you can't tell me that those criminal charges aren't public, Jessica," I countered. "Gimme a break, honey. You're not stupid, so stop playing it here."

She grinned. "Fine… So was that revenge for not re-signing with Aro?"

We went quiet. All of us.

Rose stepped forward. "Jessica, we can't discuss that with you. I told you that before you came in here. Nothing about that investigation is up for discussion…especially in print."

Jessica reached down and clicked off the micro recorder. "He really fucked up, didn't he?"

I laughed, sipping my tea. "In a blaze of fucking glory, Jess. Please move on."

She smirked, turned her recorder back on, and started to focus on the band. She stuck to questions about how the tour had gone, pointed out we'd had record-breaking sales, asked about our win at the VMAs, and stayed pretty professional the rest of the time…until the end.

"Okay, guys. What's next – for each of you personally, for the band as a whole?" When none of us answered right away, she sighed with a smile. "C'mon, guys… Alec, you've got a new baby… Jacob, your dad, how's he doing? Masen…you're married… I saw those pictures. Some say it wasn't real…"

There it was. I was waiting for it.

"Oh, it was real," I rasped, clearing my throat again before taking a sip of my tea. "It was very real." I held up my hand, wriggling my inked ring finger with a smirk, mentally noting her slight look of disappointment when she set eyes on it. "What's next is a break after this tour. We've been on the road now for almost a solid six months. We'll be taking time off to rest, be with our _wives_ and families, and then the future for Radiant Eclipse is wide open."

I stood up because I was done. I was tired, my throat was a little better after Tanya's tea but still sore, and I wanted a shower and a long talk with Bella before I truly rested my voice for the Seattle show. I was only a few days from seeing her, and time seemed to be ticking slower than ever. I rolled my neck to loosen up but looked back at Jessica when she turned to me.

"Masen, your fans just want to know… That's all."

Smiling her way, I nodded, tugging off my hat to rake my fingers through my sweaty hair and then put it back on. "What do they want to know, Jessica?"

"They only want to know if their favorite band will still be around. They want to know if they have something to look forward to or if this is the last tour."

"And?" I urged her, raising an eyebrow at her.

"And…" She blushed a little. "They want to know why Masen – one of the world's most eligible bachelors, one of _People's Most Beautiful People_, and self-professed party animal – finally settled down…and why so suddenly?"

Jasper snorted, folding his arms across his chest and shaking his head. Rose sighed with impatience, and my brother rolled his eyes. I studied her face, and I supposed that was the big question of the year. She wouldn't be the only one who wanted to know, that was for fucking sure.

Bracing my hands on the back of a chair next to hers, I lowered my head and looked her in the eye. "Radiant Eclipse isn't going anywhere. We plan to be around a long time. How we do that is yet to be seen, but our fans are the best out there. As for me… You should know by now that not everything you see is the truth; not everything is as it seems. What seems sudden to you was almost a year for me. What I do in my personal life isn't something I like to advertise, but I met, got to know, and fell in love with an amazing woman. Despite what people may think, there's nothing secretive about it, nor is it covering up anything. There's no evil plotting or planning. There's just my life, my _personal_ life." I stood up straight, maintaining eye contact with her. "Sometimes people outgrow the reputations they've been…_assigned_, Jess. Sometimes, in order to deal with all of this—" I waved a hand around "—people have to don a mask, they have to play a part, and not only am I personally done doing that, but the band is, as well. We'll sink or swim, but we'll do it on our own terms."

"Can I quote you on that?" she asked in a whisper.

Chuckling, I shrugged, grabbing my hoodie and tugging it on. "Yeah…by all means."

**~oOo~**

"Here, Edward," Alice said, handing me a couple of hangers laden with clothes. "How's the voice?"

Chuckling at her, I nodded. "I'm okay, Alice."

She smiled back, because my voice at the end of the Portland show had worried everyone, but I'd rested it the whole time we were driving through Oregon. It was good as new, or as close to it as I could be.

"Just one more show, right?" I asked her.

"Right!" she said exuberantly. "Where's Bella?"

"She'll be here."

I took the clothes from Alice and stepped inside the changing room to get dressed. From the looks of it, we were going with a touch of badass tonight. Chuckling at all black – black jeans, black sleeveless hoodie, and a black Fender T-shirt for underneath it – I put it all on, finally pulling on my Docs. The main dressing room was its usual quiet. The guys were in various states of dress. Jacob was on the phone with Leah, but only because his dad was going to attend this show. Carrie was sitting with Alec in the corner, both curled around baby Tia, who got cuter and cuter every damn time I saw her. Mike was shirtless, drumsticks in hand, using the rubber bottom of his sneaker to practice drum riffs and rolls. I didn't see Jasper, but he could've been getting dressed in the shower room.

Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly and pulled out my phone. No message from Bella just yet, so I shoved my earbuds in and stepped out into the corridor. Emmett leaned casually at the end of the hallway with Tony across from him.

We'd had no choice but to come straight to the arena. As much as I wanted to go home, we'd been delayed pulling into Seattle. The tour bus had blown a tire just before the Washington state line. The thought made me snort to myself at how frustrating that had been as I let the music wash over me, lull me into the mood I needed to get to in order to do this last show.

Heavy beats, heavier guitar riffs, and screaming vocals filled my head as I paced quietly in the hall. Viper's Venom was on the stage, and we were next. It was the final show of the tour, not to mention the hometown crowd. It was the final show under Volturi Records. It was the last show where I felt my soul belonged to someone else. We'd paid our dues, we'd done the time, and we'd come out on the very fucking top. It wasn't like we'd floundered. Hell, no. We'd blown it out of the water. And I had faith in my band, in Harry and Demetri, and I damn sure had faith in my girl that this next step into our future with Chainsaw Records would be the best yet. Jasper and I were already working on some fucking awesome new songs.

I shook my arms, rolling my head on my neck as I tried to calm my nerves. I had a feeling Caius would be attending, though he'd most likely stay away from us. He'd been pretty decent as our rep. I had to give him that much credit. He'd only given us the necessary interviews, the needed photo shoots along the way, but he'd kept his nose out of personal shit. He let the band market itself, rather than using some trumped-up gossip. Without Aro around, the tour had gone smoothly, albeit overly long. But what was booked stayed booked. There wasn't much we could do about it, even after his removal.

The song changed on my iPod, and I spun to walk the other way, coming to a standstill at the sight before me, a smile spreading slowly over my face as I plucked the earbuds from my ears.

"Angel…" I whispered, and my girl rushed down the hall into my arms. Wrapping my arms all the way around her, I lifted her up so that the toes of her sneakers barely scraped the linoleum of the corridor. "Fuck, baby, I missed you," I breathed into her neck, inhaling deeply the smell of her.

"Me, too," she sighed, and we stayed buried in our own little cocoon for a few moments. "Edward," she said, pulling back and cupping my face. Her face was so damned happy. "Guess what!"

Grinning at her, I shook my head and shrugged a shoulder, but I damn well wasn't letting her go right at that moment. "What?"

"You, Mr. Cullen, are all moved in," she whispered conspiratorially.

"All of it?" I asked in a laugh, kissing her when she nodded. "Damn, baby," I hummed against her lips. "You weren't fucking kidding, were you?"

"Hell, no. I wanted you to be able to just go…_home_." Her forehead thumped to mine. "I even drove your car tonight."

"Mmm, my angel's in a damn hurry," I crooned, nuzzling her nose with mine. "Feeling selfish?"

"Oh, Edward…you have no idea…"

I chuckled evilly, about to say something about selfish and home and messy beds, but she put her fingers to my lips.

"Watch it, Cullen," she warned. "I have a surprise for you."

She wriggled to get down, and I set her on her feet, but she turned to point to the end of the hallway. Standing there were my parents, together. They were holding hands, looking happier and healthier than they seemed to have been at my wedding. They looked pretty damn comfortable, actually, dressed all casual and shit for my show.

Emmett was a grinning fool behind them, and I chuckled, walking down to them and hugging them both.

"You guys are staying?" I asked stupidly.

"Of course!" Mom said with a smile as she cupped my face. "We just wanted to see you before we took our seats."

I gave Emmett a crooked smile. "Guess I gotta clean shit up a bit."

"For more than us, son," my dad said with a laugh, stepping back to reveal someone I hadn't seen in over a year.

"Bree," I whispered, a grin spreading over my face at the little girl I'd watched being toted away in an ambulance the night of my dad's wreck.

"Masen!" she squealed, rushing to me.

I knelt down to hug her, despite the fact that she had to be pushing twelve now and she'd grown like a damn weed. Her dark hair was still long, almost to her waist, and her sweet smile was healing to see, and not only for me but for my dad, as well.

"Look!" she said, holding her right arm up. "No more cast. But they let me keep it, 'cause you and Jasper signed it. I only have that scar left!"

Grinning, I looked at the tiny spot on her wrist she was pointing to, where they'd had to put a pin in her arm to help the bones mend. I picked up her hand and kissed her small scar.

"Good!" I looked to Emmett and jerked a chin at him to go get Jasper. He was going to want to see her. "You've gotten taller!" I accused dramatically with narrowed eyes, and I chuckled when she blushed and nodded. "You gotta be drivin' the boys crazy," I teased her, grinning when scowled.

"No way! The boys in my class are dumb!" That made everyone around us chuckle, but she caught sight of Jasper behind me and was rushing to him. "Jasper!"

"Kiddo! How'ya been, darlin'?" he sang to her, picking her up in a big hug.

I wasn't sure what it was about little Bree, but Jasper and I felt the need to spoil her. Maybe it was my dad's wreck. Maybe it was the giant fucking cast she'd had to wear for months. Or maybe it was because, despite all the drama surrounding that wreck and the cast and what I'd claimed as my fault, Bree loved us unconditionally.

I stood up straight, kissing the side of Bella's head. "Now I _really_ have to clean shit up," I whispered to her, which made her chuckle. I turned to look at my wife. "This is it. Last show. End of the tour, angel."

She smiled, cupping my face. "I know. I'm… I'm so _proud_ of you, Edward," she whispered, nodding a little. "You've… Not everyone could've persevered through everything you did this last year, but…you did. And you did it amazingly well."

I was shaking my head the whole time she spoke softly. "Not without you, angel. I wouldn't have survived it."

"Maybe, though I don't think you give yourself enough credit, rock star," she allowed, grinning when I laughed softly. "We'll get out of your hair. I know you need a second or two before you go on. I'm sitting with your parents, Bree, and Jake's dad."

"Okay, baby. Just come on back when we're done."

She nodded, kissing my lips and whispering that she loved me. Bree hugged me one more time, kissing my cheek, and now she was burdened with a shit-ton of souvenirs – t-shirts, posters, drumsticks, and who knew what else.

I listened for a second to see where Viper's Venom was in their set. They had a song or two left, so I put my earbuds back in to shut everything out for just a moment. I cranked up the volume, losing myself in music. I shut out reality for a few. There was no worry about the last show. There was no worry about the media, the paparazzi, the mass opinions that didn't matter to me whatsoever. And there was no worry that as of the last note played tonight, Radiant Eclipse would be responsible for our own future.

None of it mattered, because none of it was impossible to overcome.

Up and down the hall I paced, practically with my eyes closed. On stage, I was Masen. When I left the arena tonight, I'd go back to Edward. Though, slowly, I was beginning to see what Bella had tried to tell me all along. I was both men. As Masen, I was bold and shameless, using him to entertain. As Edward, I was a son, a friend, a brother…and now, a husband. Masen was the shield that protected everything that Edward deemed important. Once tonight was over, nothing about that had to change. I could be both men. And I'd do it, knowing that my angel would be there through it all, because she loved us both.

My guitar appeared in front of me as I made one more pass. Smiling, I pulled my earbuds out, handing them and my iPod over to Tanya.

Marcus, who'd come out to the hall with her to give me the guitar, smiled back, and he was usually quiet, but he slapped my shoulder, saying, "It's been a good tour, Masen. Call me when you're ready for the next one."

"Wouldn't use anyone else to manage our tours, Marcus," I vowed, giving his shoulder a squeeze before taking my guitar from him and securing it across my shoulder.

Turning around, I faced my band. As usual, the crowd was ramped up in the arena. The whole building seemed to shake and breathe and rumble with every cheer and scream and chant. It caused chills to flicker down my arms, down my spine. It always did.

"Last one," I stated, holding my hand out flat, and my boys followed suit, slapping theirs on top of mine. "After this, it's all us. After this, we're on our own."

"After this," Jasper added with his lazy grin, "no one can fucking stop us!"

"That's what I'm sayin'," Jacob drawled.

"Let's do this!" we yelled, turning to follow Marcus down the halls to the stage.

The lights had gone down, and that skin-crawling, hyped-up feeling took over. Jake started bouncing on his toes. Mike rolled his head on his shoulders, shaking his arms to loosen them up. Alec was quiet as he shifted from one foot to the other, eyes closed. And Jasper gripped my neck in a rough hug.

"Hometown, Masen," he stated in my ear as the lights, lasers, and rumble grew to a fever pitch. "Last show of this hellacious fucking tour. Let's give 'em every-damn-thing."

I nodded, slapping his back and bouncing from one foot to the other. Mike, Jake, and Alec ran on stage when introduced. Jasper was next, and the crowd was insanely loud. It made me grin, it made me happy we'd ended the tour at home, and it made my skin itch with the desire to give them a good show, despite how I had to clean it up a bit. That last thought made me snort, but when my name was called, there was nothing like the sound that erupted out of the audience.

Rushing out to center stage, I soaked it in. All of it. Every scream, every chant of my name, and the rumble of the music that the boys started. But one chant started to take over the whole arena. Glancing down at the VIP section, I saw my family, Bree, and Jake's dad, but above all else, I saw my wife, my angel, my saving fucking grace. And she was chanting right along with them, a spark of love and happiness in her dark eyes.

_Welcome home. Welcome home. Welcome home._

Grinning at Jasper, who was laughing as he played opening riffs, I dragged my tongue along my bottom lip before leaning into the microphone.

"Seattle, Washington!" I screamed, forgetting all about my voice. They could have it all tonight. "Hell, yes, we're home!" I stated, meeting my wife's gaze as the place exploded in cheers. "I've never been happier to be someplace in all my damn life! You ready to rock?!" I asked, grinning as I backed away from the mic and placed my fingers on the guitar.

With one jump, the pyrotechnics blasted hot and bright, kicking off the last show of the tour, and it represented the beginning of a new life, where I'd go home with my wife, my angel. It represented freedom and love. And I couldn't wait to get started.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… There we have it. We've come full circle with Masen and Radiant Eclipse. Right back to Seattle where all this started. And so many changes up to this point. **

**And no, I haven't forgotten Aro… LOL I know you guys want revenge, but…it's best served cold, as they say. ;)**

****EPI NOTICE** All that's left for this story is the epilogue. The problem is…this sinus infection has truly kicked my ass. All I want in my spare time is sleep, so that leaves no time to write. I truly apologize. I am working on it, but it's a slow process with RL, work, and tissues shoved up my nose. So not cool, but damn… As soon as it's done, cleaned up, and pre-read, it's yours. Just…hang in there for me. Please.**

**It'll be the epi that I do all my thank yous, and all the pics and teases are on FB and Twitter. The playlist for **_**Man Behind the Mask**_** is still up and will stay up. The epi will post as soon as it's done, so until then… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	27. Epilogue - Ladies and Gentlemen

**A/N… This epilogue took way longer than I expected, as is this freaking sinus infection, which I'm beginning to think is allergy related. I won't keep you, and I'll see you at the bottom to address a few things.**

**I want to thank all of you for coming on this fun journey with me. Without further ado, I'll give you the last of Maskward… **

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 27 – Epilogue – Ladies and Gentlemen**

_Ladies and gentlemen please  
Would you bring your attention to me?  
For a feast for your eyes to see  
An explosion of catastrophe_

_Like nothing you've ever seen before_  
_Watch closely as I open this door_  
_Your jaws will be on the floor_  
_After this you'll be begging for more_

_Welcome to the show_  
_Please come inside_  
_Ladies and gentlemen_

_Do you want it?_  
_Do you need it?_  
_Let me hear it_  
_Ladies and gentlemen_

_Ladies and gentlemen good evening_  
_You've seen that seeing is believing_  
_Your ears and your eyes will be bleeding_  
_Please check to see if you're still breathing_

_Hold tight cause the show it not over_  
_If you will please move in closer_  
_Your about to be bowled over_  
_By the wonders you're about to behold here_

"_Ladies and Gentlemen" – Saliva_

**EDWARD**

Rubbing the towel over my head after pulling on a pair of jeans, I leaned back against the counter in the shower room. My ears were still ringing and my throat felt like I'd swallowed steel wool, but my soul felt…light. The last show under the Volturi Records contract was done.

I let that sink in for a moment while rubbing my face with the towel. Four years. Four long, tedious, yet successful years. For a split second, panic started to creep up my spine. My band was on their own. No more big record company to take the hit, no more knowledgeable producers, no more financial net to fall back on… It was all on our shoulders.

However, just as quickly as the panic descended, the anger of what Volturi Records had put us through over those four years started to grow. It bloomed, expanding so big that the panic was no longer there. Four years of pretending to be something I wasn't. Four years of jumping through needless, humiliating hoops. Four years of fighting to keep our music pure, untouched, un-fucked-with. And four years of that condescending, Aston Martin-driving, cheesy-ponytail-wearing, evil fucking bastard.

Aro.

He'd made us compromise ourselves, our beliefs, our vision of what Radiant Eclipse meant to us. We'd had to fight and scratch and push back to keep some things the way we wanted, but he always seemed to weasel something out of us. He always seemed to manipulate the situation in order to get his way.

That shit was over.

What caused me to brace my hands on the counter was the memory of my angel's tears. Her fears, her panic…all because that bastard thought he could still manipulate, still control, still spin a story in order to keep the money rolling in. He'd dared to touch her, not physically but emotionally. He'd dared to lie to me, to my band, that James was "just a studio drummer," when in reality, that motherfucker was his son. And they'd both come at me, at what was most precious to me in the entire fucking world… Had they succeeded, I'd be in prison because I would've killed them both.

All over fucking money.

Money. That was his passion. And that would be the key to Aro's undoing. He may have been "forced" into retirement, may have bought his way out of trouble, but Karma had a funny way of slapping the piss out of someone when they've dealt in bullshit for too long. My freedom from Volturi Records now gave me the option to maybe…just _maybe_ help Karma along a bit. It would take time and patience, but I could wait. I could watch for it. And I knew just who would help me.

My eyes drifted down to my braced hands on the counter, my inked left ring finger catching my attention. The smile on my face couldn't be stopped. I was home. I was done with the longest tour I'd ever done, and I'd come home…to my wife.

I heard the door click, and warm arms slipped around my waist from behind as lips pressed to my shoulder blade.

"Listen, lady… My wife is just outside," I hissed dramatically.

Bella cracked the fuck up, nipping at my inked treble clef with angel's wings. "Shut up, Edward."

Chuckling, I turned around in her arms, leaning back against the counter. She pressed a giggly kiss to my chest before meeting my eyes. I pulled her hand to my lips, loving on the inside of her wrist, that lower case E, and then I gave her ring finger the same love.

I dropped a kiss to her lips, smiling into it. "You're an amazing sight for sore eyes, angel."

She hummed, kissing me again, but she pulled back. "I've missed you."

"Me, too."

She frowned, turning to reach for my mug of tea. "Drink, baby. Your voice is pretty shattered."

Nodding, I did as I was told. Tanya had pretty much kept a constant batch of it at the ready since San Francisco. I downed what was in there before setting the mug back down.

"I'll be okay in a few days. Promise. I kinda went a little crazy out there tonight, but I always do at home shows."

She smiled and nodded. "It was good. Bree left about halfway through…told me to tell you goodbye."

Grinning, I raked a hand through my still damp hair. "Seeing her was…good. She's gotten so big!"

Bella chuckled. "She loves you. Loves Jasper, too, but…I think my brother may be her new favorite."

Laughing, I shrugged. "He's younger. Makes sense. We noticed he brought a few younger fans in."

Bella merely nodded but slowly slipped her arms back around me. "Oh, and your parents said they'd call us later this week."

I hummed that I'd heard her and pressed kisses to the top of her head, saying, "Angel, I'm ready to go home."

She nodded, pushing back enough that I could drop kisses to her lips. "Then let's get you home."

I popped her sweet ass in those tight jeans, grinning when it made her squeak, and then reached for my shirt. Snatching up my leather jacket, I slung it over my shoulder, wrapping my free arm around Bella. We stepped out into the main dressing room to see everyone just about ready to go. Jasper and I made plans to get together in the next few weeks, as did Bella and Mike. That whole thing just turned into a giant invitation for a big party, which would most likely end up being at my brother's house.

The backstage area was busier than normal, simply because it was the last show. We said goodbye to Marcus, the road crew, and worked our way through the backstage-pass holders. Rose made sure to let Marcus know that our guitars and instruments needed to go to storage, but I knew they would eventually be moved to Chainsaw Records when the renovation was completely done.

Tony met me in the hall, handing Bella her keys. "I moved you to the back and put your things in there for you, Mase."

I grinned and thanked him, pulling him in for a rough one-armed hug. "Thanks, man. Enjoy the break, Tone. You've earned it."

He grinned, hugged Bella, and leaned in to her kiss to his cheek.

It seemed like forever since I'd sat behind the wheel of my own damn car, but as Bella and I got in, my whole being shivered a little with the fact that I was finally back. The stress, the tenseness in my shoulders all started to ebb away.

I carefully maneuvered out of the parking lot and out onto the street. After shifting gears, I pulled Bella's hand to my lips, enjoying the comfortable silence. My ears were still buzzing, my skin still prickling from the show, but there was nothing like being with Bella afterward. Nothing. I could come down easier in her presence, though the adrenaline still pumping through my system made me want her like nothing else before. The need to get home, however, was overriding all of it.

I wanted my wife in our place. _Ours_. While Masen wanted to pull the car over and take her in the backseat of my car, Edward wanted to carry his bride over the threshold of the apartment she'd worked so damned hard on while I was gone. I made a mental note to ask her who'd helped her, but it wasn't important at the moment. Pulling into the alleyway beside what used to be Charlie's Pub, I parked next to Bella's car. There was the bare minimum of paps across the street, though they started forward.

Shutting off the engine, I turned to face Bella, whose head was turned my way yet resting against the car seat.

"Are you quiet because of your voice? Or because of something else?" she asked.

Chuckling, I leaned over and kissed her lips. "Maybe I'm saving up in order to tell you dirty things once we're inside."

Her grin was ridiculously adorable. "Well, _that_ sounds like fun!" she teased but reached up to rake her fingers through my hair. "I want to show you what I've done…and not just the apartment."

My eyebrows shot up at that, and I studied her face. It seemed she needed this, so I nodded. "Okay, then show me, angel."

"I know you wanna get inside, but…"

I kissed her lips. "Show me, Bella."

Her eyes lit up, and she reached for the door of the car. Both of us ignored the catcalls of the paps on the sidewalk, and Bella pulled out her keys to open the back doorof what used to be her bar. There wasn't a drop of liquor in the place anymore. I gazed around at what used to be the kitchen or storage, and it was all gone. It was now a break room – a long table and folding chairs, a fridge and microwave, and a coffee maker.

She led me through the swinging door, and I stopped cold. I'd seen pictures throughout the whole process of renovation. I'd seen where part of the bar had been torn out and blocked off. I'd seen bar tables tossed out, carpet put down, and the walls covered with the noise-absorbing material. Hell, I'd even helped Jasper and Harry decide on some of the recording equipment, but looking at it now, I shook my head slowly.

"Whoa…" I whispered, eyeing the console of the production room and then the recording room through the window.

The original stage was still there, but it was incorporated into the whole soundproof room. Everything had been sanded and refinished, microphones were in various spots, and the old red curtain was completely gone. There were instruments already inside – piano, guitars, drums – but the place was large enough for all of Radiant Eclipse's equipment…and then some.

"That's fucking awesome," I breathed again, stepping through the door and onto the recording stage.

Bella's laugh was soft, sweet, and I felt her hand in mine, tugging me toward another door – a door that hadn't existed before. A wall had been added to separate the studio from the front door – essentially a reception desk – but what they'd done to it was nothing short of stunning. Bookcases lined one wall, and it was filled with awards and trophies, all from my own collection. Next to it was all of Chainsaw Charlie's achievements and a few of Harry's. There were some mounted posters of my band and Bella's father. The wall behind a sleek, modern desk was covered in gold and platinum records – Radiant Eclipse's and Charlie's on either side – and in the middle was a new sign.

_Chainsaw Records_

The sign was simple, black and white, the font resembling someone's handwriting, but it was perfect.

"I thought…maybe…your awards and stuff could stay in here. I mean, you're part owner to this, too," she rambled, and I could see she was nervous. "It wasn't that I didn't want those upstairs, I just… I thought… Although, there wasn't a lot of room once I started moving you."

I waited until she nervously met my gaze. "This is…_exactly_ how I fucking saw it, Bella. Not even bullshitting you on that."

She grinned, letting out a little giggle. "Yeah?"

"Oh, _fuck_ yeah…" I nodded, gazing around the reception room again. Everything smelled new – new carpet, new furniture, new paint. "If this place looks this good, I can't even fucking imagine what our home looks like."

Her breath caught on the word home, and her eyes watered a little. "Fuck, you're home… I need to let that sink in."

"Aw, angel," I said through a sympathetic chuckle. "C'mere," I whispered, pulling her to me and pressing my lips to the top of her head. "The very second I start driving you crazy, then it'll officially 'sink in.'"

Bella giggled into my chest, but her arms squeezed me closer. I held her close, swaying her a little as my mind still reeled with how gorgeous this studio had turned out. I could see us blowing the roof off this place, writing, creating, and succeeding.

Pressing a kiss to her head, I dragged my lips down to her ear. "Home?"

"Yeah," she said, nodding and pushing back a little, and I kissed her lips.

"Yeah," I agreed and then guided her back through the place to the alleyway door.

She set the alarm and locked the door, then helped me unload my bags from the car, opting to carry the guitar.

For some strange reason, my heart was hammering in my chest, not unlike the night we'd first had sex. I felt unsure and nervous, like I was standing on the edge of a cliff about to jump off, because really, this whole married thing was about to get really just…_real_. It was one thing being on the road, but it was another living, sleeping, eating together all the time, all under the same roof.

We got to the landing in front of her door, and she set the guitar down to unlock the deadbolt.

"Angel, wait…" I called softly, setting my hand on her shoulder. "Just…don't move, okay?"

She looked at me like I was crazy, but I hurriedly moved the guitar inside the door, leaning it up against the kitchen wall. I tossed my bags into the kitchen, only to reach for my girl. Swooping her up into my arms, I grinned at her squeak of surprise.

"Humor me, angel."

Her arms immediately wrapped around my neck, and her face was adorably amused as she giggled at me. "Your face is so red, Edward…"

"Shut up, Bella," I said with a laugh. "I just…give me some traditions, okay?"

What I loved was that nothing changed about us. No amount of distance or time apart could stop that silly, flirty shit that had been there since I'd knocked the poor thing over that fateful night as I ran from the media. It all stayed the same. And as I kicked the door closed behind us, I gazed down at her and just _knew_ it would always be that way.

I could hardly tear my eyes away from the beautiful thing in my arms, but she made me. She pressed fingers to my chin to force my gaze to the apartment. My eyes widened at what she'd accomplished. It was nothing short of stunning.

She'd blended us together in utter perfection – some of my furniture, some of hers, not to mention a few new things here and there. She'd used bookcases to separate different portions of the large open space, giving it a feel of actual rooms. My treadmill, books, and music were all in the far corner, situated in the living room. The bedroom was where she'd always had it, but it seemed blocked off a bit with dividers and, again, bookcases. Gone were the girly colors she'd had, and in their place were much more neutral ones. But the best was that she'd taken my bed stuff from upstairs and put it on her bed.

"Sweet Jesus," I breathed, shaking my head as I just took it all in. "It's like you put the two of us into a blender."

She giggled, kissing my cheek. "You change anything you don't like. The only thing I couldn't get down here was dad's old piano."

"Who… Who helped you?" I finally asked her, keeping her in my arms as I wandered around a bit.

"Tori and your mom. Most of the stuff we could just drag down here ourselves. The big stuff was Garrett and your dad. Demetri and Harry helped a little." She nuzzled my cheek with soft kisses. "As Tanya would say…all your shit's still here." She pointed around. "Jeans, T-shirts, sheet music."

I couldn't stop the laugh that erupted out of me. I walked her to the bed, setting her down in the middle of it, only to brace myself above her. She was beautiful and happy, with her dark hair spread out around her on my comforter. She pushed at my leather jacket until I shrugged out of it and let it drop off the side of the bed. Her light touch ghosted up the ink on my arms, following every swirl of color.

"I don't care about my shit, Bella. All I care about is right here," I whispered, my brow wrinkling at just how true that was. We were still completely dressed, but I brushed her hair from her face as I made no move to change that. "Are you ready for this, angel?" I asked, shaking my head at how dark her eyes became. "I don't mean this honeymoon that I still owe you…us. I mean this…" I gestured between us and then around the apartment that looked fan-fucking-tastic.

"You're worried?" she countered, reaching up to place her hands on either side of my face.

Chuckling softly, I kissed her. "Not worried, just… It's new now. Different. Everything's about to change. I'm…I'm home. We're married. This shit's the real shit. I just…"

"We'll figure it out, Edward," she stated, bringing my face closer so she could kiss me again. "We always do. It _is_ new and different and about to get very real. I, for one, am very happy we've come this far."

Smirking down at her, I let my forehead drop to hers. "That sounds familiar," I teased her, because I'd said those very words when she'd decided to close Charlie's Pub.

Her giggle was soft and very sexy. "Yes, well…the man who said them… He's pretty awesome, and he was right. We've come a long way. And I've waited a long damn time for this…right here."

Grinning, I couldn't help but shift over her. My hands toyed with her jacket, and she sat up enough to let me remove it.

"So…let me get this straight," I said in a falsely serious tone as my hands couldn't stop from touching – her arms, her fingers, down her stomach – as I bent her leg up a little to untie her sneaker. I did the same to the other one, raising an eyebrow at her as those sneakers thumped to the floor. "No clothes, ordering in, and essentially being… What'd you call us?"

"Slugs!" she erupted with adorable laughter as I pushed at her shirt in order to tease her bellybutton piercing with my tongue, my teeth. Diamonds looked fucking phenomenal on my girl. "I'm glad you think so, Edward, since you put them on me."

Grinning at my lack of verbal filter, I nipped at her skin. "I did, didn't I?"

"Y-Yes…" she sputtered as my fingers glided across skin and ink, pushing at her shirt until she had to lift up to let me remove it.

Not letting me get the advantage, Bella reached for my own shirt, and then it was messy kisses and clothes being tossed off the bed and my Docs thumping to the floor. When my angel was bare and beneath me, I couldn't help but love on those sexy-ass piercings.

"Hello, ladies," I crooned, just to hear Bella snort into soft laughter as I swirled my tongue around each one. "Brace yourself, girls. I'm home."

"Mmm," Bella hummed, pulling me to her. "Yeah, you are…"

I wanted to take my time, love every inch of her. I'd missed the hell out of my wife since she'd gotten on that plane in San Francisco. I wanted to revel in each part of her, unwrap her like a gift, much like I'd done the first time we'd made love. But it didn't happen that way.

Things spiraled out of control. We were lost to deep, needy kisses, moaning at touches and gripping hands. It was as if our bodies knew, _just fucking knew_ that this was the beginning of everything – our new lives, our still-new marriage, our new business endeavor.

Our new _normal_.

My tongue tasted ink, diamonds, and then pure Bella from the spot between her legs that I could never get enough of, but once she was calling my name – my real fucking name – I slipped up her body in order watch that gorgeous face of hers when I finally slid deep inside her.

She held me close, our eyes locked, and just before I started to move, I couldn't help but whisper, "I want it all, angel. This…always. Us."

Bella smiled, lifting her head a little to kiss me. "Me, too. And I can't wait to figure it out."

**~oOo~**

_**Four months later…**_

"Angel, I don't see it," I muttered into the phone as I pushed shit around in the kitchen drawer. I flinched at the pouring rain that spattered hard against the windows. Well, it was snow _trying _to be rain, when really it was just a fucking mess outside.

"Well, try my desk…"

"Okay." I slammed the drawer in the kitchen and went to her desk. I yanked open the middle drawer. "Ah! Got it," I exclaimed in victory, holding up the thumb drive she'd asked for. "Need anything else while I'm up here, Bella?"

"No, baby, that's it. We're about to finish up this Facebook page for Chainsaw Records. I wanted you to see it before we went live," she explained.

We'd decided that once Radiant Eclipse started to work in the studio, we were going to let social media be our biggest ally. Bella was going to run the page, using real pictures, small video clips, and she'd post interviews and shit. Rose loved the idea, stating that we could essentially control everything said and done about us, the band, and the new album we were taking our time putting together.

We'd had an amazing break over the holidays. My voice was rested, Jasper and I had worked on new music, and we'd moved all of Radiant Eclipse's equipment into the studio. We were all relaxed, but we were all taking our time getting back to work. Bella and I had split our holidays with Renee and Phil and my own parents, the latter of whom were doing really well. At the moment, Jacob was with his dad and Leah. They'd taken him to a small town outside of Seattle to not only go fishing but to see some of their relatives. Alec and Carrie, the proud parents, had taken small trips over the holidays to show Tia off to Carrie's parent in Idaho and Alec's mother in Port Angeles. The only ones fucking around in the studio today were Jasper, Mike, and myself.

"Cool. Headin' back down," I said, tugging open the door to our apartment, but I just about fell off the landing when something scurried across the mat. "Aw, shit!" I gasped, trying like hell to hold onto my phone and catch myself from falling and busting my ass.

"What's wrong?"

"I almost…"

My voice trailed off as I caught sight of what had skittered across the welcome mat at the front door. My heart kind of broke at the sight. Curled up in the corner of the landing as tight it could get itself was a soaking wet, shivering kitten. It was orange striped with white paws…at least I was guessing they were white, because the little guy was covered in mud and rain.

"Edward?" Bella called over the line.

"Aw, hell…" I sighed, shaking my head. "Angel…are you allergic to anything?"

Her laugh made me smile, but her answer was no.

"Good," I whispered softly, reaching out for the tiny thing. "Be down there in a second."

I ended the call, pocketing my phone, and then scooped up the kitten. He started to fight me, despite the fact that he could fit into the palm of my hand.

"Easy, easy, tough guy," I said through a chuckle. "I'm just trying to help you, buddy!"

His tiny body gave a shiver that, if he were a human, I could imagine would've rattled teeth. His bluish-green eyes blinked up at me as he completely gave up the fight. I gave him a brief onceover, noting he was indeed a _he_. Aside from being really young, he seemed okay, just a little skinny, not to mention freezing.

"Oh, boy," I sighed. "Let's get you warm, okay?"

Tucking him into the front of my leather jacket, I then zipped it up so he could get dry and warm, not giving a damn about my sweatshirt and his muddy paws. Holding him close and tugging up my hood, I rumbled back down the stairs and into the back door of the studio.

Harry was working with Mike and Jasper in the recording room while my brother was kicked back listening in, but Bella's and Rose's laughter could be heard from the far back office – the office that Bella hadn't changed. In fact, that fuck-awesome desk of hers was still there. We'd now christened that bad boy more than that one time after filming the video at Charlie's Pub. I loved that fucking desk.

I leaned in the doorway, still keeping the kitten close to my chest, though he was hidden. Rose, Bella, and Tori were all looking at the same laptop, smiling and laughing at whatever they were seeing. I pushed my hood back down as Bella glanced up from the computer. I tossed the thumb drive her way, and she caught it deftly.

"Damn, it's raining that bad?"

I nodded, swallowing nervously, because suddenly I wanted to keep my little wet friend. "Angel…I…"

All three ladies were now staring at me.

"You okay?" Rose asked, her eyes taking in my rain-soaked clothes. "Did you decide to just stand in the rain, brother-in-law?"

"No! I kinda…" I ran a hand through my hair, which had still managed to get wet, despite my hood. "Never mind."

Bella pointed to the screen. "You gotta see these pictures, Edward. Someone manipulated you in with Heidi, but it's _so bad_!"

The girls burst into giggles, but it made my little friend jump. His curiosity had to have gotten the better of him, because he popped his head out the top of my zipper. At least he'd stopped shivering.

"Come look…" Bella added but then stopped, the warmest of smiles spreading over her face. "Who's your friend?"

Laughing, I stroked the top of the little guy's head, sending him into a loud, rumbling purr. "Well, he just about killed me when I came out our apartment door. I think he was trying to get out of the rain. He's so young, angel…"

When I pulled him out of his warm spot, he argued with me, but that only sent the girls into soft coos of how cute he was. Bella got up and walked to me, holding her hands out.

"Oh, God, you're starving," she whispered to him, her nose wrinkling when the little man rubbed his face against hers. Her eyes locked with mine as he scrambled to get closer. When he found some sort of happy place in the crook of her neck just beneath her hair, she snorted. "Your face reads like a book, Edward." I stayed silent but smirked her way as her eyes never left my face. After a beat or two, she shook her head. "Fine, baby. What're we naming him?"

"Um, well…I…" I shrugged a shoulder, shaking my head, because I honestly had no idea, but my girl was wearing her dad's shirt. That same damn shirt I'd peeled off her the first time we'd made love, so the word, "Fender," came blurting out of my mouth unhindered, but I felt my face heat with the reason behind it.

The girls laughed, but Bella chuckled softly, running a hand down the kitten's back as she glanced down at her shirt, only to raise a deadly-sexy eyebrow at me. "Fender, it is."

Tori chuckled, shaking her head. "I'll go grab some food for him across the street. But you two are in charge of litter and stuff!"

Grinning, I nodded. She'd taken Bella's offer as the receptionist for Chainsaw Records, though Garrett had found another bartender job closer to his now fiancée, Maggie.

"Okay, fair enough," I told her as she got up from her seat, and I turned back to Bella. "You sure?"

"Let's see…" she said, but I could see her teasing expression. "He's pitiful, adorable, and practically caused you to bust your ass. Sounds familiar. Maybe we should name him _Masen_?"

Laughing, my head fell back. "Funny, Bella. No. Fender works fine."

She grinned up at me. "You're too cute, Edward. I swear. But we need to get to work. New family members or not. Tomorrow we'll take him to the vet, get him all checked out, okay?"

"Just don't let him name him Ozzy. He named his fish that, and I swear to God, the thing didn't last a month!" Rose said, grinning when I shot her a glare. "What?! It's true!"

Unfortunately, she was right. Shrugging as I hung up my jacket, I sat down at the computer, taking Tori's spot next to Bella. "Okay, angel…show me what we're doing."

Fender's happy purr was loud, which made us all smile at Bella as she pulled out a towel left over from the bar days. She buffed him gently, wiping ears, face, and paws as the little guy swatted at her. Keeping the small towel around him, she set him in her lap, and he proceeded to finish up the cleaning job himself.

"Pretty much the same thing she did to you," Rose stated sarcastically, pointing a finger my way.

Despite the fact that her statement was true, I flipped her off as Bella chuckled silently. Glaring Rose's way as she laughed her ass off, I shook my head. Fingers gently grabbed my face, forcing me to look at my wife.

"No stray will ever be as cute as you are, baby," she crooned my way, making me snort into a chuckle, but I kissed her lips. "Though, he comes damn close." She laughed, kissing me roughly before pointing to the screen. "Look…"

The picture on the computer was hideous. Someone was either high or fucking drunk when they'd decided to make it. It was of Heidi and me, but it so bad, no one would ever believe that shit. Never mind that my inked wedding band was clearly on my hand.

"Pfft…" I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "Fuck, I look cross-eyed!"

The girls laughed but got rid of the picture. However, it was Rose who explained what they'd been working on.

"Pay attention, doofus," Rose sighed, smirking my way, but she pointed toward the screen. "Instead of you and the guys actually creating Facebook pages or Twitter accounts, we thought it would be easier if we posted updates about the band members, tours, appearances, and the new album via Chainsaw Records. In order to keep it fair, we'll do the same for everyone that records here, but obviously, you guys will be the bigger name."

"This way," Bella added, but she paused, her fingers trailing over Fender's head. His eyes were closed like that shit was the best thing in the damn world, which I knew for a fact felt like heaven. "This way, it'll be me who controls what people know, whether it's personal or band business. I'm fully aware of what you guys like and don't like to be out there, so…we'll keep it under control with this. But…" She held up a finger. "It'll be a pretty amazing marketing tool. See?"

Looking over the screen as she scrolled down the page, I could see that there were links to buy our stuff – CDs, T-shirts, and eventually concert tickets. There were places for photos, videos, and future online chats with featured recording artists. Not to mention samples of our older stuff, which was linked to Volturi Records by legal necessity.

Thinking about it, I muttered, "This is what you meant, angel." I gazed over at her. "When we were on tour… You said that we should let the fans do the work, that we should cater to them. This…this is it, right?"

"Exactly," she said with a grin. "See, once this page goes live, Tori will spread it to your buddy, Donna. And in no time, Donna will have it around the globe. We'll have followers from everywhere. Her page is pretty damned popular, not to mention she runs it well." She tapped the screen. "Nothing goes on here that you guys don't want. No more drinking, partying, man-whore, paparazzi bullshit. You guys can communicate with your fans however you wish to do it. Tease them with new music, give them short video interviews, give them fun photo shoots…"

"Which we'll need to set up soon," Rose added. "But you guys control it. Bella will just maintain it."

"Yeah, I won't allow anything on here that you don't want."

Giving her a wry grin, I said, "I trust you, Bella. That's not an issue."

"I know, but I didn't want you to think that this would be like last time. I'm not '_marketing_' you, just running the page."

I laughed, and Rose joined me. "Uh, no, angel. Nothing could be like last time, short of hell itself." When Bella smiled, I cupped her chin, kissing her lips. "Do it," I whispered against them. "It's perfect. If anyone on this planet can protect us…_me_, it's you, baby."

"Excellent," Rose exclaimed, grinning and nodding. "Now, onto bigger things… I'm going to set up a photo shoot soon. Not yet, but soon. Probably once you've truly started to record. We'll all sit down to decide what kind of look you want for this album, even the next tour. Once I have a better idea of that, we can figure out if you want to shoot it here or L.A. or New York."

"Here," I groaned, waving the rest of her words away. "Here. We're independent, Rosie. Let's use independent people…local people."

"I agree, but I wasn't sure…" She picked up her phone. "One more thing. Milton. He's offered us his video-director services again, should you want him."

"Hell, yes."

"Yeah, thought so on that. I told him the same thing." Rose smirked and stood up from the desk. "Okay, let me know how it goes once you go live with the page. I'll have it linked to the website."

Bella nodded, focusing back on the screen, but her fingers continued to play with Fender. Rose left us, but then Tori came back, carrying two ginormous bags of stuff from the market down the street.

"Seriously?" I laughed at her.

"Shut up! So I lied, okay?!" She grinned, setting all the stuff down. "I got you everything – toys, litter boxes, litter, food and water bowls, and food. I figured he'd chill down here when you were working and then go home with you, so I got stuff for both places. And this… How _badass_ is this?!" She held up a small black collar, and I had to chuckle and take it from her. "Fender is a rock band kinda kitty! He's gonna need to dress the part."

Grinning, I turned the thing over in my hands. It was tiny, black, and leather, but it had small little spikes around it. It was, indeed, _badass_.

"Oh, fuck yeah…" I yanked off the tag and buckled it around Fender's little neck, making sure it wasn't too tight.

Tori poured him some food before leaving the office, and he was immediately ravenous when Bella set him on the desk. Watching the little man scarf down his food while in that collar was hilarious. He looked like a contradiction all the way around – tough but tiny.

Smiling Bella's way, I nodded. "Hell, yeah… He's star material."

"Edward," she huffed in a laugh, shaking her head at me. "If you're this proud over a kitten, I can't imagine you with a kid."

Shrugging, I pushed that feeling down, but she saw it all in the heat of my cheeks, and she grabbed me by the back of my neck, planting a toe-curling kiss to my lips. It was deep and possessive, sweet and heated. I wanted more. I wanted to shove everything off the desk and take her hard, just like the first time we'd done it in her office.

"When, Edward?" she whispered, pulling until my forehead thumped to hers. "When?"

"Fuck, angel… I don't know," I barely breathed aloud. "But when we do, I'm…_so in_."

She nodded, smiling a little. "Not yet. Maybe…next year?"

"Yeah?"

"This…" She sat up a bit, gesturing around. "This is stressful enough. And then you'll tour. I vote next year."

I nodded the entire time she was talking, like a fucking bobble-head doll, but it was true. "Okay. Next year."

Fender stepped to the edge of the desk, his purr loud and raspy, but his little mewling call made us smile at each other and turn to face him. He headbutted me, using the scruff of my unshaven face to scratch his own face, only to ram his little head into Bella's cheek. With that simple action, we were done. Fender was officially a Cullen.

**~oOo~**

_**One month later…**_

"Edward," I heard from somewhere deep and foggy. When I rolled over, burying my face farther into the pillows, a soft sigh and chuckle met my ears. "Edward… I know you were up late writing with Jasper, but…Jenks is downstairs asking for you."

Groaning, I managed to open one eye to look up at my wife. Hot damn, I was a lucky fucking bastard. Even in jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, she was hot, beautiful…deliciously sexy. She was the best thing to open my eyes to first thing in the morning…or afternoon, as it was in this case. My eyes felt like there was sandpaper lining my lids, and it seemed like I'd just fallen into bed. I'd been writing with Jasper downstairs in the studio until way late.

A small squeak, a shift on the bed beside me, and a light purr caused my eyes to drift to Fender, who had grown like a damn weed since I'd found him. He stretched out across Bella's side of the bed, eyeing her like it was too damn early. The little guy turned out to be a mellow dude, following me everywhere around the apartment and downstairs to the studio, but he loved to snuggle with Bella. However, right now, he looked at her with narrowed green eyes that seemed to dare her to disturb the sweet sleep we'd been enjoying.

Bella snort into a soft giggle. "Peas in a damn pod. C'mon, baby. Jenks needs to see you."

"Okay, okay…" I grunted as I succumbed to a long-needed stretch, but then I opened my arms for Bella, who grinned at me as she shook her head. "C'mere, angel…"

"Oh no," she sang through a laugh. "I know how that story ends, mister. You…all sleepy and naked and needy first thing when you wake up. Not a chance. 'Cause then I have to call down and tell everyone to go home."

A laugh barked out of me as I rubbed my face. "Fair enough."

It was slow going, but eventually I was up and dressed, sipping a cup of coffee Bella had handed me.

"Did he say what he wanted?" I mumbled around my cup.

"Just something about Volturi," she said, staring shrewdly my way. "Is he watching Aro for you?"

I nodded. "Yeah, and James, too, actually," I replied softly, turning toward the bed. "Fender, you comin' or what?"

"Meewp!" was all the reply I received, and he came running, tail up, eyes wide. The long, lean thing was smart as shit; I had to give him that much.

Bella chuckled at us again, shaking her head as she led us out of the apartment and down the stairs. Once we were in the studio, Fender darted off in search of Tori, who he loved to play with when she was working. Jenks was waiting with Harry in Bella's office.

"I'm sorry Bella had to wake you, Masen," Jenks greeted, but I waved it off, shaking his hand and giving Harry a nod. "If you hadn't asked for information, I would've come back later, but this is a timing situation."

I sat on the corner of Bella's desk, waiting to hear what he had to say.

"You wanted to know when James's release was drawing near… Well, soon, actually. Like this morning. Now, I took the liberty of keeping the orders of protection on this place and your wife. It was what you wanted, yes?"

"Oh, yeah. Neither of them should come any-fucking-where near her." I pointed to Bella, but my gaze stayed locked on Jenks. We knew James's release was coming up, so I didn't want to take any chances with any of it. Despite the fact that his lawyers got him out for good behavior and time served, James was unpredictable and dangerous, not to mention stupid, which made for a deadly combination.

"I wanted to ask if you wanted that extended to you."

"Pfft…hell no. I hope those assholes come at me. I'm home for a bit longer, so…if they're feeling froggy, then by all means let them jump."

Jenks grinned, shaking his head. "As your lawyer, I have to advise against—"

"I'm aware," I sighed, getting up to pace, and I raked a hand across my face. "I'm not making promises."

"Edward," Bella huffed. "They aren't worth you going to jail."

"It'll never happen," Jenks assured her but focused back on me. "It's also come to my attention that Aro might not be as…_retired_ as we may think."

My eyes narrowed on him. "Why?"

Harry sat forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "My friends over at Slammers have seen him in and out over there, watching new bands, new singers. He's recruiting again."

The grin that spread across my face felt evil, so I'm sure it looked it. "Aww…Aston Martin payment due soon?"

"Probably," Harry answered with a laugh. "Thing is… My friends wanted me to check out a new band. They know I've been working with a few musicians. They thought I'd be interested. That _Chainsaw Records_ would be interested." He leaned on the label name, raising an eyebrow at me. "Rock band. Young female lead singer. I hear she's pretty damn good, kid. But knowing what I'd warned them about Volturi, they thought I could intercept him. My friends say Slammers is packed on the nights she's there."

"Eternal Blackness," Bella surmised, and Harry nodded.

My head spun her way. "You know them, angel?"

She shook her head. "No, not really, but Mike was talking about them. He says she's young and really good." She smirked, rolling her eyes. "Apparently, she's very pretty…or 'hot' if you're talking to Mikey."

Grinning, I nodded. "Well, he _is_ single again."

"Mm, don't remind me. I liked Lauren, but I'm glad her true colors came shining through before he did something stupid."

Bella's eyes were narrowed at that, but I had to agree, if only for her brother's sake. His girl had started to see dollar signs…and other men when Mike wasn't around. He'd dropped her like a bad habit. I locked gazes with my angel, thanking whoever the hell I needed to thank for her. Being in the spotlight caused all sorts of nefarious shit, and people couldn't always be trusted. It sucked even worse when the heart was involved. But Bella was my safe haven, my calm in the storm, and my protection against all the bullshit in this world.

She smirked, like she could see what I was thinking, but then focused on Harry. "Should we see this band?"

"We can. They're at Slammers again tonight," he answered her.

"And if Aro is there?" Jenks countered, looking to me. "I know you feel…_unsatisfied_ when it comes to him, Masen. I just… I'm merely asking you to be careful. If his son is released, then it's possible they'll be together, though if I were James, I'd be pissed off as hell. His dad threw him to the wolves, so to speak. Aro pretty much let his son take all the blame for what happened that night with Bella," he explained, holding up his hand when I opened my mouth, "and I know that doesn't sit well with you, kiddo, but sometimes, you have to let things play out."

Jenks and I had come to an impasse when it came to Aro and James – though, more the former than the latter. James was just a dumb, angry guy, guided by a man who was a master of manipulation. James had gone to jail, lost his countersuit against Radiant Eclipse when we'd released him, and he'd be saddled a sexual predator for the rest of his life. He was paying for what he'd done to Bella. And he'd continue to pay for a long damn time…all because of his dad. Aro, on the other hand, had walked away from it unscathed. He'd been lit on fire in the media, but he'd apparently stayed low long enough that he felt like he could crawl out from whatever rock under which he resided.

Jenks wanted to bide his time, while I wanted retribution for daring to scare my Bella, for thinking they could touch something so fucking precious to me that I'd kill for her. Jenks and I had finally stopped arguing about it, because really, there wasn't much either of us could do. And I was pretty damn sure Jenks adored my wife, which made him just as protective. He merely tried to stick to the legal side of it all.

Fuck the legal shit; I wanted blood.

Jenks gave me a warning glare, and I nodded. "Yeah, I get it. Aro will screw himself eventually, but how many have to suffer until then?"

"I don't know, Masen. Honestly." He sighed, sitting back in his chair.

I looked to Harry. "You and Demetri feel like scoping this band out?"

"Umm, you're not going without me," Bella piped up, glaring my way as she muttered about Aro and tempers and young, pretty, blonde lead singers.

Grinning, I leaned over and kissed her temple. "Hush, my sweet angel. I'm pretty sure I've proven my tastes run along the brunette lines, and specifically _one_ brunette. And anyway, I just assumed you'd be going."

"Oh. Okay, then." She seemed placated for the moment but added, "And Demetri is out of town visiting his kids."

Harry nodded once, looking to me. "Tonight?"

I thought about it for a second and then nodded. "Yeah, tonight. If anything, we can scare Aro out of Slammers."

**~oOo~**

Slammers was packed when we finally pulled into the parking lot. Jasper, Harry, and Mike were meeting us there. Emmett and Rose opted to ride with Bella and me. My brother was coming out of pure curiosity but probably protection, too. Since Bella had created that Facebook page and my interview with _Music Mania Magazine _had come out, the media was quiet, and it helped that Heidi's people had finally shut the fuck up, too. It seemed to have taken several months, but my marriage to Bella had finally calmed the hell down. We were old news…for now. In fact, I hadn't seen much of anything in the last month or two, except for some actor who broke up with an actress and some football player arrested for beating another player over some shit. I tried not to pay any attention to any of that gossip madness.

Harry thought it would be best if we didn't tell anyone we were coming. We wanted to see this band without the pressure of it being in front of us.

Once inside, we settled down at a table that Harry had reserved for us. He'd already ordered a few pitchers of beer, and I poured a couple for Bella and myself.

The place was almost wall to wall people, and the stage was already set up for what looked to be a small band – a drum kit, couple of guitars, and a couple of microphones. Mike was next to me when they finally took the stage, and I heard his sigh, despite the cheers that rang out over the bar.

Smirking, I gazed over at him. "You crushin' on the singer, buddy?"

"Oh, fuck, she's hot… Look…" He pointed toward the stage, and my eyebrows shot up at the girl.

It wasn't that she wasn't pretty – she was truly hot – it was her youth that made me study her. She had to still be in her late teens, no more than twenty. Hell, I wasn't even sure she was old enough to drink. She wasn't very tall, but she was thin, her blonde hair long with streaks of black in it underneath, and her eyes were made up dark and smoky. She had an edge to her look, as did the boys joining her, but it was natural, easy. However, the sound that burst out of them was fan-fucking-tastic. A heavy sound mixed with an acoustic touch. Their timing was good and their lyrics were smart, but having a female lead singer made them unique, different.

Her voice was strong, trained, but it was harsh, raspy, and edgy, too. She played an acoustic guitar, working the men at the front of the stage, but her band was damn talented. With a push in the right direction, the song she was singing could easily be on the radio.

Harry seemed to be completely enamored with her. Chuckling, I bent to Bella's ear. "What do you think, angel?"

"I think she's damn good," she replied, shrugging at me, only to kiss my jaw. "But I'm not the musical genius, Edward."

I watched the band start a new song, something softer but not a ballad. Linking my fingers with Bella's, I kissed the ink on the inside of her wrist and then her ring finger.

Shaking my head at that, I said, "She's good. The band is good – really fucking good. She'd be easy to promote. Harry's in love, I think."

"She's beautiful," Bella stated, and I spun to read her face with narrowed eyes, thinking she was testing me again, because she owned my ass. Her grin was cute as hell. "You're allowed to say she's hot, Edward," my girl said through a laugh, pointing toward the stage. "I know you love me, married me. You're not blind."

I nodded and shrugged a shoulder at the same time. I saw pretty, but I saw young, and I saw the music in her more. "You think that's all anyone will see?" I asked her, kissing her lips softly.

"No, no… I'm saying that could work for her or against her. Being a guy in this business is easier than being a woman, unfortunately. Rumors are uglier, suspicions are foul, and women have to be tough but girly and shit. Too tough and you're labeled a bitch. She's young, too, so…"

"Tough chicks are hot, baby," I crooned in her ear, giving the lobe a teasing nip. "That's why I married you." I sucked at the sweet spot behind her ear, grinning when she laughed.

Bella chuckled when she pulled back to look at my face, but it faltered, her eyes widening at something off to my left. When I turned to look, I gritted my teeth in hatred of the cheesy ponytail I'd recognize anywhere. Hell, if the bastard wasn't recruiting again. I'd know that look anywhere. He saw dollar signs all over that poor girl on the stage, and suddenly I felt the need to step in his path, if only to protect the band on that stage. I knew him; he'd rip her away from the band and let them fall by the wayside, while only pushing her. And he'd do it all while filling her head with bullshit.

Aro had to have felt my stare, because he turned his head, locking gazes with me, and I draped a heavy arm around Bella, smirking his way, because he wasn't allowed within a hundred feet of her. And at this point, I didn't give a rat's ass who had gotten there first.

I tapped Harry's shoulder and then Jasper's and Emmett's, jerking my chin to where Aro was sitting. And he was alone – no James, no Caius.

Rose eyed him shrewdly, her eyes narrowing, only to turn back to us. "I want her," she stated firmly, pointing to the stage. "I want that band. And I want them before that devil sinks his claws in her."

Harry chuckled, took a long drink of beer, and stood up. "Let me find out if we can see them after their set." He walked away to the bar, grinning and shaking hands with the guy behind the bar.

"That fucker isn't supposed to be within a hundred feet of you, B," Mike sneered, glancing over his shoulder and then back to his sister.

Bella shrugged, pointing to all of us at the table. "I think I'm safe, Mikey."

Laughing along with my brother and Rose, I kissed her lips. "That's my girl."

Harry joined us back at the table. "It's a go. Liam's gonna take us back there when the set is done."

The rest of the show was just as good. A few songs could use some work, but their covers were fantastic. They even did a Radiant Eclipse song, which made us proud, and it sounded pretty damn good with a female voice.

Just before the last song, I noticed Aro was gone. I raked my gaze all over the damn bar but couldn't find him. My hope was that he'd wised up and left, considering he could be arrested for being in the same place as Bella. The place started to empty when the show was over, and Harry's friend, Liam, came to the table to lead us to the back.

And that's where we found Aro. That weasel was already cornering the poor lead singer in the back hallway, where it looked like she was coming out of the restroom.

"You can't imagine the things you can do, the places you'll go…" he was saying when we all entered the hallway from the bar, all while holding up his business card. His eyes widened, and he stepped back from her.

"Chelsea, love, this is…"

"Masen," the girl gasped, only to catch sight of Jasper and Mike. "Jasper…Mike… You're…"

"It's good to meet you," I stated, holding out my hand. "You guys are really good. Impressive, actually."

"I believe I was here first, Masen," Aro snapped.

Chelsea eyed him with a pinched look of disdain. She was repulsed by him. "I wouldn't sign with Volturi if you made me a queen. Your reputation precedes you, Aro."

Grinning, I looked to Harry and then Jasper, who were beyond amused. The kid was pretty _and_ smart, not to mention brave. It would serve her well. It was already serving her well, because she had a hell of a following here in town.

Liam stepped forward. "They'd like to speak with you and the boys, Chelsea. In private," he tacked on the last thing, raising an eyebrow at Aro. "And if this man is bothering you, I can have Max escort him out."

I looked at Aro, seeing the man who'd controlled my life for so damn long. I saw the man who'd dared to threaten Bella.

"Aro, why don't I see you to the car? We should chat. You guys go on in with Chelsea."

"E… Masen…" Bella faltered on my real name, most likely due to the people around us we didn't know. "Don't…"

"I have nothing to say to you, Masen," Aro snapped.

"Oh, but I have plenty to say to you, motherfucker," I said with a grin. "We either have this conversation outside, Aro, or I call the cops because you're violating the order of protection on my wife. Pick."

The hallway was deadly silent as we waited for his answer. When he nodded, Liam gripped my shoulder. "No cameras out the back door, Masen. Just sayin'," he stated, wearing a small smile.

Aro wasn't given much longer to debate. Emmett's hand landed heavily on the back of his neck, guiding him by us and down to the back door. I followed behind, but Bella's hand gripped mine, pulling me to a stop.

"Baby, don't!" she hissed, glancing Aro's way as Emmett kept him in the doorway. "He's—"

"It's just a talk, angel," I reasoned, but I knew it was a lie when it left my lips. "Okay, maybe more than that, but… He needs to know to stay away from you, from us. I won't… You're my wife, baby…"

Aro scoffed at the word _wife_, and Bella's eyes narrowed dangerously at him. It was right there, right at that moment, when we both heard the word _whore_ leave his lips in a belligerent hiss that she backed away. Emmett's large hand squeezed the back of his neck, making him buckle just a bit, but my reaction came without thought. I was out the door with my own hand around his neck, slamming him up against the rough brick of the building.

"Say it again. Call her that again. I fucking dare you." I squeezed my hand harder, sneering when he _couldn't_ answer. "You call my wife a whore one more time… Do it. Do it, and I'll bash your skull against this wall." I pulled him back, only to slam him into the wall again, but I let him go. Interestingly enough, he stayed on his feet. "Un-fucking-believable!" I scoffed, shaking my head as I raked a hand through my hair.

I paced back and forth in front of him, feeling my brother's presence, but I realized he'd come with me to watch my back from witnesses, not Aro himself. He was leaning against the wall, his eyes scanning the back area of the bar.

Coming to a stop back in front of Aro, I pointed a finger in his face. "I promised your brother that if you ever came anywhere near me or my band or Bella again, I'd put you in the hospital. I was told you were retired."

"You ungrateful piece of shit… I _made _you." He tapped the center of his chest but flinched when not only I stepped forward, but Emmett did, too. "I made you a fucking household name, you bastard."

"No, you made me something I wasn't. My music…my band's music…made us a household name. And we wouldn't have gotten here had we listened to you. Every fucking chance, you pushed your shit on us. Four years of lies and scratching and clawing our way through each album just to keep it ours. Four years of bullshit. And now…it's over."

Aro shifted, and I stopped him from moving with a firm hand to the middle of his chest. He grunted when his back met the unforgiving brick behind him.

"I did it all. I finished everything we signed on that contract, but there wasn't a fucking ice cube's chance in hell I'd re-sign with you. Not after what you and James did. I should kill you for even coming anywhere near her." My lip curled in hatred. "And I realize that beneath that fuck-awful ponytail of yours, it all made some sort of twisted sense." I tapped the middle of his forehead with two fingers once, twice, three times. "Even your own brother was disgusted by you. Here's what's going to happen, Aro. Every bar, club, or small venue show you attend, I'll make sure that the band or singer is warned away from you. You won't stay retired? Then we'll make sure you don't make another dime from Seattle's music scene. Not a fucking penny."

"You can't—"

"I _will_!" I snapped. "I've played them all, Aro. I played them all before you slithered into my life, and if I have to play them again just to keep you away, I will. I still know all the owners, dumbass. Also…the media works both ways, buddy," I said with a derisive chuckle. "The whole world will know that you're a piece of shit, that you threw your son under the bus, that you cheat and lie and manipulate. And I'll do it without even lifting a finger… It won't even break the nondisclosure agreement." I laughed in his face. "But the next time you see my wife, you'd better fucking run."

"That bitch'll ruin you," he hissed, shoving me back.

My fist flew before Emmett could move, before Aro even blinked. It hit the bastard perfectly across his face, giving a satisfying _crack_ as his nose broke. Emmett was on me, pulling at me, but I grinned in Aro's face as his knees finally buckled.

Bending down in front of him, I smiled at the trickle of blood escaping his nose. "No, Heidi would've ruined me, considering she was sleeping with your son…and probably you, too, right?"

It was a pure guess on my part, truly. It seemed fitting, like it would've been something he'd do to keep the upper hand. When his eyes widened, I sighed as my suspicions were true.

"Wow, you're just… Does your wife know, Aro?" I laughed, shaking my head and standing up in front of him. "How 'bout James?"

"I think James knows now, bro," Emmett said through a chuckle, smacking my shoulder lightly and pointing toward the door of the bar.

"I'm gonna sue you all!" Aro grumbled.

James was a blur out the door, and another smack to Aro's face resounded around us. He loomed over his father with balled-up fists. "Shame, _Dad_," he spat, his lip curling. "Looks like you've tripped and fallen. I'm willing to bet no one saw a thing… What'choo think, Mase? Em?" he asked, never breaking his gaze from his dad.

My eyebrows shot up, glancing to Emmett, who was standing like he was waiting for James to turn our way. He didn't move from in front of Aro but turned his head toward us.

"I know we're not supposed to be within a hundred feet of Bella. We're not staying. So…no need for cops. I've seen enough of them, thanks to this asshole. Go!"

Emmett gripped my shoulder to pull me inside, but I watched as James handled his father roughly, shoving him toward the side of the building toward the parking lot.

"It wouldn't shock me if Aro ended up on a milk carton," Emmett muttered, smirking when I snorted a little and shook my head.

Suddenly, I sighed deeply. It was in relief, in the lifting of something heavy that had been on my shoulders for so damn long. It was a sigh of pity, too. I just felt sorry for all of them; not that it changed my hatred of them, but they were just a big fucking mess – Heidi, James, and Aro. And as of that moment, they could all have each other. They could wallow in their misery together. But I'd meant what I'd said… I'd tell every act in Seattle about Aro Volturi, if only so he never made another dime.

I turned to go back inside, and that's when I saw my angel standing in the doorway. Her eyes narrowed on me, like she was checking me over to see if I was okay.

Opening my arms for her, I waited until she walked to me, and then I lifted her up in a big hug, burying my face into her neck.

"You okay, Edward?" she whispered, dropping kisses to my jaw until I grinned.

Nuzzling her neck, I closed my eyes at the feel of her, the smell that I simply couldn't live without, and the pure love of her.

Pressing a kiss just below her ear, I smiled, whispering, "I am now."

**~oOo~**

_**Three years later…**_

Sweat poured down my face as I screamed, "Thank you, Seattle! Good night!" I pushed off the mic and threw my shirt into the audience.

Pyro and lasers flashed in a frenzy of color and heat as I ran from one side of the stage to the other, reaching out to touch my audience. We always made Seattle the last stop of the tour. It worked for us. It was fantastic to make home the final show.

_Masen! Masen! Masen!_

_I love you, Masen!_

_One more! One more! One more!_

Grinning, I saluted them as all the boys came to the edge of the stage to take a bow before Emmett led us toward the back.

If I'd ever had doubts about Chainsaw Records or producing our own music – or other bands' music, for that matter – I'd been mistaken. It was the best music we'd ever made. From the song that I wrote for my angel, all the way down to the album we'd produced with Eternal Darkness, who toured with us regularly, we'd now solidified ourselves in the music business. Award after award, platinum records, number-one hits, even movie scores – we'd done it all. And we'd done it honestly, with hard work and laughter. It reminded me of the days Jasper and I had first started Radiant Eclipse.

Our tours were shorter now, even the ones overseas. We played to bigger audiences but with fewer stops. We were happier, healthier, and better that way.

Emmett guided me through the back halls, along with the rest of the guys. We were all still there – Alec, Jasper, Jake, and Mike. We'd grown, we were family, and we were as tight as we'd ever been. And despite my last run-in with Aro and James, we never saw them. They avoided us, and we were too fucking busy to give a shit.

The dressing room was pretty hectic, bustling with activity. Kate and Tanya were packing up, helping Alice, whose tummy was bigger than she was, it seemed. She and Jasper were expecting their first, after a few heartbreaking tries. Carrie was there with Tia, who wriggled down from her mother's arms to launch herself at Alec. She was going on five and looked like her dad more and more every day.

"Hi, Uncle Masen!" she sang, her little cheeks blushing pink.

"Ah, my fairy girl!" I said, bending to kiss her neck with raspberries that never failed to make her squeal. Grinning, I tugged her braids, catching the bottle of water that Tanya tossed my way, along with a towel right behind it. "Thanks."

Jake was married now, and he and Leah were chatting in the corner. He'd lost his father two years ago, and we thought for sure the band would lose him, too, but he pushed on. Honestly, I think he needed the band, needed us. For a bit, he was lost, going back to his weed smoking, but he got through it, cleaning up okay.

"Hey, Masen," I heard behind me as I plopped down onto the sofa, wiping the sweat from my face. I smiled up at Chelsea, who had her fingers linked with Mike's. They'd been inseparable the moment we'd signed Eternal Darkness to Chainsaw Records.

"Yup?"

"Rose says we have an interview."

"We?"

"Yeah, me… _Music Mania Magazine_," she replied, looking nervous. "Should I be worried?"

"Nah, Jessica's cool. Just keep your head straight when talking to her. She's good at what she does. Who's the photographer?"

"Laurent?"

"Keep his ass out of your meeting."

"Rose said the same thing. Felix is walking him out of the building."

"Then you're good, kiddo." I smiled her way, taking another water from Tanya. "You'd think Laurent would get the hint after this many years."

Tanya grinned. "You'd think. Your parents were here, but your dad got an emergency call, so he said to tell you they'd see you later. He also said to tell you his five-year ceremony is coming up. He wants you guys there."

"I'm aware. I think Rose scheduled the whole fucking tour around it," I muttered, smirking when Tanya laughed.

"I did," Rose called out from the other end of the sofa. We smiled at that, but we were so proud of my dad for all his hard work and only a handful of panics along the way. He had stayed completely sober.

Nodding, I wiped my face again. I was tired but still amped up from the show. I was ready for this break. I wore so many hats, so many masks, these days that I was exhausted…happy and satisfied but exhausted. Hopefully, the next few months would be a vacation. I was still Masen to the world and my fans. I was Edward to my wife, friends, and family, and I was producer, songwriter, and lead singer. It felt like I'd been constantly _on_ for some time.

The thought of my wife made me smile behind the towel, but I glanced around the noisy dressing room. She was busy as ever these days – talent scouting, bookkeeping and web manager for the studio, and…

"Daddy!" I heard from the door, grinning as the other half of my heart was set down on chubby legs in order to rush to me. "Daddy…Daddy…"

I scooped up my son, falling back against the cushions of the sofa. He was almost three and the carbon copy of me, with a dash of Bella thrown in for good measure. He had my hair, only a bit darker, my crooked smile, but he had her warm, deep-brown eyes, with flecks of green and gold in them.

Benjamin Charles Cullen had been born while I had been home recording. Bella and I had specifically scheduled it that way, almost from the second she'd found out she was pregnant. I wanted to be there for almost every damn second, and aside from a few shows that required us to travel – talk shows, award shows, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, where Radiant Eclipse had proudly inducted Chainsaw Charlie Swan, and finally, much to my wife's and Rose's happiness, _Saturday Night Live_ – I was there for most of Bella's pregnancy. Even better, I was there the day he took his first look at the world around him.

"Benny, did Aunt Tori do your hair again?" I asked in a chuckle, because he was spiked up with that spray-in blue sparkly shit in his hair. He actually looked pretty damn awesome in a tiny Radiant Eclipse T-shirt, dark jeans, and the smallest pair of Docs I'd ever seen.

"Yup! Rock star like you, Daddy!"

Laughing, I cupped his face, kissing his forehead. "I love you, buddy."

"Love you…" He sat happily on my lap, his fingers tracing my ink, but we both looked over to Bella when she sat down on the sofa beside us. "Mum…mumumum," he sang to himself, bouncing a little.

Grinning, I leaned over to kiss her lips. "Missed you, angel."

"Missed you, too, Edward," she sighed happily. Pulling back, she looked at us both, smiling a smile that was just for us. "My handsome men," she crooned, kissing me again. "I'm glad you're back, baby."

We'd only been apart for a few weeks, but we'd gotten used to it. Benny loved to see me on the video chat, and Bella and I continued our traditional games and texting, but coming home to her and Ben was always the best part of it all, even though the two of them met me out on the road occasionally. There was nothing like home. It was where we'd met, where I'd fallen in love with her, and where I'd leave my heart when I'd travel. It was the studio apartment that now included the space upstairs where we'd added a staircase, turning the upper floor into our bedroom, a nursery for Ben, and a small office. It was where I'd play the piano for my son – or Bella – when sleep couldn't be found. And it was where my soul ached to be, so I could play with Benny and Fender, who was happy, fat, and lazy, and where I'd love my wife once our little man went to bed.

Hugging Ben, I sat up to kiss my wife, my love, my best friend. My angel. She knew me better than anyone, better than I knew myself, and she was my best friend and the best thing to ever happen to me. She'd given me a safe place to land, open arms to fall into, and a smile on my face. She was my protective angel, my smart girl, and the mother to my son. And despite the fact that she was my biggest fan, I just wanted my family. She smiled against my lips as she probably knew the next words out of my mouth.

"Angel, I wanna go _home_."

She kissed my lips again, nuzzling our son's chubby cheek. "Then let's get you home."

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Eternal Blackness was inspired by a real band called Pretty Reckless. The girl's voice is pretty awesome. I'll add the song that I described to the playlist, along with the Saliva song from the beginning.**

**Again, I'd like to thank all of you that came on this journey with me. It started out as just something fun and easy, and it has truly been one of the most enjoyable times I've had writing. I want to thank everyone that has reviewed, rec'd, and nominated this fic continuously. I read them all, and I love them all. I love your theories and excitement, your love for Masen/Edward and his angel, not to mention your rollercoaster of emotions over all they went through. I just need to thank all of you.**

_**Man Behind the Mask**_** now nominated for the Fanatic Fanfic Awards, along with a shockingly large amount of my other stuff. HUGE THANK YOU to all that nominated me and my fics. I'm in fantastic company, people I love, respect, and fangirl over. The link is on my profile if you want to check it out. :)**

**I need to thank my pre-readers: GooberLou, Pamela (DrivingEdward), Jodi (inkedupmom), and Sue (Suebee0619)… I don't know what I would've done without any of you. Hugs to all of you, because honestly, you've all been through the wringer lately… We've had health issues, loss, and huge moves, and in spite of it all, you guys are my crutch. MWAH…thank you so, so much. **

**Another thank you to Melanie (Edward'sEternal) for always being my behind the scenes cheerleader, and for swapping chapters with me like most women swap recipes. ;) Much love.**

**Finally, Jenny (JenRar)… You scared the shit out of me! Don't do it again! **sigh** I love you…and thank you for all you do. I'm glad you're on the road to recovery, and I can now relax… ;)**

**The big question is always WHAT'S NEXT? I have an idea for something, but I plan on taking my time with it, easing into it once I'm rid of this godforsaken sinus shit. So the answer is…nothing. Not right away. I'll be around on FB and Twitter. **

**It's sad yet satisfying to mark Maskward complete. Thank you all again and again. Until next time… Mooches, Deb ;)**


	28. Outtake - She's All Mine

**A/N… Hey guys, here's the very last of our Rock Starward. ;) Just so you know…this takes place after the Volturi contract is over, after the holidays, and after Fender has been rescued from the rain, but it's before Radiant Eclipse has finished their first independent album. **

**This is also just-for-fun, blatant lemony stuff… LOL It was something I wanted to put into the story but it never fit no matter where I tried to put it. With that said… It's all yours. ;)**

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**Chapter 28 – Outtake – She's All Mine**

_She's got legs, she knows how to use them.  
She never begs, she knows how to choose them.  
She's holdin' leg wonderin' how to feel them.  
Would you get behind them if you could only find them?  
She's my baby, she's my baby,  
yeah, it's alright._

_She's got hair down to her fanny._  
_She's kinda jet set, try undo her panties._  
_Everytime she's dancin' she knows what to do._  
_Everybody wants to see if she can use it._  
_She's so fine, she's all mine,_  
_girl, you got it right_

"_Legs" – ZZ Top_

**BELLA**

The buzzer on the dryer pulled my attention away from the computer. The Facebook page for Radiant Eclipse was doing well. Really well. Rose and I would occasionally post pictures of the boys recording, small audio or video interviews, and a few snippets of past concerts. In just a few months, we'd grown to millions of followers, which also boosted the sales of records and merchandise and would be the big key to ticket sales for the band's next tour – whenever that would be. They were still recording their first independent album.

That thought made me smile as I got up to pull the clothes out of the dryer. I wasn't sure who was more excited to be free of Aro: Jasper, Edward…or me. They were taking their time, writing the best music I'd heard out of them, including the one Edward had specifically written for me. The day they recorded that one, I was a teary, emotional mess. And I'm pretty sure my desk in the office of the studio wobbled just a bit more once I'd done truly naughty things to my husband on top of it.

Pulling all the clothes into the laundry basket, I glanced up at the clock and then out the window down into the alleyway. Edward would be home soon. Rose had set up their photo shoot, and as much as they'd wanted someone local, the photographer they'd liked the best had ended up being in Portland, so the boys had been gone since Thursday. It was now Sunday, and I'd missed Edward with a sickness.

He'd been done touring since before Thanksgiving, and I'd had him all to myself throughout the holidays and the new year. In reality, a few days was nothing in comparison to what we'd endured, but still…I simply missed Edward.

I folded T-shirts, jeans, and balled up socks together as Fender stretched and yawned, hopping down to curl up on the sofa. The little guy had quickly become a member of this house, though he was recovering from being fixed – just one of the reasons I hadn't gone with the band this time. The sound of a car door slamming made my head snap up to gaze out the window.

There he was – leather jacket, hood up on his sweatshirt, overnight bag slung over his shoulder, and jeans that made everything below his waist look like walking sin. But it was his face that made my breath catch – it always did, really. He looked bright eyed, happy, and gorgeous yet determined to get up the stairs.

The front door opened, and he stepped in seemingly larger than life as I dropped the basket of clothes on the bed.

"Angel?" he called but then caught sight of me in the bedroom.

That face…that one…was all mine. He was sexy and sweet, breathtaking, as he pushed the hood off his head and shrugged out of his jacket, sending his hair up in its usual disarray. The smile was slow, crooked, and filled with a deviant darkness to it that I knew better than anyone.

Someone was feeling selfish after being away, but he wasn't the only one.

I was in his arms and lifted up before I could say his name.

"Missed you," I mumbled against the skin of his neck, inhaling the pure scent of him – leather, something woodsy, and just Edward.

"Me, too," he sighed, falling down on the edge of the bed, but he settled me on his lap.

"How'd it go?" I asked, reaching up to rake my fingers through his hair.

His smirk was amusing, but he nodded. "Not bad. The photographer wanted something dark, different. She put us all in like this…post-apocalyptic, sandy, desert-like shit."

"She?" I gasped, though I knew the photographer's partner was a woman. I couldn't help but tease. Rose and I had researched them; they had amazing ideas. "How naked did you get?"

His chuckle was soft as he shook his head. "Not at all! It was fan-fucking-tastic, angel. Lots of makeup, though."

"Mmm, you are rather sexy in guy-liner."

"Shut up," he said through a laugh. "How'd it go with Fender?" he asked with a grimace, because it was a guy-balls-manly thing.

"He's fine." I chuckled and pointed to where the little man was asleep on the sofa.

"I'll check on him in a second," Edward said softly, his eyes on me as he cupped my face. "I just…want to look at you."

Grinning, I looked over his handsome face. He was scruffy but no less beautiful than usual. His eyes were piercing green today, surrounded by long eyelashes that made me envious most of the time.

"Love you," I sighed, bringing his lips to mine as I shifted to straddle his thighs. "It was a long couple of days."

"Love _you_, baby. And you coulda come with," he countered, grinning and wrapping his arms around me.

Unzipping his hoodie, I pushed at it until he shrugged out of it, leaving him in a white T-shirt. "Fender needed me, and you didn't need your wife babysitting a photo shoot, Edward. I'm well aware of how handsome you are, and photographers need to use that. I didn't want my personal opinion to sway things."

He smiled so very sweetly, tilting his head at me as that gloriously sexy blush crawled over his cheeks. I honestly didn't know what it was about that blush made me absolutely crazy for him. Maybe because it was such a contrast to the rest of him – strong, lean muscles, dark swirls of ink, a mouth that was deadly when speaking…and when he wasn't. He was no angel on some levels, nor did he look it, but _that blush_ killed me dead. It made me want to do things to him to see just how long that blush would last…or how quickly it would dissipate.

I didn't give him a chance to say anything, simply leaned in for a kiss. Edward caught up quickly, a groan escaping him as tongues tasted and twisted, hands reached out and gripped and pushed and pulled.

My eyes rolled back a little when his calloused fingers slid stealthily beneath my shirt, only to find just skin, no bra. They trailed lightly down my spine, across my stomach, only to reach their true destination – my piercings.

"Ah, fuck…" I breathed against his lips as thumbs and fingers toyed with the bars through my nipples, sending shockwaves throughout my whole body.

His wicked smile ghosted across my cheek to my neck, only to meet my ear with breathy words. "I missed this," he whispered, opening his mouth to the skin of my throat at the same time his hands cupped and kneaded my breasts. "You…just all of you, angel. I never… I didn't… Fuck, sleeping without you sucks ass."

I giggled at him, muffling the sound into his shoulder. "Edward," I said through a soft laugh, pulling back to see his face. "Yeah, me, too."

Gathering the bottom of my shirt, he smiled, saying, "Let me see you, angel." I held up my arms, and he swiftly removed my shirt, leaving me astride his lap in only my jeans. His eyes darkened as he bent me back a little. "Ladies, did you behave while I was gone?"

My laugh couldn't be stopped. It never could when he teased me like that. It was such an _Edward_ thing – silly and sweet and only mine.

Tongue and teeth teased each piercing, hands flattened over my stomach, my ink, my back. It was a reacquainting thing for Edward, something I noticed he did no matter how long apart we'd been. When I sat up straight in his lap, I met his gaze.

"It doesn't change, angel," he whispered in awe. "This…" He gestured between us. "You're… I'm… You have no idea what it's like…to get to come home…_to this_."

He turned, depositing me on the bed, only to stand up. He kicked out of his Docs, reaching back in that sexy-as-hell guy way of taking off his shirt, which he dropped somewhere on the floor. He was so beautiful – ink and muscles, fitting jeans, and his hair standing up in every way – as he leaned over me to reach for the button of my jeans, which were removed quickly, leaving me only in my black underwear.

The grin that curled up on his face was wicked, deadly, as he dragged his tongue across his bottom lip. "Fuck, you're the most beautiful, the sexiest fucking thing I've ever laid eyes on. You _really_ are like every song ever written."

I couldn't help but giggle at him, because it reminded me so much of the morning after we'd first made love. "You never did finish that list, Edward," I taunted, starting to sit up, but he grabbed me by the legs and yanked me to him, a deadly gleam in his eye.

"Don't tempt me, angel."

When I merely raised an eyebrow at him in challenge, he grinned and nodded. "Okay…where to begin?" he purred low and raspy, his gaze raking over every inch of me.

He knelt on the bed between my legs, and I couldn't help but wrap them around his strong thighs. He loomed tall on the bed, those talented fingers slipping softly up and down my legs, both inside and out.

"ZZ Top said…" he started, grinning when I cracked up. "_Legs_," he continued, still touching mine softly, teasingly, never coming anywhere near where I needed him. "She knows how to use them," he whispered, lifting my leg up a little in order to drop a long kiss to my kneecap. "I want her," he sang, "said I got to have her…the girl is all right…"

Suddenly, the fact that he was singing the song instead of merely teasing just about made me tackle him off the bed and to the floor. His voice, while usually meant for large audiences and heavy songs, took on a completely different tenor when he sang for me…_to me_. It was soft, unsure, but no less talented. In fact, I could see the future father in him when we decided to have kids – singing and rocking them to sleep, playing the piano for them.

Kisses dropped to my knee again, and he rained them down the inside of my thigh. Just when I thought he'd remove my underwear, he braced a hand by my head, cupping my face with his free hand.

He hummed something different against my lips, a new song. "Lips like sugar," he crooned, "sugar kisses…"

I kissed him back, but he pulled away too soon, picking up my hand. He doted on the heart-shaped E on the inside of my wrist, turning my hand in order to love on my inked wedding band. Those dark-green eyes met mine as he changed songs again.

"I'll be wrapped around your finger." He smiled when I laughed softly at him, pressing a half dozen more kisses to the ink that matched his own hand. He continued to hum that song the vibrations tickling the inside of my arm until he met my lips again. He opened his eyes to meet mine, only to change to a song even my dad used to sing to me. "My brown-eyed girl," he crooned, shaking his head as if he couldn't believe I was real. He didn't even bother to sing it.

Kissing me softly, he sat back again on his knees, shaking his head again, saying, "Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top."

He chuckled when I laughed hard and loud at the girly song, the Top 40 hit he tossed in there. But my laughter faded when I felt his hand grip my underwear in a tight, strong fist. My body arched up, silently begging him to do something, anything, but his gaze was hungry as he kept his fist right where it was, like he was fighting with himself not to rip, to tear.

He slipped off the edge of the bed, pulling me until my ass almost fell off, but he spread my legs, his nose leaving a warm, breathy trail up my thigh.

"Tastes so good, make a grown man cry," he practically growled as he closed his eyes, gripping the lace again in a fist.

"Edward…" I begged, pulling at him with my legs, reaching for him with my hands, but he grinned, dragging that evil tongue along his bottom lip again.

"So many more songs, angel…" he said with a chuckle.

Narrowing my eyes at him, I tapped the bed. "Yeah, well…_my turn_, baby. Drop the jeans and get up here."

He froze, seemingly unsure for a moment, but stood up tall to do as I'd said. Those dark-green eyes stayed locked on to me as he unbuttoned his jeans and slid the zipper down. Once he stepped out of them, he was left in black, form-fitting boxer-briefs. From the ink that rolled with every movement of his thighs, to the colorful designs that covered his arms and torso, my eyes roamed every gorgeous inch of him, including the part of him that wanted me the most. He was hard, his hands twitching a little at his sides as he let me just…look.

When my eyes met his again, he smirked a little, starting to move toward the bed, but I stopped him.

"Do you trust me?" I asked him softly, standing up in front of him. When he shifted to reach out to touch me, I grasped his wrists gently with a grin. "Edward, do you trust me?"

I wanted to laugh at the expression on his face. There was a flicker of fear, but mostly there was want and curiosity, and when he nodded, I could see he meant it. Reaching up to trail a finger across his chest, across the words _Thicker Than Water_, I licked my lips. Stepping around him, I couldn't help but do the same to the treble clef with angel's wings on his shoulder blade. I kissed that one, simply because he'd gotten it to represent me.

Leaving my lips on the skin of his back, I whispered, "I'm feeling…_selfish_, Edward. Like…_extra_ selfish."

He huffed a sexy laugh, glancing back over his shoulder to meet my gaze. "So was I. You stopped me."

Grinning, I nuzzled his shoulder. "Yeah, but I wanna try something."

Fuck, if I'd thought his eyes were dark before, I was mistaken. They dilated a touch further, giving my husband an almost feral look. I walked away from him to the laundry basket, snatching up two of his bandanas, and then set the basket on the floor.

Running them through my hands, I met Edward's fierce gaze. "_Really_ selfish, Edward."

"Ah, shit…" he breathed, shaking his head, but a crooked, nervous smile curled up one side of his mouth. "Bella…" he said, a warning laced in the tenor of his voice.

"Bed, Edward." I pointed to the headboard of our bed, and he grumbled about trust and beautiful brunettes and the inability to touch what was his.

Before he could change his mind, I followed him until he was leaning back against the pillows, and then I straddled his stomach. He fought me for a split second before relenting, and I tied his right arm to the headboard. When I picked up his left hand, I kissed his inked wedding band, meeting his worried gaze.

"You… You're…" He glanced around, looking for something, but then back to my face as I secured his left wrist to the bed. "Angel, I don't…"

Frowning down at him, I asked, "Don't what?"

"I don't…w-wanna be…"

Grinning, I leaned down to press my lips to his. "Not gonna hurt you, Edward. Ever. No spanking. I was only teasing you when I'd said that. No," I said, sitting up straight, "I just want to play with you."

I was pretty damn sure there wasn't a sexier sight on the planet as I took in strained, flexing muscles, colorful ink, and his handsome, now much more relaxed face. Sometimes, who and what he was came barreling at me like a freight train. As silly and sweet as my Edward was, I knew for a fact that Masen was one of the most wanted, sexiest men out there. He had the magazine covers, the photo shoots, and the fans to prove it. And a small, evil smile curled up on my face as I realized that he was mine. Not a fucking soul would ever see what I was seeing. They could imagine it, fantasize about it, but they would never have this.

Leaning down, I kissed him, humming that he let me control it, take it as deep and messy as I wished. It took all I had to pull away, because I needed one more bandana.

**~oOo~**

**EDWARD**

I wasn't sure I'd ever felt as vulnerable as I did at that moment. As Bella scrambled off me, it left me feeling naked – despite the underwear I was still in – and exposed. It was the latter that was the most unnerving. Anything could happen with my hands bound. Anything. And if it weren't for the look of pure love and want coming from the sexiest woman I'd ever seen, I would've been fighting like hell to get loose.

But Bella was looking at me like I was something to eat, like I was her next meal, and fuck me, if that wasn't damned hot. We'd joked and laughed about Senna's lifestyle, how restraint could be the ultimate in selfish. Bella had teased me about Senna's old crush and her dominatrix lifestyle, which wasn't my thing, but holy shit, all the ideas of what Bella _could _do to me made my dick throb.

"Bella…angel," I whispered, looking at my bound wrists but then back to her as she came over to me with another of my bandanas. Straddling my stomach still in just those gorgeous lacy underwear, she folded up the material, and I knew what she was about to do. "Blindfold?" I rasped, swallowing nervously.

"Look at me," she ordered in a whisper against my lips. "I want to make you feel good. Just feel, Edward." She kissed me to distraction, and my hips rolled up, aching for friction, her touch, anything. I was out of breath with she pulled away.

Just before she covered my eyes, I raised an eyebrow at her. "Just so you know, angel…" I said, my voice a touch threatening if only to tease her. "I reserve the right to reciprocate."

Her laugh was sexy and soft and deep. "Oh, I hope so…but _not today_."

If anything could make me relax, to settle in and just go with it, it was that laugh, that easy shit that we had. I was grinning when my sight went black, and I lifted my head so she could tie the blindfold in the back.

I'd heard that when one sense is taken away, the others come into sharp focus; they become better, stronger. My skin was the first thing to kick into overdrive. I could feel everything around me – the harshness of the headboard against my bound wrists, the softness of the sheets of our bed, but sweet God, I could feel the heat of her pussy as she stayed astride my stomach. Next were the light touches from her fingers – down my arms, across my chest, along my jaw, and over my lips.

My sense of smell kicked in next. When I'd first gotten home, the apartment had smelled like coffee in the kitchen and the clean laundry she'd been folding. Now…now it was the smell of our bed, which was a combination of the two of us, and slowly it became the scent of her skin, her perfume, and…

"Goddamn, I can…smell you, baby," I groaned, my head falling back as I licked my lips in want of her. "You smell so good…fuck…"

She shifted off me, shaking the bed a bit. I could hear her better, too, and I gasped in surprise when her hands gripped the waistband of my underwear to pull them off me. I practically growled when her skin met mine, along with what felt like her hair and lips teasing the skin of my thighs, my hips, the trail of hair just below my navel. When tongue was added into the mix, my hands gripped the bandanas binding me and the bars I was tied to, my whole body tensing up.

Bella teased, never quite putting her mouth where I was most likely leaking for her. If the tables were turned, I'd have been feasting on her.

"Yeah?" she asked against one of my nipples as she moved her way up, and I could hear the amusement in her tone that I'd spoken my thoughts again. "What else would you do, Edward?"

I huffed a laugh, shaking my head. "I don't think so, angel. I'll save that list for my turn. Fuck, Bella…you feel good…"

She'd allowed every inch of her skin to touch mine, and she slid gloriously bare up my body until she was back across my chest. Her finger skated lightly across my bottom lip.

"I want your mouth on me," she whispered, shifting higher. The scent of her was intense, the heat indescribable, and when her thighs landed on either side of my head, the taste of her was phenomenal.

I may have been temporarily blind, but I knew my girl. Every fucking inch of her. I knew what she loved, what made her even wetter than she already was, and I didn't need my hands for it. Hell, I didn't even need to see her face, because her sounds told me I was doing it right. I licked and nibbled, teased with teeth, and sucked hard on every bit of her pussy. My name, along with a few choice words, burst out of her as I drank her in, tasted her, devoured her.

She rode my face, and I hummed against her flesh when she completely shattered against my mouth.

She slid languidly down my body, and her hands were flat against my skin, only to brace on my stomach. I readied myself for it, because her hand wrapped around my aching cock, lining me up at her entrance.

"Shit…" I hissed, my head pressing back to the pillows behind me, and I struggled against the restraints. "Fuck…fuck…" I ground out through gritted teeth as she slipped down over me. She was warm and wet and too fucking still. "Angel…_please_!"

Bella started to move, and she was fluid motion, making me and herself feel good – up, down, and then a swivel to her hips that had us both cursing under our breath. Cries for more and harder and faster left my mouth, and I felt her lean over me, riding me in a different angle. I almost came at the change but bit my lip in order to maintain. My imagination ran wild at how stunning she probably looked, but her kisses broke my train of thought. She held on to my arms to ride me and kiss me, and fuck, I wanted to see her.

"Baby, baby…I'm…_close_," I rasped, squeezing my eyes closed against the rush coursing through me as I moved with her, thrusting up when she'd come down.

Bella shifted again, her hands on my face, and she shoved the blindfold up. We faltered a bit, but my eyes locked on to naked and beautiful and sweaty.

My fists shook as I fought the bandanas. I wanted to touch the amazing sight riding me. "That's fucking better. I love watching you fuck me, angel."

The evil yet tired grin that crawled across her face was stunning and sexy. She was chasing another orgasm, I could tell it by the clench of her walls around me, the falter of her movements, and the catch of her breath.

"I can help you come, Bella…" I urged her, tugging at the restraints. "You feel close…you are… I can tell, baby."

As fun as it was letting her have her way with me, I lived to touch my wife. I lived to hold her, kiss her, give her everything she needed in order to fall over the edge. There was something about working together to reach the high.

"Angel…please. Let me touch you," I begged, my eyes rolling back when she shifted over me.

"Love you…" she whispered against my lips, only to kiss me deeply but too brief.

"Oh, God… Angel, I love you…please untie me."

Her movements stopped a little as her fingers reached for my right hand and then my left. My hands came free, and with a sigh of relief and an evil grin, I wrapped her up and rolled her, thrusting deep. Her head fell back to the bed, her neck exposed, and I nipped and licked at her throat.

"You're fucking gorgeous all in control, angel," I whispered honestly, bracing a hand by her head, but my free one was making up for the loss of touch. Cupping a breast, teasing a nipple piercing, and then slipping down to where were connected, I reveled in her sounds, her skin. "But you know what's better?" I asked, swirling my tongue just below her ear, and I grinned when her answer didn't even fucking make sense. "It's so hot when you come for me, Bella. When _I_ make _you _come…"

It didn't take much; she'd been damned close already. The deep thrusts, along with my fingers pressing her clit, caused her to unravel, which, in turn, sent me over the edge with her.

Blood pounded in my ears as I buried myself as deep as I could, but my eyes opened as I pressed my forehead to hers. Our breathing was heavy, and Bella looked worn out but thoroughly sated, which made me smile a little before kissing her. And I took my time kissing her, allowing my weight to bear down on her a bit, with turned heads and hums of want.

Pushing back up on my elbows, I brushed her hair from her face. "You kill me dead, angel."

She grinned, wrapping her arms around my neck. "I missed you," she stated, shrugging a shoulder. "Maybe this was my way of keeping you."

I chuckled, trailing my fingers lightly across her cheek. "I've been yours since I barreled into your bar that night, Bella. That won't change."

"Good."

Smirking at her, I shook my head. "God, I love coming home to you. It's the best feeling. It's better than performing, than…_anything_."

Bella smiled, kissing my lips softly, but I felt something land on the bed, and we both turned to see Fender walking toward us. He gave us both a bump with his head.

"Fender's glad you're back, too."

Smiling, I rolled us to our sides, and the little guy curled up to sleep on Bella's pillow. Something comforting and easy washed over me, making me hug my wife closer and reach out to pet Fender. Home – it wasn't hotel after hotel or an empty apartment or even Heidi's place. It was all right there on our bed. I'd been worried that being home would strain us, but Bella and I stayed strong, stayed that easy thing we'd always been.

Our future, no matter what would come, was wide open.

**~ooo~MBtM~ooo~**

**A/N… Thank you guys for coming on this story with me. I know some are wondering what's next, but I don't have an answer for that just yet. **

**I do want to thank everyone that voted for the Fandom Fics awards. I was BLOWN AWAY by what I received. So thank you again. And thanks go to my crazy women that help me out with every word I write – JenRar, Pamela, Goober, Jodi, and Sue. Big Love.**

**Below is the list of the songs Edward used in case you wanted to know…**

"**She's got legs, and she knows how to use them… I want her; said I got to have her…." – "Legs" by ZZ Top**

"**Lips like sugar, sugar kisses…" – "Lips Like Sugar" by Echo and the Bunnymen**

"**I'll be wrapped around your finger…" – "Wrapped Around Your Finger" by The Police**

"**My brown-eyed girl…" "Brown-Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison**

"**Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top" – "All About That Bass" by Meghan Trainor**

"**Tastes so good, make a grown man cry…" – "Cherry Pie" by Warrant**

**The PDF for this story is just about complete. It'll go up on my blog in the next day or so, which will include this outtake. ****Until next time... Mooches, Deb ;)**


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